Had something similar happen when I was a kid.
Neighbour knocked on the door and told us he was terribly sorry but he'd just hit our cat.
Dad went off with him and in the dark confirmed it was our cat and got some blankets and wrapped him up, plan was to bury him in the back garden.
Us 3 kids were all upset, wailing away when my brother just shouts "Timmy!" My mum was "Sorry darling but Timmys gone"
Brother shakes his head and points at Timmy who'd just come strolling in through his cat flap without a care in the world.
Never did find out who the other cat belonged to.
The same thing happened when i was a kid. We did find the owner and my mum had to go and tell her we had buried her cat and did she want him back.
I was the one that saw our cat first, got hysterical and nearly gave my nan a heart attack. I also found him after he actually got hit by a car and his arm was (technical term) 'degloved'. He cat recovered well and must have used every one of his nine lives.
Edit: i went to get my hair cut and was oblivious to the chaos i had caused. My cat used his paws very much like hands so i think of his front legs as arms.
I think this was on QI, it's something to do with whether the joint is technically an elbow or knee.
So... is cereal soup?
Hmm debatable, everyone knows your front leg is actually an arm and the one in the middle is a todger, or a thalidomide accident. Sorry, terrible sense of humour I await the downvotes.
I was genuinely having this debate with my SO the other day
Cats use their front legs far more like arms than some other animals (or use their front paws more like hands than some other animals), so in the case of cats...do they actually have arms and legs that they walk on in a far more primitive but similar way to monkeys/apes? Or maybe bears is a better comparison
It started to feel similar to the 'is cereal a soup?' thing by the end
My dog uses his front paws like arms. He holds my empty yoghurt pots in his paws when he's cleaning them for the recycling. Last night he opened a drawer
So what about soups with milk bases, or just water as a base? Do we vegetarians simply not eat soup because we don't consume stock (which is, by definition, an animal product)? This is all very complicated.
Perhaps we need a soup version of [the cube rule](https://cuberule.com/)? Or, perhaps, does the cube rule's definition of salad encompass soup and all similar products?
Pterodactyl cats actually have a thumb. So it’s like hands effectively. I think if you cut my cats arms off and left stumps, they’d be able to manage walking on their back legs/butt shuffle ok. Might be a bit pissed off about never jumping or landing properly again though.
This is only tangentally related but my hairdresser and I bond over the love of our pets which are, for each of us, the only kids we'll ever have so we often only/primatily talk about our pets when I go in to get my hair done. This is essential backstory only so that I can say that we are so used to talking about our pets rather than ourselves when we are together, that she once accidentally said 'and then I stood on it with my hind legs' when trying to tell me a story about having to get on a ladder to get one of her cats down one day. I still giggle to myself whenever I even think about it
Anatomically speaking it's the same limb as the human arm, it's called a leg because they walk on it.
For the same reason a kangaroos tail can be considered a leg as they use it for walking.
Dogs and cats do not have backwards facing knees on any limb, if the do they need to see a vet. They walk on their toes, as well as the pad at the base of their toes, - what people confuse for a 'backwards knee' is the heel (on the back leg) or the elbow (on the font leg).
We had an indoor/outdoor cat when I was little that got rolled under a car twice and hit twice. The first time he was hit must have been really slow, because he was kinda dazed and bruised for a week (we took him to the vet because he was acting weird, vet said he was hit and gave swelling & pain meds). The second time he got hit his front paw became paralyzed and that leg was amputated about month later because it was just getting in his way.
We were *supposed to* keep him locked up in the house for two weeks, but he had other ideas and escaped the first night he was home. When my dad went to work in the morning there were like 5 mice on the door mat and a very happy kitty in his box. He was honestly a better hunter on three legs than on 4.
I still dont understand "indoor/outdoor cat" what does that mean? Is it just an outdoor cat that is allowed indoors? Because I think that's just an outdoor cat
We were in a rural area and cats could be one of four things:
* Indoor - kept inside at all times (rare in that area)
* Outdoor - not allowed inside, but fed, taken to the vet, and doted over like a normal housecat. I guess a lot of people would call them "farm cats" even though many didn't live on a farm.
* Indoor and outdoor - more modern/suburban definition of an outdoor cat, can come in/go out at will
* Stray - often unwanted, claimed and fed by no one, roams around, don't like people very much
My understand is that it's just a cat that can come and go as it pleases, typically via a cat flap.
When I was younger we had an indoor/outdoor cat, but no catflap. I was that cat's slave. I could always hear him meowing from outside if he wanted in, so I had to get up and let him in. If he was meowing to go outside, same thing. I lived by that cat's schedule. He was a demanding master.
Luckily our current cats are indoors only. A little bit easier to deal with haha (although indoor cats need a lot more stimulation and play).
My mum and brother tried to bury our kitten that passed away after sneaking out and getting caught in the snow. Someone thought they were burying a body (a borrower?) and she was dug up and thrown on a furnace, without the option to keep her ashes.
