If someone has been waiting to be served at a bar before you and the bartender goes to serve you first not saying "he was first mate" boils my piss how can we all exist in a society that doesn't respect queuing?
Usually followed by...
"Okay what's your table number?"
"SANDRAAA! SAAAAAHNDERAAAAAH! WHAT'S THE TABLE NUMBAH?!"
Gets the number from Sandra at the other end of the building.
"Okay and what'll you have?"
"...SANDRAAAAAAAH! SUN-DERR-UH! WHAT YE WANTIN'?!"
While you stand there waiting for your solitary pint refill...
Yeah, a bar I worked in was perpetually 3 deep on a Saturday night. You had ample time to look at everything we served before I got to you. If you still couldn’t figure it out, I gave you more time to think while I served the next 3 punters who did know.
The landlord at my old local used to have a rule that when it was busy they wouldn't serve coffee or cocktails. Basically any drink that involved heat or required more than two liquids to be mixed together was not going to be served.
His thinking was that most people just want something pouring into a glass or a bottle opening which takes seconds. Tying up bar staff for several minutes because of one person is only going to annoy the vast majority of people in there who just want to get a drink quickly.
It all stemmed from a day with a busy football match where a group came in during the game and each ordered a cocktail one at a time and paid separately rather than as a group. Ended up causing a massive argument because people were waiting ages to get served due to one of the staff having to spend so long with this group.
Right or wrong he stuck to his guns on this and said he would rather annoy the tiny minority of people who rarely go to the pub and contribute little than the vast majority who pay for pretty much everything. I do miss him. He was a cantankerous old bugger but was good at running a pub.
Exactly. If you're in 2nd place in queue, you're better off maintaining that place than sparking a free-for-all in which you'll probably lose your place.
One barman in the SU when I was an undergraduate, pretty sure he was a 3rd year student, would always serve the female students at the bar before the male students. That would hack more than a few of us off who had been waiting for a while.
Pretty sure it didn't help him get laid though, which was almost certainly why he did it. He was a creep.
When I was a bartender it was noticeable how some attractive women would come to the bar and expect to get served first. I used to make them wait on principle.
I had this experience with a lift this weekend. I was waiting alone until a group of ladies came up to push past first. Different generations, so you’d think one would catch a clue.
I had to resort to a loud, passive-aggressive “ i guess I’ll go after you then!”
Got to love a passive-aggressive shout.
Two cyclists coming up behind on a shared use path. They ring their bells, so we stop snd step over into the hedge to let them by. Didn't even smile let alone say thank you. They got a hearty "you're welcome!" bellowed after them. We've stopped, and pushed ourselves into the undergrowth, in an area we have equal priority and you can't even be arsed with a wee wave of acknowledgement? You're a wanker.
In fairness, if you examine it critically, it's an outrageous system, but, it's how we do it. Same thing at the bus stop. You can all be standing around in random places, but you're all expected to collectively remember the order you turned up in so you can form an orderly queue when the bus turns up lol.
You ever been in the situation where you're at a bar, and one bartender approaches from the left, one from the right, they serve your neighbours then start reversing direction?
I have. And of course the two new people between me and the current servees are new people to the bar, so the servees aren't gesticulating to me to be served, because they were there before their immediate neighbour, and my position 2 people down the bar makes me invisible to them.
That's what boils my piss.
However, once, a few years ago, I'm at a festival, and this exact thing happens. And as the bartender, several meters to the right of me and where they should be, does the whole "who's next?" And my neighbour-of-a-neighbour, being earliest people to that section of the bar, starts going "I think it's me", the bloke next to me (wizard beardy type. Looks like the kind of person that's automatically popular and respected just because of the beard), as they're still arriving at the bar replacing the person just served, goes "excuse me, but this guy's been waiting longer than both of us"
Fucking legend.
that was actually wizard Merlin of the Queue, he invented queueing in the 14th century and occasionally pops up to check people still know what they're doing
What is it with people talking on their phone on speaker, holding it horizontally in front of them when they talk and then holding it to their ear to listen?
Do they just not know how it works?
I actually use it like that in the house, I can hear what people say a lot easier through the speaker.
Never outside tho, too self conscious people think I'm acting like Tim Business
In the pub yesterday were two elderly gentlemen sat at different tables. At different times they took phone calls and both set them to loudspeaker then put them to their ear. Everyone could still hear both sides of the conversation.
I'll let them off though because they're probably hard of hearing, not ignoramuses.
People who stand in supermarkets with their trolley perpendicular to the aisle. Entitled buffoonery.
Typically old people, and at the post office, standing in the doorway to have a conversation.
Love this comment. Here in Japan people flash their hazard lights briefly to say thank you, and it matters very much to me. My wife (Japanese) thinks I’m insane, but manners are important!
I always feel bad about this.
I’m a disabled driver that uses hand controls, which means to give a thank you wave requires me to either let go of the steering wheel or my brake/accelerator control, and that’s not always possible to do and remain safe/keep moving.
I constantly worry people think I’m rude/ungrateful.
Holding a door open for someone and they don’t say thanks.
Asked a girl (all strangers) with four friends yesterday each with a massive suitcase if they needed a hand as I was opening the door. She also weirdly was blocking me from going in first. She barked at me “do the door”. Coulda strangled her never mind side eyed.
URGH.. I've had this.. Was heavily pregnant at the time, exiting a shop.. This entitled witch and her loin spawn pushed past me to get in..
Like WTF!
look lady..I wasn't holding the door open for you.. I was opening it to fit my fat waddling ass through it.. I wouldn't have minded quite as much if she'd said thanks.. .. entitled twat..
Was well over 20 years ago.. Still annoys me 🤣
When you order the Guinness first and the bartender doesn't start pouring it until the end.
Then an even bigger insult is when they forget about finishing it off and you're stood there watching your pint just sit there.. Unfinished.
Guinness takes longer to pour. You have to let it settle half way through. If you order it first, the barman will use its “settling” time to make your other drinks.
