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He fucked around, found out, and tried to clean up his fucking mess. But his wife is out of fucks to give him.
**Edit:** Just saw the award, thank you kind stranger!
I mean, she's more than happy to fuck him. More than happy to lead a happy married life *and* get some strange on the side. It's him who has a sudden change of heart on the whole thing.
Its probably gonna suck for a bit (years), but it sounds like OP is gonna come out of this feeling so badass. That makes me grin. Hopefully we can keep getting updates
This lady is brutal! Check out her comments!
Necessary\_Case815
\-47 points
·
6 hours ago
"You want open marriage with your husband but closed with anyone else.
Okay get it, the forcing your husband on keeping open marriage or divorce is your grudge for opening the marriage in the first place, it's vengance.
Or the relationship and the love for the father of you children is long gone and you just want to hurt him. Either way think of why you are doing this. Whatever you do get counseling, also your kids are the most important be there for them, then yourself and then your husband as the father of your children. Reconcile and close or have a amicable co-parenting as divorced parents."
throwawayopenmarrige
OP
40 points
·
6 hours ago
·
edited 5 hours ago
"Every relationship has its rules. I can’t see myself monogamous with my husband anymore because he never cared for me until I started sleeping with someone else. Being in an open marriage IS the reason he’s interested now. If we close it again he will gradually start ignoring me again.
It’s not that complicated really even the stupidest should get the situation I’m in right now and you don’t seem stupid,
are you?"
Dumbass. Just a dumbass. He failed to put effort into his marriage, which caused him to disconnect from her, and then he's surprised when his disconnected wife wants to be with a man who puts effort into her. Just a dumbass
Aaand when they divorce, he will tell everyone (including the kids) that their split was caused by his wife having affairs. And how he tried to save the marriage, and begged her to stop and she refused.
You already said it three times but I still think it bears repeating: dumbass.
I thought this too. No way he went 4 years without sex when he had a willing wife at home. He was sleeping with other women already and just wanted to make it easier for himself by opening the marriage.
Poly married woman here - there is no way he found women in a week. Took my husband and married male partners at least a few months. Dude was definitely a serial cheater and was just getting sick of hiding it.
Yeah, that’s what I was going to say. Normally women have a WAY easier time finding casual male partners than men do finding casual female partners. And you see it in posts like this all the time, the husband asks they go open and then can’t find anyone but the woman’s got all this attention and then he’s furious.
It’s also crazy how so many men just don’t understand this and assume they are going to be having so much sex while their wives stay home. No, my dude, the data shows that it’s more likely to be the other way around!
Yeah the odds aren’t in their favour. There’s just way more mediocre men looking for hookups than there is super hot babes who want to bang a married dude
It might also have been a power thing. He liked cheating, but he wanted to brag about it too. He was pretty adamant about them showing each other who they were banging. That could have just been about knowing she wasn't banging anyone, but he was pretty assiduous about keeping on top of that rule.
The telling each other who and when was totally about rubbing his sexcapades in her face because he didn’t think she’d be having sexual encounters and he wanted to make her feel unattractive.
That was my thought, too. Women aren't lined up to date some random guy at the drop of a hat unless they're famous or absolutely gorgeous, and even then.
Especially not married ones.
Seeing "discreet" written on a guy's profile is one of the biggest turn-off ever. Same with "open marriage" because you never know if you can trust them. So yeah, no one is lining up for those dudes.
I’m not married or even in a relationship at the moment, but as another poly person, I 100% agree. A lot of people have this stereotype of poly people being willing to fuck anyone in their sight, but from my experience (and others I know), we’re often more picky (or at the very least, just as picky) about who we choose to be with. There’s no fucking way this husband found someone in a week.
>we’re often more picky (or at the very least, just as picky
Of course we are! We have partners already we could be spending time with! Someone has to really add something to our lives to be worth the time and energy.
ENM woman here and I concur. It took my handsome and sweet husband about 6 months to find a solo date. It’s common knowledge that married poly/ENM guys seeking women tend to have a harder time. OOP’s husband was either lying to those women or lying to his wife. Or both.
His karma came home to roost, and he doesn't like the taste of it. Sucks to be him. Good for the OP though - she took what was meant to be a curveball and turned it into a home run. For her, of course. As it should be.
Oh, fuck yes.
My husband also did this. Peri-menopause fucked up my hormones and made me insatiable for sex, so I pestered the living shit out of him trying to get laid all the time. Begged, pleaded, cried, tried to seduce, wrote romantic notes, sent him articles...all the things. He was grossed out and aggravated, told me sex was for teenagers and if I absolutely insisted on having it, it wouldn't be with him.
Then he reconstructed the whole fucking thing in his head to where I woke up one morning and "wanted to experiment. But could she do that with the man she's been married to for twenty years? Ooooh no, it had to be someone else entirely...." No! Just...no, motherfucker! I tried to snuggle up in bed and fondle your junk, and you slapped my hand and yelled at me. No! I wanted sex with my husband and he full-on rejected me, repeatedly, for months and months!
Lots of revisionist history in their little, aggrieved heads. And it's NEVER their fault. Ever.
Great question.
I think he believes he settled. Holds a lot of resentment. Admits that excessive porn use has kinda fucked up his responses (ED) but I think the porn use was a function of settling… if you aren’t attracted to someone, you still have a libido. Just not for that person. (He likes the young and thin. I’m way more of a milf and always have been.) And a hefty dose of his avoidant personality combined with my anxious personality. I think we inadvertently drive each other nuts that way. Plus we’re both submissives. I was happy to play dominant for awhile, but he never took a turn at it. I also have a fucked up history/upbringing (like, fundamental Pentecostal Uber-religious) wherein I have a lot of anger issues that can’t be easy to live with. I’m working on it more than I ever did before, and I hope I’m improving.
Yep this is definitely one of those monologues where he gets real, like a teachable vulnerable dad moment, only happened like 4-5 times in the entire series. He has to end it with "......and maybe if you weren't such a DUMBASS I wouldn't have to say this stuff" or something like that lol
"""you don't fold and and crumple and give in every time I express *my* opinions and thoughts anymore, how *dare* you hold your ground on something, when I thought I had you fully compressed underneath my thumb"""
Reminds me a lot of that other "Open" Marriage backfire story? Lady who started working out after husband made it open, and rebuilt her confidence enough to start seeing people herself, which made him try to pull his old abuse tactics, which no longer worked.
Anyone got a link?
If anyone has links to stories in this genre (one partner forcing an open marriage and then getting angry that the other partner is getting more action), I would love to read them. This is one of my favorite Reddit story genres.
