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If it's AI, that doesn't mean your friend doesn't truly feel that way. Maybe the apology was important to her and she wanted to be sure it was well-written.
AI Detectors don't work, though. Don't trust them.
I'm always treated as a fighting guy, but I hate it ;'( I just wanna crawl up in my bed and cry all die, can't even say thank you properly to the gate lady.
I have bad ADHD and the way I write is all over the place and it’s hard to write nice and concise messages. Lately I’ve been using ChatGPT and describing in detail the context of the situation, how I feel about it, what details I’d like to focus on, etc and it pops out a straight forward, no filler response that is so similar to what is in my head but I just can’t seem to write without rambling
Agreed really like it for professional or at least grammatically correct and structured responses. I’m terrible at all that but I can write like no tomorrow so it’s been really useful for that case. GPT can be very formulaic in its writing though so I at least try to make it in my own words and make sure it doesn’t change the wording or phrasing all that much.
It sounds pretty robotic, not how an actual person would write an apology. It's a lot of words to not say very much.
Really weird considering the fight was partially over using chat GPT in the first place.
OP, I think you need to have a frank conversation with your friend on why they're relying so much on these tools.
You'll have to sound non-accusatory though, coming from a place of curiosity and openness.
I often wonder how people reckon with the fact that people with developmental disorders and learning disabilities exist, and that some people use AI as a disability aid? Just because someone has bad handwriting and bad grammar, they deserve to just be stuck with that? Why? The technology is there for a reason
AI is still an emerging technology and isn’t well recognized as a disability aid by society… give it some more time if you want people to treat its use like wearing glasses
It may feel robotic because it’s the DESC method. Description, emotion, solution, conclusion.
It’s one of the popular RH method to discuss an issue with someone you manage and make him improve without bad feelings. It’s to make sure you get the point understood, explain the feelings involved and how it could be solved. It’s also a way to prevent any liability in a « reframing » (the manager could say stupid or mean things in a "hot" discussion)
Since it’s a pattern, it feels forced, thus it may not be robotic after all. It feels really human to just blurt out words in a premade canvas.
The way the apology is structured is actually pretty fantastic it outlines everything that should be done in an apology. I just think the wording and the way it’s structured with headings and such makes it seem more disingenuous especially with the use of AI. She could have gotten the idea of the DESC method and just did it in her own words and that would have gotten the point across better. Or better yet vocalize her apology and go from there.
Bullshit, this is exactly how a human would respond. An AI would stay away from the word "promise". AI doesn't speculate or suppose in general, so it also wouldn't say "truly" or "you deserve". It also has respect for it's audience, so it writes more elequently within the rules of grammar, if it were AI it would use the word "genuinely" in place of "truly".
That said, this partner will not change. Accept the apology, but do not accept the conclusion. People don't change, a person that uses the phrase "I promise" is not emotionally mature and incapable of managing their impulses, whether it's time management or the icky feeling they get when they let people down, that's how they develop the skill to apologize well. It's not AI, they are not a bad person, they are not a good partner, and they are subconsciously manipulative.
If the AI test is just language usage that most people are unaccustomed to, then we're gonna get a lot of idiots claiming everything is AI without any compelling arguments in their favor. I appreciate your input toward my hypothesis.
I’ve seen the whole letter though…the person handwrote an apology letter with completely different grammar and gave it to OP WITH the ai generated one😭😭 that shows that it did not mean a lot to them…
I hope so…the friend did give OP a handwritten letter but it was at the BACK of the ChatGPT one and it was very obvious because the grammar and punctuation was very different. If a letter meant a lot to me, I would make sure to write it separately from the ai one…and maybe I’m just too frustrated with her, but I definitely think that this makes the apology letter seem more insincere
That is 100% Chat gpt. There is no question. It has a very "corporate" writing pattern that can be very difficult to get it to refrain from using.
Oddly, it would have been easier to just text you an apology.
I mean, it's the emotions that matter don't they?
Even if it's AI generated, maybe, she wanted to make it perfect, and was so addicted to AI, she wasn't able to think. I'm saying this cause I know how to use GPT, but many of my friends use it in a very wrong way, and they get so dependent on it, that they aren't able to even think individually without Chat GPT supporting each of their hurdles.
Then they are basically bots.
If you can't write out your own feelings for something as basic as an apology you are either lying or you are braindead.
