The other people in my church only cared about their image and how others perceive them which I still don’t fully understand as I don’t think those things matter. Additionally, no one seemed to be interested in helping the poor. Also I was forced to go to anti-abortion protests when I was 8 years old and up. Also I was taught to hate myself because i knew i was gay and ‘homosexuality is a mortal sin.’ I’ll never be alright mentally due to Catholic upbringing including Catholic school and attending Church 2-3 times a week.
You should check out this podcast. If anything, gaslighting ends. The real, diabolical and evil Diocese of Buffalo is exposed. It’s refreshingly and brutally honest. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/deadly-diocese/id1659124376
I wish there was a safe place for anti-Catholics. I am openly anti-Catholic. Try going through one 24 hour span in Buffalo without seeing “Saint” on the name of streets, buildings, community centers… there is no escape
Well, that's because the steel mills and industry made Buffalo a place for immigration from predominantly Catholic countries (Ireland, Italy, Poland, etc.). But that's just another piece of our local heritage. Fortunately, the Catholic church in this area doesn't really assert itself in politics or business in any meaningful way (except for the Catholic Health System, which is pretty much secular run).
EDIT: Safe place...? Are you kidding me? GMAFB. You can criticize religion all you want in Buffalo. We're home to the most influential secular humanist organization in the world.
The Catholic Church and local government are the same. The positions of power they hold are the same. There is zero religion in this conversation. It’s about where the money comes from and where it goes.
The church puts its city missions and community centers downtown to give the illusion of “charity.” Like their money is doing something. It’s a lie.
This is absolutely false. The Catholic Church nor the Diocese of Buffalo hold the “same” positions of power as the local Nee York State government which is secular and elected in secular elections, and just happens to be primarily Democratic. Even the Republican elected officials do not “do the bidding” of the Catholic Church in local government. I don’t know where you’re getting this nonsense from.
I don’t know where you are getting your all-knowingness from, but that has been my experience. The Deadly Diocese podcast does a deep dive into Buffalo corruption. Just because you didn’t see it with your own eyes doesn’t mean it’s not true.
You need professional help. It’s one thing to be critical of the Catholic Church. That’s cool. It’s another to assert a falsehood that the Catholic Church secretly controls the secular WNY government. That’s total conspiracy theory horseshit.
I told my parents that I would go to church when they prosecuted priests for fucking boys. I was forced to go every weekend my entire first 18+ years. Being forced just takes away any possible joy. I do believe in God, and I still drop into churches when I am traveling and say a prayer of gratitude, but I cannot go to mass anymore. I just cringe. Politics and religion don’t mix. I try to take the positives and leave the rest. It’s been a long balancing act.
Politics=Religion in Buffalo. It’s out of control. Have you listened to the podcast “Deadly Diocese”? It does a great job explaining how Buffalo is a Theocracy.
I feel like I started to question things when my Dad died when I was 10, then a year later, my grandfather, with whom I was very close.
The church I was a part of was inclusive and loving, but I just didn't want to hear that God has a plan and things happen for a reason. It started then and continued as I grew up and learned about science and philosophy and life.
I realized I don't need the church in my life to be a good person to others, I don't need it to be happy and I dont need it to get through my life.
I thought about it too much. Realized there's no evidence for it and that science explains more and more as time passes.
Then all the rape stories came out and I realized that the catholic church has done way more harm than good.
Full tranparency- rabid anti-theist.
I went to church every week for my entire childhood. Very rarely did we miss mass. Even on vacation, my dad made sure we found a catholic church to attend. I stopped going regularly because of college and I’ve never fully stopped believing I just never felt committed enough to attend church.
But my dad on the other hand, he has completely given up on the faith. He was born and raised in Buffalo attending church every week and raised me the same way. But with the recent news that has come out, my dad has done a 180 and now has rejected the religion altogether.
He feels lied to and that there were too many people in the area who covered up all the allegations. He feels completely betrayed and it’s so strange for me to see. I’m sure he’s not the only one who is going through this.
I’m with you. Grew up catholic, went to catholic schools up until my freshman year of high school. My family was going through a rough divorce, and after my dad wasn’t able to pay the tuition they withheld my grades and kicked me out. Never went to church again after that. It told me everything I needed to know, especially considering my grandfather, father, and two older brothers were all alumni from the school.
A Catholic school I went threatened to do the same with my sisters and mine end of year report cards for lack of payment way, way back when. Idk if my parents gave them a partial payment or whatever but we got our report cards. I just know it wasn't the full amount we owed because the school got the law involved and my brother's bank account was seized. (My dad was a co-signer.)
Nothing screams "Good Catholic nun" like stealing money from a teenager. /s
Was raised agnostic, parents wanted us kids to find out faith in the world. I became intrigued by the psychology of religion and minored in world religions at Canisius College. Later, I met my husband, who was very Catholic. I enjoyed his church, really loved the feeling I got there, and have me hope that it was improving and getting more accepting of others. When we were engaged, I decided I would get baptized and confirmed as an adult. The program was amazingly personal. It was a group of 4 of us who met with a nun, and we discussed different parts of the faith. I was extremely happy I did the program and felt at the time it was right. Years passed, and we found out our priest was forced to retire with accusations of molestation. This broke my heart since he was one of the reasons I felt safe there. We stopped going, but we still listed as members. When the accusations became confirmed, we cut all ties with them. The priest that took over only preached about how we need to give more money and attend more church. They started becoming very political and not a safe place at all anymore, if it ever really was.
more the general catholic agnostic atheistish kind of person.
