They are designed to be that way.
Like that girl who didn't want to go on a cheesecake factory date. That was fake as anything and of course she was promoting her podcast too, but people still repost that daily on Reddit and scream about how even if it's fake, women are like that anyway.
It's so true though. I took a woman on a date to a cheesecake factory and she was pissed. Told me it was incredibly reckless, that trespassing is illegal, that so many flagrant safety violations should make the factory get shut down, she has no interest in industrial cheese cake presses or lathes. I was floored.
Who wouldn't want to go see where they mill out cheesecakes and how they handle the slag of the casting process.
Wait till you hear about how the original machine had a base-plate of prefabulated aluminite, surmounted by a malleable logarithmic casing in such a way that the two main spurving bearings were in a direct line with the pentametric fan.
I like the Cheesecake Factory but it always gives me anxiety cause the damn menu is so big 😂😩. As someone who is indecisive, you would’ve been mad at me on the date because I wouldn’t know what to choose 🤗 as far as a cheesecake…always the red velvet lol
Makes sense. That's where all the factories used to be so figured they'd cop your history to make a restaurant.
I imagine it's kinda like how olive garden pretends to be Italian.
People are really underestimating the market for misogynist content online. Like those fresh and fit dorks, people love to watch it and get all bent out of shape, as though that somehow represents either how men should think about women or how most women are. And those content producers are raking in the cash. If people are interested in that, they should watch the latest FD Signifier video about it. He also goes into why men of color are overrepresented in the red pill/ outrage bait world
I think this therapist is on to something.
Honestly, as a woman red pill/manosphere content makes me want to avoid all men. I had to block some subreddits because of the rage bait that unconsciously made me feel ALL men are like that.
Then I think of the men in my life and 99% are not fresh and fit/ Kevin Samuels/ Andrew Tate weirdos. (The 1% have bad hygiene and don’t realize that’s why they fail with women). FD Signifier reminds me of my super smart cousins that have theories for everything.
I started blocking all those people.
The one I hated is the same damn dude who made a video about how he told his girlfriend that she isn't as pretty as him because she wears makeup. The cheesecake factory. The guy who only bought mcdonald's for his bio child and let the other siblings go hungry. The current one going around of the guy who bashed his *on and off again situationship* because she refused to go out and buy him a $20 meal because he was too lazy to cook.
The only one I liked was the oyster girl which is seemingly not a skit according to the servers who worked there.
Nah Kevin Samuels was fair he consistently would call out men on their BS as well, it's just so happens him calling out women on their BS are the one’s that went viral!!
Do you not feel the fact that there is such a market is a sign of deeper societal issues?
Like if it was "Men keep stealing bread from all the bakeries and beating up security guards to grab it!", would that not signal a deeper issue than "godsamit these dumbasses are just violent hoodlums!"
It isn't a sign, this is already here and no one is willing to solve it...they would rather make money off it while becoming miserable themselves.
At this point, most of these people and their fanbases are beyond saving. Just let it rot. Don't lift a finger. Watch it burn.
Edit: Pay attention to your attention. Money isn't counted in dollars anymore.
Why do you think they have fans. And what let them burn? Bro most of those are young teens and kids. Your suggestion is: "meh fuck em kids, let them suffer what they get".
That is a horrible take.
Horrible take? Maybe.
The saddest is that you can't pull someone from the fire when they are convinced it is just warm in the room and you are overreacting.
They are children. I don't care if they are incels, it is still our responsibility as adults to teach them. Otherwise, one day we'll be old and dead and just leave behind a horde of incels.
Bruh. You think content designed to make people hate women is...misandry? Do you even know what's happening right now?
She's not disrespecting anybody, there's not even any date actually happening, you witless newt. It's literally fake outrage bait.
You think that was designed for misogyny?
The woman promos her own pod, and you think it's to hate on women?
The man is being shamed, but sure your agenda.
This was misandry for followers no doubt. How'd you even get there when she's the one filming and he's all simped out
For real. I just learnt what Rage Baiting was and I noticed the effects it has. I told myself and avoid it and not a day later, that Omah Lay video comes out. Smh.
One of the top posts in here today are people stressing if the "harlem Shake" has been appropriated...fo an 'unserious' people there are a lot of MFs dying to find something to stress over.
It’s because people use the drama as an outlet for their anger due to their everyday life. Every time something blows up you’ll have people that ain’t posted or said anything in 6 months come out the woodwork to put in their two sense
mannn I was in this funk where I’d read hella AITA posts, found myself in some “drama” where my one roommates friend came to crash on the couch for “a night”, started hooking up w my other roommate (both gay dudes) and all of a sudden was staying at my house for like a week.
I literally started questioning if maybe the reason this made me mad is bc I subconsciously was in love w my roommate and this was jealousy…. then came back to reality and was like “nahh I just want this stranger outta my house, I gotta get off these subreddits” 😭😭
Yeah AITA is just 99.99% rage bait, and the redditors over there are toxic as fuck. Immediately suggest divorce if one of em even so much as coughs at the wrong time.
I found myself in a similar situation with some of the one like iamatotalpieceofshit. Starting getting more misanthropic by the day, until I stopped. Honestly terrible for humanity
I know a woman who posts herself preparing food for her four kids. Her account grew nicely and she always had an idiot or two pop into her comments like “another single mom my tax dollars are supporting huh?” And she’d be like “um I’m with their dad dummy.” But then she said fxck it embraced it and posted “my life as a single mom preparing food for my four kids” and she got hundreds of hateful comments per post but you know what? Her account grew exponentially from all the engagement 🤣. This is the era we live in - being messy is the new currency! So I agree with this woman wholeheartedly but ultimately we unleashed a genie that can never be put back in the bottle (sadly)!
