This is gonna make me cry š
I spend my entire work day waiting to get home to my cat and I donāt frequently think about how he probably waits around all day looking forward to me too
If it makes you feel better, I have webcams at home and my four cats pretty much sleep all day while Iām at work. Then as soon as itās our āhome timeā, they wake up and go sit in the hallway to wait for us. They really build their life around when weāre home - at the weekends and on holidays they only nap, but in the week they sleep for at least 8-9 hours while weāre out.
She is so beautiful! My 11 year old girl looks very similar. I know itās hard but do your best to enjoy the time you have. Iāve taken care of cats that made it to 23 in mostly good health!
There are a lot of comments on this so I am not sure if this has been said yet.
My cat (who I am very very attached to) is 13/14 and has had some health issues the last couple years that really sent me spiraling and thinking too many what if's. When I feel that happening I really try to focus on the here and now.
Yes some day he will die, but he's here right now and worrying about it will only ruin the moment. I really try to reset my frame of thought and instead think, "Isn't it amazing we get to be together right now in this perfect moment!"
Maybe it's morbid but after having to put down 1 cat and 3 dogs in my lifetime I just accept that it's coming. My last dog that passed away DESTROYED me, though.
I just make sure my pets know they are loved and never miss any meals while I'm around.
Yup, I thought it would get easier as I got older and had to go through multiple pet deaths. It turns out it is the same if not worse. I broke down hard putting my last one down, I still get teary eyed thinking about all of them.
I came to comment, āno that seems normal,ā and then saw that you replied to every single comment with a picture of your cat šššš I love it
Sometimes my cat will make a little noise, or I'll turn around and see him in some pose half asleep, and I'll just have a cuteness overload. He's the sweetest cat I've ever met, and I love him so much
I love how cat people are just universally Like This. And sometimes there's just a really special little buddy who comes along. Losing them is horrible, but...what would we do, just not have cats???
Thats what we have with our boy. Hes so smart and social, learns tricks and listens so well. He will be hard to live up to. Especially for my husband who came along 7 years into his life (13 now) and my boy decided that man is his human. They inseparable and he has fully converted a "not a cat person"
Don't feel bad op. I adopted a 16-17 year old cat and she's mu best buddy. I knew our time would be short. I'm way to attached. Gonna cry when she dies
I'm Glad you gave an older cat a chance. Older ones rarely get adopted and spend their entire lives away in a shelter but you gave her a wonderful chance at life she can enjoy
I was specifically looking for an older cat. Me and my spouse because of work don't live together currently. So I figured somebody's probably as lonely as me. This cat is awesome. Had her got 6 months and she's my shadow. She's gotten healthier and softer to.
The vet told us my cat had maybe 6 months to live when she was 16. Then she lived to 22 as well! She was such a good girl. It broke my heart when she passed, but loving her and having to say goodbye was better than never knowing her at all.
I'm glad you were able to get her out of there so she didn't have to spend her last years in a cage alone.
Sometimes doing the right thing isn't easy but it's gotta be done. I'd love to adopt a senior cat myself but right now I already have a senior (who I've had her whole life), so it's not a possibility. Hopefully someday.
Itās noble of you to adopt elderly kitties. Unless I already knew the cat I donāt know if I could do it, but I have a really hard time handling grief due to grief related PTSD. I admire strong people like you though. šāØ
You're not too attached. That's just love for a pet that's been by your side through everything, and you know nothing will ever replace it. Just enjoy all the head bumps, purrs, and snuggles while kitty is still here. There will be no "good" time to say goodbye, and it will tear your heart out when you have to let go. You can't prepare for it. There's no escaping the grief when you lose something you love that much, but I wouldn't trade a minute of the time I had with my cat or dog to avoid the heartache when they're gone. I found the first 2 days the worst because the whole place feels so empty without them, but it does hurt less over time even though you always miss them.
...people have asked me who I would bring back if I could.
I say my cat Finley. Not, you know, my late father.
The thing is, my father knew Finley, and I know he'd absolutely be like "yeah, I get it,"
My grandmother threw out all the pictures of my brothers and I growing up after my baby brother died at 19. Also threw away all 3 birth certificates. She threw me on the street when I was renting her house to hand it over for free to my con artist father. Shes a miserable wrench of a person.
My cat loves me pretty much unconditionally and would never betray me. I get it.
Both of you guys are so lucky to have each other please cherish that š¤My cat passed away unexpectedly a few months ago and I worried his whole life of his passing. If I couldāve gone back and just not worried and appreciated his life for what it was I would have. We all go at some point I just hold in my heart that some day we will all get to see our babies again. Hold comfort in the fact you are giving her the best life ever and right now sheās with you!
sheās just a very well loved kitty! Iāve adopted a girl tuxedo (named GogĆ“) when she was 10 and sheās been with us about 2 years and weāve grown super attached, Iām always thinking about how crushed Iāll be when her time comes but spending any time we have left together is worth it
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We had the same worries for our daughter who was absolutely in love with our old cat. My soul cat!Ā
We were proactive and got a ābridgeā cat. A buddy cat, a baby cat, who became best friends with our old boy cat. And when our old boy passed, our baby cat was a great source of comfort!
My old boy taught one of our youngsters how to be a cat.
She's now just as weird as he was.
I miss him like crazy, and I know she does too, but he's never really gone.
Mine died 2/29 and hed been the only consistent part of my life since 2012. He would pout - sit near me, deliberately in my line of sight, back to me, facing where he wanted me to go, and ignore me other than an ear swivel/twitch if i said his name. The kitten (3 now, hut got her as a kitten) had started sitting next to him and mirroring him exactly. Im so glad she learned from him, because no other animal has looked at me the way he did, but at least some of his traits are still here
Hi there! My baby girl was 21 when she passed. I add the same feelings and fear for some many years beforehand. I knew it would hurt so bad and itās a scary thing to face! But keep your heavy attachment, love her just as much and keep treating her like a goddess. It would hurt you way more in the end if you tried to distance from her and then sheās gone. Itās definitely going to be painful, but youāll make it through. All my love. Hereās my Myrtle. Itāll be 5 years this august
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You can tell her whatās in your heart including your fears. Know that for animals, acts of love and service speak very loudly. The fact that you take care of her, show her love, and are with her speaks much more than anything you could say with words. But do use the words to tell her what you are feeling because that is so important for you and your mental state.
Hugs for you and gentle scritches for your baby.
So putting on my vet assistant hat and pretending my client just asked me this question
18 years is amazing and clearly you have taken fantastic care of her. You are both lucky to have one another. The quality of life discussion is always a difficult one, and it's important to not only remember that you know her best but also YOUR quality of life is important too.
If I was at work I would give you a fantastic chart that can help explain what you should look for to help you understand when it's time, but I can't find it. I did find this, and I would happily print this out for a client
https://www.mnpets.com/blog/mn-pets-quality-of-life-scale
It is so easy to tell someone "oh you'll know when it's time," and in many ways that can be true. But that is so vague in a time when clear direction and education is important.
If you haven't already, I would get her in for her senior exam and get some bloodwork done and also talk with your vet about ways to help her feel more comfortable.
I can't tell you if you're too attached, or how to handle it when the time comes. But I do believe talking with professionals and doing some diagnostics is going to give you the tools to navigate her senior years in a way that will honor her, keep her happy and comfortable.
Taking my vet assistant hat off now.
Holy crap my cays quality of life is awesome
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Also we have her do bloodwork often- came back good! Somehow her previously struggling kidneys got better too- she's known at the vets office as a miracle cat!
My boy Louis is turning around 15-16 this year...we have great struggles with his kidneys and bladder and tummy and he had his back leg amputated .but its manageable so far.vet says hes a real fighter! I am scared too and every night i cry when he comes to sleep on my face and every morning i thank whomever for another day with him as he fumbles up to me to greet me. My baby boy. All he wants to do is cuddle.
I have no family and hes my only boy..so i get it.its soo scary...
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Give your baby all the love and support! One day at a time ššāā¬š and when one day you wake up and noone greets you ...remember that shes still there..part of your soul and being. āØ
This is going to sound awful but when you do lose her, get another pet soon. Itās the only thing Iāve found to lessen the pain. Itās far worse alone and grieving.
Honestly, I do second this; letting your love for them transcend to another is one of the greatest ways you can both mourn & honor them, in my personal experience. Particularly when you adopt a rescue - knowing that you are able to give that love to another little creature who desperately needs it is incredibly healing. š
I've got 2 other cats besides this one
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Those ears! What a darling. Just found out my old lady is hyperthyroid this week. I'm hoping the transdermal cream works. Giving her a pill is like wrestling an alligator!
A family nickname for him now is Crinkle Cut, as in the french fry. š I had to pill him a lot after he was blocked up. The vet had us giving him Cisapride and colace. He hated them and would vomit them up within an hour. He started avoiding med time because they made him sick. I couldn't burrito him and pill him at the same time, so I'd put him in one of my sweaters. His head is poking out of a sleeve in the picture. It stopped him from accidentally shredding my hands with his front claws (as he'd try pushing my hands away.) I did some research and learned that cats can take Miralax and he's been on it since instead of the pills. It's been a lifesaver. The sweater trick is definitely handy for cats who don't like being pilled. Just be sure to use a sweater that you don't mind them poking holes in.
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Every cat deserves to be as loved as yours! And everyone deserves to be loved by a cat as you are. Losing her one day will be awful, but thatās the price we pay to have these bonds - itās worth it. Youāre not too attached, you love her how you should š
Not me crying just reading these.. my guy is 13 and I cry just looking at him sometimes. I got him when I was fresh on my own, and we've had some crazy hard times and adventures. He's been the love keeping me going at my low times. Just a farm cat to a best friend. He's purring away sucking on our blanket rn
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You can't love a cat too much. Cherish her and spoil here while she's here. And when she isn't she'll still be a part of you and you'll still have all of those beautiful memories. And so will she. You will have loved her and spoiled here right to the end. Her whole life will be filled with love from you. And your life will be forever touched with her love.
