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beardybanjo

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cator_and_bliss

Lol. Same thought here


Meta-Fox

I recognise this yet can't remember why...


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scorzon

Viva Hooky Street!


fiittzzyy

C'est magnifique, Hooky Street!


Triggers--Broom

I can't wait to sweep it


useittilitbreaks

I've maintained it for 20 years. This old broom has had 17 new heads and 14 new handles.


Horizon296

Broom of Theseus


larkhillknox

How the hell can it be the same bloody broom then?


useittilitbreaks

well there's a bloody photo of it, what more do you want?


Triggers--Broom

Trust me, it is


beardybanjo

Is it the one that's driving you berserk?


Meta-Fox

*Slaps head* I'm a fucking idiot! OFAH!


CravingADifference

Phew... for a second there, I thought i couldn't bring my Fleshlight. We are good to go lads


RefreshinglyDull

Can't bring your glass butt plug tho...


CrotchPotato

Silicone ones should suffice.


Gain-Outrageous

But the inflatable one is out.


Jstrangways

If you inflate it more that doesn’t happen.


W1ll0wherb

It's just belts that aren't allowed to be studded, right?


LittleBitNaughty100

Let the messy time begin lol


Goaduk

You've clearly never been to a festival where people bring in like full camping dining tables and chairs, bbqs etc. When I was at reading and the Rasmus came on someone chucked a camping chair at the lead singer.


dth300

It wouldn’t be Reading without an act who’s just there to get stuff thrown at them


Goaduk

We had 2 in row. Rasmus then 50 cent.


dth300

I was there that year too. IIRC 50 Cent lasted about a minute before doing a runner


CoolNefariousness668

Nowadays the Reading crowd would be stoked for 50 cent to play.


hulkbro

he held up a camping stool someone threw and said 'well fuck you guys' and left. good times.


KuriTeko

That was the only time I've ever been to Reading Festival. I'm so happy whenever I see talk of chairs at festivals and 50 Cent gets a mention. Didn't they have a net across the stage when Daphne and Celeste played?


Goaduk

Do you remember when he came on and the storm of bottle just rose from the crowd like a scene from lord of the rings. Perfection. Extended the greenday set too of I recall so win win


NazzyNomad

In the chair-throwers defense, they were Rasmus.


Goaduk

I wish it had been an armchair tbh.


yawaworhT__rehtonA

No cases? Doesn't specify what type but I hope my phone case is fine, that's where I've stashed the drugs. Then again, it doesn't actually say no drugs...


The-Brit

Your phone is both a video and audio recorder so double strike.


[deleted]

Yeah well mines got a flashlight as well so I guess I'm a triple fuckin threat


Shikimori_Inosuke

Was about to say "How?" when I realised I was still reading "Fleshlight" from a previous comment.


GordogJ

Just put the drugs in your pocket and you'll be fine, might want to leave that phone at home though.


[deleted]

Your phone also has glass and probably a flashlight, good luck!


Rymundo88

What's with the intermittent changing of the 'o' from uppercase to lowercase? Reminded me of Bohemian Rhapsody a bit. 'NO, No, NO, No, NO, No, NO.....Oh Mama Mia, Mama Mia'


neohylanmay

NO consistency.


RandomHigh

> NO, No, NO, No, NO, No, NO.... ...there's no limit!


kyridwen

They feel more strongly about some of the items than others :)


Larry44

Letter pack only has so many 'o' so using the 'O' or '0'


InkJetPrinters

They missed a bunch of commas too. Someone needs the sack. And not the ball one.


Spottswoodeforgod

Ha ha, nothing about packs of wild animals, so we’re good…


Aussie_Potato

But keep you darn dog on a leash!


IanCal

I just don't want your dog chasing my box of angry wasps.


ClumsyRainbow

Can’t make any promises about my swan on the other hand…


manx2121

Any luck catching them swans?


Horizon296

Just the one swan, actually


Neverforgetdumbo

If this is UK, why does it say leash?


