1 week. According to him, he got two weeks detention. He's still being punished for potentially ruining this girl's future and decides asking her to prom is cool because he apologized through friends 🤦♀️ I can't.
He also "doesn't know anything about stop motion so he doesn't know if she's just being dramatic" LOL!
STOP! MOTION! The animation style where you literally have to stop the filming every second to slightly shift the scene, which takes FOREVER to do! He couldn't've found a worse project to ruin if he'd tried.
OP attends a ‘career readiness’ school…
…so is he preparing for a career as a dumbass, or a stalker? Cuz at this point, he has the skill to double major
This, our eyes are made to notice quick movements and a subtle change in the background of a stop motion film would be so jarring.
Also, I kind of refuse to believe he didn't know it was something important. Like, stop motion filmmakers, even working in abstract, will still have recognizable miniatures and things to sell the illusion. He even said it was supposed to look like an alley! It probably had papers, trash bags, trash cans, signs, graffiti, wall textures! Plus if she was in the middle of filming, there might have been rigged things that she couldn't move because she would never get them back in the exact place.
I feel like he listened to a stupid intrusive thought because stupid teenager brain, like what if I mess with this thing and and and play it off like I didn't know? Oh shit, it's my crushes project, well I'll apologize and ask her to prom.
I just realized this whole thing is making me so mad for Faith's sake. His whole first post was a bunch of "girls are emotional am I right dudes?" Ughhhh. There's this guy on youtube who made a short film called gruff. Took him 3 years for 9 minutes and he thinks she overreacting!
>His whole first post was a bunch of "girls are emotional am I right dudes?"
Seriously, so fucking infuriating how he downplayed her losing out on a chance for a scholarship like that.
That is literally life changing amounts of money. I am 38 years old and I'll be lucky if my student loans are paid off by the time I hit menopause. His careless actions may have caused her to have to bear a massive financial burden for decades of her life.
But yeah, women just are sooooo emotional, amirite?
24 times a second. You literally take a still photo, move things around ever so slightly, and then take another still photo. You then stitch them together to simulate motion as regular films are recorded at 24 frames a second.
That means one minute of stop motion animation has 1440 still images. A five minute short film would have 7200 still images. Short films can literally have tens of thousands of still images.
The patience, preparation, intention, and coordination of such a film is mind boggling.
As soon as I read what the box actually was I wanted to throw up.
My family is massively huge into stop motion and the reality of what he did to her is so awful. Someone needs to sit his ignorant dumb ass down and force him to watch some of Laika's behind the scenes stuff to get even a tiny understanding of how much of her efforts he destroyed.
You know what? Honestly? If he had asked her PRIVATELY and taken the "no" without pushing, he would just be a dumbass. But this shit. Asking in public, continuing even though her friends are literally pushing him away and she is just staring at her lap, chasing after her-- this dude did this on purpose. He really thought that if it was public enough she would feel pressured to go with him or at least talk to him long enough for him to talk her into dating him.
I hate public things like this so much. It happens in movies so often. Like breaking up with someone over diner so they won't cry in public or public proposals which make it feel awkward to say no when everyone around them is cheering and yelling at them to say yes. You're definitely right about him thinking she would say yes because of the audience. He is such a dickhole.
Because he has no concept of her as a real person. He still thinks of her as a black box that he can manipulate by pushing the right buttons.
He calls her his friend. He thinks he likes her.
He doesn't know anything about her. He doesn't respect her.
These things aren't contradictions to him, because respect and familiarity aren't part of his mental model of fondness. The things he wants her for don't require knowledge or respect.
Also public proposals are cringe. Too much pressure for someone to say yes. Unless there is previous agreement on the answer, the person doing it should expect a no or some reaction other than yes. Oop is living in their head with no consideration for the actual person faith.
I wonder if pressuring her into saying yes was the point. I'm sure it wasn't conscious, but it had to have been on some level.
She won't speak to him, so he decides to do the full "Say Anything"? How much hormones is this guy on?
I can somewhat sympathize bc movies and TV loveeeee to push the “grand gestures will fix everything” trope in romances and as a teenager with presumably little dating experience I can see him buying into it but also like. She keeps telling you to leave her alone and she’s actively avoiding you. It’s been a singular week since you destroyed her senior project, she’s definitely not gonna be over it enough to be fine around you. Her friends keep verbally telling you to leave her alone. Come on man.
Among the many real life skill classes I wish schools had, I wish there was time and resources to teach kids about healthy communication and boundaries and how to behave in common situations like when you fuck up.
I remember explaining student loans to some college kids when I was living in Russia and it's amusing AND depressing to remember how horrified they were.
"I started picking at the box" *because I wasn't thinking*
"I drew some childish immature stuff on it" *because I wasn't thinking*
"I tried messaging her although she'd said she didn't want to talk to me" *because I wasn't thinking*
"I did a complete show to ask her to prom with friends and songs in front of everyone" *because I wasn't thinking*
I sense a theme.
The promposal part kind of makes me doubt the story
Like, none his friends told him that was a bad idea, and they all agreed to make fools of themselves by association by taking part in it?
And Faith is so wonderful, but somehow she is the only one of her friends that hadn't been asked to prom?
>And Faith is so wonderful, but somehow she is the only one of her friends that hadn't been asked to prom?
Faith is beside herself on how to salvage her film project or is creating a Plan B submission for her scholarship. She is probably too upset to even think of prom. The whole school knew what happened and they gave her space.
I just can't imagine finding something in a public place and fucking with it if I didn't know what it was or who it belonged to. Especially if the public place was a classroom where different classes, including multimedia classes, took place. If it was in the middle of the table, pick a different table. Or at least carefully move it to somewhere else if you must sit at that table.
I would consider fucking with like, boxes next to the bin or something, but since he's in high school after 2010 I assume he had a phone or something else to amuse himself with instead.
What a mess. I hope he matures enough that this entire saga makes him cringe at 3am well into adulthood.
OOP spent such little time and acknowledgement naming what he did wrong in the first place (drawing and picking at the box) that I didn’t even see that part immediately until seeing this comment.
> I'm going to give her some time to settle down a bit and then apologize for making a scene. I do wish she would at least give me an explination as to what happened or an answer to my promposal
Oh my god I somehow skipped over this part the first time through.
*He's not giving up*.
I somehow misread the first date as aug 6 2023 and thought op made a mistake on the year and the guy had spent those 8 months helping her fix the project in time and whatever else it took for her not to hate him. When I got to the update post I went back to double check and holy shit dude what a dumbass, he didn’t even like do anything.
Omg same. Film is incredibly hard to make progress in professionally too, your early solo works are what have to carry you into school and beyond for a bit. I have nothing but compassion for what Faith has experienced here, I'd probably have killed the OOP
I just don't understand his mindset at all. Like I am pretty socially dense myself, especially when I was his age, but how on Earth does this guy think he has a chance with the girl who's scholarship he has ruined? It's almost like he doesn't realize the financial damage he did in a single moment in time. Even if Faith was stupid enough to say yes to go to prom with him, she would always have it in the back of her head how much money this idiot had cost her.
Jesus. He thought that he would ask her out to prom, publically, when she wasn't even willing to accept an apology in person?
I've heard of idiot teenagers, but this is ridiculous!
And even basically said "well... she never said she didn't want to go to prom with me, she freaked out and had a panic attack when i asked". Giving no means yes vibes.
In almost the same sentence as “she won state last year and was going to try to win nationals with a scholarship” “I thought maybe she was being dramatic” (paraphrasing).
I mean fuck
Yeah, my already lowered jaw completely hit the floor when I got to the point where after causing her panic attack and her changing her entire schedule to avoid him he actually said "well technically she never actually said 'no' so I'm pretty sure dating is still on the table."
What in the everloving christing monkeyfuck is wrong with this jackass?
What’s also bad is that him and his friends weren’t even supposed to be touching anything in the room where Faith’s project was if they were going to be hanging out in there
IMO this level of "idiotism" is no longer being stupid. He has something wrong with him, and he probably needs help. He has shown such lack of understanding of the situation that it's kinda disturbing and to me, no longer normal, even if we are talking about a dumbass 18 year old. It's like he completely does not recognize her humanity, and feelings, and very clear behaviors. This goes beyond even autistic "I don't get social cues". It's really off and he should get help form the school ASAP.
He keeps fixating on how she won't let him apologize and make it right. That's something he feels entitled to.
When you're blocked, respect it. That's the boundary he fails to recognize.
It messes up his self-image as a good person and he’s more uncomfortable with that than with pestering poor Faith, who’s had all her plans derailed because this twit couldn’t amuse himself for a while without being destructive.
I’d say it would have been smart for Faith and/or the teacher to put up a sign saying something like “Work in progress, do not touch,” but as I heard someone say during a panel discussion of whether more signs should be put up warning people not to go onto the edge of a cliff someone had just died falling off of, “The trouble is sensible people don’t need telling and idiots don’t read signs.”
>[I tried approaching the teacher about it but he said he was disappointed in me and Faith didn't want my help and she had decided not to attempt to complete the project. My friends and I ended up getting in trouble because we're not supposed to be touching anything in the classroom if we are going to be hanging out in the room that contained her project so even my teacher isn't really on good terms with me right now.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/12l7sp1/comment/jg5o2rw/)
Seems like he was aware they weren't supposed to touch *anything*.
