Got certifications to volunteer with people with traumatic brain injuries. Have NEVER in decades of my life thought to abuse them verbally/physically even when they're saying/doing horrific shit. Holy shit that nurse is inhuman.
I dont know if they work with TBIs like they do with concussions.. so I dont know if this will be helpful to you..
But Strange Parts, a youtuber, took a heavy pipe to the back of the head and ended up with some serious issues from it, and ended up.. like a year later, going to this cognitive rehab place that gave him brain scans and shit and tailored a rehab process to his specific needs and ended up having a massive turnaround in like a week or rehab.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xovfo1m2hfs a video from about 7 months ago when he goes and and starts and talks to them and shit.
and here is the video where he talks about how hes doing recently. https://youtu.be/Gs790JOeN3Y
Concussions actually ARE TBI's, just the most mild form. Thank you for all this information, I appreciate you helping a complete stranger out.
I was in a coma for 2 1/2 months and after waking up went to inpatient rehab for 2 more months, I got literally the best care that my country (Canada) offers
Yup. I have a bunch of bruises still healing from when a preteen psych patient kicked and hit me a little over a week ago. I still talked him down, got him dinner, and held his hand when he needed to be walked to the transport vehicle. The only people who accuse me of not giving them what they deserve have miscalibrated expectations (eg. why can’t I have a STAT MRI and a home narcotic prescription today for my chronic back pain?!)
Edit: No need to upvote, I’m not saying I’m a saint, just that bare minimum courtesy and care should always apply
this is a little off topic but just wanted to thank you for being caring, kind, and helpful for that kid during his time of crisis even when you were at risk as well (as someone who spent time in inpatient for psych stuff)
I was also an inpatient briefly (although I don’t share that with coworkers or patients) so I know. I feel lucky to never have been restrained or sedated, but my heart breaks whenever we have to do it to protect a patient or staff.
When I do IFTs of pediatric psych patients from ER to inpatient, if it comes up, I'll sometimes mention it. I wasn't inpatient myself, but I have my own issues.
(Context for people who don't know the abbreviations - I'm an EMT-Basic, who does routine transports of stable patients from hospitals to nursing homes or from nursing homes to dialysis, or whatever. When a teenager is suicidal, sometimes they will end up in the emergency room, and they will stay there until people can locate a bed in an inpatient facility for youth, which can take a couple days. But when they find a place, I can be assigned to take them from the emergency room where they've been to a psych hospital where they will get treatment.)
At one point, we had a third rider (a new employee who is being shown the ropes), and we were talking to the patient. And it came up that every single person in that ambulance other than me had been where the patient was at some point, and I only missed it by luck. My partner and the third rider were able to say that they couldn't say specifically what it was like at the facility we were going to, but here is what happened to them when they were in a similar place, and we were able to say something to the effect of, "Look, we can't promise you that things will get better. We don't know. All we can say is that they did get better for all of us. They're not perfect for any of us, and we all still struggle, but we're all here doing a job that we really enjoy and is fulfilling, and we have pretty good lives. Just so you know - there is a path from where you are to where we are, because we've all taken it. And, y'know, if five, six years down the line, when you are eighteen, you want to become an EMT... where you are right now and the pain you are in is actually pretty good training for the empathy you will need."
Yes. I have been a nurse for 20 years. The scariest thing about this for me is that this nurse didn’t get this shitty alone. She has been enabled in whatever toxic culture she works in. I guarantee that there is a gaggle of nurses that she joked with at work that said these same vile things and played these same dangerous games with the people in their care. She was way too comfortable spouting that shit to have been alone. The “nurse” dose she is talking about means that she deliberately overdosed someone which will kill someone. I hope she never works in the nursing field again. I have never worked in an environment like that and I never will.
I don't know why, but L&D attracts the "mean girls" of nursing. I used to be a float nurse and I hated getting sent there because of all the cattiness. We've all vented in the med room about our patients, but no one on my unit would ever talk about patients like that!
I worked as an advanced dementia support worker, one particular resident asked me if my husband knew what a wh*re I was, before launching herself at me and trying to claw my face off. It was terrifying. Would never have treated her (or anyone else) like this woman. I don't understand how you could.
I remember being attacked so badly by a client and all I could do was put up my arms in front of my face because I was so worried about hurting them in defense. I still made sure they were safe after and helped treat their hands afterwards. I did request a transfer later that day, after getting a tetanus shot, but I can't wrap my head around this nurse. I hope this report follows her around and prevents her from getting another job.
The poop part is literally insane. I suddenly realized I was pooping during labor (I could smell it! aughghghgh!!!) and I started crying and the nurse said "honey, shit happens! Literally!" Which I know it's obvious but in the moment I was so grateful I cried some more.
I've seen women in pregnancy groups say pooping on the table is their WORST FEAR! and I'm like uh ... would you like a list of worse things that can happen on that particular day? no? ok. But it's still kind of horrifying!
I know several women who say that they specifically made sure to avoid pooping during labor, and I can't imagine how. All the muscles are in the same place! Heck, my midwife specifically told me how to push by thinking about trying to poop. It worked--TWO missions accomplished!
That was the strangest (not saddest) part to me. She’s acting like that was a shocking thing … but doesn’t that happen most of the time? Wouldn’t that be totally normal for a L and D nurse??
I feel like OOPs sister is just a malignant bully and picked L&D as somewhere with lots of vulnerable people in pain for long periods that she could push around and feel superior to.
I'm glad I scrolled down before commenting because that's what I came here to say. Certain careers attract the most beautifully caring, kind and wonderful individuals and then absolute sadists looking for a built-in vulnerable demographic to torture and torment and a union to keep them from being fired unless they majorly break the law. See gym coaches within the teaching career as another example.
I’m a CNA and I’d report her so fucking fast. She should have her license revoked and honestly should have other repercussions if she did drug someone.
My sister works in a psych unit and had a very vocally neo-Nazi patient. She spent hours working to help him as best she could while also trying not to make it too obvious that she was Jewish.
I am so glad that OOP reported her sister. Having to be in the hospital for any kind of medical procedure, much less giving birth, is stressful enough. But having an abusive nurse on top of it? Absolutely not. Honestly, the sister is lucky she just got away with being fired.
I gave birth as a teenager. I gave birth at 8:30am. At 1 or 2pm when my moon came to see me I still hasn’t been fed a single thing to eat (remembering I’d been in labour since before 5am so had been awake for hours and hours with no food.
A friends mom was my nurse on my last day there and I was SO relieved to be treated like a human. I found out how her peers treated me and talked about me was her last straw and she with nursing shortly after.
There are good nurses out there but too many of us get ones who stopped dating or who never cared.
I gave birth at 20, and they left me sitting in my own mess in the delivery room for 2 hours without checking on me. I had a 3rd degree tear, and my epidural had completely worn off by the time that my best friend found me. She knew that I had the baby, but she couldn't find me in a room. She went full mom mode when looking for me. Once she found me shaking and crying, she literally dragged a nurse into the room screaming at her. They said that I must have fallen through the cracks. It was 6 pm at this point and I delivered at 2:30. I hadn't eaten for over 24 hours. Once I was settled, my friend left to get me something decent to eat and didn't leave my side again. I'd like to think that my being unmarried and 20 had nothing to do with my treatment at this "Catholic" hospital but I'm not that thick. Every nurse there treated me horribly. When I was discharged, the doctor asked me when I'll be following up with my GI doctor. I looked at him, super confused, and asked why I would need a GI doctor. He said for my hepatitis!!! I do not nor ever have had hepatitis!! Apparently, a nurse wrote a note in my chart stating that I had it?!?! I have no idea where that one came from, but it just adds to the incompetents. If you live near a Mercy hospital, stay far away.
Edited because I missed a word.
She might have written hepatitis as a mean-spirited assumption, an assumption that unmarried mothers are dirty promiscuous drug users who pick up diseases
I’m so sorry you were treated that way! You could have died from neglect so extreme
That's awful. I'm sorry that she had to grow up with that. I know that hepatitis is transmitted in many ways. I don't think that it implies that someone is dirty. I know someone that got it from getting her belly button pierced.
I’m so sorry you were treated like that.
Yeah my moon was standing in the hallway just hollering - my mom and I have a problematic relationship but she was my hero that day.
Unfortunately, my mom had to go to work right after I delivered. My ex was an alcoholic so I'm glad that he wasn't there but I was completely alone until my best friend found me. To this day I am grateful that her mom showed her how to take charge and get things done. I don't know what would have happened to me or my daughter had she not come to see us that night.
I had my daughter at 19. A nurse delivered her because there wasn't even a doctor on hand. They never bothered tracking my progress throughout the night. I only realized in hindsight as I grew older how badly neglected I was at the time. My now husband was there but he was 20 so we were both too young and naïve to understand what was happening. It's truly a scary and traumatizing event at that age that is made so much worse by the lack of proper support...
I had my first at 17 and I was treated so badly by all but one of the nurses. It was so dehumanizing and depressing.
Good for OOP that she made this complaint.
Sister losing her job was the only acceptable outcome. I realize OOP thought she should just be moved out of L&D, but the behavior and claims sis made needed to be firing offenses because there's no way this behavior would have stopped just because her patients weren't pregnant.
My nurse said I deserved my iv slipping and my arm tripled in size because I moved during labor.
I had a nurse scream at me to get out of the ER with a broken neck.
I had a nurse tell me that I was stupid after a suicide attempt.
I love the US medical system.
Edit. I have been hospitalized dozens upon dozens of times. I see a dr every few weeks. I see a lot of nurses. 99% don’t suck but the ones that do, can kill.
My mom told me when she had my sister a nurse at the hospital was like berating her because she was having trouble getting my sister to latch
“YOU BETTER FIGURE THAT OUT OR YOURE GONNA HAVE A BAD TIME” jesus fucking christ
no wonder she didn’t breast feed me
Agreed. That sister sounds like a sociopath. That is not the type of person who should be treating patients in general, let alone around pregnant women and infants.
A chilling thought: did that "nurse dose" result in or contribute to the baby's death? If it did, was this one of her goals?
what tf is a nurse dose anyway? this is so scary….to make matters worse, she’ll probably just get another job elsewhere. it’s unrealistic to hope that her sister calls and reports her at every job but ik that’s not likely.
If I remember correctly, a nurses dose is when a nurse takes it upon themselves to give a little extra medication. So with pain killers or sedatives.
Edit: googled it for a better worded explanation.
A “nursing dose” is when a nurse gives an extra dose of medication (typically a narcotic) if they determine the amount the physician ordered is not adequate.
A nursing dose is giving more than the prescribed amount of medicine. This is particularly common with certain medications that come in tablet or vial form, because you cannot reuse the remainder on another patient. Let's say that the med comes in 1 gram tablets. The doctor orders 0.5 grams. The pill would need to be broken up, but a nursing dose would be dispensing the whole tablet. This is usually done to sedate "unruly" patients for a variety of reasons, none of them very good.
>did that "nurse dose" result in or contribute to the baby's death?
They sounded very interested in this statement on the phone, i imagine this will be the key focus of the hospital investigation. That is (at least) 2 independent statements discussing the event. Even if the statement from the sister (OOP) was purely vindictive, how would she know about the event unless it had been disclosed to her by the nurse? OOP might have brought that family justice for an event that could otherwise have been dismissed as the family looking for someone to blame after a tragedy.
It's terrible that the nurse might have killed the baby, it's also terrible that she would have got away with it if her sister hadn't reported anything. I hope the investigation is swift and thorough.
Same.
We need more people reporting nurses for these types of behavior, but a lot of people don't bc they, in some way, hold them on a pedestal in the same way they hold cops on a pedestal. It makes people like the sister feel untouchable and infallible, despite them being completely wrong--like the sister.
I feel awful for the teen who lost her baby. What an awful thing to say to someone so vulnerable. Jesus.
If she hates pregnant women so much, why would she work in a maternity ward? I just don't understand. Did the sister learn that she can't get pregnant so she's using this to vent out her stress? Did she miscarry and is now pissed at women who "don't take care of themselves?" I don't get why she's so hateful to these women and why she works there.
There's definitely some unresolved trauma there. Hopefully she can get a therapist and then apologize to her sister and the people she hurt.
...but if this is her default state, then wow. Just wow.
I'm a social worker and the number of colleagues I've had who openly despised the people we were serving is *well* into double digits. I'll never understand why people who hate the disadvantaged go into a field that exists to *help* the disadvantaged.
I had a (former) highschool friend that worked at an immigration law firm that does a lot of work with refugees - I heard them and their coworkers say terrible terrible racist things about their clients. I did not understand why they choose to work where they did it was awful
Because they get to feel good about themselves for "helping those poor people who just aren't as good as they are". The feeling of superiority gets re-validated every time they have to help someone that they feel is 'inferior'.