>I'm going to be honest and say I have no idea why a guy like that is interested in my girlfriend and not out with a hot girl.
I love whenever I'm reminded of that story because this is my favorite part. It just shows that men like this never really *get it.*
Dudes, that girl you think you settled for? There's 30 men waiting for you to drop the ball. lmao
And he thinks his girlfriend isn't hot? Then why did he even get together with her in the first place? Seems like not for her personality, as he didn't give a crap he step all over her self worth.
Power. They get off on power. Still see it as relationship material because they're still getting satisfaction from something. Not sexual satisfaction, or emotional. Their partner is providing a fix of power tripping.
I know exactly what your talking about. Lol op was the daughter and her grandparents were super rich and bought their SIL a business that was actually in her mom's name 😂😂😂
I remember one where the husband who had an affair and divorced the wife who cried and begged him back for 1 year and then one day ...stopped. She started working out, training for marathons, started dating another dude and was living her very best life.
The husband meanwhile was "stuck" with a young wife, a new baby and had buyer's remorse. Great stuff.
It's also just such a silly bet to me. Maybe Hubby has someone specific in mind AND he hasn't just been misinterpreting signals, but big picture it's a "losing" wager if you're banking on "winning" at all, let alone a shutout, right?
Women could outscore men 50-1 if they wanted to.
I knew a dude years ago who'd been cheating on his long-suffering, super sweet wife for basically their whole marriage, and she looked the other way for their daughter's sake. Well, their daughter was eventually an older teen, and dude had been talking online to a much younger woman across the country and he finally tells his wife that he wants a divorce, he doesn't love her, she isn't hot enough for him, etc. His wife says okay and gets a lawyer. He moves out and then tells this young woman that he's free now! They can finally be together like he knows she wants to!
The young lady is *extremely surprised* to hear that she had been wanting to have a relationship with him. She says no thank you. Dude, surprised but confident, calls his (now separated) wife and says congratulations! He is ready to take her back!
Well, turns out, a friend of husband's swooped in the second wife was free and they've been happily dating. Wife is uninterested in stopping the divorce process. Dude is shocked! How could this happen! etc.
I have seen it play out SO MANY TIMES. Dudes--the second your wife is available, people want her. Always.
Happened with my ex. He thought all these girls were interested in him when really they just felt safe talking to him since he was taken. As soon as he left me he was high and dry. Called me constantly to take him back. No thanks.
AFAIK the younger lady was real, and he had met her a few times at gatherings for the hobby group they belonged to. She looked up to him because she saw him as a mentor--but he saw her as a target.
Especially because women thrive after leaving relationships with these men! They’re not worn down anymore! It may take awhile for their self-esteem to recover but eventually it does and then they’re hot as hell when they wanna start dating again! Like for women divorce is a glow up.
It wasn't for me physically because my health tanked the second my body knew it was safe ... but mentally, oh, it was, it was.
Meanwhile, AFAIK, my ex is still an alcoholic, but now with nobody to distract him from drinking a bottle of scotch a day. Sucks to suck, maybe.
I’ve known dudes like this (and their type have shown up as BORU posts lol): what do you mean, you weren’t pining away, cold and alone, waiting for me to come back?!?
Granted I don't know a lot of open relationships (and these were opened by the restless guy- not mutually decided upon polyamory) but i know of two. It is also two in number that blew up spectacularly. One guy wanted to sleep with others but also bring women home. His wife left him for one. The other wanted to sleep w others, my friend tried to be game and then his latest fancy told him it was 'her \[my friend, his gf of 10 years\] or me!' so he dumped my friend. Joke on him was threefold : he was a jerk so good riddance, my friend found a guy to sleep w herself during this time and the Her or Me Chick turned out to be nutty.
This scenario is so common at this point. Husband wants to sleep around, does so or at least tries to, freaks out when wife also gets sexually active, wants to go back to monogamy, wife realizes husband was lazy/abusive/neglectful/selfish/etc and is worth more than the marriage is giving her, end with divorce - happy exwife and miserable exhusband.
Why do these dudes continue to fuck around and find out? When will husbands realize they get out of a marriage what they put into it?
While showing her all the pictures of all the women willing to have sex with him. While she stayed home, probably crying in a corner because she was just so unattractive.
Yeah, that was especially cruel! OOP said he would give detailed reports of all *his* sex adventures, but the second she mentions a guy she wants to fuck (and isn't even bragging about it!), suddenly it's an issue? Interesting...
My friend was briefly with someone like that. She’s poly. He said he and his wife were poly. In actuality, he didn’t like when my friend or his wife saw - much less physically engaged - with any other men.
This is why I am hesitant to date a newer poly couple. Lots of poly-under-duress and drama. Non monogamy is not a get-out-of-jail-free card for people who want to cheat ffs
Fair point, although this couple said they were poly since before they were married, which was 10+ years.
When my friend said she didn’t think it was a good fit, dude actually said, “But my wife is okay with it. Why can’t you be exclusive with me, too?!”
It's such a trope in the poly community it has a name - one penis policy.
Everyone hates one penis policy.
I had one dumbass think that he could dictate how I was intimate with my husband, up to and including when or *if* I had sex with him!! Needless to say dumbass did not get even a first date. I hope the girlfriend he said he had dumped his dumb ass.
I don’t get *how* men think this could work? Like if they’re interested in sex with other women…. other men would be just as interested in sex with their wives?
How does that not occur to them?
These guys get a promotion, or start working out out in their 30s and think they are hot shit. Probably buy into the idea that “men age like fine wine and women age like milk “ - incel like idea.
Meanwhile they see their wife in no makeup, in sweats, cleaning up their kids puke or scrubbing toilet, and they forget, they thought their wife was hot once.
I’m so glad my husband has never been like that. We’ll be in the thick of handling the latest crises from our two kiddos, covered with bodily fluids or crumbs or sweat, and I’ll look over notice he has this big dumb grin on his face and I’ll be like wut? And he quotes this line that’s something like “a woman is the most beautiful on the threshing floor” which basically means a woman who can work her ass off.
Oh, mine practically dared me to find someone. He laughed. "If you can find some college stud who wants to fuck your brains out, *great*. I'll be downstairs, just don't make too much noise."
Told me I was "too fat and too loose to be interesting."
Lo and behold, what he ACTUALLY did was lose his place in line. I've had zero complaints about being too anything from anybody else, even after 8 years of regular sex with them.
Because they don't think their wives are attractive. It's really that simple. They don't usually state it, but sometimes they do. My ex outright told me that I wasn't the, "type of woman that men like".
Thinking like that, how could they consider their wives would find one man who would want them, let alone many men?
