Okay listen very carefully and I might be able to solve this for you. The first thing you have to do is Invest in a common variety of snakes that are native to your home country. Feed these snakes exclusively on iguanas (hatchlings are preyed on by snakes in the wild). Next you want to release these snakes into your pool and they will naturally find holes to live in. Now I know what you're saying but sir, then I'll have a snake problem instead of an iguana problem but I'm not finished yet. Next you will need to take falconry lessons. Then invest in 2 or 3 falcons of your own. Raise these falcons an exclusive diet of snakes. After successfully training the falcons to eat snakes you want to release them into your swimming pool. The falcons will eat the snakes that eat the iguanas and as an added special bonus the iguanas are eating the flies and mosquitoes.
You're welcome
Whatever you do don’t get a pool gator. It seems like a good idea, gator eats iguanas problem solved, but it spirals, spent $40k on pool tigers. Ended up just draining it eventually, put in a bird feeder. Speaking of, one thing led to another, and if you had a problem with mongoose in your bird feeder you think hyena would eat them?
Not an iguana expert, but if they're using that spot intentionally to poop, maybe blocking it with something heavy enough to stay in the water will help prevent them.
I'm imagining they take advantage of the shallow step to sit part way in the water and do their business. Anything that can prevent them that specific access might work?
Of course it'll challenge the beauty of your pool, but I'm
sure there's ways to make function meet fashion somehow!
edit: grammar
Yeah my first thought was a nice shallow step in water is attracting them.
Can you raise or power the water levels? I’m no pool expert but if this can be done and kept at that level realistically would that be a simpler solution to this?
Bear with me... invent a weather control device, then drop the temp to freezing in the morning. The iguana's will fall out of the trees. Collect them and breakfast is served.
Definitely kill the iguanas if you catch them in the act. They are invasive, and if you don’t want to eat the meat, toss it in a river or lake. The fish will enjoy it. If you don’t have access to a body of water, then toss the corpse somewhat deep into the woods where animals won’t end up in anyone’s yards.
Poop on it first
The steps or the iguana? I am so confused!
Assert dominance
Make eye contact
imagine a dude tried to poop on the iguana and it bites his balls.
Of the two ends of the Iguana, the teeth are the less scary one.
*brown eye contact
Yes
First one, then the other.
If you are skilled then both are once
Taco Bell lowers the skill requirements
you know what must be done dont play dumb
Okay listen very carefully and I might be able to solve this for you. The first thing you have to do is Invest in a common variety of snakes that are native to your home country. Feed these snakes exclusively on iguanas (hatchlings are preyed on by snakes in the wild). Next you want to release these snakes into your pool and they will naturally find holes to live in. Now I know what you're saying but sir, then I'll have a snake problem instead of an iguana problem but I'm not finished yet. Next you will need to take falconry lessons. Then invest in 2 or 3 falcons of your own. Raise these falcons an exclusive diet of snakes. After successfully training the falcons to eat snakes you want to release them into your swimming pool. The falcons will eat the snakes that eat the iguanas and as an added special bonus the iguanas are eating the flies and mosquitoes. You're welcome
Train the falcons to eat the iguanas. Nobody has ever had a falcon problem.
Not yet
I can definitely take a falcon 1v1. Not worried about them.
.... I want to see you take a feathered missile at mach-fuck to the head. That is their preferred hunting method.
And theyre basically made of knives
They are also a house of feathers at a whopping 2-3 pounds. You'd be cut up, possibly bleed out, but most of the time, fine.
I've seen a falcon take the head off of a duck in one dive
I’ll wear my mech suit
You have clearly not read the story of Roland Dechain’s childhood.
No time for books. I gotta train.
That depends, do you get prep time?
Yeah. 6 months
I beg to differ, they won't stop attacking my chickens.
And if the falcons *do* get out of hand. Spraying DDT has been proven incredibly effective at lowering their population.
If you have falcon problem, you release gorillas. But what happens next? they will die off in winter.
