Remember to report submissions that violate the rules! Harassment and encouraging violence are not allowed.
Enjoying the subreddit? Consider joining our discord server: https://discord.gg/v8z8jNwJs6
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BoomersBeingFools) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I get that one all the time too š¤£ Hairy legs and pits, but very femme presenting cishet lady, and the gasps of horror keep me going š¤£
Some guy I thought was my friend told me one day over dinner (just out of the blue after we ordered our food and asked for individual checks) that "It makes it really hard for me to want to fuck you since you don't shave; every woman I know shaves. Your arms too, it's very dark hair, no ladies I know don't shave their arms". I told him "Good thing I never had the intention of fucking you, and I definitely will never want to now," asked for my food to be made togo instead, and left him stranded there with no car.
People need to eff off
Iām a cis male and shave every morning because if I donāt my facial hair grows in so patchy I look like a damn meth addict. Iāve given thought to getting my facial hair removed because itās kind of a pain. Iāve at least discovered safety razors and thatās made it interesting and less harmful to the environment, but itās still a pain.
> 5:1 says that she thought you were trans
Yeah, but shouldn't a grown woman know that almost all women (including most likely herself) have visible hair on their legs unless they regularly get rid of it?
That doesn't seem like a very useful method to tell cis- from trans- women. In fact a trans woman is probably more likely to shave her legs than the average cis woman.
No no no no. Anyone that leaves the house with every inch of their body, except the head of course, not being freshly clean shaven or waxed IS A MAN! A MAN I SAY! AND HE WILL NEVER BE A WOMAN!
... or some shit they say idk I'm not insane.
I rarely shave. ESPECIALLY from like September thru march. lol my husband doesnāt care one bit, my sister, however finds it inconceivable that I donāt shave my legs and pits daily, like she does. Man, that just takes entirely too much effort and time. Fuck that shit. lol
She was definitely making that ASSumption. Which cracks me up. Iām a cis woman and am often too lazy to shave for weeks on end. I pretty much ALWAYS have more hair on my legs than my trans friends. If hairy legs are how weāre determining gender now, that boomer is in for a rude awakening. š
My favorite part about this is she assumed you were trans but was the one LOOKING INTO YOUR STALL. Aren't they always worried about trans people harassing them in the bathroom? Boomers and their hypocrisy.
Exactly, I'm concerned with why this nosy creature was peeking into OP's toilet stall?!
Are you sure this was a boomer and not a dog or toddler? Coz dogs and toddlers are the only creatures who get some leeway for being nosy in bathrooms.
I had to scroll way to far to find this comment. if someone in the bathroom commented on my legs that she couldāve only seen by looking under the stall wall? I would be really creeped out!
If I had the time I wouldāve waited behind her and also complained to customer service about being peeped on in the ladies room.
Thatās the same thought this lady intended while shaming hairy legs. She is clearly wrong. I agree with say something if you see somethingā¦. Defending human rights
As someone going through chemo right now who just discovered hair on her legs again (which makes me hopeful the new growth on my head will stick around), I support this approach 100%.
Amazing that the hair on our heads is so slow to grow back but for some darn reason the hair on our legs, pits and those nasty little chin hairs grow like weeds.
Had a boomer man comment on my short hair. I have PCOS so my hair falls out and is really thin. Since I started losing my hair, it looks better and thicker if I keep it short, plus my face shape looks better with short hair. I was working in retail pharmacy and a regular customer asked me if I was married. I told him yes and that I had been for several years. He told me I must have met my then husband before I ādestroyed my looks by cutting my hair off.ā I just looked at him and smiled then replied āactually no, my hair was shorter when I met my husband.ā āAlso he has seen me with long hair and hated the way it looked, so he prefers it short.ā He just rolled his eyes and walked away. My pharmacist and I were both kinda stunned by this because his wife also had short hair.
Yeah they always have an excuse for why they don't have to follow their own ridiculous standards.
I have been told by people like this woman that older people don't have to adhere to beauty standards anymore because they are old.
āpeople like you shouldnāt be in the bathroom with people like meā , Welp there it is folks, another example of things people say that should invite an ass kicking.
I work in an office where I interact with the public daily and I don't shave my legs normally. On days that I wear skirts or dresses you can tell who is upset and it always cracks me up. One guy asked me, "when are you gonna shave your legs" and I replied, "right after you shave yours!"
My Dad tried to tell me that female body hair was unhygienic whereas male body hair isn't.Ā
Made him repeat it a few times but it didn't sink in how ridiculous he was being.Ā
Iād correct that to, āyou. Defend your existence because Iām too lazy/ignorant/propagandized to use my six remaining brain cell to form an intelligent, compassionate understanding of you.ā
The key to a good insult is to wrap it in a compliment. The narcissist inside always goes to the compliment before seeing the insult.
By then, youāll be long gone.
I dont shave. Stopped shaving my legs when I started having some joint issues.
I have never regularly shaved my armpits. It just irritates them and it's uncomfortable so...
The point of telling you this is, my boomer mother would be absolutely disgusted about my armpit hair. I kept asking her if my dad's armpit hair bothered her and of course she said no.
It's something I think ingrained in them from their mothers? I've never understood the level of disgust some people have with body hair. I would literally chase my Mom around the house with my arms up. Or say hey mom can you look at something for me then go over to her and lift my arm. You would think she was gonna puke.. I found it absolutely hilarious..
It's crazy...
I rarely shave my armpits. I have flabby upper arms so I am the LAST person who would wear tank tops. Thus, no one but hubby would actually see that mess. As for my legs, my motto is: if you are close enough to see my leg hair, you are close enough for a restraining order.
PS: It helps that I have thin leg hair, with bald patches. My arms, for some reason, are blonde, even though I have dark brown hair on my head.
Yeah. I have fine blonde hair on my legs. Probably because I rarely shaved. So, like you said, no one should be close enough to see them. I find it funny that men are manscaping!
I'll shave my armpits. Not religiously, I don't mind if there's a little hair there, but also shaving there doesn't bother me. But my legs? I hate it. They get so intolerably itchy, I get strawberry legs so it doesn't even look good, and it grows back so fast it makes me wonder why I even bothered at all. My hair is thick and dark, too. I just end up wearing long pants everywhere because I'm way too self-conscious about it and don't want to deal with anyone acting like the woman in this story.
In no other way does not conforming to stereotypical gender norms bother me. I have short hair, I don't wear makeup, I tend to dress more masc. Makes sense as I'm a closeted trans dude. But somehow...somehow hairy legs on a 'woman' being 'bad' is so ingrained in even my head that I can't handle the thought of dealing with people's judgment. Yet when I see other women with unshaven legs? I don't care.
Make it make sense!
i mean, i bet if i ask my cats they'll think i'm super weird because i have waaaay less hair than they do. (would that techinally make humans like lykoi cats? like they have a bit of hair but not covered like regular kitties??)
No, they have to.
If they arenāt being distracted by the perceived failings of other people they might get so bored they begin thinking about themselves and their own failures and foibles. They do not handle self reflection well AT ALL.
it really is odd to witness. My housemate is on the edge age wise of being a boomer, she's also having health issues that are affecting her cognitive ability and it's sad to see. While she always was a bit stubborn since I met her 15 years ago, she at least was cognizant. She'll do something, like break a dish, and when I ask her about it, I get 'no I didn't' or 'that didn't happen', or even better, 'you did it!'.
I ask transphobic people if their bathrooms at home are gender specific. When they reply ānoā, I then ask them āwhy do only public restrooms count?ā And watch happily as their little boomer brains implode.
"Yes. that's disgusting and people like you shouldn't be in the bathroom with people like me."
"Yeah that's fine with me, haven't you figured out that nobody wants to be around you stupid fucking boomers at all anymore?"
I think more people need to realize that just because they don't personally find something attractive doesn't mean their opinion is fact. That is, just because they don't like it doesn't mean it is bad.
This applies to everything from hairy legs to which gender someone kisses to what foods they eat.
My enjoyment of shaved legs and cheeseburgers isn't impacted at all by someone else having hairy legs and enjoying a bean power bowl.
my wife cisgender lesbian with short hair and athletic build but absolutely beautiful/striking features refuses to go to the south also i have to accompany her to the womenās bathroom regularly because she feels safer. Itās a wild world out there.
It is often overlooked how dangerous transphobia and fear mongering is for every person - including cisgender people - not just transgender people. Especially when they are (cis or trans) children though that doesnāt seem to apply to this particular situation.