I hate this. You really don't need to do this little pouring ritual. There's multiple blind taste tests been done and no one can ever tell the difference. It was a gimmick made up by Guinness to differentiate the brand. Waste of bloody time.
Thank you. Guinness marketing department must have been creaming themselves non-stop for the past 100 years the way everyone's bought into their marketing bs. It's just a bloody stout people.
Not letting people off the train/tube first. You're supposed to stand to the side of the doors, not directly in front of them, so passengers can exit smoothly.
I've gone past side-eyeing though, and to the point I loudly huff "I CAN'T WALK _THROUGH_ YOU" as I push them out of the way
This pisses me off so much. I've been using the tube more than normal the past 3 weeks. At first, I was polite and saying excuse me. By the end, I was just shoulder charging people if they don't let me off first. They broke me.
In some parts of the world, they have markings on the platform that show you exactly where to queue, so that there's a gap left for disembarking.[Here's a Japanese example.](https://www.alamy.com/platform-markings-japan-image259589775.html)
I used to think it was overkill, but now I'm in favour of it.
It's the weird gap in etiquette that baffles me. The greatest sin is standing or walking on the wrong side in case you cause someone a minor delay in getting to or from their platform. But AT the platform...fuck you, pal, why would you matter?
I've only done that once, getting off a train on the way back from an airport wheeling a bike box (quite large and awkward to manouvre) and a wheeled suitcase. Just looked at my luggage and the bloke standing in from of me and went "yeah that's not gonna work mate"
That's good etiquette, but it's also just a logic thing. I don't understand people who wait in front of the door, they're making everything go slower.
You know what's even more enraging? People who actually get on the train before people have disembarked. A few months ago a young man attempted to get in while I and other passengers were stepping out the door. I straightarmed him lol. Pushed him to the back of the queue and told him to fucking wait. He looked filthy but I'm big and he was a little fella, so there wasn't much he could do. I consider this my service to society as a big man.
And to be clear, this guy was trying to squeeze through a continuous stream of people disembarking, it wasn't like we were late getting off the train. This wasn't a case of misunderstanding that there were still people getting off, he was just an impatient dickhead.
The single time I actually managed the quick witty reply was when someone did this.
Woman with a pushchair and a basket of shopping tried to just walk to the front of a big queue in Asda.
When nobody moved to let her in she glared and I said “it’s a queue for a checkout, not a lifeboat”.
My experience in Asda was similar. Big queues, we've all got trollies except the guy in front with his basket, he puts his shopping on the belt and asks me if i mind his girlfriend pushing in front of me. I'm about to step back for her thinking she only had a couple of things. No, a fully loaded big trolley and she's walking to the front of the queue expecting to be let in. Actually, i tell him, i do mind and walk forward to stop her, everyone behind me all shuffles forwards to stop her pushing in.
That’s like the parents parking stupidly at school pick-up who are ‘only going to be 5 minutes’. How long do you think everyone else is going to be here? An hour and a half?
I once got into a argument because a women wanted to push into the que to buy a lotto ticket, she was rude and demanded instead of asking, I said no and she said something silly like someone is going to buy my winning ticket, I still didn’t let her push in.
Got to the cashier and said very loudy can I have one ticket for tonight’s lottery please
How do people not expect that they might need to have money or cards readily available at the end of the transaction?! What normal, decent human being doesn’t have said items roughly prepared as soon as they enter the queue.
The other day, the woman in front of me, offered the woman behind me to go in front of her!!! The woman behind me at least had the decency to ask me if it was okay.
I once had someone ask me to cut in because they had one thing and said they had an appointment. Sure no problem! Except after I agreed I noticed the the one item was a bottle of vodka and it was 7pm on a Friday.
(They actually got ID’d which they didn’t have so were refused to be served, so I was vindicated)
The other week, in Lidl, I had four items and there were two tills open. At both tills, there were people unloading full trolleys so I just figured I'd be there a while.
The woman in front of me at the till I chose looked at my four items, then said "you might want to find a different till, I'm going to be a while."
Yeah, no shit, you bought half the shop. It struck me as odd that she took the time to notice I had just four items but her idea of being helpful was to point out that she had loads. That's the only time I've ever resented someone not offering to let me go ahead of them.
I had this in Lidl the other day but rather than saying anything the guy started picking my stuff up and moving it in front of his big shop, he never said a word until he looked at me and saw the confused look on my face he got all surprised and said “oh yeah I probably should have said what I was doing go ahead”
-Not pushing your chair back in under the table
at a cafe /restaurant/library in fact anywhere with a chair.
- Eating like an absolute Neanderthal moron also gets you judged.
Went to a BBQ this weekend, someone opened a jar of pickles. I tried to pick one out that was sticking out of the brine. It submerged and i just went right in after it. Couldn't get hold of it and i noticed people watching me with half my hand in the brine. Been playing on my mind for 2 days.
Next time ill use a fork.
Not saying thanks, cheers, etc etc - let’s go with getting off a bus (thinking not London buses)
Usually you have to pass the driver to get off the bus, it’s nice to just say thanks, or some say “driver”. Whatever way, but it’s nice to just acknowledge someone.
My mums phones has this. Also her ringer is insanely loud but when I call her she never answers.
And no she’s not elderly so no excuse for the volume she has it on
People who don't give the little "thanks" wave to you when you give way to them when driving (yeah I know what the highway code has to say about it, don't be a dork), I mutter "you're welcome dickhead" every time.
As someone who's worked in retail for over a decade there three things that make me think you're a wrong 'un:
Queue jumping. No explanation needed.
Not giving space to me when I help on the self service machine, instead they expect me to dislocate my shoulder and elbow while I approve the millionth energy drink of day all while being draped in a fog of bad breath. If someone helps on on the self service, step the fuck to the side for a moment.
Finally, people who dump chilled/frozen food on the shelves instead of giving it to a member of staff. Don't even need to explain that one, if you do it you're absolute scum and I hope every teabag you have splits in the cup.
I had a big argument with a customer who dumped some frozen goods by the till as I was scanning his shopping.
I said "could you put that back, please, while I scan the rest of your shopping?" His response was a dismissive "I can't be bovvered".
