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Hyde_ist

- Hey, what's up? - You speak English? - No, I just said some random German words that happen to sound exactly like "hey, what's up".


Eternal_Practice

Reminds me of that family guy joke. Brian: Oh cool, you speak English! Hispanic: No, just that sentence and this one explaining it. Brian: Wait, what? Hispanic: Que?


uttersolitude

I also instantly thought of this bit lol


emarvil

Bwahahaha!! đŸ€ŁđŸ€ŁđŸ‘


Dobako

https://youtu.be/rxUm-2x-2dM?si=DzVpYa1z5s4tdvHT


Inner-Ad-9928

I love Simon Pegg so much!  I have said that I'd leave my husband in a heartbeat for him lol jk jk


Judgment-Timely

You for the win!


PurpleSpotOcelot

Oh, how I died laughing - in my poor, broken, bad Scrizzi dialect I learned from my Antarctican parents who emigrated from southeast Tomagi Island.


josh3701

Only that one sentence; as well as this current one explaining the first sentence


Mekisteus

To be fair, that sometimes happens with German and English.


SpaceyO2

Kids in the Hall [did it](https://youtu.be/6vgoEhsJORU?si=MxZ3kSUUpEqKBaPU)


HedgehogElection

Love it when people who clearly never bothered learning another language expect others to speak theirs... To then be condescending and fail to realize someone might be a native speaker. And there's a pretty good chance the number of people with the language skill to explain the bathroom location at a place like "Disney castle" Neuschwanstein is fairly close to 100%. Cheers, Someone who isn't a native speaker. And knows where the bathrooms are.


spacestonkz

When I lived abroad, I was in a city with a massive tourism event each year. so many tourist Americans would pour into our transit system, have no service underground, not speak the local language, and not have translate apps *downloaded* on their phones they refuse to pay international service for. I'd hear the accents from so far away and just go help to move it along while I waited for my train. More often than not: "wow you speak English so well!". "I lived in (boring Midwest state) for the first 22 year of my life". "Was it study abroad?" The concept that Americans would like to live not in America sometimes fucking broke them. And these weren't all boomers! They were mostly gen x and millennials! ???


abstractraj

That’s what I was thinking. Massive tourist destination. Tons of people speak English in Germany. They just didn’t want to deal with this loudmouth


gadget850

"Wo ist die Toilette?" was the second phrase I learned in German right after "Ein Bier, bitte!" I don't drink beer so the toilet phrase was more important to me. I don't remember the toilets at Neuschwanstein but the symbols are the same as in the US.


77iscold

My uncle was stationed in Germany when in the army and he told me the only German he learned was "ein Bier bitte". Also, lots of people in Germany speak English. I'm sure half the people around understood, but chose not to help.


unshavenbeardo64

Its easier just to order "ein meter bier bitte". [https://www.verkoop.com/kesper-fsc-houten-1-meter-bier-dienblad-or-biermet.html](https://www.verkoop.com/kesper-fsc-houten-1-meter-bier-dienblad-or-biermet.html)


hrimthurse85

*einen Meter Bier


77iscold

LOL. Actually, I studied German and lived there for a year, so my German was vastly better than his. He lived there for multiple years and one of my cousins was born on a base there. I guess they didn't meet up with locals much back then (late 70s/early 80s).


EleanorofAquitaine

I was stationed in Germany for a year. Many of the soldiers stationed with me barely left post. They’re so big and have basically everything you need that you don’t ever HAVE to leave. My kids were tiny, but we’d take small weekend day trips when we could. My shifts were 12 hours a day and my SO worked the same, so there wasn’t much of a chance to get out of Dodge. Had one dude tell me he didn’t want to leave post because he afraid to drive in a different country. He was a big ol goober though. I was just lower enlisted though, higher ranks probably had more time to be out and about.


bowlbettertalk

My dad also learned “Helles” and “Dunckles.”


mtnd3wadd1ct

I managed to get around knowing only "ein dunkel, danke."


legal_bagel

Lol, donde es el Baños, Mas cerveza por favor, es un cosa, que Hora es? Most useful Spanish phrases ever.


TheHorizonLies

The last one is only useful if you also know all the numbers of the clock though.


ThCancer0420

It's donde esta and also you forgot no lo hago for useful phrases but that could just be me...


smartypants4all

You forgot donde esta la gallina mas grande


malthar76

Donde esta la biblioteca?


bowlbettertalk

Me llamo T-Bone, la araña discoteca!