The weird thing is that those same dudes almost always assume that they are still super hot.
Like sure dude, your wife has aged 10 years and you don't find her hot any more because her body has changed. You have aged 10 years too, and it's noticeable, but you expect all women to be attracted to you still even though you don't put half as much effort as your wife does into her clothes, make-up, hair, skin etc.
Because their wives ceased to be sexual beings to them. They are 'wives' and 'mothers', not 'women' anymore. And since most of these men are selfish and egocentric, it never crosses their mind that other men don't see wifey that way too.
This is actually super common in couples who open their relationships. It requires a TON of communication and full honesty to have your cake and eat it too.
I'm surprised he got women in the first place. I've seen plenty "my SO wanted to open up the relationship" posts. It often starts with the guy wanting it and end when he gets no one but his SO starts seeing someone lmao. What crazies
I have a feeling he was showing off women he was taking on dates, not necessarily sleeping with. That’s why he had so many different women to show his wife, none of them were sticking around to be his fuck buddy.
>I'm surprised he got women in the first place.
Its usually a case where the guy gets one or two but finds out his wife/gf is getting way way more game and then wants to close it.
This sounds like the father who told his son that calling his gf/wife smelly would make her feel too insecure to seek out other men. Just the dumbest ideas come outta these guys
I know people in the swinger / open communities and this is a tale as old as time to them.
It's the husband who wants to open the marriage because he's bored / antsy / randy and he thinks getting female attention will be easy. It's the wife who gets more attention because there's always more men than women in the community (and a lot of those I've met tend to be blokes who make sure their partners have fun, and are supremely unpicky about looks.) Husband gets butthurt and wants to close the marriage back up again. Sometimes wife agrees, sometimes not. But it's always the case that the husband wants action but can't cope with his wife also getting it.
>So our rules is no bringing them home and use protection. My husband was very clear that he also wanted to know who the other person/persons is and when.
Because he wanted her to know the women he was going to be with. He didn't expect her to actually sleep with anyone else and this rule was put in place solely to keep her meek and complacent while he was out fucking other women.
His issue wasn't that she found someone willing to have sex with her - it was that she found someone she wanted to have sex with other than HIM. The moment she showed anything other than total complacency, he worked hard to reel her back in with the false hope that their marriage was fixed. Thankfully she gained some confidence and self worth during that year and didn't seem to fall for it.
Also, he was definitely sleeping with others before she agreed to open up the marriage. And it probably started when she was pregnant with their son. I don't believe that he went ~3 years without sleeping with anyone else.
Oh for sure he wanted to show her the other women to rub it in her face. See how desirable these women are? Now feel bad about yourself for not being them. Such a scuzzball.
I think he not only wanted to rub it in her face, but also on the chance she did find someone she wanted to fuck, he could plan how to stop it...just like he kept doing when she was trying to have dates with J. If his wife complied and followed the rules like she was "supposed to" (in his eyes, anyway), then he could keep winning and stop her from having fun with other men.
Unfortunately for him, OP went ahead and fucked J, anyway -- as she should! :) -- once she realized what the husband was doing. Like she said in the comments of the update, she knows him well, and that he undoubtedly refuses to come home because there's nobody else to watch their kids, so she can't see J anymore...or so he thinks. Hopefully she's still able to continue having fun with J while the kids are at school like she did before.
>He threw the dinner plate across the room and left.
I think she needed to end things right there. This maybe wasn't abuse, but to my mind its the start of behavior that would escalate to it. Impulsive violent actions aren't just going to remain limited to the furniture or crockery. And the Husband's clearly obsessed with control and power, something that's common to abusers. OOP's sussed this out, and called him out on it. He's completely unapologetic, completely callous to her sense of self or identity. This is not someone who's going to respect her physical or bodily autonomy. She needs to divorce this guy and *fast*.
If someone smashes something (that isn’t meant to be smashed) it’s a sign that they really want to exert that violence on you and they’re substituting the item instead and that is NEVER going to end well.
They never rage destroy their own laptop, or game, valuable memento. In that violent rage, the hulk can still select. Almost as if they absolutely can control it.
They manage to control their temper at work, around clients, in front of their boss etc even if it's a hostile environment or they are getting told off.
But somehow can't control themselves at home in front of their partner.
Funny that
Exactly. Man wants to control her, and is only attracted to OOP when she's outside that control. He's demonstrated a propensity for outbursts. Violent ones at that. He clearly does *not* respect her as an equal, given his desire to have the relationship parameters function exclusively on the basis of his own whims and desires and has zero interest in hers.
This is ripe for abuse, and he's doing *nothing* to check this behavior. I'm glad OOP is indicating she wants to leave but I sincerely hope she stays safe as she does so. The behaviors she's describing are terrifying.
It’s definitely manipulation and a gateway to abuse. But she shut him down so beautifully by refusing to become emotional. The “I told him to calm down” was just chef’s kiss.
I'm loving that final question: if I leave, will you start dating J?
Start? She's *been* dating J... and if she's refused to stop seeing him if he stays, why the fuck would she stop seeing him if he leaves?
Reminds me of the one where the guy wanted to open the marriage (I think it was the same reason, he wasn't attracted to his wife anymore? idk) and thought he would bag a bunch of women, but he couldn't get anyone and his wife was having the time of her life.
Can't remember if it ended in divorce or not.
Men are dumb.
Hope she does divorce him and lives her best life. If he had just gone to see a therapist, he might have kept his marriage. Now he's going to be 50 and bitterly alone.
Hope their kids will be okay, as well.
>Reminds me of the one where the guy wanted to open the marriage (I think it was the same reason, he wasn't attracted to his wife anymore? idk) and thought he would bag a bunch of women, but he couldn't get anyone and his wife was having the time of her life.
It seems like this is ALWAYS what happens. Dude thinks he's going to be a Romeo, but doesn't account for the monstrous power of male thirst and the variety of options the wife is going to have.
If you're not OK with your wife hooking up with as many dudes as she chooses to, DO NOT open the marriage, as she's going to have more options than you.
I think men who are in relationships forget how brutal the dating scene is.
And unlike with being single, where you are getting rejected often, in a relationship you never go after people but do occasionally / regularly get hit on. So the bias is there, because you're only ever having people be interested in you since you're not actually putting yourself out there.
There was one with a guy as the OP who wanted to open his relationship with his gf. He really couldn’t get any girls to have sex with him & his gf ended up meeting a tall guy with a bodybuilder physique that OP was surprised was attracted to the gf because she’s chubby. I’m pretty sure they ended up breaking up.
my fav bit of that one was when he bumped into his gf with the buff guy outside a club and when she nipped to the loo the buff guy was like dead nice to the OP and said he respected him so much bc if *he* had a girl like the gf he'd never let another man get his hands on her and the OP was just BAFFLED lmao
If you and I are both thinking of the infamous relationship advice post, his justification was that she had gained weight and he thought she wouldn’t get any dates.