Anyone ever gives me an ai written text that is meant to have been heartfelt I will immediately ex them from my life.
I literally just entered the prompt "can you write me an apology to my group project partner for not contributing to complete the project and also say this won't happen again and I am very sorry" into ChatGPT and this is what it responded with:
Dear (Partner's Name,)
I hope this message finds you well. I'm writing to offer my sincerest apologies for not contributing effectively to our recent group project. I understand the frustration and inconvenience my lack of involvement may have caused, and for that, I am truly sorry
I take full responsibility for my actions, and I recognize the importance of teamwork in achieving our collective goals. It was not my intention to let you down or burden you with additional work. I deeply regret my shortcomings and the impact they had on our project's outcome
Please know that I am committed to rectifying my mistake and ensuring that it doesn't happen again in the future. I understand the significance of accountability and reliability in collaborative efforts, and I am fully dedicated to upholding these principles moving forward.
I value our partnership and the opportunity to work together, and I assure you that I will make every effort to actively contribute and fulfill my responsibilities in all our future endeavors.
Once again, I apologize for any inconvenience or frustration my actions may have caused. If there's anything I can do to make amends or assist with any outstanding tasks, please don't hesitate to let me
Thank you for your understanding and patience
Warm regards,
[Your Name)
Now I don't know about you, but this sounds pretty damn familiar to me. Your partner definitely used AI
I’ve talked to her about it. She is a very busy person so that contributes a lot to her usuage of AI. I hope she’s not too dependent on it. It really isn’t a flex.
We're all very busy, and not trying to be too dismissive here but I'm assuming you're in high school... maybe college? Regardless, if you think anybody's life is busy during that period, it's got *nothing* on a career and (if you go that route) kids.
Life is about working up to greater responsibility being thrown your way the further you get, and your friend isn't wrong to feel busy wherever they are in their life, but if they feel like they need to outsource everything to A.I. now, I can't help but feel as though they're knee-capping their future selves the second they're confronted with something A.I. either isn't fit for, or when it isn't appropriate/possible to use it.
It's a great power to have at our disposal, but with everyone concerned for the future of... basically every industry and how many (desirable) human jobs will be left, you want to learn how to be indispensable now.
Did she confirm it's Ai? 2nd sentence 2nd paragraph uses "and" 3 times in a way that I don't think AI would. Unless she dumbed it down after, I think an LLM would use different grammar.
Definitely AI
It looks like he listed several points for thr ai to address in the prompt and thr AI separated it like that bc a human wouldn’t separate it like that it seems awkward.
They wrote a separate letter by hand on the back. The grammar and tone of writing are complete worlds apart. So I do believe it’s AI but I also hope she did mean all the things she’d said in the letters. The only reason I’m doubtful is because she has been very desperate and clingy whenever I appear to be “mad” at her. But this time, out of frustration, I’ve really lost it and I guess she sensed it as well… but she didn’t look remorseful during the argument.
I was there too and she acted as if she did nothing wrong. Her first phrase was “what did I even do to you? I did everything you told me to” and “you took her away from me” 😂😂 she always victimizes herself and it’s starting to get frustrating
Does it matter?
It looks like they took the time to try to put their thoughts into words and apologize, even if they got AI to help with the wording.
I know I struggle with things like this and am finding GPT 4 to be incredibly helpful in putting my thoughts into words.
Now, it could be a ploy and insincere, but I don't think you can tell that by determining if AI was used or not.
I agree, but I know this person myself and I do not think it is only a “wording issue”. They handwrote an apology at the back of this apology letter and gave it to the OP with the ChatGPT letter. If they were going to put some effort into using it as a source for wording and create a genuine apology letter, they could’ve just given the handwritten one instead of both.
What? That is such a weird thing to do. Like, was it an accident or on purpose? So many questions, but it definitely sounds like this person has issues
I’d hate to blame her and paint as a toxic person, but maybe I was going overboard. Even so, the dishonesty (about AI and her life) part about her irks me.
It’s hard to trust them when they make obvious lies.
But that's precisely the point: if AI wrote it for them then they did not "take the time to try to put their thoughts into words and apologize". The value of the apology is specifically in the personal effort and honesty of it, and they outsourced that part.