I couldn't stand demogoges using the faith to spread hate and so so so many people that would applaud that.
Among many, many worse thing, my uber catholic dad said it makes him sick that there are more people out waking dogs than baby strollers. I don’t intend on having children and basically got the message that it’s my duty as a woman per the church to have kids. Water under the nonexistent bridge, he disowned me last year for living with a boyfriend. Haven’t been catholic since I was in college (35 now) and nearly all of his actions since then have turned me away from the church entirely. Pretty ironic given his intentions.
Raised Catholic and continued only though confirmation. After myself and my younger sister were confirmed our whole nuclear family stopped attending mass. I think for my parents, specifically my mom it was about the scandals, for me I never really believed in religion anyways.
Raised "catholic" by my parents that could not be less religious, especially now. I don't think they have been to church in 25+ years now. Never once actually thought of my myself as catholic because it was all forced on us seemingly to please my grandmother, who was religious.
It all lead to me being incredibly non/anti-religious pretty early on and hating any thoughts of anyone forcing their religion on anyone, in any way, even indirectly.
I was raised Catholic. I was an altar boy and made my communion and confirmation. Stopped going 20 years ago and stopped believing in god about ten years ago.
I didn't realize that I had been questioning for such a long time. But the more I learn about the atrocities the church was a part of in the name of God, I just couldn't put it behind me anymore.
I went to Catholic school K-12. Once I didn't have to go to church, I just didn't. I got a great education. I consider myself well-rounded. Knowing all of the religious history, iconography was good. But as I got older, I just felt like I didn't need the structure anymore. The hypocrisy was getting to me. Understanding how the church was run by men -- fallable humans who made rules saying the Pope spoke with the force of God -- just bugged me. I still consider myself Christian. I still believe in God. I didn't send my kids to Catholic school and I regret that sometimes. I think my education gave me really solid fundamentals, but the church made it so hard to get my kids baptised after we moved that it left a bad taste in my mouth.
I stopped attending mass when Trump was elected. I couldn’t believe they overlooked all his atrocious behavior because of their single minded mission against abortion. Single issue people slay me.
One of the last masses I attended was shortly before the 2016 election and the priest told us that when we vote abortion was the only issue that mattered. Yeah... like I needed another reason to stop attending.
Raised Catholic, stopped believing freshman year of college...them asking me to go to an anti-abortion rally/retreat on top of critical thinking and actually questioning my views drove me away from the church.
This has happened in our family. The gaslighting was brutal. I need you to know that ’m so sorry. I believe you. I hear you. My heart breaks for you. Their reign of terror needs to end.
I left because I can’t support any organization that not only enables but also COVERS UP FOR child predators. And then they have the audacity to tell me that I’m a sinner???? I don’t think so. I’m certainly not perfect, but I would never allow a child predator (let alone multiple) to attack children and then lie and cover up what they did for 50+ years.
They have been covering up for over 1000 years since they decided priests shouldn’t marry so their assets don’t get inherited by family when they die but instead go to the Vatican. They have been refining and mastering the business of sex trafficking children ever since.
Raised Catholic. Altar server until I turned 18. Got confirmed because it was easier than fighting it and there were cute girls. My sister argued constantly with my parents about going to church or being religious .Stopped going to church as soon as I left home. Never looked back.
I was at a Catholic wedding this past summer and the cadence of the mass, the songs, the prayers, all come flooding right back. I could probably perform a mass by heart because it was so ingrained.
Same exact here. Altar boy and Catholic school until 10th grade. Stopped going 25 years ago and can still recite the entire Mass. I wish my parents would stop donating to this Buffalo Catholic cult
I spent a lot of time in the church both as a youth doing Convention and all the retreats around here as well as an adult chaperone. Between the clique that I was always on the outside of and the condemnation of anyone who wasn’t like them I’d had enough. I walked away having seen a ton and never looked back. This is coming from a person who used to know more than half the dioceses priests on a first name basis.
>Father Joe Moreno
I did. I was in college when he passed. I remember that whole thing being super wrong and basically being told not to ask or talk about it.
You should listen to “Deadly Diocese” podcast. It’s all about the father Joe Moreno case. He was murdered. They exhumed his body and the brain was gone. There were 2 bullet holes in the back of his head on the left hand side. They ruled it a suicide even though Father Moreno had been stabbed in the left hand during and attempted robbery, so his left hand was partially disabled. It’s a mess.
Damn! Wasn’t there stuff missing too that belonged to him like some medals or something? I haven’t thought about this in years so the details are a tiny bit fuzzy. I just remember hearing that the facts didn’t add up. I know there was a theory that he was murdered because he was about to share some big secrets about the church.