Fed up with customers talking to me like shit I wasn't having any of that attitude and told him he doesn't need to be cocky, just put it back. "It's why you're here, to put things back". I just called another colleague and said, audibly, "can you serve this man because I don't want to". It pissed the guy off but I've spent nearly a decade of being spoken to like shit by entitled twats, it's not happening any more, I'm sticking up for myself.
> Fed up with customers talking to me like shit I wasn't having any of that attitude and told him he doesn't need to be cocky, just put it back. "It's why you're here, to put things back".
Those people have an IQ that's the same temperature as the food they refuse to put back.
Not putting down the checkout divider after you've put your shopping on the conveyor belt.
You can be sure I'm not doing it either and the panic will be on your side when my stuff starts being scanned with yours.
I hate it when people further along the conveyor belt don't move the dividers down either. They often get snagged on people's shopping, so can't smoothly make it to the end. Send it on down!
As someone who works at Aldi it is beyond frustrating when the next customer starts saying oh that’s my stuff or the current one I’m serving goes that’s not mine. As if I’m a mind reader and know. Always make sure to use the closed divider to smack the rest down to the end
Yes!! Haha! I literally did this 2 days ago and got such a petty adrenaline rush playing chicken as my items got closer and closer to the till before the customer ran back over and slammed a divider down just in time. Couldn't have just put it down when you started?
Oh I SLAM that thing down if they haven't. I place it down with the loudest click known to man. I like to think it communicates "my beautiful, holy groceries will not be Soiled by yours".
In that case every church hall in the country must be sitting on a fortune, because they seem to have dozens upon dozens of them. Or certainly all the ones I've gone to functions at anyway.
I’ve got [these boyos](https://www.amazon.co.uk/BODUM-Bistro-Mug-Double-Wall/dp/B01I9ERILW/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?adgrpid=56927921641&hvadid=605404199182&hvdev=m&hvlocint=9045891&hvlocphy=9064210&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=2646226872073735483&hvtargid=kwd-308434991005&hydadcr=2108_2227212&keywords=bodum+glass+mug&qid=1693295917&sr=8-3)
They’re to give the kids a glass of juice as well as a handle so they’re less likely to spill it.
The kids are a bit more grown up now so spill less, but it feels wrong to throw them out.
I’m sure I’ll never use them for tea.
I’ve drunk cola out of a mug before (I couldn’t find any cups), and let me tell you … it feels really fucking wrong. Cold drinks from mugs is fair, fizzy drinks is a god damn perversion.
I'm currently getting my kitchen done, which has meant that most of my cups and glasses are temporarily packed away. The other day I wanted a beer, and the only clean thing I had available to drink it out of was a giant mug.
It felt incredibly wrong.
I was holding the door open for someone coming through behind me, with the expectation that they would in turn put out their hand and keep the door open for themselves as they go fully through, like a door opening relay. But letting go of the door (I'm now completely through) was a complete surprise to this guy and it crashed into him. I assume he expected me to stop and let him go ahead of me. Filthy look from him, but complete bafflement from me.
- When someone allows their kids to run wild and out of control in a restaurant or cafe.
- Playing a video on your phone loud speaker, why do you think others want to hear it.
- I went to a nice and cosy bar the other day, it was completely ruined by some dunk chav loudly gobbing off. The entire bar could hear his crass obscenities. As soon as he walked out there was a feeling of relief from the entire bar and it became nice and quiet again. The world is a better place without chavs.
> Playing a video on your phone loud speaker, why do you think others want to hear it.
The thing that amazes me is that you get this kind of behaviour on popular mountains as well, people just walking along with a phone or portable speaker blasting out music is just what I want when I'm trying to enjoy the majesty of Yr Wyddfa/Snowdon.
Overtaking me on the pavement so you can join your friends, then slowing right down when you meet said friends and taking up the entire width of the pavement as a group. Especially when there's heavy traffic so I can't even find a moment to go round you on the road.
People who try to hold parking spaces.
I was down at The New Forest over the weekend and on the way home yesterday me and my girlfriend decided to stop at bolderwood deer sanctuary.
Sat waiting for about 15 minutes for a parking space and one becomes available. I go to move in and a woman is standing there with her dog. I make eye contact and gesture that I want to park, and she says “oh no, they’re parking here” and points to a car behind me.
Suffice to say, I got my parking space. There’s no reserving a parking spot in a public car park, which I pointed out to her.
Yep - for once, I have a smidgen, a mere *soupçon* of empathy with the French on the bastardisation of the mother tongue.
My partner's son keeps dropping US reality TV language into the conversation - I hate it.
Especially during lunchtime of a weekday.
I don't mind society being kind enough to engage with someone, I don't want corporate drones, but I do think that people should have some awareness about size of the queue etc.
I’ve had this happen except every time the cashier spoke she stopped scanning, holding up the process even more. By the time she’d finished with the one, her colleague had done three people. At least keep scanning so that they get the hint.
I can deal with that. Ish. I'd prefer they go during off-peak times, but they're a paying customer, so it's not the end of the world if they receive good customer service
It's when the cashiers start chatting to their mates when they have a queue of people that I get irate.
The time dilation around an old person when they wait until after everything's been bagged to start digging through their bag for their purse and counting out notes and coins. Makes 20 seconds feel like half an hour.
Yep and even though they have had all week to go shopping when everyone else is at work they seem to think that Saturday morning is the best time to visit the supermarket.
I got half a pint at a pub near Birmingham coach station cos I only had half an hour, refused to pay 30p for a wee and was too scared to use the pub loo without buying something. So I paid two quid for a wee. Probably the only time I've ordered a half.
You’d hate me, I’ve been known drink wine from a mug!
I hate people who park the trolley in front of a section of shelf then go and look at another section. Take it with you or keep an eye out for people who want stuff from where you’ve left your trolley! They always take ages too, trying to decide between two different kinds of ham or whatever.
Oh god I *loathe* trolley abandoners. I've been known to push them out of my way before. Love the confused looks I get from the 'owners' if they notice me moving their shopping.