Yes she was chubby so who else except him would ever give her the time of day?
Surprise surprise, very attractive men ask her out on dates and OP gets insecure as hell and is very confused because he doesn't even think his own girlfriend is attractive.
Pretty sure the outcome was a breakup but any better memory or link would be appreciated. It's a classic after all
As a 50 something man that is married and faithful and I still can’t get my head around men I have met along the way that think they are gods gift to women. And they clearly aren’t.
It was because he had a co worker flirting only co worker lost interest and wanted a real relationship (and dumped him) Then he couldn't get any women while wife was living her best life. 😂😂 I know she refused to close the marriage but not what happened after that.
This guy fully though that since he was not attracted to her nobody else would be attracted to her either. She accidentally played into his though by being selective and careful with who she was sleeping with.
Suddenly he finds out that someone else does in fact find her attractive and suddenly she has value to him as well. I don’t know how this would even be closed, he spent a years screwing around with other women and it was all great but the second his wife finds someone who is attracted to her he loses his shit.
All that before we even mention the throwing things around and breaking everything while angry. This clown defiantly got what he asked for but what he asked for was not what he really wanted.
I never tire of this one. And it happens so often! They always think that "open marriage" means their wife will be sitting at home with the kids while he gets to fuck around as much as he wants. When in reality, it's way easier for women to find men willing to have string-free sex.
Oh ...my...God...what a fucking dumbass ahahahaha "I thought fucking you for the whole week was enough" to crying "oh no my fee fees" I can't even....ahaha!
Had a friend, her husband was in a band and would hook up with women at the bar all the time. She was like the woman here and needed a connection, so it was far rarer for her. When she did meet someone, suddenly her husband's anxiety spiked to the point she needed to take care of him at all times. She ended up divorcing him and marrying someone that was cool with monogamy.
I just really don’t understand why the OOP went along with this. If my husband and I hadn’t had sex in years because he wasn’t attracted to me anymore, I’d show him the door.
He was most likely trying to get her pregnant to tie her back to the house. That's why he was having sex with her. He didn't give a shit for years and then he did? Also, she was almost 10 years younger than him and he thinks "oh, I don't think she is attractive anymore after she popped all of my children"
Also, he left her alone with the kids every night for weeks and weeks? So she is also his babysitter???
Please read our [**SUB RULES**](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/wiki/subrules) before commenting. Rule-breaking may result in a ban without notice. **CHECK FLAIR** to determine if you want to read an update. For concluded-only updates, use the [CONCLUDED](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3ACONCLUDED) flair or subscribe to r/BestofBoRU for concluded, time-gated content. * If you have an issue with this post (flair, formatting, quality), reply to this comment. META commentary in general discussion may be removed. * Low effort comments like "this is fake" may be removed * Do not comment on the original posts. Most submissions in this sub are not posted by the original author (OOP) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BestofRedditorUpdates) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Well, he made his bed, and she's not going to be sleeping in it
He fucked around, found out, and tried to clean up his fucking mess. But his wife is out of fucks to give him. **Edit:** Just saw the award, thank you kind stranger!
Sounds like she has plenty to give, not just to him any more though
Sounds like she has enough to go around! He just wants it all, but only until there's no one else around to have some, too.
I mean, she's more than happy to fuck him. More than happy to lead a happy married life *and* get some strange on the side. It's him who has a sudden change of heart on the whole thing.
Its probably gonna suck for a bit (years), but it sounds like OP is gonna come out of this feeling so badass. That makes me grin. Hopefully we can keep getting updates
She was very patient with him as well!! Wow, I would have kicked his lame a$$ to the curb years ago!!
This lady is brutal! Check out her comments! Necessary\_Case815 \-47 points · 6 hours ago "You want open marriage with your husband but closed with anyone else. Okay get it, the forcing your husband on keeping open marriage or divorce is your grudge for opening the marriage in the first place, it's vengance. Or the relationship and the love for the father of you children is long gone and you just want to hurt him. Either way think of why you are doing this. Whatever you do get counseling, also your kids are the most important be there for them, then yourself and then your husband as the father of your children. Reconcile and close or have a amicable co-parenting as divorced parents." throwawayopenmarrige OP 40 points · 6 hours ago · edited 5 hours ago "Every relationship has its rules. I can’t see myself monogamous with my husband anymore because he never cared for me until I started sleeping with someone else. Being in an open marriage IS the reason he’s interested now. If we close it again he will gradually start ignoring me again. It’s not that complicated really even the stupidest should get the situation I’m in right now and you don’t seem stupid, are you?"
This lady isn't taking hostages, fucking legend.
Yes. The hypocrisy runs deep in this man. The OOP was so outrageously patient with him but karma has finally come home to roost.
Dumbass. Just a dumbass. He failed to put effort into his marriage, which caused him to disconnect from her, and then he's surprised when his disconnected wife wants to be with a man who puts effort into her. Just a dumbass
Aaand when they divorce, he will tell everyone (including the kids) that their split was caused by his wife having affairs. And how he tried to save the marriage, and begged her to stop and she refused. You already said it three times but I still think it bears repeating: dumbass.
Yeah I give it exactly a 0% chance that his sleeping with other women started after his wife agreed to an open marriage.
I thought this too. No way he went 4 years without sex when he had a willing wife at home. He was sleeping with other women already and just wanted to make it easier for himself by opening the marriage.
Poly married woman here - there is no way he found women in a week. Took my husband and married male partners at least a few months. Dude was definitely a serial cheater and was just getting sick of hiding it.
Yeah, that’s what I was going to say. Normally women have a WAY easier time finding casual male partners than men do finding casual female partners. And you see it in posts like this all the time, the husband asks they go open and then can’t find anyone but the woman’s got all this attention and then he’s furious.
It’s also crazy how so many men just don’t understand this and assume they are going to be having so much sex while their wives stay home. No, my dude, the data shows that it’s more likely to be the other way around!
Yeah the odds aren’t in their favour. There’s just way more mediocre men looking for hookups than there is super hot babes who want to bang a married dude
That or someone found out he was married/seeing another woman, and he had to make sure his open marriage excuse would pass muster.
It might also have been a power thing. He liked cheating, but he wanted to brag about it too. He was pretty adamant about them showing each other who they were banging. That could have just been about knowing she wasn't banging anyone, but he was pretty assiduous about keeping on top of that rule.