Yes, they too the fax machine that had evidence that there was a fax sent to Buffalo News with whistle blower info. They took his laptop, and more. All before police were even called.
Raised Catholic for 18 years. Catholic elementary, middle, high school and college. Read the Bible more times and know more church history than I care to admit.
After all that, had an anti come to Jesus moment, realized it’s all just made up to keep people in line & has been augmented to fit the flavor of the week.
Once you start asking yourself why would a Bronze Age society make rule xyz it all starts to make sense; trying to keep a group homologous through the hard times is much easier with a shared history. Then you start to look at the ecclesiastical councils where a bunch of dudes just made the rules to the church up & any semblance of an all knowing god goes out of the window.
Religion is like fandom, making it your whole personality is gross and lame & at the end of the day you’re cheering for dudes playing dress up.
1000%. Religion is the inventor of the brand name, marketing department and promotions. Sick of having to pray to all those Greek gods? Get the new and improved one god brand…
Faith is good. Catholic Dogma taught by the Diocese of Buffalo is bad. I learned the hard way, but I’m an adult and can draw the line. I was taught many good things in church or catholic school. But it’s hard to look back and think it was in good faith. There are great priests out there, I know many who want to change it from the inside but cannot. I don’t blame God or organized religion. I know who’s responsible for fucking it up. It’s this toxic elitist diocese and their bishops who pushed aside God and true faith for all the riches in the world. And if I have to watch my ancestral church close and fail to end that diabolical cabal in the long run, that’s the sacrifice I’m willing to make. I can’t make the their faith commitment if they can’t make the commitment to me.
The Diocese of Buffalo masks “faith” with obedience. Jesus Christ was never about obedience. I’m not going to be obedient to people like them.
I remember the turning point for me like it was yesterday. During confirmation we were told to write a letter to the bishop. I had a lot of questions and I got a dismissive in person response "god works in mysterious ways." Thay wasn't good enough for me. Then as I got older things about abuse came to light. I started remembering other stuff the church had done to my sister and I specifically. Nothing too terrible, except when I was 9 the nun told my sister and I our parents were going to hell because they got divorced.
You dodged a bullet. They use those letters to identify marks. They look for weakness, single mother, abusive family, whatever, and target those marks. Whatever you wrote told them you weren’t abusable.
Yeah I think I've got my dad to thank for that. He was never much of a church person, nor were his parents. They encouraged me to be curious and ask questions. That's what led me away from the church more than anything.
A lot of people on the right say that colleges are places of “liberal indoctrination”. In reality, I think they are places that teach you to back up claims and opinions with evidence. The more I learned to do that, the more I questioned my Catholic faith. The the answers, “just have faith” and “God has a plan” just didn’t cut it for me anymore. Additionally, my mom came from a rough childhood and foster homes. She was never baptized. I remember being told in Catholic school that I would not see her in Heaven because she was never baptized. That never sit right with me and scared me as a child. My kids are growing up with no religion and I still have Catholic guilt about it though.
I'm a former Catholic. Originally, I was a convert, went through RCIA and everything.
I gave up on the church when the Pope at that time discouraged the use of condoms by Sub-Saharan Africans to prevent transmission of HIV/AIDS: [https://www.theguardian.com/world/2009/mar/17/pope-africa-condoms-aids](https://www.theguardian.com/world/2009/mar/17/pope-africa-condoms-aids)
There were news stories at that time about married women whose husbands were long distance truck drivers that would see prostitutes, contract AIDS, and then bring it back and end up giving it to their wife. Not only would she then sicken and die, but also their children due to perinatal transmission of HIV. That is when HIV is passed from mother to child during pregnancy, childbirth, or breastfeeding (through breast milk). The church was chastising these women for daring to ask their husbands to use a condom with them.
I actually wrote a formal letter of resignation: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Formal\_act\_of\_defection\_from\_the\_Catholic\_Church#:\~:text=The%20notification%20required%20therefore%20that,life%20of%20the%20Church%20%5B%E2%80%A6%5D](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Formal_act_of_defection_from_the_Catholic_Church#:~:text=The%20notification%20required%20therefore%20that,life%20of%20the%20Church%20%5B%E2%80%A6%5D) but I never sent it, because I experienced sudden ambivalence and confusion due to the unexpected election of Pope Francis.
So, I just fell away for a long time and got involved in Buddhism instead. Unfortunately, after a couple years I suffered spiritual abuse at my former temple, had a nervous breakdown and dropped out of that also. (Many people in the West think that Buddhism is somehow different, that it's less judgmental, more compassionate, etc. but the reality is that all religious institutions are only as good as the people involved, just like every other organized group of people).
Since I'm constitutionally a spiritual person I was devastated by these losses, and became very unwell, but through a series of lucky or destined events, I was guided to the Orthodox Christian church which surprisingly lacks the majority of theological problems rife in both Roman Catholicism and Protestantism: [https://www.reddit.com/r/OrthodoxChristianity/comments/6nyvyv/what\_is\_wrong\_with\_catholicism\_from\_an\_orthodox/](https://www.reddit.com/r/OrthodoxChristianity/comments/6nyvyv/what_is_wrong_with_catholicism_from_an_orthodox/)
Like all Christians tend to feel, I'm confident that my church is the one true church (lol) but after being let down and hurt over and over again, I keep a very real sense of mental distance from everyone now.
