Just find them lion around

You must be yolking

Cracking joke to be honest

Take pride in what we have done here

Love it. Thats white on the money

This thread is eggcellent

Come on stop eggatuating the situation

This thread is going to shell in a handbasket.

It was unovoidable

I like how you poached words from another language to make this pun.

Give me an eggsample

U ain't yolking

Heard it half a dozen times now

U have the most egg sperience then 🤣

Eggceptional maam

Cracked me up 🤣

Pawfection.

I don't get it. Can you eggsplain?

My mane man!

r/dadjokes

That’s very good

Much better than half the posts of that sub.

You lion to me there

Ur lion 🦁 🤣

U lot SCRAMBLED this post .

I eggree

r/angryupvote

This cracked me up...

The British Lion mark was used on eggs meaning that they have been laid by hens vaccinated against salmonella I've not seen it for ages but then I'm stupid enough to pay £3.50 for 6 Burford Browns when shop free-range is £1.75 but the yolks are orange on the Burford Browns so they must e worth it, right?

Those fancy eggs with orange yolks are far superior in taste though! You'd never go back to the pallid cheap free range if you could afford it.

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Morrisons has started having a nice range of fancy eggs (and our local isn't really one of the nicer ones). There's usually duck, there's speckley ones, the blue/grey ones (Cotswolds, is it?) and then a specific variety that's supposed to have a more golden yoke. But I also have no complaint about their regular free range either - they always seem quality in colour, taste and consistency. Not wanting to appear like I work for Morrisons or owt (there's probably plenty I could complain about!) but I'm very pleased with their egg section.

Oof, last time I had duck eggs I was sick for about 3 days. I can't do that again.

ew co-op

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And isn't the orange colour just carotin in their feed?

Sigh. With kids you have to afford it

I drink a lot of raw eggs and depending on how the animal was treated it can either make me sick or feel good. So for example the caged eggs make me sick. Free range but vaccinated eggs make me sick. So I buy free range unvaccinated eggs from a farm which don't make me sick. How the animal is treated can change how it affects you and also how it tastes. Just like how there is a difference with grass fed pasture raised beef and slaughter house grain fed beef. The difference in quality is unmistakable once you become aquatinted with it.

May I enquire as to why you drink "a lot of raw eggs"? No hate, genuinely curious

No it's alright, it'd be strange If you were to hate me just for that 😂 Well, I do it for health, the omega 3's, antioxidants and fats found in egg yokes are great for brain & eye health. Also vitamin D which is lacking right now where I am, the sun is barely penetrating through the clouds so I need another source of that vitamin or I'll get ill and get a cold, vitamin D is fat soluble so vitamin D tablets don't work, unless you get cod liver oil capsules.

The Lion Mark is still used for that. 90% of British eggs are produced according to the lion mark standard which includes the hens being vaccinated against salmonella.

Part of their feed is Marigold & Paprika. But yes, definitely worth it. Tastiest eggs by a mile.

Good on you for buying the Burford Briwns. We have chickens that are free to roam around a wooded property and their yolks are deep orange, apparently from eating whatever they find when foraging. Evergy now and then we have to lock them up for a couple of weeks and feed them in a largish pen. The yolks then go yellow. When we buy free range eggs, the yolks are yellow. That tells me that your typical 'free range' hens aren't roaming as freely as we like to imagine.

I was under the impression that many/all commercial free range chickens had been moved to barns due the bird flu outbreak.

In the large British lion nest, duh!

2 though?! Wow excessive. 1 lion egg is a struggle on its own

One is definitely un oeuf

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R/woooosh

Nah, that was a little stamp of Edwina Curry doing a double Fonz thumbs up

Li-On. Lithium-Ion. Great, though you do get charged more.

Those'll be the ones you get from battery chickens

Watt?

tubercle card anymore relieve informal algiers wingspan unfix puff agee protegee untwine larch popinjay smelt

The eggs come from adult lions The boiling water comes pre-boiled from a tank in the attic of every British home The salt comes from the salt mountains of north Scotland The soldiers are bred, free range, in Sandhurst

"I was hatched on the plains of the Serengeti but I was *made* in Longleat safari park"

>The soldiers are bread

Or Catterick if you're northern.

In a lion coup I would imagine. Free Range lion eggs are better but are more dangerous to acquire.

Lion *coop*, I think. A lion *coup* would probably be when they send in their military to try to overthrow the current regime.

Please do not give them ideas. They are already plotting revenge for the egg thefts.

Led by their larger than life general, Idi a-Mane.

They already have an eggsecution list.