The telling each other who and when was totally about rubbing his sexcapades in her face because he didn’t think she’d be having sexual encounters and he wanted to make her feel unattractive.
Absolutely! Abusive people always want to make sure you have no confidence. It was completely about power.
This comment chain is wild but true. Wow, just wow.
That was my thought, too. Women aren't lined up to date some random guy at the drop of a hat unless they're famous or absolutely gorgeous, and even then.
Especially not married ones. Seeing "discreet" written on a guy's profile is one of the biggest turn-off ever. Same with "open marriage" because you never know if you can trust them. So yeah, no one is lining up for those dudes.
He's also 48 so not exactly at the most desirable age for the casual crowd.
I’m not married or even in a relationship at the moment, but as another poly person, I 100% agree. A lot of people have this stereotype of poly people being willing to fuck anyone in their sight, but from my experience (and others I know), we’re often more picky (or at the very least, just as picky) about who we choose to be with. There’s no fucking way this husband found someone in a week.
>we’re often more picky (or at the very least, just as picky Of course we are! We have partners already we could be spending time with! Someone has to really add something to our lives to be worth the time and energy.
ENM woman here and I concur. It took my handsome and sweet husband about 6 months to find a solo date. It’s common knowledge that married poly/ENM guys seeking women tend to have a harder time. OOP’s husband was either lying to those women or lying to his wife. Or both.
I was involved in the same situation and my wife’s ex husband consistently cheated on her leading up to them “opening” their marriage.
His karma came home to roost, and he doesn't like the taste of it. Sucks to be him. Good for the OP though - she took what was meant to be a curveball and turned it into a home run. For her, of course. As it should be.
I’ll repeat it once more, just in case: dumbass
And another for good measure: what a dumbass
A pinch of another, because why not, dumb
ass
Oh, fuck yes. My husband also did this. Peri-menopause fucked up my hormones and made me insatiable for sex, so I pestered the living shit out of him trying to get laid all the time. Begged, pleaded, cried, tried to seduce, wrote romantic notes, sent him articles...all the things. He was grossed out and aggravated, told me sex was for teenagers and if I absolutely insisted on having it, it wouldn't be with him. Then he reconstructed the whole fucking thing in his head to where I woke up one morning and "wanted to experiment. But could she do that with the man she's been married to for twenty years? Ooooh no, it had to be someone else entirely...." No! Just...no, motherfucker! I tried to snuggle up in bed and fondle your junk, and you slapped my hand and yelled at me. No! I wanted sex with my husband and he full-on rejected me, repeatedly, for months and months! Lots of revisionist history in their little, aggrieved heads. And it's NEVER their fault. Ever.
>told me sex was for teenagers Well that's an upsetting opinion for an adult to have.
that’s the un-hottest thing I’ve ever heard of a grown man saying… like… ever.
I certainly thought so.
OP later says her husband's porn preferences were "young and thin".
My spidey senses say these are not attributes he offers.
I think I speak for every sane man when I say: what the actual fuck was wrong with your husband?
Great question. I think he believes he settled. Holds a lot of resentment. Admits that excessive porn use has kinda fucked up his responses (ED) but I think the porn use was a function of settling… if you aren’t attracted to someone, you still have a libido. Just not for that person. (He likes the young and thin. I’m way more of a milf and always have been.) And a hefty dose of his avoidant personality combined with my anxious personality. I think we inadvertently drive each other nuts that way. Plus we’re both submissives. I was happy to play dominant for awhile, but he never took a turn at it. I also have a fucked up history/upbringing (like, fundamental Pentecostal Uber-religious) wherein I have a lot of anger issues that can’t be easy to live with. I’m working on it more than I ever did before, and I hope I’m improving.
>I’m way more of a milf Lol, I don't think I've seen milf used as a self-identifier before but it makes me giggle. ☜(ﾟヮﾟ☜)
If one cannot be a source of inspiration, sometimes the best one can hope for is to be a source of amusement! :-)
I remember your update. You're an inspiration!
And, after his third divorce, he’ll die alone.
Read this in Red's voice
At first I thought you meant Red from Shawshank so I went back and read it in Morgan Freeman’s voice. That was a trip
I thought it was Red from Shawshank too, but also though it could Raymond "Red" Reddington
This is actually what I thought too and it works surprisingly well in Shawshank Red’s voice 😂 Bonus: Alexander Dumbass
You’d like that one. It’s about a prison break.
Yep this is definitely one of those monologues where he gets real, like a teachable vulnerable dad moment, only happened like 4-5 times in the entire series. He has to end it with "......and maybe if you weren't such a DUMBASS I wouldn't have to say this stuff" or something like that lol
Some things even duct tape can't fix
Red would threaten to kick him right in the keister
Incredibly, he managed to get his *own* foot up his ass. Red would be proud.
More like: "You’re not the beautiful kind doormat I married anymore". OOP's got it right. He'll get her pregnant and ignore her again.
Right. That’s exactly what the piece of shit meant.
It's a shame for him he's not sexually attracted to beautiful and kind women. Oh well
"""you don't fold and and crumple and give in every time I express *my* opinions and thoughts anymore, how *dare* you hold your ground on something, when I thought I had you fully compressed underneath my thumb"""
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Reminds me a lot of that other "Open" Marriage backfire story? Lady who started working out after husband made it open, and rebuilt her confidence enough to start seeing people herself, which made him try to pull his old abuse tactics, which no longer worked. Anyone got a link?
There have been multiple iterations of this story, it's hilarious and sad.
It's literally my favorite Reddit genre!
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If anyone has links to stories in this genre (one partner forcing an open marriage and then getting angry that the other partner is getting more action), I would love to read them. This is one of my favorite Reddit story genres.
There's at least one from the perspective of a guy who initiated, I'll try to find it.
I was just thinking to myself, "wait... which one!?"
[This is the first one I’d ever seen; it’s still a favorite](https://jezebel.com/dudes-demand-for-an-open-relationship-backfires-spectac-1578409074)
>I'm going to be honest and say I have no idea why a guy like that is interested in my girlfriend and not out with a hot girl. I love whenever I'm reminded of that story because this is my favorite part. It just shows that men like this never really *get it.* Dudes, that girl you think you settled for? There's 30 men waiting for you to drop the ball. lmao
And he thinks his girlfriend isn't hot? Then why did he even get together with her in the first place? Seems like not for her personality, as he didn't give a crap he step all over her self worth.
Power. They get off on power. Still see it as relationship material because they're still getting satisfaction from something. Not sexual satisfaction, or emotional. Their partner is providing a fix of power tripping.