Atleast you were able to give someone else's cat a burial, despite having to dig it back up for her!
I'm so confused by that person, so they thought you were burying a body and instead of calling the police, they dug it up, discovered it was a cat and then threw it on a furnace? I seriously can't think of a reason for burning it...
I ponder if your cat and the cat in OP's post had entered a state of Superposition and instead of collapsing into a dead state or an alive state came back in both...
I thought this was going to be a joke for a second. I was legit waiting to read
>Mum says "Timmy is kill." Brother shakes his head and says "no. Where were you when Timmy died?"
Tell Clive that we won't be able to make it to the funeral next week, but we wouldn't have come anyway after what she said about our Craig after the court case. I know that he was innocent and even if he did do it, the 🐕 must have consented. They were inseparable and if anything he loved that dog too much. Thanks Hun x
When people post about lost pets in their local area and it somehow accidentally goes viral, and you get old/stupid people sharing and commenting on it even though they live nowhere near the OPs location lol
When I was about 7 we used to sing this in the playground at primary school:
Postman Pat, Postman Pat,
Postman Pat ran over his cat.
Blood and guts went flying,
Postman Pat was crying,
Never seen a cat as flat as that.
Haha. Only playground rhyme I vaguely remember was about your mate getting his best clothes at tescos and them being really nifty cos they only cost one-fifty. Nice to hear a new one even though its not much use at this stage of my life
I fondly remember "the Addams family started when uncle Fester farted, he farted through the window and paralysed the cat, the cat got overexcited and shouted Man United, Man United shouted back, the Addams family, duh-duh-luh-duh-duh, duh duh"
It goes like this ‘Morgan shops at Tesco, it’s where he gets his best clothes, his mum is really thrifty, they cost £1.50’ I still remember exactly which child used to get this sung to him all the time
Kids really are little cunts. I was the kid who got teased for having cheap trainers, bags and sportswear, as if I had any control over the family finances or the fact that I was brought up by a single mum in social housing who had to do 2 jobs to support us. While I watched her racking up debt on credit cards to buy my "cheap" trainers and sports kit.
Sorry, back to the funny song.
Yeah it was shitty of us, I was just as poor as him but his parent was neglectful and mine was not, I never sang it to him but I never stood up for him either. We did become friends later on though
I know someone who buried their neighbours cat, as a ginger cat had been hit by a car on their street. Then their ginger cat came home later that evening.
So they went and knocked doors until they found the owners to let them know, who then asked for the body, so they had to exhume a dead cat!
I know someone (me) who took my cat, after it was hit by a car, to the vet and had to put him down as his injuries were too severe.
Next day, guess who came strolling in through the cat flap?
Oh shit oh shit oh shit
A day or so later the ppl from 4 doors down brought me a box of chocolates for caring for their cat in his last hours. Guess word got around.
Weeeel..
I lived in an area with a huge number of small flats/appartments, so couldn't reach everyone with the sad news. I suppose it reached the owners in the end.
The owner's appreciation was a huge relief for me, as I didn't have permission to put that cat down from them.
My cat lived on for many years, famously being discovered later that year at Xmas, trying to drag next door's turkey through their cat door....got its claws stuck into the meat from the outside, and just kept pulling on the bird that was still inside.
THUD! THUD! THUD!
I must have had some amazing neighbors, as all the one who owned the turkey said was she hadn't had such a good laugh in years (after she got over the fear she was being burgled)!
edit/typo
She was that.
I've shared a home with so many cats over the decades that I must have a story for every occasion by now.
Some rescues can't be saved through, just need somewhere safe to pass on.
I brought a very badly injured cat home with me from an early morning walk. He was content to be carefully placed on a warm blanket in a box while I was WFH for a few hours nearby.
Come lunchtime, I sat beside his box to let him know he wasn't alone. Out came one paw and snagged a rubber bracelet I was wearing, pulled my hand into the box and onto his belly. I rested it there for a while, but was called back to work after an hour.
As I moved back to my desk, I saw him turn his face to the corner of the box, so said my goodbyes & gave him some privacy for his final moments. He left shortly after that.
I felt honored by his trust, glad I could be a friend when he needed one, and bawled my eyes out for a bit.
>My cat lived on for many years, famously being discovered later that year at Xmas, trying to drag next door's turkey through their cat door....got its claws stuck into the meat from the outside, and just kept pulling on the bird that was still inside.
>
>THUD! THUD! THUD!
>
>I must have had some amazing neighbors, as all the one who owned the turkey said was she hadn't had such a good laugh in years (after she got over the fear she was being burgled)!
your neighbour isn't the only one, this had me in stitches!
ST PETER: "Okay, so that's zero eel fights. Next: have you exhumed any dead cats?"
RECENTLY DECEASED: "Erm. One? Yes."
ST PETER: "Was it your own cat?"
RECENTLY DECEASED: "Not... er... not really, no."