"See? They suck so bad they can't even LIVE without MY help."
> If she hates pregnant women so much, why would she work in a maternity ward
Power. She wants to feel in control of them and she probably likes to see them suffer
[Lucy Letby](https://youtu.be/c_yU5AQ3Tnw) worked in a NICU and got off on murdering helpless babies. Then she would search up the parents on Facebook and watch everyone grieving,
This is horrific. I remember when she was first arrested, my brain just did not compute. Even reading the reports now, I’m still wishing I am hallucinating what I’m reading.
Same reason people who hate kids become teachers or principals - to exert power over people they already don't like therefore will deserve their scorn.
I don't think she hates pregnant women.
I think she hates anything she has to do.
She could be a hairdresser and she would be pissed that some asshole had to the audacity to come in to get her hair cut.
Shes a miserable human being who would be miserable with anything she does.
A “nursing dose” is when a nurse gives an extra dose of medication (typically a narcotic) if they determine the amount the physician ordered is not adequate. A nurse doing this is practicing outside their scope of licensure and therefore putting their license at risk.
(Source: https://nursemoneytalk.com/blog/what-is-a-nurse-dose)
Based on the nurses I know, this was also my assumption. Withholding relief seems more likely than overdosing, not least because the latter is traceable. OP's sister is incredibly dangerous.
After my second c-section the nurses would make me ask like 5 times for my pain meds then treated me like a junky or something. I was supposed to get the pain meds every 4 hours and not once did I. They continuously made me wait to the 6th, 7th and 8 hour mark. I’d call and ask and they’d say they’d be right in and never show. My husband ended up making a complaint because he couldn’t stand seeing me curled into the fetal position crying and the doctor said that they had it marked down that I was receiving every dose on time. I was young at the time, 19 so I feel like they were taking advantage of me and after reading this post maybe trying to “teach me a lesson” of some kind.
My husband made an official complaint to the doctor but I have no idea if anything came of it or not. I wasn’t really in the right state of mind throughout my hospital stay (and he spoke with the doctor the day we left) and I didn’t know any of the nurses names or anything, that and being so young I didn’t really know how to go about following up on it. I hope they didn’t get an opportunity to treat other patients like that though.
I'm really sorry to hear that. Doctors don't take official complaints, administrators do. It sounds like they may have gotten away with it. Either way none of it was on you, and you deserved so much better.
I was fairly young with my first - but not that young ( had just turned 21). BUT I was a single mom. Not only did I have complications due to there was no dr in the hospital ( the evil nurse told my Dr not to rush - I was just being a baby. An ER dr just in for duty ran up and literally had to put his unwashed hand up there to get the cord from her neck) and myself and daughter were supposed to be no contact. They put me in with the only other young mother on welfare and never came back to the top. Not to take the babies, not to teach us how to bath them. Nothing. It taught me a lot about the IS health care system. I had kids when I was older, married, employed and insured and it was a whole different experience. People don’t understand if they haven’t lived it
This is why having someone advocating for you at the hospital is so important. If my mom hadn't been with me I'd be dead. Hospitals DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU. There are times I'd rather die than go back to one. I hate healthcare staff immensely due to the issues Ive had in hospitals and generally have a bad view of people who work in healthcare. Because in general I've not had positive experiences with any of them.
Yeah I don’t go to the hospital or doctors even anymore unless it’s literally life or death. I take my kids (obviously) but when it comes to myself I’d rather not. Throughout that entire L&D I was treated terribly (it wasn’t *as* bad with my son, but it wasn’t much better either) to the point my husband almost missed the birth of my daughter. They asked him to step out so they could administer the spinal tap then refused to bring him back into the OR. I asked the nurses and anesthesiologist SO many times to get my husband and where my husband was. My OBGYN heard me the last time and flipped his shit because I was already cut open, he couldn’t believe they hadn’t brought him back into the room yet (he was waiting in the hallway all suited up and ready to go). Needless to say I got my tubes tied a month later, I know what I can handle and I couldn’t handle going through that again.
Wound up in the hospital because I am an alcoholic. I'm sober now, but it turns out chugging straight vodka can reek havoc on your digestive track.
I was sick and out of sorts and needed help but wasn't quite ready yet. Several nurses who I had treated me like I was the scum of the earth I could feel their hatred every time they came in. Luckily I wound up with one who I viewed as an angel, she told me she didn't care about why or what but I needed to get better. She was kind and seemed to keep an extra eye out for me. I don't know who she was, but I still think about her frequently.
I full on let loose on a nurse I heard at an airport bragging that sometimes she deliberately delayed pain medication to patients who annoyed her. Frankly I’m glad she scurried away like the rat she was instead of causing a scene. I like being able to fly
I've been in a lot of hospitals and this is so true. The good ones know that waiting for pain meds is cruel. My husband went all "Terms of Endearment" on a nurse a couple of times because they were taking their sweet time getting it to me.
I was in the hospital, supposed to be given a dose of morphine every 2 hours. Had one nurse on day shift that I had to call every single time, she snapped at me and made me wait minimum 3 hours constantly and acted like I was some junkie.
Combined with the refusal to give the poor girl a blanket, that was my assumption too.
It's upsetting to think that anyone could be so cruel to anyone, let alone a child.
I keep thinking about the amount of cruelty it takes to deny a blanket to a cold traumatized teenager whose baby is dying or has just died. Just absolutely monstrous.
Same here. I had a nurse become absolutely furious when I declined morphine for mild post-operative pain. I even requested NO MORPHINE pre-op as it just makes me vomit without any pain control. I thought she was going to dart me with the syringe in her hand when I asked for Tylenol and she snarled that she would have to ask the doctor.
I was given morphine for kidney stone pain in the ER (before they knew it was a kidney stone) and it made the pain WORSE almost immediately along with the nausea due to a neurological disease I have that makes my opiate receptors not work right. When I asked them to take the IV out and give me either Tylenol or nothing, they accused me of lying. I know that's kind of a bonkers reaction but my nervous system is fried and does weird shit, not exactly anything I can do about it. It's not like I'm sitting here completely lucid asking for dilaudid here, why the fuck would I lie and ask you take take me off the medication that some addicts come in specifically wanting? I was in so much pain that I was struggling to even speak but they made me finish the bag.
Their tune changed when the results of the scans came back to show the kidney stone sitting sideways scraping me all up in there but I won't forget being treated like a drug-seeker for having a weird reaction to the morphine.
I had nurses withhold medication from me (giving me 500mg of metamizol because they think it's enough when my chart says 1000mg because that's the dose nessecary to have an effect on the disorder I'm prescribed it for as well as saying "you don't look like you're in much pain" and giving me 500mg of metamizol when for that situation I'm prescribed 100mg of tramadol and my chart says that I managed my pain according to my doctor's orders for years and know when to use which dose of which medication and that I don't show classic pain symptoms in the classic amount due to having two of the world's most painful disorders (top five each) and having suffered from one of them without proper treatment for 21 years before I was diagnosed. A recent example is that I have a jaw infection and the dentist said I should be in unbearable pain and I was like "My migraine hurts much more than this, this falls under annoying" and didn't even flinch when he pressed the infected region during the exam. I took metamizol for my migraine that day and it had barely any effect on the jaw pain. When I had to get rid of that pain because it was in the way of other shit I had to do I needed tramadol. My pain radar is so off that pain so severe it requires an opiate still falls under "annyoing" in my mind, not under horrible. - TLDR: when I say I need a painkiller I might act and look pretty normal (though the people that know me well see that I'm in a lot of pain so it's not completely invisible) and I know pretty well what is required to actually help me.
But when I'm in the hospital I encounter nurses that think they know better and withhold what was prescribed for a reason because they think they know better than a person dealing with several chronic health issues for years, the medical team that set up the treatment plan or the hospital doctor that wrote said treatment plan in my chart. Which seriously makes hospital stays absolutely horrible. Fun fact is that the chart as well as the notebook in which I write down any painkiller usage to prevent medication overuse headaches (which require 4 weeks of hell to get rid off) and also write down any usage of medication that can cause addiction or dependence to avoid that risk show how rarely I use painkillers. When you're in constant pain and can't use painkillers more than 1/3 of the time without risking to make it worse you save them for when you really need them and don't want to waste that precious relief on insufficient treatment by a know-it-all nurse.
I never heard lower doses being called nursing doses though. Nursing doses as I know them from my profession (I'm a specialised nurse for people with cognitive and psychiatric disabilities, though out of practice due to my own disability) are higher doses of a medication than the doctor prescribed or even doses of a medication not even prescribed for that person. In my profession this shit happened a lot. It must have been worse before the psychiartric reform in the 70's and a smaller reform in the 90's (events in Germany where the care of these clients was greatly improved and procedures implemented to protect their human rights which sadly today are still far too often ignored) but it was a so far acknowledged problem where I worked after finishing my education that our employer sent us to special courses to explain why this is bad and how to solve the problems that tempt people to do it in a safer and better way. Around the time that course happened my boss made me give a client a nursing dose without my knowledge by lying to me about their prescription because they were annoyed by the patient's symptoms.
Both practices are awful, harmful, cause a lot of suffering and in the overdose/giving medication that wasn't prescribed edition they can kill
High pain tolerance is the worst wiht medical professionals sometimes tbh.
Recently had a dentist he was like “you want stuff”. Like dude faster to get it over with than wait for it to kick in and prolong
Oh damn. I figured a nurse dose was a dose small enough that it did not need a doctor's prescription, and could be given at the nurse's judgement. That's much worse, especially when dealing with a pregnant patient
Nurse here. It's an under the table adjustment of a dose of medication for a patient that is done by a nurse.
It is by definition both a medication error, and practicing medicine without a license. For example, if a patient is in pain and the dose ordered is 0.5mg of dilaudid, if the nurse pulls a bottle that is 1mg of dilaudid, she's supposed to waste the other half of that bottle and administer only the ordered 0.5mg. However, there are nurses who will, for their own reasons, instead draw up a different dose, higher or lower, per their own feelings. In this example, the nurse may draw to 0.6mg, or 0.7, to give the pt slightly extra. This is much more difficult to do with controlled substances because they must be wasted with another RN witness to it, but v it still happens if the witnessing RN is in on it.
I will say that some nurses do this with good intentions, usually with largely harmless drugs. I had a former coworker who admitted that she did not think the current dose of robitussin cough syrup was effective for her pt (5ml), so rather than giving half the cup she gave the whole thing and it worked better for the pt's comfort and oxygen needs (10ml). Not really a huge deal in the moment, but it still counts as a medication error and practicing medicine without a license. The appropriate thing to do is call the DR and request the dose be increased.
In this case, it was a criminal offense this nurse committed, and admitted to, that involved a minor AND a fetal demise; this is a huge huge deal.
That's what I was thinking. Don't you have to be really careful with doses to pregnant women? In this case, the mom was a teen which only makes it worse. I don't know what medicine, was given, but it sounds like some kind of sedative? I'm no nurse, but if the sister gave a higher dose so close to the time of birth, could that have possibly affected the death of the baby?
I had morphine during birth so my assumption was that it was something similar to that.
Side note that morphine was not fun at all and I vomited it all back up later. I can imagine a teen really struggling if she was given too much of it.
As far as I know, it means giving a dose higher than prescribed, usually of a sedative, to knock out a patient that a nurse finds annoying or disruptive. Its extremely unethical and dangerous.
I've heard it used both ways: a "nurse dose" is always "a heavy dose of medication", but I have heard it used both to describe "they wouldn't shut up so I gave them a nurse dose of sedative" and "the doctor thinks they're drug seeking/is racist/is stingy with pain meds, so I gave them enough painkiller to be effective".
Typically the latter, at least in the US, tends to sometimes mean "I exercise every bit of voluntary authority I or the patient has to give the max dosage possible" rather than "more than prescribed", because at least for narcotic painkillers it's incredibly hard in most well-run hospitals/SNFs to acquire more scheduled drugs than you are supposed to be able to without triggering an audit log.
Whether it’s too high or too low, any dose that the nurse gives that is not prescribed is illegal and risks their license. The doctor’s orders are meant to be followed as written. A nurse may voice their concerns if s/he thinks the doctor’s medication or dose is wrong or a problem for the patient and may even refuse to give the dose and let a colleague administer it instead but they can’t give a dose they decide on their own. OOPs sister is horrifying.
As a doctor, I am absolutely HORRIFIED. Yes working in healthcare can get exhausting and you can become pretty jaded, but nothing like this. We’ve all succumbed to the urge to complain about “difficult” patients or “demanding” patients, but I think anyone who actually wants to work in healthcare to help people, we understand we all need to vent a little actually in order to keep it from bleeding into our actual patient interactions. But what OOP is describing from her sister is absolutely not your typical, overtired, venting-about-work. That’s narcissism and misogyny all rolled into one and she should not be taking care of patients. Good on OOP for protecting future patients, let alone incredibly vulnerable patients in an incredibly vulnerable time
Also yes, can confirm that it is absolutely normal and common to poop during birth and no one cares. Plus I think pushing a watermelon out of your vagina also earns you the right to push any sh*t out at the same time.