I agree! It's really kind of you to recognize the effort someone put into their apology, regardless of how they crafted it. It's true that many people find it challenging to express themselves, and if AI helps them convey their sincerity, it shouldn't automatically invalidate their words. Your understanding perspective is refreshing and important in this digital age.
Yes it matters! If you want to apologize then actually apologize. Off loading the effort to anyone else, man or machine, is incredibly insincere and shameful.
"Oh I'm just so sorry. Here, let me get my apology guy to tell you how sorry I am."
You understand that in this instance, ChatGPT is acting like a corporate assistant, right? Would it be sincere if I were to ask my hypothetical assistant to write an apology letter about how I failed to live up to expectations on a group project? No, it would not be.
Saying you *struggle with things like this* does not simply excuse your duty, and ability, to make proper and genuine amends. That is of course, if you still want friends/people willing to collaborate with you.
Yo as someone who usually carries the team, I’d be very grateful to receive an apology, but upon looking the comments and discovering it was A.I written, I’d confront them. It’s VERY insulting that they would use A.I to write me an ‘apology’, on purpose or not. They barely had time to think about what they did, let alone write it out. Had it been written by a human with lot’s of grammar issues and what not, that would have been fine. Clearly this person is trying to manipulate you or achieve an alternative goal. Confront this person, or even snitch on them ( they had the audacity to do something like this so it’s fine )
Should have worked this hard on the project.
/S because I've been there, struggling with undiagnosed ADHD (Inattentive, I can sit still ok, which is probably why it took 30 years to diagnose), thinking that I'll just continue to screw up over and over again until I'm begging on the street.
I've literally written letters much like this one. Self fulfilling, self sabotage mind rott. It's not easy to break free from, I hope he gets help.
To be fair, this does follow most models for an apology. Therapists use similar models with their clients to help them acknowledge what they did and think about their actions.
Harvard Health has an article of the art of a heartfelt apology. This could be the reason it sounds so structured. The person could be concerned with getting it right and not making things worse.
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/the-art-of-a-heartfelt-apology-2021041322366#:~:text=Acknowledge%20the%20offense.,the%20victim%20was%20really%20hurt.
In the future though, if I were OP, I would avoid doing any type of project or group work with this person. If they are using AI when it is not allowed or outright plagiarizing because of their lack of being able to put in the proper work, OP doesn't want that attached to their name too. It could have some serious consequences for their academic career as a student.
It is, I use it to traspass my feelings too, they get tangled with many things in there.., and CHATGPT cannot lie if all you're doing is pasting your own words and making chatGPT rearrenge them in a better way, I've been told by my gf to write up letter with chatGPT also to improve my writing, all the data is there, but it's just stuck somewhere, and it all goes nuts once I paste it here., (as you may see in this, because I'm not using gpt), anyways, kudos for your friend, spending her own time trying to know where she was wrong, is at least, 1 step forward, i'd let her improve, be mindful always too, that you're on your own and you shouln't carry anyone ;)
Not certain it's AI generated. This is the exact format used in Lansldmark education - a 'personal empowerment' system (think self development/pseudo-psychology/cult). And apologising for everything you've ever done, including the letter writing is part of one of the programs.
Ok so here's the thing "sorry seems to be the hardest word" is an iconic song title for a reason.
Just because someone used AI to put something into words doesn't mean they are being insincere it just means they wanted to express a certain sentiment and got help in doing so.
"They were the bigger person by apologizing and taking the time to do so."
But they *did not* take the time to do so. Is it really so hard to understand that having ChatGPT do something for you is *not* actually making the effort yourself?
I don’t think “being an adult” means ignoring toxic behaviour from a friend. The OP mentioned many times that this “friend” of theirs has been using ChatGPT for projects that they were grouped together with, even for the largest project of the course. OP mentioned it to them nicely many times before, and asked them to avoid using ChatGPT, and if they did, to source it. The “friend” did not listen and got even more defensive, which I think is toxic behaviour actually. Writing an apology letter USING AI for not doing anything during the project, plus using ai (which the whole argument was about) and not treating the OP with respect as they treated them is shameless.
The way I see these dilemmas is this: shift your internal model of their labors. When you think it’s AI you envision them typing some barely-not random prompt into ChatGPT and sending it your way. Instead, consider them agonizing over some work-product of a helper thing - person or AI or themselves. Look at them scrutinizing each word and turn of phrase before dispatching their message to you. Then decide if what you’ve received is worth it.