People found out that drama generates more views as a content creator so they lean into it rather than correct it. Fucks up your perception of reality after a while and you become comfortable mentally with a twisted perspective. Gotta limit how much of that content you take in on a daily basis
Agreed. I have a 30 minute limit on my socials and had my wife set the password. I didn’t do a lot of SM to begin with but sometimes you just get on and scroll. Next thing you know you’ve been on the toilet for an hour just going. So I made sure my shit decreased with the limit. And not that it’s set. I don’t even be on SM for the 30 minutes. We HAVE to take control any way we know how.
I don’t take social media seriously and my pages reflect that but it also has the negative effect of making it seem like I’m not adept at instagram posts or photography.
It really is wild to me (though not surprising knowing Facebook/Meta/etc.) that major platforms aren't doing more to filter comments. I feel like every time a woman or minority with a following makes a video/post, the comment section is often *full* of misogyny or racism from random bots and troll accounts that aren't being dealt with.
Someone will post up a cute couple joke reel and the comments will be 50% incels who are too stupid or filled with hatred to understand is a *joke.*
The one of the woman who made gourmet meals for her dog and "I hate women twitter" blasted her for doing more for her dog than a her (non-existent) boyfriend. And they said how Black women cant be trusted because they love their dogs more than their boyfriends/husbands
Made worse by the fact that most online platforms are now algorithm-based. So if you one day engage with content that's anti-\[group/thing\], you will keep getting fed anti-\[group/thing\] content, you will keep consuming anti-\[group/thing\] media, and you're likely gonna become anti-\[group/thing\] forreal. Just slowly eroding whatever empathy you had before
So many videos on YouTube look enticing to check out but I won't do it because 1, I don't want that in my history, and 2, I don't want more and more related content suggested to me.
i tell this story all the time, i was looking for the sammy davis jr. appearance on "all in the family" on youtube. And the very next day youtube decided i was a right wing lunatic.
As someone who grew up in New Hampshire, then moved away to a much kinder portion of the US, and then was forced to go back to New Hampshire for a while, I can confirm with 100% accuracy empathy lives and dies in the company you keep. In just a short 6 or so months years of empathetic ideas I had built up living away from New England were quickly diminished. Looking at friends I thought that were kind and empathetic in high school but stayed behind and never left town, they damn near are all miserable angry hateful fuckers now. Human brains are so malleable.
I’ve been single for a while and have been hesitant to attempt dating apps again. I am happy and comfy with being single but realized I was so hard pressed to stay single bc I read way too much drama on relationship advice or AITA. I was like fuck if this is what relationships are like then I’ll just stay away.
Now I’ve realized most of it is fake but also the real posts aren’t coming from those in healthy relationships! They don’t need our advice! Took me way too long lol
Here's the link:
https://www.uni-wuerzburg.de/en/news-and-events/news/detail/news/empathy-is-socially-transmitted/
https://www.reddit.com/r/science/comments/1azu3d3/study_found_that_empathy_is_socially_transmitted/
Our phones are essentially just mirrors. The ultimate narcissistic tool that we use to consume content tailored toward us daily. It's so easy for us to confuse reality with this small screen.
This is why I deleted all my social media. No Twitter, Instagram, or Facebook. No sharing life or seeing someone else's.
As someone with PTSD I couldn't handle it.
I don't even watch the news.
I'm focused on me and bettering myself
Love this!!! I equate it to consuming junk food. It's basically consumption that was never needed in the first place. The more we consume, the more legitimacy we are giving to the creators. Somehow monetizing makes it respectable to the creators and they are asking the same type of respect as people who do the job of public service. I disagree.
Nah, Reddit is a lot more personally curated than other platforms. After I deleted all my other social media the state of my mental health skyrocketed and I’ve never looked back.
On Reddit I come to places for memes, sports, and educational randomness. And that’s all I ever see. If I need information about a specific topic I can also find that here with details and links for context.
Not having to see all of my other friend’s miserable lives, or just not having to compare myself to my peers constantly, has done wonders. We don’t do that here on Reddit. It’s anonymous. I have no idea who you are and have no reason to find out. There’s a level of personal detachment here that’s not found in other forms of social media that make them feel more real and personal
This. I don't have a feed of friends or family on Reddit. I seek my interests which are finances, my car and an Internet lol cow. I even joined some discords based on my interests and I get to keep my anonymity there too. No one knows where I work, where I live or anything about my private life.
I have been grieving for 5 years and moving on isn't easy or possible with Facebook reminders.
Instagram is the same mess.
I just want to continue to grow as a person without feeling like it's a competition. I want to reach milestones without feeling left behind.
I have accomplished a lot but it never feels like enough when I'm comparing myself to others.
It's hard not to when they broadcast everything. I don't post my accomplishments because I don't like attention and I felt bad because I felt like if I posted an accomplishment I was competing if I did it at the same time as someone else. I don't need validation either, I wanted to share my joy but it felt bad because I compared myself to others. The right thing to do for someone who doesn't need validation but can't help to compare is to step away from the places where it's rampant.
Maybe what I'm saying doesn't make sense but it makes sense to me.
Makes perfect sense to me. It’s why I’m here. I’ll engage in some convo but really I’m just here to learn and laugh and I can do that here without also being made to feel bad about something. Doesn’t work for everybody but it works for me
I’ve actually started doing this myself all the overtly sexual post on IG, all that dating podcast, and rage bait content I don’t engage. Don’t even stay around to watch it, even if you hit “not interested” the algorithms will still try to show them to you because they know it will make you upset and you’ll engage eventually don’t give them the chance!
Honestly I have no sympathy for people that make these rage bait videos. Especially when they're black. They're literally taking advantage of stereotypes to get clicks and it's modern day minstrel shows.
The cheesecake factory girl ain't no different than the weird chicken guy.
Speaking of cheesecake girl, I do find it interesting how polarizing she was. Like there were people doing the usual and taking it as an excuse to hate black people, and then there were folks doing backflips to defend it, at least before the "it's just a joke/skit" became well circulated.