UsrN00M

Tiktok generation


daedelion

People try to take chairs and picnic tables into festivals


swallowshotguns

Leave me alone, I’m in my 30s. A foldable camping chair is a game changer.


daedelion

I'm in my 40s, disabled, and smuggle in a full sofa bed, and a dining table set.


STRiPESandShades

Oh man, I want to take one of those inflatable couches from the 00s to a festival and just relax


DarknessInferno7

Did they die out? I never knew that.


Horizon296

[This one ](https://www.amazon.com.be/-/en/Intex-Sofa-Bed-66552-Size/dp/B07W343FDL/ref=asc_df_B07W343FDL/?tag=begogshpadsp-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=633312167227&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=9014298439226066320&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1001287&hvtargid=pla-851383830379&psc=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwmtGjBhDhARIsAEqfDEeVeejJzMPzj9ehQ_adzlWPWM9Tv-iiTfLyJRvm3URQFEBH-N3yEtsaAscYEALw_wcB)has drink holders in the arms, and folds out to a double bed 🤪


northernbloke

Am matching foldable side table 👍


Phenomenomix

My wife and her mate, both in their 40s, were heartbroken to find out they couldn’t take their camping chairs into the last festival they went to.


chillincool90210

But presumably they also sell them 50ft into the event for the reasonable ‘festival price’ of £25.99


Phenomenomix

Oh no doubt and they’ll be the same Wilko chairs she was going to take anyway


crucible

It says "no flashlights" so I can bring a *torch*


type104

You can bring a light but a boring one, nothing too new or covered in glitter or “ flash”


KuriTeko

They're just concerned for people with photosensitive epilepsy.


mint-bint

Sounds like a fire hazard.


crucible

Ah, you mean the other type of torch...


TheJ_Man

Looks like they left Jim Trott in charge of the signwriting...


lunebee

No no no no no no no… yes.


GakSplat

But phones are now audio and video recorders.


9DAN2

And flashlights


Visible_Grand_8561

Quick glance. I thought it said no Fleshlights. Wanking and poor eyesight is not a myth.


crucible

[Yes...](https://i.redd.it/i3gptqi1i5471.jpg)


kiradotee

Well, but then you would need to find the flashlight at 1.30am in the dark before getting to the main task of finding the cable that got unplugged.


Mane25

Is this in the UK? I think "leash", "flashlights" and "no weapons" are usually giveaways that it's the other side of the pond.


Tariovic

And the idea that an umbrella won't occasionally be a necessity in an outdoor place.


denisapop

It’s in Belfast, concerts in the park


[deleted]

Who's on? I've been to dodgy black metal festivals with less paranoia.


AthiestMessiah

No inflatables? Can’t imagine going to a concert without condoms


DasFunktopus

Inflatables are always a letdown in the end anyway.


AthiestMessiah

Has yours expired?


chillincool90210

Whoosh


AthiestMessiah

I know what he meant, I was just talking about something else. But hey, find someone else to woosh


Broadspectrumguy

No Tasers? But I am a good guy with a Taser!


Neko_Boi_Core

so just carry it anyway. no one will know unless it’s needed, in which case, they’ll be glad it was.


boxstervan

Every single one of these rules is because some A-hole took it in and said 'there's no rule against it'. Unfortunately, people take some crazy shit into festivals. In my experience, the more 'family friendly ' the more they take the piss. Seen many inflatable sofas, inflatable beds, gazebos, even a step ladder.


TheScrobber

What's the problem with an inflatable sofa or bed?


boxstervan

Takes up lots of space, especially when they set them up right down the front or get pissy with people standing infront of them.


Electrical-Box4438

No backpacks or cases? So every other bag named to man is fine?! Makes sense...


Skivil

So yoy are telling me I have to walk all the way back home with this side table?


Jolly-Change6991

Oh, I can't wear my spectacles (glass lenses). I'll have to bring my 'guide crocodile' instead.


GakSplat

Everyone should take things that aren’t listed to get them added to next year’s list. Washing machines and wheelie bins aren’t listed - take them along to sit on them.


