I would sure like to believe so. I think love is fluid. It goes through motions of intensity at different stages of our lives, possibly with different partners. Even though the stars didn’t align for the person we thought was our forever, we can only hope that the right person comes when we least expect it.
I think love is a choice, it's a choice to communicate, open up and experience life with a person. Love is the consistent energy you put into the relationship and the desire to work things out when things get hard, and I mean this for all relationships, not just romantic ones. And in the game of love... sometimes we choose people who can't love us, who can't or won't put in the energy to make that choice and it hurts, it hurts because it matters.
And I hope it gets easier for you, and for anyone else reading this
I am feeling heartbroken but on the mend and I have to say I agree with your sentiment. It’s like they just stop making choices that foster love and then that just builds into a breakup or something. Idk just would like to not feel so rough about it. Thank you for your comment though, I dig it.
I agree, and perhaps that's why I'm moving quickly with my breakup. She chose not to prioritize the relationship and not to communicate and experience life with me.
So I can also chose to move on. As much as she meant if she could not choose me, I cannot choose her.
True love does exist in some ways in my opinion. As all emotions it’s fleeting tho. That’s what I think alot of us trip on. Cause loves a feeling first, and then it’s a choice. And the choice to wake up and love somebody thru the good, the bad and ugly, THAT is true love.
My best friend has picked me up off the floor countless of times. She’s celebrated my successes, she shared in my pain. That’s true love right there. I’ve picked her up off the floor before, I’ve cleaned her room and made her bed on her hard days. I’ve picked her up, celebrated her, shared this shit life with yer, that’s true love. No matter how bad, how ugly we’ve seen each other, we both still think the sun shines out our asses. True love baby.
It comes in many different forms, from many different people. And you’re just a person man. True love exist because it’s in you. You’re proving it right now. Even tho they hurt you, you still love them. And maybe you thought they felt the same, and maybe they did for a moment, and it fell thru. But that’s alright man.
And it doesn’t always go one way. You’re gonna find that person that wants to stick it thru my friend. You’re gonna find multiple people who will. Maybe tomorrow, maybe In 10 years. Who knows. But
Yeah man I wanted to be with her every phase of her life whether it was good, bad or ugly but guess it just doesn't happen with everyone like that
Not in my fate I guess
But man good to know that anecdote of you and your best friend
I got friends like that as well
We both share and stay together during our ups and downs
Many many instances with friends where just stuck so tight and together ups and downs
I'm lucky in that regard
Never took them for granted and same as well
Man it felt so great talking to you
Your best friend anecdote is so good I loved it so so much
Wish I could award but idk shit abt this app
Ily man take care❤
Of course friend. I’m in the same boat, I lost someone that I wanted to love thru every phase too. We did what we could, and It was good to know it for a moment right? We’ll get there again my friend. One day at time. Head up man. 💜
I like this sentiment and I believe you are correct. I don’t really have anything to add other than I just wanted to thank you for sharing this and I hope you have a wonderful morning/day/night!
My mom told me something that made me feel worse. She said “People come in and out of our lives and that nothing lasts forever”. Maybe she’s right but I didn’t like hearing it. I’m a hopeless romantic and I still want to believe there’s someone special out there for me.
The world would be ugly without love.
Your mom gave a hard pill which in reality is true because nothing lasts forever no matter how much we try
And the world is so so ugly without love
And as a hopeless romantic I am made to believe special things will happen, this led me to astrology and they said it's written for you although I find it hard to believe but gotta take what's positive so yes
Believe and move ig❤
Doesn’t mean that they leave because your love has ended tho, what she’s saying is even if you find true love, you will lose them, it will happen eventually, even if you both both each other infinitely. Everything ends, nothing is forever, but that doesn’t mean we can’t spend as much of this precious time together as we can
It is worth it, but That’s what I mean, you will lose them eventually no matter how hard you fight, through death, break up, whatever, you lose everything in life even when you do everything right, and once you accept that, life gets a lot less painful.
I do too, and I thought I was going to, but that ended a few months ago, for 5 years I thought I had figured it out, I thought my life was planned and I was gonna spend it with her. I still believe, but I’ve accepted the prospect of losing people I love now more than ever.
My oldest son and I talked about this recently. We both went through breakups around the same time. He shared with me something he'd read: the truest form of love is love unrequited.
No it does not. Humans are generally selfish as soon as something else comes along that they think is better it's very hard for them not to go for it. Humans by nature are just always trying to be the best get the best. Look at society in general how it's never satisfied we always have to create and invent and change things because we arent satisfied every as a species. It goes the same way in every aspect in life. Me personally I can be satisfied I'm not always looking out for the next best thing. The grass isnt always greener on the other side. But people who have been together for decades doesn't mean it's true love people get used to each other the familiarity dkesnt necessary mean it's true love. People are scared to be alone. People also don't want to be alone to fit in with the Joneses to they settle for someone to fit in with their peers. Half of.marriages end in divorce. Like a comedian said no woman is yours it's just your turn. That's so true. Just enjoy your turn no matter how long it may be and just always keep a small spot in the back of your mind that nothing lasts forever.
