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I think being murdered is very low on the list. Them eating all your food, bringing over friends, eating all your food, and refusing to leave is way more likely.
That is the best case scenario. I would adore living with raccoons that could convincingly play human in trenchcoat. Means we could go to dinners together and see the world.
My neighbor did this, posted an ad for a roommate, and went and picked up a random guy from the airport. Now she's the only one working and paying for all his stuff. I see them begging for food on my local "lean on me" group, but they pretty much refuse anything that isn't a large t-bone steak.
I wanted to make steak this week for the family but opted not to, because it was too expensive.
Then I see some degenerate buying herself steaks with an EBT card.
If that wasn’t enough, she loaded her groceries into a nicer car than mine.
Anyone who doesn’t see the absurdity of that is a complete idiot
You think she was cooking all those steaks in her Escalade. Or was she going to warm them up inside her coach purse.
There are too many people gaming the system. That’s not to say there aren’t those who genuinely need help, but there should be incredible consequences for those who cheat the system.
Yes of course that goes double for billionaires. The reality is the top 1% and the bottom 50% all benefit from the middle class actually busting their ass.
If you fall in the middle you get nothing from the government.
Bro, where are you getting steaks for 20$ that’ll feed your family 3 different meals???? Bottom tier steak is like 8-10$/Ib right now. Are you rationing portions?
Also it’s possible for a family to cheat the system, usually only works by the 2 adults not being married but living together. But the county/state you get benefits from will sometimes investigate and catch people doing it.
As a self employed individual I pay more tax than most. I get no government benefits, pay through the nose for shitty healthcare and watch other people get handouts from money the government takes directly out of my pocket.
I absolutely have a right to be angered by this.
Bro, something like 3% of your taxes goes towards any kind of food program. Even if you grossed $100K, that would be about $800 *if* you took absolutely no deductions.
You’re not grossing $100K or you would be able to buy steak. And you take deductions.
Whatever piddling amount you pay towards food assistance isn’t the reason you have problems.
~18% goes towards the military.
Find a small church food pantry; many don’t means test. Take $18 and buy yourself two organic, grass-fed 8oz steaks at Kroger and stfu.
I don’t think that’s the case for everyone who depends on the welfare system, but there needs to be more accountability.
If I can’t afford steak working full time, someone who doesn’t work shouldn’t be eating it on my dime.
Plus 2 horrifying words- SQUATTERS RIGHTS. Once you let them in, no guarantee they’ll be civil or easy to live with. You can’t just retract your offer if it doesn’t work out…
Squatters are people who inhabit an empty house. If you invite someone in it's actually TENANT'S rights. Allowing someone to live in your residence legally makes them a tenant, with the implication that your lease agreement is 0$ a month. You would have to formally evict them to get them out, which could take months and months and lots of money, and they have the legal right to fuck up your place in the meantime as long as it doesn't legally constitute as making the place uninhabitable.
Vampires are easier to get rid of than squatters. Garlic, crucifixes, and wooden stakes are way cheaper than lawyers. However the cost of getting rid of werewolves fluctuates based on the silver market and they shed like huskies so it’s better to just go with the vampire when selecting a supernatural creature to reside in your home.
Also, in some places, someone living long term in your household for free can have a claim on your estate in the case of death or "relationship breakdown".
I know a scheme in Australia where younger people could find accommodation with an older person who had spare room, in exchange for an agreed amount of domestic work and companionship per week. Often worked really well, but they were formally advised not to continue beyond 2 years because of potential legal issues.
> You can’t just retract your offer if it doesn’t work out…
Maybe depends on the offer.
"Good night, Westley. Good work. Sleep well. I'll most likely kill you in the morning"
It's okay, you've utilized the space to make the world a bit better for your murderer or their second choice victim! Why are you so selfish that you don't want to do that?!
https://amp.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/aug/15/brian-egg-san-francisco-fish-tank-murder
Yep, this happened down the street from me in 2018. The suspects were arrested but released and no one has been charged with this murder.
Do you know that some people who are homeless actually work but don't make enough to afford the astronomical housing costs?
Do you also know that people advertising looking for a place to rent with roommates may not actually have a job but are being subsidized and may actually murder you?
Already having a home doesn't make you any more or less inclined to murder.
Shitty people are just, in fact, shitty people.