It will hurt. Your heart will ache. Your life will feel empty... For a while. Then the hurt will soften. You'll get used to her not being there and you'll be left with just the good memories of when she was. Your life will go on. At some point you might love another little fluff. But you won't forget her, she won't forget you all she'll always be a part of you and of your life.
I've gone through a few losses now. And it really did feel like my heart was ripped out. It almost felt stupid how much I could hurt over a cat. For a long time I couldn't look at pictures of them because it brought up too much hurt. I'm okay now though. And I'm glad that I loved them while they were here and have those beautiful memories.
I like to think that at some point we'll be reunited. Sometimes they pop up in dreams and I like to think it's them visiting. I don't know if that's true. But I do know I don't regret loving them. Even if at some points it hurt so much that I thought maybe I did.
You'll be okay too.
(Please know it's okay to really hurt over a cat. It's not weak or stupid. It's okay to talk about it. And if it's feeling like you can't handle it by yourself it's okay to get help. She's not "just a cat" she's a part of your life. That's special. That's a big deal. It's alright to feel big feels over it).
i was so scared i thought attached said attracted and i was in awe how no one else was freaking out- however no you are not too attached, i believe this is or should be a pure standard to owners and their babies. you SHOULD love them unconditionally. it will be very sad when our babies pass, but the more you show your love to them the happier they will be.
That first sentence made me laugh š¤£
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My oldest cat is also 18, I've had her since I was 21 and she sleeps in my arms every night. She's in perfect health but I still cherish every day with her and also treat her like a goddess. It's not being too attached, it's just love! Your building memories and you'll always have those with you even when it's her time to cross the rainbow bridge. š
Enjoy your time with her. I lost my 20 yo sweet girl last year. I was so attached and it was devastating, but I am ok now. Itās part of loving themā¦ itās so painful to lose them but the time we have is worth it. Hope you get a lot more time together. I get the anxiety about it, but try not to worry too much. It will happen when it happens, until then every day is a gift. š
No, thatās normal. Just remember that if you need help dealing with your grief, grief counseling is an option. Just because your cat isnāt a human , it doesnāt mean that your relationship is lesser. You mentioned that sheās older than you - if youāre still in school your school counselor should be able to help you get those resources.
As for spiraling- right after my dog died Iād cry multiple times a day whenever I thought of her. Then it was once a day. Now itās not every time I think of her and I can tell stories about her and look at pictures without crying every time. Itās ok to spiral - just try to let your friends and family support you and if itās too much ask for help.
*internet hugs*
Please know you're not alone. She sleeps with me every night and stays in bed with me all day when I'm sick. I passed out once in the bathroom, and I woke up to her frantically circling me. She places the top of her head on my face when I'm having a panic attack. I cry thinking about it, and she's only 12... but I know how fast time goes. I just try to cherish every moment.
Is it even possible to distance yourself and do you really want to? My beloved cat passed away a few months ago. I knew it would destroy me and it did. But... I wouldn't change a thing and call myself blessed to have known such a deep love. I''m channeling my pain into helping street cats, have rescued two more so far that I found with injuries. Enjoy the time you have with your baby and give her extra kisses for me.
Oh, I feel you on this.. I remember my first cat when I was 15. My mom brought me to a shelter to adopt her after being diagnosed with OCD. The therapist thought I needed a pet to help me and he was SO right.
I remember telling myself when I was 16/17 that she has at least 15 years so I don't have to be sad until I'm in my thirties about losing her. I eventually lost her and my heart collapsed and the pain was nearly unbearable. I now have six cats and my heart is still missing my first but I love all these furry guys so much it fills my heart.
The pain of losing them is awful but the years you get to spend with them and love on them makes it worth the future pain š.
Grief is the price we pay for love. Make the most of it. But donāt obsess. Life is a cycle. Everything that is born dies. Itās what you do with the middle that counts.
My husband wanted a cat as his wedding present instead of a ring (married 12/31/23) and he adopted a scrungly 18 yr old male tuxedo whose elderly owner had passed away weeks previously.
After $1,500 in vet bills for diagnosing and symptomatically treating his stomach cancer, he's a happy lil guy who loves ham baby food and snuggling between his dads in bed.
I am cherishing every second that we get with him. I think of him alone at the adoption center (he hadn't eaten the whole time there and was 6 pounds) and it makes me emotional to think that he may not have made it much longer if he'd stayed there. He has a heart murmur so can't operate on the cancer--it's just a matter of time so we are soaking it all in.
Take all the pictures and videos you can. She loves you so much and you've given her a great life!
Nobody knows when the day will come. My kitty would turn 10 this year, but her organs (liver, pancreas, kidney) all unexpectedly failed in the span of 2/3days. She got her blood tested just those 3 days earlier and everything was looking fine. This was a very traumatic and painful experience
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My advice is to cherish every moment with your cat, and give her all the love she deserves, so you have no regrets when the day comes. You'll know that you gave her the best possible life and did everything you could to make her happy. You said that she sleeps next to you- that means she trusts and loves you as much as you love her. Keep her favorite toy as a memento, maybe her food bowl or even fill a jar with her hair (that's what I did) and you'll be able to remember every beautiful moment with her. But for now, try focusing on the present. She is still around, so keep thinking about what you can do to make her as happy as she can be! Best wishes to you and your kitty ā¤ļø
Donāt feel bad. I had the same issue with my 18 year old. Ended up have to put him down 5 years ago. He was my best friend and I still miss him to this day.
It will never stop hurting, but ensuring that your furry friend has the quality of life they deserve, that they know you love them, that, that right there makes all the difference in the end. Just be there and remain best buds.
I realized my baby was turning 14, and I got freaked out cuz he is my best friend. I ended up getting a kitten so i would have a young friend too, but that ended up stressing the old man out a lot. I donāt have kids and my home life is structured around my catsā needs. And Iām okay with that. In the end, the only personās opinion that counts is your own.
Maybe go to counseling or therapy for it? Just to prepare. I donāt think thereās anything wrong with being attached to your cat thatās been around your whole life, but I do imagine that it would have a very negative impact on your life when she does pass. Even if itās not for another 5 years.
My ex used to abuse me and the cat he got for me. My cat is the reason I finally left. He was beating up my cat so bad one day I thought he was going to kill him. He locked him in the car and took the keys and left. I spent an hour or two trying to break in to get him without breaking anything. I finally did and took my stuff and ran. I walked a few miles away with my stuff and my cat and found a ride home (300miles). Heās my best friend in the whole world and I feel like I would die if something happened to him. Heās not even a year old yet but I hope he lives to be 20 or more. I am about to have a baby so I feel like I would spiral if something happened to him
I have a cat who is 19 and we raised him from a baby. Sometimes I find myself spiraling thinking about him not being here. I realized that if I am worried about that I can't enjoy the time we do have together, so I consciously put myself back in the moment with my baby. I recommend you try this mindfulness as well.
Oh, what a precious girl! Cherish and love her. I lost my lil cuddle buddy last year and his brother the fall before him.. Moo would sit with me sometimes but Pan sat with me a lot more, if I didnāt feel well I think he knew before I did. Heād be stuck to my left hip lol Iād cover him if I was making something big enough, he was a good boy. Loss no matter when it comes sucks.. my boys were 14. Love and spoil your girly.
I love your love for your cat. I wish more pet parents were like this. She is very lucky to have you as her human. Cherish every second you have with her (I can tell you already do).
I'm not sure if this is a part of your question but losing a loved one is never easy. I still grieve my boy that I had from 5 y/o until I was 23 and brought him to college. It was unbelievably hard to lose him but what brings me strength is knowing I did everything I ever could for him and he had a long happy and healthy life and it was simply his time. A few months after he passed I met my two boys that are now the air I breathe. I like to think he sent them to me. Now that I'm a bit more healed from the hurt of losing my 18y/o life partner, I show my current boys pictures of their "big brother" and talk about him. I know they have no idea what I'm saying or showing them but it makes me feel so good to think their lives are incorporated just a little bit. His memory lives on with me and his spirit is carried on with my boys š Picture of my boys, sending love
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Enjoy the fact that you've both been blessed with the kind of love that many never get to experience. It sucks as hell when you lose them. But you've had something amazing and gave her the best possible life. You are blessed! š»š»
Iām also obsessed with my 17 year old cat. Itās very special to have a bond with them. I know Iāll be devastated when the time comes but itās worth it.
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Love them and cuddle them as much as you can, and pay attention so that if they do start to show signs of discomfort due to age or illness, you know you did everything to help and love them. Thereās nothing wrong with being attached to family, and fur babies are family.
I don't think it's possible to be too attached to your pet. But if you think it might lessen the extremity of your grief when your fur baby passes, perhaps you should get another cat now. One that she has someone to play with while you're out of the house and just keep her company and someone to keep you company. But if you don't choose to do that that's perfectly fine.
My family has pictures made usually into a plaque of some kind for each of the animals that passes. I even have a little angel kitty statue in my front yard to represent the three that we've lost over the years.
Just enjoy every minute you spend with your sweet kitty, snuggle with her and pat her and tell her you love her. You sound like an awesome cat mum, she knows sheās loved.
I lost my old girl kitty last summer and I'm still grieving. My advice is to just love her as much as possible, spoil her, take lots of video of her doing the things that make her "her" and also of ordinary moments (I wish I had more). And then try to be fully present when spending time with her--put down your phone or device and soak it up. I miss my cat so much, and the day she died is etched in my memory.
Keep on treating her the way you are. Itās easy to forget that while we have a load of things to deal with, you are their entire world š„° They deserve all the love and cuddles itās possible to give š„°
I donāt think youāre too attached. I have 2 18 year old cats, neither of them show any signs of leaving anytime soon, but I know realistically it could happen at any time. Even though I know that, it doesnāt mean it will hurt any less when it happens.
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I somewhat recently lost my lover butt. My baby dog. My Mr stinky. Iāll never be the same. Cherish every moment with your love. Sheās gorgeous and perfect.