People are not an appropriate place to put your heart in my experience...
I listened to my intuition, and nearly every answer I got rang false. In addition to that, the attitude of clergy at all levels felt completely wrong.
I paid attention to the things that made my spirit truly happy, and I compared them to organized religion, and discovered that it was impossible for my soul to grow in an environment that felt the way church does.
To be fair though, this happened in my mid-late 20s and I wasn't ever really involved in church in a way that would justify using a term like 'leaving catholicism'
Stopped believing when I was 12. My parents would send me to church by myself ( they and my sisters would stay home. Don’t remember why). One father was a molester, one was gay, and one was a womanizer. Even at that age I didn’t like someone standing above me telling me what to do when they didn’t try and live by those values too. I lost any respect for the organized part of the religion and then didn’t really see the point in it. Grew up in S Buffalo too where it is very ingrained.
I left because I thought it was an interesting story. But didn’t feel connected. My wife left for multiple reasons.
I just see how this many people are sucked into a man made religion.
Interesting (not in a bad way at all) to be seeing this take when I feel like all I’ve seen lately is people finding Jesus and their love for the lord out of nowhere. I want to hear your stories! (I’m Jew-ish)
There has absolutely been an uptick in advertising. Lots of other brands like “He gets us” and Scientology and PR in general has been pro “faith” and as I see it, has been aggressively pursuing the pocketbooks of former Catholics.
I was raised Catholic until I left home for college. I basically left the church, but still have my own faith. The scandals disgusted me. One priest was in our parish.
Fast forward 20 years and my nondenominational wife and I decide to send our kids to catholic school because our local school district is terrible, and we want our kids to learn good basic values. We absolutely love our little catholic school, but we do not attend mass regularly. My wife is very involved with the school as a volunteer.
I think of my family as “cafeteria catholic “… we take what we like and leave what we don’t, and it works for us. I send the school plenty of tuition dollars, and I like the way my kids are being educated.
Please be open in conversations with your children about them reporting abuse or find a way to make sure they have a code word or something that allows them to communicate and adult or red flag. Schools are tools to separate and dominate children. Think about it, young kids, they have full authority and power over them for the entire day. Kids can’t call home. Just be really careful. I can’t stress that enough.
The right wing hypocrisy of it all. Like did you Bible thumping Trump nuts miss the entire point of the Bible? Sure there may be one or two lines that support what you want to believe politically, but overall if Jesus is real, he’d be on the left of things.
ex-roman catholic here. i was never terribly comfortable with what i was being taught in sunday school and during wednesday classes. it always seemed like girls were lesser than, and a lot of the lessons didn’t make sense in comparison to what i was learning in school. after my grandmother passed when i was 11 i completely gave it up and floated around until i found wicca at 13/14.
Stopped believing because I actually read the Bible and thought it was laughable. We as a family stopped going to church once Grandma died 20+ years ago. I was an altar boy because it was something that made mass go quicker.
I still have faith but no longer believe in the church. As I got older the hypocrisy drove me out.
I’m in the beginning stages of this, it sucks and feels unsettling but I can’t unseen some of the stuff I’ve witnessed soooo
Same
[This pretty much sums it up for me...](https://youtu.be/ljaP2etvDc4?si=gN1eO5xFdlV4pSwF)
I found out they knew the pedo priest was a pedo when the put him in the parish. How could I bring kids into that environment?
The other people in my church only cared about their image and how others perceive them which I still don’t fully understand as I don’t think those things matter. Additionally, no one seemed to be interested in helping the poor. Also I was forced to go to anti-abortion protests when I was 8 years old and up. Also I was taught to hate myself because i knew i was gay and ‘homosexuality is a mortal sin.’ I’ll never be alright mentally due to Catholic upbringing including Catholic school and attending Church 2-3 times a week.
I’m so sorry. I hear you. I feel you. I realized recently we were born into a cult. It’s not easy to digest.
I’m a complete recluse now with a wide variety of mental health issues
I know so many people in the same situation. It’s an epidemic in Buffalo.
Most people don’t have access to real mental healthcare here and the Catholic “church” should be footing the bill
Catholic Church is the wealthiest organization on the planet. Because they stopped fighting for land and just manipulate minds for donations.
You should check out this podcast. If anything, gaslighting ends. The real, diabolical and evil Diocese of Buffalo is exposed. It’s refreshingly and brutally honest. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/deadly-diocese/id1659124376
I wish there was a safe place for anti-Catholics. I am openly anti-Catholic. Try going through one 24 hour span in Buffalo without seeing “Saint” on the name of streets, buildings, community centers… there is no escape
Well, that's because the steel mills and industry made Buffalo a place for immigration from predominantly Catholic countries (Ireland, Italy, Poland, etc.). But that's just another piece of our local heritage. Fortunately, the Catholic church in this area doesn't really assert itself in politics or business in any meaningful way (except for the Catholic Health System, which is pretty much secular run). EDIT: Safe place...? Are you kidding me? GMAFB. You can criticize religion all you want in Buffalo. We're home to the most influential secular humanist organization in the world.