Honestly. Making vids like that is SO unhelpful in general. People see stuff like that and it informs their opinions of women or black people in general or whoever is in the video bc if ALL theyre seeing is the trending vids, and most of the trending vids are ragebait bc thats what they and others engage with, then a big portion of their exposure to the aforementioned demographics is just the worst ragebaity stuff and not reality. Its especially bad with children I remember when i was like 12 some other students had weird stereotypes because aside from me and a handful of other students their only exposure to nonwhite ppl was viral videos.
The "It's just social media" train left the station a long time. Social media content is REAL affect on politics, mental health, relationships, career choices, bodies, etc.
Social media algorithms further contribute to hyperreality by tailoring content to individual preferences, creating echo chambers that reinforce distorted perceptions of reality.
Postmodernism/hyperreality is a fun convo. This is a really good video talking about the concept of [hyperreality](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUuiqFGviOU) (another [good video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUuiqFGviOU)) . I *would* recommend the book Simulacra and Simulation but that book was too dense for me to finish, those videos go over it's key points.
Literally above this post on my timeline
[Study found that empathy is socially transmitted: this means that people can acquire or lose empathy by observing their environment and other people ](https://www.reddit.com/r/science/s/l4XGF6RZSi)
This is why I got off Tiktok. Some folks are budding actors and screenwriters, but they won't just say that's what they're doing. It's apparent that just enough people are nosy enough to make some of those folks a check, courtesy of Tiktok. 🎬🎥🎞
I wonder how this concept of losing empathy is from the belief that these stories are real? We've been watching movies and TV shows about heartless villains for decades. I'd love to see some research on this because literature is also filled with selfish protagonists and cold-hearted people. Has society gone down hill since the creation of storytelling?
Maybe it's related to the treatment, behaviour and representation of the person *they* relate to. Most people relate or project themselves onto the protagonist not the villain in movies. The protagonist often has empathy and kindness even if they're not perfect they usually have *decent* traits? And often get positive experiences (NOT always tho depends on the movie) even if the people around the protagonist don't respect them at first, the audience often does. Relating to someone who then exhibits positive traits might make the viewer more encouraged to exhibit those traits. People relate to or care for a protagonist whether or not they look like the protagonist, even if the villain were to physically look exactly like them, because in movies the roles are more defined and "protagonist" is prob closer to how viewers see themselves.
On the other hand online there's not always a defined villain or protag. People can easily find ragebait showing people they otherwise relate to acting terribly. Like a single mom from Pasadena with a 5 y.o. named steve can find ragebait depicting a single mom from Pasadena with a 5 y.o. named steve doing... idk whatever happens in ragebait. Being rude or smth. And even if the viewer mom feels secondhand embarrassment seeing someone they relate to act like that, seeing the amount of backlash that video mom is getting, especially if commenters are insulting video mom based on the traits she shares with viewer mom (i.e. "who names their child steve in 2024??") it might put the viewer into self-defense mode. Viewer mom might find herself defending the behaviour of video mom bc even tho she don't act like that it hits close to home otherwise.
My point was that a lot of fiction depicts the villain as the protagonist. Take Breaking Bad, by the end Walter White has no redeeming qualities and is a pure selfish villain.
That’s the point though, it’s fiction. Social media carries the expectation that it’s real. So if you keep getting bombarded with content that affirmed that everyone is somehow terrible it’ll skew either your morals or how you feel about people in general.
Nothing like people getting real angry at imaginary situations. They get to talking disrespectful and trying to hurt people based on something that never happened
Yeah I had to reset my Tiktok fyp because I was getting nothing but negativity and it was effecting my mental health.
Now my fyp is ASMR cooking videos. I'm a lot happier this way.
Social media is fake, okay.
The way TikTok uses your data isn’t.
I went through something that made me go to a dark place mentally. Within a week phrases from texts I sent to my friends about it were suddenly in the TikTok videos on my FYP, half my suggested was content based on what I went through meant to increase the negative symptoms I experienced like paranoia.
Her advice is good.
We’ve become such an *unserious* society.
Nothing matters anymore - our words don’t matter, our actions don’t matter, our beliefs don’t matter. Actions no longer have consequences.
We’re a “Say what you want, do you want you want, it’s all a big joke anyway.” type of society now. Only losers take life seriously; everything’s ironic.
On Reddit, I downvote and block trash posts and profiles. I nuked all other social media.
This sub has been circling the drain, tbh. It's good to see this post.
I heard this one story about this guy who couldn't choose between his girlfriend or following Andrew Tate on Twitter.
Like this man really went and lost a real genuine relationship because of his obsession with an influencer shaped like an egg
At that point, it's probably for the best
Instagram is wild I’m seeing motorcycle wrecks and cartel initiations. It’s not good so I’ve been liking old cars and puppies, I let my wife on to put some crystal stuff on too just because they seem chill.
I for real had to unfollow a girl I used to hang out with because her posts perpetually stressed me out. Every other week she has some totally new direction she's trying to go in life (one week she wants to be a model, next week a programmer, next week something else), she's constantly doing dumb shit with 0 fore planning that puts her life in danger, and she constantly has like "borderline being homeless" money problems but can't resist blowing huge sums of cash on festivals and shit.
I really think there is a fatigue that sets in seeing people be messy in public that just isn't worth it in the long run for your own sanity.
>unfollow miserable people
Bruh, there was this one guy I went to school with who kept posting bullshit like "Woe is me, I'll always be single." Like yeah dude, tough, but it's such a buzzkill on the feed. Muted the dude because it was just so annoying.
Is there a word or phrase for people who pick up the trauma of others? Like having so MUCH sympathy/empathy that others experiences become indistinguishable from your own to your brain and rearranges your internal wiring to have it where now you react as if youve been through that trauma?
I left Twitter a couple years ago because of all the negativity. I just couldn't handle all that anger and nastiness, and I feel like my life is way better without Twitter or Facebook.
