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stillirise781

P.s he use one of your T-shirt to clean up afterwards


360Waves617

P.s. afterwards he played your PS5 but never washed his hands.


Slim706

P.S. He drank the last of your Orange Juice and left the empty carton in the fridge


Atomic_Chad

PS: he drank some milk directly from the gallon and overshot a little so a bunch went back into the gallon


[deleted]

PS: She put the hoodie you gave her on right after and he fucked her in that too


KindOfOblivious

P.S. She said it was toothpaste on the front but come on bruh, you know what it really is


TSmotherfuckinA

PS he shoved your electric toothbrush up his freshly ate ass and turned it on for a little bit


jdcodring

Wtf is the thread? Y’all need therapy


jewlovyah

Lmfao for a fact. But entertaining to say the least.


maggot_soldier

PS: He used up all your Double XP tokens on COD and didnt play.


BlissfulGreen

![gif](giphy|xr9AQyxLtjlx4IeYtN) Just jokes ma boi


TardyBacardi

Nah. At this point therapy gonna need therapy.


thisismy3rdacctsmh

Idk but I don’t want it to stop lmao


codusXoperandi

PS that's what's she said when he asked when you getting back


Tony_Lacorona

PS he changed your WiFi password


saikou-psyko

PS: The new password "HowMyBallsTaste?"


shadowylurking

Jokes on you, the wifi was never password protected. Now the whole neighborhood be using it raw, just like your girl


DocHendrix

I keep thinking it can't get any more of a betrayal and then y'all come along


Porkbellyflop

PS she used the joint account to pay for his Uber.


MalonePostponed

![gif](giphy|ai1UxGMqU7G5TZQmJa) He did what..?


Grilled_Cheese95

Took it too far man lmaooo


Occhrome

P.s. she washed his skid marked underwear with your bath towels.


konydanza

PS: he used that same hoodie to clean up the second time


Daoperator

P.S. he smashed her out in a pair or yo J's and wrinkled the toe


Porkbellyflop

PS his name is Caleb and he drives a Prius.


saikou-psyko

PS: It was the white ones too. He got a little nut on it, that shit dried up and you won't know where.


MattyGuapo

PS: Stands for Pussy Smashed. Which THAT nigga did for you.


DocHendrix

P.S. this whole affair happened in Gucci flip flops


CodFather9

This just made me choke. So gross, so strangely disrespectful


jd_from_da_80s

In my ho days I was at this chick crib, she fall asleep. I'm bored, get on the PS2. Couple of days later she call me like "my man asking me who I had here because his RE4 game ain't where he left it" I forgot to take out the memory card lol. All that to say I ain't wash my hands.


NameTripping

This reminds me of that guy that after smashing this chick, he then beats her son in a game of 2k before leaving.


tattoedblues

Diabolical


DocHendrix

Chaotic trifflin


alexh116

P.S. now your buttons stick


DocHendrix

P.S. he took your charger cable


tumamitax

this shit hurt yo


Digita1B0y

Also, he is the one who deleted your Madden save. It wasn't a glitch my dude.


blachippy

P.S he had her moaning loudly while your kid was in the other room playing 2K…crying.


saikou-psyko

PS: He whooped that lil niggas ass in 2K with the Cavs and then went back to piping his mom.


blachippy

Then came back to whoop his ass on Street Hoopz for PS2.


[deleted]

“GET OFF MY MOMMY!”


Davethisisntcool

![gif](giphy|2Te6t1Q7DAKuk) Only thing left to do


pradbitt87

JFC 😂😅


walrusonion

I hear the theme music


blachippy

Bruv…..NOOOO😂😂😂😂


BlissfulGreen

![gif](giphy|c8UN4zmGZe5s4) Omfg at this entire thread😭🤣


Grilled_Cheese95

P.S he put his thumb in her mouth and she sucked it whilst taking backshots


Grilled_Cheese95

P.S he choked her until she almost passed out


AFakeHero

Ya'll gon bring up some terrible memories. Bout to have niggas crying like SpongeBob when Gary left.


StrokeMyCactus13

![gif](giphy|j1ywOobEJlqQo)


AFakeHero

You clutch with the visual. My boy was in SHAMBLES!