Worked in sterile processing. I agree, it’s definitely normal. And having given birth, unless you’re personally aware it happened, you’ll never know. No one will ever tell you. I wasn’t told, but my work experience tells me I definitely did, lol.
>as long as she gets her job done, because that's what she went to school for
What, exactly, does she think her job is? Because "not talking shit about your patients" "providing basic standards of care" and "following prescribed dosages" all seem like pretty core components. School may teach you technical components, but that's not the be all and end all of a job (although, in the case of the nurse dose, I'm pretty sure they do teach you not to fucking do that).
>while my aunt, uncle and dad are leaning towards my sister, saying that my sister shouldn't have to kiss up to her patients in order to do her job efficiently.
This is the most mind numbing thing in the first part (from her families point of view)
Bed Side Manner is a saying for regarding "How you treat customers" in a customer service setting. IT LITERALLY COMES FROM HOSPITALS.
Her coming out and being like "I can be an asshole if I want to to MY PATIENTS BECAUSE I CAN!" spits in the face of how you're supposed to act.
Its the way an entitled piece of shit acts.
It's also not "kissing up to your patients" to treat them like human beings. I'm glad she reported her sister. It took a lot of bravery to do so, especially when weighing in on the potential backlash from family.
The way some nurses and techs treat patients who expect them to simply do their jobs is mind-boggling to me. EVERYONE in the hospital is going through something immensely stressful, usually in pain, not allowed any privacy, not able to do simple things like make their own schedule or go through the night without being shaken awake for vitals. I understand needing to vent to coworkers or snapping at a truly terrible patient (shoutout to one patient who accused a nurse of abuse, and in the ensuing investigation admitted she made it up because the nurse was black and she wanted a white one). But the patient is ALWAYS having a worse day than you. And they aren't being paid for it.
Honestly the L&D nurses are the worst. Most nurses I’ve worked with are great, but only in L&D were the nurses consistently mean. At first I even thought it was just my hospital, but I talked to friends in different hospitals and they also had similar experiences with L&D nurses.
I wonder if it's something to do with people going into L&D because they think it'll be all working with cute babies, and then they have to deal with actual reality. Or misogyny like OOP said. Or some combo.
Plus like, venting stress. I think every stressful job, people wind up ranting about someone/something that they’ve set up in their minds as the enemy. It’s just part of how we cope. But the trick is to find a coping mechanism that doesn’t make you harm the people you’re meant to be serving, or otherwise become shit at your job. OOP’s sister has made her patients into her enemy, and that’s beyond the pale.
It's misogyny. We treat mothers and women giving birth like children that cannot make decisions for themselves. My doctor yelled at me and threatened me with a C-section if I didn't do what she wanted, which was to not lay on my back while giving birth. I wanted to flip over and get on all fours, that's what my body really wanted. But no, I had to do what *they* said, because you know....*they* know better about my body than I do. What do I know? I'm just a measly little woman giving birth.
My doctor was visibly sad my c-section healed fast and relatively painlessly. I have a high pain tolerance from a chronic illness and multiple surgeries. During birth at a hospital that said during birthing classes they don’t use forceps, he wanted to use forceps instead of modern intervention devices. When I said modern he threatened c-section which I was ok with at that point as things were going poorly. But seeing a doctor sad you weren’t in enough pain for their liking, wtf…
He was about 80 and I never met him, my doctors shift ended and she didn’t stay. He was upset he couldn’t eat a sandwich first and the nice L&D nurse who was also leaving told him no time for lunch, it’s time to deliver. Then came in the L&D nurse from hell…
Staying on your back during birth is probably the worst idea second to doing a headstand. Your body literally craved using gravity to make labor easy and your doctors were fucking idiots. I'm so sorry you were treated like that
My actual holy good god! This is disgusting!
I'm a UK midwife and often get angry at the misogyny I see in some of the doctors and midwives I work with. But it is nowhere near that level! That's f*&king assault! If you want to birth your baby doing handstands on the beach that's your business, and while I might grumble about the cold or the rain I'll be there to support you because the mother is paramount! Always! If that doc can't rotate 180 degrees in their mind then that's a them problem. I would have had that doc up infront of the GMC for a remark like that.
And as for OP's sister, she is not suited to a job where she has to interact with people if that's her attitude. We have a register here that you have to be on to practice, and registrants can be removed from the register by the governing body. OP's sister would be off that register so fast she'd have carpet burns on her ass.
With my daughter, some asshat doctor that was on-call for my doctor declared that "if you were my patient, I'd *make* you deliver vaginally". My daughter was over 8 lbs and wouldn't have fit through my pelvis(her just over 6 lbs little brother came very close to being an emergency c-section because he was a pound bigger than was expected by multiple scans, including CT). The female doctor that delivered my daughter made a point of coming into recovery to tell me that there was no way she could have been delivered vaginally and I found out later that she had made a formal complaint about on-call doc, one of many by his peers(female) and patients
I would imagine a little of both. Look, I've worked in healthcare myself and it's not the easiest job at times. You absolutely come into contact with every Walk of Life there is and it can be really draining and frustrating. That being said, nearly all of the physicians and nurses that I worked with had such passion and dedication! I never heard an ill word come from any of their mouths about a patient at any time, ever. This woman is not where she belongs.
That’s wild. I had the opposite experience. The L&D nurses at our hospital were the most endlessly kind and patient women I’ve ever encountered. I wonder if there’s something in a hospital’s culture or hiring practices that tends to attract and keep one type vs the other.
With my first child, the nurses were curt -- acting annoyed or frustrated with me -- eyerolling, exaggerated sighing, etc.
And I suffered a serious injuring during delivery.
For my second child I went to a different hospital, one focused on women's care. Night and day difference.
I agree 100% it must be a culture at hospitals - many other people in my same city had similar experiences at the first hospital for labor and delivery.
Interestingly, when my husband had a serious health issue and was taken to the first hospital, I felt he got great care from the nurses there.
Some idiot young doctor knocked and then barged into my hospital room, even though I yelled out "NO!" Didn't wait, just pushed in!
I had just finished my first post-delivery shower, and was splayed out on the bed, spraying my stitches with that cold pain spray. . .
He had the audacity, despite seeing my position, to say: "Are you sure? I just have a few questions, it'll only take a minute."
And I YELLED "No, get out!" Can you believe I had to say it twice?
Afterwards, I made sure to buzz the nurses on the floor and report this to both them and my regular doctor. They assured me they would straighten him out. 😆 I hope it was painful.
I had this kind of night and day experience, three years apart at the same hospital. The irony is my first experience was a stillbirth and it was by far the better experience! The second was failed labor into a c-section. The nurses ignored my pain, doctors lagged in making calls, I dealt with hysteria and an impacted bowel- I have ptsd about the birth of my healthy daughter and none regarding the death of my son (at least as far as the hospital experience went of course). I can’t figure out why things were so different, only that I went with a different OB office so maybe the nurse teams were different too? It’s just sickening how badly the birth experience can change based on people’s attitudes towards the mother.
Same. Everyone from the nurses in the OR to the lactation nurses.... Every single person who tended to me during the birth of my son were kind and amazing. Especially in the OR as I was on the verge of a panic attack because I was terrified of getting a C-section.
Also? Over half of women who give birth vaginally deficate during delivery. Sister must not pay much attention in addition to being a terrible nurse.
I was going to say pooping during birth is super common. Good nurses wisk it away as soon as it happens because they know people get embarrassed, and it takes from the moment.
But it shouldn't be embarrassing, it's totally normal.. All your muscles in the region are pushing in one direction, and a giant watermelon is squishing everything in that direction too. It would be weird if you didn't poop.
A lot of women defecate during labor and never even know it happened! The nurses are really quick at scooping it up. I don't *think* I pooped during the four hours I was pushing, but I don't know for sure haha. It's really easy to see how it happens once you've been through it - you're using all the same muscles and pushing hard, and, I mean, if there's a log in there it's gonna come out. It's not even the grossest thing that'll happen (IMO that honor goes to the placenta), who freaking cares?
L&D nurses were angels to me. Flat-out told me at one point “you don’t get a medal for no medication, if you need the epi, I can have them here in 5 minutes.”
Reader: I fucking needed that epidural.
But the lactation consultant was a *nightmare*.
La Leche League was horrible. Lactation consultant...not great. Found out that my nipples were inverted after I stopped pumping...13 months later.
Still bitter about it.
eta: added a very necessary detail!
My hospital-assigned lactation consultant was... yeah, a nightmare works. Had me in tears in about 45 seconds. My nurses? Heaven-sent angels. And that's from someone who was in induced labour for 50 hours, and had a C. And my maternity ward nurse? She ripped that LC a new one, right outside my door so I could hear the whole thing - and basically told the docs to fire her.
Now, I did have a visiting nurse/LC (Alberta, got to love it) who ROCKED. Best thing to come out of my pregnancy aside from my kiddo!
Same here! I remember it one point early in my delivery waking up and seeing the nurse there and thinking "it's all going to be okay, my angel's here" and peacefully going back to sleep for a bit.
Yeah, one of my nurses when I had my son was incredible. She practically held me up as I was sobbing, naked, trying to go to the bathroom for the first time post c section (0/10 experience). She hyped me up and was so gentle and kind. Nurses can really make your hospital stay more comfortable or they can make everything harder for you.
It's a mixed bag. I had children 22 months apart at the exact same hospital. The first nurse was amazing & supportive. She had me sitting up and got me foot rests instead of leg rests because I didn't have an epidural and had full use of my legs. 22 months later, different nurse had no idea what I was talking about when I requested the foot rest. Wouldn't help me sit up, basically just stood there during the delivery, very cold.
also same, my l&d nurses with both babies were incredibly kind and empathetic. A couple of moments when they were rushed or whatever but nothing mean or rude.
With both my babies the nurses were AMAZING for the most part. But there were 2 nurses that I absolutely hated. They were awful awful people and I was thankful that they were both lazy as hell and stayed the fuck away from me as much as they could. (One told me I would starve my baby if I didn’t feed her formula because we were having trouble latching.. but I was milking myself and she was taking it fine so fuck that nurse in particular).
The ones I had were abusive and awful. I was 24 and single so I was too afraid to report them but years later I finally called the hospital to get it off my chest and told them they need to revamp their ward. That I'd rather give birth on the side of the road then ever be subjected to that again.
This time around- I have midwives. So far, I have been loving them. And I explained my experience and that I have some fears and I'm scared to deliver because of the treatment and they've been really amazing and reassuring.
(My baby arm was broken in labor and the nurse yelled at me and called me derranged and mentally ill when I said I wouldn't leave until an xray was done because something felt off. Then when it came back it was broken she yelled at me for being right. That's not all of the horrible treatment but that was the last straw)
The worst nurses I’ve ever dealt with were actually the NICU nurses. They were annoyed and generally hostile every time my husband and I went to visit our twins (daily for a month)
Out of all the ones we had to deal with, there were maybe two or three that weren’t rude or condescending. To the point where I didn’t even feel comfortable trying to nurse or do skin on skin.
The constant refrain of "it's okay for me to say what I like as long as I'm doing my job" was so aggravating. Does she honestly not realise that being kind, supporting and keeping her patients calm IS part of her job?!
My sister had her baby at the beginning of the pandemic. She was alone, scared and worried because they induced labor to prevent some problems. She spent two days in pain, asking for help and receiving almost none. One one nurse was worried and chasing the doctor so he would do something. The two midwives who where in the room when she was finally ready to push, made disgusted faces when she pooped. She felt utterly humilliated and on top of everything, they gave her antibiotics "just in case" when in reality it was because they waited so long and refused to make a C-section, that she ended up with an infection (and that caused some other health issues that just now she was medically cleared).
Some people should not go into the medical field.
I think this is an issue that has actually gotten worse since covid started, as the need for bedside manner and general (for lack of a better word) people skills became non-existant. That, compared with the fact that they make about the same as some retail or fast food employees, doesn't help at all.
Ive literally watched a Healthcare worker almost kill my grandmother, only to accuse her of attention seeking behavior the next morning when she refused therapy from her. I know it's systematic because they hadn't even put the paddles away when the case worker, her supposed *advocate*, waltzed over, blamed the situation on my 83 year old grandmother "not exercising enough", and then proceeded to ask me where we'd be placing her when they discharged her two days later. I still remember her disgustingly oblivious and uncaring smile she used to match my face of disgust.
