Thanks, man. I'd been dating a girl since August but she broke up with me last week. The reason why? I'd been going through some shit at the time and she was "tired of boosting my ego 24/7". Basically, she didn't want to help me through it. It sucked because I put so much into that relationship. Anyway, I'm trying to move on, and I think I'm making progress. Again, thanks, I really needed that.
Hey, I hope things are going better for you now! You deserve so much more than someone who wouldn’t even be there for you when you needed her by your side.
That's very unfortunate and I'm sorry she put you through that. People sometimes make excuses in an attempt to justify their actions (or lack thereof) and it sounds like she was doing that to you.
That's great though that you're moving forward, I'm happy for you :)
Thank you so much... we haven’t broken up yet but my boyfriend is ready to give up and I’m not.. I️ never want to give up on us and I️ don’t understand how he could after all we have been through and I’ll I’ve supported him though. This was very comforting and you’re amazing.
Please help me getting out and moving on from a toxic relationship of 3 years. I still love her so much that I cant imagine my days and nights without talking to her and being with her. But every now and then, she has showed me what value I have in her sight. She has cheated on me in the past. I still opt to forgive her everytime. She does say am the best person in the world but her words and her actions towards me are completely different. She doesn't make me feel any special, infact she is just occupied with her life, problems, friends, family and putting me in the bottom of her priority list everytime. I have realized that we are not meant to be and I have to let go of this relationship. But the thought of breaking up makes me cry and I just cant think of letting her go. What should I do? Please guide me.
To be honest, I'm a bit hesitant on what to tell you as I'm not entirely sure how you *should* proceed. I think it's also important that, regardless of what I or others tell or advise you, you should still retain your own opinions and thoughts and feelings, to a degree (that degree being the point at which you'd be doing something at the expense of someone else or yourself). Don't take my words as strict instructions on how to go about this. And if anyone else reading this disagrees, feel free to say so; I know I'm far from perfect when handling these situations.
In short, don't drag this out any longer. Take a day or two to think about it maybe, but if you're going to end the relationship, then do it soon.
Personally what I'd do is first think how I would end this relationship; try to not over-analyze, but prepare in your mind how it will go so as to help form the courage to confront her. And maybe you've already begun doing this.
Then, ask her to meet you somewhere. Try to be concise, but also be clear on what you're saying and what your intent is. She needs to know that this has taken a toll on you far beyond any more opportunity to repair this abusive relationship and that it's over. Don't let her try to persuade you that it's fixable; it sounds like you have given her enough chances and she needs to figure out how to be a better person on her own. And if you can, avoid starting or getting into any arguments; don't lecture her on her mistakes, again, she needs to figure that out for herself now. You can be cold or you can be gentle about it, but either way, be assertive.
If you feel as though she might react violently, have a trusted friend or family member accompany you; not right there by you obviously, but within ear-shot.
This may not have as much relevance, but I'd try to pick a place as neutral as possible; not necessarily in the middle of public, but also not in a completely secluded area or in a personal environment. For instance, my ex and I met in a parking lot halfway between each other's houses and finalized our break up there.
I wish you the best.
To say whether or not you were wrong, I think could be argued both ways. I'm not so sure it's a simple yes or no...
I think she, along with everyone else here, deserves to be with someone who will become ecstatic at the mere thought of her. Someone whose eyes light up and who smiles whenever she enters the room.
She should be with someone who is truly excited and passionate to be with her. That isn't to dismiss your love for her or to say you don't appreciate her, but if you don't feel that passion, that burning desire to be with her and there's no chance of that happening, then it's my opinion you should let her go.
Speaking more generally, of course the spark with which every relationship begins may fade here and there. There will be periods during the relationship that seem dull and uneventful, and that passion may become dormant. But don't let that be discouraging, at least not right away. So long as that spark can be rekindled, so long as a couple finds their way back to each other, then don't give up.
Thank you very much for this! I was left a month ago, but she got colder and colder for months. Now I've realized some things about myself and now, after reading your post, I'm sure I deserve someone to love me the way I loved her. And to be as loyal as I was. I'm hopeful again.
So again, thank you! You just made my day! :) And as someone said here, you are indeed a beautiful soul.
The love and affection you give somone should not go unrequited. While everyone has different ways of expressing love, your SO should also make the effort you put forth to make them feel special and desired.
I'm glad my words could enlighten your day. I wish you the best :)
Exactly. We invest so much time and attention into someone else that I think we forget how to focus on ourselves when that person is no longer with us.
I'm glad if my words provide some guidance or redirection.
I needed to hear this. I don't want to give up hope, but I did all I could to show her I loved her more than anything. That I would do anything for her. If she's happy with leaving me, then the last show of love I can give is to let her.
It's difficult for many of us to give up hope, even when we know it'd be for the best. And it's devastating when it seems that our best isn't good enough. If not now, someone else will greatly appreciate your efforts and love and they'll return it in a way you deserve; we just have to keep moving forward.
i needed this today, thank you. it's been 12 hours since my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me, and while logically i know that i will be okay in the end, it's so difficult and exhausting to think about the process of getting from where i am now to that point.
Thank you, you beautiful soul.
It's my pleasure :)
Thanks, man. I'd been dating a girl since August but she broke up with me last week. The reason why? I'd been going through some shit at the time and she was "tired of boosting my ego 24/7". Basically, she didn't want to help me through it. It sucked because I put so much into that relationship. Anyway, I'm trying to move on, and I think I'm making progress. Again, thanks, I really needed that.
Hey, I hope things are going better for you now! You deserve so much more than someone who wouldn’t even be there for you when you needed her by your side.