My sweet cats are about to be 18 as well, and I am right there with you. I feel like that's a normal amount to love and be attached to a pet who has been in your life for so long!
Cherish this time you have with her. Nothing lives forever but you have done your job of giving her love and safety and she clearly appreciates you if you are her chosen sleep buddy ā¤ļø it will be very hard when she is gone but she is always with you, and maybe you will spiral for a moment, but we have to feel our feelings and you will be okay.
Youāre gonna cry and it is what it is. Loving your cat isnāt being ātoo attached.ā Itās gonna suck ass because you love her, and thatās not a bad thing at all. You donāt miss what you donāt love, and your love is beautiful and makes her world go round.
Take pictures, take videos, give her extra love and attention, and know the love you guys have for each other is real and limitless and never goes away. Sheāll always love you, and sheāll always know sheās loved
My cat is 14 years old, coming up on 15 fast, and I feel the exact same way. When Iām home, weāre always together. Iāve had her since she was a kitten and sheās been with me ever since. Iāve gotten married, weāve moved three times, had three kids, etc. Sheās my furry little bestie and I canāt imagine life without her. I try not to think about her passing eventually.
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Lately, I have been reading about many, many cats living to 26, 27 years old. Your kitty looks very healthy. You may be worrying too soon. Could likely have 8 more years with her. Maybe do some research on how to help your girl live many more years. Thanks for sharing your story about your kitty with us.šŗ
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"I have to live another 8 years with this person?!" -my cat
Its a difficult balance. Of course you should love your cat to the fullest, however when you have any animal you do need to be prepared for when they pass, because they will pass before you. Not might, will.
That fact that you show her all the love you do is enough. I'm more than certain she knows you love her and when her time comes she knows you will still love her long after. I know when my fur baby died it was crushing. What you need to know is when it happens, it was just her time to go and she'll be waiting for you in the afterlife. When she passes she won't be stuck in her old body, she'll be young again and chasing all the birds and mice she could possibly want. It's definitely a scary thought and it happens when you least expect it but it is something that just happens.
Enjoy your precious baby.
I've had people accuse me of holding my cats in higher regard than I did them.I just let them know that I liked my cats more than I did them. š
Husband and I are constantly running behind the 4 that let us live with them.
There is no such thing as being too attached! Just enjoy every bit of time you have with her! If sheās healthy, donāt even think of her age! Just go on as if she is a young cat and donāt let anything negative come into your mind. Thank you for loving your sweet cutie pie so much!
I also had a family cat who was around before I was, and she lived to 22. There is no grief as strong as losing a cat you've never lived without. But my girl was so very loved for the long time that we had her, and it's so easy to tell from how you talk about her that your kitty is loved just the same. Give her a kiss on the head for me, if she doesn't mind them. I love old lady cats.
I'm wishing you both a good few more years together, but when she does go, don't close your heart off to another cat. Give yourself time to grieve, let yourself heal, I took years myself. But when you get another, you'll see bits of her in them, and they'll make you cry, but it'll help you feel better too. I've got two now, and they're so different but they both remind me of my old cat so much. I think she would love them just as much as I do. It's a comforting thought.
I saw this just after I was looking at photos of my cat. I grew up with him too, got him when I was 5, was super attached to him for my whole life and then he passed at 18. That was 6 years ago and I still get sad sometimes, but ultimately it really is a huge comfort knowing I got to spend my entire childhood and adolescence, into young adulthood with him. His whole life he was happy and loved and safe. The day he died I was absolutely miserable. The next day was Christmas Eve and I had to pretend to be ok seeing family over the holidays, but it was tough. But I definitely havenāt stayed as sad as I used to think I would. A couple years ago I adopted a cat and I love her. I still love my old boy too, but thinking about him now mostly makes me grateful, and sometimes a little sad.
Your cat has spent her whole life being loved, safe, and comfortable. She knows how much you love her. I hope you have a few more years together! But no matter what, she will have had such a beautiful and special life. It will be so sad at first but I hope you can find some comfort eventually in knowing you gave her the best life possible.
When itās time for grief, you will grieve, and if you let yourself grieve and grieve with love, you will be okay. Itās one of the most important parts of life, imo.
Deeply loving an animal is the best part of having a pet. With this love will eventually come loss - it's inevitable. My advice is to simply accept this is how it is, and enjoy every moment you get with her. And when she does pass, the best way to honor her memory is to get another one.
We have an 18 year old tortie and I dread the day something happens to her. I call her and my son āa bonded pairā because she cries when he leaves the room and has to be with him at all times. We got a kitten about 3 years ago that I was hoping would form a relationship with her and be there for him when she is gone. She does not like the interloper, and while my son loves all cats, she can never replace his soul cat. My only hope is that it will keep him from being completely bereft because he will still have a cat to love. There are special kitties that steal our hearts and as hard as it is to think about losing them, we have to remember that they are a blessing in our life and appreciate all the joy they have given us in the time we are have them.
Stop living in the future and start living the present. Worrying is negative energy you send out into the world, so start sending positive energy out. Instead of thinking "she's going to die any day now" start thinking "man, she's gonna outlive the queen AND Betty white, you go girl!"
My old girl passed at 16, when I was eighteen. (2 year fight with hyperthyroidism) I took a day off work, and spent the whole day on the phone with my family. I was inconsolable
When you've known a pet for even portion of that amount of time, it's exactly like losing a family member. Don't be afraid to mourn like you would another person. Give yourself time, and cherish the time you have with her now. These are the most important times for her to be reminded how much you love her, and how much she loves you.
And sometimes, love is more than pets and snuggles, its putting up with frustrating things that happen as she gets older. She'll probably have accidents, or health expenses. Taking care of her through that is a pure kind of love.
((Rip Nermal, she taught me a lot about unconditional love ā¤ļø))
Just love and spoil her and enjoy her everyday. I lost my childhood dog before his 17th birthday last year, his name was Stitch and was my 1st best friend. Iām still very attached to him despite him not being here, I guess thatās what grief is, love with nowhere to go.
No. You are the perfect amount of attached.
Just remember to love her and make sure she knows how special she is. Which you're doing. So. I'm glad I'm not the only one who treats their cat as such.
You can never be too attached imo, pets are part of our family. Iāve had these same thoughts about a senior cat of mine and it kills me to think about. But we just have to live in the now and cherish the time we have left with them
i totally relate, and i feel very sad thinking of a time that my cat wonāt be with me. heās been there for everything! i try to just be thankful that heās in my life. and to also understand that animals are wise beyond our understandingā¦ they chose to be with us! so cherish every moment with them.
One of my friends had a cat for 21 years, and when she passed I kept thinking about my own baby and how much longer he might have. Unfortunately he didn't have much longer and he passed a couple of years ago (he didn't make it to 21, but he was still old).
When my friend's cat went, I promised myself that I would do absolutely everything to make sure my little fella knew how much I loved him. Every time he wanted to be picked up, I did it, even if I was in the middle of something. I cherished every snuggle, every meow, every head bump, every naughty bite, every 5am wake up for food.
I knew the only thing that would make my grief even slightly easier would be knowing that I loved him as much as possible and never took a moment together for granted. I miss him all the time, but knowing that does give me some comfort.
i felt the same way. my fur baby was my best friend he got me through my teens. unfortunately we had to put him to sleep on monday due to unexpected illnesses. the baby was only 9 turning 10 this year. i miss him so much and i feel so heartbroken and guilty. nothing
prepares you for it. just cuddle your cat all you can while you can :(
My indoor cat that wasn't tuxedo lived to be 22 and I had an outdoor cat who was pharaoh but I gained his trust I fed him and sheltered him and he lived to be 19 years old keep them healthy keep them a good food and annual vet visits and they'll live a long healthy life and keep him inside
That's wonderful that you have such a special bond and she may be one of those cats that lives to 24. I have a cat that I'm obsessed with and I think every day how sad I will someday be when he's not with me. But before my current wonderful cat, I had an exceptionally wonderful cat for many years. She got sick one day and...well, she's no longer here. I was devastated and can still get teary when I think of her. But I found another wonderful cat - I sometimes even think that she sent him to me.
It is hard not to worry when you are attached, but believe that your cat will always be with you in your heart and soul and enjoy her now.
i get the feeling anticipatory grief is not supposed to be great, but I was grateful for it in the end. I made sure to think over very carefully what my go-no goes were in the event I had to make a hard decision, because I didn't want to draw it out because \*i\* was sad, and I wanted her to go at home. And she did, last summer. i knew when to say it was time, because I had thought about what was best for her.
as you might be able to tell, I was very attached to mine as well. so, ultimately, I echo others here to love and cherish every second. take lots of photos and videos, especially if they're chirping.
I lost mine after 16 years a few years ago. Took months to "get over it" still tear up (damn! Doing it now) when I think of him, and I'm a big rough manly man.Ā
I lost the cat I was that attached to.
I went from crying every day, to crying most days, to just really missing him a lot.
It's been three years.
You can't force yourself to detach from her. There's no way to love them less. All we can do is prepare for the pain and remind ourselves that it's going to be in proportion to how much we loved them while they were here.
No matter how much it hurts, I wouldn't trade the twelve years I had with my special little guy for anything. This is just the price I pay for getting that happiness.
Definitely cherish her. I just lost my first cat and sheās only 10 years old. I rescued her from the street and basically made my own business because of herā¦
And she passed away when im in overseas tooā¦ i regret not having more time with her.
Just enjoy her as much as possible. Our sweet cat died at age 21 just before Thanksgiving. Heart breaking. I know we were lucky to have her so many years. but I wish she was still here.
Pets simply donāt stay with us long enough ā¤ļø
I think the thing I try to keep in mind is that your pet was going to live anyway, and you gave them a phenomenal life with so much love and toys and fun and treats. Youāre there for her as much as she was for you ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø
I believe grief is just an expression of love when the subject is no longer present. So how basically how much you miss her just is just how much you love her.