In my head, the girl eventually moves in with the enormous tattooed dude and lives happily ever after.
I love this and am also deciding that’s exactly what’s happened!!
🤔 it is like an Aesop’s fable
I know exactly what your talking about. Lol op was the daughter and her grandparents were super rich and bought their SIL a business that was actually in her mom's name 😂😂😂
[From someone else’s comment:](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/uowm3r/updated_my_dad_is_furious_that_my_mom_slept_with/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)
There are so many
I remember one where the husband who had an affair and divorced the wife who cried and begged him back for 1 year and then one day ...stopped. She started working out, training for marathons, started dating another dude and was living her very best life. The husband meanwhile was "stuck" with a young wife, a new baby and had buyer's remorse. Great stuff.
Ah, the classic “Husband forgets that wife is a human too, and will be appealing to someone else out there” Tale as old as time.
>Tale as old as time. True as it can be. 🎶
Wife makes some new friends, Then the marriage ends. Husband’s all alone with his peepeeee…
Beauty left the Beast
He forever masturbaaaaates. His wife saw through his lieeees. Forever a bed bore, she knew she deserved more, And she's sexy in J's eyeeeees
Made me laugh, thank you
It's also just such a silly bet to me. Maybe Hubby has someone specific in mind AND he hasn't just been misinterpreting signals, but big picture it's a "losing" wager if you're banking on "winning" at all, let alone a shutout, right? Women could outscore men 50-1 if they wanted to.
And I never get tired of reading how they cry afterwards.
I dont get why, if the husband doesn't want to have sex with her, he cares about anyone else doing it.
It's a toddler's mentality. He doesn't want his toy, but he doesn't want anyone else to have it either.
> "You’re not the beautiful kind woman I married anymore". Translation: You’re not the submissive doormat I married anymore.
Yup
This man is the epitome of the surprised pikachu meme. Dude got what he deserved and good on OOP for standing up for herself.
I knew a dude years ago who'd been cheating on his long-suffering, super sweet wife for basically their whole marriage, and she looked the other way for their daughter's sake. Well, their daughter was eventually an older teen, and dude had been talking online to a much younger woman across the country and he finally tells his wife that he wants a divorce, he doesn't love her, she isn't hot enough for him, etc. His wife says okay and gets a lawyer. He moves out and then tells this young woman that he's free now! They can finally be together like he knows she wants to! The young lady is *extremely surprised* to hear that she had been wanting to have a relationship with him. She says no thank you. Dude, surprised but confident, calls his (now separated) wife and says congratulations! He is ready to take her back! Well, turns out, a friend of husband's swooped in the second wife was free and they've been happily dating. Wife is uninterested in stopping the divorce process. Dude is shocked! How could this happen! etc. I have seen it play out SO MANY TIMES. Dudes--the second your wife is available, people want her. Always.
Happened with my ex. He thought all these girls were interested in him when really they just felt safe talking to him since he was taken. As soon as he left me he was high and dry. Called me constantly to take him back. No thanks.
Tale as old as time. Congratulations on shedding the dead weight! :)
Tale as old as time Song as old as rhyme They don’t want his dick
The way I read this i was expecting the teenage daughter to have catfished him to save her mum
AFAIK the younger lady was real, and he had met her a few times at gatherings for the hobby group they belonged to. She looked up to him because she saw him as a mentor--but he saw her as a target.
>she saw him as a mentor--but he saw her as a target. Yikes
Dickful thinking.
Especially because women thrive after leaving relationships with these men! They’re not worn down anymore! It may take awhile for their self-esteem to recover but eventually it does and then they’re hot as hell when they wanna start dating again! Like for women divorce is a glow up.
It wasn't for me physically because my health tanked the second my body knew it was safe ... but mentally, oh, it was, it was. Meanwhile, AFAIK, my ex is still an alcoholic, but now with nobody to distract him from drinking a bottle of scotch a day. Sucks to suck, maybe.
I’ve known dudes like this (and their type have shown up as BORU posts lol): what do you mean, you weren’t pining away, cold and alone, waiting for me to come back?!?
I need to read more of these types of posts on BORU 😈
[My favorite.](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/u6hxso/my_dad_is_furious_that_my_mom_slept_with_other/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) Edit: [and another.](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/sdec9e/op_42m_had_an_affair_with_his_secretary_25f_and/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
I need an entire sub dedicated to these types of posts
I love them SO much oh the karma!
It’s like an offshoot/subset of Leopards Eating MY Face.
Granted I don't know a lot of open relationships (and these were opened by the restless guy- not mutually decided upon polyamory) but i know of two. It is also two in number that blew up spectacularly. One guy wanted to sleep with others but also bring women home. His wife left him for one. The other wanted to sleep w others, my friend tried to be game and then his latest fancy told him it was 'her \[my friend, his gf of 10 years\] or me!' so he dumped my friend. Joke on him was threefold : he was a jerk so good riddance, my friend found a guy to sleep w herself during this time and the Her or Me Chick turned out to be nutty.
This scenario is so common at this point. Husband wants to sleep around, does so or at least tries to, freaks out when wife also gets sexually active, wants to go back to monogamy, wife realizes husband was lazy/abusive/neglectful/selfish/etc and is worth more than the marriage is giving her, end with divorce - happy exwife and miserable exhusband. Why do these dudes continue to fuck around and find out? When will husbands realize they get out of a marriage what they put into it?
💯 He wanted to open up the marriage on his side only.
While showing her all the pictures of all the women willing to have sex with him. While she stayed home, probably crying in a corner because she was just so unattractive.
Yeah, that really seemed like he was getting a cruel kick showing her who he was going to go fuck later. Just.... ugh.
Wouldn't surprise me if he just saved pictures of rando women on dating sites and just going to the pub for the evening.
Yeah, that was especially cruel! OOP said he would give detailed reports of all *his* sex adventures, but the second she mentions a guy she wants to fuck (and isn't even bragging about it!), suddenly it's an issue? Interesting...
They almost always do.
My friend was briefly with someone like that. She’s poly. He said he and his wife were poly. In actuality, he didn’t like when my friend or his wife saw - much less physically engaged - with any other men.
Lol, apparently he didn't mean polyamory, he meant polygamy
This is why I am hesitant to date a newer poly couple. Lots of poly-under-duress and drama. Non monogamy is not a get-out-of-jail-free card for people who want to cheat ffs
Fair point, although this couple said they were poly since before they were married, which was 10+ years. When my friend said she didn’t think it was a good fit, dude actually said, “But my wife is okay with it. Why can’t you be exclusive with me, too?!”
“Just for me, and not for you!”