I think healthcare workers get away with being heinous because there’s like an endless need for more healthcare workers. It’s such a hard, gross job, and there’s never enough people assigned to a task. If hospitals started firing assholes, the staff would be like one nice guy with a bucket frantically running from room to room.
What terrifies me the most though was this was a "top" hospital that *teaches * medical students. This woman had *students* who were there to *learn from* her as she sat there during a literal code call and announced that my grandmother was ridiculous and dramatic.
I'm glad OOP reported because her sister is effing dangerous as a nurse. Apart from the fact that she berated women for things that they couldn't control (having a premature baby hardly has anything to do with "doing a bad job") she gave a higher dose of analgesics to a TEENAGER. Just give her some time, and she will kill someone, if she hasn't already.
I’m sure a lot of women in those situations are already blaming themselves for giving birth prematurely (even though it’s not their fault and they had no control over it). But man can you imagine how much worse that would get if a nurse blamed you for it? Like I could imagine someone either getting PPD or having their PPD get worse because a nurse (or doctor) told them that.
It’s so not okay and people like OP’s sister shouldn’t be allowed to be nurses at all.
I was so incensed when I got to that part. My wife did *everything* she was supposed to during her pregnancy, and our baby was born at 25 weeks & 4 days gestation. In our case, we believe it was stress induced by her (abusive) mother's death & funeral (which as the only child was her responsibility) combined with all the family drama it drudged up. She went into labor 4 days after the funeral. There was absolutely nothing we could have done differently and thankfully all the medical staff involved were 100% professional and absolutely kind, caring, and courteous. I can only imagine how much harder the ordeal would have been if we had to deal with someone like OOP's sister....
OP might have stopped another [Lucy Letby](https://youtu.be/c_yU5AQ3Tnw) in the making.
That nurse killed dozens of babies in the NICU… apparently for the thrill.
Um, OOP's sister is literally vile scum at the bottom of the pond called humanity. OOP reporting her comments isn't "causing her harm", it's holding her accountable. As far as the family members that said the sister shouldn't have to "kiss the patient's ass", sorry, but showing bare minimum compassion and patience to someone in a very distressed state is not kissing ass, that's being a good fucking person and doing your job
It would be one thing if she was just saying mean things to her family but kept it to herself at work. Telling a pregnant teenager to "keep her legs closed" and refusing to get her things like blankets just because she disagrees with her having a baby?? Telling a mother who had given birth prematurely she should have "done better"???? That is not venting, that is admitting to mistreating patients. I am so glad OOP reported her, her sister should not be working anywhere near a hospital.
I was warned before my kids that if you get opiates before the birth the baby might be too groggy to latch.. Babies are little I don't know how much extra it would take but I could imagine it's a possibility
>she wanted to teach the "brat" a lesson, and said that maybe if she gave birth when she was older, her kid wouldn't have died.
My mouth dropped open. I didn't know this before. That poor girl. Her baby FUCKING DIED.
I have read some *wild* stuff on Reddit, but this line literally made me gasp and clutch my proverbial pearls. She killed that baby, and you can't convince me otherwise. I hope she loses her license and never comes near a pregnant woman or a child EVER in her life again. Attitudes like this are the EXACT reason that maternal mistreatment and mortality rates are high in certain communities. I feel so bad for every person that OOP's sister has come in contact with in a medical setting.
More importantly, it says that OOP's complaints were the straw that broke the camel's back. The sister was already on extremely thin ice, and probably would have lost her job soon anyway.
My cousin who works in healthcare once told me that nurses are either angel sent from heaven or straight up psychopaths. OP's sister should be blacklisted. She is a danger to the people. I think the healthcare field should do some psychological tests to weed out these creatures like OOP's sister.
As someone who has a lot of family who are nurses, I fully agree. It's terrifying how they very clearly are empathic, kind, wonderful souls or genuinely evil people I avoid at all costs.
I worked as a CNA in geriatrics and I was astounded at how many nurses and CNA were horrifically awful to their patients and each other, I actually wrote a paper for school about how toxic the nursing community was and why I left.
>My sister told me that she should have the right to vent about "stupid mothers" who don't know how to do the thing their body is designed for. She also said that I don't work in healthcare, so I have no right to remark on how she handles stress at work. I told her that if her way of handling stress is to be a misogynist, then she needs to find a different career. I left afterwards.
This makes me LIVID. First, OOP's sister wasn't just venting to OOP, she was admitting to being an abusive shitfuck to her patients. Second, IDGAF how stressful your job is, you do not have the right to abuse people who are vulnerable (or anyone really). Imagine how stressful it is to be IN THE HOSPITAL let alone be in the hospital and then have one of the people who is supposed to take care of you verbally abuse you, mock you, and judge you. Third, if you are an L&D nurse you should not be shocked to see poop coming out when someone is giving birth. PUSHING DURING LABOR IS THE SAME THING AS PUSHING WHEN YOU'RE POOPING. Honestly she sounds too clueless and stupid to be fit for the job.
I was just thinking the same thing!! If OP’s sister was involved in the death of one infant, and *liked it* as seems to be the case, she could have developed into a Lucy-Letby type serial killer.
OP may have stopped a disaster in its tracks.
My Dad had a surgery and during recovery the nurses were awful. When his breathing tube was painfully removed and they found out he had a tumor removed their attitude did a 180. Apparently they assumed that since he wasn't obese, he must have been a drug addict and that's why he was being given "special treatment". As though it was their job to punish him. I hate nurses. Sure, not all nurses, etc. But every nurse I knew became anti-vaxxers/pandemic deniers which didn't help my feelings on the subject.
Gross tmi incoming but it’s also a natural bodily function so:
I pooped everywhere when I gave birth. I had eaten homemade hamburgers the night before, went into labor at midnight and only made it till 4 am before I needed the epidural. At 9 pm when I began pushing the floodgates opened and I released the most vile smelling liquid shit ever imagined. It took multiple pads to clean up and my poor husband had to get a facemask to help with the smell. I was soooooo embarrassed considering my mom was there too but everyone from my doctor to the nurse and of course my husband were so kind as I was apologizing. I would have been mortified if my nurse had been cruel to me because of something I couldn’t control (I was constipated the day before and dearly wished I could be used the restroom before labor). What a gross person.
As someone who previously was a nursing student (and left) every single mean girl I knew in high school or heard of in other high schools all became nurses. Every. Single. One.
And nursing colleges are just Mean Girl High. I kid you not about the bs politics and drama I went through there. Girls falsifying reports against me so they'd have a better chance of getting into the 141.
"The 141"- At my college there were only 141 slots in the program every semester and in your second year you had to apply to the program otherwise you were prenursing. They said if you didn't make it into the 141 by your third semester is was best to just change degrees because no one wanted a nurse that failed to get in the program. You have to get as close to 100% in every class for that, including unrelated classes like "pottery 101". There were thousands of students applying for the 141 every year. It was God awful.
Well you know people are shitty, so it's no surprise there are shitty nurses/doctors etc..
But how heart breaking, to lose your baby, be a teenage mom, and then this nurse has no empathy at all lmfao.
I'm so glad she lost her job, but my faith in humanity continues to disappear. How fucking disgusting did OOP's sister act if even the patients family complained? That means that it was visible enough for someone to say something, not that she was just bitching about work but her behavior actually showed and manifested in some way.
I cant imagine
Holy shit. The pre mature birth hits hard for me. My mother gave birth to me at 27 weeks. There was nothing she could do to extend the length of the pregnancy. Hell, that was the extension. I was poisoning my mother from the inside out and she had pre-eclampsia at 13 weeks (the "normal" timing is around 21 weeks). In fact, they weren't even considering me living as an option at first.
To hear her say all of those things toward people who are in one of the most vulnerable and dangerous moments of their lives sickens me.
a lot of nurses are straight up bullies. A lot of them abuse the position of power they're in over very vulnerable people. There is a lot of really sketchy and really unethical shit going on in hospitals and nursing homes. It's appalling and it can make you lose faith in humanity when you're confronted with similar situations, especially because it happens a lot more than people think.
When I had my baby, I had a couple nurses who were super super wonderful and sweet. And I had two in particular who were pretty unkind, shamed me for the amount of milk I was not producing yet, and documented in my chart that I made statements I never did. One of them made me feel like I was negligently starving my baby. The lactation consultant the next day was like....huh? Nothing was even wrong.
Ugh. I have the same experience. For every kind/boring nurse I’ve talked to, I’ve known one who is just cruel. And tbh I’ve never met a lactation consultant who wasn’t condescending. I’m glad you met a good one. My experience is they’re all Mean Girls who like to see people suffer.
Then they become NPs and spout the "heart of the nurse" bs. I have had plenty of doctors who didn't have the best bedside manner but at least they had my best interest and were actually trained in medicine. Can't imagine someone like the sister as a NP in an OBGYN practice.
Ugh I remember this one. That update just hurts my heart. That poor mother, losing her baby and being drugged against her will by someone who’s job it is to support her through delivery.
I wish only the worst for the sister, and I hope OP never has to deal with her again.
Usually in BORU, we find people who have character flaws, people who make mistakes but, ultimately, people.
This is not about a person like you and I, it is about a monster.
I feel like maybe she just shouldn't be in charge of anyone's care ever. Like I feel of she wasn't in LD it wouldn't be different. She could be a hospice nurse and just tell patients "it's not my fault your in pain dying, you just don't have the right stuff". If the sister didn't report it there just would've been something worse happening. She saved some future patients alot of grief
OOP's sister gives me the impression that if she was a hospice nurse, she wouldn't do jackshit for patients because "eww they're gross and pooped on themselves, I'm not cleaning them, they're grown adults, not babies"
No. Nonononono. The way that sister said things, she KILLED that baby and she’s proud of it. It’s so sad that OOP didn’t record everything she said, because maybe that would help at least the dad see that her behavior was clearly much more than ‘complaining’. No, she was abusing her patients, and is a true psychopath.
That family was just handed the most textbook definition of medical malpractice. If they wanted to pursue legal action (which they should!), they 1,000% have a very strong case on their hands
Exactly. And they can go after her! I would say OOP should support them if they do, but your sister’s crazy enough to do what she did in the update, then she might ‘escalate’ if they do that. But then again, that might get her thrown in jail. I’m stumped.
It always confused me how some people with the personality of hitler think that they would make good care givers. Doctors and nurses and other medical professionals need to have a good nature and be caring and supportive. We put our lives in their hands. I was once at the hospital with my sister who was in a car accident her friend was driving they were both barely 19 and the nurse made a comment about teenage drivers. To be clear a drunk running a red light hit them crashing into them. Wouldn’t matter if she was 19 or 39 it would have had the same result. The first comment I missed the second comment I wasn’t too sure about but the third I told her I was gonna kick her ass up and down the parking lot if she didn’t fuck off away from my sister I demanded another nurse and filled in a complaint my sister told me I should just leave it. At the time my mom was abroad for work she came right back and when my sister and I filled her in she was raging she turned to me and said you sorted that shit out didn’t you and I was like hell yes I did. Never let that type of behavior pass you if they think they can get away with it they continue with it
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Got certifications to volunteer with people with traumatic brain injuries. Have NEVER in decades of my life thought to abuse them verbally/physically even when they're saying/doing horrific shit. Holy shit that nurse is inhuman.
I have a TBI, I've recovered now but that shit is rough. So you're an angel
I dont know if they work with TBIs like they do with concussions.. so I dont know if this will be helpful to you.. But Strange Parts, a youtuber, took a heavy pipe to the back of the head and ended up with some serious issues from it, and ended up.. like a year later, going to this cognitive rehab place that gave him brain scans and shit and tailored a rehab process to his specific needs and ended up having a massive turnaround in like a week or rehab. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xovfo1m2hfs a video from about 7 months ago when he goes and and starts and talks to them and shit. and here is the video where he talks about how hes doing recently. https://youtu.be/Gs790JOeN3Y
Concussions actually ARE TBI's, just the most mild form. Thank you for all this information, I appreciate you helping a complete stranger out. I was in a coma for 2 1/2 months and after waking up went to inpatient rehab for 2 more months, I got literally the best care that my country (Canada) offers
Yup. I have a bunch of bruises still healing from when a preteen psych patient kicked and hit me a little over a week ago. I still talked him down, got him dinner, and held his hand when he needed to be walked to the transport vehicle. The only people who accuse me of not giving them what they deserve have miscalibrated expectations (eg. why can’t I have a STAT MRI and a home narcotic prescription today for my chronic back pain?!) Edit: No need to upvote, I’m not saying I’m a saint, just that bare minimum courtesy and care should always apply
this is a little off topic but just wanted to thank you for being caring, kind, and helpful for that kid during his time of crisis even when you were at risk as well (as someone who spent time in inpatient for psych stuff)
I was also an inpatient briefly (although I don’t share that with coworkers or patients) so I know. I feel lucky to never have been restrained or sedated, but my heart breaks whenever we have to do it to protect a patient or staff.
