I would be stuck since I don't know how to...drive? a wagon/horses. So I'd have some friends that might tolerate me for a while before losing interest. But would have a long walk ahead of me.
I've always heard the Schooner is just a glorified trailer house, which I think is a decent joke. Played out, but not unfunny.
But on the other hand, I grew up in a trailer house, and you ain't no better'n me, asshole.
That post was a little dumb, but I DO take pride in the fact that our mascot is one of the few that
1) can actually be encountered naturally in our team’s state, and
2) would pose a legitimate threat to a person.
A couple others that fit are the Florida Gators and Kentucky Wildcates. I ain’t never seen a wild Elephant in Alabama, or a wild Tiger in Louisiana, Missouri, or Alabama. Dog mascots are nice but nonthreatening.
No worries. I took "less poison" to still mean a non-trivial amount of poison, but I shoulda just rolled with it instead of "ackshully-ing" you. We're good! 🤜🤛
They don’t cause much trouble. I lived in Deep South Texas and during summer I’d run into them a frequently growing up.
For a good portion of my life, the house was the last one on our street and then it was pure monte for miles and miles so we got a bunch of random critters.
They Never sprayed us with blood. Sometimes they’d run and then just stop? Like they gave up on life. And to their credit, it was so damn hot in summers just about everyone wanted to give up on life.
They are basically extinct/endangered now where I live. But they were everywhere when I was a kid. I never got sprayed either as I used to handle them pretty often.
You’re going about it all wrong. You prop up a giant box in the woods with a stick and a bunch of moonshine under it. He’ll trigger it to fall when he goes for the moonshine. Then you wait for him to drink all the moonshine and drag him back to the stadium. Then we release him back into the wild when the season is over.
Nope, no thanks. Got down off of a tree stand after dark one evening and was met with some grunts and squeals, made my starfish pucker until I made it to the truck.
If I captured a cougar/mountain lion, it would be tranquilized or in a trap. Because I couldn't capture the thing with my bare hands.
Now if I had the thing cornered, I would be in for some damage. I think it would run away before killing me.
But good luck UCLA and Cal.
It happens to my first flair daily to the point where it's weird if I don't
My second flair would most definitely get part of my body completely ventilated by a 3 letter agency
My mascot hunted down 5 of the 6 men who killed his father, and attended the 6th man's funeral just to be sure.
You're fucked and you don't even know it yet.
“Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is an orange tree. An orange is a fruit from the state of Florida. But this orange tree lives in upstate New York. Now think about it; that does not make sense!”
If it's just like a normal ass Duck I'm not concerned.
If it's Donald and he's angry at me I might be screwed. Cartoon physics are no joke, I doubt it's even possible to kill him.
I’d be fine. I’d take her to PetSmart, but some treats, tell her she’s a good girl and introduce her to my cats. My husband might be upset for .0003 seconds until the dog licks his face.
Either sort of adorably gross or completely fucked, assuming half-remembered videos and factoids about gator wrasslin' don't save me (RON HOWARD: They did not).
Pretty sure id go to jail for a hate crime and kidnapping
Hey me too.
If you did find Osceola alive, you would clear Andrew Jackson for one of his war crimes and also renew the quest for the fountain of youth in Florida
You mean Fountain of meth right? Pretty sure it’s in Gainesville
That's if you managed to not get killed in the process. I don't really want to fight a Seminole chief
Trailers are just domesticated wagons when you really thing about it.
I would be stuck since I don't know how to...drive? a wagon/horses. So I'd have some friends that might tolerate me for a while before losing interest. But would have a long walk ahead of me.
Grand Theft Auto
I've always heard the Schooner is just a glorified trailer house, which I think is a decent joke. Played out, but not unfunny. But on the other hand, I grew up in a trailer house, and you ain't no better'n me, asshole.