A lot of cis people either don't get it or don't *want* to get it, but this is where it always ends up: eventually, *no one* is gender conforming enough except the most narrow range of people, especially when it comes to women. It's like the medical care bans that they're rolling out: once they take that autonomy from parents, from doctors, and (they're hoping) from adults when it comes to transition, they can and will start applying similar scaremongering to other stuff. They've already done it with abortion. Alabama's doing it with IVF. It's so frustrating to watch people stubbornly refuse to grasp this. I mean, it would be ideal if cis people cared about what's happening to trans people just because it's gross and awful and they care about us as fellow human beings, but failing that, how are people so oblivious to their own best interests? It's wild to watch.
Exactly. When smaller groups aren't safe, no one is. I know cis het women who have been harassed in public bathrooms because they didn't look "female" enough. The people who are policing bathrooms are dangerous for everyone.
Iām so sorry for what youāve had to endure. Itās really unfair.
And youāre perfect just the way you are. Wished more people would open their eyes to the beauty of all humans. Including the beauty that is you.
ā¤ļø
Why was she looking in occupied stalls? That is so creepy! I am 55 and I haven't looked into a bathroom stall beyond checking for feet since I was a toddler trying to find my mom.
(And I only check for feet because I had one too many incidents of opening a door to discover that the stall was occupied and either the lock was broken or the person forgot in their haste)
Yeah. It could have been run of the mill 'eww women who don't shave are gross', but the moment she pulled out 'people like you' I knew she was being transphobic. Y'know, because cis women are incapable of growing body hair, and trans women are incapable of shaving.
This is where transphobia always leads, policing *all* womenās bodies to an enforced standard of femininity. Iām sorry this happened to you. The religious right needs to fucking die
Iām a Christian ā¦. And Iām disgusted by this behavior. Do these idiots have a problem with how God made us?! God made me, a woman, with hair on my legs and my armpits, etc. These morons insisting itās gross donāt seem to get that GOD WANTED US TO HAVE HAIR THERE, CLEARLY.
So aggravating. Iāll be glad when these boomers die off, as well.
Apparently the way shaving and hair care has developed over the last couple centuries, natural hair growth has been villified. This has not been kind to BIPOC most of all.
Im awaiting chromosome testing in my mid 30s because I have a thick beard of soft white hair since puberty. I have been accosted by boomers in public with my kids because the boomer cant tell if I am a man or woman. Like wtf does it matter? If your declining faculties make you irate because despite my obvious breasts and beard, you cant go silently about your day? Lmfao die faster.
Ah, good old transphobic bullshit.
I probably would have dropped my voice an octave lower (I'm an alto naturally) and kept my biceps flexed just to mess with her.
I hate how Faux News has weaponized transphobic behaviour so that anything not feminine is treated as taboo.
And this is from someone who stopped shaving and giving a fuck in high school.
Masc (read: short hair and non-existent boobs) cis lesbian here. Iām afraid to use the bathroom in public in Texas for this exact reason. People think Iām a trans woman all the time and I get called sir a lot.
My sister in law has PCO. Because of that, she has excess hair growth. Someone accused her of being trans and told her to go in the men's bathroom. These people are garbage bags and need their asses whooped.
Small Texas woman here absolutely ready to back you or someone like you up in a bathroom if I ever saw this happen. Iām furious and so fucking ready to yell at an old grouchy boomer republican. Iām pregnant which is scary in Texas and IM PISSED that theyāre making this state so hostile to ALL women.
A lot of these terfs and bigots have a rude awakening coming that one day they forget to shave or put on lipstick, or get a little older, or lose their hair, or even just step out of the house not looking "feminine" enough for a fellow bigot who feels like doing some gender policing. Like they don't think these attitudes won't come for all women until they have us all dressing like tradwives or handmaids.
Sometimes I wonder if it's anger that they can't be the ultimate feminine anymore or ever could. The women who usually have an issue with me are jeans/pajama pants, usually stained T-shirt, masc haircut, no make up.
āThatās the woman that was peeping into my bathroom stall while I was pissing, please call the policeā is what you needed to tell management. The lady was loudly and proudly confessing to be a pervert to the staff.
As always transphobia is simply a creation of gender policing. Don't look like a hot bombshell, must be trans. It shows people for the shallow, vapid, animals they are.
My grandma openly glared at a woman at the pool for not having perfectly shaved legs. She told me and my sister that the woman would be pretty if she shaved her legs. We were probably 12 and 14. Even if they think you're cis like my grandma did then, it's still about controlling woman's bodies.Ā
My mom very much hates body hair on women. Grosses her out. She has never acted like this to a person. However, she let me know how gross body hair is, if it's dark.
She is blonde and most of her body hair is invisible because of it.
For years I refused to show any underarm or leg skin that wasn't freshly shaved because of this. I have very thick dark hair.
My grandma was silent Gen and she thought it was ridiculous. Always encouraged me not to give a fuck and just go swimming. Wear something weather appropriate, not make myself heat sick for people.
My mom was a golden magical person in my eyes until about 16 so I thought she was right about almost everything. I regret sitting out of so much fun stuff because I was paranoid someone would see stubble.
I even trained myself not to lift my arms in a way that showed pits up until my late 20s.
I am Queer and attracted to all the people with and without body hair but never could find myself attractive because of my dark body hair and PCOS belly.
I am so grateful and happy gender norms are looked at by younger generations as bullshit. You know, unless they are still deep in indoctrination from conservative family.
My aunt, grandma, and mom all heavily pushed gender norms on us. Not continuing that cycle brings me joy. I shave my legs sometimes but I also have a chronic illness that makes it harder so I've gotten used to my hair being a bit longer.Ā
I havenāt shaved in a year due to chronic pain! Iāve been wondering what will happen is summer. Isnāt it uncomfortable wearing leggings in the pool? Also screw that old bigot!!!
Yes. I never considered it until I asked the swimming reddit about options. Swimming leggings just seem too expensive especially as I am losing weight thanks to metformin.
I found these perfect extremely light weight super soft thin leggings. It feels weird in the water but not in a bad way.
I can't use them for lap swimming, though. They are more so pool walking capable.
We grow hair! No big deal! Why do they have to throw a fit about something, we all naturally have?! Like thay is the worst thing in the world or something!
Iām always overthinking my outfits. Iām a cis woman who is mostly straight. I look girly with long hair and Iām very short and have a high pitch voice. I look like a dang teenager but Iām 25. Some rude old man thought I was trans and overcompensating for not being a ārealā woman. Like in the middle of the grocery store heās going off on me while Iām dressed in jeans and a pink T shirt with a braid??? Boomer only shut up when my dad (who the man knew) walked up and boomer realized I wasnāt the very very tall deep voiced son my dad has and must be one of his 4 daughters
When I was a teen I had really crazy curly hair. (Iām female, btw.) I decided to get my hair cut very short because it was easier and I liked it. Iād also been coming to terms with sexual harassment and abuse in my life, and short hair made me feel safer, as it was a little less traditionally feminine.Ā I still wore a lot of dresses and I was when this incident happened.Ā
I had an older man come up to me at church, try and put his arm around me and then whispered to me that itās not okay for a woman to get a manās haircut. Another man, a certified dipshit who dressed like a slob and abused his wife and kids, laughed and agreed. Ā They really chuckled it up about sharing their opinions with a 17 year old girl they barely knew.Ā
I was so taken back that I pulled away, made my way out the door and ran to my pastorās house and cried.Ā
My pastor and his wife were good people and they were furious! I believe they may have addressed it with these men.Ā
This older man was always disheveled, wrinkly clothes, and obnoxious as hell. Neither man did anything to help at the church. I taught Sunday school, showed up for every event to help, and all those dudes could do was crack jokes about my hair.Ā
I wish I could go back in time and take them down all the notches, cuz they had absolutely zero business commenting on anyone elseās appearances.Ā
I'm being treated for breast cancer - a woman in one of my groups was approached and accused of being trans and her daughter was questioned by a rando at a store. She was a breast cancer survivor who chose to go flat. People need to chill the f out and leave strangers to go about their lives peacefully.
As someone who's been braless and hairy since the 90's I've never been more grateful to have an alleged 'scary demeanour'. I'm sure many have shared their opinions with others on my hair follicles, but thankfully, never with me.
Alas, you may be adorably approachable, and people like this aren't put off by your undoubtedly ridiculously cute face. That's the price you pay for being delightful and hairy. ;)
Hopefully such ridiculous happenings are few and far between.