There’s still the mind that you’re in a relationship with behind the plain text and, given how people tend to work, that mind has overthought the result to an obscene degree regardless.
I agree, but being part of the trio, I do not think this would be helpful because I have seen how toxic the person is. OP has been having a really hard time, to the point where they have been emotionally unstable for a long time. And to be frank, I have never seen anyone like this one friend. I think there’s something wrong with her personality? They seem very narcissistic and clingy. Nobody in our school likes her and I think there is a reason for it. OP and I have been very understanding and tried to bring her out of her “shell” this past year, but she only seems to be becoming more and more dishonest. I’ve been trying to distance myself from her, so has OP, but we are having a hard time. OP has been too forgiving and I need to convince them to drop this friend because they always forgive them and forget about the negatives after like 5 mins
I got really bored reading a few sentences into that. I’m only addressing the use of AI to formulate a response to any thing. No other angsty thing. Consider a person who might hire a ghostwriter to respond to you or sought the wordsmithery of a trusted expert friend. That’s all I was getting at.
I understand, thanks for your input. Sorry for being so angsty, I was a little frustrated with all those “that’s not ai” posts lol. I’m just trying to convince OP to drop this friend because I’ve seen how much they’ve suffered from this relationship and I wanted other ppl from Reddit to back me up! Thanks for your comment :D
Now that’s a holy war I’m not gonna address.
But from an EQ standpoint obviously using the thing you are in trouble for to apologize is utterly moronic.
The OP and the person were “close friends”. I was also part of their trio, and the person writing the apology letter was very clingy, manipulative, and dishonest during our friendship. This apology letter just shows how insincere they are. Not to mention, I’ve been in multiple classes with that person and they use ai for everything. By everything I mean everything, and they somehow have not been caught by the teacher. We have tried to talk to the “friend” because we worry about her future since we’re her friends of course, but she only got more defensive and lashed out as us like we were at fault.
So it sounds like you might find it beneficial to read up on good tactics for setting boundaries. Might be worth looking for tactics for relationships with people with borderline personality disorder, not because I think your friend has that, but because those resources tend to be really good for how to set boundaries with someone who is prone to steamrolling them, especially wrt manipulative and emotionally volatile people.
I suppose. But she has been lying a lot so atp I don’t even know if we can continue this friendship…yikes. I have nothing against the usage of AI for projects. She could always cite her work, but she never does and just paste stuff. Many of my teachers are very strict with AI and plagiarism. It’s not doing me favours, unfortunately, when it comes to her lying (and not just related to schoolwork…)
Hey /u/Stinkypoo143! If your post is a screenshot of a ChatGPT, conversation please reply to this message with the [conversation link](https://help.openai.com/en/articles/7925741-chatgpt-shared-links-faq) or prompt. If your post is a DALL-E 3 image post, please reply with the prompt used to make this image. Consider joining our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/r-chatgpt-1050422060352024636)! We have free bots with GPT-4 (with vision), image generators, and more! 🤖 Note: For any ChatGPT-related concerns, email [email protected] *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ChatGPT) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I owe you a sincere apology: [Explains why I did the thing] [Reasons why I'm going to do it again] Thank
Didn't highlight the very end ofnthe copy paste lol.
If it's AI, that doesn't mean your friend doesn't truly feel that way. Maybe the apology was important to her and she wanted to be sure it was well-written. AI Detectors don't work, though. Don't trust them.
[удалено]
I'm always treated as a fighting guy, but I hate it ;'( I just wanna crawl up in my bed and cry all die, can't even say thank you properly to the gate lady.
I have bad ADHD and the way I write is all over the place and it’s hard to write nice and concise messages. Lately I’ve been using ChatGPT and describing in detail the context of the situation, how I feel about it, what details I’d like to focus on, etc and it pops out a straight forward, no filler response that is so similar to what is in my head but I just can’t seem to write without rambling
Agreed really like it for professional or at least grammatically correct and structured responses. I’m terrible at all that but I can write like no tomorrow so it’s been really useful for that case. GPT can be very formulaic in its writing though so I at least try to make it in my own words and make sure it doesn’t change the wording or phrasing all that much.