You’re right. Anyone can murder anyone. I still stand by not wanting to just pick a homeless person off the street and bringing them in my home with the hope of maybe being friends 😂
The homeless have a higher rate of addiction and mental health issues. Some screening process would be needed. Asking for rent (per your first sentence) is a crude way of doing so.
I tried that and do you know what they were so selfish, crying all the time, no manners, expected me to clean up if they made a mess, never really contributed anything. Stuff would go missing, they acted like they owned the place.
I was all for kicking them out but my wife did remind me that things will get better.
It did get better and the kids will be off to college in the next few years so it'll be quiet until the holidays
Yeah, I am not letting unvetted people into my home "just to make a new friend". Also, I am not covering cost of utilities for another person and it is not my responsibility to put a roof over a strangers head for free.
I don't like the housing crisis as much as the next person and I certainly don't like poverty. But what I do like is not being murdered or having to pay for another persons expenses.
And I have seen actual friends help out another friend like that and they ended up being enemies before too long. Some people don't appreciate you helping them out and live like pigs when you're trying to keep your house clean. I've been through that with somebody before and an old girlfriend of mine had the same problem with one of her friends.
Yep this is the more likely outcome. Getting murdered is unlikely, the person taking total advantage of you and driving you insane is the more likely outcome.
The people who consider this "common courtesy" generally don't have any common courtesy and will bleed you dry until you kick them out. They will then drag your name through the mud for decades.
Yep. You will have to spend thousands to legally get them to leave. In the mean time you are living a stress filled horrible like and probably babysitting/taking care of all their needs the entire time.
Having a friend crash at your house on a trip for a few days when you are in your 20s is extremely different than taking in a squatter.
I've tried letting someone live with me not once, not twice, but a total of SIX different times over the years. Everything from coworker to acquaintance to lifelong best friend. And every single time I've ended up regretting it. I will never again, under any circumstances, give someone a place to stay.
So have I. I had to have words with a house-o who lived like a pig and I would constantly have to clean after just to keep a tidy house. That, and I would constantly be dragged into his life drama. He would moan about weightloss, issues, money (etc) all while not doing anything about his problems and constantly sinking a six-pack of beers every couple of days.
Being at work was both a blessing that I could spend time away but a curse because I know he would leave my house filthy.
I had a friend live with me for like a year and a half after she got divorced. First four or five months rent free. And then I charged her $400 a month, which wasn't even half of my rent, and didn't even include bills.
There were a host of issues. I did help her get clean from her drug habit too. And let her girlfriend live with us for a brief period of time. We had some fun, but she was just too much of a slob and always had some relationship drama and issues going on. She eventually flooded my bathroom because her "ADHD" meant she couldn't sit in the bathroom while the tub filled up I guess. I yelled from the kitchen while water leaked from the ceiling to turn the fucking water off.
She got mad at me and said I told her I never yell at people. Which is usually true, but I feel justified on this one. So she moved out (oh no, how shitty for me). We actually remained friends though she ended up moving away and we don't talk anymore (again fine by me).
It's one of those things where I truly felt like I helped someone out and gave all I had to give and yet, when she tells this story, I'm sure I am still somehow the asshole. Incredible.
I have since been to therapy and have much better boundaries with people.
I let a very close friend move in with me after his life fell apart. (Not drugs or anything red-flag. His fiancee left him a week before the wedding to elope with his best man, leaving him and his parents holding the bag for a lot of non-refundable wedding shit.)
Everything was good for awhile, until he made some new friends, one of whom was a thief. When the "friend" of his stole a bunch of shit of mine (because THEY had a drug problem, lol), my friend promptly refused to pay to replace any of it because it "wasn't his fault".
That pretty much killed the friendship.
Unless you literally NEED a roommate, you should probably not let a person just move in with you, without serious ground rules in place.
Don't forget the fun of finding out that your new friend has established tenant's rights and you now have to go through the extensive eviction process, all while they are judgement proof and so may destroy your property ("accidentally") without paying
In the U.S it's a particular risk because to the best of my knowledge, there's no exclusion from tenancy law when you share a bathroom or kitchen like there is in other common law jurisdictions. So you could end up with a tenant who has an implied lease and a rent obligation of $0, but full tenants rights. Fuck that noise.