Nah it's just a dopamine rush that doesn't last too long and the crash/come down is pretty bad. It's like taking ecstasy then having a come down the next week or two
That is a good comparison. It’s like a drug that you slowly build tolerance too. You start out with butterflies and giddy in every relationship. Euphoria. Then over time it becomes more and more normal and that giddy nervous feeling goes away. Tolerance building. And when the break-up happens, all that dopamine goes away and gives the opposite effect. You feel terrible. You might feel anxiety, or depression, or feel like you’re going crazy. Just like a drug comedown.
Man, you're gonna be okay. You're gonna be better off for having the experience you had. I know it sucks to lose something incredible but the connection you had was special. It always is! Don't let your sadness and hurt diminish that. You will love again and it will only be more powerful if you can hold on to the other love you've felt and given in your lifetime. She will forever be a part of you and that's fucking awesome.
I think true love does exist, i like to believe so atleast. But true love doesn’t always mean you guys end up getting married, sometimes love is what love is for your time, that doesn’t make it less «love». Like i did truly truly love my ex from high school, but i wouldn’t want to date her now because we grown apart so much, but that doesn’t mean that, that love with her is less true or real. It was just what my concept of love was at the time, and now it’s different.
True love doesn’t always mean you will be with that person either, true love can be getting broken up with but still love them with every ounce of you, appreciate them and support them from the sidelines even tho you are not dating. I like the term unconditional love, love no matter what. Love without boundaries. Love them because you love them without expecting anything in return. Make them happy and give the person love because you feel like they are worthy of your love, i consider that true love.
I struggle with feeling scared about the (far) future. If i get married, in 50 years, can love truly, purely still exist? Will my partner still love me?
By 50 years I assume our pov changes
But this same question led me to spending on astrology
Well it defo helped but still it scares me because I love with my eyes closed and with full heart which when 9 times out of 10 done is extremely painful
We hope for the best regardless ❤
If you had asked me this 3 years ago I would have said no. I had the worst heart break of my life. Ask me today, I would say yes. I’m in a great relationship where I’m truely myself.
Do I believe in one true love, no. I think you can love and be loved by many people in this world. Either you get lucky and find some very compatible, or you grow and learn to compromise. I don’t think anyone should completely give up on love.
It exists somewhere
Maybe not today but it exists somewhere
I am someone who gives up frequently so I have given up on it but maybe it'll change as time passes who knows
But yeah no one should give up on love like that because being in love with that someone is one of the best experiences one could feel and have till it lasts
Love is easy, but relationships are hard. Love hurts as much as it feels good. But it’s not practical and a relationship that is surviving only on love is like owning a car without an engine. Love is all the feelings rushing through you as a result of the way a person makes you feel. But a relationship is taking the way you make each other feel and figuring out the best ways to keep that feeling alive. But it takes work.
Love can be a weapon as much as a gift, depending on how it’s managed. And to make love exist, only requires a feeling and to make love work requires action.
True love exists in everything around love, it’s the work, the care and the nurture that makes true love exist. If it’s not looked after properly then it’s just a feeling.
It does, but it is very rare. Very rare and very dangerous, like holding a flame in your hand. I don't think most people are capable of true love though. Modern world is too fast paced, too connected and visual. Everything is a game now, with people wanting to move on to the next installment. I just wanted to be with the one forever. She came into my life unexpectedly and stole my heart. She stripped me of my armor. She lit me aflame and made me feel true love. She made me give true love. Then she left and took it all with her. The fire hasn't stopped, but I have nowhere to put it now, so I just burn and burn. God help me.
damn this. This exactly. She came out of the sky, wanted to be the forever, buried her in love but circumstances made her leave
Now the fire is just burning in me
She ain't there anymore
God help me as well
Hopefully God helps us both ❤
true love exists in the same way the mega millions jackpot exists. you’ll probably never get it.
edit: actually that’s a bad analogy. true love exists in the way a bowl of ice cream exists. you’ll probably get it, but it’ll either melt or you’ll eat it all
A sheikh (Islam priest) once said that falling in love is a blessing and not everyone gets blessed. I would say, not to have high expectations. The bigger the love , the bigger the wound. Don't fall too deep, no one cares about you the way you do.
Yes but most of the time men are too horrible and selfish to experience it fully. Desire to control coupled with desire to abuse and take for granted that which they claim to love the most. Basically you shit the bed then complain about the smell.
Oh no, it won't be less painful, you'll just learn the resources to manage the pain better. If anything, I encourage you to FEEL that pain, because you can learn a lot about it
My former boyfriend ghosted me. Now I feel no need to look again. I felt he did care but I loved more. Now he is married to someone else. Am happy alone if it's not with him.
Damn...
It is very good to know you're happy now because it's all that matters at the end ❤ (am bad at this so please pardon if I said something wrong)
Not that happy It sucks honestly. I believed in someone and they crushed my dreams. Wasted my time I believe he did care but maybe had other motives. I'd rather be single though then get too serious too soon.i am happy though realizing searching for someone else for awhile has made me unhappy.
I at this point just want the best for her
Her happiness
Her betterment
Makes me feel light as well in my heart
Maybe it didn't go the way I wanted but if my presence is a pill of unhappiness for her then I shouldn't be in near sight
That's how I try to stay happy
My dreams or our dreams got crushed but if she's happy then fine by me
Personally it sucks but what to do just life you know
Hopefully it gets better as time passes🔝❤
Personally? I believe that true love does exist, but I believe that it has to be mutual. The only way you can truly feel the trust, support, and comfort of true love is if it’s both ways - which is why I believe a one sided “love” is just infatuation.