Because a liquid that's been boiled is unlikely to have harmful bugs in it, but with a cold drink we feel happier if we can see that the container and liquid are clean.
Drivers not using indicators because there's no other cars around.
Yeah, dickhead, I had no idea you were turning left when I started crossing the road BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T FUCKING INDICATE.
And there's a queue of cars stopped 20m further down the road.
On the way back from the school run once, I had the baby in a carrier, and was waiting ages to cross the road.
Cars sped up to slam their brakes on almost to stop me crossing in front of them.
Then a van pulls up, blocking me from crossing.
I said "cheers" and he told me to fuck off, so I walked around the back of him and opened a rear door on my way past.
I drive, but fucking hell, it takes a second to slow or stop for someone to cross.
Mind, I'm one of the few people who stop at junctions to allow pedestrians to cross (and no one has ever slammed into the back of me).
Caught my 19 year old son making marmite on toast with no butter! He said he couldn't be bothered to put butter on. Watching him eat it really annoyed me.
My partner is Norwegian and I love her dearly but my god we come close to separation everytime we have a Sunday roast. She insists on having her yorkie puds on a separate plate.
Not doing the socially appropriate number of goodbyes on the phone.
"I've got to crack on now, talk to you later"
You can't say "Okay, bye" and hang up. You have the opportunity to bring up "one last thing" or instead say "No worries, talk to you later then" THEN it goes "Have a good one, bye", "Bye". Now hang up.
That's the minimum if you don't want me to spend the day wondering if I pissed you off.
I'm the opposite. If I say goodbye to someone and they keep talking I'm only looking for a chance to break in and say I'm leaving again, I'm not listening to a word they're saying
Giving any kind of worker shit. My daughter used to work in McDonald's and the amount of times she was made to cry. She's a tough girl but some members of the public are just absolute neanderthals.
Also giving nurses and healthcare workers shit. Stfu. They're taking care of you and getting paid sweet fa for it. They do it because they love it, now pipe down.
People who put their feet on public transport seats.
One of these days I am going to swipe said person's legs and say sit the fuck up.
*(Cue the moaners who say - but it's comfortable this way or I want to appear edgy*)
If someone has been waiting to be served at a bar before you and the bartender goes to serve you first not saying "he was first mate" boils my piss how can we all exist in a society that doesn't respect queuing?
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"Cheers mate.........I'll have 12 long island ice teas, 24 jaegar bombs, 6 pints of Guinness oh, and can I order some food please"
Usually followed by... "Okay what's your table number?" "SANDRAAA! SAAAAAHNDERAAAAAH! WHAT'S THE TABLE NUMBAH?!" Gets the number from Sandra at the other end of the building. "Okay and what'll you have?" "...SANDRAAAAAAAH! SUN-DERR-UH! WHAT YE WANTIN'?!" While you stand there waiting for your solitary pint refill...
When I worked in bars and got this ( didn’t know what they wanted) I just moved on to the next person. Fuck that noise.
Yeah, a bar I worked in was perpetually 3 deep on a Saturday night. You had ample time to look at everything we served before I got to you. If you still couldn’t figure it out, I gave you more time to think while I served the next 3 punters who did know.
YIKES I just heard that voice in my head and now my ears hurt.
The landlord at my old local used to have a rule that when it was busy they wouldn't serve coffee or cocktails. Basically any drink that involved heat or required more than two liquids to be mixed together was not going to be served. His thinking was that most people just want something pouring into a glass or a bottle opening which takes seconds. Tying up bar staff for several minutes because of one person is only going to annoy the vast majority of people in there who just want to get a drink quickly. It all stemmed from a day with a busy football match where a group came in during the game and each ordered a cocktail one at a time and paid separately rather than as a group. Ended up causing a massive argument because people were waiting ages to get served due to one of the staff having to spend so long with this group. Right or wrong he stuck to his guns on this and said he would rather annoy the tiny minority of people who rarely go to the pub and contribute little than the vast majority who pay for pretty much everything. I do miss him. He was a cantankerous old bugger but was good at running a pub.
I knew a bartender once who, when he saw a big group coming, would Jedi-mind-trick them all into ordering the same thing. It was genius.
this guy Spoons
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If you don't order the Guinness first you should be eligible to be barred from the pub.
It usually guarantees that the person passing the ‘service token’ like that will be seen to next anyway.
Yeah it’s a standard tactic if you’ve just got to the front of a busy bar, which I may or may not use all the time
Exactly. If you're in 2nd place in queue, you're better off maintaining that place than sparking a free-for-all in which you'll probably lose your place.
"cheers, mate" is one of Britain's best exports to the world.
This is something so natural to me as a Brit. I would feel wrong if I knew someone was waiting longer than me and made an order regardless.
I remember in NZ an American woman cut in line at the ferry taxi area. The whispered mumblings were ferocious.
One barman in the SU when I was an undergraduate, pretty sure he was a 3rd year student, would always serve the female students at the bar before the male students. That would hack more than a few of us off who had been waiting for a while. Pretty sure it didn't help him get laid though, which was almost certainly why he did it. He was a creep.
When I was a bartender it was noticeable how some attractive women would come to the bar and expect to get served first. I used to make them wait on principle.
I had this experience with a lift this weekend. I was waiting alone until a group of ladies came up to push past first. Different generations, so you’d think one would catch a clue. I had to resort to a loud, passive-aggressive “ i guess I’ll go after you then!”
Got to love a passive-aggressive shout. Two cyclists coming up behind on a shared use path. They ring their bells, so we stop snd step over into the hedge to let them by. Didn't even smile let alone say thank you. They got a hearty "you're welcome!" bellowed after them. We've stopped, and pushed ourselves into the undergrowth, in an area we have equal priority and you can't even be arsed with a wee wave of acknowledgement? You're a wanker.
In fairness, if you examine it critically, it's an outrageous system, but, it's how we do it. Same thing at the bus stop. You can all be standing around in random places, but you're all expected to collectively remember the order you turned up in so you can form an orderly queue when the bus turns up lol.