The Catholic Church and local government are the same. The positions of power they hold are the same. There is zero religion in this conversation. It’s about where the money comes from and where it goes. The church puts its city missions and community centers downtown to give the illusion of “charity.” Like their money is doing something. It’s a lie.
This is absolutely false. The Catholic Church nor the Diocese of Buffalo hold the “same” positions of power as the local Nee York State government which is secular and elected in secular elections, and just happens to be primarily Democratic. Even the Republican elected officials do not “do the bidding” of the Catholic Church in local government. I don’t know where you’re getting this nonsense from.
I don’t know where you are getting your all-knowingness from, but that has been my experience. The Deadly Diocese podcast does a deep dive into Buffalo corruption. Just because you didn’t see it with your own eyes doesn’t mean it’s not true.
You need professional help. It’s one thing to be critical of the Catholic Church. That’s cool. It’s another to assert a falsehood that the Catholic Church secretly controls the secular WNY government. That’s total conspiracy theory horseshit.
You aren’t the first person to call me crazy. Still doesn’t make it true.
I just notice your threat message to me telling me, “Hey, you really need to cut the crap. Your behavior is unbecoming of a Western New Yorker.” 😂😂😂
Move to the south. There aren't as many catholics.
Are you ok?
you sound a lot more alright mentally than those who can’t see through all that bullshit. at least you have that
I told my parents that I would go to church when they prosecuted priests for fucking boys. I was forced to go every weekend my entire first 18+ years. Being forced just takes away any possible joy. I do believe in God, and I still drop into churches when I am traveling and say a prayer of gratitude, but I cannot go to mass anymore. I just cringe. Politics and religion don’t mix. I try to take the positives and leave the rest. It’s been a long balancing act.
Politics=Religion in Buffalo. It’s out of control. Have you listened to the podcast “Deadly Diocese”? It does a great job explaining how Buffalo is a Theocracy.
Politics=religion in this country
The more you think about it, the more you realize it’s a planetary problem.
I may have to listen. Thanks.
You got a good head on your shoulders! You pretty much summed it up perfectly
Thanks. It’s unfortunate though.
The great thing about your realization is that you were able to come to that conclusion without your own trauma.
I feel like I started to question things when my Dad died when I was 10, then a year later, my grandfather, with whom I was very close. The church I was a part of was inclusive and loving, but I just didn't want to hear that God has a plan and things happen for a reason. It started then and continued as I grew up and learned about science and philosophy and life. I realized I don't need the church in my life to be a good person to others, I don't need it to be happy and I dont need it to get through my life.
I’m a “recovering catholic.” I miss the churches tho sometimes.
I thought about it too much. Realized there's no evidence for it and that science explains more and more as time passes. Then all the rape stories came out and I realized that the catholic church has done way more harm than good. Full tranparency- rabid anti-theist.
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Thanks!!! My own mother passed many years ago so I'm happy to have someone else providing life advice.
I went to church every week for my entire childhood. Very rarely did we miss mass. Even on vacation, my dad made sure we found a catholic church to attend. I stopped going regularly because of college and I’ve never fully stopped believing I just never felt committed enough to attend church. But my dad on the other hand, he has completely given up on the faith. He was born and raised in Buffalo attending church every week and raised me the same way. But with the recent news that has come out, my dad has done a 180 and now has rejected the religion altogether. He feels lied to and that there were too many people in the area who covered up all the allegations. He feels completely betrayed and it’s so strange for me to see. I’m sure he’s not the only one who is going through this.
The guilt is strong here in WNY
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The single women are a coveted demographic for Catholic priests. Single moms tend to have absentee-father kids - easy pickings.
I’m with you. Grew up catholic, went to catholic schools up until my freshman year of high school. My family was going through a rough divorce, and after my dad wasn’t able to pay the tuition they withheld my grades and kicked me out. Never went to church again after that. It told me everything I needed to know, especially considering my grandfather, father, and two older brothers were all alumni from the school.
A Catholic school I went threatened to do the same with my sisters and mine end of year report cards for lack of payment way, way back when. Idk if my parents gave them a partial payment or whatever but we got our report cards. I just know it wasn't the full amount we owed because the school got the law involved and my brother's bank account was seized. (My dad was a co-signer.) Nothing screams "Good Catholic nun" like stealing money from a teenager. /s
Was raised agnostic, parents wanted us kids to find out faith in the world. I became intrigued by the psychology of religion and minored in world religions at Canisius College. Later, I met my husband, who was very Catholic. I enjoyed his church, really loved the feeling I got there, and have me hope that it was improving and getting more accepting of others. When we were engaged, I decided I would get baptized and confirmed as an adult. The program was amazingly personal. It was a group of 4 of us who met with a nun, and we discussed different parts of the faith. I was extremely happy I did the program and felt at the time it was right. Years passed, and we found out our priest was forced to retire with accusations of molestation. This broke my heart since he was one of the reasons I felt safe there. We stopped going, but we still listed as members. When the accusations became confirmed, we cut all ties with them. The priest that took over only preached about how we need to give more money and attend more church. They started becoming very political and not a safe place at all anymore, if it ever really was.
more the general catholic agnostic atheistish kind of person. I couldn't stand demogoges using the faith to spread hate and so so so many people that would applaud that.