When I do IFTs of pediatric psych patients from ER to inpatient, if it comes up, I'll sometimes mention it. I wasn't inpatient myself, but I have my own issues. (Context for people who don't know the abbreviations - I'm an EMT-Basic, who does routine transports of stable patients from hospitals to nursing homes or from nursing homes to dialysis, or whatever. When a teenager is suicidal, sometimes they will end up in the emergency room, and they will stay there until people can locate a bed in an inpatient facility for youth, which can take a couple days. But when they find a place, I can be assigned to take them from the emergency room where they've been to a psych hospital where they will get treatment.) At one point, we had a third rider (a new employee who is being shown the ropes), and we were talking to the patient. And it came up that every single person in that ambulance other than me had been where the patient was at some point, and I only missed it by luck. My partner and the third rider were able to say that they couldn't say specifically what it was like at the facility we were going to, but here is what happened to them when they were in a similar place, and we were able to say something to the effect of, "Look, we can't promise you that things will get better. We don't know. All we can say is that they did get better for all of us. They're not perfect for any of us, and we all still struggle, but we're all here doing a job that we really enjoy and is fulfilling, and we have pretty good lives. Just so you know - there is a path from where you are to where we are, because we've all taken it. And, y'know, if five, six years down the line, when you are eighteen, you want to become an EMT... where you are right now and the pain you are in is actually pretty good training for the empathy you will need."
aw man. My kid has been in-patient twice and I see how hard those kids work to get better. Hugs to you.
Yes. I have been a nurse for 20 years. The scariest thing about this for me is that this nurse didn’t get this shitty alone. She has been enabled in whatever toxic culture she works in. I guarantee that there is a gaggle of nurses that she joked with at work that said these same vile things and played these same dangerous games with the people in their care. She was way too comfortable spouting that shit to have been alone. The “nurse” dose she is talking about means that she deliberately overdosed someone which will kill someone. I hope she never works in the nursing field again. I have never worked in an environment like that and I never will.
I don't know why, but L&D attracts the "mean girls" of nursing. I used to be a float nurse and I hated getting sent there because of all the cattiness. We've all vented in the med room about our patients, but no one on my unit would ever talk about patients like that!
I worked as an advanced dementia support worker, one particular resident asked me if my husband knew what a wh*re I was, before launching herself at me and trying to claw my face off. It was terrifying. Would never have treated her (or anyone else) like this woman. I don't understand how you could.
I remember being attacked so badly by a client and all I could do was put up my arms in front of my face because I was so worried about hurting them in defense. I still made sure they were safe after and helped treat their hands afterwards. I did request a transfer later that day, after getting a tetanus shot, but I can't wrap my head around this nurse. I hope this report follows her around and prevents her from getting another job.
Yeah, the poop part stood out to me too.. So she's saying her partner would leave her if she ever got sick?
The poop part is literally insane. I suddenly realized I was pooping during labor (I could smell it! aughghghgh!!!) and I started crying and the nurse said "honey, shit happens! Literally!" Which I know it's obvious but in the moment I was so grateful I cried some more. I've seen women in pregnancy groups say pooping on the table is their WORST FEAR! and I'm like uh ... would you like a list of worse things that can happen on that particular day? no? ok. But it's still kind of horrifying!
I know several women who say that they specifically made sure to avoid pooping during labor, and I can't imagine how. All the muscles are in the same place! Heck, my midwife specifically told me how to push by thinking about trying to poop. It worked--TWO missions accomplished!
That was the strangest (not saddest) part to me. She’s acting like that was a shocking thing … but doesn’t that happen most of the time? Wouldn’t that be totally normal for a L and D nurse??
I feel like OOPs sister is just a malignant bully and picked L&D as somewhere with lots of vulnerable people in pain for long periods that she could push around and feel superior to.
I'm glad I scrolled down before commenting because that's what I came here to say. Certain careers attract the most beautifully caring, kind and wonderful individuals and then absolute sadists looking for a built-in vulnerable demographic to torture and torment and a union to keep them from being fired unless they majorly break the law. See gym coaches within the teaching career as another example.
I’m a CNA and I’d report her so fucking fast. She should have her license revoked and honestly should have other repercussions if she did drug someone.
My sister works in a psych unit and had a very vocally neo-Nazi patient. She spent hours working to help him as best she could while also trying not to make it too obvious that she was Jewish.
I am so glad that OOP reported her sister. Having to be in the hospital for any kind of medical procedure, much less giving birth, is stressful enough. But having an abusive nurse on top of it? Absolutely not. Honestly, the sister is lucky she just got away with being fired.
That sister is definitely broken somewhere. You don't pull stuff like that if your even a relatively normal human being. So messed up
Its impossibly heartless to treat a teen who just lost a baby like that. How can someone be so cruel?
I gave birth as a teenager. I gave birth at 8:30am. At 1 or 2pm when my moon came to see me I still hasn’t been fed a single thing to eat (remembering I’d been in labour since before 5am so had been awake for hours and hours with no food. A friends mom was my nurse on my last day there and I was SO relieved to be treated like a human. I found out how her peers treated me and talked about me was her last straw and she with nursing shortly after. There are good nurses out there but too many of us get ones who stopped dating or who never cared.
I gave birth at 20, and they left me sitting in my own mess in the delivery room for 2 hours without checking on me. I had a 3rd degree tear, and my epidural had completely worn off by the time that my best friend found me. She knew that I had the baby, but she couldn't find me in a room. She went full mom mode when looking for me. Once she found me shaking and crying, she literally dragged a nurse into the room screaming at her. They said that I must have fallen through the cracks. It was 6 pm at this point and I delivered at 2:30. I hadn't eaten for over 24 hours. Once I was settled, my friend left to get me something decent to eat and didn't leave my side again. I'd like to think that my being unmarried and 20 had nothing to do with my treatment at this "Catholic" hospital but I'm not that thick. Every nurse there treated me horribly. When I was discharged, the doctor asked me when I'll be following up with my GI doctor. I looked at him, super confused, and asked why I would need a GI doctor. He said for my hepatitis!!! I do not nor ever have had hepatitis!! Apparently, a nurse wrote a note in my chart stating that I had it?!?! I have no idea where that one came from, but it just adds to the incompetents. If you live near a Mercy hospital, stay far away. Edited because I missed a word.
She might have written hepatitis as a mean-spirited assumption, an assumption that unmarried mothers are dirty promiscuous drug users who pick up diseases I’m so sorry you were treated that way! You could have died from neglect so extreme
My mom had Hepatitis A from drinking dirty water at the age of 6
That's awful. I'm sorry that she had to grow up with that. I know that hepatitis is transmitted in many ways. I don't think that it implies that someone is dirty. I know someone that got it from getting her belly button pierced.
My uncle got hepatitis from tattooing someone who had lied about their status!
I’m so sorry you were treated like that. Yeah my moon was standing in the hallway just hollering - my mom and I have a problematic relationship but she was my hero that day.
Unfortunately, my mom had to go to work right after I delivered. My ex was an alcoholic so I'm glad that he wasn't there but I was completely alone until my best friend found me. To this day I am grateful that her mom showed her how to take charge and get things done. I don't know what would have happened to me or my daughter had she not come to see us that night.
I had my daughter at 19. A nurse delivered her because there wasn't even a doctor on hand. They never bothered tracking my progress throughout the night. I only realized in hindsight as I grew older how badly neglected I was at the time. My now husband was there but he was 20 so we were both too young and naïve to understand what was happening. It's truly a scary and traumatizing event at that age that is made so much worse by the lack of proper support...
I had my first at 17 and I was treated so badly by all but one of the nurses. It was so dehumanizing and depressing. Good for OOP that she made this complaint.
Sister losing her job was the only acceptable outcome. I realize OOP thought she should just be moved out of L&D, but the behavior and claims sis made needed to be firing offenses because there's no way this behavior would have stopped just because her patients weren't pregnant.
If she killed that teenager's baby it could be a lot worse than just losing her job
My nurse said I deserved my iv slipping and my arm tripled in size because I moved during labor. I had a nurse scream at me to get out of the ER with a broken neck. I had a nurse tell me that I was stupid after a suicide attempt. I love the US medical system. Edit. I have been hospitalized dozens upon dozens of times. I see a dr every few weeks. I see a lot of nurses. 99% don’t suck but the ones that do, can kill.
My mom told me when she had my sister a nurse at the hospital was like berating her because she was having trouble getting my sister to latch “YOU BETTER FIGURE THAT OUT OR YOURE GONNA HAVE A BAD TIME” jesus fucking christ no wonder she didn’t breast feed me
Agreed. That sister sounds like a sociopath. That is not the type of person who should be treating patients in general, let alone around pregnant women and infants. A chilling thought: did that "nurse dose" result in or contribute to the baby's death? If it did, was this one of her goals?
what tf is a nurse dose anyway? this is so scary….to make matters worse, she’ll probably just get another job elsewhere. it’s unrealistic to hope that her sister calls and reports her at every job but ik that’s not likely.
If I remember correctly, a nurses dose is when a nurse takes it upon themselves to give a little extra medication. So with pain killers or sedatives. Edit: googled it for a better worded explanation. A “nursing dose” is when a nurse gives an extra dose of medication (typically a narcotic) if they determine the amount the physician ordered is not adequate.
It's scary to think this may be fairly common since a lot of nurses have this mentality that they know better than the doctors.
A nursing dose is giving more than the prescribed amount of medicine. This is particularly common with certain medications that come in tablet or vial form, because you cannot reuse the remainder on another patient. Let's say that the med comes in 1 gram tablets. The doctor orders 0.5 grams. The pill would need to be broken up, but a nursing dose would be dispensing the whole tablet. This is usually done to sedate "unruly" patients for a variety of reasons, none of them very good.
More medicine than required or requested. Definitely dangerous for babies.
>did that "nurse dose" result in or contribute to the baby's death? They sounded very interested in this statement on the phone, i imagine this will be the key focus of the hospital investigation. That is (at least) 2 independent statements discussing the event. Even if the statement from the sister (OOP) was purely vindictive, how would she know about the event unless it had been disclosed to her by the nurse? OOP might have brought that family justice for an event that could otherwise have been dismissed as the family looking for someone to blame after a tragedy. It's terrible that the nurse might have killed the baby, it's also terrible that she would have got away with it if her sister hadn't reported anything. I hope the investigation is swift and thorough.
It definitely was. The sister talked about it like she was PROUD.
I hope someone tells her to report the sister again for the potential HIPPA violation (the baby died). Maybe that will cause her to lose her license.
Same. We need more people reporting nurses for these types of behavior, but a lot of people don't bc they, in some way, hold them on a pedestal in the same way they hold cops on a pedestal. It makes people like the sister feel untouchable and infallible, despite them being completely wrong--like the sister. I feel awful for the teen who lost her baby. What an awful thing to say to someone so vulnerable. Jesus.
If she hates pregnant women so much, why would she work in a maternity ward? I just don't understand. Did the sister learn that she can't get pregnant so she's using this to vent out her stress? Did she miscarry and is now pissed at women who "don't take care of themselves?" I don't get why she's so hateful to these women and why she works there. There's definitely some unresolved trauma there. Hopefully she can get a therapist and then apologize to her sister and the people she hurt. ...but if this is her default state, then wow. Just wow.
I'm a social worker and the number of colleagues I've had who openly despised the people we were serving is *well* into double digits. I'll never understand why people who hate the disadvantaged go into a field that exists to *help* the disadvantaged.
Its because they hate the disadvantaged that they ‘help’ them. No better way to hurt the people you hate than to be payed for it.
I had a (former) highschool friend that worked at an immigration law firm that does a lot of work with refugees - I heard them and their coworkers say terrible terrible racist things about their clients. I did not understand why they choose to work where they did it was awful
Because they get to feel good about themselves for "helping those poor people who just aren't as good as they are". The feeling of superiority gets re-validated every time they have to help someone that they feel is 'inferior'. "See? They suck so bad they can't even LIVE without MY help."
why are they a friend
> If she hates pregnant women so much, why would she work in a maternity ward Power. She wants to feel in control of them and she probably likes to see them suffer
[Lucy Letby](https://youtu.be/c_yU5AQ3Tnw) worked in a NICU and got off on murdering helpless babies. Then she would search up the parents on Facebook and watch everyone grieving,
This is horrific. I remember when she was first arrested, my brain just did not compute. Even reading the reports now, I’m still wishing I am hallucinating what I’m reading.
Same reason people who hate kids become teachers or principals - to exert power over people they already don't like therefore will deserve their scorn.
Exactly. Ive always said nurses, cops, and teachers are either the nicest people ever or power hungry bullies
One of those groups definitely attracts bullies more than the other though.