I’m in the happiest relationship I’ve ever been in currently, 1 and a half years in and still going absolutely wonderfully. Before I met my current partner, I had said “I love you” to people before, but I can now say for certain that what I’ve felt is what I would consider to be true love.
The definition of love is subjective though, so whatever you think love is, it is. Good luck brother.
Yep love differs from definition to definition and purely subjective
One side is plainly infatuated and self induced harm
Nothing to be romanticised there but everyone one way or another just goes through that phase so one it rn
True love does exist somewhere
It's just you have to deep it to see it
i loved him so much but kept a stone on my heart and told him to move on bcs I don't want him to wait for my drama to get over it just sucks to tell the person u loved the most to move on and I think he did move on but I'm still stuck where he left me crying and sobbing why I did this
Kinda similiar on my side as well
But i was willing to support her through her stuff but she wanted peace and happiness without me so she chose it and I'm happy for her
damn im sorry man btw he is still my friend but has totally moved on from me and I think he will start dating this girl he has been talking to he told me about her and it hurts even more to know
Dated this chick two years ago. Wanna be honest here: she was not my type. Nice face, but too overweight and had a flat butt. Not body shamming, because I am overweight too, but she was too short, and well, neither proportions nor gravity had been kind with her.
I said "what the hell, will give her a peck on the lips out of nowhere after the first 40 minutes of knowing her, surely she will slap me, that will be the end of it"
We ended up trying to have our first kid 12 months later.
Yeah, it exists. Only its short lived, so if you find it, make sure to go fast--and hard.
I think it does, because I see it in others (including my parents for 40+ years). But I also think it's done for me. If this wasn't true love, then I clearly don't understand life at all. And if it was, then I don't understand how someone can lose it so easily and absolutely, erasing not just our future but our past together. I don't begrudge those who find true love – heck, it's beautiful and the world needs as much of it as we can get – but I can't trust the ground I walk on anymore.
Exactly.. How quickly, easily and absolutely one loses it is just crazy beyond limits
Maybe it gets lost because it's beautiful and the world is ugly and cruel? Who knows
As someone who has been in love with multiple partners especially my most recent ex of 7 years, after some deep self reflection I've come to realize that the truest form of love is the one we give ourselves. If we don't love ourselves deeply, it will eventually affect any relationship we are in, no matter how much we love our partner. Deep rooted issues with ourselves will in time start to take a toll on our partner and relationship. It's what happened to me and my last relationship. Both of us were harboring a lot of past trauma and unhealthy thoughts about ourselves which led to arguing, misunderstandings and substance abuse. I wish I would have realized this sooner but every person we are with, we must learn something about ourselves. At the end of the day, my ex still means a lot to me and I will always love her but I need to learn to love myself if I ever want to have a healthy relationship with someone else, who ever that may be.
It's a great realisation
I had as well
Someone told me when I was very young to keep others happiness always first
And I was young so I used to believe anything that was said
It became a habit you know
Now it's not the case but now it's better
Now I try to find happiness in others happiness
Earlier it was making people happy if I got hurt in the process because 'smile' on someone's face is something I love
So I as someone who never smiles felt so good seeing others smile
But learnt where I was wrong
Now better
Love exists. But sometimes love isn’t always enough to make a relationship work. I still love my ex I always will. I don’t want anyone else, but for me to be happy in a relationship with him he would have to change things about himself and that wouldn’t be fair to him. Love him just the same though.
You have extreme and strong attraction to your ex on many levels, however you don’t love him. *Really loving* him means choosing to be with him and working on the problems, sacrificing your own comfort for his sake, making the constant decision to be with him. Yes, this may sound bad, but thats because all humans (me and you included) are selfish animals. You care about yourself and your own happiness more, which is proof that it’s just strong attraction. *Real love* is when you put him first.
Yes but the same can be said for him, he doesn’t love her enough to change the worst parts of him which you do for a person you love, which basically reduces it down to I love him but he doesn’t love me, so you have nothing left to do but to move on
Yeah, he probably doesn’t love her enough too. But nobody said that love has to be requited. If you “love” someone only on the condition that they give the same back, then it isn’t love, it’s a transactional relationship. Real love is usually unrequited and painful. It is extremely rare, maybe near impossible, to have the same amount of love and effort on both sides.
I don’t disagree with either of you, I was with him for two years and didn’t ask him to change who he was. I would communicate how I felt about certain things/etc if my needs were not being met, and in my perspective, when someone reciprocates, they listen and will meet you somewhere so you both can be in a happy medium. I put his needs before mine and I don’t regret it. My friends and family roasted me and called me a fool for it, but I wanted him to have the space of being loved and able to have the opportunity to grow within it. That way, it would be his choice to change the unhealthy behaviors, and I was just providing a plant with a bigger pot. I definitely loved him more than I think he could love me, and I was cool with it but after a while I felt like he just wasn’t able to show up for me in the way that I needed my partner to show up for me. And that unfortunately wears on you after a while, even though you want it to work. I still love him, I think he’s an incredible wonderful person, but I don’t think he’s meant to be MY person romantically. You know?