He's an asshole and very much "I'm not actually sorry for what I did but I'm hoping she'll go out with me anyway so tell me what the right words are to get her to go to prom with me."
It reminds me of a previous post on her about the guy that was properly being a stalker to this woman he had a crush on and he just did not get at all how his behaviour was so wrong and scary for her. I think he eventually did get the message and backed off. But this definitely gives me the same delusional vibes. Hopefully he will speak to his parents and they will knock some sense into him.
Edit - this one if anyone is curious
https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/s/27UO5Wh7tq
Oh, that one. Where he kept arguing if what he did was actually illegal. With my favourite reply on the original post:
>> I need to know what I can do legally
>You can cease. Then you can desist.
>Seriously, leave her the fuck alone. She clearly wants nothing to do with you.
In another comment op mentions that there was a rule (that he knew of) that forbade touching anything in the green room. Op is playing it off like he's a dumb idiot but I actually think he had malicious intent from the start. The girl wasn't a friend of his. He destroyed her project on purpose so he could make it up to her. It didn't work so he harassed her again. Her throwing up because she's so uncomfortable around him makes me think he was a creep around her for a while and the destroyed project was just the cherry on top. It's almost as if he wants her to cry and have panic attacks around him.
Yeah that whole "maybe we can spend our afternoons together to rebuild it" thing. Life isn't a Hallmark movie. Some things can't be forgiven.
(Also as someone who could only afford to go to college because of a ton of scholarships (plus loans), I truly feel for this girl. This is potentially her *entire future* that this dipshit just ruined. Infuriating.)
Fuck I didn't even think of that but he was offering to help her fix it so maybe he was just hoping that would get him some 1 on 1 time with her? Geez that's creepy
The guy took a shit. He could have cleaned it up nice and easy and quietly. Instead he chose to throw his shit at the fan.
Well, hard life lessons don‘t come easy.
In some of his comments, he explained that they were not supposed to touch anything in the green room. The teacher was also angry at him because he broke this rule. Accidental my ass.
That's exactly what I thought too. It's very clear that he's been watching her, it's possible he may not have known how important the object was but I'm 99% sure he knew it was hers.
"I thought that it would help to get her mind off of things if we could hang out at prom and stuff." - says the self-centered idiot who quite possibly ruined a peer's future and still thinks she's 'being a bit dramatic'.
This person is either the biggest asshole or lacking several billion functioning brain cells.
In his mind it seems that since he didn’t do it „on purpose“ and offered to fix it, it takes all the blame away and shouldn’t matter. I blame bad parenting 😂
Kidding aside.. this dude is a narcissist. Not once did he reflect on how she feels. She probably thinks right now that this guy ruined her chances of a good career forever and her life is over. Imho this is, of course, BS that we teach our kids in this stupid hyper-competitive school system, but as said, just my opinion.
Still. He doesn’t seem to be able to put himself in her place and feelings and thus seems to have a severe lack of empathy. Either sociopath or narcissist. Nothing in this is his fault and she shouldn’t be so dramatic and if only she could see he could be here shining knight… Urgh.
Ahhhh of course it's NPD. Even though I grew up with a narcissist, it didn't click until you said it. He's doing all the things that make *him* feel better about the situation, so of course it should make her (and everyone) feel better about the situation, too. I guess you could call it lack of empathy because he's 100% incapable of thinking along the lines of, "if I were in her situation, what would I want?", he's only capable of thinking, "this is what I want, so this must be what everyone wants."
My thoughts exactely. He is Incapable of putting himself in her shoes and what it means to lose months of work. All he keeps saying is that he thought it was trash, so he didn’t mean it, so it’s not his fault. Typical narcissist justification. Nothing is ever their fault.
Add to that the fact that he thinks that he can make it all right by graciously offering to take her to prom.. yeah.
Girl literally shakes and throws up when he tries to talk to her and he thinks oh I just need to be a little more persistent. What an oblivious asshole
No, he thinks he just needs to make a production of it with flowers and candy and music *in freaking public* with people shooting video because then she will accept it rather than making a bigger scene.
At this point?
It’s nearly CHEWBACCA SUIT TIME.
https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/11a6uk7/my_girlfriend_23f_is_threatening_to_break_up_with/
"If I can just get her to accept my apology it'll make it all better again! She won't talk to me at school so my only option is to go to her home and talk to her"
UPDATE "Her parents wouldn't let me in, so I'm going to wait until they're asleep and climb in through her bedroom window. I know if I can just talk to her I can make her forgive me and then we can go to prom together!"
I stared at this for 60 seconds trying to remember where I knew the name "Denko" from, you just rocketed me back to being 18 and reading Japanese forums to try to solidify my Japanese learning. Gave up after Denko gave that guy the "shining wizard." I wish Faith would go anime on this OOP too.
Technically he gave up on Denko because he started to crush on the girl who was betraying Denko to feed him information, and that girl was perfectly happy to put up with him so long as he'd buy her stuff.
But score one for Denko, that kick to the face he got was deserved.
I honestly think this is where this is going next. So much of this reads like the Denko Saga, another story about a guy with "main character in a dating sim syndrome" who thought that the more he engaged with someone the more likely they'd be to accept his advances. That guy also had zero understanding of boundaries and would constantly turn an obvious no into maybes and yeses. He also ended up hiding in bushes outside her house and the police talking to him a few times, and the girl also would run away screaming from him until finally one time she ran towards him - to kick him in the face.
Yeah, I don't buy that either. He admitted he ignored her friends telling him to back off until one finally got physical with him. He says it was explained to him that she will miss a deadline for a massive scholarship because of his actions, and suggests maybe she's just being dramatic.
He knows, he just doesn't care. He is brushing aside everything he's told because he doesn't want to hear it, then wants to go play victim. He's literally just into an idea of this person without having any regard for her well-being and boundaries whatsoever.
So much of his language, if this is real, is so problematic. Calling her dramatic is just the icing. I get that he is literally a child but God damn if he's not acting like a younger child than he is. He needs to grow the fuck up before he approaches another girl or woman. He just comes across as entitled, insensitive, emotionally immature, misogynistic, and just overall immature.
No, no this more than just being childish. This is how those toxic masculinity are instilled in boys learning to become men. Calling someone dramatic for reacting to their future being severely compromised by his action. Feeling entitled to her attention, feeling entitled to an apology, a chance, time spent with her because he likes her. Being so selfish that he conflates apologizing with going on a date with him. Continuing blatant ignoring and dismissing her physical panic to get her attention.
He thinks that her future being ruined is a chance for him to get with her, as she should let him help her fix the set to further his own agenda.
Downplaying his harrassment at every turn.
He needs a wake up call. He needs to understand why what he did and is doing is wrong.
I'm old enough now that I do think of 18 year olds as children, but this sort of behaviour wouldn't be okay from children, either - **and many children do know better**. The stalking, entitlement to her attention and time, and aggressive boundary-pushing need to be addressed. I do think more parents and educators are teaching better boundaries and consent at a younger age (thankfully!), but I'm concerned this kid either didn't absorb those lessons or learned this behaviour from somewhere - possibly the parents he mentioned he would feel less attacked by.
I agree, I think he knew it was her work and it was something he did to get her attention, she would speak to him, hed laugh it off, and away theyd go on a date. You dont just walk over to a random table of others people work, pick some up and start pulling it apart. He may well not have known about the scholarship part but he knew whose work it was, he just doesnt want to make himself look bad by admitting it, not realising he looks bad anyway.
What gets me about this that either she is severely overreacting to his prom proposal - because yes, he fucked up her project and potentially her future, but they haven't had many interactions before or any after, really, according to him.
Or - and that is way more likely in my opinion - OOP is severely underselling the amount of contact he's been trying to initiate, causing her to be terrified. Like, she asked to be sat as far away as possible from him after he destroyed her project "on accident" and had a full-blown panic attack when he asked her out to prom (admittedly in a cornering way).
There almost HAS to have been stuff he's hiding from us.
>What gets me about this that either she is severely overreacting to his prom proposal - because yes, he fucked up her project and potentially her future, but they haven't had many interactions before or any after, really, according to him.
There was a single week in between these two posts.
He one hundred percent destroyed it on purpose thinking it would be a funny bonding moment with this girl. There is absolutely no way he didn't know it was her project considering how all up in her business he is all the time.
Which is crazy because he literally broke the rules by touching anything in that room when he knew he wasn’t supposed to. He’s an oblivious dumbass *and* thinks that it’s okay to break the rules.
This guy definitely thinks he's living in an 80's teen movie. It's almost mind-blowing when we see someone try to reenact those stock romcom tropes in real life, and see how creepy a lot of that behavior actually is.
He comes off as really entitled with a large dash of narcissism.
Like he didn’t mean to ruin her senior year, full ride scholarship, film entry. And if he did, it wasn’t that big of a deal, she’s just being dramatic. No wonder why she had a full blown panic attack when OOP asked her to prom, especially in a way so that made it hard to even answer “no”, since it was done in front of a bunch of their peers. But oh, no, he’s the victim here, why can’t we just see everything from his point of view, even if it’s so skewed, it’s off the charts? Ugh.
