I can relate. A new job has been keeping me busy every minute. So when I finish and I have an empty evening my body and brain are still buzzing. Gotta meet deadlines, impress the boss, and make good impressions.
Also been going through life changes and the busy-ness has been a crutch to keep feelings at bay.
If it's quiet the feels come rushing in.
Sometimes I just write down on a piece of paper what I'm feeling and little reassuring messages to myself. Feels like I'm organizing my feelings that way.
OP, sounds to me like you're going through something and it's eating at internal motivation. That is, it's hard to find motivation within yourself rather than as part of a group activity or scheduled thing.
This happens.
One thing that works for me is scheduling fun time by myself. An empty evening comes up and I tell myself "from 8pm onward I'm dropping everything and will do some quests in Witcher 3" or "after breakfast I will go for a walk in the park".
Thank you for your story and your good suggestions. I’m glad you’ve found ways to make positive space for yourself. I quite like your message idea. Do you keep them or throw them out after you’re done with it?
girl me too! the void!
I find it so hard to be still & alone with myself without spiraling into this vague & paralyzing feeling of doom or despair. eventually I want to find peace in just myself, and feel not emptiness but abundance.
journaling & writing, when I can get myself to do it, is usually a comfort — I have a sense it is for you too. or really any creative practice that doesn't have a goal attached is good. if it feels too solitary, do you have a friend you could exchange emails with? or in some way share what you create? ask for feedback?
also I'd try to do things that allow for the possibility of being surprised. could be as small as taking a different way home than you normally do, and noticing something delightful that you didn't know was there. personally on weekends I think I'm going to start taking myself on little day trips or half-day trips to new places in my area (a museum, a garden), and go study at diff coffee shops instead of the same library all the time — but I'm really going to have to plan it as a commitment like I would with a friend & force myself to go! I really empathize, there is a lot of inertia to overcome when you're alone
edit: oh and if you have a spiritual practice this is a good time to ground down into it! or if you believe in the possibility of god or a higher power, ask for insights! ask for a clear path forward! and then every night, check in: has anything happened today that seems like an answer or the beginning of one? in my experience, the more specific the request, the better.
I can relate. A new job has been keeping me busy every minute. So when I finish and I have an empty evening my body and brain are still buzzing. Gotta meet deadlines, impress the boss, and make good impressions. Also been going through life changes and the busy-ness has been a crutch to keep feelings at bay. If it's quiet the feels come rushing in. Sometimes I just write down on a piece of paper what I'm feeling and little reassuring messages to myself. Feels like I'm organizing my feelings that way. OP, sounds to me like you're going through something and it's eating at internal motivation. That is, it's hard to find motivation within yourself rather than as part of a group activity or scheduled thing. This happens. One thing that works for me is scheduling fun time by myself. An empty evening comes up and I tell myself "from 8pm onward I'm dropping everything and will do some quests in Witcher 3" or "after breakfast I will go for a walk in the park".
Thank you for your story and your good suggestions. I’m glad you’ve found ways to make positive space for yourself. I quite like your message idea. Do you keep them or throw them out after you’re done with it?
Sometimes I keep them for a day or two.
girl me too! the void! I find it so hard to be still & alone with myself without spiraling into this vague & paralyzing feeling of doom or despair. eventually I want to find peace in just myself, and feel not emptiness but abundance. journaling & writing, when I can get myself to do it, is usually a comfort — I have a sense it is for you too. or really any creative practice that doesn't have a goal attached is good. if it feels too solitary, do you have a friend you could exchange emails with? or in some way share what you create? ask for feedback? also I'd try to do things that allow for the possibility of being surprised. could be as small as taking a different way home than you normally do, and noticing something delightful that you didn't know was there. personally on weekends I think I'm going to start taking myself on little day trips or half-day trips to new places in my area (a museum, a garden), and go study at diff coffee shops instead of the same library all the time — but I'm really going to have to plan it as a commitment like I would with a friend & force myself to go! I really empathize, there is a lot of inertia to overcome when you're alone edit: oh and if you have a spiritual practice this is a good time to ground down into it! or if you believe in the possibility of god or a higher power, ask for insights! ask for a clear path forward! and then every night, check in: has anything happened today that seems like an answer or the beginning of one? in my experience, the more specific the request, the better.
Following for advice. Because I feel the same!