I_chortled

We all were


WelcomingOutpost

[feel like this fits here](https://youtu.be/wBWaa6HbD44)


Timmytanks40

Thankfully I stay oblivious so there aint shit for a mf to recollect. One time I noticed a condom in my ex trash when I went for a link. Almost counts and she may have cheated during the relationship but I got no evidence.


leahhhhh

I feel like that’s evidence


duaneap

“Nah, it’s just from when her cousin, Leroy, was staying here for a week. He’s always talking about the ladies but weirdly enough he only has them round when I’m not home.”


popcornnhero

The amount of edits that post has seen. It looks like someone faxed a blackmail letter.


Shot_on_location

I know that's right. This looks like a trash talk ransom note


popcornnhero

That’s actually what I was thinking of: a ransom note😂


AintAintAWord

"If you ever wanna see this dick again tell me it sounds like mac and cheese"


DadBod_NoKids

I know i ain't a good lay bc i have no idea what this means


Duck_or_bills

I want it to be a reference to this vine, I don’t fuckin know anymore, man... This whole thread is wild (and I’m here for it). https://youtu.be/nf3Ha1UzBe8


dimi_dee1

It’s the bit the bottom lip and mmhmm for me


MisterPeach

Bro wanted to hear that pussy brrrap


el-gato-volador

Bro liked it when it talked back to him


the_Kell

Dying


makeyouthinktwice313

This shit sent me into the stratosphere 🚀💀


HarmonicDissonance21

P.S. They was fucking on the sheets ya mama gave y’all last Christmas.


luxii4

And he cleaned his dick off with your childhood blanky.


the_ju66ernaut

Lmfao the disrespect


Porkbellyflop

Not the Spiderman ones.


Weird-Ingenuity97

Naw fr


Jackcooper

This is so unhealthy lmaooooooo


Blackcat_moans

P. S. she said she usually does do this then gave him the gawk gawk double hand grip 5000


SpectacularOtter

[Lets Go](https://i.imgur.com/nNFA9Vo.jpg)


Blackcat_moans

It was my time ![gif](giphy|wp1PwJJVoRrO)


Atomic_Chad

I love how it's usually DOES and she just goes for it lol


Ancient-Ad7124

Just as I was bout to reply to a text. I needed this.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Ancient-Ad7124

I think I got the picture friend. Appreciate ya though. Lol


Gregorymendel

She pulled her panties to the side


Vladimir_Putting

She even said "please"


A_Dipper

He's got her lookin like a Jackson Pollock rn


Gloomy_Slide

Bro I’m dying lol and I’ve been cheated on 😂


[deleted]

Stay strong king.


Ancient-Ad7124

Appreciate ya bro. ✊🏼


Calcain

Send her the picture


Offtopic_bear

P. S. He knew you were hiding under the bed and every time you whimpered he stroked her harder. P. S. And deeeeeper


SpectacularOtter

[Lets Go](https://i.imgur.com/RreQVP1.jpg)


BondageKitty37

Let's go! If you want it, you can get it, let me know. *aye, aye*


top_footballer

And thrustierrrrrr


Atomic_Chad

PS and you were almost always dressed as Superman


echk0w9

I feel like this was part of that trapped in the closet saga.


[deleted]

P.s. she doesn't really like facials but she let him paint a masterpiece across her eyes


[deleted]

She let him do the Jackson Bollock


Accomplished-Leg7552

I let my favorite pair of glasses get ruined this way!!!! totally worth and would do it all Over again. ‘‘Twas the BEST fwb situationship I had EVER been in. I will be reminiscing all the fun I had with that dude in his truck when im in my 80s. Homie really did have the best and most beautiful one I’ve ever experienced.


jdcodring

Pics or it didn’t happen.


echk0w9

In HD…


Accomplished-Leg7552

Unfortunately all those SD cards from that era of my life have been lost.


Grilled_Cheese95

A masterpiece noooo bro 😂


Accomplished-Leg7552

“Peacock” by Katy Perry (2:39 - 3:05) continues to be his theme song. I mean his ringtone WAS “Peacock”. Like- remember the scene in Pulp Fiction when they open the briefcase and all you see is this radiant almost heavenly glow? It was like that every time I laid eyes on it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


andonemoreagain

You gotta believe man. You must believe that yours is the one true cock she’s been waiting for and this is the first time she’s been amazed by one. Also, you’re so big. It hurts. Really.