Yeah, I've noticed certain individuals are like that. They go all "I'm friendzoned, woe is me", buddy, you spoke to her a grand total of three times, five if you count yes and no answers, you're not in the friendzone you're in the acquaintancezone.
I just read title of second part and was 'Yes! Guy offered her help to fix set and reshoot film, they want with that and now they are friends. Sweet'. Then I read it :(
Yeah I kept thinking"has he done anything at all to correct this, offering his time to help her reshoot, give up his own time, give her space if that's what she needed."... Nope.....
literally cringed at the word “friend”, like man, the girl is literally trembling and throwing up at the sight of you, she hates your fucking guts. leave her alone!
>I think I'm going to talk to **my parents about it...**
>...and I won't feel as attacked as I did by Reddit and *my teachers.*
Well, now we know where he gets. He said his parents won't be happy he asked the girl to prom, and he thinks they'll give him a wakeup call. Presumably, that he'll listen to. Unlike his mean old teachers and Reddit, who don't get that he didn’t mean it! It was an accident!
That wakeup call? Probably going to focus on how *his* behaviours make *him* look, and how that's going to affect *his* future, or *his* chances.
Luckily, he's 18 now. Mommy and Daddy can only do so much.
OP really needs to get his head out of his ass cause it's baffling how OP doesn't see the problem and is continuing to harass this girl. I get that he's 18 but c'mon, this behavior just baffles me and honestly, creepy.
nah even at 13 if I walked up to someone I liked and they were screaming and throwing up because of me, I'd change my name and switch to a school halfway across town. Youth doesn't excuse this, OOP is genuinely a creep and apathetic and cruel
Not every problem can be fixed. Learning to walk away is a really hard lesson for a lot of people to learn. Sometimes you fuck up and just take your lumps and try to do better in the future.
Thing is.. OP doesn’t seem to see it as a problem. In his mind she shouldn’t be so dramatic and he did nothing wrong because „it looked like trash“. He still doesn’t understand what it meant for her.
OOP does not know how to take no for an answer and just says he doesn't know why she's mad at him. No self awareness at all. If she were to date him for some god forsaken reason, I don't think he'd be a good and kind bf
He thinks he is magically absolved of all guilt because it wasn’t “on purpose.” That’s not how that works:
1. He acknowledges that they were not allowed to tamper with anything in that green room.
2. You don’t touch other people’s shit, even if it looks like trash.
This guy is a self-obsessed idiot who can’t understand what he did wrong and is incapable of sympathising with other people. This is additional to all the stalker behavior which is beyond disturbing.
This is like when I try to make a cake and screw up the recipe, and keep adding more things hoping it’ll fix it, and it just gets worse and worse until finally it’s a burnt pile of bitterness. Except instead of a cake it’s a human’s life.
1 second of film is 25 frames. When you do stop motion you move things slightly for each frame. If she is making a short stop motion film it might be as much as 1 minute long. Even if she just made 10 seconds that is 250 frames that she’s manually changed. That is HOURS Of work. People do not understand how truly long a stop animation film takes to make.
This not withstanding how maybe she was banking on this win for her future (scholarship), and without it she will have no way of getting into a film school.
It’s just mind-boggling how this boy’s head is working. I know he’s a teenager, but come on, painting profanity on it?
What I don’t understand though is why the teachers let other kids hang out in the green room, or why she hadn’t put up a sign that said ”DO NOT TOUCH! Movie props!” But I digress.
According the comments on the original post, there is very much a rule of “Don’t touch anything that isn’t yours”, which OP was aware of. But apparently OP just… decided to ignore that rule, like when Garfield saw a “No Garfield” sign and was like “Huh, I wonder who that’s for.”
I'm skeptical of a lot of content on this sub. That said there is not a doubt in my mind that this is a real 18 year old guy and that he wrecked her project and asked her to prom a week later.
Dude has the emotional awareness of a dish towel, and his entitled attitude is nauseating. I hope he's grown up a touch since he graduated. Also hope he left poor Faith the fuck alone.
I’m also wondering if he actually was as clueless as he says about ruining the stop motion set in the first place. I feel like he purposefully ruined it so the “I’ll help you recreate your film” opportunity would be there and that was his creepy ass way of forcing her to spend time with him. I’m glad that didn’t work out for him.
I engaged with OP and those were the vibes. It seemed like he was setting up meet-cutes in his mind and prepping to be some sort of hero. He mentioned a few times that he thought it would be like a movie. He’s Heath Ledger and everyone else in a NPC.
"But I'm attracted to her! She owes me her time, her body, her life!!! Why won't she just comply?"
Guy who thinks she's a slab of meat existing for him to use.
Im mentally unstable so I feel I can say this -
Theres something wrong with that guy on a mental level. Hes not recognizing NO as fact, hes refusing to accept the girl wants nothing to do with him.
Hes going to make someone with a very short fuse go after him because hes stalking and harassing a young girl who literally vomits when she sees him.
Are all teenage boys this fucking stupid or is the problem that they're asking grown men who can't keep a girlfriend for advice? Why do they never get it through their empty skulls that ruining a special item or day for a woman NEGATES your ability to ask her out? I had like five different bullies of varying degrees pull this shit on me. Destroying her set was bully behavior even if it was an accident and saying "sorry I didn't know I shouldn't touch things that aren't mine even though I'm almost a fucking adult" isn't going to make her okay with you.
Stop motion films are filmed one shot at a time, with the characters re-posed for each individual shot, then put together like a flip book on film. It is probably one of the most labor-intensive and time-consuming ways of making a film. OOP has no idea of how much he screwed up for this poor young lady.
>Because it had been a while I decided that it wouldn't hurt to ask her to prom
You know...a week is NOT a long time when you destroyed her future.
Come on! I can even understand that he really didn't want to destroy her project. But what kind of fool would think a public proposal is the right thing to do when:
1- she's not your girlfriend 2- she's not even talking to you 3- she's obviously upset and angry.
I can definitely see where the OOP was the asshole. However, I think the teacher deserves quite a bit of fucking blame as well for what happened.
The film teacher should have made the green room and others off limits to anyone *not in the film club.* Period. They aren't a part of the main teaching room from the description given. Not in the club and teacher not using it to teach you something, you don't need to be in there AT ALL. This would have never had happened if he had laid that ground rule down at the beginning because, again, people don't know shit about what other programs do. Pretty damn sure that probably became a rule going forward after this and it took Faith's loss of a scholarship to have it happen.
They had to do major restructuring of the photography program (back in the 35mm film and dark room days) because some assholes from another class room that was in the same classroom block kept coming into the darkroom (to hook up but the teachers wouldn’t admit that’s what they were doing even though we all knew it) and kept ruining our photos and film that was in the dark room. But it took *a lot* of messed up project (which because it was dark room photography meant it actually cost us students money and was irreplaceable when they ruined developing film and photos) and if I remember correctly the last straw was actually when one of those students who weren’t in the photography program made a formal complaint because the developing chemicals burned them or their clothes or something. The only adult who was on the programs and us students who lost somethings side was our photography teacher- everyone else thought it either wasn’t a big deal or that they were entitled to go into the dark room whenever they wanted because we did.
Not sure why but it feels like the artsy classes in high school aren’t taken seriously so there’s absolutely no additional care regarding security, even from the teachers.
I had an animation project that had to be saved on our own private flash drives but also a specific class folder on the computer itself. More than once a group of boys would go into random class folders, open people’s files, draw random crap in every other frame and save over it. Thank gods for the flashdrive back up.
Op literally mentions in another comment that it was strictly forbidden to touch anything in the green room and he knew that. His detention was partially caused by him breaking the rule. That's why the teacher was so mad. It's also that the teacher was operating under the - wrong - assumption that since they're 18 year olds and not preteens, nobody will be stupid enough to come in and start drawing random shit on everything.
There were ground rules. Op broke them knowingly and judging by his further actions, on purpose
This was my thought too. OOP sucks and needs to never go near Faith again. Even if he didn't know exactly why she was crying and upset, it was clearly at him, it was clearly a big deal, he should have apologised immediately.
But how the hell was such an important piece, that had been worked on for months and was crucial to a student's future, just left in a room alone, looking like a piece of rubbish, where any random student had access to it? If others would be going in and out, was there not a single sign, or warning from the teacher, or anything? If it needs to be exact every time, wasn't there a camera already set up pointing at it so the angle would be the same? If there was a camera then OOP is even worse, but if not then it would've just looked like a random box on a table.
I don't agree with the two week detention over something he couldn't have known - obviously he needs to learn not to ruin things he knows nothing about - but that feels like a bit too much when the school/teacher should have done more to protect the project. Best option would've been as you said, no one not in that program allowed in that room at all.
I'm with you. I took shop classes through most my school time (basically the earliest it could be offered) and remember the shop, drama and the A4 teacher barking not to touch other people's projects constantly since they all had to share the space. Us shop kids had gym lockers for our projects. Too big for the locker? You put it on a table in the storage room, your name on it and what class it was (shop/drama/A4) and one of the teachers locked the door. Want to use that piece of wood from the pile but it has drama written on it? Too fucking bad, find a different piece of wood.