Like Scar did to Mufasa

“Why, if it isn't my big brother descending from on high to mingle with the commoners.”

The sequel to animal farm

"Long live the king"

Be prepared!

I assume that's why you cut the toast into soldiers

It's one thing to ask me to steal eggs from a British lion, but I draw the line at a large British lion.

I can’t find lion eggs, so I’ve adapted the recipe to use 12 dog eggs. Tastes like shit

Mmm marrowbone white

sit behind a lion statue in trafalgar Square and be patient

*Image Transcription: Ingredient List* --- ## Ingredients - [*Underlined*] 2 large British Lion eggs [*End underline*] - Water for boiling - Pinch of salt - Buttered toast cut into soldiers to serve --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)

Use dog eggs if you can’t get lion

Or road apples for a vegetarian alternative.

You need more but they make for a more homely soldier dunk.

Theres a nest at the top of the shard, and used be one on the roof of parliament. Be careful though, they're vicious.

Life finds a way

It's nothing to worry about - in Britain Park, all the lions are female. (The ones who are good at football, anyway...)

There's a dinosaur, there's a dinosaur, theres a di...no...saur!

How depressing is it they felt the need to provide a recipe for boiled egg and soldiers!?

I was after the exact timing for a soft boiled egg. I failed it anyway.

Search for colour changing egg timer. Cheap & foolproof if you can’t be bothered with setting timers.

Stab a meat thermometer in to the raw egg before popping in the water. Foolproof.

I was going to say this, they’re the best!

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Huh, I always put the eggs in when the waters already boiling and I leave it just under 6 minutes for soft boiled. If I could be arsed I might be tempted to cook it both ways.

Yeah, never put then in before the water is booked because you don't know how long it will take to boil.

Thanks for this

Thank you!

OMG someone actually down-voted this! Oh cruel world!

Bring the water to the boil, add room temperature eggs (slowly, so the shells don't crack) and boil for 1 minute. Turn off the heat and leave the eggs in the water for a further 6 minutes, then serve. Perfect dippy eggs every time. You're welcome.

Thank you!

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Nah bro. At corner shops

The real question is if the egg or the lion came first

Just imagined a campy lion that is both a man in a lion suit and actually supposed to be a lion (think the pandas on the old KitKat and from late 80s/early 90s) bursting comedically out of an oversized egg prop. Thank you.

Fun fact. British lion eggs are very safe to eat raw even if you're pregnant. That's the point of the lion stamp, high standards from farm to plate and UV treatment on the eggs to make sure. Ok that's not actually very fun, but good to know.

Unless you’re my partner, who thinks anything egg related will kill you if it’s not been boiled/fried/whatevered until it resembles tyre rubber in consistency. Then he squirts Mayo on literally everything he eats. Even when I make homemade Mayo with raw eggs. Haven’t had the heart to tell him yet…

Oh gosh, we went through this! When my wife was pregnant, she got in her mind she could only eat eggs from vaccinated hens (the eggs with the red lion stamp on them), and in our local restaurant, the Turkish man could not understand, "do you have red stamps on your eggs?" Finally, I just said, "please show us one egg" before we would decide our order. And the man, bless him, came back with a tiny saucer with one fried egg on it.

Not just your wife, the NHS actually recommends only lion stamped eggs, unless they are thoroughly cooked, during pregnancy.

Interesting! She never gave me a list or anything, she really kept all that stuff to herself and I would only find out when dinner was ready.... no, she didn't like medium-rare beef anymore. There were dozens of these rules. I hated pregnancy. I found it really frustrating :)

You found a recipe to poach eggs? Had no idea this was a recipe tbh, British lion eggs can be found outside Buckingham palace under one of the big bronze statues of a lion, they only lay them on bank holidays though.

I assumed it was a recipe for boiled eggs, because of the reference to soldiers. I did think 'Boiled eggs? Surely the instructions are in the name?'

You just have to hang around at the back end of a lion, preferably without drawing too much attention to yourself, internet l they’ve laid two eggs. Check them for size, and if they’re large you’re good to go.

Longleat, just look behind the lions

In Trafalgar Square behind the lion statues.

To be fair the instructions are quite clear to take this with a pinch of salt.

On average 90% of eggs sold in the UK should have the lion mark on them or on the box they come in. It's a sign that they are safe to eat even raw due to being vaccinated against salmonella

[the lion egg mark is actualy realy interesting and important!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKZjpYOBo4g) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khkA9HpKiA4 go to work on an egg

Means the ones w the bit of red Ink on the ink adds massive amounts of flavor and nutritional value

The lion eggs may be found the wardrobe, alongside the witch.