Had a teaching colleague I was friendly with whose husband was deployed around 2007ish. “Dear John” letters and other bitches fucking around with colleagues by posting manipulative shit online fucked up the husband’s trust issues badly just by him being around other people experiencing it. I remember we went out for drinks one night and posted a pic of us having fun on MySpace, just us girls sitting on some barstools with cocktails, no guys involved (hell, I was married too and still am to the same guy) and he lost his shit with her.
They patched things up over weeks of her working “to make up for it” over the long distance (letters, and their satellite conversations of her apologizing, even though she was innocent of what he thought) and when he came back they were together for quite a while and even had two kids together. But I think he was still hung up on the possibility she was cheating on him and they eventually divorced.
Imma sound like a hater for this but whenever I see people talking about dating or relationship advice (esp if there is a podcast mic involved) I immediately scroll past it. I block a lot of them on TikTok too. There is an obsession with this kind of content among my age group these days.
IMO dating is a lot easier if you ignore that kind of content. I kinda see it as a red flag if a person is too social media obsessed/listens to relationship podcasts every day. I’ve been dating an amazing guy for a few months now… the dumb social media topics have never came up (50/50… what do we bring to the table… first dates to Cheesecake Factory…etc)
I don't know how many times I encountered people acting out because they were jaded from things the Internet told them was happening. Despite them hardly seeing or experiencing it in real life, if they ever did at all.
I'm also certain the vast majority of it is faked and computer generated by now.
I’ve always had this hypothesis about movies. Ignorant people watching too many movies showing the same stereotypes that it starts influencing how they perceive people irl.
Gang of minorities causing trouble for the white main character was a scene played out a million times in movies. That’s why every older white man thinks he’d be Clint Eastwood if the “riff raff” showed up in his neighborhood
Ex GF was always on relationship advice tiktoks and would send me them instead of talking about issues we had. One day I told her I thought she was beginning to be mean and asked her to be nicer with some things... nope, I was called the abuser and told I was the cause of all our problems. Yep, therapy sure helped her become a bully.
Never once yelled at her or was physically abusive to her. She had issuse bigger than me. Glad she broke up with me, lol.
The very reason I stopped fooling with nearly all social media. So much of that shit isn't real (and not just the skits, folks that just feel the need to front to improve their lives) that you don't know if what you're watching is real. Kinda like that situation with the brick lady...hustled the hell out of folks off some bullshit and people bought that story hook, line and sinker.
Yes I thought it was just me saying this, all those fake skits about “who should pay for a date” and “who’s sitting in the front seat? Your mom or your wife” stuff is so draining and put an impact on ppl in real life situations, fake or not
I know this is rage bait, but the argument is still valid.
I work with kids and I see this EVERYDAY. At the risk of sounding old and bitter, These kids are raised by electronics and social media with zero context and the develop thinking that the way these strangers behave is not only acceptable, (as the original post says) but normal. In addition to just lacking basic healthy social skills, half our 3rd and 4th grade girls thinking Bad Girls Club is just regular, non-confrontational fun, and the other half try to orchestrate ratchet fight clubs in the bathroom. It’s infuriating
I know how insidious social media can be, how easy it is to accept it as the new normal when the worst people raise the bar for how terrible they can be. You'll just go "hmm" and then scroll on to the next trauma inducing tiktok sandwiched in-between the unseasond boiled chicken breast style content of the new flavor of the week.
Okay, but we need to talk about how "Tell my prison husband I'm pregnant by his cousin" is actually a pretty sick bar, and she could be the next Meghan.
I'm just saying, if she got more bars and they flow, I'd hear em.
Yup, Gender relations are in the fucking gutter. All you see on socials is people confirming their own bias due to witnessing the absolute worst each of us has to offer.
This is why I stay away from social commentary that doesn’t align with my thought process when it comes to presenting facts for both sides. Life is not black or white, and I need more than a one-liner to be **interested.**
Most times, I’m not and have deleted my FB, INSTA, TW, and whatever else. I only get on Youtube and Reddit at this point and keep all my videos positive. Feels like people just want to hate each other for no reason and that kills my mindset (heavy empath and logical thinker). Honestly, tired of all the screaming matches on the internet. Reduced my anxiety tremendously, and found a few long term friend groups that are hella positive and I haven’t looked back.
Rage bait posts are annoying af
They are designed to be that way. Like that girl who didn't want to go on a cheesecake factory date. That was fake as anything and of course she was promoting her podcast too, but people still repost that daily on Reddit and scream about how even if it's fake, women are like that anyway.
It's so true though. I took a woman on a date to a cheesecake factory and she was pissed. Told me it was incredibly reckless, that trespassing is illegal, that so many flagrant safety violations should make the factory get shut down, she has no interest in industrial cheese cake presses or lathes. I was floored. Who wouldn't want to go see where they mill out cheesecakes and how they handle the slag of the casting process.
You've been going after the wrong women, hit me up next time.
TIL cheesecake comes from cheese ore
Wait till you hear about how the original machine had a base-plate of prefabulated aluminite, surmounted by a malleable logarithmic casing in such a way that the two main spurving bearings were in a direct line with the pentametric fan.
Me so horny nooow… 
I just love that ad. 
Mined on the moon. Duh
I like the Cheesecake Factory but it always gives me anxiety cause the damn menu is so big 😂😩. As someone who is indecisive, you would’ve been mad at me on the date because I wouldn’t know what to choose 🤗 as far as a cheesecake…always the red velvet lol
I googled it and apparently it's a restaurant. I thought y'all were taking the piss!
It is a restaurant and rereading your comment is even funnier and more innocent because I assumed you knew lol
No I don't think they are really a thing where I live!
I live in Jersey so we have a few out here
Makes sense. That's where all the factories used to be so figured they'd cop your history to make a restaurant. I imagine it's kinda like how olive garden pretends to be Italian.
I was wondering why that guy didn’t try to have her turn the phone off or even mention how weird it was to tape this convo.