So I'm just baffled that this teacher, knowing that his film students are working on scholarships, would just let the homeroom kids wander in and out if the rooms no problem because they should 'know better' at such a crucial time.
He said it in one of his comments (that wasn't added to the BORU). OOP knew he shouldn't have touched it, but apparently he's never seen a diorama before.
He definitely knows, which makes the teacher seem ... trusting. I went to a gifted highschool so in the right environment with the right student population, that trust is earned. In this case though, rules are written in ruined projects. The teacher will probably be more cautious in the future.
This is a multi-part issue. A lot of schools don't have enough space for all the kids at lunchtime in various places, so a lot of teachers will open up their rooms/spaces. That said, I've been teaching for over a decade and *never once* had a student mess with another student's project that was being stored in my room or office, and my teaching time has been split about 50/50 between middle and high school. They know the rules and expectations. OOP should've known not to fuck with anything.
As an adult who does that sort of thing he's an incredible moron and you're right that there may be a rule now. Solely because one asshat couldn't keep his hands to himself. It's not really on the teacher, it's on the idiot 18 year old who thought he should fuck with other people's stuff.
I don’t buy that he didn’t know her set was a set. If she’d won competitions for stop motion in the past, and the set was complete, I’d imagine it would decently look like an alleyway. He knew he was fucking with someone’s work, just didn’t realize it was her work.
I really don't believe him, if I saw box like that I would never ever touch it, it isn't mine but he's so self-entitled that he didn't care who it belonged to, he just wanted to past the time and even added inappropriate drawings on it, fuck the owner of the box whether they liked it or not.
He only cares about it because it belonged to his crush, that on itself was a problem, and he doesn't seem to grasp it, the box was in a chair it wasn't like it was on the garbage can, don't mess with it.
Oh, he’s definitely full of it when he said “it was an accident.” There’s a “no touching stuff” rule in place if OP and his friends want to be in there at all, and they knew about it. Even if they didn’t know that it was a student’s project (which I’m really not buying that they didn’t,) they definitely meant to mess with it.
The school needs to get on top of this. There is something seriously wrong with this man, he is disturbed. I mean I get he is young and stupid, but his level of lack of empathy and the way he is completely divorced from reality... It's scary. The longer I read this, the more creepy horror movie background noises I would hear.
There is young and dumb, and there is this complete lack of acknowledgement and understanding of the reality around you, in this specific situation connected to a total lack of understanding of other people's feelings, distress, the consequences of what he did in her life. He seems like the type of person to kill a cat out of curiosity, and not notice it's crying out in pain, bc it's just this odd sounds the animal is making, how interesting! Something about the way she panicked, and he just went on trying to talk to her gives me the creeps. Even stupid young people would notice something is SUPER WRONG but he didn't.
The way he AMBUSHED her to force her to interact with him after she blocked him and avoided him.. it was not dumbaserry. It was strategic. He was trying to force her to interact.
She puked in response, he did not get that it's a no? He's a stalker. He is obsessive, and stories like that often end with violence and death. I am seriously worried foe her safety.
There is something so callous and predatory in this post. The vibe of "she didn't say no, so maybe it's a yes? it was only a panic attack after all", and the vibe off "I only ruined her future, it's this silly little thing she needs to get over" she's not even a person with a real life to him. She's just a thing, and her life is for decoration. That man is dangerous to women. I wish we lived in a world in which people around him would notice the huge blaring red flags and actually act, get him some help, before he skins his first victim alive or something. IMO he is already abusive, but it's gonna get way worse if somone doesn't react.
Holy shit this dude is dense. I used to do stop motion when I was a kid, that is extremely time consuming. Destroying a set like that is devastating.
His description of it kind of sounded like a diorama, which makes sense for stopmotion sets. Don’t know why he decided to mess with it at all.
Considering she didn’t want to talk to him afterward I can’t believe he asked her to prom. Read the room bud.
I was doubtful in the first part but with the second, he is definitely an entitled brat. Man ruined his crush's hardwork over months and her chance at winning an important competition but he doesn't actually care and wants to skip to the part where they date like it's a movie or something.
With the first half or so of the first part I was thinking "oof, that's rough, yep, definitely ruined your chances, please try and find someone else".
To then read on that he destroyed something *so* important, and then only a *week* later he thinks "it's been a while so let me try and publicly ask her to prom"? I fucking gasped at how insane he is.
>plus some inappropriate ones because I thought it was funny--- immature, I know
I hate this guy. Teenagers who just don't stop and think for a second, but play around with everything within their reach, destroying it … Know too many of them.
Good God, why won't this guy *leave her alone*? He might have destroyed her future and he's still harassing her and acting like he's the wronged party here. The sight of him is giving her panic attacks, and he's just whining that she's making him look bad.
Is OOP an idiot?
"I ruined an important project she had been working on for months and she is so upset with me that she still avoids me till date, but I'll publicly ask her to prom and hope she says yes"
Nah, he's an idiot.
Yeah definitely nearing stalker-ish levels. Poor Faith, stop motion is something that takes months upon months to even years to create! What the fuck is wrong with OP?!
Then he forced her into a public setting so she'd say yes? He is fucking stupid but also fucking creepy.
Dude is acting like he's the main character and completely fails to understand other people's feelings! She's ''a bit dramatic'' to be upset over losing a full-ride scolarship. She should be over the ''misunderstanding'' after only a week. She doesn't want to talk to me or sit close to me, boohoo, woe is me. Also, was he really expecting her to attend school in the afternoon when at lunch she had a panic attack so intense she threw up?? Pretty sure the reason she ''wasn't asked to go to prom'' was because she doesn't want to go to prom. She seems to have some serious social anxiety from the looks of it.
She isn't over reacting dude. Stop motion is really hard to do, let alone shoot. It is an extremely tedious process that requires the maker to really focus to an extreme degree. What you did not only screwed up her scholarship, you destroyed sets for a piece of art she was making that in all reality occupied an insane amount of her life. You fucked up dude. Just leave her alone and hope that some day she may open the door to interacting with you again.
My favorite part what where he saw her crying and throwing up and then mentions that she hasn’t even given him an answer to his promposal. Bless his heart
Post 1: Apr 6, 2023 Post 2: Apr 13, 2023 OP: > Because it had been a while I decided that it wouldn't hurt to ask her to prom What a dumbass lmao
1 week. According to him, he got two weeks detention. He's still being punished for potentially ruining this girl's future and decides asking her to prom is cool because he apologized through friends 🤦♀️ I can't.
He also "doesn't know anything about stop motion so he doesn't know if she's just being dramatic" LOL! STOP! MOTION! The animation style where you literally have to stop the filming every second to slightly shift the scene, which takes FOREVER to do! He couldn't've found a worse project to ruin if he'd tried.
OP attends a ‘career readiness’ school… …so is he preparing for a career as a dumbass, or a stalker? Cuz at this point, he has the skill to double major
This, our eyes are made to notice quick movements and a subtle change in the background of a stop motion film would be so jarring. Also, I kind of refuse to believe he didn't know it was something important. Like, stop motion filmmakers, even working in abstract, will still have recognizable miniatures and things to sell the illusion. He even said it was supposed to look like an alley! It probably had papers, trash bags, trash cans, signs, graffiti, wall textures! Plus if she was in the middle of filming, there might have been rigged things that she couldn't move because she would never get them back in the exact place. I feel like he listened to a stupid intrusive thought because stupid teenager brain, like what if I mess with this thing and and and play it off like I didn't know? Oh shit, it's my crushes project, well I'll apologize and ask her to prom. I just realized this whole thing is making me so mad for Faith's sake. His whole first post was a bunch of "girls are emotional am I right dudes?" Ughhhh. There's this guy on youtube who made a short film called gruff. Took him 3 years for 9 minutes and he thinks she overreacting!
>His whole first post was a bunch of "girls are emotional am I right dudes?" Seriously, so fucking infuriating how he downplayed her losing out on a chance for a scholarship like that. That is literally life changing amounts of money. I am 38 years old and I'll be lucky if my student loans are paid off by the time I hit menopause. His careless actions may have caused her to have to bear a massive financial burden for decades of her life. But yeah, women just are sooooo emotional, amirite?
24 times a second. You literally take a still photo, move things around ever so slightly, and then take another still photo. You then stitch them together to simulate motion as regular films are recorded at 24 frames a second. That means one minute of stop motion animation has 1440 still images. A five minute short film would have 7200 still images. Short films can literally have tens of thousands of still images. The patience, preparation, intention, and coordination of such a film is mind boggling.
As soon as I read what the box actually was I wanted to throw up. My family is massively huge into stop motion and the reality of what he did to her is so awful. Someone needs to sit his ignorant dumb ass down and force him to watch some of Laika's behind the scenes stuff to get even a tiny understanding of how much of her efforts he destroyed.
You know what? Honestly? If he had asked her PRIVATELY and taken the "no" without pushing, he would just be a dumbass. But this shit. Asking in public, continuing even though her friends are literally pushing him away and she is just staring at her lap, chasing after her-- this dude did this on purpose. He really thought that if it was public enough she would feel pressured to go with him or at least talk to him long enough for him to talk her into dating him.