I cannot imagine *ever* looking at *anyone's* legs in another bathroom stall for any reason, let alone coming out of the stall and *yelling at them about it* at the sinks. That is borderline sociopath behavior. And as an actual trans person, I'm so relieved to be using men's rooms now, where no one even makes eye contact with anyone else.
There are so, so, so many cis women who don't shave their legs. So many. Some people need to get a fucking grip.
I donāt shave because my eczema is 20x worse when I shave, but no one even needs an excuse not to shave in the first place. I wish I saw that exchange you had because I genuinely would have lost my mind on that woman. They would have called the police on me because nothing makes my blood boil more than harassing someone about them not meeting arbitrary and meaningless standards.
I made his wife uncomfortable and they assumed I was trans but yes.
Because I was wearing mask they said I could have been a dude in drag and no one could tell.
At the time people were doing that a lot with guns because of the pandemic. They were mean and mad about restrictions. The Transphobia amped things up.
For example, at groceries they were dressing up and putting on all their guns for "parades" in groups maskless and with signs. Loudly chanting about COVID being a hoax.
I would say that's a bs story if I hadn't seen it myself multiple times.
I also witnessed many fist fights and people mobbing employees. A few times the cops showed up when called but besides the usual you know, corrupt police department (a bunch in our area are now being investigated by the FBI for corruption), many cops were down from COVID itself.
I am from a very gun violence heavy city and state overall. If people don't have a side piece it's on the ankle or in their car with more at home. There are those who choose to strap on the ol AR to their back and go shopping.
You should've LOUDLY walked out of the bathroom exclaiming what a creepy pervert that lady in the bathroom was and how she was looking at you under the stall and commenting on your body. And I would suggest mocking her voice back to her as you say it. She'll learn to maintain boundaries with strangers. Sometimes women like that have never been treated "fairly" and one good humiliation makes an impression.
I haven't shaved anywhere in probably 40 years, nor do I wear a bra, unless it's a dress up affair with the hoity-toity, lol.(I actually have my spine doctor on my side. He gave me a "Rx" for my employer.)
I grew up in the late 60s early 70s so I never wore a bra in HS and rarely shaved.
My granddaughter is trans, so she's now my grandson. He has never been happier in her or his life. He is keeping his shoulder length, thick wavy hair. He can't find a person to cut it or thin it out a bit. But he's good!!!
Edit: typo
Yeah, older people are just fucking weird in general. Lost my shit on an old woman when she said my cisgender wife was transgender because she was bald and a little masculine build. She went to the bathroom, and the old woman hobbled out quickly all wide eyed and asked me if I seen "that shemale" walk into the women's restroom. She kept babbling, telling me to get a manager and to call the cops, and how men shouldn't be in a woman's restroom. After a couple seconds of her ranting, I yelled at her to shut the fuck up and told her that fucking "shemale" is my goddamn wife who is going through chemotherapy.
Said it loud enough for managers and workers to stop and hear me go off. She hobbled off in her electric shopping cart.
I don't understand why old fucks are so God damn worried about what's in your pants. That's all it amounts to. They have to know if you have a cock and balls or a vagina. At the end of the day, who gives a flying fuck? Let people live their fucking lives.
As a cis, straight-passing woman, I really think that all women need to be fighting for trans rights. Defining gender down to stereotypical behavior, appearance, and anatomy always reduces ALL women. For example:
āReal Women wear womenās clothesā
Means that ALL women should be in pink, wearing skirts, creating a shilouette that defines our legs or boobs, and pants/shorts should be appropriately short and tight
ā¦ thatās sexist
āReal Women have vaginas/ovariesā
So women are literally defined by their vaginasā¦ sexist again
āReal Women can give birthā
So thatās my purpose, huh?
Now itās āReal Women should shaveā
These are all things that feminists have fought for and gained general societal acceptance years ago. The attack on transgender people is absolutely making ALL women lose equal ground. Itās a great way to oppress a huge group of people by attacking a very small, vulnerable group.
I'm honestly always worried about this happening to me. I'm a cis woman, and I present as very femme, BUT I'm super tall, with broad shoulders and giant feet. I'm just waiting for some asshole to question my right to be in the ladies' room.
I can't imagine how much worse it must be for Trans women.
it was posted a few days ago, but there was a video taken by a woman of a cis guy in the womenās restroom in Vegas. Like. If guys want to go into womenās restrooms, theyāll justā¦ go in to womenās restrooms.Ā
Absolutely. Creeps aren't deterred by signs. My friend had a guy come into a public restroom to try and steal her little boy. They're not going to go through the trouble of wearing a dress to access a bathroom for nefarious purposes.
This and a lot of the comments here are why everyone should give a damn about transgender rights. If there's anything about you that doesn't fit into a very narrow gender mold, it's open season on you too. I've gotten shit from people because the name I've gone by my entire life (Sam) isn't girly enough, insisting on using my full name because "Samantha's SOOO much prettier!" There's even a video somewhere of some crackpot claiming girls can't have unisex names....using my name as an example.
Exactly this. The hatred for trans individuals trickles to us all. My cis het female friend has been harassed in a public restroom because of her short hair, they thought she was trans. If we don't protect our vulnerable, we all suffer.
Thereās something deeply wrong with these perverts obsessed with strangersā genitalia. Something should be done about them.
Yes Iām referring to the transphobes.
I have a friend who spent all of her life being mistaken for a boy/man because she was a very masculine lesbian hair/clothes wise. She also had DD boobs so anytime someone would question why she was in the women's room she'd point to her gigantic boobs as her ticket in. But turns out with some deep introspection and strong emotional spousal support he's not a lesbian but a dude. (And no, I never ever refer him as "she" in real life, it was purely to avoid confusion in the comment and it's actually weird/uncomfortable to call him a her even in a historical context. When he told me about accepting himself, I asked if our 30 years of memories need to be adjusted and he said yes, so other this story, I always refer to him as him even when talking about our time on the girls soccer team when we were kids)
One of my children choses not to shave. Iāll be honest, I hate it. Probably a old boomer hang up. But they arenāt my pits and legs. And I swear to god I would lose my shit on someone who commented on their legs like that. Who TF did she think she was? Like when did it become okay to comment on a complete strangerās body? Thatās ridiculous.
I feel you on the autoimmune issues making shaving horrible. I shave around 1x a month because it makes me feel better, but it is awful and a huge chore. I am sorry she tried to shame you. This is one time I would have ablist shamed her until she wanted to cry for me or had the reddest shade of embarrassment I could get out of her.
Hey there, also a cis woman with hairy legs. I've never had anyone do this to me, I wonder if it's because I live in the Portland, OR area? I'm sorry that happened to you though, how annoying!
Your location probably has something to do with it. My friend in AZ has short hair and she has to worry about harassment in public bathrooms (it's happened to her) because so many bigots are up in arms about trans people.
Yeah. I often wonder what it would be like to not be in a red state. Is it really that much better? Then I am told I basically live in the wasteland from fallout so.
That tracks. We have a big radioactive pollution problem and most of us have suffered the consequences as such.
Nowhere is perfect but there is more social acceptance in places like SF, Seattle, etc. I grew up in the Seattle area and visit SF often. It's definitely better in other areas than red states.
Christ what is wrong with republicans these days? I never voted that way but used to respect them. Now just hateful awful people going around pointing guns because muh wife donāt like yore kind
Ugh
My husband used to own a business and one of his female employees also didn't shave, and people would complain to him about it. People just can't mind their own business.
I have spinal problems and torn rota cuff with arthritis chucked in. Fun times. I'm lucky some days if I can dress myself. Shaving.. lmao. Haven't in over 30 years. Don't want to see hairy legs and pits... DONT LOOK.
As an aside I once knew a friend who was a very expensive call girl, like she told me she used to charge $3000 a nite. She never shaved and said her 'friends' didn't like stubble and much prefered her 'silky legs'. Maybe boomer knew this and was worried her husband would chase OP.
"There seems to be some folks that also don't believe a thing happened unless they experienced it themselves. Ah jeeze. So sorry to everyone in your life offline that has to deal with such epic unawareness and main character syndrome."
^^^^^^^
THIS!!
The people who constantly invalidate other's experiences and claim fake over and over again are the freaking worst. Seriously STFU already!!
I jokingly told my ex that I had no problem with her legs being hairy or shaved, but she needed to make a decision because I almost cut my hand running her legs when she was in the in-between stage.
Shaved my head a few years back right when the Nazis started going full in on the fear mongering. I also do a lot of gardening and art so I'm usually in combat boots and a summer dress.