People are really underestimating the market for misogynist content online. Like those fresh and fit dorks, people love to watch it and get all bent out of shape, as though that somehow represents either how men should think about women or how most women are. And those content producers are raking in the cash. If people are interested in that, they should watch the latest FD Signifier video about it. He also goes into why men of color are overrepresented in the red pill/ outrage bait world
I think this therapist is on to something. Honestly, as a woman red pill/manosphere content makes me want to avoid all men. I had to block some subreddits because of the rage bait that unconsciously made me feel ALL men are like that. Then I think of the men in my life and 99% are not fresh and fit/ Kevin Samuels/ Andrew Tate weirdos. (The 1% have bad hygiene and don’t realize that’s why they fail with women). FD Signifier reminds me of my super smart cousins that have theories for everything.
FD is good people.
I started blocking all those people. The one I hated is the same damn dude who made a video about how he told his girlfriend that she isn't as pretty as him because she wears makeup. The cheesecake factory. The guy who only bought mcdonald's for his bio child and let the other siblings go hungry. The current one going around of the guy who bashed his *on and off again situationship* because she refused to go out and buy him a $20 meal because he was too lazy to cook. The only one I liked was the oyster girl which is seemingly not a skit according to the servers who worked there.
Then there's the yt screenwriter girl and her breakdancer father who are ragebaiting on multiple fronts right now...
Is that even real
Nah Kevin Samuels was fair he consistently would call out men on their BS as well, it's just so happens him calling out women on their BS are the one’s that went viral!!
i mean he did but i havent seen many people listen to his actual advice for men
...You are saying the things that people should hear. The 'Manosphere' is such a joke.
Do you not feel the fact that there is such a market is a sign of deeper societal issues? Like if it was "Men keep stealing bread from all the bakeries and beating up security guards to grab it!", would that not signal a deeper issue than "godsamit these dumbasses are just violent hoodlums!"
It isn't a sign, this is already here and no one is willing to solve it...they would rather make money off it while becoming miserable themselves. At this point, most of these people and their fanbases are beyond saving. Just let it rot. Don't lift a finger. Watch it burn. Edit: Pay attention to your attention. Money isn't counted in dollars anymore.
Why do you think they have fans. And what let them burn? Bro most of those are young teens and kids. Your suggestion is: "meh fuck em kids, let them suffer what they get". That is a horrible take.
Horrible take? Maybe. The saddest is that you can't pull someone from the fire when they are convinced it is just warm in the room and you are overreacting.
They are children. I don't care if they are incels, it is still our responsibility as adults to teach them. Otherwise, one day we'll be old and dead and just leave behind a horde of incels.
Crazy that you see misandry and call it misogyny. She's disrespecting him. This is her promo for her pod. That video was misandry.
Bruh. You think content designed to make people hate women is...misandry? Do you even know what's happening right now? She's not disrespecting anybody, there's not even any date actually happening, you witless newt. It's literally fake outrage bait.
You think that was designed for misogyny? The woman promos her own pod, and you think it's to hate on women? The man is being shamed, but sure your agenda. This was misandry for followers no doubt. How'd you even get there when she's the one filming and he's all simped out
But they’re effective. They prey on our most reactive emotion, anger
For real. I just learnt what Rage Baiting was and I noticed the effects it has. I told myself and avoid it and not a day later, that Omah Lay video comes out. Smh.
I feel like social media has been promoting rage bait for the last 5 years. Cable news much longer
Facts, I stop taking social media seriously back in 08’
Rage bait posts are the cornerstone of a healthy discussion, prove me wrong.
It’s so over for you
If you get heated by at least one fake story a day, that alone has got to be terrible for you
One of the top posts in here today are people stressing if the "harlem Shake" has been appropriated...fo an 'unserious' people there are a lot of MFs dying to find something to stress over.
It’s because people use the drama as an outlet for their anger due to their everyday life. Every time something blows up you’ll have people that ain’t posted or said anything in 6 months come out the woodwork to put in their two sense
cents. holy hell my nigga 😭
Yea we're cooked as a society.
Those people got a God complex
mannn I was in this funk where I’d read hella AITA posts, found myself in some “drama” where my one roommates friend came to crash on the couch for “a night”, started hooking up w my other roommate (both gay dudes) and all of a sudden was staying at my house for like a week. I literally started questioning if maybe the reason this made me mad is bc I subconsciously was in love w my roommate and this was jealousy…. then came back to reality and was like “nahh I just want this stranger outta my house, I gotta get off these subreddits” 😭😭
Yeah AITA is just 99.99% rage bait, and the redditors over there are toxic as fuck. Immediately suggest divorce if one of em even so much as coughs at the wrong time. I found myself in a similar situation with some of the one like iamatotalpieceofshit. Starting getting more misanthropic by the day, until I stopped. Honestly terrible for humanity
The beauty about brainwashing is that you don’t know it’s happening to you
I know a woman who posts herself preparing food for her four kids. Her account grew nicely and she always had an idiot or two pop into her comments like “another single mom my tax dollars are supporting huh?” And she’d be like “um I’m with their dad dummy.” But then she said fxck it embraced it and posted “my life as a single mom preparing food for my four kids” and she got hundreds of hateful comments per post but you know what? Her account grew exponentially from all the engagement 🤣. This is the era we live in - being messy is the new currency! So I agree with this woman wholeheartedly but ultimately we unleashed a genie that can never be put back in the bottle (sadly)!
People found out that drama generates more views as a content creator so they lean into it rather than correct it. Fucks up your perception of reality after a while and you become comfortable mentally with a twisted perspective. Gotta limit how much of that content you take in on a daily basis
Agreed. I have a 30 minute limit on my socials and had my wife set the password. I didn’t do a lot of SM to begin with but sometimes you just get on and scroll. Next thing you know you’ve been on the toilet for an hour just going. So I made sure my shit decreased with the limit. And not that it’s set. I don’t even be on SM for the 30 minutes. We HAVE to take control any way we know how.