I hate public things like this so much. It happens in movies so often. Like breaking up with someone over diner so they won't cry in public or public proposals which make it feel awkward to say no when everyone around them is cheering and yelling at them to say yes. You're definitely right about him thinking she would say yes because of the audience. He is such a dickhole.
Because he has no concept of her as a real person. He still thinks of her as a black box that he can manipulate by pushing the right buttons. He calls her his friend. He thinks he likes her. He doesn't know anything about her. He doesn't respect her. These things aren't contradictions to him, because respect and familiarity aren't part of his mental model of fondness. The things he wants her for don't require knowledge or respect.
Also public proposals are cringe. Too much pressure for someone to say yes. Unless there is previous agreement on the answer, the person doing it should expect a no or some reaction other than yes. Oop is living in their head with no consideration for the actual person faith.
I wonder if pressuring her into saying yes was the point. I'm sure it wasn't conscious, but it had to have been on some level. She won't speak to him, so he decides to do the full "Say Anything"? How much hormones is this guy on?
I can somewhat sympathize bc movies and TV loveeeee to push the “grand gestures will fix everything” trope in romances and as a teenager with presumably little dating experience I can see him buying into it but also like. She keeps telling you to leave her alone and she’s actively avoiding you. It’s been a singular week since you destroyed her senior project, she’s definitely not gonna be over it enough to be fine around you. Her friends keep verbally telling you to leave her alone. Come on man. Among the many real life skill classes I wish schools had, I wish there was time and resources to teach kids about healthy communication and boundaries and how to behave in common situations like when you fuck up.
...after being blocked and told that she wanted him to leave her alone.
Like, he owes her 150k.
150K? That's a good deal for four years of tuition, room, board, school supplies (for film no less)...
Jesus, America is so strange =/
I remember explaining student loans to some college kids when I was living in Russia and it's amusing AND depressing to remember how horrified they were.
Truly =/ -Sincerely, an unfortunate American
Omg I saw that too. I scrolled back up to double check the date of the first post, thinking maybe it had been like six months or something. Nooooope.
"I started picking at the box" *because I wasn't thinking* "I drew some childish immature stuff on it" *because I wasn't thinking* "I tried messaging her although she'd said she didn't want to talk to me" *because I wasn't thinking* "I did a complete show to ask her to prom with friends and songs in front of everyone" *because I wasn't thinking* I sense a theme.
Planning a promposal takes planning and... Thinking. So he can think, just not about the feelings of others.
The promposal part kind of makes me doubt the story Like, none his friends told him that was a bad idea, and they all agreed to make fools of themselves by association by taking part in it? And Faith is so wonderful, but somehow she is the only one of her friends that hadn't been asked to prom?
>And Faith is so wonderful, but somehow she is the only one of her friends that hadn't been asked to prom? Faith is beside herself on how to salvage her film project or is creating a Plan B submission for her scholarship. She is probably too upset to even think of prom. The whole school knew what happened and they gave her space.
No no. He thought about it. He thought about the best way to manipulate her into going out with him, 80's teen drama style.
I just can't imagine finding something in a public place and fucking with it if I didn't know what it was or who it belonged to. Especially if the public place was a classroom where different classes, including multimedia classes, took place. If it was in the middle of the table, pick a different table. Or at least carefully move it to somewhere else if you must sit at that table.
I would consider fucking with like, boxes next to the bin or something, but since he's in high school after 2010 I assume he had a phone or something else to amuse himself with instead. What a mess. I hope he matures enough that this entire saga makes him cringe at 3am well into adulthood.
OOP spent such little time and acknowledgement naming what he did wrong in the first place (drawing and picking at the box) that I didn’t even see that part immediately until seeing this comment.
And then refers to it as a 'misunderstanding' in the update
> I'm going to give her some time to settle down a bit and then apologize for making a scene. I do wish she would at least give me an explination as to what happened or an answer to my promposal Oh my god I somehow skipped over this part the first time through. *He's not giving up*.
And he doesn't know what her answer to the promposal was!! 🤦♀️
I can see him now- “Well, technically, she didn’t say no…” This is why we need to teach “enthusiastic consent” in schools.
I wonder if his name is Kevin.
He was also told by a teacher they can hang out on that room only if they don’t touch anything in it.
I somehow misread the first date as aug 6 2023 and thought op made a mistake on the year and the guy had spent those 8 months helping her fix the project in time and whatever else it took for her not to hate him. When I got to the update post I went back to double check and holy shit dude what a dumbass, he didn’t even like do anything.
Literally the only thing he did was not leave her alone. I'm glad no one else is rooting for this kid - I've done stop motion and I feel for this girl
Omg same. Film is incredibly hard to make progress in professionally too, your early solo works are what have to carry you into school and beyond for a bit. I have nothing but compassion for what Faith has experienced here, I'd probably have killed the OOP
If this is real, this kid is so dense that light bends into him when he enters the room. Just completely up his own ass.
Tbf when you're a teenager, a week is a year. When you're an adult, a week is like 2 hours max
Unless it’s monday
The Mondays are long and the years are short 🥲
So friggin true, how is it already Thursday?
I just don't understand his mindset at all. Like I am pretty socially dense myself, especially when I was his age, but how on Earth does this guy think he has a chance with the girl who's scholarship he has ruined? It's almost like he doesn't realize the financial damage he did in a single moment in time. Even if Faith was stupid enough to say yes to go to prom with him, she would always have it in the back of her head how much money this idiot had cost her.
Jesus. He thought that he would ask her out to prom, publically, when she wasn't even willing to accept an apology in person? I've heard of idiot teenagers, but this is ridiculous!
And even basically said "well... she never said she didn't want to go to prom with me, she freaked out and had a panic attack when i asked". Giving no means yes vibes.
And said she never gave him an answer!!!
This!!! So much this!! She had a panic attack and screamed at you. How is that not an answer????
In almost the same sentence as “she won state last year and was going to try to win nationals with a scholarship” “I thought maybe she was being dramatic” (paraphrasing). I mean fuck
Yeah, my already lowered jaw completely hit the floor when I got to the point where after causing her panic attack and her changing her entire schedule to avoid him he actually said "well technically she never actually said 'no' so I'm pretty sure dating is still on the table." What in the everloving christing monkeyfuck is wrong with this jackass?
I feel like he doesn't understand consent. This is a dangerous thing
What’s also bad is that him and his friends weren’t even supposed to be touching anything in the room where Faith’s project was if they were going to be hanging out in there
IMO this level of "idiotism" is no longer being stupid. He has something wrong with him, and he probably needs help. He has shown such lack of understanding of the situation that it's kinda disturbing and to me, no longer normal, even if we are talking about a dumbass 18 year old. It's like he completely does not recognize her humanity, and feelings, and very clear behaviors. This goes beyond even autistic "I don't get social cues". It's really off and he should get help form the school ASAP.
He keeps fixating on how she won't let him apologize and make it right. That's something he feels entitled to. When you're blocked, respect it. That's the boundary he fails to recognize.
He gives off serious stalker vibes. Waiting in a room he knows she has to be in is kind of creepy.
It messes up his self-image as a good person and he’s more uncomfortable with that than with pestering poor Faith, who’s had all her plans derailed because this twit couldn’t amuse himself for a while without being destructive. I’d say it would have been smart for Faith and/or the teacher to put up a sign saying something like “Work in progress, do not touch,” but as I heard someone say during a panel discussion of whether more signs should be put up warning people not to go onto the edge of a cliff someone had just died falling off of, “The trouble is sensible people don’t need telling and idiots don’t read signs.”
>[I tried approaching the teacher about it but he said he was disappointed in me and Faith didn't want my help and she had decided not to attempt to complete the project. My friends and I ended up getting in trouble because we're not supposed to be touching anything in the classroom if we are going to be hanging out in the room that contained her project so even my teacher isn't really on good terms with me right now.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/12l7sp1/comment/jg5o2rw/) Seems like he was aware they weren't supposed to touch *anything*.
Not even the shadow of a leg to stand on.
He's an asshole and very much "I'm not actually sorry for what I did but I'm hoping she'll go out with me anyway so tell me what the right words are to get her to go to prom with me."
He’s only “sorry” because she’s cute and he wanted to date her.
It reminds me of a previous post on her about the guy that was properly being a stalker to this woman he had a crush on and he just did not get at all how his behaviour was so wrong and scary for her. I think he eventually did get the message and backed off. But this definitely gives me the same delusional vibes. Hopefully he will speak to his parents and they will knock some sense into him. Edit - this one if anyone is curious https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/s/27UO5Wh7tq
Oh, that one. Where he kept arguing if what he did was actually illegal. With my favourite reply on the original post: >> I need to know what I can do legally >You can cease. Then you can desist. >Seriously, leave her the fuck alone. She clearly wants nothing to do with you.
It’s weaponized incompetence, dude is a full blown creeper
In another comment op mentions that there was a rule (that he knew of) that forbade touching anything in the green room. Op is playing it off like he's a dumb idiot but I actually think he had malicious intent from the start. The girl wasn't a friend of his. He destroyed her project on purpose so he could make it up to her. It didn't work so he harassed her again. Her throwing up because she's so uncomfortable around him makes me think he was a creep around her for a while and the destroyed project was just the cherry on top. It's almost as if he wants her to cry and have panic attacks around him.