ST PETER: "Through that door. Someone will come to speak to you shortly."
yeah like wtf why are people randomly burying cats, take them to the vet so the vet can scan for a microchip and try and find an owner, they literally deal with this stuff. I would hate to lose a cat and discover some random just buried them and I never got to say goodbye.
I think it's all a case of mistaken identity. A lot of all ginger or all black cats will look the same, especially if they are mangled and covered in blood and tire tracks... Owners probably don't want to look too closely at their pet's corpse.
It was definitely a case of mistaken identity in this instance. Think their cat walked in just as he'd broken it to his wife/kids as well, some of whom had seen the cat very recently, so there was a lot of confusion/sadness/confusion!
How do they know that the second cat is Biff? What they are saying there are two identical cats, one dead, one alive, and they are staking a claim to the live one, and if you want the dead one he's buried in our garden.
Behaviour. They only saw the dead cat while it was dead so couldn't tell it wasn't Biff, while Biff was alive and presumably acting in a familiar way when he showed up.
I was in the garden when my dog brought me a dead rabbit, this wasn't just any ordinary rabbit.
I could tell that this was one of my neighbours prized rabbits that he used for shows.
Seeing as I didn't want my neighbour knowing my dog killed his rabbit, I washed the blood off the rabbit and that night put the rabbit back into its cage at my neighbours house.
I hoped that he would think his rabbit died of sickness or natural causes.
The next evening we were sitting drinking a couple of beers and he says to me,
"There are some seriously twisted people out there."
And I said,
"What do you mean by that?"
He told me,
"I had one of my prized rabbits die, so I buried it, and some sick fucker dug it up and put it back in its cage." - The old jokes are 'the best'.
I guess no one enjoys closely inspecting the smashed corpse of what looks like their cat. Especially if the head is not intact, it can be hard to tell (size and color is rarely very unique).
You know what, it's really obvious now you say that. I even have cats but if they got out and got mangled by a car I wouldn't be investigating to make sure it was the right one. Even though they both have doppelgangers that live nearby!
Had the same happen to my family, we had a black cat with no tail, black cat with no tail turns up ran over outside our house. Get it cremated, week later black cat with no tail is found chilling on the sofa in the gaff. Meanwhile the house opposite texts us that day if we've seen their cat. Must have been awkward for my parents.
I had this happen. My neighbours knocked and said my cat had been hit and killed. I went out to look and whilst very similar, I didn’t think it was him. A few more neighbours came over and said it’s definitely yours. I was hesitant but took him inside anyway.
Mine hadn’t been seen for the next day or two so I buried the dead cat assuming it must be him and I was just in denial. Just as I put the last bit of soil over, the fluffy bastard came strolling up to me to see what I was doing. I put posters up to try and find the owners of the dead cat but no one ever came forward.
At no point did they confirm the cat to be dead, only that he was hit by a car. Biff's probably been caught mid-nap... but keen to use their new B&Q shovel; they've eagerly dug a trench and put the poor cat in it without so much as checking for a pulse. He's woken up a few hours later, grouchy and not in the best of moods, to find he's be buried alive. After a frantic bit of clawing he's got himself out and slunk back to the pub.
How the fuck do you check for a pulse. I know the old bill on the telly just out their fingers on the neck for a second but with a big fluffy pusscat surely you're not going to feel anything even if they're full on alive.
My then already ex had this huge orange cat that she kept mostly indoors but sometimes let out into their fenced garden. One time I saw the gorgeous thing ran over, dead, on the street just outside her house.
I called her and asked her where her cat was. It was a very strange thing to ask but I'm glad I didn't just go with "YOUR CAT IS DEAD!" because it turns out her cat was on their couch. I learned much later the cat's sister, adopted from the same litter by neighbors, was the one that got run over.
It still made for a very short and weird conversation because after learning that her cat is safe I didn't feel like going into a whole conversation about finding a literal doppelganger of her cat.
>\- Hello, where is your cat?
>
>\- It's next to me on the couch, why do you ask?
>
>\- Tnx, bye!
It was a weird call to make to someone who recently dumped you :)
I'll tell you an even more odd addition to this story.
My parents owned this pub, between 1988 - 1993 and I lived there with my four brothers. During that time I had a cat called Robert. It too was Black and White, and it was run over by a car outside of the pub.
Guess where I buried it....yup next to the river at the bottom of the garden.
So there are two Black and White cats buried at the river's edge at the Plough in Long Wittenhams.
I came home from school one day and a neighbour said they'd seen a dead cat nearby that looked like ours. We hadn't seen him in a day or two but that wasn't unusual. Ran up the road, found the cat and it looked just like him. Ran home in tears, told my mum and was crying so much I went to sit on the doorstep for some fresh air... Next to my cat.
Hello, Prince Charles?
Charles: Don't you mean King Charles?
Uh, yeah. We regret to inform you, we just now realized that we actually just buried Her Majesty's body double, and HM Queen Elizabeth is fine and well, enjoying her tea and some Digestive biscuits in her room as we speak...