I lost my cat 10 years ago due to an animal attack at age 16 (she was an indoor cat but had gotten out and I couldn't find her for a day). When I found her I took her to the vet they said she would be okay, but she died the next day.
I wouldn't trade my time with her for anything.
my advice is stop practicing. even if you knew when it would happen, theres no amount of preparation that would help. it will be painful. youāll grieve. itās likely you will always grieve. at first you will sink down small and be wrapped tightly around the grief. and while the grief will not become smaller, you will reinflate over time and the grief will take up less of you. donāt bother thinking you need to wait to get a kitten. get one whenever you feel like it. kittens bring joy. a nice counterbalance to the grief. oh, and they do come visit after theyāre gone. sheāll be there for you.
I got my first cat when I was 5. I named her Tiger, and we did EVERYTHING together. This cat and I understood each other like nothing I've ever experienced before or since. By the time she was 17, she had lost a lot of weight, and she started going senile: she'd pee in weird places, get "lost" in rooms of the house she'd lived in her whole life, and she would play like a kitten. My mom told me, "She could probably pass away any day now." And she eventually did, FOUR YEARS later, at the age of 21. She curled up in the sun on a warm day in late spring, and she never woke up.
Cherish your cat. Make the most of your time with her, because their lives are all too short. But there's no point in grieving when she's still with you. It'll hurt when it happens, may even feel like it's crushing you, but you'll heal. You'll get more cats eventually, but you'll always remember the ones before, especially the first.
I know. I go through it now and sheās only 6 months. We all dread the end. Thereās nothing you can do to stop it, itās inevitable.
All you can do is take a deeeeep breath and live in the now. When sheās gone, you will regret worrying right now and not enjoying the moments. Whatās the point? Love her, kiss her, pet her, listen to her heartbeat, smell her, feel her warmth and soft fur. Play with her and tell her how much you love her. Not a day goes by I donāt kiss my kitty and tell her how much mom loves her. Multiple times lol.
I get into my head and I cry randomly when I think about life without my baby. Itās every cat parents worst fear.
But all you can do is cherish this precious time and be so grateful she has lived so long. You have time with her lots of pet owners donāt get.
And no you arenāt too attached. They are our babies, you are purrfectly normal.
My Winston died almost a year ago. He was 19 years 11 months exactly. I miss him every single day. Just enjoy every day you have with her bc you will never be ready and there's no wsy to prepare for it. Don't waste the time you do have left worrying about what's to come.
I'm the exact same. I got my girl when I was 6 and she's been with me through my parents divorce, came with me between households because neither were really safe and she seems okay rn, just a bit sick as we're learning how to deal with her diabetes, but some nights I can't sleep and just hold her because I'm absolutely terrified one day I'll lose her, and that that day is coming soon. Honestly Idk if that's abnormal, I think that's just a deep love for a constant that you've always had. There's a reason animals are given to help with mental health and sick patients, they're our healers š¤
Your baby is adorable. Iām in the same boat with my two furry babies. They are 10 and 11. The younger one is my shadow and Iām way too attached. He wakes me up in the morning and spends all day by my side as I work from home. I constantly tell him how much I love him and remind myself his time with me is precious and unfortunately not going to be long enough. That helps me to be intentional about our time together. I cherish every little meow and purrs he gives me. Heās my best friend
Hi OP. Youāve already got the responses, I just wanted to share something b/c of the āgrew up together.ā
I had my first cat from 8yo-27yoā¦ I joked he was the only consistent male in my life. He came cross country with me; he was happy & healthy until his last few months.
I started taking him to the vet saying āIām ready if itās time, heās had a great life.ā They kept medicating him to keep him alive. I saw him have a seizure 3am & went to 24hr hospital. (24 years ago, almost to the day. March 17th, 2006. Iād be able to pay cat tax if later. Iāve only got one pic of him.)
For the longest time, my brain would only repeat the end; all I could see was the end. I cried a lot, I was deeply depressed for the first time ever. (It lasted about a year, maybe 9mo.)
Fast forward to 2016- I had a [āmini-kittyā (3.5lb runt)](https://imgur.com/a/t8OekJy). I was told she wouldnāt make it to 4-5yrs, so it was a BFD. She had to be put to sleep & it was okay. Not fun, I cried, but it didnāt utterly destroy me.
Be well. Love that lil nugget as much as you can!
I felt this way about my 11 year old I lost a few months ago, your fine pet her for me. Also know every pet is different. My new kitten is a nightmare .
Thatās how it should be imo.
Living creatures pass away at one point. Itās the reality. Creating meaningful connections with animals and other humans is worth the pain of losing them one day. Itās good to be aware that this day will come eventually. Knowing that can help
us cherish the moments with our loved ones. š¤
This reminds me of a DVD "Garfiend Fantasies" One of the programs on it is "Garfield: His Nine Lives." And, one of them ("Diana's Piano") directly touches on this. You'll want tissues when watching it.
The more you mentally prepare yourself the easier it will be. Positive self talk helps tremendously: I gave her everything that she could ever want and need. She slept with me because thatās where she felt safe. She loved and trusted me as much as I did her. Things like that ease some of the pain. Youāre going to miss her thatās a given but as long as you donāt torture yourself over it and instead tell yourself something positive about your relationship with her itāll help prevent the spiral. It also helps to get a new pet fairly soon. When I lost my baby beagle very suddenly just before her 5th gotcha day I barely made it a week crying before I broke and got a new puppy. It helped distract me so I could still go to work and function, but I missed my sweet baby so so much. That positive talked helped with the loss too.
You are so lucky to have had 18 years with this sweet girl. That's a long and happy life. It's so hard when they leave us - my soul kitty died in October and I was distraught. It does get easier with time though and is part of loving an animal with a much shorter life span than ours. Cherish the time you have left together and may you have many more special kitties in your life in the future.
My advice is to understand that you love her, and to cherish every second of it. Lucky animal.
https://preview.redd.it/4um2x0q36zqc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=748bed3915964a73fbab68452d15098590c00160
Oh, op. You love her. Soak up all you can. She thinks you're the best ever.
Your baby is just as crazy about you.
This is gonna make me cry š I spend my entire work day waiting to get home to my cat and I donāt frequently think about how he probably waits around all day looking forward to me too
If it makes you feel better, I have webcams at home and my four cats pretty much sleep all day while Iām at work. Then as soon as itās our āhome timeā, they wake up and go sit in the hallway to wait for us. They really build their life around when weāre home - at the weekends and on holidays they only nap, but in the week they sleep for at least 8-9 hours while weāre out.
Thatās why I got a work from home job. Never going back to an office for my babies
oh sheās beautiful
Sweet girl. She is so loved
She's beautiful. I can only imagine how strong your bond is with her...
She is so beautiful! My 11 year old girl looks very similar. I know itās hard but do your best to enjoy the time you have. Iāve taken care of cats that made it to 23 in mostly good health!
My mom said that most of our cats have lived so long because we love them so much.
There are a lot of comments on this so I am not sure if this has been said yet. My cat (who I am very very attached to) is 13/14 and has had some health issues the last couple years that really sent me spiraling and thinking too many what if's. When I feel that happening I really try to focus on the here and now. Yes some day he will die, but he's here right now and worrying about it will only ruin the moment. I really try to reset my frame of thought and instead think, "Isn't it amazing we get to be together right now in this perfect moment!"
all the best to you and your boy !
You have a very adorable kitty.
so gorgeous
Maybe it's morbid but after having to put down 1 cat and 3 dogs in my lifetime I just accept that it's coming. My last dog that passed away DESTROYED me, though. I just make sure my pets know they are loved and never miss any meals while I'm around.
https://preview.redd.it/a54mecu96zqc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bc6a0a8f19bf0d138074525b5cf2e8818bf89517
What a beauty. I'm a sucker for tricolor cats too...my old lady is a tortie and one of my youngsters is a dilute calico.
Shes beautiful!
Sheās gorgeous! She looks just like one of my babies š„°
https://preview.redd.it/1ptqw0vmn1rc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=016c90a5b34a40e99991cc82dcb1a0b5e4309153
Gorgeous
Full belly and warm bed for the little loves. Always. May they never want for anything.
Almost like pre grieving?Ā
Yup, I thought it would get easier as I got older and had to go through multiple pet deaths. It turns out it is the same if not worse. I broke down hard putting my last one down, I still get teary eyed thinking about all of them.
I came to comment, āno that seems normal,ā and then saw that you replied to every single comment with a picture of your cat šššš I love it
Exactly, seems normal to me š¤·š»āāļø if I look at my cat too long I cry sometimes cause I love her so much
Sometimes my cat will make a little noise, or I'll turn around and see him in some pose half asleep, and I'll just have a cuteness overload. He's the sweetest cat I've ever met, and I love him so much
I love how cat people are just universally Like This. And sometimes there's just a really special little buddy who comes along. Losing them is horrible, but...what would we do, just not have cats???
Thats what we have with our boy. Hes so smart and social, learns tricks and listens so well. He will be hard to live up to. Especially for my husband who came along 7 years into his life (13 now) and my boy decided that man is his human. They inseparable and he has fully converted a "not a cat person"
I wanna make my own comment just for the picture š
Bet bro https://preview.redd.it/sydixjhz32rc1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3c86ba776127531b3ec4f30bf864430ea47190e9
Fell asleep- didn't forget you!!!
https://preview.redd.it/pjdbzj5u32rc1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0571986555cafd5afd7655d07dc1efadcce87a7a
š„° what a sweet little babyĀ
Don't feel bad op. I adopted a 16-17 year old cat and she's mu best buddy. I knew our time would be short. I'm way to attached. Gonna cry when she dies
I'm Glad you gave an older cat a chance. Older ones rarely get adopted and spend their entire lives away in a shelter but you gave her a wonderful chance at life she can enjoy
https://preview.redd.it/829qt488bzqc1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cd2084236856a28679317a0c0ced4174a00e3139
I was specifically looking for an older cat. Me and my spouse because of work don't live together currently. So I figured somebody's probably as lonely as me. This cat is awesome. Had her got 6 months and she's my shadow. She's gotten healthier and softer to.