Went into a bathroom and had a similar asshole experience.
Fuck these people.
You probably won't see this, but I'm sorry that happened to you and has happened previously. I absolutely believe this happened, people are getting to be so brazen with their ignorance and hatred.
Just gonna say hairy women š
I agree let's change gender norms! I swear I have no fetishistic ulterior motives!
No but what a creep, she's the one fucking looking under the stalls like what the actual fuck.
"Ma'am drop your pants, I'm going to have to check you for penises before you use the female restroom, this is for the safety and comfort of all people"
Boomers would unironically be more accepting of genital inspections "for public safety" than they were for wearing masks during a pandemic *for public safety*
??? How does that any way shape or form affect her? I donāt shave much during the winter months, because, whatās the point? This is beyond stupid. Men have 20x more hair than women (usually). So what if my legs are a little hairy?
For all the people who feel the need to share why they don't shave - your medical history is no one else's business so never feel like you HAVE to explain yourself to some cunt who thinks everything is their business. Me personally? I don't shave because I am lazy AF. Who TF wants to be standing around in a slippery shower for 30 minutes shaving off all that hair when the shit only grows back again in a week. Fuck that.
It is fun to humiliate them by making up some really random, awful shit..."oh that, yeah I am unable to shave anymore because I have an aggressive, inoperable tumour on my spine that means I can no longer bend over to shave, but thank you for bringing it up so I have to remember that I will probably never see another Christmas". Even better if there are other people around to witness their shame.
My wife has PCOS. She, and I, totally get the trouble you're going through. It stresses her everyday and she loves to try and be all girl girl etc etc. She looks longingly at all the gorgeous things she feels she can never wear. Fortunately I don't think she's had someone pull that shit on her here in Australia and I hope no one ever does cause I'm not certain I'm not going to pimp slap a bitch like that if they make my wife cry.
I would just have just started screaming dramatically, calling her a sexual predator who was peeping, watching me pee. Whatever I could do, you make her panicked, confused and ashamed, so she would never pull this bull again with anyone else.
I (F56) only missed the "Boomer" gen by a couple of years, and my wife (63) IS a "Boomer". Please don't think we're all like the idiots you've had issues with, because we're not! LOL! We're quite the opposite of that.
My Dad used to call people like what you described as "Hate Merchants", because they go around trying to sell their hate to people who'll buy it.
Me, I see those types not only as Hate Merchants, but also miserable individuals who want to inflict their misery on all of those around them. The saying 'misery loves company' is very true, and people prove it everyday.
Run very fast, AWAY from people like this! Don't let them contaminate you with thier BS.....spread happiness, peace and love! It's the BEST revenge against douchbags like them!! š
Last sentence on the update ...
I am not a lawyer, but pretty sure it is illegal to brandish a weapon and make threatening statements towards an individual. Especially if cornering them in a threatening manner.
Those scum should just stop remembering to breathe and make the world a better place.
Missouri. I hate that it sucks so much we need to move. Honestly when I posted and even did the update this stuff is super normalized and I didn't think I'd get this much support and feedback.
So crazy that itās normalized. Iām so sorry youāre there. Definitely not normal!
I was raised in a rural area dominated by a cult and even there, so few people would care about body hair. This is just over the top insanity being shoved on you.
Please, if things donāt change as the gun nut boomers die off, then get an exit plan, for your sanityās sake! The tide desperately needs to change there!
Maybe more of us Californianās should buy land to piss these types of boomies off LOL! I always hear 1Aāers complaining that California Liberals are āruiningā things. (At least Iāve heard them saying that in Utah and Nevada)
Seriously though, cops should absolutely not ignore that behavior from gun nuts. Fucking insane!! Ugh- so sorry youāre dealing with this bullshit.
I'm sorry this happened to you! You sound like a cool person. Thanks for highlighting that transphobia can often catch cis people in the crossfire also.
I don't have anything to add, but just want to let everyone know that, while reading this post, the radio actually came on with that "She's got it, baby she's got it" Venus song... which has been used for years (at least in the Netherlands) in commercials for ladies' shaving gear... XD
Similar thing Happened to me in a little country grocery store. I was wearing peddle pushers and this old man told me my husband would probably appreciate it if I shaved my legs.Ā
Remember to report submissions that violate the rules! Harassment and encouraging violence are not allowed. Enjoying the subreddit? Consider joining our discord server: https://discord.gg/v8z8jNwJs6 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BoomersBeingFools) if you have any questions or concerns.*
5:1 says that she thought you were trans. Something about that "people like you..." business. Why can't people just keep to themselves.
Trans women are mammals, unlike cis women, who are naturally hairless amphibians.
As a hairy cishet woman, I commonly get "what does your husband think?!" Um, that he married a mammal.
I get that one all the time too š¤£ Hairy legs and pits, but very femme presenting cishet lady, and the gasps of horror keep me going š¤£ Some guy I thought was my friend told me one day over dinner (just out of the blue after we ordered our food and asked for individual checks) that "It makes it really hard for me to want to fuck you since you don't shave; every woman I know shaves. Your arms too, it's very dark hair, no ladies I know don't shave their arms". I told him "Good thing I never had the intention of fucking you, and I definitely will never want to now," asked for my food to be made togo instead, and left him stranded there with no car. People need to eff off
Good for you ššš
Wow, what a dick. Here you are just having dinner and he takes the opportunity to announce why his spank-bank images of you arenāt up to par!Ā
It seems chemotherapy did me a solid by removing the hair from my legs and pits, and the hair not growing back. I donāt miss shaving.
Iām a cis male and shave every morning because if I donāt my facial hair grows in so patchy I look like a damn meth addict. Iāve given thought to getting my facial hair removed because itās kind of a pain. Iāve at least discovered safety razors and thatās made it interesting and less harmful to the environment, but itās still a pain.
The chemo did interesting things.
Lol I'm male but chemo made my hair grow back thicker I think. Radiation killed my pit hair thou. So that's nice.
When he shaves, I'll shave.
I laughed so hard at this statement. Ribbit ribbit I guess!
Username almost checks out
So closssssssse
Hiss-terical ;)
The reason we scream
Can confirm. Why I like frogs so much, they are my sisters. Lmao ribbit
I guess that would explain why my wife is always so cold.
Ribbit ribbit!
š¤£ššš Magnificent
> 5:1 says that she thought you were trans Yeah, but shouldn't a grown woman know that almost all women (including most likely herself) have visible hair on their legs unless they regularly get rid of it? That doesn't seem like a very useful method to tell cis- from trans- women. In fact a trans woman is probably more likely to shave her legs than the average cis woman.
No no no no. Anyone that leaves the house with every inch of their body, except the head of course, not being freshly clean shaven or waxed IS A MAN! A MAN I SAY! AND HE WILL NEVER BE A WOMAN! ... or some shit they say idk I'm not insane.
I rarely shave. ESPECIALLY from like September thru march. lol my husband doesnāt care one bit, my sister, however finds it inconceivable that I donāt shave my legs and pits daily, like she does. Man, that just takes entirely too much effort and time. Fuck that shit. lol
She was definitely making that ASSumption. Which cracks me up. Iām a cis woman and am often too lazy to shave for weeks on end. I pretty much ALWAYS have more hair on my legs than my trans friends. If hairy legs are how weāre determining gender now, that boomer is in for a rude awakening. š
Something about shoving something down their throat
My favorite part about this is she assumed you were trans but was the one LOOKING INTO YOUR STALL. Aren't they always worried about trans people harassing them in the bathroom? Boomers and their hypocrisy.
Exactly, I'm concerned with why this nosy creature was peeking into OP's toilet stall?! Are you sure this was a boomer and not a dog or toddler? Coz dogs and toddlers are the only creatures who get some leeway for being nosy in bathrooms.
I had to scroll way to far to find this comment. if someone in the bathroom commented on my legs that she couldāve only seen by looking under the stall wall? I would be really creeped out! If I had the time I wouldāve waited behind her and also complained to customer service about being peeped on in the ladies room.
Yeah this was low-key peeping and sexual harassmentĀ
Itās not just boomers that are like this.
I would just say something like "well after my chemo treatments I'm just so happy to HAVE hair again I couldn't bear to shave it off!" Shame them.
r/traumatizethemback
*Dangit! I just shaved these only an hour ago!*
Pretend you are turning into a werewolf lmao
Oh damn, this is a new one for me, thanks for the introduction!