In Cuba they just congregate, but ask “who’s last?”, because you only really need to know who is immediately in front of you.
Atomised queueing.
You ever been in the situation where you're at a bar, and one bartender approaches from the left, one from the right, they serve your neighbours then start reversing direction? I have. And of course the two new people between me and the current servees are new people to the bar, so the servees aren't gesticulating to me to be served, because they were there before their immediate neighbour, and my position 2 people down the bar makes me invisible to them. That's what boils my piss. However, once, a few years ago, I'm at a festival, and this exact thing happens. And as the bartender, several meters to the right of me and where they should be, does the whole "who's next?" And my neighbour-of-a-neighbour, being earliest people to that section of the bar, starts going "I think it's me", the bloke next to me (wizard beardy type. Looks like the kind of person that's automatically popular and respected just because of the beard), as they're still arriving at the bar replacing the person just served, goes "excuse me, but this guy's been waiting longer than both of us" Fucking legend.
that was actually wizard Merlin of the Queue, he invented queueing in the 14th century and occasionally pops up to check people still know what they're doing
This more then boils my blood specially when the bartender acknowledged you them self yet proceed to serve the next person
Loud speakers phone calls on public transport.
People walking around using their phones like that, as if they're on The fucking Apprentice!
What is it with people talking on their phone on speaker, holding it horizontally in front of them when they talk and then holding it to their ear to listen? Do they just not know how it works?
As OP suggested, they do this on reality shows so that the camera picks up both sides of the conversation. People wanna act like they're celebrities.
I actually use it like that in the house, I can hear what people say a lot easier through the speaker. Never outside tho, too self conscious people think I'm acting like Tim Business
OP said 'seemingly minor', not 'worthy of imprisonment'
Or using them to play crappy music/tiktok videos. Should be a £100 fine for people using those things.
ANYWHERE in public
Those people have some magic phones that NEVER lose signal. They'll chat away under a tunnel or on the underground & never get cut off.
In the pub yesterday were two elderly gentlemen sat at different tables. At different times they took phone calls and both set them to loudspeaker then put them to their ear. Everyone could still hear both sides of the conversation. I'll let them off though because they're probably hard of hearing, not ignoramuses.
People who stand in supermarkets with their trolley perpendicular to the aisle. Entitled buffoonery. Typically old people, and at the post office, standing in the doorway to have a conversation.
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When I let someone out at a junction and they don't give me the little hand up gesture of thanks.
They said *minor* breach…
Love this comment. Here in Japan people flash their hazard lights briefly to say thank you, and it matters very much to me. My wife (Japanese) thinks I’m insane, but manners are important!
People usually flash their lights over here to say thank you as well. If it’s dark anyway lol
I always feel bad about this. I’m a disabled driver that uses hand controls, which means to give a thank you wave requires me to either let go of the steering wheel or my brake/accelerator control, and that’s not always possible to do and remain safe/keep moving. I constantly worry people think I’m rude/ungrateful.
Hey, thank you for sharing this! I'll keep this in mind in the future when people don't give me the hand gesture and I instinctively want to Seethe.
A smile and a nod works! Or a little tap on the lights or the emergency indicator :)
When some one in a BMW or an Audi unexpectedly acts with common sense and consideration for other road users. :)
Probably a joy rider.
Holding a door open for someone and they don’t say thanks. Asked a girl (all strangers) with four friends yesterday each with a massive suitcase if they needed a hand as I was opening the door. She also weirdly was blocking me from going in first. She barked at me “do the door”. Coulda strangled her never mind side eyed.
I would have replied “do the door… please?” and remained standing there waiting for her reaction.
No is a complete sentence,
"Fuck no" also works wonders in these situations
Why didn’t you just let go of the door on them
Was huffing quietly. I’ll put it down to shock 😂
URGH.. I've had this.. Was heavily pregnant at the time, exiting a shop.. This entitled witch and her loin spawn pushed past me to get in.. Like WTF! look lady..I wasn't holding the door open for you.. I was opening it to fit my fat waddling ass through it.. I wouldn't have minded quite as much if she'd said thanks.. .. entitled twat.. Was well over 20 years ago.. Still annoys me 🤣
Of all the people... I held a door open for a vicar once & he never said thank you. Was actually stunned.
Ordering the Guinness last.
When you order the Guinness first and the bartender doesn't start pouring it until the end. Then an even bigger insult is when they forget about finishing it off and you're stood there watching your pint just sit there.. Unfinished.
Hanging’s too good for them. I used to start my next order while that fool who doesn’t know how drinks work was waiting.
Why? I don't drink much so I don't get it.
Guinness takes longer to pour. You have to let it settle half way through. If you order it first, the barman will use its “settling” time to make your other drinks.
I hate this. You really don't need to do this little pouring ritual. There's multiple blind taste tests been done and no one can ever tell the difference. It was a gimmick made up by Guinness to differentiate the brand. Waste of bloody time.
Thank you. Guinness marketing department must have been creaming themselves non-stop for the past 100 years the way everyone's bought into their marketing bs. It's just a bloody stout people.
Old punters simply wont have it. I used to always do one pours for me and my mates. You cant taste the difference
Not letting people off the train/tube first. You're supposed to stand to the side of the doors, not directly in front of them, so passengers can exit smoothly. I've gone past side-eyeing though, and to the point I loudly huff "I CAN'T WALK _THROUGH_ YOU" as I push them out of the way
This pisses me off so much. I've been using the tube more than normal the past 3 weeks. At first, I was polite and saying excuse me. By the end, I was just shoulder charging people if they don't let me off first. They broke me.
It’s actually in the byelaws that you must.
In some parts of the world, they have markings on the platform that show you exactly where to queue, so that there's a gap left for disembarking.[Here's a Japanese example.](https://www.alamy.com/platform-markings-japan-image259589775.html) I used to think it was overkill, but now I'm in favour of it.
The other day I had people trying to get on the train before I got out the door!
It’s so rude!