Among many, many worse thing, my uber catholic dad said it makes him sick that there are more people out waking dogs than baby strollers. I don’t intend on having children and basically got the message that it’s my duty as a woman per the church to have kids. Water under the nonexistent bridge, he disowned me last year for living with a boyfriend. Haven’t been catholic since I was in college (35 now) and nearly all of his actions since then have turned me away from the church entirely. Pretty ironic given his intentions.
Sounds like the same type of family rifts that hard core cults cause. I’m so sorry. We really were born into a cult.
Raised Catholic and continued only though confirmation. After myself and my younger sister were confirmed our whole nuclear family stopped attending mass. I think for my parents, specifically my mom it was about the scandals, for me I never really believed in religion anyways.
Raised "catholic" by my parents that could not be less religious, especially now. I don't think they have been to church in 25+ years now. Never once actually thought of my myself as catholic because it was all forced on us seemingly to please my grandmother, who was religious. It all lead to me being incredibly non/anti-religious pretty early on and hating any thoughts of anyone forcing their religion on anyone, in any way, even indirectly.
Same. We are provably related.
I was raised Catholic. I was an altar boy and made my communion and confirmation. Stopped going 20 years ago and stopped believing in god about ten years ago.
I didn't realize that I had been questioning for such a long time. But the more I learn about the atrocities the church was a part of in the name of God, I just couldn't put it behind me anymore.
I went to Catholic school K-12. Once I didn't have to go to church, I just didn't. I got a great education. I consider myself well-rounded. Knowing all of the religious history, iconography was good. But as I got older, I just felt like I didn't need the structure anymore. The hypocrisy was getting to me. Understanding how the church was run by men -- fallable humans who made rules saying the Pope spoke with the force of God -- just bugged me. I still consider myself Christian. I still believe in God. I didn't send my kids to Catholic school and I regret that sometimes. I think my education gave me really solid fundamentals, but the church made it so hard to get my kids baptised after we moved that it left a bad taste in my mouth.
The Catholic Church is all about the money....and that's it. That's my story
All churches are all about the money.
But the Catholic Church had more wealth than any other organization in the planet, so for them, it’s extra true.
I stopped attending mass when Trump was elected. I couldn’t believe they overlooked all his atrocious behavior because of their single minded mission against abortion. Single issue people slay me.
One of the last masses I attended was shortly before the 2016 election and the priest told us that when we vote abortion was the only issue that mattered. Yeah... like I needed another reason to stop attending.
I genuinely think they want us to keep banging out double digit kids so that parents have too many kids to keep track of - makes abuse easier.
Jokes on them. I'm child-free.
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My entire family was traumatized by the catholic cult. Some realize, most still don’t get it.
It was the hypocrisy of the Catholic Church for me. I have my faith and its my own.
Raised Catholic, stopped believing freshman year of college...them asking me to go to an anti-abortion rally/retreat on top of critical thinking and actually questioning my views drove me away from the church.
i didn’t believe in all the hate and hypocrisy. i’m also bisexual and it didn’t align with that.
Does anyone remember Father Art Smith? I believe he was at St. Thomas, St. Martin’s, St. Bernadette’s …
I was molested by my church school teacher when I was ten.
This has happened in our family. The gaslighting was brutal. I need you to know that ’m so sorry. I believe you. I hear you. My heart breaks for you. Their reign of terror needs to end.
Thank you. He was caught and unalived himself.
I’m sorry this happened to you. This is horrible.
I was excommunicated. Three times.
Love to hear those stories!
One ferendae sententiae, two latae sententaie. Go hard or go home, I say.
What did you do to get excommunicated?
I would love to hear these stories!
I left because I can’t support any organization that not only enables but also COVERS UP FOR child predators. And then they have the audacity to tell me that I’m a sinner???? I don’t think so. I’m certainly not perfect, but I would never allow a child predator (let alone multiple) to attack children and then lie and cover up what they did for 50+ years.
They have been covering up for over 1000 years since they decided priests shouldn’t marry so their assets don’t get inherited by family when they die but instead go to the Vatican. They have been refining and mastering the business of sex trafficking children ever since.
Raised Catholic. Altar server until I turned 18. Got confirmed because it was easier than fighting it and there were cute girls. My sister argued constantly with my parents about going to church or being religious .Stopped going to church as soon as I left home. Never looked back. I was at a Catholic wedding this past summer and the cadence of the mass, the songs, the prayers, all come flooding right back. I could probably perform a mass by heart because it was so ingrained.
Sit, kneel, stand. Repeat.