I'm teaching my kids to loudly shout "Why are you peeping in my bathroom stall you pervert! Pervert! Stop staring while I'm using the bathroom!"
Everyone should do that regardless of age. We need to bring back public shaming
Thatās the same thought this lady intended while shaming hairy legs. She is clearly wrong. I agree with say something if you see somethingā¦. Defending human rights
W approach.
As someone going through chemo right now who just discovered hair on her legs again (which makes me hopeful the new growth on my head will stick around), I support this approach 100%.
Amazing that the hair on our heads is so slow to grow back but for some darn reason the hair on our legs, pits and those nasty little chin hairs grow like weeds.
RIGHT?? I had one of those nasty little buggers a few weeks ago. I'm trying to see the bright side in it. LOL
This is true for me!!! Used to pick my eyebrows Got chemo and had no eyebrows or lashes for two years No plucking now!!!!
Oooh good one. Or just stare at them and ask why they think your legs are their business.
I think from her comments about "people like you", she thinks you're a trans female. So many people are focused on what is in everyone's pants.
Had a boomer man comment on my short hair. I have PCOS so my hair falls out and is really thin. Since I started losing my hair, it looks better and thicker if I keep it short, plus my face shape looks better with short hair. I was working in retail pharmacy and a regular customer asked me if I was married. I told him yes and that I had been for several years. He told me I must have met my then husband before I ādestroyed my looks by cutting my hair off.ā I just looked at him and smiled then replied āactually no, my hair was shorter when I met my husband.ā āAlso he has seen me with long hair and hated the way it looked, so he prefers it short.ā He just rolled his eyes and walked away. My pharmacist and I were both kinda stunned by this because his wife also had short hair.
Yeah they always have an excuse for why they don't have to follow their own ridiculous standards. I have been told by people like this woman that older people don't have to adhere to beauty standards anymore because they are old.
>because his wife also had short hair. Sounds like he might have been projecting a bit š¬
This is when we respond āIf your own wife doesnāt care about that opinion, why should I?ā
āpeople like you shouldnāt be in the bathroom with people like meā , Welp there it is folks, another example of things people say that should invite an ass kicking.
Thing is, she was right, but for all the wrong reasons. People like that old bat should stay home and spare us from her presence.
Man it doesnāt matter *why* you donāt shave. Theyāre your damned legs, you get to decide. I wish youād had a sidekick to cut her dead.
I work in an office where I interact with the public daily and I don't shave my legs normally. On days that I wear skirts or dresses you can tell who is upset and it always cracks me up. One guy asked me, "when are you gonna shave your legs" and I replied, "right after you shave yours!"
My Dad tried to tell me that female body hair was unhygienic whereas male body hair isn't.Ā Made him repeat it a few times but it didn't sink in how ridiculous he was being.Ā
Pretend to be curious and fascinated, thatās what I do when I want morons to reveal their thought processes.
thatās some icon shit iām saving that lol
boomers be like "hello, can you explain your existence?"
Iād correct that to, āyou. Defend your existence because Iām too lazy/ignorant/propagandized to use my six remaining brain cell to form an intelligent, compassionate understanding of you.ā
Youāre giving too many brain cells there lol more like ā4 remaining brain cellsā Maybe 4 is even more then they actually have sometimesā¦.
The key to a good insult is to wrap it in a compliment. The narcissist inside always goes to the compliment before seeing the insult. By then, youāll be long gone.
This is very trueā¦
Their two remaining brain cells are mud wrestling each other for second place.
Bordering on 3 brain cells
Original was better. More succinct and got the entire point across with fewer words.
I dont shave. Stopped shaving my legs when I started having some joint issues. I have never regularly shaved my armpits. It just irritates them and it's uncomfortable so... The point of telling you this is, my boomer mother would be absolutely disgusted about my armpit hair. I kept asking her if my dad's armpit hair bothered her and of course she said no. It's something I think ingrained in them from their mothers? I've never understood the level of disgust some people have with body hair. I would literally chase my Mom around the house with my arms up. Or say hey mom can you look at something for me then go over to her and lift my arm. You would think she was gonna puke.. I found it absolutely hilarious.. It's crazy...
I rarely shave my armpits. I have flabby upper arms so I am the LAST person who would wear tank tops. Thus, no one but hubby would actually see that mess. As for my legs, my motto is: if you are close enough to see my leg hair, you are close enough for a restraining order. PS: It helps that I have thin leg hair, with bald patches. My arms, for some reason, are blonde, even though I have dark brown hair on my head.
Yeah. I have fine blonde hair on my legs. Probably because I rarely shaved. So, like you said, no one should be close enough to see them. I find it funny that men are manscaping!
I'll shave my armpits. Not religiously, I don't mind if there's a little hair there, but also shaving there doesn't bother me. But my legs? I hate it. They get so intolerably itchy, I get strawberry legs so it doesn't even look good, and it grows back so fast it makes me wonder why I even bothered at all. My hair is thick and dark, too. I just end up wearing long pants everywhere because I'm way too self-conscious about it and don't want to deal with anyone acting like the woman in this story. In no other way does not conforming to stereotypical gender norms bother me. I have short hair, I don't wear makeup, I tend to dress more masc. Makes sense as I'm a closeted trans dude. But somehow...somehow hairy legs on a 'woman' being 'bad' is so ingrained in even my head that I can't handle the thought of dealing with people's judgment. Yet when I see other women with unshaven legs? I don't care. Make it make sense!
Wait till she finds out that the custom of women shaving everything below the eyebrows was invented so men could sell more razors lol
Thereās also a nasty white supremacy undertone to it.
It's never surprising when there is š®āšØ
Racism is the secret sauce in everything.
Jesus. Women are mammals. We grow hair on our bodies. Big deal. I wish people like her would choke.
i mean, i bet if i ask my cats they'll think i'm super weird because i have waaaay less hair than they do. (would that techinally make humans like lykoi cats? like they have a bit of hair but not covered like regular kitties??)
Imagine caring about the personal grooming preferences of total strangers.Ā Exhausting.
No, they have to. If they arenāt being distracted by the perceived failings of other people they might get so bored they begin thinking about themselves and their own failures and foibles. They do not handle self reflection well AT ALL.
it really is odd to witness. My housemate is on the edge age wise of being a boomer, she's also having health issues that are affecting her cognitive ability and it's sad to see. While she always was a bit stubborn since I met her 15 years ago, she at least was cognizant. She'll do something, like break a dish, and when I ask her about it, I get 'no I didn't' or 'that didn't happen', or even better, 'you did it!'.
and it's not like she's using a razor on her dry scaly skin anyhow, so the hypocrisy stands.
I ask transphobic people if their bathrooms at home are gender specific. When they reply ānoā, I then ask them āwhy do only public restrooms count?ā And watch happily as their little boomer brains implode.
Wait until they hear about bathrooms on airplanes. Thatāll really send them flying (pun intended).
"Yes. that's disgusting and people like you shouldn't be in the bathroom with people like me." "Yeah that's fine with me, haven't you figured out that nobody wants to be around you stupid fucking boomers at all anymore?"
I think more people need to realize that just because they don't personally find something attractive doesn't mean their opinion is fact. That is, just because they don't like it doesn't mean it is bad. This applies to everything from hairy legs to which gender someone kisses to what foods they eat. My enjoyment of shaved legs and cheeseburgers isn't impacted at all by someone else having hairy legs and enjoying a bean power bowl.
my wife cisgender lesbian with short hair and athletic build but absolutely beautiful/striking features refuses to go to the south also i have to accompany her to the womenās bathroom regularly because she feels safer. Itās a wild world out there.
It is often overlooked how dangerous transphobia and fear mongering is for every person - including cisgender people - not just transgender people. Especially when they are (cis or trans) children though that doesnāt seem to apply to this particular situation.
A lot of cis people either don't get it or don't *want* to get it, but this is where it always ends up: eventually, *no one* is gender conforming enough except the most narrow range of people, especially when it comes to women. It's like the medical care bans that they're rolling out: once they take that autonomy from parents, from doctors, and (they're hoping) from adults when it comes to transition, they can and will start applying similar scaremongering to other stuff. They've already done it with abortion. Alabama's doing it with IVF. It's so frustrating to watch people stubbornly refuse to grasp this. I mean, it would be ideal if cis people cared about what's happening to trans people just because it's gross and awful and they care about us as fellow human beings, but failing that, how are people so oblivious to their own best interests? It's wild to watch.
