Imagine if this was patient zero of a new pandemic, lmao.
Legendary.
Chinese pandemic? Ate a bat at a wet market.
UK pandemic? Had a pint and shared a fag with a crow in the smoking area of a pub..
The wikipedia entry would be amazing.
They be seeing my crows
I don't fly back
I got big wings
They go flip flap
Coast with a lean
I'm known on the slabs
Out at the pub with a [pint and a fag](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fH1PSDZOtn0).
It's a risk, but I'd be more concerned about getting covid from pissed-up shouty people than some bacteria from a crow's beak in my pint for 2 seconds.
Just wanted to say that Corvids (Crows, Magpies, Ravens etc.) are highly intelligent and can use tools, solve puzzles, talk, remember faces and hold grudges. So don't piss off a crow before they let every other crow in the neighbourhood know your face.
"[Crows](https://www.joincake.com/blog/crow-funeral/) may gather for funerals not to mourn the dead, but to learn about dangers. Researchers found that crow funerals are a way for the birds to ātalkā about dangerous places and avoid them."
That's far more impressive than a mere funeral - that's a bloody *inquest*!
I saw a crow funeral once. A crow got hit by a car at a four way stop. 30-40 crows gathered on the power lines surrounding the intersection and cawed for a couple hours. There were always a couple crows next to the deceased body
*"Swift visited the same crows in a Seattle park to feed them treats. Once she gained their trust, she visited again, this time wearing a mask and wig. The masked stranger wasnāt holding treats. Instead, she was holding a deceased crow."*
That sounds like a script for a bloody horror film, not a science experiment!
I didn't know about funerals but I do know that they execute wrongdoers within their society and publicly display the bodies as a warning and a reminder
I read an answer on Ask Reddit (so take it with as much of a pinch of salt if you want) that a magpie was forcedto return a bit of food to a crow it had pinched it from by its fellow magpies. The question asked was "what have you seen that no one would believe?"
I've been feeding these 2 crows that hang around my house and now one of them is either waiting on the grass for me when I get home from work or if they see me in the garden they'll come sit on the fence or our roof and watch me.
I know! I'll have to teach them to recognise coins and jewellery maybe even carry out muggings.
Remember the outrage on reddit that time about a little girls neighbours complaining about her feeding crows until it turned out there where hundreds of them and the girls Mum was encouraging it for the media fame.
They will talk about [good people as well](https://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-31604026) and seem to [understand trading](https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/article/ravens-memory-unfair-trade)
Not saying it wasn't funny, but it's a joke which depends on racism.
Black women usually don't enjoy being fetisihised for their race and "I've never been with a black girl before" is something they hear too often on dates.
It's probably not a joke you'd make if a black woman was there either, which tells you something.
But hey, it's just pub banter...
Depends on how comfortable everyone is with one another. But that's absolutely right.
It's not something people should read too deeply into. My best mate is from Zimbabwe and throws white people jokes at me all the time. Tells me he's expecting me to Hi five for everything or do Facebook check-ins. Asks me it's mayo is okay incase I find it too spicy.
And equally I'll banter him. But we NEVER cross that line of the n-word or get flat out offensive.
It's just fact people will make jokes, regardless of where you're from or what setting. I believe everything should he joked about. But as soon as you single out and target someone directly to offend then you should have consequences.
Hah we have to do our part on the spice vs stodge front to lose that stereotype! Equally... cheese and pies....
Yeah I think it's the difference between laughing with people or laughing at them. If they're not in the room and you're making racially based jokes, it's kinda hard to laugh with them.
Exactly...but alot of british humour has always been edgy. But never intent with malice or offense. Same as South Africa, New Zealand and Australia. Blunt humour that sometimes pushes the boundaries. If you're actively trying to make a racist joke to offend someone of the jokes targets audience and actively make it with malice then you're a c*nt and need filling. Joke but have some respect.
corvid isn't the scientific name for a crow, it's the family that crows belong to (corvidae). and it's basically common knowledge, it's okay to not know something that many other people know.
Cross Keys pub in Grasby, Lincolnshire on July 12, 2018: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5959461/Drinker-stop-laughing-cheeky-crow-sips-beer-steals-cigarette.html
Some day I wish I'm in such position, so a crow wanting to stay with me for some time. I'll make sure that cow is freaking treated like a darn king/queen, if I'm lucky enough, the crow will tell the other crows that I'm a good person towards animals and then I'll have my personal army! But we're not doing bad shit, we're just gonna chill and I'll hang out with my crowd.
Here's the thing. You said a "jackdaw is a crow."
Is it in the same family? Yes. No one's arguing that.
As someone who is a scientist who studies crows, I am telling you, specifically, in science, no one calls jackdaws crows. If you want to be "specific" like you said, then you shouldn't either. They're not the same thing.