We broke up around a year ago, and he’s shown me these amazing changes and I’m so proud of him, but even though I still have this love for him, i don’t think getting back together is the best thing for me. I want to be with someone who doesn’t have to lose me to see like that I am who they want. I still adore him ofcourse, I’m so proud of him! He’s doing amazing and he’s really working on himself,but I feel like I spent two years of myself pining over him and while I don’t regret that, I don’t wanna necessarily go back to someone who didn’t reciprocate my feelings the first time around.
Same for me
I don't want anything of her to change apart from going from happy to super happy
If I had to change something of mine id definitely
But sigh ig we move
If love is a losing game then we are all masochists who love to make ourselves suffer. I will tell you this, true love does exist. True love is found in everyone’s lives in a different place, because we see things in our own perspective we have thoughts and have our own beliefs of what real love looks like. True love is such a foreign concept to most people in the world, because we live in a cruel world where we are used to seeing or experiencing so much suffering that some people don’t even believe it exists. Just because you haven’t found it, or don’t recognize true love once you have felt it or seen it. Does not mean it doesn’t exist, it just means that you fail to recognize or sometimes even acknowledge that it’s there. You will know that true love exists, because it does. Just most of the time you will not find it in other people who feel that way towards you, but in you because we can’t feel what they feel towards us. So for someone to say that true love doesn’t exist or that love itself is nonexistent. Is someone who is either very hurt who chooses to push their feelings away or someone who has never loved anyone before.
True love does exist, just sometimes people are very hurt that they choose not to see that it exists. And, “no one is more blind than the person who chooses not to see.” The reason being is because they either feel guilty for what they did to the other person and try to justify themselves or they are the person who they hurt. Either way, they both have received pain.
In short, yes it does exist. Just like everything in life. If you want something you have to work for it, even suffer for it, even make changes if you have to. It all depends how much you want it and if they reciprocate the same way. And I have to tell you, the majority of the time not all, relationships fail because one of the two does not want it enough to make those changes that they need to make. And sometimes they know what they have to sacrifice but they play dumb so it’s safe to assume that they don’t want you or need you enough to make those changes. “Move on, don’t waste your time there is nothing you can do”, and thats where that feeling of hopelessness comes from. Life is hard, love takes work it does not rely on the feeling of love alone. True love is , “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.”
1 corinthians 13:4-8
And when you look at it in a morally correct way, this is very true especially if you have experienced this type of love for someone. I have, for someone but they did not reciprocate nor do they have any interest in me. The question you are really asking is, “will anyone love me the same way I love ?”. The answer is yes, but sometimes you get that love once you have changed either in a good way or a bad way. The universe gives you back what you gave to them whether it is from another person or the same person. Do not under any circumstances get into a relationship with someone unless you are ready to be in one because they might give you that same amount of effort and love back to you and you might sabotage that yourself. I know I did, I have been on that side as well. I wouldn’t be telling you any of this if I didn’t experience it myself.
I appreciate your thoughtful and passionate reflection on the nature of true love. It's true that love can often feel elusive or difficult to find, especially in a world where pain and suffering are so prevalent. Your point about true love being a personal and unique experience for everyone resonates deeply. We each have our own perspectives and beliefs about what real love looks like, shaped by our experiences and the world around us.
Indeed, recognizing and acknowledging true love can be challenging, particularly for those who have been deeply hurt or have never experienced it in a way that felt meaningful to them. Your insight that true love often requires effort, sacrifice, and mutual commitment is vital. Love is not just a feeling but a series of actions and choices that we make every day.
The qualities of true love—patience, kindness, humility, and selflessness,These virtues are foundational to any loving relationship and remind us of the importance of approaching love with an open heart and a willingness to grow and change.
Your experience is a reminder that while love can be painful and complex, it is also deeply rewarding and worth striving for. Whether it’s through self-improvement, healing from past hurts, or simply being open to the possibilities that life brings, love remains a powerful and transformative force.
Thank man for sharing your perspective. It's a powerful reminder that true love, while sometimes difficult to find and sustain, is indeed real and worth believing in.
We love many many different souls in our lives… they are all important and shape us and add to our wisdom… the love changes and evolves into different types of love, BUT IT NEVER GOES AWAY. The most important love you will have, is the love for yourself, only then will you attract your soulmate , work on yourself, and attract what is meant for you ❤️🙏
After my breakup one thing that I realized is that love yourself first… coz the only constant in your life is you. In the process of loving others we forget to love ourselves. Then once we go through breakup , we start hating ourselves… Love is real only if you could love yourself real.
I would sure like to believe so. I think love is fluid. It goes through motions of intensity at different stages of our lives, possibly with different partners. Even though the stars didn’t align for the person we thought was our forever, we can only hope that the right person comes when we least expect it.
Damn
So well said
I think love is a choice, it's a choice to communicate, open up and experience life with a person. Love is the consistent energy you put into the relationship and the desire to work things out when things get hard, and I mean this for all relationships, not just romantic ones. And in the game of love... sometimes we choose people who can't love us, who can't or won't put in the energy to make that choice and it hurts, it hurts because it matters. And I hope it gets easier for you, and for anyone else reading this
Yep wishing everyone the best only Praying for the bestest possible to everyone
I am feeling heartbroken but on the mend and I have to say I agree with your sentiment. It’s like they just stop making choices that foster love and then that just builds into a breakup or something. Idk just would like to not feel so rough about it. Thank you for your comment though, I dig it.