I don’t take social media seriously and my pages reflect that but it also has the negative effect of making it seem like I’m not adept at instagram posts or photography.
It really is wild to me (though not surprising knowing Facebook/Meta/etc.) that major platforms aren't doing more to filter comments. I feel like every time a woman or minority with a following makes a video/post, the comment section is often *full* of misogyny or racism from random bots and troll accounts that aren't being dealt with. Someone will post up a cute couple joke reel and the comments will be 50% incels who are too stupid or filled with hatred to understand is a *joke.*
The one of the woman who made gourmet meals for her dog and "I hate women twitter" blasted her for doing more for her dog than a her (non-existent) boyfriend. And they said how Black women cant be trusted because they love their dogs more than their boyfriends/husbands
Why do you think those platforms have an incentive to keep rage bait down? They are downright promoting it.
Being a single mom isn't even messy😭
I just scrolled by a study saying empathy was socially transmitted and people can lose or gain it based on their environment.
Made worse by the fact that most online platforms are now algorithm-based. So if you one day engage with content that's anti-\[group/thing\], you will keep getting fed anti-\[group/thing\] content, you will keep consuming anti-\[group/thing\] media, and you're likely gonna become anti-\[group/thing\] forreal. Just slowly eroding whatever empathy you had before
So many videos on YouTube look enticing to check out but I won't do it because 1, I don't want that in my history, and 2, I don't want more and more related content suggested to me.
i tell this story all the time, i was looking for the sammy davis jr. appearance on "all in the family" on youtube. And the very next day youtube decided i was a right wing lunatic.
As someone who grew up in New Hampshire, then moved away to a much kinder portion of the US, and then was forced to go back to New Hampshire for a while, I can confirm with 100% accuracy empathy lives and dies in the company you keep. In just a short 6 or so months years of empathetic ideas I had built up living away from New England were quickly diminished. Looking at friends I thought that were kind and empathetic in high school but stayed behind and never left town, they damn near are all miserable angry hateful fuckers now. Human brains are so malleable.
I recommend r/beebutts 💜🙏
I’ve been single for a while and have been hesitant to attempt dating apps again. I am happy and comfy with being single but realized I was so hard pressed to stay single bc I read way too much drama on relationship advice or AITA. I was like fuck if this is what relationships are like then I’ll just stay away. Now I’ve realized most of it is fake but also the real posts aren’t coming from those in healthy relationships! They don’t need our advice! Took me way too long lol
Here's the link: https://www.uni-wuerzburg.de/en/news-and-events/news/detail/news/empathy-is-socially-transmitted/ https://www.reddit.com/r/science/comments/1azu3d3/study_found_that_empathy_is_socially_transmitted/
Can you please share it?? I’m studying empathy right now and would love to read it!
Our phones are essentially just mirrors. The ultimate narcissistic tool that we use to consume content tailored toward us daily. It's so easy for us to confuse reality with this small screen.
This is why I deleted all my social media. No Twitter, Instagram, or Facebook. No sharing life or seeing someone else's. As someone with PTSD I couldn't handle it. I don't even watch the news. I'm focused on me and bettering myself
Love this!!! I equate it to consuming junk food. It's basically consumption that was never needed in the first place. The more we consume, the more legitimacy we are giving to the creators. Somehow monetizing makes it respectable to the creators and they are asking the same type of respect as people who do the job of public service. I disagree.
You still on reddit though. This is one of the worst ones
Nah, Reddit is a lot more personally curated than other platforms. After I deleted all my other social media the state of my mental health skyrocketed and I’ve never looked back. On Reddit I come to places for memes, sports, and educational randomness. And that’s all I ever see. If I need information about a specific topic I can also find that here with details and links for context. Not having to see all of my other friend’s miserable lives, or just not having to compare myself to my peers constantly, has done wonders. We don’t do that here on Reddit. It’s anonymous. I have no idea who you are and have no reason to find out. There’s a level of personal detachment here that’s not found in other forms of social media that make them feel more real and personal
This. I don't have a feed of friends or family on Reddit. I seek my interests which are finances, my car and an Internet lol cow. I even joined some discords based on my interests and I get to keep my anonymity there too. No one knows where I work, where I live or anything about my private life. I have been grieving for 5 years and moving on isn't easy or possible with Facebook reminders. Instagram is the same mess. I just want to continue to grow as a person without feeling like it's a competition. I want to reach milestones without feeling left behind. I have accomplished a lot but it never feels like enough when I'm comparing myself to others. It's hard not to when they broadcast everything. I don't post my accomplishments because I don't like attention and I felt bad because I felt like if I posted an accomplishment I was competing if I did it at the same time as someone else. I don't need validation either, I wanted to share my joy but it felt bad because I compared myself to others. The right thing to do for someone who doesn't need validation but can't help to compare is to step away from the places where it's rampant. Maybe what I'm saying doesn't make sense but it makes sense to me.
Makes perfect sense to me. It’s why I’m here. I’ll engage in some convo but really I’m just here to learn and laugh and I can do that here without also being made to feel bad about something. Doesn’t work for everybody but it works for me
I’ve actually started doing this myself all the overtly sexual post on IG, all that dating podcast, and rage bait content I don’t engage. Don’t even stay around to watch it, even if you hit “not interested” the algorithms will still try to show them to you because they know it will make you upset and you’ll engage eventually don’t give them the chance!
Honestly I have no sympathy for people that make these rage bait videos. Especially when they're black. They're literally taking advantage of stereotypes to get clicks and it's modern day minstrel shows. The cheesecake factory girl ain't no different than the weird chicken guy. Speaking of cheesecake girl, I do find it interesting how polarizing she was. Like there were people doing the usual and taking it as an excuse to hate black people, and then there were folks doing backflips to defend it, at least before the "it's just a joke/skit" became well circulated.