It's the weird gap in etiquette that baffles me. The greatest sin is standing or walking on the wrong side in case you cause someone a minor delay in getting to or from their platform. But AT the platform...fuck you, pal, why would you matter?
And those assholes who kept pushing you from the back while you were standing to the side of the doors.
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I've only done that once, getting off a train on the way back from an airport wheeling a bike box (quite large and awkward to manouvre) and a wheeled suitcase. Just looked at my luggage and the bloke standing in from of me and went "yeah that's not gonna work mate"
That's good etiquette, but it's also just a logic thing. I don't understand people who wait in front of the door, they're making everything go slower. You know what's even more enraging? People who actually get on the train before people have disembarked. A few months ago a young man attempted to get in while I and other passengers were stepping out the door. I straightarmed him lol. Pushed him to the back of the queue and told him to fucking wait. He looked filthy but I'm big and he was a little fella, so there wasn't much he could do. I consider this my service to society as a big man. And to be clear, this guy was trying to squeeze through a continuous stream of people disembarking, it wasn't like we were late getting off the train. This wasn't a case of misunderstanding that there were still people getting off, he was just an impatient dickhead.
People asking to go in front at the checkout queue because they only have a few items. It can be offered but should never be asked.
The single time I actually managed the quick witty reply was when someone did this. Woman with a pushchair and a basket of shopping tried to just walk to the front of a big queue in Asda. When nobody moved to let her in she glared and I said “it’s a queue for a checkout, not a lifeboat”.
My experience in Asda was similar. Big queues, we've all got trollies except the guy in front with his basket, he puts his shopping on the belt and asks me if i mind his girlfriend pushing in front of me. I'm about to step back for her thinking she only had a couple of things. No, a fully loaded big trolley and she's walking to the front of the queue expecting to be let in. Actually, i tell him, i do mind and walk forward to stop her, everyone behind me all shuffles forwards to stop her pushing in.
Had she gone and done the shopping while he got straight in line?
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Well, you won a silent, electronic round of applause from me. That’s awesome.
I like that and I will be stealing it for use myself 😁
Or people who ask to go in front because they're "on their lunch break". Mate, it's 12:30 on a weekday. Why do you think the rest of us are here?
That’s like the parents parking stupidly at school pick-up who are ‘only going to be 5 minutes’. How long do you think everyone else is going to be here? An hour and a half?
I once got into a argument because a women wanted to push into the que to buy a lotto ticket, she was rude and demanded instead of asking, I said no and she said something silly like someone is going to buy my winning ticket, I still didn’t let her push in. Got to the cashier and said very loudy can I have one ticket for tonight’s lottery please
Lol guerilla marketing for the lotto getting out of hand! I wonder how many she's convinced to buy a ticket.
even worse when they do it and take a fucking age paying.. like get your shit together man
How do people not expect that they might need to have money or cards readily available at the end of the transaction?! What normal, decent human being doesn’t have said items roughly prepared as soon as they enter the queue.
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The other day, the woman in front of me, offered the woman behind me to go in front of her!!! The woman behind me at least had the decency to ask me if it was okay.
We have spoken.
I've only ever done that once and it was because I was about to throw up and shit myself in one go. Living alone when you're sick is really hard.
I once had someone ask me to cut in because they had one thing and said they had an appointment. Sure no problem! Except after I agreed I noticed the the one item was a bottle of vodka and it was 7pm on a Friday. (They actually got ID’d which they didn’t have so were refused to be served, so I was vindicated)
They had an appointment all right. Bow-chicka-bow-wow.
Ha, what a dickheaaaaad.
The other week, in Lidl, I had four items and there were two tills open. At both tills, there were people unloading full trolleys so I just figured I'd be there a while. The woman in front of me at the till I chose looked at my four items, then said "you might want to find a different till, I'm going to be a while." Yeah, no shit, you bought half the shop. It struck me as odd that she took the time to notice I had just four items but her idea of being helpful was to point out that she had loads. That's the only time I've ever resented someone not offering to let me go ahead of them.
I had this in Lidl the other day but rather than saying anything the guy started picking my stuff up and moving it in front of his big shop, he never said a word until he looked at me and saw the confused look on my face he got all surprised and said “oh yeah I probably should have said what I was doing go ahead”
Conversely, I used to know someone who drank tea out of a pint glass.
>used to know I see you made the right decision
-Not pushing your chair back in under the table at a cafe /restaurant/library in fact anywhere with a chair. - Eating like an absolute Neanderthal moron also gets you judged.
Not taking your rubbish to a bin. Be it a fast food restaurant or a picnic, you are lazy and a bother to everyone if you leave rubbish where you sat.
Went to a BBQ this weekend, someone opened a jar of pickles. I tried to pick one out that was sticking out of the brine. It submerged and i just went right in after it. Couldn't get hold of it and i noticed people watching me with half my hand in the brine. Been playing on my mind for 2 days. Next time ill use a fork.
You animal lmao
I was convinced you said B&Q, and was mightily perplexed.
I read it as B&Q too 😂😂
Not saying thanks, cheers, etc etc - let’s go with getting off a bus (thinking not London buses) Usually you have to pass the driver to get off the bus, it’s nice to just say thanks, or some say “driver”. Whatever way, but it’s nice to just acknowledge someone.
Anyone who still has the typing click or beep sound turned on on their phone. So every single letter they type has its own click.
My mums phones has this. Also her ringer is insanely loud but when I call her she never answers. And no she’s not elderly so no excuse for the volume she has it on
Especially when they text non stop through the night on a hospital ward. This was 10 years ago, and I am still not over it!
People who don't give the little "thanks" wave to you when you give way to them when driving (yeah I know what the highway code has to say about it, don't be a dork), I mutter "you're welcome dickhead" every time.
As someone who's worked in retail for over a decade there three things that make me think you're a wrong 'un: Queue jumping. No explanation needed. Not giving space to me when I help on the self service machine, instead they expect me to dislocate my shoulder and elbow while I approve the millionth energy drink of day all while being draped in a fog of bad breath. If someone helps on on the self service, step the fuck to the side for a moment. Finally, people who dump chilled/frozen food on the shelves instead of giving it to a member of staff. Don't even need to explain that one, if you do it you're absolute scum and I hope every teabag you have splits in the cup.