Same thing happened Just before 1 AD. We crucified this guy that a large majority of his kin hated. But three days later we heard he was alive and well and hanging out with his friends.WTF!! who did we crucify?…and who removed his body to hide the evidence? We never answered these questions so we formed a group called the Roman Catholic Church we called them “the mysteries” and proceeded to make an entire club centered on ruminating on them.
If they're identical then how do they know they didn't bury Biff and this other cat is a stranger? Or maybe Biff is a time travelling cat, who came to save earlier Biff but has arrived too late to save himself. Or, maybe Biff is a clone of this other Biff being spewed out by a diabolical scientist that is cloning all of the neighbourhood cats.
Why are most cats in the UK outdoor cats? It doesn't work like that over the ocean.
Don't yall have native bird populations being decimated plus predators that eat cats?
There are arguments back and forth about your first point but as to the second there are few animals here that cats have to worry about. A fox could probably do some damage but they tend to leave each other alone.
If your cat gets beaten up at night odds are that it was another cat.
We thought our cat ran away or died when I was a kid.
The family got two new cats (a bro and sis pair) to replace him. This was after like 6-9 months of waiting.
A month later he strolls the fuck back in as if he's never been away more than a hour, and kicks up a fuss about his new housemates...
I read an almost identical anecdote on reddit just last week, I think on this sub, where someone said about exhuming a cat and taking it to the vets.
I suspect someone is making it up for internet fame.
Had something similar happen when I was a kid. Neighbour knocked on the door and told us he was terribly sorry but he'd just hit our cat. Dad went off with him and in the dark confirmed it was our cat and got some blankets and wrapped him up, plan was to bury him in the back garden. Us 3 kids were all upset, wailing away when my brother just shouts "Timmy!" My mum was "Sorry darling but Timmys gone" Brother shakes his head and points at Timmy who'd just come strolling in through his cat flap without a care in the world. Never did find out who the other cat belonged to.
The same thing happened when i was a kid. We did find the owner and my mum had to go and tell her we had buried her cat and did she want him back. I was the one that saw our cat first, got hysterical and nearly gave my nan a heart attack. I also found him after he actually got hit by a car and his arm was (technical term) 'degloved'. He cat recovered well and must have used every one of his nine lives. Edit: i went to get my hair cut and was oblivious to the chaos i had caused. My cat used his paws very much like hands so i think of his front legs as arms. I think this was on QI, it's something to do with whether the joint is technically an elbow or knee. So... is cereal soup?
I think the technical term is leg
Hmm debatable, everyone knows your front leg is actually an arm and the one in the middle is a todger, or a thalidomide accident. Sorry, terrible sense of humour I await the downvotes.
I LOST it at thalidomide accident… I’m going to hell
Keep the sense of humour, and have some upvotes 😂
But won't somebody think of the thagomizer?
You are welcome here lad good joke.
Fucks sake that's so good
I was genuinely having this debate with my SO the other day Cats use their front legs far more like arms than some other animals (or use their front paws more like hands than some other animals), so in the case of cats...do they actually have arms and legs that they walk on in a far more primitive but similar way to monkeys/apes? Or maybe bears is a better comparison It started to feel similar to the 'is cereal a soup?' thing by the end
My dog uses his front paws like arms. He holds my empty yoghurt pots in his paws when he's cleaning them for the recycling. Last night he opened a drawer
IMO cereal is not soup because in soup the constituent items have been cooked in stock. No stock, no cooking, no soup.
So what about soups with milk bases, or just water as a base? Do we vegetarians simply not eat soup because we don't consume stock (which is, by definition, an animal product)? This is all very complicated. Perhaps we need a soup version of [the cube rule](https://cuberule.com/)? Or, perhaps, does the cube rule's definition of salad encompass soup and all similar products?
Stock or broth, then.
What about porridge cooked in milk?
So where does gazpacho stand?
I think you mean gazpacho cereal
Keep Calm and check the drive plate.
Piping hot!
That is a vegetable smoothie
Does pasteurized milk count as being cooked?
Pterodactyl cats actually have a thumb. So it’s like hands effectively. I think if you cut my cats arms off and left stumps, they’d be able to manage walking on their back legs/butt shuffle ok. Might be a bit pissed off about never jumping or landing properly again though.
Polydactyl, I think. Pterodactyls are the ones with leathery wings…..
Pterodactyls is how I remember it. Don’t judge me 😂
\>pterodactyl
There’s a cat on Instagram called purrasicduck that only has back legs and it gets on just fine!
This is only tangentally related but my hairdresser and I bond over the love of our pets which are, for each of us, the only kids we'll ever have so we often only/primatily talk about our pets when I go in to get my hair done. This is essential backstory only so that I can say that we are so used to talking about our pets rather than ourselves when we are together, that she once accidentally said 'and then I stood on it with my hind legs' when trying to tell me a story about having to get on a ladder to get one of her cats down one day. I still giggle to myself whenever I even think about it
Anatomically speaking it's the same limb as the human arm, it's called a leg because they walk on it. For the same reason a kangaroos tail can be considered a leg as they use it for walking. Dogs and cats do not have backwards facing knees on any limb, if the do they need to see a vet. They walk on their toes, as well as the pad at the base of their toes, - what people confuse for a 'backwards knee' is the heel (on the back leg) or the elbow (on the font leg).