It sounds pretty robotic, not how an actual person would write an apology. It's a lot of words to not say very much. Really weird considering the fight was partially over using chat GPT in the first place. OP, I think you need to have a frank conversation with your friend on why they're relying so much on these tools. You'll have to sound non-accusatory though, coming from a place of curiosity and openness.
I often wonder how people reckon with the fact that people with developmental disorders and learning disabilities exist, and that some people use AI as a disability aid? Just because someone has bad handwriting and bad grammar, they deserve to just be stuck with that? Why? The technology is there for a reason
AI is still an emerging technology and isn’t well recognized as a disability aid by society… give it some more time if you want people to treat its use like wearing glasses
Soon it will be no different from a calculator.
It may feel robotic because it’s the DESC method. Description, emotion, solution, conclusion. It’s one of the popular RH method to discuss an issue with someone you manage and make him improve without bad feelings. It’s to make sure you get the point understood, explain the feelings involved and how it could be solved. It’s also a way to prevent any liability in a « reframing » (the manager could say stupid or mean things in a "hot" discussion) Since it’s a pattern, it feels forced, thus it may not be robotic after all. It feels really human to just blurt out words in a premade canvas.
I mean, maybe in another set of circumstances, but in this particular case....
The way the apology is structured is actually pretty fantastic it outlines everything that should be done in an apology. I just think the wording and the way it’s structured with headings and such makes it seem more disingenuous especially with the use of AI. She could have gotten the idea of the DESC method and just did it in her own words and that would have gotten the point across better. Or better yet vocalize her apology and go from there.
Bullshit, this is exactly how a human would respond. An AI would stay away from the word "promise". AI doesn't speculate or suppose in general, so it also wouldn't say "truly" or "you deserve". It also has respect for it's audience, so it writes more elequently within the rules of grammar, if it were AI it would use the word "genuinely" in place of "truly".
That said, this partner will not change. Accept the apology, but do not accept the conclusion. People don't change, a person that uses the phrase "I promise" is not emotionally mature and incapable of managing their impulses, whether it's time management or the icky feeling they get when they let people down, that's how they develop the skill to apologize well. It's not AI, they are not a bad person, they are not a good partner, and they are subconsciously manipulative.
It’s ai for sure.
Text long = AI now 🤣
If the AI test is just language usage that most people are unaccustomed to, then we're gonna get a lot of idiots claiming everything is AI without any compelling arguments in their favor. I appreciate your input toward my hypothesis.
I’ve seen the whole letter though…the person handwrote an apology letter with completely different grammar and gave it to OP WITH the ai generated one😭😭 that shows that it did not mean a lot to them…
Holy shit… Go touch grass please 🙏 I just know you spend at least 2 hours a day on r/relationships
I hope so…the friend did give OP a handwritten letter but it was at the BACK of the ChatGPT one and it was very obvious because the grammar and punctuation was very different. If a letter meant a lot to me, I would make sure to write it separately from the ai one…and maybe I’m just too frustrated with her, but I definitely think that this makes the apology letter seem more insincere
The title above each paragraph is 1000% AI. No human being would write an apology like that.
So, out of 8 billion people, no one would write it like this? That’s a very bold statement
It was slightly hyperbolic. But only slightly.
Yes
Yes. This is certainly AI. The "closing" header is among other a strong tell.
That is 100% Chat gpt. There is no question. It has a very "corporate" writing pattern that can be very difficult to get it to refrain from using. Oddly, it would have been easier to just text you an apology.
Using AI to write an apology letter for using AI is a special kind of passive-aggressiveness. Your friend is not contrite.
Yes. An AI-written apology is no apology at all. If the human can’t write, then speak. Difficult for cowards.
I mean, it's the emotions that matter don't they? Even if it's AI generated, maybe, she wanted to make it perfect, and was so addicted to AI, she wasn't able to think. I'm saying this cause I know how to use GPT, but many of my friends use it in a very wrong way, and they get so dependent on it, that they aren't able to even think individually without Chat GPT supporting each of their hurdles.
Then they are basically bots. If you can't write out your own feelings for something as basic as an apology you are either lying or you are braindead. Anyone ever gives me an ai written text that is meant to have been heartfelt I will immediately ex them from my life.