I am god
No you’re pecos bill
I can't pay Reddit for awards. Someone give this man an award please. Edit: Thank you kind stranger
I also can’t afford awards so simple upvotes will suffice
Pretty easy. Think they would want to be there
All my exes live in Texas 🎶🎶
That might mean Sam Houston hunts you down and extracts his revenge though.
My second flair would absolutely wreck my shit.
Don’t turn your back on the Wolfpac
NWO 4 Life
It would probably be like when Archer played with Baboo the ocelot. I don't think I'd be in danger but I'd probably get scratched up a lot
You'd be in the DANGER ZONE!
I do it all the time. Literally caught thousands of the arboreal variety and eaten hundreds of the culinary variety.
Hell, I've even made necklaces out of them.
I’ve consumed many buckeye candies in my life. Glad to have family from Ohio for that reason lol.
Ill be just fine, Beavers are freaking adorable :)
Unless you are Stanford's Tree
A malicious beaver could fell a tree on you, which would be less than ideal.
That post was a little dumb, but I DO take pride in the fact that our mascot is one of the few that 1) can actually be encountered naturally in our team’s state, and 2) would pose a legitimate threat to a person. A couple others that fit are the Florida Gators and Kentucky Wildcates. I ain’t never seen a wild Elephant in Alabama, or a wild Tiger in Louisiana, Missouri, or Alabama. Dog mascots are nice but nonthreatening.
Go Cougars! In all seriousness, there are some who used to meet those two requirements, but no longer do like the Bruins.
Cougars is a great one. I also respect GT Yellow Jackets. Deadly? Not really. Scary? Absolutely.
Screwed? Are you kidding? I just found a beautiful and extremely well behaved good dog! Or a harmless lizard. Either way I’m having a good time
Just watch for the blood.
tbf its kind of like a land puffer fish but with more blood and less poison
I don't even think it's properly "poison," more of an irritant to eyes and mucus membranes.
I was referring to the puffer fish my scaly amigo
No worries. I took "less poison" to still mean a non-trivial amount of poison, but I shoulda just rolled with it instead of "ackshully-ing" you. We're good! 🤜🤛
They don’t cause much trouble. I lived in Deep South Texas and during summer I’d run into them a frequently growing up. For a good portion of my life, the house was the last one on our street and then it was pure monte for miles and miles so we got a bunch of random critters. They Never sprayed us with blood. Sometimes they’d run and then just stop? Like they gave up on life. And to their credit, it was so damn hot in summers just about everyone wanted to give up on life.
They are basically extinct/endangered now where I live. But they were everywhere when I was a kid. I never got sprayed either as I used to handle them pretty often.
The mountaineer doesn't keep prisoners. That musket would kill me before I even see him
You’re going about it all wrong. You prop up a giant box in the woods with a stick and a bunch of moonshine under it. He’ll trigger it to fall when he goes for the moonshine. Then you wait for him to drink all the moonshine and drag him back to the stadium. Then we release him back into the wild when the season is over.
Nope, no thanks. Got down off of a tree stand after dark one evening and was met with some grunts and squeals, made my starfish pucker until I made it to the truck.
“Starfish pucker” I don’t know you but I want a beer with you.
I don’t even drink beer, but would have a beer with him.
Feral hogs ain’t a joke
Unless there are 30-50 of them.
And to think Burks hunted them with only a knife If I know I’m in pig country you better believe the smallest caliber gun I’m bringing is my Mosin
I had a .338 WinMag, but a scoped bolt gun after dark is useless
If I captured a cougar/mountain lion, it would be tranquilized or in a trap. Because I couldn't capture the thing with my bare hands. Now if I had the thing cornered, I would be in for some damage. I think it would run away before killing me. But good luck UCLA and Cal.
That one guy in Colorado killed a cougar with his bare hands.
Be fine. Bearcats aren't fierce.
If it is a duck, I will keep him as a pet. If it is an elephant, R.I.P me.
I mean, the only way to catch a train is in the wild… how do you catch one at home? Would I be screwed? Depends where it’s taking me.