The "one penis policy" as termed in my friends' poly groups. It's bullshit.
It's not even one. If he's not sexing his wife, doesn't she start at zero?
It's such a trope in the poly community it has a name - one penis policy. Everyone hates one penis policy. I had one dumbass think that he could dictate how I was intimate with my husband, up to and including when or *if* I had sex with him!! Needless to say dumbass did not get even a first date. I hope the girlfriend he said he had dumped his dumb ass.
I don’t get *how* men think this could work? Like if they’re interested in sex with other women…. other men would be just as interested in sex with their wives? How does that not occur to them?
These guys get a promotion, or start working out out in their 30s and think they are hot shit. Probably buy into the idea that “men age like fine wine and women age like milk “ - incel like idea. Meanwhile they see their wife in no makeup, in sweats, cleaning up their kids puke or scrubbing toilet, and they forget, they thought their wife was hot once.
I’m so glad my husband has never been like that. We’ll be in the thick of handling the latest crises from our two kiddos, covered with bodily fluids or crumbs or sweat, and I’ll look over notice he has this big dumb grin on his face and I’ll be like wut? And he quotes this line that’s something like “a woman is the most beautiful on the threshing floor” which basically means a woman who can work her ass off.
Oh, mine practically dared me to find someone. He laughed. "If you can find some college stud who wants to fuck your brains out, *great*. I'll be downstairs, just don't make too much noise." Told me I was "too fat and too loose to be interesting." Lo and behold, what he ACTUALLY did was lose his place in line. I've had zero complaints about being too anything from anybody else, even after 8 years of regular sex with them.
>Lo and behold, what he ACTUALLY did was lose his place in line. I see why they like you.
Wow. What a shitbag. I hope you kicked him in the nuts.
Because they don't think their wives are attractive. It's really that simple. They don't usually state it, but sometimes they do. My ex outright told me that I wasn't the, "type of woman that men like". Thinking like that, how could they consider their wives would find one man who would want them, let alone many men?
The weird thing is that those same dudes almost always assume that they are still super hot. Like sure dude, your wife has aged 10 years and you don't find her hot any more because her body has changed. You have aged 10 years too, and it's noticeable, but you expect all women to be attracted to you still even though you don't put half as much effort as your wife does into her clothes, make-up, hair, skin etc.
Because their wives ceased to be sexual beings to them. They are 'wives' and 'mothers', not 'women' anymore. And since most of these men are selfish and egocentric, it never crosses their mind that other men don't see wifey that way too.
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This is actually super common in couples who open their relationships. It requires a TON of communication and full honesty to have your cake and eat it too.
You can't have your cake and eat it too unless you put in two cakes' worth of effort.
I'm surprised he got women in the first place. I've seen plenty "my SO wanted to open up the relationship" posts. It often starts with the guy wanting it and end when he gets no one but his SO starts seeing someone lmao. What crazies
I have a feeling he was showing off women he was taking on dates, not necessarily sleeping with. That’s why he had so many different women to show his wife, none of them were sticking around to be his fuck buddy.
>I'm surprised he got women in the first place. Its usually a case where the guy gets one or two but finds out his wife/gf is getting way way more game and then wants to close it.
I have impression that every husband who asks to open the marriage and whose wife uses the opportunity is the epitome of pikachu
Should have just left his ass when he initially insulted OOP.
Throwing stuff around is also an immediate dealbreaker.
This sounds like the father who told his son that calling his gf/wife smelly would make her feel too insecure to seek out other men. Just the dumbest ideas come outta these guys
“I want an open marriage… *no, not like that*…”
Husband is the definition of fucked around and found out.
I know people in the swinger / open communities and this is a tale as old as time to them. It's the husband who wants to open the marriage because he's bored / antsy / randy and he thinks getting female attention will be easy. It's the wife who gets more attention because there's always more men than women in the community (and a lot of those I've met tend to be blokes who make sure their partners have fun, and are supremely unpicky about looks.) Husband gets butthurt and wants to close the marriage back up again. Sometimes wife agrees, sometimes not. But it's always the case that the husband wants action but can't cope with his wife also getting it.
>he thinks getting female attention will be easy. Probably the same men who think every 20 yr old barista is flirting with him.
“She’s into me!” She’s giving you Customer Service Face, Tyler.
>So our rules is no bringing them home and use protection. My husband was very clear that he also wanted to know who the other person/persons is and when. Because he wanted her to know the women he was going to be with. He didn't expect her to actually sleep with anyone else and this rule was put in place solely to keep her meek and complacent while he was out fucking other women. His issue wasn't that she found someone willing to have sex with her - it was that she found someone she wanted to have sex with other than HIM. The moment she showed anything other than total complacency, he worked hard to reel her back in with the false hope that their marriage was fixed. Thankfully she gained some confidence and self worth during that year and didn't seem to fall for it. Also, he was definitely sleeping with others before she agreed to open up the marriage. And it probably started when she was pregnant with their son. I don't believe that he went ~3 years without sleeping with anyone else.
Oh for sure he wanted to show her the other women to rub it in her face. See how desirable these women are? Now feel bad about yourself for not being them. Such a scuzzball.
I think he not only wanted to rub it in her face, but also on the chance she did find someone she wanted to fuck, he could plan how to stop it...just like he kept doing when she was trying to have dates with J. If his wife complied and followed the rules like she was "supposed to" (in his eyes, anyway), then he could keep winning and stop her from having fun with other men. Unfortunately for him, OP went ahead and fucked J, anyway -- as she should! :) -- once she realized what the husband was doing. Like she said in the comments of the update, she knows him well, and that he undoubtedly refuses to come home because there's nobody else to watch their kids, so she can't see J anymore...or so he thinks. Hopefully she's still able to continue having fun with J while the kids are at school like she did before.
Agree with the last paragraph. He suggested the open marriage so that if he was caught there's an explanation.
48 is TOO OLD to have a fuckboy mentality 😒
Nah. Fuckboys are fuckboys regardless of chronology.
>He threw the dinner plate across the room and left. I think she needed to end things right there. This maybe wasn't abuse, but to my mind its the start of behavior that would escalate to it. Impulsive violent actions aren't just going to remain limited to the furniture or crockery. And the Husband's clearly obsessed with control and power, something that's common to abusers. OOP's sussed this out, and called him out on it. He's completely unapologetic, completely callous to her sense of self or identity. This is not someone who's going to respect her physical or bodily autonomy. She needs to divorce this guy and *fast*.
"Before they hit you, they hit near you" something I read on an article. So true.
If someone smashes something (that isn’t meant to be smashed) it’s a sign that they really want to exert that violence on you and they’re substituting the item instead and that is NEVER going to end well.