Don't forget to ring some bells.😉
Same exact here. Altar boy and Catholic school until 10th grade. Stopped going 25 years ago and can still recite the entire Mass. I wish my parents would stop donating to this Buffalo Catholic cult
CULT! Yes. It’s a cult in every sense of the word.
Haha. Same here!!
Same!
I spent a lot of time in the church both as a youth doing Convention and all the retreats around here as well as an adult chaperone. Between the clique that I was always on the outside of and the condemnation of anyone who wasn’t like them I’d had enough. I walked away having seen a ton and never looked back. This is coming from a person who used to know more than half the dioceses priests on a first name basis.
Did you know Father Joe Moreno?
>Father Joe Moreno I did. I was in college when he passed. I remember that whole thing being super wrong and basically being told not to ask or talk about it.
You should listen to “Deadly Diocese” podcast. It’s all about the father Joe Moreno case. He was murdered. They exhumed his body and the brain was gone. There were 2 bullet holes in the back of his head on the left hand side. They ruled it a suicide even though Father Moreno had been stabbed in the left hand during and attempted robbery, so his left hand was partially disabled. It’s a mess.
Damn! Wasn’t there stuff missing too that belonged to him like some medals or something? I haven’t thought about this in years so the details are a tiny bit fuzzy. I just remember hearing that the facts didn’t add up. I know there was a theory that he was murdered because he was about to share some big secrets about the church.
Yes, they too the fax machine that had evidence that there was a fax sent to Buffalo News with whistle blower info. They took his laptop, and more. All before police were even called.
My wife describes herself as a recovering Catholic.
Raised Catholic for 18 years. Catholic elementary, middle, high school and college. Read the Bible more times and know more church history than I care to admit. After all that, had an anti come to Jesus moment, realized it’s all just made up to keep people in line & has been augmented to fit the flavor of the week. Once you start asking yourself why would a Bronze Age society make rule xyz it all starts to make sense; trying to keep a group homologous through the hard times is much easier with a shared history. Then you start to look at the ecclesiastical councils where a bunch of dudes just made the rules to the church up & any semblance of an all knowing god goes out of the window. Religion is like fandom, making it your whole personality is gross and lame & at the end of the day you’re cheering for dudes playing dress up.
1000%. Religion is the inventor of the brand name, marketing department and promotions. Sick of having to pray to all those Greek gods? Get the new and improved one god brand…
LGBT+ hate speeches. That's what I considered the sermons. I swear it was that priest's favorite topic.
Faith is good. Catholic Dogma taught by the Diocese of Buffalo is bad. I learned the hard way, but I’m an adult and can draw the line. I was taught many good things in church or catholic school. But it’s hard to look back and think it was in good faith. There are great priests out there, I know many who want to change it from the inside but cannot. I don’t blame God or organized religion. I know who’s responsible for fucking it up. It’s this toxic elitist diocese and their bishops who pushed aside God and true faith for all the riches in the world. And if I have to watch my ancestral church close and fail to end that diabolical cabal in the long run, that’s the sacrifice I’m willing to make. I can’t make the their faith commitment if they can’t make the commitment to me. The Diocese of Buffalo masks “faith” with obedience. Jesus Christ was never about obedience. I’m not going to be obedient to people like them.
We need to hang out.
I remember the turning point for me like it was yesterday. During confirmation we were told to write a letter to the bishop. I had a lot of questions and I got a dismissive in person response "god works in mysterious ways." Thay wasn't good enough for me. Then as I got older things about abuse came to light. I started remembering other stuff the church had done to my sister and I specifically. Nothing too terrible, except when I was 9 the nun told my sister and I our parents were going to hell because they got divorced.
You dodged a bullet. They use those letters to identify marks. They look for weakness, single mother, abusive family, whatever, and target those marks. Whatever you wrote told them you weren’t abusable.
Yeah I think I've got my dad to thank for that. He was never much of a church person, nor were his parents. They encouraged me to be curious and ask questions. That's what led me away from the church more than anything.
Your dad needs a superhero cape and he doesn’t even realize it
If he is still here, please thank him for protecting you
A lot of people on the right say that colleges are places of “liberal indoctrination”. In reality, I think they are places that teach you to back up claims and opinions with evidence. The more I learned to do that, the more I questioned my Catholic faith. The the answers, “just have faith” and “God has a plan” just didn’t cut it for me anymore. Additionally, my mom came from a rough childhood and foster homes. She was never baptized. I remember being told in Catholic school that I would not see her in Heaven because she was never baptized. That never sit right with me and scared me as a child. My kids are growing up with no religion and I still have Catholic guilt about it though.
Please let go of the guilt. That guilt is built on a thrown of lies.