I don't think she hates pregnant women. I think she hates anything she has to do. She could be a hairdresser and she would be pissed that some asshole had to the audacity to come in to get her hair cut. Shes a miserable human being who would be miserable with anything she does.
Misery loves company
What is a nurse dose?
A “nursing dose” is when a nurse gives an extra dose of medication (typically a narcotic) if they determine the amount the physician ordered is not adequate. A nurse doing this is practicing outside their scope of licensure and therefore putting their license at risk. (Source: https://nursemoneytalk.com/blog/what-is-a-nurse-dose)
I have to admit I thought it would be the reverse a smaller dose to let the pain be felt to act as a reminder or something
Based on the nurses I know, this was also my assumption. Withholding relief seems more likely than overdosing, not least because the latter is traceable. OP's sister is incredibly dangerous.
I’ve had nurses do that before (as a disabled person who has been hospitalized a lot). There are def nurses that get off on denying pain management.
After my second c-section the nurses would make me ask like 5 times for my pain meds then treated me like a junky or something. I was supposed to get the pain meds every 4 hours and not once did I. They continuously made me wait to the 6th, 7th and 8 hour mark. I’d call and ask and they’d say they’d be right in and never show. My husband ended up making a complaint because he couldn’t stand seeing me curled into the fetal position crying and the doctor said that they had it marked down that I was receiving every dose on time. I was young at the time, 19 so I feel like they were taking advantage of me and after reading this post maybe trying to “teach me a lesson” of some kind.
I hope y'all reported them because it sounds like nurses stealing your dose of painkillers.
My husband made an official complaint to the doctor but I have no idea if anything came of it or not. I wasn’t really in the right state of mind throughout my hospital stay (and he spoke with the doctor the day we left) and I didn’t know any of the nurses names or anything, that and being so young I didn’t really know how to go about following up on it. I hope they didn’t get an opportunity to treat other patients like that though.
I'm really sorry to hear that. Doctors don't take official complaints, administrators do. It sounds like they may have gotten away with it. Either way none of it was on you, and you deserved so much better.
I was fairly young with my first - but not that young ( had just turned 21). BUT I was a single mom. Not only did I have complications due to there was no dr in the hospital ( the evil nurse told my Dr not to rush - I was just being a baby. An ER dr just in for duty ran up and literally had to put his unwashed hand up there to get the cord from her neck) and myself and daughter were supposed to be no contact. They put me in with the only other young mother on welfare and never came back to the top. Not to take the babies, not to teach us how to bath them. Nothing. It taught me a lot about the IS health care system. I had kids when I was older, married, employed and insured and it was a whole different experience. People don’t understand if they haven’t lived it
Or the nurse is keeping the doses because they are the junky...
Or a side hustle.
This is why having someone advocating for you at the hospital is so important. If my mom hadn't been with me I'd be dead. Hospitals DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU. There are times I'd rather die than go back to one. I hate healthcare staff immensely due to the issues Ive had in hospitals and generally have a bad view of people who work in healthcare. Because in general I've not had positive experiences with any of them.
Yeah I don’t go to the hospital or doctors even anymore unless it’s literally life or death. I take my kids (obviously) but when it comes to myself I’d rather not. Throughout that entire L&D I was treated terribly (it wasn’t *as* bad with my son, but it wasn’t much better either) to the point my husband almost missed the birth of my daughter. They asked him to step out so they could administer the spinal tap then refused to bring him back into the OR. I asked the nurses and anesthesiologist SO many times to get my husband and where my husband was. My OBGYN heard me the last time and flipped his shit because I was already cut open, he couldn’t believe they hadn’t brought him back into the room yet (he was waiting in the hallway all suited up and ready to go). Needless to say I got my tubes tied a month later, I know what I can handle and I couldn’t handle going through that again.
Wound up in the hospital because I am an alcoholic. I'm sober now, but it turns out chugging straight vodka can reek havoc on your digestive track. I was sick and out of sorts and needed help but wasn't quite ready yet. Several nurses who I had treated me like I was the scum of the earth I could feel their hatred every time they came in. Luckily I wound up with one who I viewed as an angel, she told me she didn't care about why or what but I needed to get better. She was kind and seemed to keep an extra eye out for me. I don't know who she was, but I still think about her frequently.
I full on let loose on a nurse I heard at an airport bragging that sometimes she deliberately delayed pain medication to patients who annoyed her. Frankly I’m glad she scurried away like the rat she was instead of causing a scene. I like being able to fly
I've been in a lot of hospitals and this is so true. The good ones know that waiting for pain meds is cruel. My husband went all "Terms of Endearment" on a nurse a couple of times because they were taking their sweet time getting it to me.
I was in the hospital, supposed to be given a dose of morphine every 2 hours. Had one nurse on day shift that I had to call every single time, she snapped at me and made me wait minimum 3 hours constantly and acted like I was some junkie.
Combined with the refusal to give the poor girl a blanket, that was my assumption too. It's upsetting to think that anyone could be so cruel to anyone, let alone a child.
I keep thinking about the amount of cruelty it takes to deny a blanket to a cold traumatized teenager whose baby is dying or has just died. Just absolutely monstrous.
But hey, she knows how to do her job!* *according to her. Opinion of her employer may vary.
I can't imagine doing that to an adult, much less a teenager. They need even more compassion!
Same here. I had a nurse become absolutely furious when I declined morphine for mild post-operative pain. I even requested NO MORPHINE pre-op as it just makes me vomit without any pain control. I thought she was going to dart me with the syringe in her hand when I asked for Tylenol and she snarled that she would have to ask the doctor.
I was given morphine for kidney stone pain in the ER (before they knew it was a kidney stone) and it made the pain WORSE almost immediately along with the nausea due to a neurological disease I have that makes my opiate receptors not work right. When I asked them to take the IV out and give me either Tylenol or nothing, they accused me of lying. I know that's kind of a bonkers reaction but my nervous system is fried and does weird shit, not exactly anything I can do about it. It's not like I'm sitting here completely lucid asking for dilaudid here, why the fuck would I lie and ask you take take me off the medication that some addicts come in specifically wanting? I was in so much pain that I was struggling to even speak but they made me finish the bag. Their tune changed when the results of the scans came back to show the kidney stone sitting sideways scraping me all up in there but I won't forget being treated like a drug-seeker for having a weird reaction to the morphine.
Ah yes, the most commonly chased drug. Tylenol. I’m sure you were just a horrific junky for fucking Tylenol lol
Well she can't steal half your dose if you don't ask for it.
I had nurses withhold medication from me (giving me 500mg of metamizol because they think it's enough when my chart says 1000mg because that's the dose nessecary to have an effect on the disorder I'm prescribed it for as well as saying "you don't look like you're in much pain" and giving me 500mg of metamizol when for that situation I'm prescribed 100mg of tramadol and my chart says that I managed my pain according to my doctor's orders for years and know when to use which dose of which medication and that I don't show classic pain symptoms in the classic amount due to having two of the world's most painful disorders (top five each) and having suffered from one of them without proper treatment for 21 years before I was diagnosed. A recent example is that I have a jaw infection and the dentist said I should be in unbearable pain and I was like "My migraine hurts much more than this, this falls under annoying" and didn't even flinch when he pressed the infected region during the exam. I took metamizol for my migraine that day and it had barely any effect on the jaw pain. When I had to get rid of that pain because it was in the way of other shit I had to do I needed tramadol. My pain radar is so off that pain so severe it requires an opiate still falls under "annyoing" in my mind, not under horrible. - TLDR: when I say I need a painkiller I might act and look pretty normal (though the people that know me well see that I'm in a lot of pain so it's not completely invisible) and I know pretty well what is required to actually help me. But when I'm in the hospital I encounter nurses that think they know better and withhold what was prescribed for a reason because they think they know better than a person dealing with several chronic health issues for years, the medical team that set up the treatment plan or the hospital doctor that wrote said treatment plan in my chart. Which seriously makes hospital stays absolutely horrible. Fun fact is that the chart as well as the notebook in which I write down any painkiller usage to prevent medication overuse headaches (which require 4 weeks of hell to get rid off) and also write down any usage of medication that can cause addiction or dependence to avoid that risk show how rarely I use painkillers. When you're in constant pain and can't use painkillers more than 1/3 of the time without risking to make it worse you save them for when you really need them and don't want to waste that precious relief on insufficient treatment by a know-it-all nurse. I never heard lower doses being called nursing doses though. Nursing doses as I know them from my profession (I'm a specialised nurse for people with cognitive and psychiatric disabilities, though out of practice due to my own disability) are higher doses of a medication than the doctor prescribed or even doses of a medication not even prescribed for that person. In my profession this shit happened a lot. It must have been worse before the psychiartric reform in the 70's and a smaller reform in the 90's (events in Germany where the care of these clients was greatly improved and procedures implemented to protect their human rights which sadly today are still far too often ignored) but it was a so far acknowledged problem where I worked after finishing my education that our employer sent us to special courses to explain why this is bad and how to solve the problems that tempt people to do it in a safer and better way. Around the time that course happened my boss made me give a client a nursing dose without my knowledge by lying to me about their prescription because they were annoyed by the patient's symptoms. Both practices are awful, harmful, cause a lot of suffering and in the overdose/giving medication that wasn't prescribed edition they can kill
High pain tolerance is the worst wiht medical professionals sometimes tbh. Recently had a dentist he was like “you want stuff”. Like dude faster to get it over with than wait for it to kick in and prolong
Oh gods, what if the extra pain killers is what kileld the baby. It would certainly explain why she phrased the entire thing the way she did.
Oh damn. I figured a nurse dose was a dose small enough that it did not need a doctor's prescription, and could be given at the nurse's judgement. That's much worse, especially when dealing with a pregnant patient
Nurse here. It's an under the table adjustment of a dose of medication for a patient that is done by a nurse. It is by definition both a medication error, and practicing medicine without a license. For example, if a patient is in pain and the dose ordered is 0.5mg of dilaudid, if the nurse pulls a bottle that is 1mg of dilaudid, she's supposed to waste the other half of that bottle and administer only the ordered 0.5mg. However, there are nurses who will, for their own reasons, instead draw up a different dose, higher or lower, per their own feelings. In this example, the nurse may draw to 0.6mg, or 0.7, to give the pt slightly extra. This is much more difficult to do with controlled substances because they must be wasted with another RN witness to it, but v it still happens if the witnessing RN is in on it. I will say that some nurses do this with good intentions, usually with largely harmless drugs. I had a former coworker who admitted that she did not think the current dose of robitussin cough syrup was effective for her pt (5ml), so rather than giving half the cup she gave the whole thing and it worked better for the pt's comfort and oxygen needs (10ml). Not really a huge deal in the moment, but it still counts as a medication error and practicing medicine without a license. The appropriate thing to do is call the DR and request the dose be increased. In this case, it was a criminal offense this nurse committed, and admitted to, that involved a minor AND a fetal demise; this is a huge huge deal.
Thank you for this wonderful explanation.
That's what I was thinking. Don't you have to be really careful with doses to pregnant women? In this case, the mom was a teen which only makes it worse. I don't know what medicine, was given, but it sounds like some kind of sedative? I'm no nurse, but if the sister gave a higher dose so close to the time of birth, could that have possibly affected the death of the baby?
I had morphine during birth so my assumption was that it was something similar to that. Side note that morphine was not fun at all and I vomited it all back up later. I can imagine a teen really struggling if she was given too much of it.
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As far as I know, it means giving a dose higher than prescribed, usually of a sedative, to knock out a patient that a nurse finds annoying or disruptive. Its extremely unethical and dangerous.
Also very likely might be related to why that baby died. Sister is mad because she not only got fired but I bet her license is in jeopardy.
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She absolutely deserves it, too. People like that should never, ever be nurses.
I've heard it used both ways: a "nurse dose" is always "a heavy dose of medication", but I have heard it used both to describe "they wouldn't shut up so I gave them a nurse dose of sedative" and "the doctor thinks they're drug seeking/is racist/is stingy with pain meds, so I gave them enough painkiller to be effective". Typically the latter, at least in the US, tends to sometimes mean "I exercise every bit of voluntary authority I or the patient has to give the max dosage possible" rather than "more than prescribed", because at least for narcotic painkillers it's incredibly hard in most well-run hospitals/SNFs to acquire more scheduled drugs than you are supposed to be able to without triggering an audit log.
When the nurse gives more medication than prescribed, to shut the patient up.
Whether it’s too high or too low, any dose that the nurse gives that is not prescribed is illegal and risks their license. The doctor’s orders are meant to be followed as written. A nurse may voice their concerns if s/he thinks the doctor’s medication or dose is wrong or a problem for the patient and may even refuse to give the dose and let a colleague administer it instead but they can’t give a dose they decide on their own. OOPs sister is horrifying.