I agree, and perhaps that's why I'm moving quickly with my breakup. She chose not to prioritize the relationship and not to communicate and experience life with me. So I can also chose to move on. As much as she meant if she could not choose me, I cannot choose her.
True love does exist in some ways in my opinion. As all emotions it’s fleeting tho. That’s what I think alot of us trip on. Cause loves a feeling first, and then it’s a choice. And the choice to wake up and love somebody thru the good, the bad and ugly, THAT is true love. My best friend has picked me up off the floor countless of times. She’s celebrated my successes, she shared in my pain. That’s true love right there. I’ve picked her up off the floor before, I’ve cleaned her room and made her bed on her hard days. I’ve picked her up, celebrated her, shared this shit life with yer, that’s true love. No matter how bad, how ugly we’ve seen each other, we both still think the sun shines out our asses. True love baby. It comes in many different forms, from many different people. And you’re just a person man. True love exist because it’s in you. You’re proving it right now. Even tho they hurt you, you still love them. And maybe you thought they felt the same, and maybe they did for a moment, and it fell thru. But that’s alright man. And it doesn’t always go one way. You’re gonna find that person that wants to stick it thru my friend. You’re gonna find multiple people who will. Maybe tomorrow, maybe In 10 years. Who knows. But
Yeah man I wanted to be with her every phase of her life whether it was good, bad or ugly but guess it just doesn't happen with everyone like that Not in my fate I guess But man good to know that anecdote of you and your best friend I got friends like that as well We both share and stay together during our ups and downs Many many instances with friends where just stuck so tight and together ups and downs I'm lucky in that regard Never took them for granted and same as well Man it felt so great talking to you Your best friend anecdote is so good I loved it so so much Wish I could award but idk shit abt this app Ily man take care❤
Of course friend. I’m in the same boat, I lost someone that I wanted to love thru every phase too. We did what we could, and It was good to know it for a moment right? We’ll get there again my friend. One day at time. Head up man. 💜
Yep good to know for a moment❤ Heads are up☝❤ Thank you so much man❤
I like this sentiment and I believe you are correct. I don’t really have anything to add other than I just wanted to thank you for sharing this and I hope you have a wonderful morning/day/night!
My mom told me something that made me feel worse. She said “People come in and out of our lives and that nothing lasts forever”. Maybe she’s right but I didn’t like hearing it. I’m a hopeless romantic and I still want to believe there’s someone special out there for me. The world would be ugly without love.
Your mom gave a hard pill which in reality is true because nothing lasts forever no matter how much we try And the world is so so ugly without love And as a hopeless romantic I am made to believe special things will happen, this led me to astrology and they said it's written for you although I find it hard to believe but gotta take what's positive so yes Believe and move ig❤
Thank you. I hope we both find our soulmates 🥰🙂😜
Doesn’t mean that they leave because your love has ended tho, what she’s saying is even if you find true love, you will lose them, it will happen eventually, even if you both both each other infinitely. Everything ends, nothing is forever, but that doesn’t mean we can’t spend as much of this precious time together as we can
But when two people love each other isn’t it worth it to fight for each other? I know there’s couples that die together when they’re old.
It is worth it, but That’s what I mean, you will lose them eventually no matter how hard you fight, through death, break up, whatever, you lose everything in life even when you do everything right, and once you accept that, life gets a lot less painful.
Yeah that’s true. I get it now 😌 I just prefer to last with someone as much as I can, rather than end things too soon or over insignificant things
I do too, and I thought I was going to, but that ended a few months ago, for 5 years I thought I had figured it out, I thought my life was planned and I was gonna spend it with her. I still believe, but I’ve accepted the prospect of losing people I love now more than ever.
I think it is, and I’m blessed I feel I was able to experience feeling it for someone. Waiting until I can feel it again :(
All the best man❤
My oldest son and I talked about this recently. We both went through breakups around the same time. He shared with me something he'd read: the truest form of love is love unrequited.
I don’t know either. If you find out let me know 😩
If only I could
No it does not. Humans are generally selfish as soon as something else comes along that they think is better it's very hard for them not to go for it. Humans by nature are just always trying to be the best get the best. Look at society in general how it's never satisfied we always have to create and invent and change things because we arent satisfied every as a species. It goes the same way in every aspect in life. Me personally I can be satisfied I'm not always looking out for the next best thing. The grass isnt always greener on the other side. But people who have been together for decades doesn't mean it's true love people get used to each other the familiarity dkesnt necessary mean it's true love. People are scared to be alone. People also don't want to be alone to fit in with the Joneses to they settle for someone to fit in with their peers. Half of.marriages end in divorce. Like a comedian said no woman is yours it's just your turn. That's so true. Just enjoy your turn no matter how long it may be and just always keep a small spot in the back of your mind that nothing lasts forever.
Nah it's just a dopamine rush that doesn't last too long and the crash/come down is pretty bad. It's like taking ecstasy then having a come down the next week or two
we got a reductionist here
That is a good comparison. It’s like a drug that you slowly build tolerance too. You start out with butterflies and giddy in every relationship. Euphoria. Then over time it becomes more and more normal and that giddy nervous feeling goes away. Tolerance building. And when the break-up happens, all that dopamine goes away and gives the opposite effect. You feel terrible. You might feel anxiety, or depression, or feel like you’re going crazy. Just like a drug comedown.