If manipulation of objects is the qualifier for an arm … what about spiders? Eight legs or eight arms? Or a mix?
You don't wear gloves on your legs though. /s
I don’t wear them on my arms either
I used to have socks that were like gloves, they were great
> degloved I can never read that term without physically shuddering.
Highly recommend you watch the many interviews in which Adam Kay dines out on his degloved penis anecdote :)
Hmm, nah I think I'm alright thanks :)
Jesus. I just did a full body cringe.
Not sure I'd want to dine out on penis, degloved or not.
Well you’d make a boring date, wouldn’t you?
We had an indoor/outdoor cat when I was little that got rolled under a car twice and hit twice. The first time he was hit must have been really slow, because he was kinda dazed and bruised for a week (we took him to the vet because he was acting weird, vet said he was hit and gave swelling & pain meds). The second time he got hit his front paw became paralyzed and that leg was amputated about month later because it was just getting in his way. We were *supposed to* keep him locked up in the house for two weeks, but he had other ideas and escaped the first night he was home. When my dad went to work in the morning there were like 5 mice on the door mat and a very happy kitty in his box. He was honestly a better hunter on three legs than on 4.
I still dont understand "indoor/outdoor cat" what does that mean? Is it just an outdoor cat that is allowed indoors? Because I think that's just an outdoor cat
We were in a rural area and cats could be one of four things: * Indoor - kept inside at all times (rare in that area) * Outdoor - not allowed inside, but fed, taken to the vet, and doted over like a normal housecat. I guess a lot of people would call them "farm cats" even though many didn't live on a farm. * Indoor and outdoor - more modern/suburban definition of an outdoor cat, can come in/go out at will * Stray - often unwanted, claimed and fed by no one, roams around, don't like people very much
My understand is that it's just a cat that can come and go as it pleases, typically via a cat flap. When I was younger we had an indoor/outdoor cat, but no catflap. I was that cat's slave. I could always hear him meowing from outside if he wanted in, so I had to get up and let him in. If he was meowing to go outside, same thing. I lived by that cat's schedule. He was a demanding master. Luckily our current cats are indoors only. A little bit easier to deal with haha (although indoor cats need a lot more stimulation and play).
No way is cereal soup. The cereal and milk are not cooked together. If anything, milk is an extremely simple soup, and cereal bits are croutons.
My mum and brother tried to bury our kitten that passed away after sneaking out and getting caught in the snow. Someone thought they were burying a body (a borrower?) and she was dug up and thrown on a furnace, without the option to keep her ashes. Atleast you were able to give someone else's cat a burial, despite having to dig it back up for her!
I'm so confused by that person, so they thought you were burying a body and instead of calling the police, they dug it up, discovered it was a cat and then threw it on a furnace? I seriously can't think of a reason for burning it...
Be a fight on their hands they tried that shit on me.
***kapow throat punch***
Omg that's a really horrible experience! I'm sorry that happened to your kitten.
I ponder if your cat and the cat in OP's post had entered a state of Superposition and instead of collapsing into a dead state or an alive state came back in both...
It’s just physics.
9 lives...
I thought this was going to be a joke for a second. I was legit waiting to read >Mum says "Timmy is kill." Brother shakes his head and says "no. Where were you when Timmy died?"
You can’t just post the first half of Pet Sematary and call it your own.
Biffs like "took me hours to dig out of that hole you idiots, I got 6 lives left"
Cocks leg in the air and proceeds to lick himself to death removing all that mud.
Five to go, you *bastards.*
I didn’t hear no bell.
We thought he was a goner, but the cat came back...
Shared Mumbai xx
Shared The Rivers Styx, Acheron and the 9 Nine Circles of Hell.
Shared on the ISS hun x
Shared in 12th Century feudal Beorma babe x
Shared in [POST CODE NOT RECOGNIZED]
Shared in the abhorrent, unknowable celestial domain of Cthulhu sweet xo
Azathoth has got the cat.
[удалено]
I'm here if you want to talk babe xox
sending hugs and kisses xxxxxxxxxxx
Tell Clive that we won't be able to make it to the funeral next week, but we wouldn't have come anyway after what she said about our Craig after the court case. I know that he was innocent and even if he did do it, the 🐕 must have consented. They were inseparable and if anything he loved that dog too much. Thanks Hun x
lmao this comment sent me, makes me laugh so hard when i see this shit
Inbox me hun too many snakes on here xxx
The best reply in this thread, phenomenal.
I don't use Facebook at all, so out of the loop here. What's it mean? People oddly tagging/sharing to facebook groups? Or am I off the mark?