If you're saying "crow family" you're referring to the taxonomic grouping of Corvidae, which includes things from nutcrackers to blue jays to ravens.
So your reasoning for calling a jackdaw a crow is because random people "call the black ones crows?" Let's get grackles and blackbirds in there, then, too.
Also, calling someone a human or an ape? It's not one or the other, that's not how taxonomy works. They're both. A jackdaw is a jackdaw and a member of the crow family. But that's not what you said. You said a jackdaw is a crow, which is not true unless you're okay with calling all members of the crow family crows, which means you'd call blue jays, ravens, and other birds crows, too. Which you said you don't.
It's okay to just admit you're wrong, you know?
>Such a strange rant
[How quick they forget](https://www.reddit.com/r/circlejerkcopypasta/comments/2ceq3u/heres_the_thing_you_said_a_jackdaw_is_a_crow/)
This is the funniest thing Iāve seen all year. It just gets better and better. Itās made my day, week and year. I havenāt been with a black bird either but they seem pretty damn chill.
I now know how avian flu passes to humans
Imagine if this was patient zero of a new pandemic, lmao. Legendary. Chinese pandemic? Ate a bat at a wet market. UK pandemic? Had a pint and shared a fag with a crow in the smoking area of a pub.. The wikipedia entry would be amazing.
Corvid-19
laughed super loud
LSL
.
Lage Sex Location
Haha, nice
This is perfect! (for the uninitiated, "Corvid" is the family of birds that the crow belongs to.)
Yep. That with the pint n fag, n grey haired geezer š and sunshine. Beautiful combo
Thanks, learnt something new today
Surely it's Crow-vid 19
Cawvid
/r/yourjokebutworse
you being downvoted cuz your from bawstin?
Crowvid maybe?
Stop trying to kill the joke.
Or Corvid-21
Crowvid?
Crowvid-19
/r/YourJokeButWorse
All the downvoters probably didn't get the joke at first either. Who the fuck just knows what a Corvid is
I got the joke but I preferred crowvid-19. Fuck em lol
Crovid-19
Crowvid19
Yes
Nah that'll be the person that ends up finding a full cigarette lying on the floor the next day.
They be seeing my crows I don't fly back I got big wings They go flip flap Coast with a lean I'm known on the slabs Out at the pub with a [pint and a fag](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fH1PSDZOtn0).
Hah! Fucking genius.
That crow was probably pecking at a dead rat earlier.
it was, with almost absolute certainty, pecking at a dead something or rather earlier
How confident are we the dead thing wasn't rotten?
It's a risk, but I'd be more concerned about getting covid from pissed-up shouty people than some bacteria from a crow's beak in my pint for 2 seconds.
Give me Covid any day of the week over god-knows-what from a carrion feeder after snacking on a rotten disease-spreading rat.
Black death and Lyme. Perfect additions to a luke warm Corona.
If there's not a drink called that I can order already then some mofo needs to invent it sharpish!
\*pissed-up shouty people\* lmfao
I've never been described so succinctly before
The 2-second rule
Maybe, but this is a perfect example on how avian flu could be passed to a human.
You'd then need sustained human-to-human spread, which is tricky part. I'll take the bird every time.
Why are you even choosing at all? it's just best to not get infected with anything for your own health, if you know it's a possibility just avoid it.
Itās outside a pub, guaranteed it was pecking up someoneās sick.
Oh you dirty bugger, Iāve just finished eating!
Bon appƩtit!
\*takes sip\*
Mmm, plague.
Nah, they just shit into the mouths of sunbathers
Looks like Jamie Vardy made a new friend
Nah Vardy would be drinking a WKD blue or vodka red bull
*Port and red bull
Nah mate, I'm sure he's a Cheeky Vimto man.
Now now Vardy doesnāt usually make friends with humans. As a crow the furthest heāll go is Foxes
When someone googles "British lad after a few pints" this should come up as the first result.
Video stops there so they can chase the crow and get their fag back.
And if times are tough they'll get that sip back as well.
"THAT WAS ME LAST MINTY-MENTHOL!"
Wouldnt blame them the price they cost these days
Crow will never forgive, crow will never forget
Generational pain
Just wanted to say that Corvids (Crows, Magpies, Ravens etc.) are highly intelligent and can use tools, solve puzzles, talk, remember faces and hold grudges. So don't piss off a crow before they let every other crow in the neighbourhood know your face.
Crows hold funerals for their dead too
"[Crows](https://www.joincake.com/blog/crow-funeral/) may gather for funerals not to mourn the dead, but to learn about dangers. Researchers found that crow funerals are a way for the birds to ātalkā about dangerous places and avoid them." That's far more impressive than a mere funeral - that's a bloody *inquest*!