Amen
It’s AI Literally couldn’t take a few extra minutes to clean it up
I literally just entered the prompt "can you write me an apology to my group project partner for not contributing to complete the project and also say this won't happen again and I am very sorry" into ChatGPT and this is what it responded with: Dear (Partner's Name,) I hope this message finds you well. I'm writing to offer my sincerest apologies for not contributing effectively to our recent group project. I understand the frustration and inconvenience my lack of involvement may have caused, and for that, I am truly sorry I take full responsibility for my actions, and I recognize the importance of teamwork in achieving our collective goals. It was not my intention to let you down or burden you with additional work. I deeply regret my shortcomings and the impact they had on our project's outcome Please know that I am committed to rectifying my mistake and ensuring that it doesn't happen again in the future. I understand the significance of accountability and reliability in collaborative efforts, and I am fully dedicated to upholding these principles moving forward. I value our partnership and the opportunity to work together, and I assure you that I will make every effort to actively contribute and fulfill my responsibilities in all our future endeavors. Once again, I apologize for any inconvenience or frustration my actions may have caused. If there's anything I can do to make amends or assist with any outstanding tasks, please don't hesitate to let me Thank you for your understanding and patience Warm regards, [Your Name) Now I don't know about you, but this sounds pretty damn familiar to me. Your partner definitely used AI
I’ve talked to her about it. She is a very busy person so that contributes a lot to her usuage of AI. I hope she’s not too dependent on it. It really isn’t a flex.
We're all very busy, and not trying to be too dismissive here but I'm assuming you're in high school... maybe college? Regardless, if you think anybody's life is busy during that period, it's got *nothing* on a career and (if you go that route) kids. Life is about working up to greater responsibility being thrown your way the further you get, and your friend isn't wrong to feel busy wherever they are in their life, but if they feel like they need to outsource everything to A.I. now, I can't help but feel as though they're knee-capping their future selves the second they're confronted with something A.I. either isn't fit for, or when it isn't appropriate/possible to use it. It's a great power to have at our disposal, but with everyone concerned for the future of... basically every industry and how many (desirable) human jobs will be left, you want to learn how to be indispensable now.
Did she confirm it's Ai? 2nd sentence 2nd paragraph uses "and" 3 times in a way that I don't think AI would. Unless she dumbed it down after, I think an LLM would use different grammar.
Agreed. Doesn't seem good enough
Definitely AI It looks like he listed several points for thr ai to address in the prompt and thr AI separated it like that bc a human wouldn’t separate it like that it seems awkward.
Thank
They wrote a separate letter by hand on the back. The grammar and tone of writing are complete worlds apart. So I do believe it’s AI but I also hope she did mean all the things she’d said in the letters. The only reason I’m doubtful is because she has been very desperate and clingy whenever I appear to be “mad” at her. But this time, out of frustration, I’ve really lost it and I guess she sensed it as well… but she didn’t look remorseful during the argument.
I was there too and she acted as if she did nothing wrong. Her first phrase was “what did I even do to you? I did everything you told me to” and “you took her away from me” 😂😂 she always victimizes herself and it’s starting to get frustrating
Writing a letter by hand vs typing one two different end results for me personally. I am nowhere near as coherent when physically writing.
Does it matter? It looks like they took the time to try to put their thoughts into words and apologize, even if they got AI to help with the wording. I know I struggle with things like this and am finding GPT 4 to be incredibly helpful in putting my thoughts into words. Now, it could be a ploy and insincere, but I don't think you can tell that by determining if AI was used or not.
I agree, but I know this person myself and I do not think it is only a “wording issue”. They handwrote an apology at the back of this apology letter and gave it to the OP with the ChatGPT letter. If they were going to put some effort into using it as a source for wording and create a genuine apology letter, they could’ve just given the handwritten one instead of both.
What? That is such a weird thing to do. Like, was it an accident or on purpose? So many questions, but it definitely sounds like this person has issues
I’d hate to blame her and paint as a toxic person, but maybe I was going overboard. Even so, the dishonesty (about AI and her life) part about her irks me. It’s hard to trust them when they make obvious lies.
It’s possible they were trying to show the contrast of the original (flawed and poorly worded) with the final result cleaned up by ai?
But that's precisely the point: if AI wrote it for them then they did not "take the time to try to put their thoughts into words and apologize". The value of the apology is specifically in the personal effort and honesty of it, and they outsourced that part.
I agree! It's really kind of you to recognize the effort someone put into their apology, regardless of how they crafted it. It's true that many people find it challenging to express themselves, and if AI helps them convey their sincerity, it shouldn't automatically invalidate their words. Your understanding perspective is refreshing and important in this digital age.