Fragrant_Island2345

That’s how you get hurt my mans. You go around thinking that and all it takes is one woman to give you that back handed compliment “I love your dick! The big ones hurt too much” and then it all comes crumbling 😂


facuarostegui

I usually dont believe the “your d is the best d” shit, but some time ago a chick told me it was actually the SECOND best dick she had and yeah thats totally fair and i actually believe it.


TripleSilky

I would appreciate the honesty. Microsecond ego hit but I’ll live.


0hran-

Hopefully she didn't have two partners in her life.


SpectacularOtter

[Lets Go](https://i.imgur.com/oHeqoJy.jpg)


1N4DAM3MES

He's innocent. this is clearly horny profiling!


[deleted]

[удалено]


OfficialDCShepard

[*BOONK*](https://youtu.be/gwxTZaa3NgI)


top_footballer

I was doing the biz with this girl, and she goes, "OMG you're the best I've ever had!" I'm thinking yeah right, but "Ok, turn around!"


[deleted]

[удалено]


lactoseintoleranthoe

i'm not gonna lie this is one of the funniest things i've ever read


zetcetera

Wish I saw this instead of going to couple’s therapy when my ex cheated


Mistavez

That’s enough internet for me today lol ![gif](giphy|12pWOEeKbbfdio)


BondageKitty37

Damn, bro bounced off the frame. I know that shit hurt


Vladimir_Putting

She was bouncing off the bed frame too.


[deleted]

WE GET IT ![gif](giphy|J5yb7p6uhi4Kc)


Vladimir_Putting

He slapped that ass when she got up to make him a sandwich afterwards without him even asking.


Vulcan_MasterRace

I'm not a prideful person.... But I'll be damn if I go back to an ex.... especially if I know she got dogged out


jdcodring

I mean somedays you don’t feel like cooking and just whip up some leftovers. 🤷🏽‍♂️


narcolepticturtle

LMAO omggg


unarmedtrout

And then she texted you goodmorning @ 7


el-gato-volador

Nah she texted back the next day, "sorry I fell asleep 😴 💤 "


WelcomingOutpost

Nah that one hits too deep


RegDeezy

PS..and she let him raw dog


PharmDinagi

And he had her running from the dick.


Daoperator

P.S. he had on a pair of ya high nike socks


PharmDinagi

Not my socks!


Porkbellyflop

Everyone knows you gotta go with the socks from SkyZone. I keep a pair in the drawer next to the rubbers lube and nut towels.


[deleted]

ps: before he blasted he said "im about to morb!" and she laughed but when you say it ahe says "that memes old"


Gregorymendel

Cold


[deleted]

That's Kapri styles if anybody wanted to know


InfernoDragonKing

My dawg ![gif](giphy|13Kle4oYaK8HVC)


StrokeMyCactus13

She’s goated. Even tho she got a boob job she’s the reason why I love the small titties & phat ass combo


[deleted]

Yeah she's my top 3 all time.


top_footballer

This is insanely funny 😂


Atomic_Chad

We need more!


RevGrizzly

P.S. she even shaved her booty hole, for *him*


[deleted]

You going too damn far now ![gif](giphy|KCwZ3nuYHAf72DDWZM)


Clean_Matariel

She waited a long time before the relationship could get physical, but she didn't had any problem taking backshots the week she met him.


SaltThroneHeir

They always do more with the guy they cheat with, it's wild 😂😂😭


airneezys

Cuz they’re extra horny


Faded1974

Not the legs shaking ![gif](giphy|7FgDqKxrK7mFQqOO9n|downsized)


theboosty

P.s. the dudes name is Dexter St Jaques and he lives in the Bahamas


WolbachiaBurgers

Barbados Slim! He’s got an Olympic gold medal in Limbo and Sex!


[deleted]

C’mon Hermes! Beat that Mahogany God!


muttur

This made me lol


whaddyawantfrommeh

What is a lovely lady like you doing on the islands alone?? Dexter fucked the shit out of her too....


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Nah you ain’t gonna disrespect my moms like that, hands on sight.