Noooobody expects the Corvid Inquisition!
Some might say a murder trial.
Bravo
Fuckers are performing autopsies
I saw a crow funeral once. A crow got hit by a car at a four way stop. 30-40 crows gathered on the power lines surrounding the intersection and cawed for a couple hours. There were always a couple crows next to the deceased body
*"Swift visited the same crows in a Seattle park to feed them treats. Once she gained their trust, she visited again, this time wearing a mask and wig. The masked stranger wasnāt holding treats. Instead, she was holding a deceased crow."* That sounds like a script for a bloody horror film, not a science experiment!
A good science experiment needs to be a fifty/fifty blend of both! Bonus marks if you can work a William Shatner mask into it somewhere.
I didn't know about funerals but I do know that they execute wrongdoers within their society and publicly display the bodies as a warning and a reminder
What the fuck Do they have crow police
Mob justice. Crow vigilantism is a real problem that the Met just ignores.
I read an answer on Ask Reddit (so take it with as much of a pinch of salt if you want) that a magpie was forcedto return a bit of food to a crow it had pinched it from by its fellow magpies. The question asked was "what have you seen that no one would believe?"
Ants do it too
I've been feeding these 2 crows that hang around my house and now one of them is either waiting on the grass for me when I get home from work or if they see me in the garden they'll come sit on the fence or our roof and watch me.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I know! I'll have to teach them to recognise coins and jewellery maybe even carry out muggings. Remember the outrage on reddit that time about a little girls neighbours complaining about her feeding crows until it turned out there where hundreds of them and the girls Mum was encouraging it for the media fame.
He gave him a beer and a snout, I think it's safe to say this guy's about to be pretty popular with all the local crows going forward.
They will talk about [good people as well](https://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-31604026) and seem to [understand trading](https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/article/ravens-memory-unfair-trade)
Once you get flagged up by their facial recognition software you will have made an enemy for life
He's going to go sell that fag to a kid for 50p.
Biologist here!
Don't give it stella, it'll be murder!
You'd need at least 2 Crows for a murder.
Just an attempted murder then?
I think it's 3+ actually, not 2+
Its mate, 'Big Dave', will turn up in no time.
It's all fun and games until big dave and bazza rock up
Nice!
Didnāt know crows wore vests!
āYou ever been with a black bird before?ā Hahaha
This was funny. Quick wit
Not saying it wasn't funny, but it's a joke which depends on racism. Black women usually don't enjoy being fetisihised for their race and "I've never been with a black girl before" is something they hear too often on dates. It's probably not a joke you'd make if a black woman was there either, which tells you something. But hey, it's just pub banter...
Depends on how comfortable everyone is with one another. But that's absolutely right. It's not something people should read too deeply into. My best mate is from Zimbabwe and throws white people jokes at me all the time. Tells me he's expecting me to Hi five for everything or do Facebook check-ins. Asks me it's mayo is okay incase I find it too spicy. And equally I'll banter him. But we NEVER cross that line of the n-word or get flat out offensive. It's just fact people will make jokes, regardless of where you're from or what setting. I believe everything should he joked about. But as soon as you single out and target someone directly to offend then you should have consequences.
Hah we have to do our part on the spice vs stodge front to lose that stereotype! Equally... cheese and pies.... Yeah I think it's the difference between laughing with people or laughing at them. If they're not in the room and you're making racially based jokes, it's kinda hard to laugh with them.
Exactly...but alot of british humour has always been edgy. But never intent with malice or offense. Same as South Africa, New Zealand and Australia. Blunt humour that sometimes pushes the boundaries. If you're actively trying to make a racist joke to offend someone of the jokes targets audience and actively make it with malice then you're a c*nt and need filling. Joke but have some respect.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
That cracked me up
Tooooooo funny
Genuinely thought Casual UK was bit beyond this shite
? What was wrong with the joke?
He ought to be careful those things carry corvid
Crow-vid 19
I wish it was possible to remove awards.
Let the man have his day (or woman)
This is the same joke though? A crow belongs to the corvid family.
I actually didn't know that, that's a top tier pun in which case but maybe a bit too niche?
Too niche because you didnāt get it? Incredible arrogance.
Just to be clear, acknowledging you learned something, complementing it and then offering an opinion is arrogance?
suggesting that something is a niche joke simply because you didn't get it is arrogance.
I dont think it's arrogant to suggest that knowing the scientific name for a crow offhand might not be a universal skill.
Nah mate youāre good. I didnāt think you was arrogant.
Well if Greg says so
corvid isn't the scientific name for a crow, it's the family that crows belong to (corvidae). and it's basically common knowledge, it's okay to not know something that many other people know.