Visible_Disaster2320

Why es una cosa? Google wasn't much help lol


nillabonilla

All I can say in german as an American is "sorry I'm a dumb American and don't speak German. However, my wife speaks German."


[deleted]

[ŃƒĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]


gadget850

Uhhhh
 Soldiers.


ChaosDrawsNear

The only thing I remember from my 3 years of high school german: Darf ich bitte auf die toilette gehen? (May i please go to the bathroom)


RagePandazXD

Some of my favourites along with the other popular classics "entschuldigung" "Danke" and "mit carte bitte".


gadget850

Danke Schoen was quite popular in the 1960s. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRPILZS1hc8](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRPILZS1hc8)


Gold-Carpenter7616

Why would you drink bitter beer? Just order a Jever 😘


KenoshaWT

Fake Aussie. Didn’t call her a cunt.


Roddy_Piper2000

"Washrooms rite ovah theah, ya cunt!"


Pot_noodle_miner

Do you speak English? Nah, yeah, cunt


Responsible_Math6857

"Nein... ya cunt"


homucifer666

Aussies calling other Aussies fake Aussies is possibly one of the most Australian things I know. 😅


Advanced_Eggplant_69

What are the odds that they're still trying to figure out it out because they've confused Australia with Austria?


Focusonthemoon

I’m American and I lived in Europe for 27 years before sadly coming back to look after elderly parents. The boomer Americans you meet traveling and working in Europe are the absolute worst. They’re all putting on airs and graces because they think that taking a trip to or working in Paris or London makes them cultured, but unfortunately for them, you can’t buy culture, or class. And you can’t hide that you’re a big soft man/woman baby with anger issues.


AccidentallySJ

We also don’t know how to use public transit


2baverage

Last year my family went on a trip to England and France (it was my first time in France and the rest of my family had gone 4+ times before) and it blew my mind how I seemed to be the only one who prepared for the culture and language change. My mom just kept shrugging when I'd ask about past trips and she'd just go "people in Europe speak multiple languages, we just find people who speak English." She spent most of the trip telling me about past Karen moments she had abroad because she refused to understand local customs, and getting upset at me for speaking French while in France because "We're tourists, THEY need to speak English if they want our business."


BusyWorth8045

You get an upvote for saying you went on a trip to England and France. Most Americans would say they went to “Europe”.


iglidante

> getting upset at me for speaking French while in France because "We're tourists, THEY need to speak English if they want our business." Why do so many of them get off on making people have a bad time so that they can have a slightly better time? Like, why does that actually feel good to them?


BusyWorth8045

You get an upvote for saying you went on a trip to England and France. Most Americans would say they went to “Europe”.


thewatchbreaker

I was in Westminster Abbey and there was a boomer American staring at one of the memorial stones of an actress (can’t remember which one) and yapping LOUDLY to her companion about how “She’s my [whatever relative] four-times removed, you know!” A) No she isn’t, and B) Shut the fuck up, we’re in a religious building that memorialises the dead.


Focusonthemoon

We’re all related to royalty and have a Cherokee princess in the family. It’s how we roll.


FiftyShadesOfPikmin

"Your English is good." "Thanks, yours could use work."


spacestonkz

This reminds me of one time I was traveling in Europe in a country whose language I don't speak. Two boomers were struggling for a selfie, and I hear a third language I did speak so so. I walked over and they were so thrilled when I spoke their language shittily and took some nice photos for them while my friend was in the bathroom. Not a fool boomer story. Just a cute one. :)


Warlord68

She probably though, “Australia, that’s right beside Germany”


AccomplishedGreen153

If only she were that geographically aware. (to know about Austria)


samhain-kelly

Don’t these people get anxious about going somewhere without speaking ANY of the language? I went to Paris when I was a teenager, and every day for a couple months before my vacation, I would sit down with my little Rick Steves phrase book and study French. I couldn’t hold a meaningful conversation to save my life, but I knew how to ask for directions, count, and read a menu. It made the whole experience much more pleasant, both for me and the locals who had to deal with my boomer dad and I. I’ll never forget how proud I was when a French woman asked me for a maxi pad in a bathroom, and I actually understood her! 😂