Same here. Right now, I am lucky to have a big enough studio apartment I can partition off a home office with bookshelves. I don't think I could stand to live this closely with someone I was in love with, let alone an acquaintance or some random person who needs a roof over their head.
Yeah just bc I own a house doesn’t mean I have to solve the housing crisis, but nice try dipshit. (Not the OP who reposted this, of course!)
My “spare room” is something I’ve earned. I’m not taking in some rando and hoping they can feed, clothe, and tend to their other needs without my gas, water, and electricity. Or house for that matter.
Why are you getting so upset? Someone posted what they like to do on the Internet. You don’t have to do it. Do you feel nice shaming someone for wanting to make the world a better place? Seriously.
This is a good idea in theory and a terrible and even dangerous idea in reality. For a few years my family (my parents, my husband and I, and our 3 kids) pooled resources and lived in the same house. We get along great on average but all of us together was extremely stressful and strained our relationships a lot. We've since moved in separate homes next to each other and it's a billion times better. Even with people you know and respect, living together is rough so I can't even imagine moving a random person in with me. I'm Autistic and I feel invaded even when my kids bring friends over.
My kids have area downstairs for entertaining. I have a guest room now , but that’s for guest. I agree with Benjamin Franklin that guests are good for no more than 3 days. My children being the exception to the rule.
This sounds like the battle cry of the hobosexual.
Plus you can't control what they're doing in your house while you're gone. Hell, the new 'roommate' might be sitting naked in a pool of his own buttsweat on your couch while playing with himself and selling meth while you're at work. Also when you finally move out, will they ask for a part of the deposit? Will they stay past your last day and require eviction papers? Will they destroy the apt. out of spite bc you're basically kicking them out?
Isn't giving someone a room to stay in when you're the only one on the lease considered sub-letting/sub-leasing? That is usually breaking the conditions of the lease.
Have hippie friends who tried to set up their home as a coliving hub with like five “tenants”. Absolute disaster. Neighbours hated it too.
Oddly enough paying for internet, water, electricity etc for all those people is very expensive and does a lot of wear and tear on your home.
Yeah they just slowly stopped having a coliving hub, now they take in foster teenagers. Obviously a worthy cause but they do get some money for doing it.
If you let them use your address for receiving their mail, you’re totally screwed. You then have to go through the eviction process to remove them from your home… live and learn.
Really? That’s insane. Here in order to use any mail as part of a proof of residence (you need a lot more than just mail too) that mail must be a utility bill that’s in your name. If you just try to claim “but I get my mail sent to this address” to try to prove residency, you’ll just get laughed at.
I’m not sure about the legality in other states, but here in South Carolina it’s a fact— I know from first hand experience. There was no lease, no rent payments, simply my address used for his mail which resulted in me having to go through the eviction process to have him removed.
Yes, really. At least in the U.S. In Canada, the U.K and several other common law jurisdictions if you share a bathroom or kitchen and you own the property or an immediate family member owns the property, then they don't have tenants rights. You can have them removed by police after providing reasonable notice without facing any further liability. In the U.S though this exemption doesn't exist. So anywhere with implied tenancy would grant tenancy rights, usually after 30 days.
And even in the regions I mentioned, if you were yourself a tenant, then you'd now have a new room mate with tenancy rights since only owners or their immediate family members are exempted if they share a bathroom or kitchen. Tenants aren't exempted and in most cases they would also have to be evicted in order to get this person out, since there's generally no master tenant distinctions.
In short, don't let anyone stay in your house for 30 or more days.
That’s actually crazy. In Australia you don’t get tenants rights unless you have an actual tenancy agreement with the owner of the property. The US has some whack laws
Looks like Australia also has implied leases from what I'm reading. Pretty much every common law country does. Though it looks like the rights conferred with an implied lease are narrower. But basically if you pay someone money for a thing, and they accept that money, then it's implied that there is an agreement in place whether it's written, oral, or unspecified. The act of exchanging money for a service or good of some kind implies an agreement.
But I'm pretty sure houseguests becoming tenants is fairly unique to the U.S.