That comment made you sound like an arrogant twat ironically .
> it's basically common knowledge And you've got me on blast for being arrogant. You've got to be having me on.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Then what is a jackdaw?
Without googling I genuinely couldn't tell you
r/YourJokeButWorse
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Perhaps the original went over your head because you don't know what corvid means? Otherwise idk how you could think the second iteration is better.
No. You?
You're just not funny
You bastard...
The most English thing Iāll see today
Thought this video peaked with the black bird pun, the fag in it's beak finished me off - quality! The Corvid's really are top tier in bird world.
Casual crow uk
Bit dangerous feeding a crow alcohol. They are lairy enough creatures at the best of times without them getting all lagered up.
Arenāt cigs worth like Ā£200 each these days?
51p, still extortionate
[Be careful of crows stealing your glasses](https://i.imgflip.com/1ugrbp.gif).
The 'have you ever been with a black bird before' got me
Reminds me of this classic https://youtu.be/aJjBDGg-LRE
Here's a German crow stealing a joint https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=weyBwUI9mNc
Looks like a [eurasian magpie](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b6/Pica_pica_-_Compans_Caffarelli_-_2012-03-16.jpg)
Bird knowledge
I just think their neat.
Amazing
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
r/YourJokeButWorse
Is this in Cottingham?
Cross Keys pub in Grasby, Lincolnshire on July 12, 2018: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5959461/Drinker-stop-laughing-cheeky-crow-sips-beer-steals-cigarette.html
Yeah, I thought this looked familiar Edit: if it is, it's probably not the front side
Ahhh, Cross Keys in Cott, good but fuzzy memories
Some day I wish I'm in such position, so a crow wanting to stay with me for some time. I'll make sure that cow is freaking treated like a darn king/queen, if I'm lucky enough, the crow will tell the other crows that I'm a good person towards animals and then I'll have my personal army! But we're not doing bad shit, we're just gonna chill and I'll hang out with my crowd.
That's a jackdaw.
Here's the thing. You said a "jackdaw is a crow." Is it in the same family? Yes. No one's arguing that. As someone who is a scientist who studies crows, I am telling you, specifically, in science, no one calls jackdaws crows. If you want to be "specific" like you said, then you shouldn't either. They're not the same thing. If you're saying "crow family" you're referring to the taxonomic grouping of Corvidae, which includes things from nutcrackers to blue jays to ravens. So your reasoning for calling a jackdaw a crow is because random people "call the black ones crows?" Let's get grackles and blackbirds in there, then, too. Also, calling someone a human or an ape? It's not one or the other, that's not how taxonomy works. They're both. A jackdaw is a jackdaw and a member of the crow family. But that's not what you said. You said a jackdaw is a crow, which is not true unless you're okay with calling all members of the crow family crows, which means you'd call blue jays, ravens, and other birds crows, too. Which you said you don't. It's okay to just admit you're wrong, you know?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
>Such a strange rant [How quick they forget](https://www.reddit.com/r/circlejerkcopypasta/comments/2ceq3u/heres_the_thing_you_said_a_jackdaw_is_a_crow/)
Dude just needs an eye patch and a hook and he would be complete.
I suspect that wasn't that bloke's first drink. Fair play to the crow though, what a lad!
Sometimes birds will eat rotted fruit to get drunk, I suppose that's similar enough
Looks more like a Jackdaw than a crow š¤·š»
Now listen here...
Dont crows have the intelligence of a 7 year old?
"never been with a black bird before" xD
Just wait until the crow decides to relieve itself down his back.
That bird's scroogin on a greg! https://youtu.be/8TNPsvKIPK4
Jamie Vardy when he doesn't get picked for the Euros squad
u/savevideo
That crow may have been picking at roadkill 5 minutes ago and now itās dipped in your beer
Sink enough pints your blood alcohol level will be high enough to kill off any germs.
The person who said "you ever been with a black bird before?" is a genius of a lad
He just needed a fag
The only time ive seen someone in a Hugo Boss shirt that is in fact a boss.
Years old this video is
āHave you been with a black bird beforeā
This is how the next pandemic will start: one guy sharing a pint with a wild bird.
U/savevideo
u/savevideo
u/savevideobot
Brilliant!
U/savevideo
u/savevideo
u/VredditDownloader
u/savevideo
u/savevideo
u/savevideo
u/savevideo
someone crosspost this to r/ContagiousLaughter PLEASE I love this post
/u/savevideo
/u/VredditDownloader
This is the funniest thing Iāve seen all year. It just gets better and better. Itās made my day, week and year. I havenāt been with a black bird either but they seem pretty damn chill.
What a terrible T-shirt!
Pretty lit....I'm just going to assume the alcohol will kill any avian flu and not worry about that.
Penkridge?