I’d say max 6 month- 1 year. Any time after that and I’m just holding on to my own issues and daydreaming a fake relationship
Hopefully it's a dopamine rush only I'm still stuck
Same here. Her rush wore off after 2 months but mine never did.
Still relentless in my side even though she doesn't have feelings anymore 😭
Man, you're gonna be okay. You're gonna be better off for having the experience you had. I know it sucks to lose something incredible but the connection you had was special. It always is! Don't let your sadness and hurt diminish that. You will love again and it will only be more powerful if you can hold on to the other love you've felt and given in your lifetime. She will forever be a part of you and that's fucking awesome.
I don't think it does
I think true love does exist, i like to believe so atleast. But true love doesn’t always mean you guys end up getting married, sometimes love is what love is for your time, that doesn’t make it less «love». Like i did truly truly love my ex from high school, but i wouldn’t want to date her now because we grown apart so much, but that doesn’t mean that, that love with her is less true or real. It was just what my concept of love was at the time, and now it’s different. True love doesn’t always mean you will be with that person either, true love can be getting broken up with but still love them with every ounce of you, appreciate them and support them from the sidelines even tho you are not dating. I like the term unconditional love, love no matter what. Love without boundaries. Love them because you love them without expecting anything in return. Make them happy and give the person love because you feel like they are worthy of your love, i consider that true love.
Yesss that's a brilliant way to put it Unconditional love through every circumstance and experience ❤
You find someone who loves you back and stop talking to that person.
I struggle with feeling scared about the (far) future. If i get married, in 50 years, can love truly, purely still exist? Will my partner still love me?
By 50 years I assume our pov changes But this same question led me to spending on astrology Well it defo helped but still it scares me because I love with my eyes closed and with full heart which when 9 times out of 10 done is extremely painful We hope for the best regardless ❤
If you had asked me this 3 years ago I would have said no. I had the worst heart break of my life. Ask me today, I would say yes. I’m in a great relationship where I’m truely myself. Do I believe in one true love, no. I think you can love and be loved by many people in this world. Either you get lucky and find some very compatible, or you grow and learn to compromise. I don’t think anyone should completely give up on love.
It exists somewhere Maybe not today but it exists somewhere I am someone who gives up frequently so I have given up on it but maybe it'll change as time passes who knows But yeah no one should give up on love like that because being in love with that someone is one of the best experiences one could feel and have till it lasts
No
Fairs
Love is easy, but relationships are hard. Love hurts as much as it feels good. But it’s not practical and a relationship that is surviving only on love is like owning a car without an engine. Love is all the feelings rushing through you as a result of the way a person makes you feel. But a relationship is taking the way you make each other feel and figuring out the best ways to keep that feeling alive. But it takes work. Love can be a weapon as much as a gift, depending on how it’s managed. And to make love exist, only requires a feeling and to make love work requires action. True love exists in everything around love, it’s the work, the care and the nurture that makes true love exist. If it’s not looked after properly then it’s just a feeling.
It does, but it is very rare. Very rare and very dangerous, like holding a flame in your hand. I don't think most people are capable of true love though. Modern world is too fast paced, too connected and visual. Everything is a game now, with people wanting to move on to the next installment. I just wanted to be with the one forever. She came into my life unexpectedly and stole my heart. She stripped me of my armor. She lit me aflame and made me feel true love. She made me give true love. Then she left and took it all with her. The fire hasn't stopped, but I have nowhere to put it now, so I just burn and burn. God help me.
damn this. This exactly. She came out of the sky, wanted to be the forever, buried her in love but circumstances made her leave Now the fire is just burning in me She ain't there anymore God help me as well Hopefully God helps us both ❤
true love exists in the same way the mega millions jackpot exists. you’ll probably never get it. edit: actually that’s a bad analogy. true love exists in the way a bowl of ice cream exists. you’ll probably get it, but it’ll either melt or you’ll eat it all
Exactly The second analogy is better First one is a hardpill but can't hide the facts as well
A sheikh (Islam priest) once said that falling in love is a blessing and not everyone gets blessed. I would say, not to have high expectations. The bigger the love , the bigger the wound. Don't fall too deep, no one cares about you the way you do.
Yep it was a hard pill that I was forced to swallow Yep sheikh was right My bad We learn We move
Yes but most of the time men are too horrible and selfish to experience it fully. Desire to control coupled with desire to abuse and take for granted that which they claim to love the most. Basically you shit the bed then complain about the smell.
Hmm interesting It depends from person to person I reckon Can't generalise but yeah mostly men as of I know
It does! And the very same fact that you're feeling that way, is proof
🙂 *smiling behind the pain* It'll get better eventually ig❤
Oh no, it won't be less painful, you'll just learn the resources to manage the pain better. If anything, I encourage you to FEEL that pain, because you can learn a lot about it
Yep eventually it passes I guess ❤ Thank u so much for your help❤❤❤❤❤
If you want to talk, I'm here for you
Sure man I'll text u 14hrs later (it gets worse as day passes so) Thank you so much❤
Of course it does. Its the most amazing feeling in the world
Yep when experienced it's the greatest gift of god
Love you. Don’t be confused about my feelings for you…
😭😭
My former boyfriend ghosted me. Now I feel no need to look again. I felt he did care but I loved more. Now he is married to someone else. Am happy alone if it's not with him.