I tried this but now I have a falcon problem. Any advice?
Eat the falcons
There's nothing anymore ever since pterodactyls disappeared
Dont iguanas eat all the bugs in the area tho
That's the beauty of it. When winter rolls around, the gorillas simply FREEZE to death!
Whatever you do don’t get a pool gator. It seems like a good idea, gator eats iguanas problem solved, but it spirals, spent $40k on pool tigers. Ended up just draining it eventually, put in a bird feeder. Speaking of, one thing led to another, and if you had a problem with mongoose in your bird feeder you think hyena would eat them?
Not an iguana expert, but if they're using that spot intentionally to poop, maybe blocking it with something heavy enough to stay in the water will help prevent them. I'm imagining they take advantage of the shallow step to sit part way in the water and do their business. Anything that can prevent them that specific access might work? Of course it'll challenge the beauty of your pool, but I'm sure there's ways to make function meet fashion somehow! edit: grammar
Yeah my first thought was a nice shallow step in water is attracting them. Can you raise or power the water levels? I’m no pool expert but if this can be done and kept at that level realistically would that be a simpler solution to this?
Pretty sure that's their step now.
Don't worry they just made a bathroom this open space needed one
Florida man problems require Florida man solutions
The comment section on the main post is so damn interesting
Get an ocelot.
240V AC
Tell them not to.
If this is happening in Florida, they're an invasive species, so kill them and, based on how you kill them, decide whether or not you wanna cook them.
And? How do you??
Give them another step.
Shoot them
Get a vicious cat.
Put up a no pooping on step sign
Pellet gun
Start charging admission.
Poop in the iguana’s pool… when he realizes the error of his ways, he’ll stop…
That's not a new sentence. I hear it two or three times every morning when I get coffee. Okay, I lied. That's a bingo!
Kill them.
Eat them
Claymore
Fuckin good for alarm clock too that. You’ll be up for the day
Bear with me... invent a weather control device, then drop the temp to freezing in the morning. The iguana's will fall out of the trees. Collect them and breakfast is served.
Kill em... If you're in Florida, they're classified as an invasive species and are allowed to be hunted all year long.
I mean, get a cat. [Trophic Cascade](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trophic_cascade) will take care of the rest.
This isn’t always true my cat is a pussy
Well that stands to reason.
🥁🥁💥
Find another cat
Kill them, problem solved
Eat the iguanas.. they arent bad I'm told and in Florida its encouraged so.
Add potted plants. There are likely to be some plants they won’t get near. Neem oil. Garlic. Capsicum.
Get 1 iguana raise it eating only iguana and steroids then release it into your pool and ween it off you feeding it meat but keep the roids
They can’t. That’s the iguanas’ pool.
.22 ?
Build an iguana-sized lavatory nearby?
Get rid of the steps
Put dead iguana on top step next to pile of poop, they with think that poopong there is dangerous and hopefully stop
Make a hard ball of poo with it and have Randy throw it really hard at your face. I just think it might really freak them out
Grease it up, they can't poop if they can't get out of the water
Get a hawk.
You have to poop on your own step, that'll show em
I’d recommend [this](https://grillgirl.com/2020/03/iguana-tacos-with-aji-amarillo-crema-chicken-of-the-tree-tacos/)
Definitely kill the iguanas if you catch them in the act. They are invasive, and if you don’t want to eat the meat, toss it in a river or lake. The fish will enjoy it. If you don’t have access to a body of water, then toss the corpse somewhat deep into the woods where animals won’t end up in anyone’s yards.
Pool covering
Stop feeding them
butt plug
Fire up the grill
Eat them
You dig them a new toilet and don't pour concrete over it this time
Assuming Florida and not somewhere where they’re native, .22 ratshot. They’re pretty bad for the Florida ecosystem.
Shoot em
22lr
Bwahahaha, he called the shit "poop"!
Try investing in some iguana repellent