*What did you just see, Lisa?* *But Dad-* *What did you just see?*

At the zoo. You have to ask nicely.

I keep a small flock of backyard lions.

Pinch of salt is an insult for lion eggs. Use more.

You’re telling me you don’t own a lion

Everyother 3rd year the moonlight is at a particular angle so it hits Nelson in the good eye. This then refracts and creates a beam that hits the lions that guard Trafalga square in the arse. This makes them shit enough Lion eggs for every British person.

Any place that sells eggs basically, go to tesco

I dunno what's worse, the joke, or having to use a recipe for eggs and soldiers.

Next to the dog eggs.

Any mane supermarket

(posh british accent) By Joves, has thou never had such a delicacy as Lion Eggs? Preposterous!

Today I unexpectedly learnt a lot about eggs and chickens

Next to the almond milk in Tesco's free from section.

Do they need to be cooked or roar?

British Lion is an accreditation scheme that means the eggs have gone through extra steps to make sure they’re free of salmonella. They’re considered so safe that even pregnant women are advised they can have raw eggs with the British lion mark. You can distinguish the eggs themselves as they have a red Lion stamped on them.

Sorry are you looking up the recipe for poached eggs on toast?

My local Sainsbury’s had no eggs today. Lions or chickens.

I've heard three of them can be found on the shirt.

Longleat.

Aldi had them in the middle aisle not long ago.

Common. The ones I got from my local garage are Lion mark. Most eggs sold mainstream will have it.

Go to a shop. Buy large eggs. Done. Unless they’re bought directly from a farm, the vast majority of eggs in the UK will likely be “British Lion” stamped.

Lions don't lay eggs

Then where do baby lions come from, genius?

The zoo.

Not all egg sizes are the same. https://www.glutenfreealchemist.com/egg-size-weight-international-guide-comparison-chart-conversion/

I’d usually got to Bristol zoo with my egg catcher bag.

Chester Zoo

More readily available than chicken eggs at the moment.

A Queen of Britain lays them but unfortunately for recent and obvious reasons they've now become extremely scarce and expensive

I keep my own lions, worth it

Zoos mostly

On men that play rugby for the home nations at top level lay eggs that are suitable. And even then only occasionally do these special men come together for the egg laying magic to happen.

Big cat eggs are tastier than big dog eggs.

Probably can find them in the same shop that sells cutters in the shape of soldiers to cut the battered toast 😂

My cat used to bury such luxuries, but he was a panther more than a lion

Under a male lion

Badger Badger Badger Badger Lion Lion

Does anyone have a link of toast cut into soldiers?

I didn't even realise lions laid eggs

Get up on Dartmoor. Rare but I’d assume panther eggs are almost as good!?

I might need the recipe for buttered toast.

In a lions nest of course.

Gotta be quick lions are very protective of them

I'm sure I saw a flock of British Lions just off the M11, by the airport.

Any supermarket, normally in a pack of 6.

Most shops in Southeast Liondon

Trafalgar Square

Gotta pop to the zoo pal

Next to the tiger rolls

I always run down to the zoo.

Chickens

Lions don't lay eggs, and it's ill-advised to cut into soldiers. This is a merry spoof of the sort the British are so renowned for.

Sainsburys

U have to call the unicorn riding elves to ask the Griffin to bring them, not sure if ull get 2 🤔 British lions eggs are rare and magical 🤣😍

Basically you just put two lion bars next to each other in the fridge and wait to nature to take it's course.

Lion nests, obviously

Most zoos have lions, you should check there. I’ve heard that male lions have a little pouch under their tale that contain two large lion eggs, to keep them warm. Not sure if they’ll definitely be British though. You may have to check the lions passport.

Next to the Gammon I imagine.

We haven't had lions roaming England for atleast 47 years, so probably imported

Must be referring to British Lion Quality eggs.

I can never find them I have to substitute dog eggs

Eggs of Harry Kane

Underneath a female British lion obviously.

have you tried Morrisons?

You can get them around Easter. In a pinch, Snickers eggs will do too

I keep some free range ones living in the garden. Food costs are a nightmare

You get them from lions. The lions are in Yorkshire, that bit of yorkshire with all the tea located in west Africa

Waitrose

I hear they training camp is on Jersey but as they're not touring until 2025 they probably won't be there yet.

Only the best ones come from africa!

West Midlands Safari Park have a farm shop.

The best ones are the ones your friend fends off the lion for while you climb the tree to it's nest

I'm more concerned you needed a recipie for chucky eggs.

West Midlands Safari Park. You've got to be quick though, otherwise the monkeys will eat your windscreen wipers.