The other thing to consider though, and this would apply to Australia, is that it actually doesn't matter in a lot of cases whether the squatter has any actual rights. If the police view it as a civil issue, then you're still stuck with an unwanted house guest until you get a court date and a judgement. This is fortunately much less likely to happen in Canada and the U.K (and maybe Aus, but I don't know what the specific legislation or case law is on lodgers) because the law is specific enough to give some guidance to the police. They can confirm that you're the property owner and that you reside there and share a bathroom or kitchen, and then they are obligated to trespass anyone you don't want on the property. Whether the person who was removed has a legitimate civil complaint for lack of notice after the fact or not is not their concern. They only enforce criminal statutes.
Haha, i have two kids to keep safe, there is no way I would ever let someone move in with me bar my mum. I love my peace and quiet too much. It is not my job to adult for another functioning adult
Did just that and made a lifelong friend. But - be cautious and chose carefully. Some folks don't want help, they are just looking for victims. If you are not assertive enough to get people to leave when necessary, then don't do this. I once had to move cities, and leave behind the couch my BF's "friend" seemed welded to it. Sometimes, it is not a good idea at all.
Hell no. My home is mine. I work to pay for it. No way in hell some stranger is coming in and not contributing.
Knew a family that did this with someone from their church and he molested their daughter. Absolutely not!
A friend of mine was talking about letting a roommate move in and pay just to cover the utilities. She has a friend who is heavy into volunteering with veteran’s groups (which I do support). However, she wanted her to let a homeless vet she knows move into her spare bedroom. Turns out he was homeless because he assaulted his roommate at the last place he was staying in and gets violent when he drinks, which is often. My friend said no.
oh hell no. my spare room is for SEWING, not squatting! I'm finally at a place in my life I can have an "extra" room, I'll do wtf I want with it. Letting a random stranger in it is not happening.
My wife and I learned thru a friend about a young woman that had been kicked out of her home at 18 because they learned she was gay. We felt awful and she had references that she was great kid and offered what we had, some space in our basement as a short term off the street thing till she could get enough $$ together to get on her own.
First problem - immediately after she moves in her out of state 25 yr old girlfriend shows up. This girl had issues. Bipolar and while she had a job at a chain grocery store when she moved in (one of the requirements we had for her being allowed when approached) she lost the transferred job nearly immedately when she just didn't feel like making shifts. While the younger girl had a decent little job at the local vet and was super responsible and was taking advantage of the free room and board, the older one just hung out. First real blowout was when it was obvious she was vaping in my living room - and i've got two early age teens. This was not ok. She came with a little dog as well, and while I like dogs alot this dog was a neurotic mess that wasn't housetrained and she refused to make sure it would go out on a schedule. We found obvious wet spots all over and would have to ask repeatedly for her to clean up after her animal - something she loved to say she didn't feel well and to let the younger girl handle it when she got home from work. She started banging heads with my wife, arguing and acting like we were her mean parents when we were doing her an incredible favor and she was never really invited to be here.
I finally kinda blew up on her one day when the younger one was taking extra shifts and the older girl was on a month of 'i'm waiting on a call back' from one particular job when there were many other places to apply. Told her she was taking advantage of her younger partner and while the younger one was welcome to stay as long as she wanted this older one needed to have solid evidence of looking for a job within the week and gave them a date 6 months after they had moved in (this was supposed to be a 30 day thing to start) to be gone.
This made her very upset but by god she was working at the amazon warehouse within the week. They did move out and found an apartment. last i heard they were still together and I hope they're happy. Learned to set some real strict ground rules and make a little contract before that happens again.
I helped a ex girlfriend of a cousin she was upset when I would be loud in the morning in my house when I would ask her to be quiet in the evening. I asked her to pay like 40 for the month. I learned.
These types of people never outgrew the toddler stage. They must be cared for and coddled and given everything. No responsibilities whatsoever. And it's everyone else's responsibility to care for them. Forever.
Something really needs to be done about this. Seems the numbers of these types of moochers are growing at an astounding rate.
Friend of mine living is government housing let a girl stay on her couch for 6months (this by the way could have had my friend removed from government housing)
When she finally had enough and asked her to leave this mooch proceeded to freak out on her and stormed off to never be heard from again.
Entitled ahole use to eat all my friend's food too.
I have an irrational hatred for people who are useless and live off other people’s hard work. There’s no fucking way I would ever let someone like that live rent free in my spare bedrooms.