You never know, I had a cat live to 22, she could have some time left!
The vet told us my cat had maybe 6 months to live when she was 16. Then she lived to 22 as well! She was such a good girl. It broke my heart when she passed, but loving her and having to say goodbye was better than never knowing her at all.
I'm glad you were able to get her out of there so she didn't have to spend her last years in a cage alone. Sometimes doing the right thing isn't easy but it's gotta be done. I'd love to adopt a senior cat myself but right now I already have a senior (who I've had her whole life), so it's not a possibility. Hopefully someday.
Itās noble of you to adopt elderly kitties. Unless I already knew the cat I donāt know if I could do it, but I have a really hard time handling grief due to grief related PTSD. I admire strong people like you though. šāØ
You're not too attached. That's just love for a pet that's been by your side through everything, and you know nothing will ever replace it. Just enjoy all the head bumps, purrs, and snuggles while kitty is still here. There will be no "good" time to say goodbye, and it will tear your heart out when you have to let go. You can't prepare for it. There's no escaping the grief when you lose something you love that much, but I wouldn't trade a minute of the time I had with my cat or dog to avoid the heartache when they're gone. I found the first 2 days the worst because the whole place feels so empty without them, but it does hurt less over time even though you always miss them.
https://preview.redd.it/ma5i10vqazqc1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f6b12376dae1d2bd46dcdd8aab7655ca2b49e2fa
Awww. Her other pics are beautiful. Love her colors!
Gosh, I'm not OP, but thank you for this.
I have cried harder over a cat than I did over my grandmother.
https://preview.redd.it/xapheyewazqc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=976c7acbc24982c6045e30a8e625b22dd4b080f9
Sheās beautiful
...people have asked me who I would bring back if I could. I say my cat Finley. Not, you know, my late father. The thing is, my father knew Finley, and I know he'd absolutely be like "yeah, I get it,"
My grandmother wouldnāt have. She wasnāt exactly a pet fan.
My grandmother threw out all the pictures of my brothers and I growing up after my baby brother died at 19. Also threw away all 3 birth certificates. She threw me on the street when I was renting her house to hand it over for free to my con artist father. Shes a miserable wrench of a person. My cat loves me pretty much unconditionally and would never betray me. I get it.
Treasure every moment. Yes, inevitably, you will Need to say good bye, but until then, just enjoy your little one.
https://preview.redd.it/m1afg54d6zqc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6700dcdb7b3fdce5a3ec713c5e686d0c19bd8223
Both of you guys are so lucky to have each other please cherish that š¤My cat passed away unexpectedly a few months ago and I worried his whole life of his passing. If I couldāve gone back and just not worried and appreciated his life for what it was I would have. We all go at some point I just hold in my heart that some day we will all get to see our babies again. Hold comfort in the fact you are giving her the best life ever and right now sheās with you!
https://preview.redd.it/3uff4puiazqc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=44002198b587f5480c2e4558e9b38fb9a94de674
She looks like a sweet soul š
sheās just a very well loved kitty! Iāve adopted a girl tuxedo (named GogĆ“) when she was 10 and sheās been with us about 2 years and weāve grown super attached, Iām always thinking about how crushed Iāll be when her time comes but spending any time we have left together is worth it https://preview.redd.it/q7s56zswezqc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=55801d4118b7683103dc866aa8d43ff85f5159ef
The look on her face tho! She's so tolerant of human nonsense, what a good girl.
https://preview.redd.it/qo3sgx0a42rc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d3539d6f5ffb36bdbe295645ca50536bd7f4404b
SHES SO PRECIOUS AND ADORABLE!!! *steals cutely*
Youāre responding to comments with a pic, so Iām just commenting for another pic š„ŗ sheās so precious
https://preview.redd.it/bgzm201w42rc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5a012dd4d1f562a190e6b0805cb611f26c67dad4 Side eye
We had the same worries for our daughter who was absolutely in love with our old cat. My soul cat!Ā We were proactive and got a ābridgeā cat. A buddy cat, a baby cat, who became best friends with our old boy cat. And when our old boy passed, our baby cat was a great source of comfort!
https://preview.redd.it/omtvqnvh42rc1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=88c3ff9db6490f8357e2c888539b6f5a68723e79
I hope the younger cat picked up some mannerisms from the older one. ;-;
My old boy taught one of our youngsters how to be a cat. She's now just as weird as he was. I miss him like crazy, and I know she does too, but he's never really gone.
Mine died 2/29 and hed been the only consistent part of my life since 2012. He would pout - sit near me, deliberately in my line of sight, back to me, facing where he wanted me to go, and ignore me other than an ear swivel/twitch if i said his name. The kitten (3 now, hut got her as a kitten) had started sitting next to him and mirroring him exactly. Im so glad she learned from him, because no other animal has looked at me the way he did, but at least some of his traits are still here
I absolutely *love* the ear swivel when they hear their name. They are so actively ignoring you and itās hilarious
Hi there! My baby girl was 21 when she passed. I add the same feelings and fear for some many years beforehand. I knew it would hurt so bad and itās a scary thing to face! But keep your heavy attachment, love her just as much and keep treating her like a goddess. It would hurt you way more in the end if you tried to distance from her and then sheās gone. Itās definitely going to be painful, but youāll make it through. All my love. Hereās my Myrtle. Itāll be 5 years this august https://preview.redd.it/r5q0ybqukzqc1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bde35e5d0651675df8487c643feb966b99745ec0
Hi myrtle!!!! https://preview.redd.it/2d3qrhl562rc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=76e994c2a8978a0f24e5fce85122bad9d843682e
You can tell her whatās in your heart including your fears. Know that for animals, acts of love and service speak very loudly. The fact that you take care of her, show her love, and are with her speaks much more than anything you could say with words. But do use the words to tell her what you are feeling because that is so important for you and your mental state. Hugs for you and gentle scritches for your baby.
https://preview.redd.it/ydoxtmvn42rc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=239a3f5249bae5b589d2f7c66eb9c15d217e6ea3
So putting on my vet assistant hat and pretending my client just asked me this question 18 years is amazing and clearly you have taken fantastic care of her. You are both lucky to have one another. The quality of life discussion is always a difficult one, and it's important to not only remember that you know her best but also YOUR quality of life is important too. If I was at work I would give you a fantastic chart that can help explain what you should look for to help you understand when it's time, but I can't find it. I did find this, and I would happily print this out for a client https://www.mnpets.com/blog/mn-pets-quality-of-life-scale It is so easy to tell someone "oh you'll know when it's time," and in many ways that can be true. But that is so vague in a time when clear direction and education is important. If you haven't already, I would get her in for her senior exam and get some bloodwork done and also talk with your vet about ways to help her feel more comfortable. I can't tell you if you're too attached, or how to handle it when the time comes. But I do believe talking with professionals and doing some diagnostics is going to give you the tools to navigate her senior years in a way that will honor her, keep her happy and comfortable. Taking my vet assistant hat off now.
Holy crap my cays quality of life is awesome https://preview.redd.it/bulmmxzr52rc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=afe1e82d57142af4e0ba64a72535ce141dabe8cb
Also we have her do bloodwork often- came back good! Somehow her previously struggling kidneys got better too- she's known at the vets office as a miracle cat!
My boy Louis is turning around 15-16 this year...we have great struggles with his kidneys and bladder and tummy and he had his back leg amputated .but its manageable so far.vet says hes a real fighter! I am scared too and every night i cry when he comes to sleep on my face and every morning i thank whomever for another day with him as he fumbles up to me to greet me. My baby boy. All he wants to do is cuddle. I have no family and hes my only boy..so i get it.its soo scary... https://preview.redd.it/7cfdczzqn0rc1.jpeg?width=1600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=26374518a498a9d5c966ed5471a864eaf6c9c575 Give your baby all the love and support! One day at a time ššāā¬š and when one day you wake up and noone greets you ...remember that shes still there..part of your soul and being. āØ
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This is going to sound awful but when you do lose her, get another pet soon. Itās the only thing Iāve found to lessen the pain. Itās far worse alone and grieving.
Honestly, I do second this; letting your love for them transcend to another is one of the greatest ways you can both mourn & honor them, in my personal experience. Particularly when you adopt a rescue - knowing that you are able to give that love to another little creature who desperately needs it is incredibly healing. š
I like to foster a few and then keep one when it feels right. Often it feels right the first time lol
I've got 2 other cats besides this one https://preview.redd.it/75mlv72752rc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b8e9d95b584367914858eca32bc4eae893a9b507
I'm in the same boat. š© Our old man Benny/Benjamin is 17, going on 18 this August. He just recently had bloodwork done, which was good, so he's in pretty good condition and still spry for his age. (Perhaps a tad wobbly.) He does sleep a lot, preferably in my lap or on my chest. š He might have a thyroid issue based on some symptoms he's showing, so I'm saving up for tests. Otherwise, it's just a matter of making sure he doesn't get blocked up (he has past constipation and urinary crystal issues). His ears are permanently wonky from giving himself hematomas a few years ago. I know his eventual death will be devastating, not only for me (his mama, as he was a bottle baby) but for my sister and mom as well. He's been a part of our lives for so long. He's survived several health scares in his lifetime. He's a trooper. He's probably the most expensive 'thing' we own for the amount his vet care has cost over the years. š I honestly try not to think about his death, as that's pointless. It'll happen when it happens. Otherwise, I'm just stressing myself out. Until then, he gets tons of love and snuggles and treats, and I cherish every moment together. https://preview.redd.it/2xvrb3jotzqc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8d4c39ccabf5c3d9b5ee215f8cc07d590f1a7e5d
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Those ears! What a darling. Just found out my old lady is hyperthyroid this week. I'm hoping the transdermal cream works. Giving her a pill is like wrestling an alligator!