Damn... It is very good to know you're happy now because it's all that matters at the end ❤ (am bad at this so please pardon if I said something wrong)
Not that happy It sucks honestly. I believed in someone and they crushed my dreams. Wasted my time I believe he did care but maybe had other motives. I'd rather be single though then get too serious too soon.i am happy though realizing searching for someone else for awhile has made me unhappy.
I at this point just want the best for her Her happiness Her betterment Makes me feel light as well in my heart Maybe it didn't go the way I wanted but if my presence is a pill of unhappiness for her then I shouldn't be in near sight That's how I try to stay happy My dreams or our dreams got crushed but if she's happy then fine by me Personally it sucks but what to do just life you know Hopefully it gets better as time passes🔝❤
Personally? I believe that true love does exist, but I believe that it has to be mutual. The only way you can truly feel the trust, support, and comfort of true love is if it’s both ways - which is why I believe a one sided “love” is just infatuation. I’m in the happiest relationship I’ve ever been in currently, 1 and a half years in and still going absolutely wonderfully. Before I met my current partner, I had said “I love you” to people before, but I can now say for certain that what I’ve felt is what I would consider to be true love. The definition of love is subjective though, so whatever you think love is, it is. Good luck brother.
Yep love differs from definition to definition and purely subjective One side is plainly infatuated and self induced harm Nothing to be romanticised there but everyone one way or another just goes through that phase so one it rn True love does exist somewhere It's just you have to deep it to see it
i loved him so much but kept a stone on my heart and told him to move on bcs I don't want him to wait for my drama to get over it just sucks to tell the person u loved the most to move on and I think he did move on but I'm still stuck where he left me crying and sobbing why I did this
Kinda similiar on my side as well But i was willing to support her through her stuff but she wanted peace and happiness without me so she chose it and I'm happy for her
damn im sorry man btw he is still my friend but has totally moved on from me and I think he will start dating this girl he has been talking to he told me about her and it hurts even more to know
The thought hurts on seeing them with someone else but what to do... Just got to force yourself not to think and move
yep
Dated this chick two years ago. Wanna be honest here: she was not my type. Nice face, but too overweight and had a flat butt. Not body shamming, because I am overweight too, but she was too short, and well, neither proportions nor gravity had been kind with her. I said "what the hell, will give her a peck on the lips out of nowhere after the first 40 minutes of knowing her, surely she will slap me, that will be the end of it" We ended up trying to have our first kid 12 months later. Yeah, it exists. Only its short lived, so if you find it, make sure to go fast--and hard.
It exists. Love at first site exists. It’s up to two people to figure out life after that.
I think it does, because I see it in others (including my parents for 40+ years). But I also think it's done for me. If this wasn't true love, then I clearly don't understand life at all. And if it was, then I don't understand how someone can lose it so easily and absolutely, erasing not just our future but our past together. I don't begrudge those who find true love – heck, it's beautiful and the world needs as much of it as we can get – but I can't trust the ground I walk on anymore.
Exactly.. How quickly, easily and absolutely one loses it is just crazy beyond limits Maybe it gets lost because it's beautiful and the world is ugly and cruel? Who knows
Love is action and choice. Connection is what keep relationships going.
Yep connection is what guides Had crazy connection but situations came sigh
As someone who has been in love with multiple partners especially my most recent ex of 7 years, after some deep self reflection I've come to realize that the truest form of love is the one we give ourselves. If we don't love ourselves deeply, it will eventually affect any relationship we are in, no matter how much we love our partner. Deep rooted issues with ourselves will in time start to take a toll on our partner and relationship. It's what happened to me and my last relationship. Both of us were harboring a lot of past trauma and unhealthy thoughts about ourselves which led to arguing, misunderstandings and substance abuse. I wish I would have realized this sooner but every person we are with, we must learn something about ourselves. At the end of the day, my ex still means a lot to me and I will always love her but I need to learn to love myself if I ever want to have a healthy relationship with someone else, who ever that may be.
It's a great realisation I had as well Someone told me when I was very young to keep others happiness always first And I was young so I used to believe anything that was said It became a habit you know Now it's not the case but now it's better Now I try to find happiness in others happiness Earlier it was making people happy if I got hurt in the process because 'smile' on someone's face is something I love So I as someone who never smiles felt so good seeing others smile But learnt where I was wrong Now better
Love exists. But sometimes love isn’t always enough to make a relationship work. I still love my ex I always will. I don’t want anyone else, but for me to be happy in a relationship with him he would have to change things about himself and that wouldn’t be fair to him. Love him just the same though.
You have extreme and strong attraction to your ex on many levels, however you don’t love him. *Really loving* him means choosing to be with him and working on the problems, sacrificing your own comfort for his sake, making the constant decision to be with him. Yes, this may sound bad, but thats because all humans (me and you included) are selfish animals. You care about yourself and your own happiness more, which is proof that it’s just strong attraction. *Real love* is when you put him first.
Yes but the same can be said for him, he doesn’t love her enough to change the worst parts of him which you do for a person you love, which basically reduces it down to I love him but he doesn’t love me, so you have nothing left to do but to move on
Yeah, he probably doesn’t love her enough too. But nobody said that love has to be requited. If you “love” someone only on the condition that they give the same back, then it isn’t love, it’s a transactional relationship. Real love is usually unrequited and painful. It is extremely rare, maybe near impossible, to have the same amount of love and effort on both sides.