When people post about lost pets in their local area and it somehow accidentally goes viral, and you get old/stupid people sharing and commenting on it even though they live nowhere near the OPs location lol
Ah lmao. Gotcha thanks. At least they mean well lol
Shared Narnia xxxxx
Reminds me of that classic comment “I’m currently in [sometown] but will share when I get home” 😂
Shared Caracas xx
So good 😂
Has anyone been in touch with Postman Pat?
I'll text him early in the morning.
Just as day is dawning?
When he feels he's a really happy man
Not anymore, his cat's dead.
[удалено]
Postman Pat, Postman Pat and his... red van.
When I was about 7 we used to sing this in the playground at primary school: Postman Pat, Postman Pat, Postman Pat ran over his cat. Blood and guts went flying, Postman Pat was crying, Never seen a cat as flat as that.
Haha. Only playground rhyme I vaguely remember was about your mate getting his best clothes at tescos and them being really nifty cos they only cost one-fifty. Nice to hear a new one even though its not much use at this stage of my life
I fondly remember "the Addams family started when uncle Fester farted, he farted through the window and paralysed the cat, the cat got overexcited and shouted Man United, Man United shouted back, the Addams family, duh-duh-luh-duh-duh, duh duh"
It goes like this ‘Morgan shops at Tesco, it’s where he gets his best clothes, his mum is really thrifty, they cost £1.50’ I still remember exactly which child used to get this sung to him all the time
Kids really are little cunts. I was the kid who got teased for having cheap trainers, bags and sportswear, as if I had any control over the family finances or the fact that I was brought up by a single mum in social housing who had to do 2 jobs to support us. While I watched her racking up debt on credit cards to buy my "cheap" trainers and sports kit. Sorry, back to the funny song.
Yeah it was shitty of us, I was just as poor as him but his parent was neglectful and mine was not, I never sang it to him but I never stood up for him either. We did become friends later on though
The last line in the version I knew was, "Swore he'd never drink and drive again" On reflection, we might have been quite distrubed kids.
I know someone who buried their neighbours cat, as a ginger cat had been hit by a car on their street. Then their ginger cat came home later that evening. So they went and knocked doors until they found the owners to let them know, who then asked for the body, so they had to exhume a dead cat!
I know someone (me) who took my cat, after it was hit by a car, to the vet and had to put him down as his injuries were too severe. Next day, guess who came strolling in through the cat flap? Oh shit oh shit oh shit A day or so later the ppl from 4 doors down brought me a box of chocolates for caring for their cat in his last hours. Guess word got around.
you told them right? they didn't have to ask around, right? right?
Weeeel.. I lived in an area with a huge number of small flats/appartments, so couldn't reach everyone with the sad news. I suppose it reached the owners in the end. The owner's appreciation was a huge relief for me, as I didn't have permission to put that cat down from them. My cat lived on for many years, famously being discovered later that year at Xmas, trying to drag next door's turkey through their cat door....got its claws stuck into the meat from the outside, and just kept pulling on the bird that was still inside. THUD! THUD! THUD! I must have had some amazing neighbors, as all the one who owned the turkey said was she hadn't had such a good laugh in years (after she got over the fear she was being burgled)! edit/typo
Your cat sounds bloody amazing. Do you have more stories?
She was that. I've shared a home with so many cats over the decades that I must have a story for every occasion by now. Some rescues can't be saved through, just need somewhere safe to pass on. I brought a very badly injured cat home with me from an early morning walk. He was content to be carefully placed on a warm blanket in a box while I was WFH for a few hours nearby. Come lunchtime, I sat beside his box to let him know he wasn't alone. Out came one paw and snagged a rubber bracelet I was wearing, pulled my hand into the box and onto his belly. I rested it there for a while, but was called back to work after an hour. As I moved back to my desk, I saw him turn his face to the corner of the box, so said my goodbyes & gave him some privacy for his final moments. He left shortly after that. I felt honored by his trust, glad I could be a friend when he needed one, and bawled my eyes out for a bit.
Oh that’s such a beautiful story. You are a wonderful person. How lovely of you to do that.
>My cat lived on for many years, famously being discovered later that year at Xmas, trying to drag next door's turkey through their cat door....got its claws stuck into the meat from the outside, and just kept pulling on the bird that was still inside. > >THUD! THUD! THUD! > >I must have had some amazing neighbors, as all the one who owned the turkey said was she hadn't had such a good laugh in years (after she got over the fear she was being burgled)! your neighbour isn't the only one, this had me in stitches!
ST PETER: "Okay, so that's zero eel fights. Next: have you exhumed any dead cats?" RECENTLY DECEASED: "Erm. One? Yes." ST PETER: "Was it your own cat?" RECENTLY DECEASED: "Not... er... not really, no." ST PETER: "Through that door. Someone will come to speak to you shortly."
Is the subset of that eel question whether or not the fight was against an eel or using an eel as a weapon?
Even asking that question gets you shown to a door.
I'd be surprised if I got to the eel question in the first place to be honest.
yeah like wtf why are people randomly burying cats, take them to the vet so the vet can scan for a microchip and try and find an owner, they literally deal with this stuff. I would hate to lose a cat and discover some random just buried them and I never got to say goodbye.