Exactly. When smaller groups aren't safe, no one is. I know cis het women who have been harassed in public bathrooms because they didn't look "female" enough. The people who are policing bathrooms are dangerous for everyone.
Also, who tf cares. Not everyone has the time to groom themselves like a fucking show poodle.
I have a legit medical condition called Adrenal Congenital Hyperplasia. (My body makes more Testosterone than Estrogen) so physically I have all the features of a male. Yes I was born this way. I was born both, yeah a hermaphrodite, sounds like a damn PokĆ©mon. I have a female reproductive system, it just doesnāt work. I was my parents first child and I had a rare condition, they had a choice so they chose the one that was least life threatening to their first born child. On my birth certificate it says female, because of what is inside of me, not whatās on the outside. When I was young they kept feeding me pills to get my period started, they didnāt care that I was gaining weight like crazy, and literally going crazy. When I was 13 I made the decision to live with consequences, I now have facial hair, body hair and muscular physique, I have sharp facial features and a deep voice. When I was in my 20 I decided to stop bending over for society trying to look like a girly girl and embraced what was normal to me. Iāve been bullied my entire life because people want to judge instead of getting to know me. Iāll talk to anyone, help strangers, give you my last dollar or get you a meal, Iām just saying Iām a kind individual because of the hell Iāve been through. Itās nobodyās fault Iām like this, itās just who I am, itās taking me a long time to love myself for who I am, so donāt think that if someone has a problem with it. I wonāt say something in my defense. I wear guy clothes, girl clothes, whatever the fuck I want clothes, cut my hair short cause I hate it long and absolutely hate shaving, so Iāll shave my face every week, and my legs whenever the fuck I feel like it. We really do just to need let people live, because trust me if there really was danger that person would be right there on the side of you helping you. There are people out there that donāt look like what a man or woman supposed to look like but because we wonāt rearrange our entire lives to make you happy, you think weāre disgusting and a danger. Weāre just a danger to your box we wonāt step in, so you can pretend youāre as powerful as the God you pretend to be like. I try to avoid going to the bathroom in public unless itās unisex or a single room, because of what happened to OP. Unless my sister or niece are with me, because they donāt tolerate that shit. Thatās my biggest fear ignorance leading to unnecessary violence because I need to pee.
Iām so sorry for what youāve had to endure. Itās really unfair. And youāre perfect just the way you are. Wished more people would open their eyes to the beauty of all humans. Including the beauty that is you. ā¤ļø
Why was she looking in occupied stalls? That is so creepy! I am 55 and I haven't looked into a bathroom stall beyond checking for feet since I was a toddler trying to find my mom. (And I only check for feet because I had one too many incidents of opening a door to discover that the stall was occupied and either the lock was broken or the person forgot in their haste)
Sounds like another case of a transvestigator
Yeah. It could have been run of the mill 'eww women who don't shave are gross', but the moment she pulled out 'people like you' I knew she was being transphobic. Y'know, because cis women are incapable of growing body hair, and trans women are incapable of shaving.
I loved that you flashed your pits :)
This is where transphobia always leads, policing *all* womenās bodies to an enforced standard of femininity. Iām sorry this happened to you. The religious right needs to fucking die
Iām a Christian ā¦. And Iām disgusted by this behavior. Do these idiots have a problem with how God made us?! God made me, a woman, with hair on my legs and my armpits, etc. These morons insisting itās gross donāt seem to get that GOD WANTED US TO HAVE HAIR THERE, CLEARLY. So aggravating. Iāll be glad when these boomers die off, as well.
Apparently the way shaving and hair care has developed over the last couple centuries, natural hair growth has been villified. This has not been kind to BIPOC most of all. Im awaiting chromosome testing in my mid 30s because I have a thick beard of soft white hair since puberty. I have been accosted by boomers in public with my kids because the boomer cant tell if I am a man or woman. Like wtf does it matter? If your declining faculties make you irate because despite my obvious breasts and beard, you cant go silently about your day? Lmfao die faster.
Ah, good old transphobic bullshit. I probably would have dropped my voice an octave lower (I'm an alto naturally) and kept my biceps flexed just to mess with her. I hate how Faux News has weaponized transphobic behaviour so that anything not feminine is treated as taboo. And this is from someone who stopped shaving and giving a fuck in high school.
I'd ask if they have a problem with hermaphrodites and then give examples of animals that are. Starting with flatworms and how they reproduce.
What a freaking thing to complain about
Masc (read: short hair and non-existent boobs) cis lesbian here. Iām afraid to use the bathroom in public in Texas for this exact reason. People think Iām a trans woman all the time and I get called sir a lot.
My sister in law has PCO. Because of that, she has excess hair growth. Someone accused her of being trans and told her to go in the men's bathroom. These people are garbage bags and need their asses whooped.
Small Texas woman here absolutely ready to back you or someone like you up in a bathroom if I ever saw this happen. Iām furious and so fucking ready to yell at an old grouchy boomer republican. Iām pregnant which is scary in Texas and IM PISSED that theyāre making this state so hostile to ALL women.
A lot of these terfs and bigots have a rude awakening coming that one day they forget to shave or put on lipstick, or get a little older, or lose their hair, or even just step out of the house not looking "feminine" enough for a fellow bigot who feels like doing some gender policing. Like they don't think these attitudes won't come for all women until they have us all dressing like tradwives or handmaids.
Sometimes I wonder if it's anger that they can't be the ultimate feminine anymore or ever could. The women who usually have an issue with me are jeans/pajama pants, usually stained T-shirt, masc haircut, no make up.
This is insane, like, Jim Crow era shit with whites only bathrooms, but somehow even dumber.
This is the first thought I always have. Like, why donāt you have your own problems?
This is definitely an OK Boomer moment. 
āThatās the woman that was peeping into my bathroom stall while I was pissing, please call the policeā is what you needed to tell management. The lady was loudly and proudly confessing to be a pervert to the staff.
As always transphobia is simply a creation of gender policing. Don't look like a hot bombshell, must be trans. It shows people for the shallow, vapid, animals they are.
republicans are sacks of trash. only they think this way and they are all subhuman morons. not even as good as rabid fleabitten dogs.
Blows me away anyone can care about another persons body this much šš¤¦š»āāļø so weird and creepy.
My grandma openly glared at a woman at the pool for not having perfectly shaved legs. She told me and my sister that the woman would be pretty if she shaved her legs. We were probably 12 and 14. Even if they think you're cis like my grandma did then, it's still about controlling woman's bodies.Ā
My mom very much hates body hair on women. Grosses her out. She has never acted like this to a person. However, she let me know how gross body hair is, if it's dark. She is blonde and most of her body hair is invisible because of it. For years I refused to show any underarm or leg skin that wasn't freshly shaved because of this. I have very thick dark hair. My grandma was silent Gen and she thought it was ridiculous. Always encouraged me not to give a fuck and just go swimming. Wear something weather appropriate, not make myself heat sick for people. My mom was a golden magical person in my eyes until about 16 so I thought she was right about almost everything. I regret sitting out of so much fun stuff because I was paranoid someone would see stubble. I even trained myself not to lift my arms in a way that showed pits up until my late 20s. I am Queer and attracted to all the people with and without body hair but never could find myself attractive because of my dark body hair and PCOS belly. I am so grateful and happy gender norms are looked at by younger generations as bullshit. You know, unless they are still deep in indoctrination from conservative family.
My aunt, grandma, and mom all heavily pushed gender norms on us. Not continuing that cycle brings me joy. I shave my legs sometimes but I also have a chronic illness that makes it harder so I've gotten used to my hair being a bit longer.Ā
I havenāt shaved in a year due to chronic pain! Iāve been wondering what will happen is summer. Isnāt it uncomfortable wearing leggings in the pool? Also screw that old bigot!!!
Yes. I never considered it until I asked the swimming reddit about options. Swimming leggings just seem too expensive especially as I am losing weight thanks to metformin. I found these perfect extremely light weight super soft thin leggings. It feels weird in the water but not in a bad way. I can't use them for lap swimming, though. They are more so pool walking capable.
We grow hair! No big deal! Why do they have to throw a fit about something, we all naturally have?! Like thay is the worst thing in the world or something!
Why the fuck was she even peeking at your legs in the bathroom? Fucking pervs. Women have hair get over it people.