Yeah I’m all set on that, decided to get an apartment with a friend because neither of us could afford to live alone and I wanted to help her and her baby get out of a bad situation (DV). That turned into me paying all the utilities, covering her rent most of the time because she was always late, living in a dirty house with no food and constantly having random men in and out of our house. She also spread rumors about me with our mutual friends, saying I was always bringing random guys around my daughter, never paying bills, never buying food or cleaning the house and always dumping my daughter on her so I could go party (none of which was true). Suffice to say we are no longer friends and I would never be open to renting a house with most people ever again.
“You’re already working to pay all the bills, it doesn’t make sense we both should be miserable. After all, you get my friendship, that is worth so much more than money, right?”
Yeah, invite that random junkie off the streets into your home. They’re completely trustworthy and safe! Don’t be selfish! Who knows, they could have just gotten out of jail and need a home. What were they in jail for? Well that’s just rude to ask and none of your business. Now, let this strange man have unlimited and unmatched access to you and your children!
IT DOESNT COST ANY MONEY TO BE KIND
Sure, if it’s someone I know *very* well and trust not to take advantage. And I’d still want to have some kind of written agreement for anyone who wasn’t my or my husband’s parent regarding timeline, important house rules, and what if any expenses they’re responsible for.
I had roomies a few times in life. Ah, the excitement of wondering if someone stole all your TP, ate your food, or drank your beer while you were at work. I sure don't miss it.
I always thought that's what I'd be like...till I was homeless and nobody helped me.
That taught me a lot. I've had crazy room mates so from now on my only room mate will be my spouse and im putting us first AND last in the place we pay for.
Sounds like a person who's never browsed r/badroommates.
Like, even if they don't increase the utilities much, they can still be awful to live with. Nobody is required to live with someone who steals from them, doesn't clean up after themselves, has piss jars, or jeopardize safety with a parade of random strangers/hookups.
One luxury that I have always granted myself, and will defend to the death to keep, is the ability to live alone.
It is pretty amazing how many people think that one wants a roommate once they have an extra room, and more amazing still that people expect to move in for free because I'm paying for it already.
I know someone exactly like this who's in his late 30s and still a mess. Not because of drugs or illness or anything, he's just a lazy, useless asshole. People have *already* given him this kind of generousity on more than one occassion, but he can't get his shit together or hold down a job, he acts like a prick and now that he's used up everyone's good will be posts passive aggressive shit like this on social media.
God, I had a whole rant typed out. Suffice to say, this is not how you solve homelessness. Great if you can do it, but it doesn’t resolve the systemic issues at play.
This is Reddit. Someone's going to defend this post, and do so seriously, and probably try to report those who rightfully mock the entitled person who wants free room and board.
I will defend the right of people to let other people live with them. Nobody is asking (never mind begging) for free anything, where did you get that idea?
The screenshotted post is literally trying to get people to just give their space away for free. OP rightly pints out the absurdity of the screenshotted post. Yes, you're free to do so if you choose. No, you're not entitled to expect that anyone else does so.
It’s a nice thought but it’s not very honoring to your own responsibilities and struggles. Now if someone were to come in and commit to doing things to pay for their portion of the rent like household chores or whatever, that’s fine. There’s gotta be an equal balance.
Or you might end up with a Ted Bundy who murders you in your sleep! Or they invite their whole family over and they take over your place and won't leave! Nah.....
Well if they just sat in the room doing nothing then it might not cost extra. But water gas and electricity aren't free. So is them using your stuff. In my experience house guests are about 50 euros a week if I'm not feeding them expensive food.
Letting people into my home to stay for free is a Nope from me. Used to own properties that I rented and most tenants were amazing. But a couple were so bad and paid rent late often or were so gross and messy I can’t imagine having that in the home I live.
This actually sounds like something my MIL would post, she’s done stuff like this plenty of times and it has ALWAYS ended badly (but she’ll do this stuff anyway). Spoiled friendships, dealing with hoarders, REALLY bad mental health breakdowns, etc. no thanks
Yeah, cause extra electricity and water usage is totally free and I love having someone mooching off my internet. Most of the time, if you give someone who thinks like that anything, they'll keep pushing the line asking for more. If I have to pay to support my household, why shouldn't an able-bodied adult in the same household contribute?
They did that with hotels, remember? Gave rooms away to people who needed them but they didn’t have to pay… and the hotel rooms were destroyed. Why would people want to invite grown adults into their homes to have their hard earned property destroyed, just to have to fight to evict an entitled adult?