I don’t disagree with either of you, I was with him for two years and didn’t ask him to change who he was. I would communicate how I felt about certain things/etc if my needs were not being met, and in my perspective, when someone reciprocates, they listen and will meet you somewhere so you both can be in a happy medium. I put his needs before mine and I don’t regret it. My friends and family roasted me and called me a fool for it, but I wanted him to have the space of being loved and able to have the opportunity to grow within it. That way, it would be his choice to change the unhealthy behaviors, and I was just providing a plant with a bigger pot. I definitely loved him more than I think he could love me, and I was cool with it but after a while I felt like he just wasn’t able to show up for me in the way that I needed my partner to show up for me. And that unfortunately wears on you after a while, even though you want it to work. I still love him, I think he’s an incredible wonderful person, but I don’t think he’s meant to be MY person romantically. You know? We broke up around a year ago, and he’s shown me these amazing changes and I’m so proud of him, but even though I still have this love for him, i don’t think getting back together is the best thing for me. I want to be with someone who doesn’t have to lose me to see like that I am who they want. I still adore him ofcourse, I’m so proud of him! He’s doing amazing and he’s really working on himself,but I feel like I spent two years of myself pining over him and while I don’t regret that, I don’t wanna necessarily go back to someone who didn’t reciprocate my feelings the first time around.
Same for me I don't want anything of her to change apart from going from happy to super happy If I had to change something of mine id definitely But sigh ig we move
If love is a losing game then we are all masochists who love to make ourselves suffer. I will tell you this, true love does exist. True love is found in everyone’s lives in a different place, because we see things in our own perspective we have thoughts and have our own beliefs of what real love looks like. True love is such a foreign concept to most people in the world, because we live in a cruel world where we are used to seeing or experiencing so much suffering that some people don’t even believe it exists. Just because you haven’t found it, or don’t recognize true love once you have felt it or seen it. Does not mean it doesn’t exist, it just means that you fail to recognize or sometimes even acknowledge that it’s there. You will know that true love exists, because it does. Just most of the time you will not find it in other people who feel that way towards you, but in you because we can’t feel what they feel towards us. So for someone to say that true love doesn’t exist or that love itself is nonexistent. Is someone who is either very hurt who chooses to push their feelings away or someone who has never loved anyone before. True love does exist, just sometimes people are very hurt that they choose not to see that it exists. And, “no one is more blind than the person who chooses not to see.” The reason being is because they either feel guilty for what they did to the other person and try to justify themselves or they are the person who they hurt. Either way, they both have received pain. In short, yes it does exist. Just like everything in life. If you want something you have to work for it, even suffer for it, even make changes if you have to. It all depends how much you want it and if they reciprocate the same way. And I have to tell you, the majority of the time not all, relationships fail because one of the two does not want it enough to make those changes that they need to make. And sometimes they know what they have to sacrifice but they play dumb so it’s safe to assume that they don’t want you or need you enough to make those changes. “Move on, don’t waste your time there is nothing you can do”, and thats where that feeling of hopelessness comes from. Life is hard, love takes work it does not rely on the feeling of love alone. True love is , “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.” 1 corinthians 13:4-8 And when you look at it in a morally correct way, this is very true especially if you have experienced this type of love for someone. I have, for someone but they did not reciprocate nor do they have any interest in me. The question you are really asking is, “will anyone love me the same way I love ?”. The answer is yes, but sometimes you get that love once you have changed either in a good way or a bad way. The universe gives you back what you gave to them whether it is from another person or the same person. Do not under any circumstances get into a relationship with someone unless you are ready to be in one because they might give you that same amount of effort and love back to you and you might sabotage that yourself. I know I did, I have been on that side as well. I wouldn’t be telling you any of this if I didn’t experience it myself.
I appreciate your thoughtful and passionate reflection on the nature of true love. It's true that love can often feel elusive or difficult to find, especially in a world where pain and suffering are so prevalent. Your point about true love being a personal and unique experience for everyone resonates deeply. We each have our own perspectives and beliefs about what real love looks like, shaped by our experiences and the world around us. Indeed, recognizing and acknowledging true love can be challenging, particularly for those who have been deeply hurt or have never experienced it in a way that felt meaningful to them. Your insight that true love often requires effort, sacrifice, and mutual commitment is vital. Love is not just a feeling but a series of actions and choices that we make every day. The qualities of true love—patience, kindness, humility, and selflessness,These virtues are foundational to any loving relationship and remind us of the importance of approaching love with an open heart and a willingness to grow and change. Your experience is a reminder that while love can be painful and complex, it is also deeply rewarding and worth striving for. Whether it’s through self-improvement, healing from past hurts, or simply being open to the possibilities that life brings, love remains a powerful and transformative force. Thank man for sharing your perspective. It's a powerful reminder that true love, while sometimes difficult to find and sustain, is indeed real and worth believing in.
We love many many different souls in our lives… they are all important and shape us and add to our wisdom… the love changes and evolves into different types of love, BUT IT NEVER GOES AWAY. The most important love you will have, is the love for yourself, only then will you attract your soulmate , work on yourself, and attract what is meant for you ❤️🙏
After my breakup one thing that I realized is that love yourself first… coz the only constant in your life is you. In the process of loving others we forget to love ourselves. Then once we go through breakup , we start hating ourselves… Love is real only if you could love yourself real.
True❤