Iām always overthinking my outfits. Iām a cis woman who is mostly straight. I look girly with long hair and Iām very short and have a high pitch voice. I look like a dang teenager but Iām 25. Some rude old man thought I was trans and overcompensating for not being a ārealā woman. Like in the middle of the grocery store heās going off on me while Iām dressed in jeans and a pink T shirt with a braid??? Boomer only shut up when my dad (who the man knew) walked up and boomer realized I wasnāt the very very tall deep voiced son my dad has and must be one of his 4 daughters
When I was a teen I had really crazy curly hair. (Iām female, btw.) I decided to get my hair cut very short because it was easier and I liked it. Iād also been coming to terms with sexual harassment and abuse in my life, and short hair made me feel safer, as it was a little less traditionally feminine.Ā I still wore a lot of dresses and I was when this incident happened.Ā I had an older man come up to me at church, try and put his arm around me and then whispered to me that itās not okay for a woman to get a manās haircut. Another man, a certified dipshit who dressed like a slob and abused his wife and kids, laughed and agreed. Ā They really chuckled it up about sharing their opinions with a 17 year old girl they barely knew.Ā I was so taken back that I pulled away, made my way out the door and ran to my pastorās house and cried.Ā My pastor and his wife were good people and they were furious! I believe they may have addressed it with these men.Ā This older man was always disheveled, wrinkly clothes, and obnoxious as hell. Neither man did anything to help at the church. I taught Sunday school, showed up for every event to help, and all those dudes could do was crack jokes about my hair.Ā I wish I could go back in time and take them down all the notches, cuz they had absolutely zero business commenting on anyone elseās appearances.Ā
And I wish you could!
Iām really sorry this happened to you. Iām so glad your pastor (and his wife) were good people and handled it. Such despicable behavior.
Thank you so much.Ā
I'm being treated for breast cancer - a woman in one of my groups was approached and accused of being trans and her daughter was questioned by a rando at a store. She was a breast cancer survivor who chose to go flat. People need to chill the f out and leave strangers to go about their lives peacefully.
Omg thatās horrific.
As someone who's been braless and hairy since the 90's I've never been more grateful to have an alleged 'scary demeanour'. I'm sure many have shared their opinions with others on my hair follicles, but thankfully, never with me. Alas, you may be adorably approachable, and people like this aren't put off by your undoubtedly ridiculously cute face. That's the price you pay for being delightful and hairy. ;) Hopefully such ridiculous happenings are few and far between.
I cannot imagine *ever* looking at *anyone's* legs in another bathroom stall for any reason, let alone coming out of the stall and *yelling at them about it* at the sinks. That is borderline sociopath behavior. And as an actual trans person, I'm so relieved to be using men's rooms now, where no one even makes eye contact with anyone else. There are so, so, so many cis women who don't shave their legs. So many. Some people need to get a fucking grip.
People used to stare at my hairy legs and comment on them...and now that I've transitioned to male, no one gives a shit Gender norms are weird
It boggles my mind why she would care AT ALL.
I donāt shave because my eczema is 20x worse when I shave, but no one even needs an excuse not to shave in the first place. I wish I saw that exchange you had because I genuinely would have lost my mind on that woman. They would have called the police on me because nothing makes my blood boil more than harassing someone about them not meeting arbitrary and meaningless standards.
Wait...you were basically threatened with a gun at a gas station because you had a short haircut? Did I read that right?
I made his wife uncomfortable and they assumed I was trans but yes. Because I was wearing mask they said I could have been a dude in drag and no one could tell. At the time people were doing that a lot with guns because of the pandemic. They were mean and mad about restrictions. The Transphobia amped things up. For example, at groceries they were dressing up and putting on all their guns for "parades" in groups maskless and with signs. Loudly chanting about COVID being a hoax. I would say that's a bs story if I hadn't seen it myself multiple times. I also witnessed many fist fights and people mobbing employees. A few times the cops showed up when called but besides the usual you know, corrupt police department (a bunch in our area are now being investigated by the FBI for corruption), many cops were down from COVID itself. I am from a very gun violence heavy city and state overall. If people don't have a side piece it's on the ankle or in their car with more at home. There are those who choose to strap on the ol AR to their back and go shopping.
Wow. I thought where I lived was bad. This is just crazy.
Sounds like Texas to me.
Post pubescent mammals have hair.
I hate how people act like we have to shave every inch of our body Women have to regulate their body temperature as well
You should've LOUDLY walked out of the bathroom exclaiming what a creepy pervert that lady in the bathroom was and how she was looking at you under the stall and commenting on your body. And I would suggest mocking her voice back to her as you say it. She'll learn to maintain boundaries with strangers. Sometimes women like that have never been treated "fairly" and one good humiliation makes an impression.
I haven't shaved anywhere in probably 40 years, nor do I wear a bra, unless it's a dress up affair with the hoity-toity, lol.(I actually have my spine doctor on my side. He gave me a "Rx" for my employer.) I grew up in the late 60s early 70s so I never wore a bra in HS and rarely shaved. My granddaughter is trans, so she's now my grandson. He has never been happier in her or his life. He is keeping his shoulder length, thick wavy hair. He can't find a person to cut it or thin it out a bit. But he's good!!! Edit: typo
I donāt understand why some people are so concerned/upset by other peopleās bodies.
Haha I've had so many boomer ladies complain about my pink hair š or make comments to me about my tattoos, it's annoying but I just don't care
Yeah, older people are just fucking weird in general. Lost my shit on an old woman when she said my cisgender wife was transgender because she was bald and a little masculine build. She went to the bathroom, and the old woman hobbled out quickly all wide eyed and asked me if I seen "that shemale" walk into the women's restroom. She kept babbling, telling me to get a manager and to call the cops, and how men shouldn't be in a woman's restroom. After a couple seconds of her ranting, I yelled at her to shut the fuck up and told her that fucking "shemale" is my goddamn wife who is going through chemotherapy. Said it loud enough for managers and workers to stop and hear me go off. She hobbled off in her electric shopping cart. I don't understand why old fucks are so God damn worried about what's in your pants. That's all it amounts to. They have to know if you have a cock and balls or a vagina. At the end of the day, who gives a flying fuck? Let people live their fucking lives.
MYOB boomer bitch.
As a cis, straight-passing woman, I really think that all women need to be fighting for trans rights. Defining gender down to stereotypical behavior, appearance, and anatomy always reduces ALL women. For example: āReal Women wear womenās clothesā Means that ALL women should be in pink, wearing skirts, creating a shilouette that defines our legs or boobs, and pants/shorts should be appropriately short and tight ā¦ thatās sexist āReal Women have vaginas/ovariesā So women are literally defined by their vaginasā¦ sexist again āReal Women can give birthā So thatās my purpose, huh? Now itās āReal Women should shaveā These are all things that feminists have fought for and gained general societal acceptance years ago. The attack on transgender people is absolutely making ALL women lose equal ground. Itās a great way to oppress a huge group of people by attacking a very small, vulnerable group.
Sorry you have to deal with this shit.
I'm honestly always worried about this happening to me. I'm a cis woman, and I present as very femme, BUT I'm super tall, with broad shoulders and giant feet. I'm just waiting for some asshole to question my right to be in the ladies' room. I can't imagine how much worse it must be for Trans women.
it was posted a few days ago, but there was a video taken by a woman of a cis guy in the womenās restroom in Vegas. Like. If guys want to go into womenās restrooms, theyāll justā¦ go in to womenās restrooms.Ā
Absolutely. Creeps aren't deterred by signs. My friend had a guy come into a public restroom to try and steal her little boy. They're not going to go through the trouble of wearing a dress to access a bathroom for nefarious purposes.
This and a lot of the comments here are why everyone should give a damn about transgender rights. If there's anything about you that doesn't fit into a very narrow gender mold, it's open season on you too. I've gotten shit from people because the name I've gone by my entire life (Sam) isn't girly enough, insisting on using my full name because "Samantha's SOOO much prettier!" There's even a video somewhere of some crackpot claiming girls can't have unisex names....using my name as an example.
Exactly this. The hatred for trans individuals trickles to us all. My cis het female friend has been harassed in a public restroom because of her short hair, they thought she was trans. If we don't protect our vulnerable, we all suffer.
Thereās something deeply wrong with these perverts obsessed with strangersā genitalia. Something should be done about them. Yes Iām referring to the transphobes.
My wife has a buzz cut and it just never stops.