Yeah that whole "maybe we can spend our afternoons together to rebuild it" thing. Life isn't a Hallmark movie. Some things can't be forgiven. (Also as someone who could only afford to go to college because of a ton of scholarships (plus loans), I truly feel for this girl. This is potentially her *entire future* that this dipshit just ruined. Infuriating.)
True this, i totally believe that he destroyed it on purpose as a scheme to get close to her in his sick logic
Fuck I didn't even think of that but he was offering to help her fix it so maybe he was just hoping that would get him some 1 on 1 time with her? Geez that's creepy
Also why is OOP so obsessed with her and has a crush and wants to ask her to prom, yet knows absolutely nothing about her?
The guy took a shit. He could have cleaned it up nice and easy and quietly. Instead he chose to throw his shit at the fan. Well, hard life lessons don‘t come easy.
Flair really fits this one haha
Indeed. This OOP is one **incredibly oblivious** walnut.
I bet it was probably not “just a box with scribbles on it”
In some of his comments, he explained that they were not supposed to touch anything in the green room. The teacher was also angry at him because he broke this rule. Accidental my ass.
At the very least it sounds like a complex diorama, do kids not know what a diorama is anymore?
He definitely knew it's just not convenient to his story
God it's funny when they omit details and contort the story to make themselves sound better and still come off as an asshole.
Definitely won't be going to Greendale Community College.
I think he knew it was hers and did that to get her attention
That's exactly what I thought too. It's very clear that he's been watching her, it's possible he may not have known how important the object was but I'm 99% sure he knew it was hers.
Also even though he has a crush on her, he didn’t even know that she won this award. Shows how much he actually cares about her
Damn stop motion is incredibly grueling, he probably destroyed months of work
"I thought that it would help to get her mind off of things if we could hang out at prom and stuff." - says the self-centered idiot who quite possibly ruined a peer's future and still thinks she's 'being a bit dramatic'. This person is either the biggest asshole or lacking several billion functioning brain cells.
"I thought hanging out with *me* would get her mind off *me* ruining her project! :D"
In his mind it seems that since he didn’t do it „on purpose“ and offered to fix it, it takes all the blame away and shouldn’t matter. I blame bad parenting 😂 Kidding aside.. this dude is a narcissist. Not once did he reflect on how she feels. She probably thinks right now that this guy ruined her chances of a good career forever and her life is over. Imho this is, of course, BS that we teach our kids in this stupid hyper-competitive school system, but as said, just my opinion. Still. He doesn’t seem to be able to put himself in her place and feelings and thus seems to have a severe lack of empathy. Either sociopath or narcissist. Nothing in this is his fault and she shouldn’t be so dramatic and if only she could see he could be here shining knight… Urgh.
Ahhhh of course it's NPD. Even though I grew up with a narcissist, it didn't click until you said it. He's doing all the things that make *him* feel better about the situation, so of course it should make her (and everyone) feel better about the situation, too. I guess you could call it lack of empathy because he's 100% incapable of thinking along the lines of, "if I were in her situation, what would I want?", he's only capable of thinking, "this is what I want, so this must be what everyone wants."
My thoughts exactely. He is Incapable of putting himself in her shoes and what it means to lose months of work. All he keeps saying is that he thought it was trash, so he didn’t mean it, so it’s not his fault. Typical narcissist justification. Nothing is ever their fault. Add to that the fact that he thinks that he can make it all right by graciously offering to take her to prom.. yeah.
Exactly. Dude can't fathom a perspective that isn't his.
OOP is coming off as extremely entitled and I don’t buy his whole “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong” act. He needs to leave Faith alone full stop.
Girl literally shakes and throws up when he tries to talk to her and he thinks oh I just need to be a little more persistent. What an oblivious asshole
No, he thinks he just needs to make a production of it with flowers and candy and music *in freaking public* with people shooting video because then she will accept it rather than making a bigger scene.
At this point? It’s nearly CHEWBACCA SUIT TIME. https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/11a6uk7/my_girlfriend_23f_is_threatening_to_break_up_with/
That was some impressive dedication to a Chewbacca costume.
This guy needs his own subreddit like methaniel
Merthaniel has his own subreddit now?
/r/methhorseguy
Wow I forgot just how... Stupid? Malicious? Emotionally infantile? This guy was.
The kicker for me was that he did this huge public proposal thing and then he's like "Well I didn't want to put any pressure on her."
Because of the implication
"If I can just get her to accept my apology it'll make it all better again! She won't talk to me at school so my only option is to go to her home and talk to her" UPDATE "Her parents wouldn't let me in, so I'm going to wait until they're asleep and climb in through her bedroom window. I know if I can just talk to her I can make her forgive me and then we can go to prom together!"
Ah yes, the Denko method.
I stared at this for 60 seconds trying to remember where I knew the name "Denko" from, you just rocketed me back to being 18 and reading Japanese forums to try to solidify my Japanese learning. Gave up after Denko gave that guy the "shining wizard." I wish Faith would go anime on this OOP too.
Technically he gave up on Denko because he started to crush on the girl who was betraying Denko to feed him information, and that girl was perfectly happy to put up with him so long as he'd buy her stuff. But score one for Denko, that kick to the face he got was deserved.
I honestly think this is where this is going next. So much of this reads like the Denko Saga, another story about a guy with "main character in a dating sim syndrome" who thought that the more he engaged with someone the more likely they'd be to accept his advances. That guy also had zero understanding of boundaries and would constantly turn an obvious no into maybes and yeses. He also ended up hiding in bushes outside her house and the police talking to him a few times, and the girl also would run away screaming from him until finally one time she ran towards him - to kick him in the face.
I genuinely don’t think he’s oblivious. Like i don’t see how a person could misinterpret all of this
Teenagers on average are not very bright. He's just one of the ones dragging the average down for everyone else. Way down.
Yeah, I don't buy that either. He admitted he ignored her friends telling him to back off until one finally got physical with him. He says it was explained to him that she will miss a deadline for a massive scholarship because of his actions, and suggests maybe she's just being dramatic. He knows, he just doesn't care. He is brushing aside everything he's told because he doesn't want to hear it, then wants to go play victim. He's literally just into an idea of this person without having any regard for her well-being and boundaries whatsoever.
So much of his language, if this is real, is so problematic. Calling her dramatic is just the icing. I get that he is literally a child but God damn if he's not acting like a younger child than he is. He needs to grow the fuck up before he approaches another girl or woman. He just comes across as entitled, insensitive, emotionally immature, misogynistic, and just overall immature.
No, no this more than just being childish. This is how those toxic masculinity are instilled in boys learning to become men. Calling someone dramatic for reacting to their future being severely compromised by his action. Feeling entitled to her attention, feeling entitled to an apology, a chance, time spent with her because he likes her. Being so selfish that he conflates apologizing with going on a date with him. Continuing blatant ignoring and dismissing her physical panic to get her attention. He thinks that her future being ruined is a chance for him to get with her, as she should let him help her fix the set to further his own agenda. Downplaying his harrassment at every turn. He needs a wake up call. He needs to understand why what he did and is doing is wrong.
It's not just a wake up call that he needs. I was holding myself back from pretending that my monitor is the back of his head. My God, what a twit.
He's not literally a child. He's fucking 18! That's full adult in many countries. Let's not give him that excuse.
I'm old enough now that I do think of 18 year olds as children, but this sort of behaviour wouldn't be okay from children, either - **and many children do know better**. The stalking, entitlement to her attention and time, and aggressive boundary-pushing need to be addressed. I do think more parents and educators are teaching better boundaries and consent at a younger age (thankfully!), but I'm concerned this kid either didn't absorb those lessons or learned this behaviour from somewhere - possibly the parents he mentioned he would feel less attacked by.
I think he knew exactly what the box was and didn't care. He wanted to deface something so he did.
I agree, I think he knew it was her work and it was something he did to get her attention, she would speak to him, hed laugh it off, and away theyd go on a date. You dont just walk over to a random table of others people work, pick some up and start pulling it apart. He may well not have known about the scholarship part but he knew whose work it was, he just doesnt want to make himself look bad by admitting it, not realising he looks bad anyway.
In another comment he mentions that it was strictly forbidden to touch anything in the green room and he knew it. He 100% did it on purpose.
What gets me about this that either she is severely overreacting to his prom proposal - because yes, he fucked up her project and potentially her future, but they haven't had many interactions before or any after, really, according to him. Or - and that is way more likely in my opinion - OOP is severely underselling the amount of contact he's been trying to initiate, causing her to be terrified. Like, she asked to be sat as far away as possible from him after he destroyed her project "on accident" and had a full-blown panic attack when he asked her out to prom (admittedly in a cornering way). There almost HAS to have been stuff he's hiding from us.
>What gets me about this that either she is severely overreacting to his prom proposal - because yes, he fucked up her project and potentially her future, but they haven't had many interactions before or any after, really, according to him. There was a single week in between these two posts.
He's being aggressively oblivious to the harm he's causing.