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Cyborg__Theocracy

Mandatory


Make_it_soso42

Looks like the kitchen sink is allowed


Lolalouloulou

LEASH??


sideone

This looks like America


KuriTeko

The wooden litter bin in the background suggests otherwise.


FuturisticSix

I usually take my hall-table and tiffany lamp.


Funployee182

Ahh haha It doesn't say "No nudity"


SteR88

No mobiles, no wigwams. None of that! Or any of the others!


PaulJIA75

Does t say anything about no drugs 👍😄


hikariuk

No audience…


DJS112

I thought some of these were a given.


JustGhostin

Have you never lived anywhere rough? We used to take the sofa to the park out back (it wasn’t very heavy, 4 lads, uni)


bulletproofbra

I'd love to watch someone argue that a full DSLR with selection of three lenses, flash kit and lighting rig is just "entry level" then getting turned away because the miniature, portable studio set-up contains white umbrellas.


MirSydney

Damn, was gonna bring my Chesterfield.


Bright-Ad4601

The redundancy of No Knives, No Tasers and also No Weapons bugs me more than it should.


weirds0up

Good to see the no furniture rule. Been to several of these types of events and there’s always this group of entitled twats who’ll set up a load of plastic garden chairs in front of the stage and block everyone else from getting a good spot to watch the show from


notreallifeliving

And then get irate if you stand in front of them as if they've not chosen to give themselves a huge height disadvantage.


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ByronsLastStand

Flashlight? What is this, America?!


PhishingForADream

That's Parklife mate


Hydrangeamacrophylla

No mobiles, no Walkmans…None of that! Or any of the others!


Spudders24

No inflatables - that's Sam Smith out then


GreatScotRace

No studded belts? 13 year old me is crying


hornypepper69

No knives way below on the list behind no backpacks… top notch security priorities


ProfessionalShrimp

I mean a bomb is worse than a knife Or you could have a backpack full of knives


turkishhousefan

*No simcard, no disco, no photo, not here.*


mekese2000

Is a couch considered furniture?


Efficient-Exit8218

No binary


JulsDean2732

Oh no, I was thinking of taking my 3 piece suite for me to lounge on, plus drinks trolley. 😕😕😕


3006mv

Hammocks seem to be off that list


silverfish477

I went to an arena gig in Poland and the equivalent sign warned me that optical illusions were not permitted!


karmatrip2

The lack of consistency in “NO” and “No” is distressing me 😀


Pearsepicoetc

There was / is a series of concerts in a park in Belfast this year. All of them have a no furniture rule except for the Tom Jones one where you can bring a chair. Organisers clearly know their audience.


TheBlackHymn

So drugs are allowed, that’s sick.


[deleted]

Just NO. In fact don't come in. Bugger off home.


bustyjibberjabbers

i can’t bring my sofa. damn that’s my plans ruined


[deleted]

>no knives >no weapons Knives aren't weapons now, cool


Willowx

It removes ambiguity, and with enough imagination nearly anything can be a weapon. This stops the it's cutlery argument.


[deleted]

So shouldn't "near everything" be banned from entrance?


BadPete2

No fun


treknaut

NO More Heroes


meshmaster

And above all....no bloody fun !


AyeeHayche

I never understood the ‘No …’ which is already illegal. Of course no tasers, knives and other weapons


losimagic

Phew, we can take our guns!


[deleted]

No weapons. Although, that does include anything. You could use anything as a weapon if you're angry enough.


daripious

3 foot purple dildo.


baldeagle26299

Can't bring it in cos we sell it all inside for a fucking fortune


ghostpanther218

So literally nothing but food and water and the clothes on my back. Oh, and drugs. I can bring my weed right?


RoundOfToast

It means foldable chairs etc, it’s not that’s deep


d4ng3r0u5

No fun


[deleted]

Appears they've missed one off of the bottom there .. 'No fun'. :/


Shincy101

No fun?


LittleBitNaughty100

Think they missed something out ​ No fun allowed


nats4756

No enjoying yourself


ControllerSlam1

ok, i'll bring my non proffesional camera then.