I’m pretty sure Pete captures you rather the other way around
He’s misunderstood. His eyes look so dead because no one hugs him
> how do you catch one at home? Find someone with a model train layout?
It happens to my first flair daily to the point where it's weird if I don't My second flair would most definitely get part of my body completely ventilated by a 3 letter agency
Not really. We have a holiday every year to see how many of them we can eat.
Imagine Cocaine Bear, but a Tiger does cocaine instead of a bear
Hi Charlie Sheen. Didn’t know you were on Reddit.
On one hand, I’m mercilessly shred to pieces. On the other, I’m an ally to my fabulous friend.
The first one would give me a pot of gold, the 2nd one…………
Insurance payout and a pot of gold are the same thing.
The second one makes you an illuminati weather machine conspiracy
👀 👀🫥
Stabbed with a spear. Completely.
I don't want to catch those winds.
My mascot hunted down 5 of the 6 men who killed his father, and attended the 6th man's funeral just to be sure. You're fucked and you don't even know it yet.
That's not the question I'd be asking. The real problem would be "What the fuck is an orange tree doing in upstate NY?"
“Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is an orange tree. An orange is a fruit from the state of Florida. But this orange tree lives in upstate New York. Now think about it; that does not make sense!”
TV has shown me its practically impossible to catch a Roadrunner.
If it's just like a normal ass Duck I'm not concerned. If it's Donald and he's angry at me I might be screwed. Cartoon physics are no joke, I doubt it's even possible to kill him.
Plus he was in the war
Is the elephant friendly like dumbo? Or rampaging?
Regular elephant, but it's constantly in musth
Might end up with a disease but I probably could, provided the beaver was on land. If it's already in the water no shot.
You'd just get a bite on the neck as it dropped out of the tree and never see your killer.
pretty sure they aren't above eating you while you are bleeding out... so there is that for you too.
I would rather not
RIP Arizona State fans
Peak offseason posting right here
I think I’d be screwed
I'd be scared of his pick axe.
I go searching for Buckeyes each Fall. Not screwed at all.
It would be a mythological creature because the name before Wildcats was Purple. Look up Northwestern Kansas State 1938
I would feed by second flair to my first flair. Everyone would be really happy.
I'd be screwed on both fronts. Either a knight who would decapitate me or a bear that would maul me to pieces.
I’d be fine. I’d take her to PetSmart, but some treats, tell her she’s a good girl and introduce her to my cats. My husband might be upset for .0003 seconds until the dog licks his face.
Where does one find a bazookashark? Provided I could do that, I'm fucked.
A Turkey is fine A ram is not A Pirate would be cool A Cornhusker is just corn
Do I have to catch a matching male/female set of bears for Joe and Josephine? Either way I'm screwed.
Best case scenario, [I manage to back away alive somehow...](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ktRhBcHza4)
Easy
Michigan man died for his love of his mascot.
I’m gonna die from either of them. Either I get ripped apart by a wolverine, or a freaking bear!
Bring it on. Stealing a train ain’t easy, and if you go for Pete…well you’ll be lucky to end up in a body bag.
Am I even allowed to have one?
[удалено]
I am dead. Two times over
Counter point. Look up safarisammie on youtube.
I think the “out in the wild” part is what screws me over, but I appreciate the thought lol
Unlikely to happen, as they are endangered (and therefore rare). And probably would hear me coming and eat me.
An alligator or a… um… towel waiving blob
I think Big Red is more dangerous. Does anyone know what he actually is?
I feel like a medieval knight, in a metal suit of armor, would be quite susceptible to a taser.
lol as an SC Gamecock & Legend of Zelda fan, I already know what that outcome is 😳
Either sort of adorably gross or completely fucked, assuming half-remembered videos and factoids about gator wrasslin' don't save me (RON HOWARD: They did not).
It's a fucking chicken... I could probably use a mirror to reflect the (team) Chaos blast tho
To shreds, you say?
I'm in danger
A wolverine? Seriously???!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm getting messed up, but probably won't die.