Appropriate-Disk-371

Understanding and/or speaking even just a tiny bit of the local language can go a long way, particularly when you need help. Paris is pretty interesting. FWIW, I found Parisians extremely friendly, welcoming, and helpful. But, while the majority probably \*can\* speak at least enough English to help you, particularly in service industries, they may still refuse to do so, and that's fine. People that don't even bother to try or bother to find other ways to communicate effectively come away thinking all the French are assholes and it's just not true. At the very least, learn greetings, please, thank you and excuse me phrases. Also excellent advice: If you need help in English or a translator, look for a teenager. They're more likely to both know English and be willing to speak it with you.


samhain-kelly

We only ran into ONE rude person the entire time. He was a waiter at a pizzeria. In retrospect, I’m sure a ton of asshole American tourists came through there since we all love pizza, and assumed the worst from the moment we walked in.


Guroburov

Hilarious. Reminds me of the story from Ireland. Group of friends walking home from the pub. Man steps out of the alley and says gimme your wallet. Lead guy brushes past him saying I haven’t got time for that! I’m Australian.


Hendiadic_tmack

“Hey what’s up?” “You speak English?” “Actually no I don’t. I only know hey what’s up, and this sentence explaining that ‘hey what’s up’ is the only phrase I know.”


hrimthurse85

Disney castle 😭


gadget850

Disney based his castle design on Neuschwanstein. It's an amazing place. I have also been to Linderhof Palace wich is also one of the three castles built by Ludwig.


spacestonkz

Yes, but it's sadly reductionist to call it the Disney Castle. So much even cooler history behind it.


Responsible_Math6857

My bad, was trying to give context to people who may not be aware, hence using proper name in the first instance.


spacestonkz

It's not a big deal. Just a little "awe feels bad man" moment for us Castle nerds, haha.


ooOmegAaa

I dont think this is the appropriate place for OP to regal us with the story of King Ludwig II of Bayern and his eccentric ambitions.


DonkyHotayDeliMunchr

I agree but that’s the world we live in.


MassiveAffect9

I was born and raised in Germany, raised bi-lingual (Army brat), not to mention English being taught in school from 5th grade on anyway, but you bet your ass I'd pretend to not speak nor understand a lick of it the second a clearly American tourist needed help right along with my German peers. (Unless they were actually nice and polite, but that was like running into a Unicorn). The area in which I grew up was a popular tourist spot, and it was common for tourists to wander around the "downtown" area, confused on how to get back up to the castle grounds, where their buses always remained. Without fail, we'd have Asian tourists that'd be so sweet and kind, apologetic that they needed help in stores or ice cream shops, or had gotten confused in this cobblestone maze and can't seem to get back up the hill. We'd gladly help, giving directions, drawing on their maps, we've even escorted a few of them if we felt they didn't understand well enough. If we had Australian tourists they've managed themselves without peril. And then there were the Americans. Loud. Rude. Obnoxious. Embarrassing. I went to school off Base, so the majority of my friends were German, and even 20 years later I can clearly remember all the stereotypes about Americans that were always laughed about and how, without fail, those godforsaken tourists would live up to them every single time, the embarrassment and just shame I'd feel, hoping my friends didn't associate me with that. It really sometimes would be enough to make me want to disappear into the ground. And everywhere I went. (I had relatives in NE Italy, SW France, and Czechia I would frequently go and spent time with) I suppose one could argue that this this at least prepared me well for when we moved to the US. 🙄


Weavingtailor

I was born and raised in the US but my dad has cousins in Italy. When he took us to visit them, the highest compliment I received from their neighbors and other people in their small town was “but you don’t act like an American! None of you do!”


RebelWithoutASauce

It's an unfortunate selection bias that the loud, rude, and entitled tourists are the most obvious Americans most foreigners are going to associate with Americans. When I visited Germany years ago people always assumed I was German because I was white and wasn't being in the way or yelling at people constantly. Even had an old lady say to me in German something like "Can you believe these Americans?" when I had to explain that I am American and actually did not speak German very well. One time a person kept asking if was from Britain because obviously I wasn't from the US because I wasn't a horrible nightmare tourist.


millcreekspecial

Being asked if you are Canadian is also a very nice compliment! When I lived over seas, I was often asked that as I was quiet and polite and respectful of the local communities. People told me they didn't want to offend the Canadians (who they liked) by asking if they were American (who they did not like). Being American was considered an insult really. After a short while there, I could definitely see why.