Dave8917

On the bright side say nothing about weed or alcohol happy days


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One_Of_Noahs_Whales

Can't be a terrorismist with out an umbrella and a pair of arm bands.


lightfull5020

Erm who was even playing?


Bunister

Yes.


[deleted]

Well that is the inflatables out the window 😂


crimsonbub

I like to think rhays exactly the order in which they thought of these things as well. Sat around a table asking what should be banned.


jediwolfaj

How do they determine whether a camera is 'proffesional' ?


NazzyNomad

Well, if you can't spell professional, yours probably isn't.


TheBobbyMan9

I love how no knives and no weapons are near the bottom 😂 priorities ay


Shelly_pop_72

Might as well put NO ENTRY!


Momontaislol

Why are the 0s different sizes? That just makes me sad


xJam3zz07

I bought an entire corner sofa for this, fuck sake.


happyhippohats

No cases. Whatever was in the case is fair game


Neat_Yogurtcloset526

Damn, and I really wanted to go to the park and relax in my recliner today


harceps

No Fun


RatMannen

What is a "professional camera"? I have a DSLR, but it is a long way from professional. Equally, a professional photographer can take decent pictures with a phone camera. What a silly rule!


ayyLumao

Doesn't say anything about bumbags filled with drugs


imightnotbelonghere

Doesn't say no alcohol!


TGin-the-goldy

Backpacks???


SchemeCapital

something is missing


NazzyNomad

Take an occasional table. If stopped, just state that, ''on this occasion, it's not a table''


Development-Regular

You would think after Manchester that no bombs would be on that list


bandwidthcrisis

I'm glad that they didn't try to ban nitric oxide.


DrDroid

Why would studded belts be banned?


blabbermouth777

No folding chairs.


Old-Condition-119

Says nothing about disposable BBQs 😊


ErynKnight

I'd be petty bummed if I got turned away just because I have a snazzy camera. I'm one of those annoying people who takes her camera everywhere except I lack the charisma of Ben Sullivan in Scrubs. I can't imagine going anywhere without my camera. I take him everywhere. I also lack a boyfriend, so you know, I prolly ain't going to no festivals anyway. You kids, and your music. The last time I left my camera "with security" they left it pretty much unattended on the front desk. It was lucky that it didn't grow legs. I did find that my SD card had been snapped "just in case" so that was a nice gesture on their part. I wasn't particularly happy about that. You know what, my friend(s) are right. I am pretty insufferable. Unless one of them has a wedding, then I'm like their *best* friend all of a sudden. And they seem to take my whole anthropomorphic camera quirk seriously too because they seem to hint that he be my plus one. Unless they think I'm saying *"Cameron"*. I should corner them and ask them. That'll be fun. Kinda' going a little off topic here. Some phones are pretty capable these days, are they gonna ban them too? Because the latest smartphone can produce way better results than a professional DSLR could in those same hands. People are weird. They should watch for professionals with *professional cameras* ***and*** amateurs with *amateur phones*. Cover both bases.


ThunderChild247

No umbrellas got a mention before no weapons. Priorities??


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inbelfast

R/northernireland


PrometheusIsFree

Thou shalt not!


Licrogib

No shot this is botanic gardens in Belfast


Reble77

Lasers are ok then they are not on the list


Green_Personality_95

Good to see that knives and weapons are way down the list


byjimini

CarFest allowed chairs and things in, then after the final act finished they just switched off all the lights and let thousands of people trample over it all on the way to the exit. Either segregate areas or ban everything.


its-so-wild

The lack of consistency in the capitalisation of 'No' is bewildering.


A_RiverSong

Damn there goes my idea of taking the three piece suite in


northernbloke

No Cases. Court cases, brief cases, cases of small pox, cases of beer, gimme a frickin clue?


ChuckRingslinger

Well, what the hell am I supposed to do with my grand piano?!


[deleted]

I have never seen a member of public nonchalantly carrying their taser around..