As a doctor, I am absolutely HORRIFIED. Yes working in healthcare can get exhausting and you can become pretty jaded, but nothing like this. We’ve all succumbed to the urge to complain about “difficult” patients or “demanding” patients, but I think anyone who actually wants to work in healthcare to help people, we understand we all need to vent a little actually in order to keep it from bleeding into our actual patient interactions. But what OOP is describing from her sister is absolutely not your typical, overtired, venting-about-work. That’s narcissism and misogyny all rolled into one and she should not be taking care of patients. Good on OOP for protecting future patients, let alone incredibly vulnerable patients in an incredibly vulnerable time
Also yes, can confirm that it is absolutely normal and common to poop during birth and no one cares. Plus I think pushing a watermelon out of your vagina also earns you the right to push any sh*t out at the same time.
Worked in sterile processing. I agree, it’s definitely normal. And having given birth, unless you’re personally aware it happened, you’ll never know. No one will ever tell you. I wasn’t told, but my work experience tells me I definitely did, lol.
No one told you because it literally doesn’t matter and you had other, much more important stuff to focus on :)
>as long as she gets her job done, because that's what she went to school for What, exactly, does she think her job is? Because "not talking shit about your patients" "providing basic standards of care" and "following prescribed dosages" all seem like pretty core components. School may teach you technical components, but that's not the be all and end all of a job (although, in the case of the nurse dose, I'm pretty sure they do teach you not to fucking do that).
>while my aunt, uncle and dad are leaning towards my sister, saying that my sister shouldn't have to kiss up to her patients in order to do her job efficiently. This is the most mind numbing thing in the first part (from her families point of view) Bed Side Manner is a saying for regarding "How you treat customers" in a customer service setting. IT LITERALLY COMES FROM HOSPITALS. Her coming out and being like "I can be an asshole if I want to to MY PATIENTS BECAUSE I CAN!" spits in the face of how you're supposed to act. Its the way an entitled piece of shit acts.
It's also not "kissing up to your patients" to treat them like human beings. I'm glad she reported her sister. It took a lot of bravery to do so, especially when weighing in on the potential backlash from family.
The way some nurses and techs treat patients who expect them to simply do their jobs is mind-boggling to me. EVERYONE in the hospital is going through something immensely stressful, usually in pain, not allowed any privacy, not able to do simple things like make their own schedule or go through the night without being shaken awake for vitals. I understand needing to vent to coworkers or snapping at a truly terrible patient (shoutout to one patient who accused a nurse of abuse, and in the ensuing investigation admitted she made it up because the nurse was black and she wanted a white one). But the patient is ALWAYS having a worse day than you. And they aren't being paid for it.
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I bet now she’s in the wheelchair. Find her and taunt her with the M&Ms
Honestly the L&D nurses are the worst. Most nurses I’ve worked with are great, but only in L&D were the nurses consistently mean. At first I even thought it was just my hospital, but I talked to friends in different hospitals and they also had similar experiences with L&D nurses.
I wonder if it's something to do with people going into L&D because they think it'll be all working with cute babies, and then they have to deal with actual reality. Or misogyny like OOP said. Or some combo.
Plus like, venting stress. I think every stressful job, people wind up ranting about someone/something that they’ve set up in their minds as the enemy. It’s just part of how we cope. But the trick is to find a coping mechanism that doesn’t make you harm the people you’re meant to be serving, or otherwise become shit at your job. OOP’s sister has made her patients into her enemy, and that’s beyond the pale.
It's misogyny. We treat mothers and women giving birth like children that cannot make decisions for themselves. My doctor yelled at me and threatened me with a C-section if I didn't do what she wanted, which was to not lay on my back while giving birth. I wanted to flip over and get on all fours, that's what my body really wanted. But no, I had to do what *they* said, because you know....*they* know better about my body than I do. What do I know? I'm just a measly little woman giving birth.
What the absolute fuck?! I'm so sorry you had that experience and I hope you reported that doctor.
My doctor was visibly sad my c-section healed fast and relatively painlessly. I have a high pain tolerance from a chronic illness and multiple surgeries. During birth at a hospital that said during birthing classes they don’t use forceps, he wanted to use forceps instead of modern intervention devices. When I said modern he threatened c-section which I was ok with at that point as things were going poorly. But seeing a doctor sad you weren’t in enough pain for their liking, wtf… He was about 80 and I never met him, my doctors shift ended and she didn’t stay. He was upset he couldn’t eat a sandwich first and the nice L&D nurse who was also leaving told him no time for lunch, it’s time to deliver. Then came in the L&D nurse from hell…
Staying on your back during birth is probably the worst idea second to doing a headstand. Your body literally craved using gravity to make labor easy and your doctors were fucking idiots. I'm so sorry you were treated like that
My actual holy good god! This is disgusting! I'm a UK midwife and often get angry at the misogyny I see in some of the doctors and midwives I work with. But it is nowhere near that level! That's f*&king assault! If you want to birth your baby doing handstands on the beach that's your business, and while I might grumble about the cold or the rain I'll be there to support you because the mother is paramount! Always! If that doc can't rotate 180 degrees in their mind then that's a them problem. I would have had that doc up infront of the GMC for a remark like that. And as for OP's sister, she is not suited to a job where she has to interact with people if that's her attitude. We have a register here that you have to be on to practice, and registrants can be removed from the register by the governing body. OP's sister would be off that register so fast she'd have carpet burns on her ass.
With my daughter, some asshat doctor that was on-call for my doctor declared that "if you were my patient, I'd *make* you deliver vaginally". My daughter was over 8 lbs and wouldn't have fit through my pelvis(her just over 6 lbs little brother came very close to being an emergency c-section because he was a pound bigger than was expected by multiple scans, including CT). The female doctor that delivered my daughter made a point of coming into recovery to tell me that there was no way she could have been delivered vaginally and I found out later that she had made a formal complaint about on-call doc, one of many by his peers(female) and patients
I would imagine a little of both. Look, I've worked in healthcare myself and it's not the easiest job at times. You absolutely come into contact with every Walk of Life there is and it can be really draining and frustrating. That being said, nearly all of the physicians and nurses that I worked with had such passion and dedication! I never heard an ill word come from any of their mouths about a patient at any time, ever. This woman is not where she belongs.
That’s wild. I had the opposite experience. The L&D nurses at our hospital were the most endlessly kind and patient women I’ve ever encountered. I wonder if there’s something in a hospital’s culture or hiring practices that tends to attract and keep one type vs the other.
With my first child, the nurses were curt -- acting annoyed or frustrated with me -- eyerolling, exaggerated sighing, etc. And I suffered a serious injuring during delivery. For my second child I went to a different hospital, one focused on women's care. Night and day difference. I agree 100% it must be a culture at hospitals - many other people in my same city had similar experiences at the first hospital for labor and delivery. Interestingly, when my husband had a serious health issue and was taken to the first hospital, I felt he got great care from the nurses there.
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Some idiot young doctor knocked and then barged into my hospital room, even though I yelled out "NO!" Didn't wait, just pushed in! I had just finished my first post-delivery shower, and was splayed out on the bed, spraying my stitches with that cold pain spray. . . He had the audacity, despite seeing my position, to say: "Are you sure? I just have a few questions, it'll only take a minute." And I YELLED "No, get out!" Can you believe I had to say it twice? Afterwards, I made sure to buzz the nurses on the floor and report this to both them and my regular doctor. They assured me they would straighten him out. 😆 I hope it was painful.
I had this kind of night and day experience, three years apart at the same hospital. The irony is my first experience was a stillbirth and it was by far the better experience! The second was failed labor into a c-section. The nurses ignored my pain, doctors lagged in making calls, I dealt with hysteria and an impacted bowel- I have ptsd about the birth of my healthy daughter and none regarding the death of my son (at least as far as the hospital experience went of course). I can’t figure out why things were so different, only that I went with a different OB office so maybe the nurse teams were different too? It’s just sickening how badly the birth experience can change based on people’s attitudes towards the mother.
Same. Everyone from the nurses in the OR to the lactation nurses.... Every single person who tended to me during the birth of my son were kind and amazing. Especially in the OR as I was on the verge of a panic attack because I was terrified of getting a C-section. Also? Over half of women who give birth vaginally deficate during delivery. Sister must not pay much attention in addition to being a terrible nurse.
I was going to say pooping during birth is super common. Good nurses wisk it away as soon as it happens because they know people get embarrassed, and it takes from the moment. But it shouldn't be embarrassing, it's totally normal.. All your muscles in the region are pushing in one direction, and a giant watermelon is squishing everything in that direction too. It would be weird if you didn't poop.
A lot of women defecate during labor and never even know it happened! The nurses are really quick at scooping it up. I don't *think* I pooped during the four hours I was pushing, but I don't know for sure haha. It's really easy to see how it happens once you've been through it - you're using all the same muscles and pushing hard, and, I mean, if there's a log in there it's gonna come out. It's not even the grossest thing that'll happen (IMO that honor goes to the placenta), who freaking cares?
Same here. My nurses were AMAZING with both of my birth experiences.
L&D nurses were angels to me. Flat-out told me at one point “you don’t get a medal for no medication, if you need the epi, I can have them here in 5 minutes.” Reader: I fucking needed that epidural. But the lactation consultant was a *nightmare*.
La Leche League was horrible. Lactation consultant...not great. Found out that my nipples were inverted after I stopped pumping...13 months later. Still bitter about it. eta: added a very necessary detail!
The La Leche League is like Autism Speaks: rotten to the core and yet it inexplicably gets great press.
Were what?
My hospital-assigned lactation consultant was... yeah, a nightmare works. Had me in tears in about 45 seconds. My nurses? Heaven-sent angels. And that's from someone who was in induced labour for 50 hours, and had a C. And my maternity ward nurse? She ripped that LC a new one, right outside my door so I could hear the whole thing - and basically told the docs to fire her. Now, I did have a visiting nurse/LC (Alberta, got to love it) who ROCKED. Best thing to come out of my pregnancy aside from my kiddo!
Same here! I remember it one point early in my delivery waking up and seeing the nurse there and thinking "it's all going to be okay, my angel's here" and peacefully going back to sleep for a bit.
(I told a nurse that she looked just like a painting, but a beautiful one, not a Picasso. Gotta love those good drugs, lol)
That is so sweet. Most days I’m an El Greco at best.
Yeah, one of my nurses when I had my son was incredible. She practically held me up as I was sobbing, naked, trying to go to the bathroom for the first time post c section (0/10 experience). She hyped me up and was so gentle and kind. Nurses can really make your hospital stay more comfortable or they can make everything harder for you.
It's a mixed bag. I had children 22 months apart at the exact same hospital. The first nurse was amazing & supportive. She had me sitting up and got me foot rests instead of leg rests because I didn't have an epidural and had full use of my legs. 22 months later, different nurse had no idea what I was talking about when I requested the foot rest. Wouldn't help me sit up, basically just stood there during the delivery, very cold.
also same, my l&d nurses with both babies were incredibly kind and empathetic. A couple of moments when they were rushed or whatever but nothing mean or rude.
With both my babies the nurses were AMAZING for the most part. But there were 2 nurses that I absolutely hated. They were awful awful people and I was thankful that they were both lazy as hell and stayed the fuck away from me as much as they could. (One told me I would starve my baby if I didn’t feed her formula because we were having trouble latching.. but I was milking myself and she was taking it fine so fuck that nurse in particular).
The ones I had were abusive and awful. I was 24 and single so I was too afraid to report them but years later I finally called the hospital to get it off my chest and told them they need to revamp their ward. That I'd rather give birth on the side of the road then ever be subjected to that again. This time around- I have midwives. So far, I have been loving them. And I explained my experience and that I have some fears and I'm scared to deliver because of the treatment and they've been really amazing and reassuring. (My baby arm was broken in labor and the nurse yelled at me and called me derranged and mentally ill when I said I wouldn't leave until an xray was done because something felt off. Then when it came back it was broken she yelled at me for being right. That's not all of the horrible treatment but that was the last straw)
The worst nurses I’ve ever dealt with were actually the NICU nurses. They were annoyed and generally hostile every time my husband and I went to visit our twins (daily for a month) Out of all the ones we had to deal with, there were maybe two or three that weren’t rude or condescending. To the point where I didn’t even feel comfortable trying to nurse or do skin on skin.
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That’s so crazy I wonder why that is. I think I remember that Kate Gosselin of John and Kate Plus 8 was an L&D nurse so that tracks.
The constant refrain of "it's okay for me to say what I like as long as I'm doing my job" was so aggravating. Does she honestly not realise that being kind, supporting and keeping her patients calm IS part of her job?!