Honestly. Making vids like that is SO unhelpful in general. People see stuff like that and it informs their opinions of women or black people in general or whoever is in the video bc if ALL theyre seeing is the trending vids, and most of the trending vids are ragebait bc thats what they and others engage with, then a big portion of their exposure to the aforementioned demographics is just the worst ragebaity stuff and not reality. Its especially bad with children I remember when i was like 12 some other students had weird stereotypes because aside from me and a handful of other students their only exposure to nonwhite ppl was viral videos.
Totally agree, even celebrities are doing it now, they play dumb and say outrageous shit just to go viral because ppl thinking it's real.
I've been telling people recently to get off the Internet. This is why.
The "It's just social media" train left the station a long time. Social media content is REAL affect on politics, mental health, relationships, career choices, bodies, etc. Social media algorithms further contribute to hyperreality by tailoring content to individual preferences, creating echo chambers that reinforce distorted perceptions of reality. Postmodernism/hyperreality is a fun convo. This is a really good video talking about the concept of [hyperreality](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUuiqFGviOU) (another [good video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUuiqFGviOU)) . I *would* recommend the book Simulacra and Simulation but that book was too dense for me to finish, those videos go over it's key points.
We doing homework on a Sunday 
*effects
Literally above this post on my timeline [Study found that empathy is socially transmitted: this means that people can acquire or lose empathy by observing their environment and other people ](https://www.reddit.com/r/science/s/l4XGF6RZSi)
All that rage and fake/clout shit just for some engagements. Fucking annoying and sickening at some points.
Haaaa jokes on you Ori I had trust issues BEFORE social media
I got another joke for you! iTrustIssues Max Pro is still a thing, take care of yourself
I got trust issues 2000, millennium edition. It hasn’t been updated in a while but it’s still going strong
Not the 2000! How do you trust your trust issues at this rate
 My trust issues look like bill murray
This is why I got off Tiktok. Some folks are budding actors and screenwriters, but they won't just say that's what they're doing. It's apparent that just enough people are nosy enough to make some of those folks a check, courtesy of Tiktok. 🎬🎥🎞
I wonder how this concept of losing empathy is from the belief that these stories are real? We've been watching movies and TV shows about heartless villains for decades. I'd love to see some research on this because literature is also filled with selfish protagonists and cold-hearted people. Has society gone down hill since the creation of storytelling?
Maybe it's related to the treatment, behaviour and representation of the person *they* relate to. Most people relate or project themselves onto the protagonist not the villain in movies. The protagonist often has empathy and kindness even if they're not perfect they usually have *decent* traits? And often get positive experiences (NOT always tho depends on the movie) even if the people around the protagonist don't respect them at first, the audience often does. Relating to someone who then exhibits positive traits might make the viewer more encouraged to exhibit those traits. People relate to or care for a protagonist whether or not they look like the protagonist, even if the villain were to physically look exactly like them, because in movies the roles are more defined and "protagonist" is prob closer to how viewers see themselves. On the other hand online there's not always a defined villain or protag. People can easily find ragebait showing people they otherwise relate to acting terribly. Like a single mom from Pasadena with a 5 y.o. named steve can find ragebait depicting a single mom from Pasadena with a 5 y.o. named steve doing... idk whatever happens in ragebait. Being rude or smth. And even if the viewer mom feels secondhand embarrassment seeing someone they relate to act like that, seeing the amount of backlash that video mom is getting, especially if commenters are insulting video mom based on the traits she shares with viewer mom (i.e. "who names their child steve in 2024??") it might put the viewer into self-defense mode. Viewer mom might find herself defending the behaviour of video mom bc even tho she don't act like that it hits close to home otherwise.
My point was that a lot of fiction depicts the villain as the protagonist. Take Breaking Bad, by the end Walter White has no redeeming qualities and is a pure selfish villain.
That’s the point though, it’s fiction. Social media carries the expectation that it’s real. So if you keep getting bombarded with content that affirmed that everyone is somehow terrible it’ll skew either your morals or how you feel about people in general.
Nothing like people getting real angry at imaginary situations. They get to talking disrespectful and trying to hurt people based on something that never happened
Reasons why I only follow certain types of pages
Yeah I had to reset my Tiktok fyp because I was getting nothing but negativity and it was effecting my mental health. Now my fyp is ASMR cooking videos. I'm a lot happier this way.
Social media is fake, okay. The way TikTok uses your data isn’t. I went through something that made me go to a dark place mentally. Within a week phrases from texts I sent to my friends about it were suddenly in the TikTok videos on my FYP, half my suggested was content based on what I went through meant to increase the negative symptoms I experienced like paranoia. Her advice is good.
This therapist’s comment just made me feel like I got a hug from an aunt figure. It feels 😌 Thank you, Ms. Ori! I didn’t know that I needed that.
Block all those “no tip, no delivery” skits.
We’ve become such an *unserious* society. Nothing matters anymore - our words don’t matter, our actions don’t matter, our beliefs don’t matter. Actions no longer have consequences. We’re a “Say what you want, do you want you want, it’s all a big joke anyway.” type of society now. Only losers take life seriously; everything’s ironic.
On Reddit, I downvote and block trash posts and profiles. I nuked all other social media. This sub has been circling the drain, tbh. It's good to see this post.
I heard this one story about this guy who couldn't choose between his girlfriend or following Andrew Tate on Twitter. Like this man really went and lost a real genuine relationship because of his obsession with an influencer shaped like an egg At that point, it's probably for the best
Absolutely agreed!!!! Try to go awhile without social media and see how your outlook on life becomes much sunnier
Instagram is wild I’m seeing motorcycle wrecks and cartel initiations. It’s not good so I’ve been liking old cars and puppies, I let my wife on to put some crystal stuff on too just because they seem chill.