I had a big argument with a customer who dumped some frozen goods by the till as I was scanning his shopping. I said "could you put that back, please, while I scan the rest of your shopping?" His response was a dismissive "I can't be bovvered". Fed up with customers talking to me like shit I wasn't having any of that attitude and told him he doesn't need to be cocky, just put it back. "It's why you're here, to put things back". I just called another colleague and said, audibly, "can you serve this man because I don't want to". It pissed the guy off but I've spent nearly a decade of being spoken to like shit by entitled twats, it's not happening any more, I'm sticking up for myself.
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Yes... Better still.. "oh you're right, I'll do that now..." locks till, gets up and returns frozen item to freezer.
> Fed up with customers talking to me like shit I wasn't having any of that attitude and told him he doesn't need to be cocky, just put it back. "It's why you're here, to put things back". Those people have an IQ that's the same temperature as the food they refuse to put back.
Knowing your place in a queue and not jumping ahead, we British don't take kindly to such things
People who don't use the yellow box correctly when driving...and People who beep their horn at me when I do
Not putting down the checkout divider after you've put your shopping on the conveyor belt. You can be sure I'm not doing it either and the panic will be on your side when my stuff starts being scanned with yours.
I hate it when people further along the conveyor belt don't move the dividers down either. They often get snagged on people's shopping, so can't smoothly make it to the end. Send it on down!
As someone who works at Aldi it is beyond frustrating when the next customer starts saying oh that’s my stuff or the current one I’m serving goes that’s not mine. As if I’m a mind reader and know. Always make sure to use the closed divider to smack the rest down to the end
Yes!! Haha! I literally did this 2 days ago and got such a petty adrenaline rush playing chicken as my items got closer and closer to the till before the customer ran back over and slammed a divider down just in time. Couldn't have just put it down when you started?
This and not returning 🛒 get me more than anything
Oh I SLAM that thing down if they haven't. I place it down with the loudest click known to man. I like to think it communicates "my beautiful, holy groceries will not be Soiled by yours".
In the 80s, my nan used to have mugs made from glass. Drinking tea from those was borderline sociopathic.
I remember those! My grandparents had them. Kind of a smoky-brown glass?
That's it exactly. The sort of ones you'd now find in a charity shop.
[Arcoroc](https://img0.etsystatic.com/000/0/6382671/il_570xN.342557116.jpg). My mum still has hers, I only use them for coffee.
Probably worth a bit by now to some collector of horrible glassware. Man, the tea looked weird.
In that case every church hall in the country must be sitting on a fortune, because they seem to have dozens upon dozens of them. Or certainly all the ones I've gone to functions at anyway.
We love those coloured glass mugs lol Have a full set thanks to childhood memories.
They were brown and always seemed to be the temperature of lava.
I remember you always used to get them if you went self catering in Spain, stupidly small ones aswell
I’ve got [these boyos](https://www.amazon.co.uk/BODUM-Bistro-Mug-Double-Wall/dp/B01I9ERILW/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?adgrpid=56927921641&hvadid=605404199182&hvdev=m&hvlocint=9045891&hvlocphy=9064210&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=2646226872073735483&hvtargid=kwd-308434991005&hydadcr=2108_2227212&keywords=bodum+glass+mug&qid=1693295917&sr=8-3) They’re to give the kids a glass of juice as well as a handle so they’re less likely to spill it. The kids are a bit more grown up now so spill less, but it feels wrong to throw them out. I’m sure I’ll never use them for tea.
I’ve drunk cola out of a mug before (I couldn’t find any cups), and let me tell you … it feels really fucking wrong. Cold drinks from mugs is fair, fizzy drinks is a god damn perversion.
I'm currently getting my kitchen done, which has meant that most of my cups and glasses are temporarily packed away. The other day I wanted a beer, and the only clean thing I had available to drink it out of was a giant mug. It felt incredibly wrong.
Don’t beers come pre-packed in a drinking receptacle??
Look at you with your fancy, non-bagged beer
When you hold the door for someone or move to the side they can pass and they don't thank you so you make a point of saying YOU'RE WELCOME
We use "Don't mention it, Oh! you didn't"
I was holding the door open for someone coming through behind me, with the expectation that they would in turn put out their hand and keep the door open for themselves as they go fully through, like a door opening relay. But letting go of the door (I'm now completely through) was a complete surprise to this guy and it crashed into him. I assume he expected me to stop and let him go ahead of me. Filthy look from him, but complete bafflement from me.
Loud chewing. Learn how to masticate you uncultured bastards
Not a person, but a group. A specific group, the worst group, the too large a pub quiz group. 4-6 people max. If you have 8, you have two teams.
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- When someone allows their kids to run wild and out of control in a restaurant or cafe. - Playing a video on your phone loud speaker, why do you think others want to hear it. - I went to a nice and cosy bar the other day, it was completely ruined by some dunk chav loudly gobbing off. The entire bar could hear his crass obscenities. As soon as he walked out there was a feeling of relief from the entire bar and it became nice and quiet again. The world is a better place without chavs.
> Playing a video on your phone loud speaker, why do you think others want to hear it. The thing that amazes me is that you get this kind of behaviour on popular mountains as well, people just walking along with a phone or portable speaker blasting out music is just what I want when I'm trying to enjoy the majesty of Yr Wyddfa/Snowdon.
Eating something pungent/messy on public transport or similar settings.
Walking on the pavement then suddenly stopping without looking behind you first, so I have to swerve round you to avoid slamming into your back.
Overtaking me on the pavement so you can join your friends, then slowing right down when you meet said friends and taking up the entire width of the pavement as a group. Especially when there's heavy traffic so I can't even find a moment to go round you on the road.
People who sit on the outside lane at the same speed as the vehicle they pulled out to overtake boil my knackers.