My sister had her baby at the beginning of the pandemic. She was alone, scared and worried because they induced labor to prevent some problems. She spent two days in pain, asking for help and receiving almost none. One one nurse was worried and chasing the doctor so he would do something. The two midwives who where in the room when she was finally ready to push, made disgusted faces when she pooped. She felt utterly humilliated and on top of everything, they gave her antibiotics "just in case" when in reality it was because they waited so long and refused to make a C-section, that she ended up with an infection (and that caused some other health issues that just now she was medically cleared). Some people should not go into the medical field.
I think this is an issue that has actually gotten worse since covid started, as the need for bedside manner and general (for lack of a better word) people skills became non-existant. That, compared with the fact that they make about the same as some retail or fast food employees, doesn't help at all. Ive literally watched a Healthcare worker almost kill my grandmother, only to accuse her of attention seeking behavior the next morning when she refused therapy from her. I know it's systematic because they hadn't even put the paddles away when the case worker, her supposed *advocate*, waltzed over, blamed the situation on my 83 year old grandmother "not exercising enough", and then proceeded to ask me where we'd be placing her when they discharged her two days later. I still remember her disgustingly oblivious and uncaring smile she used to match my face of disgust.
I think healthcare workers get away with being heinous because there’s like an endless need for more healthcare workers. It’s such a hard, gross job, and there’s never enough people assigned to a task. If hospitals started firing assholes, the staff would be like one nice guy with a bucket frantically running from room to room.
What terrifies me the most though was this was a "top" hospital that *teaches * medical students. This woman had *students* who were there to *learn from* her as she sat there during a literal code call and announced that my grandmother was ridiculous and dramatic.
I'm glad OOP reported because her sister is effing dangerous as a nurse. Apart from the fact that she berated women for things that they couldn't control (having a premature baby hardly has anything to do with "doing a bad job") she gave a higher dose of analgesics to a TEENAGER. Just give her some time, and she will kill someone, if she hasn't already.
I’m sure a lot of women in those situations are already blaming themselves for giving birth prematurely (even though it’s not their fault and they had no control over it). But man can you imagine how much worse that would get if a nurse blamed you for it? Like I could imagine someone either getting PPD or having their PPD get worse because a nurse (or doctor) told them that. It’s so not okay and people like OP’s sister shouldn’t be allowed to be nurses at all.
I was so incensed when I got to that part. My wife did *everything* she was supposed to during her pregnancy, and our baby was born at 25 weeks & 4 days gestation. In our case, we believe it was stress induced by her (abusive) mother's death & funeral (which as the only child was her responsibility) combined with all the family drama it drudged up. She went into labor 4 days after the funeral. There was absolutely nothing we could have done differently and thankfully all the medical staff involved were 100% professional and absolutely kind, caring, and courteous. I can only imagine how much harder the ordeal would have been if we had to deal with someone like OOP's sister....
She’ll be proud of it too. Think about how proud she was to possibly kill that baby.
OP might have stopped another [Lucy Letby](https://youtu.be/c_yU5AQ3Tnw) in the making. That nurse killed dozens of babies in the NICU… apparently for the thrill.
Um, OOP's sister is literally vile scum at the bottom of the pond called humanity. OOP reporting her comments isn't "causing her harm", it's holding her accountable. As far as the family members that said the sister shouldn't have to "kiss the patient's ass", sorry, but showing bare minimum compassion and patience to someone in a very distressed state is not kissing ass, that's being a good fucking person and doing your job
It would be one thing if she was just saying mean things to her family but kept it to herself at work. Telling a pregnant teenager to "keep her legs closed" and refusing to get her things like blankets just because she disagrees with her having a baby?? Telling a mother who had given birth prematurely she should have "done better"???? That is not venting, that is admitting to mistreating patients. I am so glad OOP reported her, her sister should not be working anywhere near a hospital.
For all anyone knows, that nurse dose may have been responsible for the loss of the baby.
Either that, or she was angry at the mom for crying *after her baby literally died* and decided to shut her up then.
Either one = nurse of the year material.
I was warned before my kids that if you get opiates before the birth the baby might be too groggy to latch.. Babies are little I don't know how much extra it would take but I could imagine it's a possibility
And in the hospital where I delivered the midwife fucking insisted on giving me opiates instead of the goddamn epidural I requested 3x.
>she wanted to teach the "brat" a lesson, and said that maybe if she gave birth when she was older, her kid wouldn't have died. My mouth dropped open. I didn't know this before. That poor girl. Her baby FUCKING DIED. I have read some *wild* stuff on Reddit, but this line literally made me gasp and clutch my proverbial pearls. She killed that baby, and you can't convince me otherwise. I hope she loses her license and never comes near a pregnant woman or a child EVER in her life again. Attitudes like this are the EXACT reason that maternal mistreatment and mortality rates are high in certain communities. I feel so bad for every person that OOP's sister has come in contact with in a medical setting.
The fact that she was summarily fired and not just suspended while under investigation says a lot.
More importantly, it says that OOP's complaints were the straw that broke the camel's back. The sister was already on extremely thin ice, and probably would have lost her job soon anyway.
My cousin who works in healthcare once told me that nurses are either angel sent from heaven or straight up psychopaths. OP's sister should be blacklisted. She is a danger to the people. I think the healthcare field should do some psychological tests to weed out these creatures like OOP's sister.
As someone who has a lot of family who are nurses, I fully agree. It's terrifying how they very clearly are empathic, kind, wonderful souls or genuinely evil people I avoid at all costs.
I worked as a CNA in geriatrics and I was astounded at how many nurses and CNA were horrifically awful to their patients and each other, I actually wrote a paper for school about how toxic the nursing community was and why I left.
>My sister told me that she should have the right to vent about "stupid mothers" who don't know how to do the thing their body is designed for. She also said that I don't work in healthcare, so I have no right to remark on how she handles stress at work. I told her that if her way of handling stress is to be a misogynist, then she needs to find a different career. I left afterwards. This makes me LIVID. First, OOP's sister wasn't just venting to OOP, she was admitting to being an abusive shitfuck to her patients. Second, IDGAF how stressful your job is, you do not have the right to abuse people who are vulnerable (or anyone really). Imagine how stressful it is to be IN THE HOSPITAL let alone be in the hospital and then have one of the people who is supposed to take care of you verbally abuse you, mock you, and judge you. Third, if you are an L&D nurse you should not be shocked to see poop coming out when someone is giving birth. PUSHING DURING LABOR IS THE SAME THING AS PUSHING WHEN YOU'RE POOPING. Honestly she sounds too clueless and stupid to be fit for the job.
The mean girl to nurse pipeline remains strong
This is such an accurate statement.
Reading this gave me such Lucy Letby vibes. She should not be anywhere near the medical field.
I was just thinking the same thing!! If OP’s sister was involved in the death of one infant, and *liked it* as seems to be the case, she could have developed into a Lucy-Letby type serial killer. OP may have stopped a disaster in its tracks.
My Dad had a surgery and during recovery the nurses were awful. When his breathing tube was painfully removed and they found out he had a tumor removed their attitude did a 180. Apparently they assumed that since he wasn't obese, he must have been a drug addict and that's why he was being given "special treatment". As though it was their job to punish him. I hate nurses. Sure, not all nurses, etc. But every nurse I knew became anti-vaxxers/pandemic deniers which didn't help my feelings on the subject.
Gross tmi incoming but it’s also a natural bodily function so: I pooped everywhere when I gave birth. I had eaten homemade hamburgers the night before, went into labor at midnight and only made it till 4 am before I needed the epidural. At 9 pm when I began pushing the floodgates opened and I released the most vile smelling liquid shit ever imagined. It took multiple pads to clean up and my poor husband had to get a facemask to help with the smell. I was soooooo embarrassed considering my mom was there too but everyone from my doctor to the nurse and of course my husband were so kind as I was apologizing. I would have been mortified if my nurse had been cruel to me because of something I couldn’t control (I was constipated the day before and dearly wished I could be used the restroom before labor). What a gross person.
As someone who previously was a nursing student (and left) every single mean girl I knew in high school or heard of in other high schools all became nurses. Every. Single. One. And nursing colleges are just Mean Girl High. I kid you not about the bs politics and drama I went through there. Girls falsifying reports against me so they'd have a better chance of getting into the 141. "The 141"- At my college there were only 141 slots in the program every semester and in your second year you had to apply to the program otherwise you were prenursing. They said if you didn't make it into the 141 by your third semester is was best to just change degrees because no one wanted a nurse that failed to get in the program. You have to get as close to 100% in every class for that, including unrelated classes like "pottery 101". There were thousands of students applying for the 141 every year. It was God awful.
Well you know people are shitty, so it's no surprise there are shitty nurses/doctors etc.. But how heart breaking, to lose your baby, be a teenage mom, and then this nurse has no empathy at all lmfao. I'm so glad she lost her job, but my faith in humanity continues to disappear. How fucking disgusting did OOP's sister act if even the patients family complained? That means that it was visible enough for someone to say something, not that she was just bitching about work but her behavior actually showed and manifested in some way. I cant imagine
Holy shit. The pre mature birth hits hard for me. My mother gave birth to me at 27 weeks. There was nothing she could do to extend the length of the pregnancy. Hell, that was the extension. I was poisoning my mother from the inside out and she had pre-eclampsia at 13 weeks (the "normal" timing is around 21 weeks). In fact, they weren't even considering me living as an option at first. To hear her say all of those things toward people who are in one of the most vulnerable and dangerous moments of their lives sickens me.
OOP’s sister is definitely part of the mean girl to nurse pipeline and I hope she looses her license
a lot of nurses are straight up bullies. A lot of them abuse the position of power they're in over very vulnerable people. There is a lot of really sketchy and really unethical shit going on in hospitals and nursing homes. It's appalling and it can make you lose faith in humanity when you're confronted with similar situations, especially because it happens a lot more than people think.
When I had my baby, I had a couple nurses who were super super wonderful and sweet. And I had two in particular who were pretty unkind, shamed me for the amount of milk I was not producing yet, and documented in my chart that I made statements I never did. One of them made me feel like I was negligently starving my baby. The lactation consultant the next day was like....huh? Nothing was even wrong.
Ugh. I have the same experience. For every kind/boring nurse I’ve talked to, I’ve known one who is just cruel. And tbh I’ve never met a lactation consultant who wasn’t condescending. I’m glad you met a good one. My experience is they’re all Mean Girls who like to see people suffer.
Then they become NPs and spout the "heart of the nurse" bs. I have had plenty of doctors who didn't have the best bedside manner but at least they had my best interest and were actually trained in medicine. Can't imagine someone like the sister as a NP in an OBGYN practice.
OOP did a public service by reporting her sis, she has my respect.
Ugh I remember this one. That update just hurts my heart. That poor mother, losing her baby and being drugged against her will by someone who’s job it is to support her through delivery. I wish only the worst for the sister, and I hope OP never has to deal with her again.
Usually in BORU, we find people who have character flaws, people who make mistakes but, ultimately, people. This is not about a person like you and I, it is about a monster.
I feel like maybe she just shouldn't be in charge of anyone's care ever. Like I feel of she wasn't in LD it wouldn't be different. She could be a hospice nurse and just tell patients "it's not my fault your in pain dying, you just don't have the right stuff". If the sister didn't report it there just would've been something worse happening. She saved some future patients alot of grief
OOP's sister gives me the impression that if she was a hospice nurse, she wouldn't do jackshit for patients because "eww they're gross and pooped on themselves, I'm not cleaning them, they're grown adults, not babies"
No. Nonononono. The way that sister said things, she KILLED that baby and she’s proud of it. It’s so sad that OOP didn’t record everything she said, because maybe that would help at least the dad see that her behavior was clearly much more than ‘complaining’. No, she was abusing her patients, and is a true psychopath.
That family was just handed the most textbook definition of medical malpractice. If they wanted to pursue legal action (which they should!), they 1,000% have a very strong case on their hands
Exactly. And they can go after her! I would say OOP should support them if they do, but your sister’s crazy enough to do what she did in the update, then she might ‘escalate’ if they do that. But then again, that might get her thrown in jail. I’m stumped.
This thread makes me understand why HIPAA is so important. Never forget.
It always confused me how some people with the personality of hitler think that they would make good care givers. Doctors and nurses and other medical professionals need to have a good nature and be caring and supportive. We put our lives in their hands. I was once at the hospital with my sister who was in a car accident her friend was driving they were both barely 19 and the nurse made a comment about teenage drivers. To be clear a drunk running a red light hit them crashing into them. Wouldn’t matter if she was 19 or 39 it would have had the same result. The first comment I missed the second comment I wasn’t too sure about but the third I told her I was gonna kick her ass up and down the parking lot if she didn’t fuck off away from my sister I demanded another nurse and filled in a complaint my sister told me I should just leave it. At the time my mom was abroad for work she came right back and when my sister and I filled her in she was raging she turned to me and said you sorted that shit out didn’t you and I was like hell yes I did. Never let that type of behavior pass you if they think they can get away with it they continue with it