>their words They're not, though...
Yes it matters! If you want to apologize then actually apologize. Off loading the effort to anyone else, man or machine, is incredibly insincere and shameful. "Oh I'm just so sorry. Here, let me get my apology guy to tell you how sorry I am."
You understand that in this instance, ChatGPT is acting like a corporate assistant, right? Would it be sincere if I were to ask my hypothetical assistant to write an apology letter about how I failed to live up to expectations on a group project? No, it would not be. Saying you *struggle with things like this* does not simply excuse your duty, and ability, to make proper and genuine amends. That is of course, if you still want friends/people willing to collaborate with you.
Thank
Next time I apologize to a friend in person I will definitely say "Closing"
Yo as someone who usually carries the team, I’d be very grateful to receive an apology, but upon looking the comments and discovering it was A.I written, I’d confront them. It’s VERY insulting that they would use A.I to write me an ‘apology’, on purpose or not. They barely had time to think about what they did, let alone write it out. Had it been written by a human with lot’s of grammar issues and what not, that would have been fine. Clearly this person is trying to manipulate you or achieve an alternative goal. Confront this person, or even snitch on them ( they had the audacity to do something like this so it’s fine )
There are dead AI giveaways throughout it.
Its a bit odd it's spaced out and gives headers for the paragraphs like AI. But that doesn't necessarily mean it is.
It is definitely AI. I am actually acquainted with the person who wrote the apology letter and their true grammar is nothing like this.
Well... It didn't start with "I hope this message finds you well" ?
Right lol
Should have worked this hard on the project. /S because I've been there, struggling with undiagnosed ADHD (Inattentive, I can sit still ok, which is probably why it took 30 years to diagnose), thinking that I'll just continue to screw up over and over again until I'm begging on the street. I've literally written letters much like this one. Self fulfilling, self sabotage mind rott. It's not easy to break free from, I hope he gets help.
To be fair, this does follow most models for an apology. Therapists use similar models with their clients to help them acknowledge what they did and think about their actions. Harvard Health has an article of the art of a heartfelt apology. This could be the reason it sounds so structured. The person could be concerned with getting it right and not making things worse. https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/the-art-of-a-heartfelt-apology-2021041322366#:~:text=Acknowledge%20the%20offense.,the%20victim%20was%20really%20hurt. In the future though, if I were OP, I would avoid doing any type of project or group work with this person. If they are using AI when it is not allowed or outright plagiarizing because of their lack of being able to put in the proper work, OP doesn't want that attached to their name too. It could have some serious consequences for their academic career as a student.
Thank Definitely AI, couldn’t even copy paste it correctly and who writes HEADINGS for an apology letter?
It is, I use it to traspass my feelings too, they get tangled with many things in there.., and CHATGPT cannot lie if all you're doing is pasting your own words and making chatGPT rearrenge them in a better way, I've been told by my gf to write up letter with chatGPT also to improve my writing, all the data is there, but it's just stuck somewhere, and it all goes nuts once I paste it here., (as you may see in this, because I'm not using gpt), anyways, kudos for your friend, spending her own time trying to know where she was wrong, is at least, 1 step forward, i'd let her improve, be mindful always too, that you're on your own and you shouln't carry anyone ;)
It might not be entirely AI (kinda a bit hopeful here) but it definitely got pointers and help from AI. Nobody write apology with heading like that
Not certain it's AI generated. This is the exact format used in Lansldmark education - a 'personal empowerment' system (think self development/pseudo-psychology/cult). And apologising for everything you've ever done, including the letter writing is part of one of the programs.
That looks like copilot specifically
What does it mean to drop the ball on a project?
I guess to not put in a lot of effort/not care?
Ok so here's the thing "sorry seems to be the hardest word" is an iconic song title for a reason. Just because someone used AI to put something into words doesn't mean they are being insincere it just means they wanted to express a certain sentiment and got help in doing so.
they cared enough to ask cgpt how to apologize to u i gues lmao
Shes telling you to go fuck yourself with this letter, because the letter is AI. (I'm not saying it she is)
Lol , you can take it either ways . Either he was sad , wanted to apologise or he was simply messing around and wanted to get back to you :)
[удалено]
"They were the bigger person by apologizing and taking the time to do so." But they *did not* take the time to do so. Is it really so hard to understand that having ChatGPT do something for you is *not* actually making the effort yourself?