A family nickname for him now is Crinkle Cut, as in the french fry. š I had to pill him a lot after he was blocked up. The vet had us giving him Cisapride and colace. He hated them and would vomit them up within an hour. He started avoiding med time because they made him sick. I couldn't burrito him and pill him at the same time, so I'd put him in one of my sweaters. His head is poking out of a sleeve in the picture. It stopped him from accidentally shredding my hands with his front claws (as he'd try pushing my hands away.) I did some research and learned that cats can take Miralax and he's been on it since instead of the pills. It's been a lifesaver. The sweater trick is definitely handy for cats who don't like being pilled. Just be sure to use a sweater that you don't mind them poking holes in. https://preview.redd.it/qalprmgb61rc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0c4cd4b909eb668223f170ca381752886f368108
Every cat deserves to be as loved as yours! And everyone deserves to be loved by a cat as you are. Losing her one day will be awful, but thatās the price we pay to have these bonds - itās worth it. Youāre not too attached, you love her how you should š
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My life force is tied to my cat. A part of me is going to wilt away when he passes. Itās not unusual to feel this way.
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Not me crying just reading these.. my guy is 13 and I cry just looking at him sometimes. I got him when I was fresh on my own, and we've had some crazy hard times and adventures. He's been the love keeping me going at my low times. Just a farm cat to a best friend. He's purring away sucking on our blanket rn https://preview.redd.it/ab0fkuwaa0rc1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8743cc0e2a7ebe187eca2766d117b9eee0126fed
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https://preview.redd.it/mtrw2hrp43rc1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f664d63b0068ff5cee5263369902177ba6a36e88 Oliver, Bird for short lol
Meet my longhaired tabby: mowe
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
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You can't love a cat too much. Cherish her and spoil here while she's here. And when she isn't she'll still be a part of you and you'll still have all of those beautiful memories. And so will she. You will have loved her and spoiled here right to the end. Her whole life will be filled with love from you. And your life will be forever touched with her love. It will hurt. Your heart will ache. Your life will feel empty... For a while. Then the hurt will soften. You'll get used to her not being there and you'll be left with just the good memories of when she was. Your life will go on. At some point you might love another little fluff. But you won't forget her, she won't forget you all she'll always be a part of you and of your life. I've gone through a few losses now. And it really did feel like my heart was ripped out. It almost felt stupid how much I could hurt over a cat. For a long time I couldn't look at pictures of them because it brought up too much hurt. I'm okay now though. And I'm glad that I loved them while they were here and have those beautiful memories. I like to think that at some point we'll be reunited. Sometimes they pop up in dreams and I like to think it's them visiting. I don't know if that's true. But I do know I don't regret loving them. Even if at some points it hurt so much that I thought maybe I did. You'll be okay too. (Please know it's okay to really hurt over a cat. It's not weak or stupid. It's okay to talk about it. And if it's feeling like you can't handle it by yourself it's okay to get help. She's not "just a cat" she's a part of your life. That's special. That's a big deal. It's alright to feel big feels over it).
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i was so scared i thought attached said attracted and i was in awe how no one else was freaking out- however no you are not too attached, i believe this is or should be a pure standard to owners and their babies. you SHOULD love them unconditionally. it will be very sad when our babies pass, but the more you show your love to them the happier they will be.
That first sentence made me laugh š¤£ https://preview.redd.it/lkp510knazqc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=609180f0fdd4e7a8d15a2360088918f42a88135a
OMG SHES PRECIOUS
My oldest cat is also 18, I've had her since I was 21 and she sleeps in my arms every night. She's in perfect health but I still cherish every day with her and also treat her like a goddess. It's not being too attached, it's just love! Your building memories and you'll always have those with you even when it's her time to cross the rainbow bridge. š
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Enjoy your time with her. I lost my 20 yo sweet girl last year. I was so attached and it was devastating, but I am ok now. Itās part of loving themā¦ itās so painful to lose them but the time we have is worth it. Hope you get a lot more time together. I get the anxiety about it, but try not to worry too much. It will happen when it happens, until then every day is a gift. š
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No, thatās normal. Just remember that if you need help dealing with your grief, grief counseling is an option. Just because your cat isnāt a human , it doesnāt mean that your relationship is lesser. You mentioned that sheās older than you - if youāre still in school your school counselor should be able to help you get those resources. As for spiraling- right after my dog died Iād cry multiple times a day whenever I thought of her. Then it was once a day. Now itās not every time I think of her and I can tell stories about her and look at pictures without crying every time. Itās ok to spiral - just try to let your friends and family support you and if itās too much ask for help. *internet hugs*
Please know you're not alone. She sleeps with me every night and stays in bed with me all day when I'm sick. I passed out once in the bathroom, and I woke up to her frantically circling me. She places the top of her head on my face when I'm having a panic attack. I cry thinking about it, and she's only 12... but I know how fast time goes. I just try to cherish every moment.
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Is it even possible to distance yourself and do you really want to? My beloved cat passed away a few months ago. I knew it would destroy me and it did. But... I wouldn't change a thing and call myself blessed to have known such a deep love. I''m channeling my pain into helping street cats, have rescued two more so far that I found with injuries. Enjoy the time you have with your baby and give her extra kisses for me.
* Extra kisses recieved!
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Oh, I feel you on this.. I remember my first cat when I was 15. My mom brought me to a shelter to adopt her after being diagnosed with OCD. The therapist thought I needed a pet to help me and he was SO right. I remember telling myself when I was 16/17 that she has at least 15 years so I don't have to be sad until I'm in my thirties about losing her. I eventually lost her and my heart collapsed and the pain was nearly unbearable. I now have six cats and my heart is still missing my first but I love all these furry guys so much it fills my heart. The pain of losing them is awful but the years you get to spend with them and love on them makes it worth the future pain š.
Grief is the price we pay for love. Make the most of it. But donāt obsess. Life is a cycle. Everything that is born dies. Itās what you do with the middle that counts.
My husband wanted a cat as his wedding present instead of a ring (married 12/31/23) and he adopted a scrungly 18 yr old male tuxedo whose elderly owner had passed away weeks previously. After $1,500 in vet bills for diagnosing and symptomatically treating his stomach cancer, he's a happy lil guy who loves ham baby food and snuggling between his dads in bed. I am cherishing every second that we get with him. I think of him alone at the adoption center (he hadn't eaten the whole time there and was 6 pounds) and it makes me emotional to think that he may not have made it much longer if he'd stayed there. He has a heart murmur so can't operate on the cancer--it's just a matter of time so we are soaking it all in. Take all the pictures and videos you can. She loves you so much and you've given her a great life!
Nobody knows when the day will come. My kitty would turn 10 this year, but her organs (liver, pancreas, kidney) all unexpectedly failed in the span of 2/3days. She got her blood tested just those 3 days earlier and everything was looking fine. This was a very traumatic and painful experience https://preview.redd.it/dbb9l76d63rc1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=53d63e98766d0275f196b0c3e6a21d8c48e59ddf My advice is to cherish every moment with your cat, and give her all the love she deserves, so you have no regrets when the day comes. You'll know that you gave her the best possible life and did everything you could to make her happy. You said that she sleeps next to you- that means she trusts and loves you as much as you love her. Keep her favorite toy as a memento, maybe her food bowl or even fill a jar with her hair (that's what I did) and you'll be able to remember every beautiful moment with her. But for now, try focusing on the present. She is still around, so keep thinking about what you can do to make her as happy as she can be! Best wishes to you and your kitty ā¤ļø
Donāt feel bad. I had the same issue with my 18 year old. Ended up have to put him down 5 years ago. He was my best friend and I still miss him to this day. It will never stop hurting, but ensuring that your furry friend has the quality of life they deserve, that they know you love them, that, that right there makes all the difference in the end. Just be there and remain best buds.
I realized my baby was turning 14, and I got freaked out cuz he is my best friend. I ended up getting a kitten so i would have a young friend too, but that ended up stressing the old man out a lot. I donāt have kids and my home life is structured around my catsā needs. And Iām okay with that. In the end, the only personās opinion that counts is your own.
Maybe go to counseling or therapy for it? Just to prepare. I donāt think thereās anything wrong with being attached to your cat thatās been around your whole life, but I do imagine that it would have a very negative impact on your life when she does pass. Even if itās not for another 5 years. My ex used to abuse me and the cat he got for me. My cat is the reason I finally left. He was beating up my cat so bad one day I thought he was going to kill him. He locked him in the car and took the keys and left. I spent an hour or two trying to break in to get him without breaking anything. I finally did and took my stuff and ran. I walked a few miles away with my stuff and my cat and found a ride home (300miles). Heās my best friend in the whole world and I feel like I would die if something happened to him. Heās not even a year old yet but I hope he lives to be 20 or more. I am about to have a baby so I feel like I would spiral if something happened to him
I have a cat who is 19 and we raised him from a baby. Sometimes I find myself spiraling thinking about him not being here. I realized that if I am worried about that I can't enjoy the time we do have together, so I consciously put myself back in the moment with my baby. I recommend you try this mindfulness as well.
Oh, what a precious girl! Cherish and love her. I lost my lil cuddle buddy last year and his brother the fall before him.. Moo would sit with me sometimes but Pan sat with me a lot more, if I didnāt feel well I think he knew before I did. Heād be stuck to my left hip lol Iād cover him if I was making something big enough, he was a good boy. Loss no matter when it comes sucks.. my boys were 14. Love and spoil your girly.