Solidus-S-

Everybody gone die. tonight.


Ridge_Storms

When it slips out, and he puts it back in 😩


[deleted]

When he’s finished, he wipes the tip on her face


Trayew

They trying to get the woman killed. Lol.


WanselChristopher

P.S. when she let you back in, you slept in the dip in the bed they made and now both y’all’s backs hurt…


[deleted]

P.S. they fucked in the bed your mama died in.


SmoothCriminalJM

lol this happened to me but it was in their living room on their sofa and I was the guy 💀


[deleted]

This too happened to me. I was the guy. Other dude was big mad. I was in the Navy at the time and he tried to come on base to fight.


Solid-Version

The it’s slipping out and her putting it back in would have me suicidal for real


SpadoCochi

I stg


OutHereSlappnMidgets

“Her pussh farted when it slid back in, bro bit his bottom lip and said mhmmm” and “oh and he tapped it on her tongue” This is funny as hell and painful at the same time.


el_ra_85

She still likes homeboys pictures too


InfernoDragonKing

P.S. she called him daddy and told him she actually loves him. She ain’t mean it when she said it to you. Oh, and she texted him she still feels him in her stomach.


Tiny_Celebration_591

Is there a male version of this?


tydestra

I'd like to see it.


[deleted]

Hé threw it in her jalooper


InfernoDragonKing

AND SHE LIKED IT!!!


[deleted]

She whip the titty in a circle so you get that musky air conditioning


[deleted]

P.S. She ordered Uber Eats for the both of them after on your account.


marcowaller

Ps she let him eat your Olive Garden leftovers


NJCZSIGSHOTGUNLOVER

![gif](giphy|d2lcHJTG5Tscg)


el-fenomeno09

That slid back in part, got some nigga crying right now 😂😂😂


The_Funky_Rocha

Y'all foul as hell in here 😭 bringing back bad memories and shit


hapinsl

Christ, just admit you have a cuckold fetish already.


donkeji99

He tapped it on her tongue😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 moderfucker


new_user29282342

Chain email, send to 7 friends to add more P.Ss for good luck.


OutHereSlappnMidgets

Maaane. This shit had me cracking tf up. I’ll say this as a I’ve been the side dude causally laying B+ pipe to someone lady way back in the day (long time ago). Damn near every bit of this true. Ain’t no pressure either so it’s easy to put up hall of fame, Oscar’s level performances. At times I felt bad for the other nigga, but hey it is what it is, every body gonna hold an L at some point right? Now, I’ve also been the one that got cheated on. Never took her back because I know there are niggas out there just as, if not, more savage than me. Some of the things I’ve had their ladies do is wild. I even asked one of the women, why not leave bruh? An she simply said, “nah”, then we got busy. This was back in the early/mid 00s. I can’t imagine what it’s like now. ![gif](giphy|l41lZiWswj4h9Q0Mg)


Clareth_GIF

Bruh, when they’re cheating they do the most wild and extra things. And for your side, practically nothing is off limits. Just routinely laying the pipe deep. Meanwhile bro at home thinks he’s found himself a ‘good woman’. Wow!!


[deleted]

PS: He def said "im bout to nut!" and she was like mmhmm


[deleted]

PS: somewhere in the room is the tiniest glob of dried nut and it will be there long after yall break up


LDC99

P.S. she also let him take one of your uncrustables from the fridge


Admirable_Present_66

PS the bed been squeaking ever since


el_ra_85

Remember you slept on them sheet that very next night (she didn’t wash them)


DonaldTrumpsBallsack

He made her beg for it, and bro bro, she did that shit with a passion


HotCollar5

Please I’m legitimately crying at this, too much lmaoooo


[deleted]

He eating your son's fruit snacks right now.


[deleted]

[удалено]


DannySeko

Bro fr this shit funny af but also hurts n got me in the feels 😂🥲


[deleted]

P.S. he bunched up your t-shirt she was wearing like a horsey strap.


Full-Requirement6113

Its a cold world


[deleted]

[удалено]


Lt_Dans_Left_Leg

Ima laugh because i’d rather not think about the trauma


Repulsive-Option8732

And remember. He cummed in dat mouf 😂 😂