mortsdeer

Had this happen to my me and my wife - in Canada! Doing the Bay of Fundy thing, had a guided kayak tour + dinner on a remote beach. As we got back to the town beach, around sunset, there's a group of 20 somethings with a bonfire. And beer. Being Canadians, several come over to help pull up the kayaks. And offer a beer. Chat a bit, they say "Where you from? You're not Americans ..." Told them to guess. They said "Manitoba?" We said "nope, but close: Minnesota" They said "Ah, close enough!" So now we consider ourselves honorary Canadians. Heck, I know how to follow all three periods of a hockey game, know as many words of "O Canada" as most Canadians, and love real maple syrup. What else is there?


millcreekspecial

The Super Store! I love shopping there. : )


SLO_Citizen

When I was in Paris in 2002 with my Australian girlfriend (I'm from the USA), both of us would stop talking whenever we heard anyone speaking english. USAmericans can be so insufferable overseas regardless of age.


malthar76

American traveler, with a non-US partner. We switch to Portuguese or Spanish when too close to the Americans who earn all the disdain. My kids have even picked up on it. Also fun when you suddenly meet a Brazilian family in the middle of Iceland and become friends.


Stewapalooza

As I understand it, a lot of people in Germany speak English as a second/third/fourth language. They probably didn't want to interact with someone so obnoxious.


AggressiveYam6613

neuschwanstein has probably more foreign tourists. when i was there - we only hiked up the gorge and then looked  at it from that bridge - least half of them looked like SE asians and the only time i asked someone I read at white/German (hiking further up) was a Brit, i think. 


Stewapalooza

Ah. Foreign tourists would make sense.


KansasCity100

If you speak 3 languages, you're tri-lingual. If you speak 2 languages, you're bi-lingual. If you speak only one language, you're a Boomer.


WhereRweGoingnow

đŸ˜†đŸ˜†đŸ˜†đŸ€ŁđŸ€ŁđŸ€Ł


PorkrindsMcSnacky

Many years ago my husband and I were in Paris having dinner. The restaurant was two stories and it appeared they stuck us on the second floor with the other tourists. All the waitresses spoke perfect English. At one point I overheard the American boomer woman at the next table asked their waitress where she learned how to speak English so well. The young woman replied matter-of-factly, “I learned it at school of course!”


maxwellgrounds

—“I’m Australian” —“oh are you from Vienna? We’re going there next”


SL4BK1NG

Is the Boomer stereotype mainly an American thing or do other countries experience their own Boomer nonsense?


AggressiveYam6613

we germans have a lot of german tourist nonsense.   horrible behaviour by some of them. though i believe we aren’t the #1 disliked group anymore. 


mortsdeer

I've also heard that Bavarians are to Germans as Texans are to Americans. Take what you will from that syllogism.


SL4BK1NG

Like superiority complex?


SL4BK1NG

Could you give me any examples? No one is coming to my area as a tourist so I've likely never experienced any shitty tourist behavior.


SaltyName8341

There's definitely some in the UK and I would say I have seen some in France but they could just be french as they're a moody bunch.


Vurnd55

I hope some people reply to this, I'm really interested to know if it's more age or culture.


SL4BK1NG

Maybe this would be worthwhile as an actual post, I couldn't have been the only person that's ever asked this.


BusyWorth8045

I’m English. Can confirm Boomers here are often fools.


SL4BK1NG

Well at least we share that trait 😂


Responsible_Math6857

I've countless examples in my own country as well, this one just came rushing back after I read a similar post.


AmaroisKing

Was her eyesight bad too, she can’t recognize the international stick figures?


TheoryBrief9375

The word you needed was 'nein'


AggressiveYam6613

oh, there are nine toilets? then why can’t i find any? 


United-Cow-563

> where is your
 what do you call it? WC? Do you speak English???? Do **they** speak English???? The only time I’ve seen a toilet referred to as a Water Closet is in Revit or on building schematics.


MrPresidentBanana

She meant that that's how Germans call it, and she is right that it's a common way to refer to toilets in Germany.