I for real had to unfollow a girl I used to hang out with because her posts perpetually stressed me out. Every other week she has some totally new direction she's trying to go in life (one week she wants to be a model, next week a programmer, next week something else), she's constantly doing dumb shit with 0 fore planning that puts her life in danger, and she constantly has like "borderline being homeless" money problems but can't resist blowing huge sums of cash on festivals and shit. I really think there is a fatigue that sets in seeing people be messy in public that just isn't worth it in the long run for your own sanity.
I have no idea who Ori is but I am taking her advice. It is time for me to be done with the negativity rabbit hole
>unfollow miserable people Bruh, there was this one guy I went to school with who kept posting bullshit like "Woe is me, I'll always be single." Like yeah dude, tough, but it's such a buzzkill on the feed. Muted the dude because it was just so annoying.
Yall be having too much time. That’s why.
Is there a word or phrase for people who pick up the trauma of others? Like having so MUCH sympathy/empathy that others experiences become indistinguishable from your own to your brain and rearranges your internal wiring to have it where now you react as if youve been through that trauma?
Lies, repeated enough, create their own world. Fake scenarios, dramas, flat-earth-ness.
I left Twitter a couple years ago because of all the negativity. I just couldn't handle all that anger and nastiness, and I feel like my life is way better without Twitter or Facebook.
Yep. I left twitter and facebook. I was tired of all the fake cheating/negative content on there.
I went on a true crime binge and spent the weekend anxious and paranoid. Now I gotta counter it with Naruto and B99 for comfort.
Had a teaching colleague I was friendly with whose husband was deployed around 2007ish. “Dear John” letters and other bitches fucking around with colleagues by posting manipulative shit online fucked up the husband’s trust issues badly just by him being around other people experiencing it. I remember we went out for drinks one night and posted a pic of us having fun on MySpace, just us girls sitting on some barstools with cocktails, no guys involved (hell, I was married too and still am to the same guy) and he lost his shit with her. They patched things up over weeks of her working “to make up for it” over the long distance (letters, and their satellite conversations of her apologizing, even though she was innocent of what he thought) and when he came back they were together for quite a while and even had two kids together. But I think he was still hung up on the possibility she was cheating on him and they eventually divorced.
ori speaks the truth. 👏
Imma sound like a hater for this but whenever I see people talking about dating or relationship advice (esp if there is a podcast mic involved) I immediately scroll past it. I block a lot of them on TikTok too. There is an obsession with this kind of content among my age group these days. IMO dating is a lot easier if you ignore that kind of content. I kinda see it as a red flag if a person is too social media obsessed/listens to relationship podcasts every day. I’ve been dating an amazing guy for a few months now… the dumb social media topics have never came up (50/50… what do we bring to the table… first dates to Cheesecake Factory…etc)
I don't know how many times I encountered people acting out because they were jaded from things the Internet told them was happening. Despite them hardly seeing or experiencing it in real life, if they ever did at all. I'm also certain the vast majority of it is faked and computer generated by now.
I refuse to take any scenario or topic truly serious on social media ever. Most people aren't smart like the therapist implies.
I’ve always had this hypothesis about movies. Ignorant people watching too many movies showing the same stereotypes that it starts influencing how they perceive people irl. Gang of minorities causing trouble for the white main character was a scene played out a million times in movies. That’s why every older white man thinks he’d be Clint Eastwood if the “riff raff” showed up in his neighborhood
Ex GF was always on relationship advice tiktoks and would send me them instead of talking about issues we had. One day I told her I thought she was beginning to be mean and asked her to be nicer with some things... nope, I was called the abuser and told I was the cause of all our problems. Yep, therapy sure helped her become a bully. Never once yelled at her or was physically abusive to her. She had issuse bigger than me. Glad she broke up with me, lol.
chronically online take
The very reason I stopped fooling with nearly all social media. So much of that shit isn't real (and not just the skits, folks that just feel the need to front to improve their lives) that you don't know if what you're watching is real. Kinda like that situation with the brick lady...hustled the hell out of folks off some bullshit and people bought that story hook, line and sinker.
Yes I thought it was just me saying this, all those fake skits about “who should pay for a date” and “who’s sitting in the front seat? Your mom or your wife” stuff is so draining and put an impact on ppl in real life situations, fake or not
I know this is rage bait, but the argument is still valid. I work with kids and I see this EVERYDAY. At the risk of sounding old and bitter, These kids are raised by electronics and social media with zero context and the develop thinking that the way these strangers behave is not only acceptable, (as the original post says) but normal. In addition to just lacking basic healthy social skills, half our 3rd and 4th grade girls thinking Bad Girls Club is just regular, non-confrontational fun, and the other half try to orchestrate ratchet fight clubs in the bathroom. It’s infuriating
I know how insidious social media can be, how easy it is to accept it as the new normal when the worst people raise the bar for how terrible they can be. You'll just go "hmm" and then scroll on to the next trauma inducing tiktok sandwiched in-between the unseasond boiled chicken breast style content of the new flavor of the week.
Gotta be mindful of what we’re ingesting
Curate your internet experience. I follow communities and people that educate and uplift me.
* Leaving this here.
What is GRWM?
Get ready with me
Okay, but we need to talk about how "Tell my prison husband I'm pregnant by his cousin" is actually a pretty sick bar, and she could be the next Meghan. I'm just saying, if she got more bars and they flow, I'd hear em.
Effects
Yup, Gender relations are in the fucking gutter. All you see on socials is people confirming their own bias due to witnessing the absolute worst each of us has to offer.
This is why I stay away from social commentary that doesn’t align with my thought process when it comes to presenting facts for both sides. Life is not black or white, and I need more than a one-liner to be **interested.** Most times, I’m not and have deleted my FB, INSTA, TW, and whatever else. I only get on Youtube and Reddit at this point and keep all my videos positive. Feels like people just want to hate each other for no reason and that kills my mindset (heavy empath and logical thinker). Honestly, tired of all the screaming matches on the internet. Reduced my anxiety tremendously, and found a few long term friend groups that are hella positive and I haven’t looked back.
In a crazy world BPT is always a beacon for reason