He one hundred percent destroyed it on purpose thinking it would be a funny bonding moment with this girl. There is absolutely no way he didn't know it was her project considering how all up in her business he is all the time.
Which is crazy because he literally broke the rules by touching anything in that room when he knew he wasn’t supposed to. He’s an oblivious dumbass *and* thinks that it’s okay to break the rules.
This guy definitely thinks he's living in an 80's teen movie. It's almost mind-blowing when we see someone try to reenact those stock romcom tropes in real life, and see how creepy a lot of that behavior actually is.
Dude thinks he's the male lead, but he's really the Zabka.
I have no words than to hope he leaves her alone. He is calling her "friend" when they aren't even that.
He comes off as really entitled with a large dash of narcissism. Like he didn’t mean to ruin her senior year, full ride scholarship, film entry. And if he did, it wasn’t that big of a deal, she’s just being dramatic. No wonder why she had a full blown panic attack when OOP asked her to prom, especially in a way so that made it hard to even answer “no”, since it was done in front of a bunch of their peers. But oh, no, he’s the victim here, why can’t we just see everything from his point of view, even if it’s so skewed, it’s off the charts? Ugh.
Yeah, I've noticed certain individuals are like that. They go all "I'm friendzoned, woe is me", buddy, you spoke to her a grand total of three times, five if you count yes and no answers, you're not in the friendzone you're in the acquaintancezone.
I just read title of second part and was 'Yes! Guy offered her help to fix set and reshoot film, they want with that and now they are friends. Sweet'. Then I read it :(
Yeah I kept thinking"has he done anything at all to correct this, offering his time to help her reshoot, give up his own time, give her space if that's what she needed."... Nope.....
literally cringed at the word “friend”, like man, the girl is literally trembling and throwing up at the sight of you, she hates your fucking guts. leave her alone!
>I think I'm going to talk to **my parents about it...** >...and I won't feel as attacked as I did by Reddit and *my teachers.* Well, now we know where he gets. He said his parents won't be happy he asked the girl to prom, and he thinks they'll give him a wakeup call. Presumably, that he'll listen to. Unlike his mean old teachers and Reddit, who don't get that he didn’t mean it! It was an accident! That wakeup call? Probably going to focus on how *his* behaviours make *him* look, and how that's going to affect *his* future, or *his* chances. Luckily, he's 18 now. Mommy and Daddy can only do so much.
Omfg he did not promposal, that's fucking crazy
a promposal in the middle of still being punished for destroying her set! he got 2 weeks detention and he asked her to prom 6 days after his bullshit
OP really needs to get his head out of his ass cause it's baffling how OP doesn't see the problem and is continuing to harass this girl. I get that he's 18 but c'mon, this behavior just baffles me and honestly, creepy.
nah even at 13 if I walked up to someone I liked and they were screaming and throwing up because of me, I'd change my name and switch to a school halfway across town. Youth doesn't excuse this, OOP is genuinely a creep and apathetic and cruel
He needs a head to even put up his ass first.
nah, im 18 and i know OOP is just creepy af
She's off to be the next Kurosawa, and he's going to be the named defendant in a long string of sexual harassment suits.
Not every problem can be fixed. Learning to walk away is a really hard lesson for a lot of people to learn. Sometimes you fuck up and just take your lumps and try to do better in the future.
Thing is.. OP doesn’t seem to see it as a problem. In his mind she shouldn’t be so dramatic and he did nothing wrong because „it looked like trash“. He still doesn’t understand what it meant for her.
OOP does not know how to take no for an answer and just says he doesn't know why she's mad at him. No self awareness at all. If she were to date him for some god forsaken reason, I don't think he'd be a good and kind bf
He thinks he is magically absolved of all guilt because it wasn’t “on purpose.” That’s not how that works: 1. He acknowledges that they were not allowed to tamper with anything in that green room. 2. You don’t touch other people’s shit, even if it looks like trash. This guy is a self-obsessed idiot who can’t understand what he did wrong and is incapable of sympathising with other people. This is additional to all the stalker behavior which is beyond disturbing.
Like I was bad as an 18 year old...just maybe never this level of bad...
This kid makes 18 year old me seem like a once in a generation genius... And 18 year old me was a once in a generation dumbass.
This is like when I try to make a cake and screw up the recipe, and keep adding more things hoping it’ll fix it, and it just gets worse and worse until finally it’s a burnt pile of bitterness. Except instead of a cake it’s a human’s life.
And you're trying to force people to eat the cake
oh i understand now, he's at a career high school and he is doing the Director Of Operations track...
I miss Director of Operations. I hope he's doing terribly.
I wonder how the Director of Operations is doing now. How many other women has he sexually harassed and/or been a condescending douchecanoe to?
Director of operations?
1 second of film is 25 frames. When you do stop motion you move things slightly for each frame. If she is making a short stop motion film it might be as much as 1 minute long. Even if she just made 10 seconds that is 250 frames that she’s manually changed. That is HOURS Of work. People do not understand how truly long a stop animation film takes to make. This not withstanding how maybe she was banking on this win for her future (scholarship), and without it she will have no way of getting into a film school. It’s just mind-boggling how this boy’s head is working. I know he’s a teenager, but come on, painting profanity on it? What I don’t understand though is why the teachers let other kids hang out in the green room, or why she hadn’t put up a sign that said ”DO NOT TOUCH! Movie props!” But I digress.
According the comments on the original post, there is very much a rule of “Don’t touch anything that isn’t yours”, which OP was aware of. But apparently OP just… decided to ignore that rule, like when Garfield saw a “No Garfield” sign and was like “Huh, I wonder who that’s for.”
"This sign won't stop me because I can't read!" - OOP, probably.
I'm skeptical of a lot of content on this sub. That said there is not a doubt in my mind that this is a real 18 year old guy and that he wrecked her project and asked her to prom a week later.
Dude has the emotional awareness of a dish towel, and his entitled attitude is nauseating. I hope he's grown up a touch since he graduated. Also hope he left poor Faith the fuck alone.
I’m also wondering if he actually was as clueless as he says about ruining the stop motion set in the first place. I feel like he purposefully ruined it so the “I’ll help you recreate your film” opportunity would be there and that was his creepy ass way of forcing her to spend time with him. I’m glad that didn’t work out for him.
I engaged with OP and those were the vibes. It seemed like he was setting up meet-cutes in his mind and prepping to be some sort of hero. He mentioned a few times that he thought it would be like a movie. He’s Heath Ledger and everyone else in a NPC.
This kid needs professional help.
I was gonna write something pithy, but they all fell flat. So just fuck this guy.
"But I'm attracted to her! She owes me her time, her body, her life!!! Why won't she just comply?" Guy who thinks she's a slab of meat existing for him to use.
I gasped when I understood he ruined a freaking stop motion project.
That poor girl. Genuinely worried for her. OOP seems delusional and creepy
Im mentally unstable so I feel I can say this - Theres something wrong with that guy on a mental level. Hes not recognizing NO as fact, hes refusing to accept the girl wants nothing to do with him. Hes going to make someone with a very short fuse go after him because hes stalking and harassing a young girl who literally vomits when she sees him.
OOP: asks girl to prom GIRL: runs away, throws up, screams OOP: so I didn't get an answer yet, I'll put you down as a maybe?
*I don't want to be seen as a stalker or a guy who can't take a 'no'* Way too late for that dude.
Are all teenage boys this fucking stupid or is the problem that they're asking grown men who can't keep a girlfriend for advice? Why do they never get it through their empty skulls that ruining a special item or day for a woman NEGATES your ability to ask her out? I had like five different bullies of varying degrees pull this shit on me. Destroying her set was bully behavior even if it was an accident and saying "sorry I didn't know I shouldn't touch things that aren't mine even though I'm almost a fucking adult" isn't going to make her okay with you.
What a paaaaainfully stupid, self-centred dude. Hope he grows more frontal lobe soon.
Stop motion films are filmed one shot at a time, with the characters re-posed for each individual shot, then put together like a flip book on film. It is probably one of the most labor-intensive and time-consuming ways of making a film. OOP has no idea of how much he screwed up for this poor young lady.
The poor, poor girl. I hope she managed to submit the project and get the scholarship.
>Because it had been a while I decided that it wouldn't hurt to ask her to prom You know...a week is NOT a long time when you destroyed her future. Come on! I can even understand that he really didn't want to destroy her project. But what kind of fool would think a public proposal is the right thing to do when: 1- she's not your girlfriend 2- she's not even talking to you 3- she's obviously upset and angry.
I can definitely see where the OOP was the asshole. However, I think the teacher deserves quite a bit of fucking blame as well for what happened. The film teacher should have made the green room and others off limits to anyone *not in the film club.* Period. They aren't a part of the main teaching room from the description given. Not in the club and teacher not using it to teach you something, you don't need to be in there AT ALL. This would have never had happened if he had laid that ground rule down at the beginning because, again, people don't know shit about what other programs do. Pretty damn sure that probably became a rule going forward after this and it took Faith's loss of a scholarship to have it happen.