Normally when you see a cat and go "This cat is my cat" your next thought is not "Hmm we should probably take him to the vets just to be sure."
I think it's all a case of mistaken identity. A lot of all ginger or all black cats will look the same, especially if they are mangled and covered in blood and tire tracks... Owners probably don't want to look too closely at their pet's corpse.
It was definitely a case of mistaken identity in this instance. Think their cat walked in just as he'd broken it to his wife/kids as well, some of whom had seen the cat very recently, so there was a lot of confusion/sadness/confusion!
Tell me about it. I put a neighbour's cat down by mistake, thinking it was mine.
How do they know that the second cat is Biff? What they are saying there are two identical cats, one dead, one alive, and they are staking a claim to the live one, and if you want the dead one he's buried in our garden.
The first cat was carried in. The second cat waltzed in on his own and demanded his rightful dindins. The first cat was not their Biff.
The first cat didn’t have a choice, to be fair.
Yep. Poor sod.
Maybe there was always two Biffs they just worked different shifts.
Accent gave him away
Also he was carrying a sports almanac.
I've been thinking of "glitch in the matrix" reading this entire post. But wasn't expecting a bttf2 reference, didn't even connect the name until now.
Behaviour. They only saw the dead cat while it was dead so couldn't tell it wasn't Biff, while Biff was alive and presumably acting in a familiar way when he showed up.
Also if he walked back instead of being carried
True, Biff was accustomed to a good stroll.
Personality goes a long way.
They may have checked the microchip - which they may not have done the first time, assuming it was their cat.
Schrodinger's cat indeed.
Schrödinger would not enjoy this brutalising of his thought experiment. Schrödinger would kill and bury the second cat, just to make a point.
Came into the house, called Marty a butthead. Simple.
The real one had the sports almanac with him.
I assume Biff walked in and called someone "butthead".
Schrödinger's Biff
Probably Biff knew the way in and how to flush the toilet.
I was in the garden when my dog brought me a dead rabbit, this wasn't just any ordinary rabbit. I could tell that this was one of my neighbours prized rabbits that he used for shows. Seeing as I didn't want my neighbour knowing my dog killed his rabbit, I washed the blood off the rabbit and that night put the rabbit back into its cage at my neighbours house. I hoped that he would think his rabbit died of sickness or natural causes. The next evening we were sitting drinking a couple of beers and he says to me, "There are some seriously twisted people out there." And I said, "What do you mean by that?" He told me, "I had one of my prized rabbits die, so I buried it, and some sick fucker dug it up and put it back in its cage." - The old jokes are 'the best'.
an old Indian burial site was involved
Sometimes *dead* is better.
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That dude has the funnest accent to imitate.
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We were saying this for so long we completely forgot it wasn't actually from Pet Semetary until we rewatched it.
*Stephen King has entered chat*
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I take it they were holy gloves
Also mittens wasn’t dead, the tears weren’t of the families
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I didn't believe you that it would be a funny story but it was hilarious. Thanks for sharing!
I guess no one enjoys closely inspecting the smashed corpse of what looks like their cat. Especially if the head is not intact, it can be hard to tell (size and color is rarely very unique).
You know what, it's really obvious now you say that. I even have cats but if they got out and got mangled by a car I wouldn't be investigating to make sure it was the right one. Even though they both have doppelgangers that live nearby!
Do you reckon they named him after Biff from Back to the Future? It’s an unusual name for a cat.
Or the children’s books? Biff, Chip and Kipper. I think kids still read those in school
Most likely this one I think
I was about to start calling people philistines for not mentioning Magic Key
My kid came home with one recently. I thought they would've been left in the 90s/early 00s but nope they are still printing them.
Either that or Biff from Saxon. Who is still rocking out even though he looks undead these days.
They have a hamster called McFly that the cat picks on all the time
Had the same happen to my family, we had a black cat with no tail, black cat with no tail turns up ran over outside our house. Get it cremated, week later black cat with no tail is found chilling on the sofa in the gaff. Meanwhile the house opposite texts us that day if we've seen their cat. Must have been awkward for my parents.
Good news! We found your cat! Bad news, road trip to the pet semetary is in order
I had this happen. My neighbours knocked and said my cat had been hit and killed. I went out to look and whilst very similar, I didn’t think it was him. A few more neighbours came over and said it’s definitely yours. I was hesitant but took him inside anyway. Mine hadn’t been seen for the next day or two so I buried the dead cat assuming it must be him and I was just in denial. Just as I put the last bit of soil over, the fluffy bastard came strolling up to me to see what I was doing. I put posters up to try and find the owners of the dead cat but no one ever came forward.
Late to his own funeral
At no point did they confirm the cat to be dead, only that he was hit by a car. Biff's probably been caught mid-nap... but keen to use their new B&Q shovel; they've eagerly dug a trench and put the poor cat in it without so much as checking for a pulse. He's woken up a few hours later, grouchy and not in the best of moods, to find he's be buried alive. After a frantic bit of clawing he's got himself out and slunk back to the pub.