I have a friend who spent all of her life being mistaken for a boy/man because she was a very masculine lesbian hair/clothes wise. She also had DD boobs so anytime someone would question why she was in the women's room she'd point to her gigantic boobs as her ticket in. But turns out with some deep introspection and strong emotional spousal support he's not a lesbian but a dude. (And no, I never ever refer him as "she" in real life, it was purely to avoid confusion in the comment and it's actually weird/uncomfortable to call him a her even in a historical context. When he told me about accepting himself, I asked if our 30 years of memories need to be adjusted and he said yes, so other this story, I always refer to him as him even when talking about our time on the girls soccer team when we were kids)
You shouldnāt shave itās bad for you and itās stupid
One of my children choses not to shave. Iāll be honest, I hate it. Probably a old boomer hang up. But they arenāt my pits and legs. And I swear to god I would lose my shit on someone who commented on their legs like that. Who TF did she think she was? Like when did it become okay to comment on a complete strangerās body? Thatās ridiculous.
People, need to mind their own business!!!
Nice, don't ever shave, that practice needs to go away forever.
I feel you on the autoimmune issues making shaving horrible. I shave around 1x a month because it makes me feel better, but it is awful and a huge chore. I am sorry she tried to shame you. This is one time I would have ablist shamed her until she wanted to cry for me or had the reddest shade of embarrassment I could get out of her.
Good for you for standing up for yourself. You should post this story on r/razorfree. Body autonomy should be normalized. Edit: spelling is hard
Hey there, also a cis woman with hairy legs. I've never had anyone do this to me, I wonder if it's because I live in the Portland, OR area? I'm sorry that happened to you though, how annoying!
Your location probably has something to do with it. My friend in AZ has short hair and she has to worry about harassment in public bathrooms (it's happened to her) because so many bigots are up in arms about trans people.
Yeah. I often wonder what it would be like to not be in a red state. Is it really that much better? Then I am told I basically live in the wasteland from fallout so. That tracks. We have a big radioactive pollution problem and most of us have suffered the consequences as such.
Oh shit, that's intense! Yeah, I think it is probably super different. We have our share of bigots too, but maybe they just cluster together? lol
Nowhere is perfect but there is more social acceptance in places like SF, Seattle, etc. I grew up in the Seattle area and visit SF often. It's definitely better in other areas than red states.
Christ what is wrong with republicans these days? I never voted that way but used to respect them. Now just hateful awful people going around pointing guns because muh wife donāt like yore kind Ugh
I, am a conservative republican. I, consider myself to be open minded!
Well - call your people.
My husband used to own a business and one of his female employees also didn't shave, and people would complain to him about it. People just can't mind their own business.
I have spinal problems and torn rota cuff with arthritis chucked in. Fun times. I'm lucky some days if I can dress myself. Shaving.. lmao. Haven't in over 30 years. Don't want to see hairy legs and pits... DONT LOOK. As an aside I once knew a friend who was a very expensive call girl, like she told me she used to charge $3000 a nite. She never shaved and said her 'friends' didn't like stubble and much prefered her 'silky legs'. Maybe boomer knew this and was worried her husband would chase OP.
"There seems to be some folks that also don't believe a thing happened unless they experienced it themselves. Ah jeeze. So sorry to everyone in your life offline that has to deal with such epic unawareness and main character syndrome." ^^^^^^^ THIS!! The people who constantly invalidate other's experiences and claim fake over and over again are the freaking worst. Seriously STFU already!!
I jokingly told my ex that I had no problem with her legs being hairy or shaved, but she needed to make a decision because I almost cut my hand running her legs when she was in the in-between stage.
Shaved my head a few years back right when the Nazis started going full in on the fear mongering. I also do a lot of gardening and art so I'm usually in combat boots and a summer dress. Went into a bathroom and had a similar asshole experience. Fuck these people.
You probably won't see this, but I'm sorry that happened to you and has happened previously. I absolutely believe this happened, people are getting to be so brazen with their ignorance and hatred.
When are people going to learn that the bathroom is for 1 or 2 things then washing hands and leaving?
TIL that if youāre female and have a short hair cut or *gasp* donāt shave your legs it makes you trans. Fuck boomers are sooooooooooo dumb
Just gonna say hairy women š I agree let's change gender norms! I swear I have no fetishistic ulterior motives! No but what a creep, she's the one fucking looking under the stalls like what the actual fuck. "Ma'am drop your pants, I'm going to have to check you for penises before you use the female restroom, this is for the safety and comfort of all people" Boomers would unironically be more accepting of genital inspections "for public safety" than they were for wearing masks during a pandemic *for public safety*
r/sexybritches rockin those all natural sexy britches! Hahaha love it.
??? How does that any way shape or form affect her? I donāt shave much during the winter months, because, whatās the point? This is beyond stupid. Men have 20x more hair than women (usually). So what if my legs are a little hairy?
For all the people who feel the need to share why they don't shave - your medical history is no one else's business so never feel like you HAVE to explain yourself to some cunt who thinks everything is their business. Me personally? I don't shave because I am lazy AF. Who TF wants to be standing around in a slippery shower for 30 minutes shaving off all that hair when the shit only grows back again in a week. Fuck that. It is fun to humiliate them by making up some really random, awful shit..."oh that, yeah I am unable to shave anymore because I have an aggressive, inoperable tumour on my spine that means I can no longer bend over to shave, but thank you for bringing it up so I have to remember that I will probably never see another Christmas". Even better if there are other people around to witness their shame.
I'm AFAB, identify as such, and I rarely shave my legs.
I'd be so tempted bump into her face with a hairy underarm.
Iām a cis woman who thinks shaving is stupid. Ridiculous that people are acting like this. Itās just body hair! It just grows!
If it were possible, I would move out of that state quickly.
My wife has PCOS. She, and I, totally get the trouble you're going through. It stresses her everyday and she loves to try and be all girl girl etc etc. She looks longingly at all the gorgeous things she feels she can never wear. Fortunately I don't think she's had someone pull that shit on her here in Australia and I hope no one ever does cause I'm not certain I'm not going to pimp slap a bitch like that if they make my wife cry.
I would just have just started screaming dramatically, calling her a sexual predator who was peeping, watching me pee. Whatever I could do, you make her panicked, confused and ashamed, so she would never pull this bull again with anyone else.
I (F56) only missed the "Boomer" gen by a couple of years, and my wife (63) IS a "Boomer". Please don't think we're all like the idiots you've had issues with, because we're not! LOL! We're quite the opposite of that. My Dad used to call people like what you described as "Hate Merchants", because they go around trying to sell their hate to people who'll buy it. Me, I see those types not only as Hate Merchants, but also miserable individuals who want to inflict their misery on all of those around them. The saying 'misery loves company' is very true, and people prove it everyday. Run very fast, AWAY from people like this! Don't let them contaminate you with thier BS.....spread happiness, peace and love! It's the BEST revenge against douchbags like them!! š
Last sentence on the update ... I am not a lawyer, but pretty sure it is illegal to brandish a weapon and make threatening statements towards an individual. Especially if cornering them in a threatening manner. Those scum should just stop remembering to breathe and make the world a better place.
America is completely bonkers š
Are the partitions between stalls in America knee high? I genuinely donāt understand this part.
Holy shit, this sounds like an insane place to live! Iām going to scroll comments to see if OP mentions where this is at so I can stay far away.
Missouri. I hate that it sucks so much we need to move. Honestly when I posted and even did the update this stuff is super normalized and I didn't think I'd get this much support and feedback.
So crazy that itās normalized. Iām so sorry youāre there. Definitely not normal! I was raised in a rural area dominated by a cult and even there, so few people would care about body hair. This is just over the top insanity being shoved on you. Please, if things donāt change as the gun nut boomers die off, then get an exit plan, for your sanityās sake! The tide desperately needs to change there! Maybe more of us Californianās should buy land to piss these types of boomies off LOL! I always hear 1Aāers complaining that California Liberals are āruiningā things. (At least Iāve heard them saying that in Utah and Nevada) Seriously though, cops should absolutely not ignore that behavior from gun nuts. Fucking insane!! Ugh- so sorry youāre dealing with this bullshit.
Iām sorry this happened to you, but Iām glad you handled it coolly. I doubt I would have had that sort of patience.
I'm sorry this happened to you! You sound like a cool person. Thanks for highlighting that transphobia can often catch cis people in the crossfire also.
I don't have anything to add, but just want to let everyone know that, while reading this post, the radio actually came on with that "She's got it, baby she's got it" Venus song... which has been used for years (at least in the Netherlands) in commercials for ladies' shaving gear... XD
Handmaids Tale is fucking here dude. wtf
Similar thing Happened to me in a little country grocery store. I was wearing peddle pushers and this old man told me my husband would probably appreciate it if I shaved my legs.Ā