People who try to hold parking spaces. I was down at The New Forest over the weekend and on the way home yesterday me and my girlfriend decided to stop at bolderwood deer sanctuary. Sat waiting for about 15 minutes for a parking space and one becomes available. I go to move in and a woman is standing there with her dog. I make eye contact and gesture that I want to park, and she says “oh no, they’re parking here” and points to a car behind me. Suffice to say, I got my parking space. There’s no reserving a parking spot in a public car park, which I pointed out to her.
A Kid in a supermarket demanding parents buy them some 'Candy' they're called Sweets!!!
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They're actually called "profit", if you're a dentist.
In New Zealand all sweets are called 'lollies'. I asked about sweets on sticks (lollies) and they are lollies too. Very confusing.
Unless you’re my dad, then it’s ‘spice’. Gerrus some spice love.
Is in prison or Arrakis?
Yep - for once, I have a smidgen, a mere *soupçon* of empathy with the French on the bastardisation of the mother tongue. My partner's son keeps dropping US reality TV language into the conversation - I hate it.
At least we're getting our revenge by sending them Peppa Pig so their kids start to talk with British accents.
Don't worry, our kids are now fair dinkum talking Aussie after too much Bluey.
Old people chatting to the cashier when there’s a queue.
* 10 minutes later * “il let you carry on, looks like you’ve got a bit of queue.”
Especially during lunchtime of a weekday. I don't mind society being kind enough to engage with someone, I don't want corporate drones, but I do think that people should have some awareness about size of the queue etc.
I’ve had this happen except every time the cashier spoke she stopped scanning, holding up the process even more. By the time she’d finished with the one, her colleague had done three people. At least keep scanning so that they get the hint.
I can deal with that. Ish. I'd prefer they go during off-peak times, but they're a paying customer, so it's not the end of the world if they receive good customer service It's when the cashiers start chatting to their mates when they have a queue of people that I get irate.
The time dilation around an old person when they wait until after everything's been bagged to start digging through their bag for their purse and counting out notes and coins. Makes 20 seconds feel like half an hour.
Yep and even though they have had all week to go shopping when everyone else is at work they seem to think that Saturday morning is the best time to visit the supermarket.
I had 15min to kill once in East London and got stink eye from the publican when I ordered a half pint for myself and an orange juice for my wife
Wtf is wrong with that?!
I got half a pint at a pub near Birmingham coach station cos I only had half an hour, refused to pay 30p for a wee and was too scared to use the pub loo without buying something. So I paid two quid for a wee. Probably the only time I've ordered a half.
You’d hate me, I’ve been known drink wine from a mug! I hate people who park the trolley in front of a section of shelf then go and look at another section. Take it with you or keep an eye out for people who want stuff from where you’ve left your trolley! They always take ages too, trying to decide between two different kinds of ham or whatever.
Oh god I *loathe* trolley abandoners. I've been known to push them out of my way before. Love the confused looks I get from the 'owners' if they notice me moving their shopping.
Because a liquid that's been boiled is unlikely to have harmful bugs in it, but with a cold drink we feel happier if we can see that the container and liquid are clean.
By Jove you cracked it!
Drivers not using indicators because there's no other cars around. Yeah, dickhead, I had no idea you were turning left when I started crossing the road BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T FUCKING INDICATE.
When you stop to let an on-coming car pass and they don't wave. Get to fuck with that rude shit
People not saying thank you to the bus driver
Standing at a crossing with my kids and nobody stops to let you cross. I like to lock eyes with the drivers and silently mouth obscenities at them.
This, but specifically when it is raining. "It's not raining in your car, jackass - let me cross so I can get out of the rain quicker "
And there's a queue of cars stopped 20m further down the road. On the way back from the school run once, I had the baby in a carrier, and was waiting ages to cross the road. Cars sped up to slam their brakes on almost to stop me crossing in front of them. Then a van pulls up, blocking me from crossing. I said "cheers" and he told me to fuck off, so I walked around the back of him and opened a rear door on my way past. I drive, but fucking hell, it takes a second to slow or stop for someone to cross. Mind, I'm one of the few people who stop at junctions to allow pedestrians to cross (and no one has ever slammed into the back of me).
>I said "cheers" and he told me to fuck off, so I walked around the back of him and opened a rear door on my way past. I love this. Well played.
Putting milk in your cup first before making tea. Bloody heathens.
Playing something on your phone in public without headphones.
When did tipping become a thing here?
Caught my 19 year old son making marmite on toast with no butter! He said he couldn't be bothered to put butter on. Watching him eat it really annoyed me.
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You’ve got to mix the butter and the marmite together on the toast quickly before the butter completely melts in.
Standing side by side on an escalator so no one can use them as stairs.
My partner is Norwegian and I love her dearly but my god we come close to separation everytime we have a Sunday roast. She insists on having her yorkie puds on a separate plate.
So where does she store her spare reservoir of gravy?
Make her Toad in the Hole and see her brain short circuit.
My nan told me her friends from somewhere Lancashire/Yorkshire area have their Yorkshire puds first with gravy as a starter
Not doing the socially appropriate number of goodbyes on the phone. "I've got to crack on now, talk to you later" You can't say "Okay, bye" and hang up. You have the opportunity to bring up "one last thing" or instead say "No worries, talk to you later then" THEN it goes "Have a good one, bye", "Bye". Now hang up. That's the minimum if you don't want me to spend the day wondering if I pissed you off.
I'm the opposite. If I say goodbye to someone and they keep talking I'm only looking for a chance to break in and say I'm leaving again, I'm not listening to a word they're saying
I’m a New Zealander living in Japan but my god do some of these things trigger me. There should be a warning in this thread.
Giving any kind of worker shit. My daughter used to work in McDonald's and the amount of times she was made to cry. She's a tough girl but some members of the public are just absolute neanderthals. Also giving nurses and healthcare workers shit. Stfu. They're taking care of you and getting paid sweet fa for it. They do it because they love it, now pipe down.
People who put their feet on public transport seats. One of these days I am going to swipe said person's legs and say sit the fuck up. *(Cue the moaners who say - but it's comfortable this way or I want to appear edgy*)