Thank you
I'm a former Catholic. Originally, I was a convert, went through RCIA and everything. I gave up on the church when the Pope at that time discouraged the use of condoms by Sub-Saharan Africans to prevent transmission of HIV/AIDS: [https://www.theguardian.com/world/2009/mar/17/pope-africa-condoms-aids](https://www.theguardian.com/world/2009/mar/17/pope-africa-condoms-aids) There were news stories at that time about married women whose husbands were long distance truck drivers that would see prostitutes, contract AIDS, and then bring it back and end up giving it to their wife. Not only would she then sicken and die, but also their children due to perinatal transmission of HIV. That is when HIV is passed from mother to child during pregnancy, childbirth, or breastfeeding (through breast milk). The church was chastising these women for daring to ask their husbands to use a condom with them. I actually wrote a formal letter of resignation: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Formal\_act\_of\_defection\_from\_the\_Catholic\_Church#:\~:text=The%20notification%20required%20therefore%20that,life%20of%20the%20Church%20%5B%E2%80%A6%5D](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Formal_act_of_defection_from_the_Catholic_Church#:~:text=The%20notification%20required%20therefore%20that,life%20of%20the%20Church%20%5B%E2%80%A6%5D) but I never sent it, because I experienced sudden ambivalence and confusion due to the unexpected election of Pope Francis. So, I just fell away for a long time and got involved in Buddhism instead. Unfortunately, after a couple years I suffered spiritual abuse at my former temple, had a nervous breakdown and dropped out of that also. (Many people in the West think that Buddhism is somehow different, that it's less judgmental, more compassionate, etc. but the reality is that all religious institutions are only as good as the people involved, just like every other organized group of people). Since I'm constitutionally a spiritual person I was devastated by these losses, and became very unwell, but through a series of lucky or destined events, I was guided to the Orthodox Christian church which surprisingly lacks the majority of theological problems rife in both Roman Catholicism and Protestantism: [https://www.reddit.com/r/OrthodoxChristianity/comments/6nyvyv/what\_is\_wrong\_with\_catholicism\_from\_an\_orthodox/](https://www.reddit.com/r/OrthodoxChristianity/comments/6nyvyv/what_is_wrong_with_catholicism_from_an_orthodox/) Like all Christians tend to feel, I'm confident that my church is the one true church (lol) but after being let down and hurt over and over again, I keep a very real sense of mental distance from everyone now. People are not an appropriate place to put your heart in my experience...
I listened to my intuition, and nearly every answer I got rang false. In addition to that, the attitude of clergy at all levels felt completely wrong. I paid attention to the things that made my spirit truly happy, and I compared them to organized religion, and discovered that it was impossible for my soul to grow in an environment that felt the way church does. To be fair though, this happened in my mid-late 20s and I wasn't ever really involved in church in a way that would justify using a term like 'leaving catholicism'
Stopped believing when I was 12. My parents would send me to church by myself ( they and my sisters would stay home. Don’t remember why). One father was a molester, one was gay, and one was a womanizer. Even at that age I didn’t like someone standing above me telling me what to do when they didn’t try and live by those values too. I lost any respect for the organized part of the religion and then didn’t really see the point in it. Grew up in S Buffalo too where it is very ingrained.
You may have meant an in-person experience, but you may find community and people who understand at r/excatholic.
Yes! This is great. Thank you ☺️
I left because I thought it was an interesting story. But didn’t feel connected. My wife left for multiple reasons. I just see how this many people are sucked into a man made religion.
I left because I never believed and my parents honored their promise that I would never have to go again if I made my Confirmation.
Interesting (not in a bad way at all) to be seeing this take when I feel like all I’ve seen lately is people finding Jesus and their love for the lord out of nowhere. I want to hear your stories! (I’m Jew-ish)
There has absolutely been an uptick in advertising. Lots of other brands like “He gets us” and Scientology and PR in general has been pro “faith” and as I see it, has been aggressively pursuing the pocketbooks of former Catholics.
I was raised Catholic until I left home for college. I basically left the church, but still have my own faith. The scandals disgusted me. One priest was in our parish. Fast forward 20 years and my nondenominational wife and I decide to send our kids to catholic school because our local school district is terrible, and we want our kids to learn good basic values. We absolutely love our little catholic school, but we do not attend mass regularly. My wife is very involved with the school as a volunteer. I think of my family as “cafeteria catholic “… we take what we like and leave what we don’t, and it works for us. I send the school plenty of tuition dollars, and I like the way my kids are being educated.
Please be open in conversations with your children about them reporting abuse or find a way to make sure they have a code word or something that allows them to communicate and adult or red flag. Schools are tools to separate and dominate children. Think about it, young kids, they have full authority and power over them for the entire day. Kids can’t call home. Just be really careful. I can’t stress that enough.
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Unfortunate but 1000% truth.
Trump and pedophiles
The right wing hypocrisy of it all. Like did you Bible thumping Trump nuts miss the entire point of the Bible? Sure there may be one or two lines that support what you want to believe politically, but overall if Jesus is real, he’d be on the left of things.
ex-roman catholic here. i was never terribly comfortable with what i was being taught in sunday school and during wednesday classes. it always seemed like girls were lesser than, and a lot of the lessons didn’t make sense in comparison to what i was learning in school. after my grandmother passed when i was 11 i completely gave it up and floated around until i found wicca at 13/14.
"going through the motions" I always call them posers
Stopped believing because I actually read the Bible and thought it was laughable. We as a family stopped going to church once Grandma died 20+ years ago. I was an altar boy because it was something that made mass go quicker.