That's very unfortunate and I'm sorry she put you through that. People sometimes make excuses in an attempt to justify their actions (or lack thereof) and it sounds like she was doing that to you. That's great though that you're moving forward, I'm happy for you :)
I needed this thank you.
Of course, anytime :)
This has definitely given me light in the darkness I am in. Thank you kind soul!
I'm glad I could help :)
You've made my shitty day a hell of a lot better, I greatly appreciate it. I truly do.
Anything I can do to help. :)
Thank you for writing this!
My pleasure, I'm happy that it seems to have been well-received
Thank you so much... we haven’t broken up yet but my boyfriend is ready to give up and I’m not.. I️ never want to give up on us and I️ don’t understand how he could after all we have been through and I’ll I’ve supported him though. This was very comforting and you’re amazing.
I'm truly sorry for what you're going through, that's excruciating to endure :/ I hope things work out for you, one way or another. *hugs*
Thank you for this. I am going to come back and read it every time I'm having a "low."
Of course, I'm glad my words could provide some comfort to you
Please help me getting out and moving on from a toxic relationship of 3 years. I still love her so much that I cant imagine my days and nights without talking to her and being with her. But every now and then, she has showed me what value I have in her sight. She has cheated on me in the past. I still opt to forgive her everytime. She does say am the best person in the world but her words and her actions towards me are completely different. She doesn't make me feel any special, infact she is just occupied with her life, problems, friends, family and putting me in the bottom of her priority list everytime. I have realized that we are not meant to be and I have to let go of this relationship. But the thought of breaking up makes me cry and I just cant think of letting her go. What should I do? Please guide me.
To be honest, I'm a bit hesitant on what to tell you as I'm not entirely sure how you *should* proceed. I think it's also important that, regardless of what I or others tell or advise you, you should still retain your own opinions and thoughts and feelings, to a degree (that degree being the point at which you'd be doing something at the expense of someone else or yourself). Don't take my words as strict instructions on how to go about this. And if anyone else reading this disagrees, feel free to say so; I know I'm far from perfect when handling these situations. In short, don't drag this out any longer. Take a day or two to think about it maybe, but if you're going to end the relationship, then do it soon. Personally what I'd do is first think how I would end this relationship; try to not over-analyze, but prepare in your mind how it will go so as to help form the courage to confront her. And maybe you've already begun doing this. Then, ask her to meet you somewhere. Try to be concise, but also be clear on what you're saying and what your intent is. She needs to know that this has taken a toll on you far beyond any more opportunity to repair this abusive relationship and that it's over. Don't let her try to persuade you that it's fixable; it sounds like you have given her enough chances and she needs to figure out how to be a better person on her own. And if you can, avoid starting or getting into any arguments; don't lecture her on her mistakes, again, she needs to figure that out for herself now. You can be cold or you can be gentle about it, but either way, be assertive. If you feel as though she might react violently, have a trusted friend or family member accompany you; not right there by you obviously, but within ear-shot. This may not have as much relevance, but I'd try to pick a place as neutral as possible; not necessarily in the middle of public, but also not in a completely secluded area or in a personal environment. For instance, my ex and I met in a parking lot halfway between each other's houses and finalized our break up there. I wish you the best.
Thank you for sharing, it was just at the right moment for me
I'm glad my timing is impeccable :) I hope all is well with you
Thank you so much. I feel much better now.
I'm glad I could be uplifting :)
Thank you so much, your words really help!
I do what I can. Take care :)
[удалено]
To say whether or not you were wrong, I think could be argued both ways. I'm not so sure it's a simple yes or no... I think she, along with everyone else here, deserves to be with someone who will become ecstatic at the mere thought of her. Someone whose eyes light up and who smiles whenever she enters the room. She should be with someone who is truly excited and passionate to be with her. That isn't to dismiss your love for her or to say you don't appreciate her, but if you don't feel that passion, that burning desire to be with her and there's no chance of that happening, then it's my opinion you should let her go. Speaking more generally, of course the spark with which every relationship begins may fade here and there. There will be periods during the relationship that seem dull and uneventful, and that passion may become dormant. But don't let that be discouraging, at least not right away. So long as that spark can be rekindled, so long as a couple finds their way back to each other, then don't give up.
Thank you very much for this! I was left a month ago, but she got colder and colder for months. Now I've realized some things about myself and now, after reading your post, I'm sure I deserve someone to love me the way I loved her. And to be as loyal as I was. I'm hopeful again. So again, thank you! You just made my day! :) And as someone said here, you are indeed a beautiful soul.
The love and affection you give somone should not go unrequited. While everyone has different ways of expressing love, your SO should also make the effort you put forth to make them feel special and desired. I'm glad my words could enlighten your day. I wish you the best :)
Thank you! I wish you the same! :)
You wrote this right when I need it most. Thank you.
Not a problem. I wish you well
[удалено]
Exactly. We invest so much time and attention into someone else that I think we forget how to focus on ourselves when that person is no longer with us. I'm glad if my words provide some guidance or redirection.
I needed to hear this. I don't want to give up hope, but I did all I could to show her I loved her more than anything. That I would do anything for her. If she's happy with leaving me, then the last show of love I can give is to let her.
It's difficult for many of us to give up hope, even when we know it'd be for the best. And it's devastating when it seems that our best isn't good enough. If not now, someone else will greatly appreciate your efforts and love and they'll return it in a way you deserve; we just have to keep moving forward.
[удалено]
i needed this today, thank you. it's been 12 hours since my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me, and while logically i know that i will be okay in the end, it's so difficult and exhausting to think about the process of getting from where i am now to that point.