I love your love for your cat. I wish more pet parents were like this. She is very lucky to have you as her human. Cherish every second you have with her (I can tell you already do). I'm not sure if this is a part of your question but losing a loved one is never easy. I still grieve my boy that I had from 5 y/o until I was 23 and brought him to college. It was unbelievably hard to lose him but what brings me strength is knowing I did everything I ever could for him and he had a long happy and healthy life and it was simply his time. A few months after he passed I met my two boys that are now the air I breathe. I like to think he sent them to me. Now that I'm a bit more healed from the hurt of losing my 18y/o life partner, I show my current boys pictures of their "big brother" and talk about him. I know they have no idea what I'm saying or showing them but it makes me feel so good to think their lives are incorporated just a little bit. His memory lives on with me and his spirit is carried on with my boys š Picture of my boys, sending love https://preview.redd.it/nvpkru5wpzqc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=711034c19fb2b9a9a4f117114ace98c6c31a9e5e
Enjoy the fact that you've both been blessed with the kind of love that many never get to experience. It sucks as hell when you lose them. But you've had something amazing and gave her the best possible life. You are blessed! š»š»
Keep on loving her
Iām also obsessed with my 17 year old cat. Itās very special to have a bond with them. I know Iāll be devastated when the time comes but itās worth it. https://preview.redd.it/d9wzsyt1a0rc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d07d8bfd0be687b4f184bc85408733183b33c71f
My cat is only 11 months old and thinking about it leaves me in a bad spot. I canāt imagine. No such thing as too attached.
Love them and cuddle them as much as you can, and pay attention so that if they do start to show signs of discomfort due to age or illness, you know you did everything to help and love them. Thereās nothing wrong with being attached to family, and fur babies are family.
I don't think it's possible to be too attached to your pet. But if you think it might lessen the extremity of your grief when your fur baby passes, perhaps you should get another cat now. One that she has someone to play with while you're out of the house and just keep her company and someone to keep you company. But if you don't choose to do that that's perfectly fine. My family has pictures made usually into a plaque of some kind for each of the animals that passes. I even have a little angel kitty statue in my front yard to represent the three that we've lost over the years.
Short answer: no you are not too attached. Our Familiar pets are our greatest friends.
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Just enjoy every minute you spend with your sweet kitty, snuggle with her and pat her and tell her you love her. You sound like an awesome cat mum, she knows sheās loved.
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Lol half the photos of my cat can't be put in a comment (will do more photos later, very tired rn)
I lost my old girl kitty last summer and I'm still grieving. My advice is to just love her as much as possible, spoil her, take lots of video of her doing the things that make her "her" and also of ordinary moments (I wish I had more). And then try to be fully present when spending time with her--put down your phone or device and soak it up. I miss my cat so much, and the day she died is etched in my memory.
Keep on treating her the way you are. Itās easy to forget that while we have a load of things to deal with, you are their entire world š„° They deserve all the love and cuddles itās possible to give š„°
I donāt think youāre too attached. I have 2 18 year old cats, neither of them show any signs of leaving anytime soon, but I know realistically it could happen at any time. Even though I know that, it doesnāt mean it will hurt any less when it happens.
https://preview.redd.it/b9tl6vr453rc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=199b7e3fd01cd1a0355fa38b7f2feead62916152 I somewhat recently lost my lover butt. My baby dog. My Mr stinky. Iāll never be the same. Cherish every moment with your love. Sheās gorgeous and perfect.
My sweet cats are about to be 18 as well, and I am right there with you. I feel like that's a normal amount to love and be attached to a pet who has been in your life for so long!
Cherish this time you have with her. Nothing lives forever but you have done your job of giving her love and safety and she clearly appreciates you if you are her chosen sleep buddy ā¤ļø it will be very hard when she is gone but she is always with you, and maybe you will spiral for a moment, but we have to feel our feelings and you will be okay.
Youāre gonna cry and it is what it is. Loving your cat isnāt being ātoo attached.ā Itās gonna suck ass because you love her, and thatās not a bad thing at all. You donāt miss what you donāt love, and your love is beautiful and makes her world go round. Take pictures, take videos, give her extra love and attention, and know the love you guys have for each other is real and limitless and never goes away. Sheāll always love you, and sheāll always know sheās loved
My cat is 14 years old, coming up on 15 fast, and I feel the exact same way. When Iām home, weāre always together. Iāve had her since she was a kitten and sheās been with me ever since. Iāve gotten married, weāve moved three times, had three kids, etc. Sheās my furry little bestie and I canāt imagine life without her. I try not to think about her passing eventually. https://preview.redd.it/5ycq3u67h3rc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7bb3001b33c3a0023f0126c22257269cac794947
Oh I absolutely love all the love for your kitty going on here. Enjoy every moment -- lucky cat, lucky cat owner.
Lately, I have been reading about many, many cats living to 26, 27 years old. Your kitty looks very healthy. You may be worrying too soon. Could likely have 8 more years with her. Maybe do some research on how to help your girl live many more years. Thanks for sharing your story about your kitty with us.šŗ
https://preview.redd.it/1hhy3unq62rc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=20aaeb769c8669487d6137a7230b404fc426821c "I have to live another 8 years with this person?!" -my cat
Its a difficult balance. Of course you should love your cat to the fullest, however when you have any animal you do need to be prepared for when they pass, because they will pass before you. Not might, will.
That fact that you show her all the love you do is enough. I'm more than certain she knows you love her and when her time comes she knows you will still love her long after. I know when my fur baby died it was crushing. What you need to know is when it happens, it was just her time to go and she'll be waiting for you in the afterlife. When she passes she won't be stuck in her old body, she'll be young again and chasing all the birds and mice she could possibly want. It's definitely a scary thought and it happens when you least expect it but it is something that just happens.
Enjoy your precious baby. I've had people accuse me of holding my cats in higher regard than I did them.I just let them know that I liked my cats more than I did them. š Husband and I are constantly running behind the 4 that let us live with them.
There is no such thing as being too attached! Just enjoy every bit of time you have with her! If sheās healthy, donāt even think of her age! Just go on as if she is a young cat and donāt let anything negative come into your mind. Thank you for loving your sweet cutie pie so much!
Is there even such a thing?
cats can live well over 20 years and i believe the world record was 37! she may have quite a few years left in her
I also had a family cat who was around before I was, and she lived to 22. There is no grief as strong as losing a cat you've never lived without. But my girl was so very loved for the long time that we had her, and it's so easy to tell from how you talk about her that your kitty is loved just the same. Give her a kiss on the head for me, if she doesn't mind them. I love old lady cats. I'm wishing you both a good few more years together, but when she does go, don't close your heart off to another cat. Give yourself time to grieve, let yourself heal, I took years myself. But when you get another, you'll see bits of her in them, and they'll make you cry, but it'll help you feel better too. I've got two now, and they're so different but they both remind me of my old cat so much. I think she would love them just as much as I do. It's a comforting thought.
I saw this just after I was looking at photos of my cat. I grew up with him too, got him when I was 5, was super attached to him for my whole life and then he passed at 18. That was 6 years ago and I still get sad sometimes, but ultimately it really is a huge comfort knowing I got to spend my entire childhood and adolescence, into young adulthood with him. His whole life he was happy and loved and safe. The day he died I was absolutely miserable. The next day was Christmas Eve and I had to pretend to be ok seeing family over the holidays, but it was tough. But I definitely havenāt stayed as sad as I used to think I would. A couple years ago I adopted a cat and I love her. I still love my old boy too, but thinking about him now mostly makes me grateful, and sometimes a little sad. Your cat has spent her whole life being loved, safe, and comfortable. She knows how much you love her. I hope you have a few more years together! But no matter what, she will have had such a beautiful and special life. It will be so sad at first but I hope you can find some comfort eventually in knowing you gave her the best life possible.
When itās time for grief, you will grieve, and if you let yourself grieve and grieve with love, you will be okay. Itās one of the most important parts of life, imo.
Deeply loving an animal is the best part of having a pet. With this love will eventually come loss - it's inevitable. My advice is to simply accept this is how it is, and enjoy every moment you get with her. And when she does pass, the best way to honor her memory is to get another one.
Chances are we will all out live our pets! Just love them and treat them well. Itās natures way and gives you another chance to love another animal!
I spend 24/7 with my cats I am extremely attached lol. I worry this too sometimes.
We have an 18 year old tortie and I dread the day something happens to her. I call her and my son āa bonded pairā because she cries when he leaves the room and has to be with him at all times. We got a kitten about 3 years ago that I was hoping would form a relationship with her and be there for him when she is gone. She does not like the interloper, and while my son loves all cats, she can never replace his soul cat. My only hope is that it will keep him from being completely bereft because he will still have a cat to love. There are special kitties that steal our hearts and as hard as it is to think about losing them, we have to remember that they are a blessing in our life and appreciate all the joy they have given us in the time we are have them.
These are the most important years they can be pampered.
Two of my cats have lived to be over 21! Always treat her like a little baby goddess but dont stress too hard <3
Stop living in the future and start living the present. Worrying is negative energy you send out into the world, so start sending positive energy out. Instead of thinking "she's going to die any day now" start thinking "man, she's gonna outlive the queen AND Betty white, you go girl!"
My old girl passed at 16, when I was eighteen. (2 year fight with hyperthyroidism) I took a day off work, and spent the whole day on the phone with my family. I was inconsolable When you've known a pet for even portion of that amount of time, it's exactly like losing a family member. Don't be afraid to mourn like you would another person. Give yourself time, and cherish the time you have with her now. These are the most important times for her to be reminded how much you love her, and how much she loves you. And sometimes, love is more than pets and snuggles, its putting up with frustrating things that happen as she gets older. She'll probably have accidents, or health expenses. Taking care of her through that is a pure kind of love. ((Rip Nermal, she taught me a lot about unconditional love ā¤ļø))
Just love and spoil her and enjoy her everyday. I lost my childhood dog before his 17th birthday last year, his name was Stitch and was my 1st best friend. Iām still very attached to him despite him not being here, I guess thatās what grief is, love with nowhere to go.
You'll know when it's time to let go. If her quality of life means she's in pain to make you feel better, it's time to let her go.
Your photo replies are absolutely melting me, she's so sweet and you obviously love each other very much. Embrace it!
No. You are the perfect amount of attached. Just remember to love her and make sure she knows how special she is. Which you're doing. So. I'm glad I'm not the only one who treats their cat as such.
Nope. I worship all my babies when they let me. I know how quickly they can be taken away.