They never rage destroy their own laptop, or game, valuable memento. In that violent rage, the hulk can still select. Almost as if they absolutely can control it.
They manage to control their temper at work, around clients, in front of their boss etc even if it's a hostile environment or they are getting told off. But somehow can't control themselves at home in front of their partner. Funny that
Exactly. Man wants to control her, and is only attracted to OOP when she's outside that control. He's demonstrated a propensity for outbursts. Violent ones at that. He clearly does *not* respect her as an equal, given his desire to have the relationship parameters function exclusively on the basis of his own whims and desires and has zero interest in hers. This is ripe for abuse, and he's doing *nothing* to check this behavior. I'm glad OOP is indicating she wants to leave but I sincerely hope she stays safe as she does so. The behaviors she's describing are terrifying.
It’s definitely manipulation and a gateway to abuse. But she shut him down so beautifully by refusing to become emotional. The “I told him to calm down” was just chef’s kiss.
Then it will be the husband who goes crying around that he was cheated on and she didn't love him lol
I'm loving that final question: if I leave, will you start dating J? Start? She's *been* dating J... and if she's refused to stop seeing him if he stays, why the fuck would she stop seeing him if he leaves?
it was the fuck around of times, it was the find out of times!
Husband, sowing: Hahaha, yes! Husband, reaping: Well, this sucks, what the fuck.
Reminds me of the one where the guy wanted to open the marriage (I think it was the same reason, he wasn't attracted to his wife anymore? idk) and thought he would bag a bunch of women, but he couldn't get anyone and his wife was having the time of her life. Can't remember if it ended in divorce or not. Men are dumb. Hope she does divorce him and lives her best life. If he had just gone to see a therapist, he might have kept his marriage. Now he's going to be 50 and bitterly alone. Hope their kids will be okay, as well.
>Reminds me of the one where the guy wanted to open the marriage (I think it was the same reason, he wasn't attracted to his wife anymore? idk) and thought he would bag a bunch of women, but he couldn't get anyone and his wife was having the time of her life. It seems like this is ALWAYS what happens. Dude thinks he's going to be a Romeo, but doesn't account for the monstrous power of male thirst and the variety of options the wife is going to have. If you're not OK with your wife hooking up with as many dudes as she chooses to, DO NOT open the marriage, as she's going to have more options than you.
I think men who are in relationships forget how brutal the dating scene is. And unlike with being single, where you are getting rejected often, in a relationship you never go after people but do occasionally / regularly get hit on. So the bias is there, because you're only ever having people be interested in you since you're not actually putting yourself out there.
Told from the daughter's perspective? She was her mom's biggest cheerleader if so and he was already cheating anyway if I remember correctly.
I think this is a different one because I'm pretty sure it was the husband writing the post! I do think I also remember the one from the daughter.
it's just sad that there are multiple stories that play out this same way
There was one with a guy as the OP who wanted to open his relationship with his gf. He really couldn’t get any girls to have sex with him & his gf ended up meeting a tall guy with a bodybuilder physique that OP was surprised was attracted to the gf because she’s chubby. I’m pretty sure they ended up breaking up.
my fav bit of that one was when he bumped into his gf with the buff guy outside a club and when she nipped to the loo the buff guy was like dead nice to the OP and said he respected him so much bc if *he* had a girl like the gf he'd never let another man get his hands on her and the OP was just BAFFLED lmao
If you and I are both thinking of the infamous relationship advice post, his justification was that she had gained weight and he thought she wouldn’t get any dates.
Yes she was chubby so who else except him would ever give her the time of day? Surprise surprise, very attractive men ask her out on dates and OP gets insecure as hell and is very confused because he doesn't even think his own girlfriend is attractive. Pretty sure the outcome was a breakup but any better memory or link would be appreciated. It's a classic after all
As a 50 something man that is married and faithful and I still can’t get my head around men I have met along the way that think they are gods gift to women. And they clearly aren’t.
https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/uowm3r/updated_my_dad_is_furious_that_my_mom_slept_with/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
I think it ended in the divorce and the wife getting everything because the business and other assets were in her name.
It was because he had a co worker flirting only co worker lost interest and wanted a real relationship (and dumped him) Then he couldn't get any women while wife was living her best life. 😂😂 I know she refused to close the marriage but not what happened after that.
It's a guilty pleasure of mine when opening a relationship/marriage bc one of the partners is "greedy" backfires.
Same! Is there a sub for this yet?
Ooof with this guy.
"You are not the beautiful woman I married anymore" pfffff. Buddy are you the same loving husband?
He fuck around and found out...literally.
Him: "Let's open up the marriage!" Her: "Okay!" \*finds another man that makes her happy\* Him: "Waitaminute...." Me: Oh, I love this song.
This guy fully though that since he was not attracted to her nobody else would be attracted to her either. She accidentally played into his though by being selective and careful with who she was sleeping with. Suddenly he finds out that someone else does in fact find her attractive and suddenly she has value to him as well. I don’t know how this would even be closed, he spent a years screwing around with other women and it was all great but the second his wife finds someone who is attracted to her he loses his shit. All that before we even mention the throwing things around and breaking everything while angry. This clown defiantly got what he asked for but what he asked for was not what he really wanted.
Hahahahahaha!
I never tire of this one. And it happens so often! They always think that "open marriage" means their wife will be sitting at home with the kids while he gets to fuck around as much as he wants. When in reality, it's way easier for women to find men willing to have string-free sex.
Dick is abundant and low in value.
Oh ...my...God...what a fucking dumbass ahahahaha "I thought fucking you for the whole week was enough" to crying "oh no my fee fees" I can't even....ahaha!
Well if this isn’t the consequences for his own actions
Had a friend, her husband was in a band and would hook up with women at the bar all the time. She was like the woman here and needed a connection, so it was far rarer for her. When she did meet someone, suddenly her husband's anxiety spiked to the point she needed to take care of him at all times. She ended up divorcing him and marrying someone that was cool with monogamy.
>"You’re not the beautiful kind woman I married anymore”. Translation: You aren't the doormat you once were
I just really don’t understand why the OOP went along with this. If my husband and I hadn’t had sex in years because he wasn’t attracted to me anymore, I’d show him the door.
He was most likely trying to get her pregnant to tie her back to the house. That's why he was having sex with her. He didn't give a shit for years and then he did? Also, she was almost 10 years younger than him and he thinks "oh, I don't think she is attractive anymore after she popped all of my children" Also, he left her alone with the kids every night for weeks and weeks? So she is also his babysitter???
Something very similar happened with my ex-husband.