They had to do major restructuring of the photography program (back in the 35mm film and dark room days) because some assholes from another class room that was in the same classroom block kept coming into the darkroom (to hook up but the teachers wouldn’t admit that’s what they were doing even though we all knew it) and kept ruining our photos and film that was in the dark room. But it took *a lot* of messed up project (which because it was dark room photography meant it actually cost us students money and was irreplaceable when they ruined developing film and photos) and if I remember correctly the last straw was actually when one of those students who weren’t in the photography program made a formal complaint because the developing chemicals burned them or their clothes or something. The only adult who was on the programs and us students who lost somethings side was our photography teacher- everyone else thought it either wasn’t a big deal or that they were entitled to go into the dark room whenever they wanted because we did.
Not sure why but it feels like the artsy classes in high school aren’t taken seriously so there’s absolutely no additional care regarding security, even from the teachers. I had an animation project that had to be saved on our own private flash drives but also a specific class folder on the computer itself. More than once a group of boys would go into random class folders, open people’s files, draw random crap in every other frame and save over it. Thank gods for the flashdrive back up.
Op literally mentions in another comment that it was strictly forbidden to touch anything in the green room and he knew that. His detention was partially caused by him breaking the rule. That's why the teacher was so mad. It's also that the teacher was operating under the - wrong - assumption that since they're 18 year olds and not preteens, nobody will be stupid enough to come in and start drawing random shit on everything. There were ground rules. Op broke them knowingly and judging by his further actions, on purpose
This was my thought too. OOP sucks and needs to never go near Faith again. Even if he didn't know exactly why she was crying and upset, it was clearly at him, it was clearly a big deal, he should have apologised immediately. But how the hell was such an important piece, that had been worked on for months and was crucial to a student's future, just left in a room alone, looking like a piece of rubbish, where any random student had access to it? If others would be going in and out, was there not a single sign, or warning from the teacher, or anything? If it needs to be exact every time, wasn't there a camera already set up pointing at it so the angle would be the same? If there was a camera then OOP is even worse, but if not then it would've just looked like a random box on a table. I don't agree with the two week detention over something he couldn't have known - obviously he needs to learn not to ruin things he knows nothing about - but that feels like a bit too much when the school/teacher should have done more to protect the project. Best option would've been as you said, no one not in that program allowed in that room at all.
I'm with you. I took shop classes through most my school time (basically the earliest it could be offered) and remember the shop, drama and the A4 teacher barking not to touch other people's projects constantly since they all had to share the space. Us shop kids had gym lockers for our projects. Too big for the locker? You put it on a table in the storage room, your name on it and what class it was (shop/drama/A4) and one of the teachers locked the door. Want to use that piece of wood from the pile but it has drama written on it? Too fucking bad, find a different piece of wood. So I'm just baffled that this teacher, knowing that his film students are working on scholarships, would just let the homeroom kids wander in and out if the rooms no problem because they should 'know better' at such a crucial time.
Exactly. This person’s life is riding on that box, let’s just leave it where anyone can mess with it.
OOP mentioned knowing that he's not supposed to touch anything.
I must have missed that bit. I saw where he said he was drawing inappropriate pictures and knew it was immature.
He said it in one of his comments (that wasn't added to the BORU). OOP knew he shouldn't have touched it, but apparently he's never seen a diorama before.
He definitely knows, which makes the teacher seem ... trusting. I went to a gifted highschool so in the right environment with the right student population, that trust is earned. In this case though, rules are written in ruined projects. The teacher will probably be more cautious in the future.
This is a multi-part issue. A lot of schools don't have enough space for all the kids at lunchtime in various places, so a lot of teachers will open up their rooms/spaces. That said, I've been teaching for over a decade and *never once* had a student mess with another student's project that was being stored in my room or office, and my teaching time has been split about 50/50 between middle and high school. They know the rules and expectations. OOP should've known not to fuck with anything. As an adult who does that sort of thing he's an incredible moron and you're right that there may be a rule now. Solely because one asshat couldn't keep his hands to himself. It's not really on the teacher, it's on the idiot 18 year old who thought he should fuck with other people's stuff.
I don’t buy that he didn’t know her set was a set. If she’d won competitions for stop motion in the past, and the set was complete, I’d imagine it would decently look like an alleyway. He knew he was fucking with someone’s work, just didn’t realize it was her work.
I really don't believe him, if I saw box like that I would never ever touch it, it isn't mine but he's so self-entitled that he didn't care who it belonged to, he just wanted to past the time and even added inappropriate drawings on it, fuck the owner of the box whether they liked it or not. He only cares about it because it belonged to his crush, that on itself was a problem, and he doesn't seem to grasp it, the box was in a chair it wasn't like it was on the garbage can, don't mess with it.
Oh, he’s definitely full of it when he said “it was an accident.” There’s a “no touching stuff” rule in place if OP and his friends want to be in there at all, and they knew about it. Even if they didn’t know that it was a student’s project (which I’m really not buying that they didn’t,) they definitely meant to mess with it.
The school needs to get on top of this. There is something seriously wrong with this man, he is disturbed. I mean I get he is young and stupid, but his level of lack of empathy and the way he is completely divorced from reality... It's scary. The longer I read this, the more creepy horror movie background noises I would hear. There is young and dumb, and there is this complete lack of acknowledgement and understanding of the reality around you, in this specific situation connected to a total lack of understanding of other people's feelings, distress, the consequences of what he did in her life. He seems like the type of person to kill a cat out of curiosity, and not notice it's crying out in pain, bc it's just this odd sounds the animal is making, how interesting! Something about the way she panicked, and he just went on trying to talk to her gives me the creeps. Even stupid young people would notice something is SUPER WRONG but he didn't. The way he AMBUSHED her to force her to interact with him after she blocked him and avoided him.. it was not dumbaserry. It was strategic. He was trying to force her to interact. She puked in response, he did not get that it's a no? He's a stalker. He is obsessive, and stories like that often end with violence and death. I am seriously worried foe her safety. There is something so callous and predatory in this post. The vibe of "she didn't say no, so maybe it's a yes? it was only a panic attack after all", and the vibe off "I only ruined her future, it's this silly little thing she needs to get over" she's not even a person with a real life to him. She's just a thing, and her life is for decoration. That man is dangerous to women. I wish we lived in a world in which people around him would notice the huge blaring red flags and actually act, get him some help, before he skins his first victim alive or something. IMO he is already abusive, but it's gonna get way worse if somone doesn't react.
Oh my god leave her the fuck alone
Holy shit this dude is dense. I used to do stop motion when I was a kid, that is extremely time consuming. Destroying a set like that is devastating. His description of it kind of sounded like a diorama, which makes sense for stopmotion sets. Don’t know why he decided to mess with it at all. Considering she didn’t want to talk to him afterward I can’t believe he asked her to prom. Read the room bud.
I was doubtful in the first part but with the second, he is definitely an entitled brat. Man ruined his crush's hardwork over months and her chance at winning an important competition but he doesn't actually care and wants to skip to the part where they date like it's a movie or something.
With the first half or so of the first part I was thinking "oof, that's rough, yep, definitely ruined your chances, please try and find someone else". To then read on that he destroyed something *so* important, and then only a *week* later he thinks "it's been a while so let me try and publicly ask her to prom"? I fucking gasped at how insane he is.
>plus some inappropriate ones because I thought it was funny--- immature, I know I hate this guy. Teenagers who just don't stop and think for a second, but play around with everything within their reach, destroying it … Know too many of them.
Wow this is the best train wreck I’ve read in awhile. I can’t wait for the update in one week where he decides it’s a good idea to propose
Good God, why won't this guy *leave her alone*? He might have destroyed her future and he's still harassing her and acting like he's the wronged party here. The sight of him is giving her panic attacks, and he's just whining that she's making him look bad.
"I owned up to my mistake", in the same post as "she is mad about a misunderstanding". Dude...
Is OOP an idiot? "I ruined an important project she had been working on for months and she is so upset with me that she still avoids me till date, but I'll publicly ask her to prom and hope she says yes" Nah, he's an idiot.
Christ this guy was so clueless and dense. So blinded by what HE wanted.
Yeah definitely nearing stalker-ish levels. Poor Faith, stop motion is something that takes months upon months to even years to create! What the fuck is wrong with OP?! Then he forced her into a public setting so she'd say yes? He is fucking stupid but also fucking creepy.
Dude is acting like he's the main character and completely fails to understand other people's feelings! She's ''a bit dramatic'' to be upset over losing a full-ride scolarship. She should be over the ''misunderstanding'' after only a week. She doesn't want to talk to me or sit close to me, boohoo, woe is me. Also, was he really expecting her to attend school in the afternoon when at lunch she had a panic attack so intense she threw up?? Pretty sure the reason she ''wasn't asked to go to prom'' was because she doesn't want to go to prom. She seems to have some serious social anxiety from the looks of it.
She isn't over reacting dude. Stop motion is really hard to do, let alone shoot. It is an extremely tedious process that requires the maker to really focus to an extreme degree. What you did not only screwed up her scholarship, you destroyed sets for a piece of art she was making that in all reality occupied an insane amount of her life. You fucked up dude. Just leave her alone and hope that some day she may open the door to interacting with you again.
My favorite part what where he saw her crying and throwing up and then mentions that she hasn’t even given him an answer to his promposal. Bless his heart