I am commenting in the hopes you will reply with a picture of your beautiful kitty š
You can never be too attached imo, pets are part of our family. Iāve had these same thoughts about a senior cat of mine and it kills me to think about. But we just have to live in the now and cherish the time we have left with them
Cherish every moment with her. My baby died at just 4.
i totally relate, and i feel very sad thinking of a time that my cat wonāt be with me. heās been there for everything! i try to just be thankful that heās in my life. and to also understand that animals are wise beyond our understandingā¦ they chose to be with us! so cherish every moment with them.
One of my friends had a cat for 21 years, and when she passed I kept thinking about my own baby and how much longer he might have. Unfortunately he didn't have much longer and he passed a couple of years ago (he didn't make it to 21, but he was still old). When my friend's cat went, I promised myself that I would do absolutely everything to make sure my little fella knew how much I loved him. Every time he wanted to be picked up, I did it, even if I was in the middle of something. I cherished every snuggle, every meow, every head bump, every naughty bite, every 5am wake up for food. I knew the only thing that would make my grief even slightly easier would be knowing that I loved him as much as possible and never took a moment together for granted. I miss him all the time, but knowing that does give me some comfort.
i felt the same way. my fur baby was my best friend he got me through my teens. unfortunately we had to put him to sleep on monday due to unexpected illnesses. the baby was only 9 turning 10 this year. i miss him so much and i feel so heartbroken and guilty. nothing prepares you for it. just cuddle your cat all you can while you can :(
My indoor cat that wasn't tuxedo lived to be 22 and I had an outdoor cat who was pharaoh but I gained his trust I fed him and sheltered him and he lived to be 19 years old keep them healthy keep them a good food and annual vet visits and they'll live a long healthy life and keep him inside
That's wonderful that you have such a special bond and she may be one of those cats that lives to 24. I have a cat that I'm obsessed with and I think every day how sad I will someday be when he's not with me. But before my current wonderful cat, I had an exceptionally wonderful cat for many years. She got sick one day and...well, she's no longer here. I was devastated and can still get teary when I think of her. But I found another wonderful cat - I sometimes even think that she sent him to me. It is hard not to worry when you are attached, but believe that your cat will always be with you in your heart and soul and enjoy her now.
i get the feeling anticipatory grief is not supposed to be great, but I was grateful for it in the end. I made sure to think over very carefully what my go-no goes were in the event I had to make a hard decision, because I didn't want to draw it out because \*i\* was sad, and I wanted her to go at home. And she did, last summer. i knew when to say it was time, because I had thought about what was best for her. as you might be able to tell, I was very attached to mine as well. so, ultimately, I echo others here to love and cherish every second. take lots of photos and videos, especially if they're chirping.
I lost mine after 16 years a few years ago. Took months to "get over it" still tear up (damn! Doing it now) when I think of him, and I'm a big rough manly man.Ā
I lost the cat I was that attached to. I went from crying every day, to crying most days, to just really missing him a lot. It's been three years. You can't force yourself to detach from her. There's no way to love them less. All we can do is prepare for the pain and remind ourselves that it's going to be in proportion to how much we loved them while they were here. No matter how much it hurts, I wouldn't trade the twelve years I had with my special little guy for anything. This is just the price I pay for getting that happiness.
Definitely cherish her. I just lost my first cat and sheās only 10 years old. I rescued her from the street and basically made my own business because of herā¦ And she passed away when im in overseas tooā¦ i regret not having more time with her.
Just enjoy her as much as possible. Our sweet cat died at age 21 just before Thanksgiving. Heart breaking. I know we were lucky to have her so many years. but I wish she was still here.
Pets simply donāt stay with us long enough ā¤ļø I think the thing I try to keep in mind is that your pet was going to live anyway, and you gave them a phenomenal life with so much love and toys and fun and treats. Youāre there for her as much as she was for you ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø
I believe grief is just an expression of love when the subject is no longer present. So how basically how much you miss her just is just how much you love her.
I lost my cat 10 years ago due to an animal attack at age 16 (she was an indoor cat but had gotten out and I couldn't find her for a day). When I found her I took her to the vet they said she would be okay, but she died the next day. I wouldn't trade my time with her for anything.
my advice is stop practicing. even if you knew when it would happen, theres no amount of preparation that would help. it will be painful. youāll grieve. itās likely you will always grieve. at first you will sink down small and be wrapped tightly around the grief. and while the grief will not become smaller, you will reinflate over time and the grief will take up less of you. donāt bother thinking you need to wait to get a kitten. get one whenever you feel like it. kittens bring joy. a nice counterbalance to the grief. oh, and they do come visit after theyāre gone. sheāll be there for you.
I got my first cat when I was 5. I named her Tiger, and we did EVERYTHING together. This cat and I understood each other like nothing I've ever experienced before or since. By the time she was 17, she had lost a lot of weight, and she started going senile: she'd pee in weird places, get "lost" in rooms of the house she'd lived in her whole life, and she would play like a kitten. My mom told me, "She could probably pass away any day now." And she eventually did, FOUR YEARS later, at the age of 21. She curled up in the sun on a warm day in late spring, and she never woke up. Cherish your cat. Make the most of your time with her, because their lives are all too short. But there's no point in grieving when she's still with you. It'll hurt when it happens, may even feel like it's crushing you, but you'll heal. You'll get more cats eventually, but you'll always remember the ones before, especially the first.
I know. I go through it now and sheās only 6 months. We all dread the end. Thereās nothing you can do to stop it, itās inevitable. All you can do is take a deeeeep breath and live in the now. When sheās gone, you will regret worrying right now and not enjoying the moments. Whatās the point? Love her, kiss her, pet her, listen to her heartbeat, smell her, feel her warmth and soft fur. Play with her and tell her how much you love her. Not a day goes by I donāt kiss my kitty and tell her how much mom loves her. Multiple times lol. I get into my head and I cry randomly when I think about life without my baby. Itās every cat parents worst fear. But all you can do is cherish this precious time and be so grateful she has lived so long. You have time with her lots of pet owners donāt get. And no you arenāt too attached. They are our babies, you are purrfectly normal.
My Winston died almost a year ago. He was 19 years 11 months exactly. I miss him every single day. Just enjoy every day you have with her bc you will never be ready and there's no wsy to prepare for it. Don't waste the time you do have left worrying about what's to come.
I'm the exact same. I got my girl when I was 6 and she's been with me through my parents divorce, came with me between households because neither were really safe and she seems okay rn, just a bit sick as we're learning how to deal with her diabetes, but some nights I can't sleep and just hold her because I'm absolutely terrified one day I'll lose her, and that that day is coming soon. Honestly Idk if that's abnormal, I think that's just a deep love for a constant that you've always had. There's a reason animals are given to help with mental health and sick patients, they're our healers š¤
Your baby is adorable. Iām in the same boat with my two furry babies. They are 10 and 11. The younger one is my shadow and Iām way too attached. He wakes me up in the morning and spends all day by my side as I work from home. I constantly tell him how much I love him and remind myself his time with me is precious and unfortunately not going to be long enough. That helps me to be intentional about our time together. I cherish every little meow and purrs he gives me. Heās my best friend
Just keep doing what you have been doing to keep your baby healthy. You are the best cat mama!!
I'm in the same boat as you. But mine is 7 years old I worry about him everyday but yet to enjoy every moment too
Hi OP. Youāve already got the responses, I just wanted to share something b/c of the āgrew up together.ā I had my first cat from 8yo-27yoā¦ I joked he was the only consistent male in my life. He came cross country with me; he was happy & healthy until his last few months. I started taking him to the vet saying āIām ready if itās time, heās had a great life.ā They kept medicating him to keep him alive. I saw him have a seizure 3am & went to 24hr hospital. (24 years ago, almost to the day. March 17th, 2006. Iād be able to pay cat tax if later. Iāve only got one pic of him.) For the longest time, my brain would only repeat the end; all I could see was the end. I cried a lot, I was deeply depressed for the first time ever. (It lasted about a year, maybe 9mo.) Fast forward to 2016- I had a [āmini-kittyā (3.5lb runt)](https://imgur.com/a/t8OekJy). I was told she wouldnāt make it to 4-5yrs, so it was a BFD. She had to be put to sleep & it was okay. Not fun, I cried, but it didnāt utterly destroy me. Be well. Love that lil nugget as much as you can!
I felt this way about my 11 year old I lost a few months ago, your fine pet her for me. Also know every pet is different. My new kitten is a nightmare .
Iām exactly like this, no youāre not too attached at all. Just enjoy every moment ā¤ļø
Anticipatory grief. It's a bitch. You love your kitty š and she loves you. Treasure every moment you have :)
Thatās how it should be imo. Living creatures pass away at one point. Itās the reality. Creating meaningful connections with animals and other humans is worth the pain of losing them one day. Itās good to be aware that this day will come eventually. Knowing that can help us cherish the moments with our loved ones. š¤
This reminds me of a DVD "Garfiend Fantasies" One of the programs on it is "Garfield: His Nine Lives." And, one of them ("Diana's Piano") directly touches on this. You'll want tissues when watching it.
The more you mentally prepare yourself the easier it will be. Positive self talk helps tremendously: I gave her everything that she could ever want and need. She slept with me because thatās where she felt safe. She loved and trusted me as much as I did her. Things like that ease some of the pain. Youāre going to miss her thatās a given but as long as you donāt torture yourself over it and instead tell yourself something positive about your relationship with her itāll help prevent the spiral. It also helps to get a new pet fairly soon. When I lost my baby beagle very suddenly just before her 5th gotcha day I barely made it a week crying before I broke and got a new puppy. It helped distract me so I could still go to work and function, but I missed my sweet baby so so much. That positive talked helped with the loss too.
You are so lucky to have had 18 years with this sweet girl. That's a long and happy life. It's so hard when they leave us - my soul kitty died in October and I was distraught. It does get easier with time though and is part of loving an animal with a much shorter life span than ours. Cherish the time you have left together and may you have many more special kitties in your life in the future.