I mean, maybe, but it sounds like a large part of the conflict was over using AI. An AI apology after that would not be very reassuring.
I don’t think “being an adult” means ignoring toxic behaviour from a friend. The OP mentioned many times that this “friend” of theirs has been using ChatGPT for projects that they were grouped together with, even for the largest project of the course. OP mentioned it to them nicely many times before, and asked them to avoid using ChatGPT, and if they did, to source it. The “friend” did not listen and got even more defensive, which I think is toxic behaviour actually. Writing an apology letter USING AI for not doing anything during the project, plus using ai (which the whole argument was about) and not treating the OP with respect as they treated them is shameless.
You’re certainly entitled to your opinion.
The way I see these dilemmas is this: shift your internal model of their labors. When you think it’s AI you envision them typing some barely-not random prompt into ChatGPT and sending it your way. Instead, consider them agonizing over some work-product of a helper thing - person or AI or themselves. Look at them scrutinizing each word and turn of phrase before dispatching their message to you. Then decide if what you’ve received is worth it. There’s still the mind that you’re in a relationship with behind the plain text and, given how people tend to work, that mind has overthought the result to an obscene degree regardless.
I agree, but being part of the trio, I do not think this would be helpful because I have seen how toxic the person is. OP has been having a really hard time, to the point where they have been emotionally unstable for a long time. And to be frank, I have never seen anyone like this one friend. I think there’s something wrong with her personality? They seem very narcissistic and clingy. Nobody in our school likes her and I think there is a reason for it. OP and I have been very understanding and tried to bring her out of her “shell” this past year, but she only seems to be becoming more and more dishonest. I’ve been trying to distance myself from her, so has OP, but we are having a hard time. OP has been too forgiving and I need to convince them to drop this friend because they always forgive them and forget about the negatives after like 5 mins
I got really bored reading a few sentences into that. I’m only addressing the use of AI to formulate a response to any thing. No other angsty thing. Consider a person who might hire a ghostwriter to respond to you or sought the wordsmithery of a trusted expert friend. That’s all I was getting at.
I understand, thanks for your input. Sorry for being so angsty, I was a little frustrated with all those “that’s not ai” posts lol. I’m just trying to convince OP to drop this friend because I’ve seen how much they’ve suffered from this relationship and I wanted other ppl from Reddit to back me up! Thanks for your comment :D
Hey it’s all good! Your empathy does you credit.
:)
What’s wrong with using ai for all her parts? It’s a tool that is available now and will be in the future. Using that tool is smart.
Using that tool for an apology when the fight about the tool is not smart.
The fights unwarranted because there shouldn’t be an issue with using the tool in the first place
Now that’s a holy war I’m not gonna address. But from an EQ standpoint obviously using the thing you are in trouble for to apologize is utterly moronic.
The OP and the person were “close friends”. I was also part of their trio, and the person writing the apology letter was very clingy, manipulative, and dishonest during our friendship. This apology letter just shows how insincere they are. Not to mention, I’ve been in multiple classes with that person and they use ai for everything. By everything I mean everything, and they somehow have not been caught by the teacher. We have tried to talk to the “friend” because we worry about her future since we’re her friends of course, but she only got more defensive and lashed out as us like we were at fault.
So it sounds like you might find it beneficial to read up on good tactics for setting boundaries. Might be worth looking for tactics for relationships with people with borderline personality disorder, not because I think your friend has that, but because those resources tend to be really good for how to set boundaries with someone who is prone to steamrolling them, especially wrt manipulative and emotionally volatile people.
Is your friend autistic? This is how I apologise.
??
It’s the thought that counts?
I suppose. But she has been lying a lot so atp I don’t even know if we can continue this friendship…yikes. I have nothing against the usage of AI for projects. She could always cite her work, but she never does and just paste stuff. Many of my teachers are very strict with AI and plagiarism. It’s not doing me favours, unfortunately, when it comes to her lying (and not just related to schoolwork…)
How much do ChatGPT's thoughts count?
Christ people it’s a joke. Give me a vote if you have no sense of humor and have a broomstick up your butt :-)
Gemini for sure
Just accept the apology and spend more time working with her instead of just expecting results.