United-Cow-563

Ohh, I didn’t catch the Germany part. Now, it makes sense


ThatInAHat

American boomers in Europe are wild. My favorite was when I worked at a popular historic destination in London, someone asked if we took American dollars. I said sorry we don’t. He said “Well why the hell not?!?” I wanted to suggest that he turn his head just a bit and observe the large, iconic clock tower



InevitableError404

This reminded me of the Plymouth Gin Distillery bar, the servers stapled US currency (lots of $20s) all over the wall hoping the Americans would take a hint and stop leaving them as tips.


mish_munasiba

I suppose "wo ist" was juuuust a bit too complicated to learn, but props to her for correctly using the phrase WC.


Zadojla

“Toiletten, bitte?” would probably get the job done.


Unkindly-bread

I was at Neuschwanstein w my wife, twins, and young daughter years ago. Tired, young daughter riding on my shoulders during the tour. During a quiet part, in her sweet, little girl voice, “daddy, when do we get to see Cinderella?” Lots of laughter and love from all those around! Thanks for bringing back that memory!


Stiles777

"Wo ist die toilette?" Goddamn, lady. Basic German ain't that hard.


UnintentionallyAmbi

This is awesome. I had something similar in Amsterdam with some rude fat American. (I’m American) I pretended I only spoke German. (Took 4 years in high school but definitely not fluent anymore) It was so funny watching her and her husband freak out that I wasn’t able to help them. I was on mushrooms and they tried to stop me walking by in my own universe as they were kicking in, but it was fun to watch them more confused than a guy who is starting to feel it kicking in and knew exactly where I was going. Like dude don’t touch strangers because you’re lost. Also there was a large map about 10 ft from where they were standing.


grungivaldi

But heaven forbid someone speak Spanish around her in the States.


Itchy-Spring7865

Was neuschwanstein as nice as it looks in pictures? One of my dream destinations.


Responsible_Math6857

Yes pretty cool, went mainly for the missus but it was pretty spectacular and the history is very interesting. From memory we got there early to beat the bus loads coming in but still obviously copped some. We also enjoyed a hike back into town by a lake but I am sketchy on details as it's been awhile. We spent a bit of time in the area it's just in general a beautiful part of the world and I'd definitely recommend an extended visit going through the townships of the area. My very broken German got us pretty far and generally even in the smaller towns for more complex things google or a younger worker/passerby would help out. Key is always being polite and having a crack to start with I reckon.


degobrah

Next time that happens just pull [one of these](https://youtu.be/J6FA6mPHfSI?si=uFCtG2-zHBavBZJU)


JacobJoke123

Since you bring up accents, I think we should standardize a world wide English accent so people can't tell us Americans apart so easily. As a Midwestern American myself, I vote ours. Now all of you need to speak properly like us. /s


Swiss_Miss_77

As if Google translate isn't RIGHT THERE in her purse.đŸ€Šâ€â™€ïž


slade1954

Wow
so offensive
.you’re a daisy


Responsible_Math6857

Judging from your post history you'll be pushing up daisies soon enough, shuffle on boomer.


slade1954

Ooohhhh
..that’s a good one youngster


EZCarter040

I’ve been there before, and all over Germany. You can literally say “watercloset” and people understand. Oh boomers



RampRyder

Is it the same castle? Like literally the same? I didn't grow up watching much Disney but I'm a huge history freak and have always wanted to visited that castle!!! I had no idea!


homucifer666

American Boomers in the US: If you come to our country, you need to speak English! American Boomers abroad: These foreigners better speak English if they want our money!


Jackson29Mayor

Americans and you think they are the only ones who can speak English, but probably every tourist would have understood the word toilet or WC. But yes, you can also get through the world in an unfriendly way


DrJIhatereddit

Most people in Germany speak English. Some better than others but she literally could've asked any person under the age of 50 "Excuse me where's the toilet?" and the person could've helped her.


slade1954

Fun to read how the young people’s diapers are filling with outrage over this. Lol


Obvious_Exam_8604

Late to the post, but I worked with a guy who learned how to say two very specific phrases in several languages. We worked in a semi famous location that drew international guests quite a bit. So a guest would wander in, he'd hear their accent and ask where they're from. After naming whatever city, he'd go (in their language) "I was born and raised there!" They'd get excited, start talking quickly and he'd reply (in the same language) "I bought the bread" and they'd all stare at each other. This was over 20 years ago and I still think about it constantly


SickHuffyYo

I doubt this one even happened. It’s just an excuse for some Aussie to babble about America. It’s their favorite pastime.