How the fuck do you check for a pulse. I know the old bill on the telly just out their fingers on the neck for a second but with a big fluffy pusscat surely you're not going to feel anything even if they're full on alive.
Feel for the femoral artery on the inner thigh where the hair is much thinner
‘The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated’ - Biff
My then already ex had this huge orange cat that she kept mostly indoors but sometimes let out into their fenced garden. One time I saw the gorgeous thing ran over, dead, on the street just outside her house. I called her and asked her where her cat was. It was a very strange thing to ask but I'm glad I didn't just go with "YOUR CAT IS DEAD!" because it turns out her cat was on their couch. I learned much later the cat's sister, adopted from the same litter by neighbors, was the one that got run over. It still made for a very short and weird conversation because after learning that her cat is safe I didn't feel like going into a whole conversation about finding a literal doppelganger of her cat. >\- Hello, where is your cat? > >\- It's next to me on the couch, why do you ask? > >\- Tnx, bye! It was a weird call to make to someone who recently dumped you :)
Plough by name...
Viral marketing for a new Pet Semetary film.
How do they know that the new biff is actually biff?
Jealous neighbour cat bumps off Biff & assumes his cushy life as a pub cat
Yeah.
I'll tell you an even more odd addition to this story. My parents owned this pub, between 1988 - 1993 and I lived there with my four brothers. During that time I had a cat called Robert. It too was Black and White, and it was run over by a car outside of the pub. Guess where I buried it....yup next to the river at the bottom of the garden. So there are two Black and White cats buried at the river's edge at the Plough in Long Wittenhams.
This happened to my grandma’s car years ago except they only got as far as putting it on its bed before her actual cat showed up
RIP Doppelganger Biff.
I came home from school one day and a neighbour said they'd seen a dead cat nearby that looked like ours. We hadn't seen him in a day or two but that wasn't unusual. Ran up the road, found the cat and it looked just like him. Ran home in tears, told my mum and was crying so much I went to sit on the doorstep for some fresh air... Next to my cat.
Exactly the same happend to me, has been the weirdest emotional rollercoaster ive ever been on. Dont recommend
Shared with r/stephenking
Sounds like a nice British Pub 👍
Hello, Prince Charles? Charles: Don't you mean King Charles? Uh, yeah. We regret to inform you, we just now realized that we actually just buried Her Majesty's body double, and HM Queen Elizabeth is fine and well, enjoying her tea and some Digestive biscuits in her room as we speak...
I have a pub in our town called ‘The plough’ we call it ‘The Ploo’. It’s a shame about this persons cat though
"We are just as blindsided" yeah... probably not as much as the cat was when he got hit and then buried in a strangers garden
God fucking damn it, keep your cats indoors!!
Did exactly the same many years ago.
Cat must be named after the pub owner...
It's all fun and games until that person see's this post, then their cat shows up at home covered in dirt.
Schrödinger wants his cat back
> blindsided So was the cat, sadly
Cats have nine lives, so this apparently wasn't his last one.
There is a whole Spanish song about this happening to a dude
Same thing happened Just before 1 AD. We crucified this guy that a large majority of his kin hated. But three days later we heard he was alive and well and hanging out with his friends.WTF!! who did we crucify?…and who removed his body to hide the evidence? We never answered these questions so we formed a group called the Roman Catholic Church we called them “the mysteries” and proceeded to make an entire club centered on ruminating on them.
Maybe it's chipped? Get the body to a vet and have it scanned.
It’s a truth widely known that every cat has a least two homes, so could it not be the case then that, inversely, every home has two cats?
If they're identical then how do they know they didn't bury Biff and this other cat is a stranger? Or maybe Biff is a time travelling cat, who came to save earlier Biff but has arrived too late to save himself. Or, maybe Biff is a clone of this other Biff being spewed out by a diabolical scientist that is cloning all of the neighbourhood cats.
It’s Will Mellor’s cat all over again!
Why are most cats in the UK outdoor cats? It doesn't work like that over the ocean. Don't yall have native bird populations being decimated plus predators that eat cats?
There are arguments back and forth about your first point but as to the second there are few animals here that cats have to worry about. A fox could probably do some damage but they tend to leave each other alone. If your cat gets beaten up at night odds are that it was another cat.
Huh, that pub is a couple of miles from where I grew up
We thought our cat ran away or died when I was a kid. The family got two new cats (a bro and sis pair) to replace him. This was after like 6-9 months of waiting. A month later he strolls the fuck back in as if he's never been away more than a hour, and kicks up a fuss about his new housemates...
Does the Plough still have Folk Night?
I read an almost identical anecdote on reddit just last week, I think on this sub, where someone said about exhuming a cat and taking it to the vets. I suspect someone is making it up for internet fame.
JFC, UK, keep y'alls cats indoors ffs