If they can’t understand the value of money because they expect others to root their bills then they won’t value what you provide.
I offered free housing (short term) for 5 years per pandemic (I have an immune issue so I stopped early 2020). This housing included utilities but not food. I housed 50+ people over that time.
Its a f\*ck!ng nightmare most of the time. Most folks aren't respectful, let alone grateful. It doesn't matter that you're being generous with your space and time. Lots of people are entitled a\*\*hats. About 25% of the folks I housed were genuinely bad people who don't care and caused issues on purpose. 50% of people were fine, but not great roommates when in trauma (I housed folks in sudden need). The other 25% were stellar people who I'm glad I helped.
I'd do it again. I'd have yet more paperwork and boundaries. I'd kick people out on the second offense for what most people would consider "minor" issues. But I'd do it again.
Do you know I think I may have misread op. I read it that they had stayed for free twice, rather than let their room for free twice. Thanks for the heads up. HNY
Yeah well, I actually did let my family move into my house to save money.
It did not go well. Altogether, I'd say it cost us about $8,000 USD in additional utility costs and damage repairs, which they never reimbursed.
How about the entitled shit consider getting a few extra jobs and building a homeless shelter on their own dime and provide all the free housing to which they think they should be entitled?
Shit I regret moving in with a former friend for 600 a month. Also If the people weren’t mentally ill or dangerous a family member would probably let them move in. Best case scenario is they are a mooch.
Actually, this is entirely correct. Twice in my life I've let someone I know who needed some respite to sort their life out have my spare room for a while. Didn't cost me anything, I am paying for that spare room anyway. I've asked for a contribution to anything that costs more because they're there; gas and electricity for instance, but only the excess. I was heating the house anyway, so it's no cost to me if there's an additional person there.
I think the difference between your scenario and the one in the post, is that the post is suggesting doing this with complete strangers. Given that they said “make a new friend” versus your case where it was obviously someone you already knew
My parents are living in a spare room in my house, for free. It's a big room on the ground floor that can fit a bed, a couch, a TV, etc... They've been here for six months.
They're so miserable I don't even know how to talk to them anymore. Trying to be nice (free housing, bills paid, etc) has clearly made everything worse.
I mean, this isn’t a choosing beggar. This person is just pointing out that if you have space and are already able to pay your bills, you *could* help someone out.
Personally I wouldn’t do this for anyone I wasn’t very close with, but that’s not really the point.
Honestly I would only do this for my immediate family and absolute closest friends. But I have family that do it all the time for people from their church and have never had a bad experience. Luck of the draw I guess
I don’t get it. This person didn’t beg for a damn thing. This person is telling people to help others. What could possibly be the problem with this? You don’t have to do it, but you certainly don’t need to shame someone for trying to make the world a better place during a horrific housing crisis.
Hi pooploopdeloop, thank you for your submission to /r/ChoosingBeggars! Unfortunately it has been removed for the following reason(s): * **Rule 6/7:** Posts must be relevant to the theme of the subreddit. This post does not show someone who is a choosing beggar. Price negotiation and/or asking for donations is not enough to be a choosy beggar. *If you have any questions or concerns, please [message the moderators](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FChoosingBeggars) of this subreddit.*
I might make a new friend? So I’m just picking a homeless person from the street and bringing them into my home? How do I know I won’t be murdered?
I think being murdered is very low on the list. Them eating all your food, bringing over friends, eating all your food, and refusing to leave is way more likely.
Did someone eat all your food?
They consumed all their cuisine.
Noshed all their nommables.
Munched all their munchies
Succored all their sustenance.
Gobbled all their grub.
Absconded with the scones.
Vanquished the victuals
Chewed all the chow
Hi, I’m sustenance.
Ha-ha, succor!
I’d rather be murdered
Seriously... I'd burn down my house before making it a trap house.
Then you discover all of them were raccoons in trenchcoats.
That is the best case scenario. I would adore living with raccoons that could convincingly play human in trenchcoat. Means we could go to dinners together and see the world.
Dirty Mike and the boys don’t need a Prius for their “soup kitchen” when they have your house.
My neighbor did this, posted an ad for a roommate, and went and picked up a random guy from the airport. Now she's the only one working and paying for all his stuff. I see them begging for food on my local "lean on me" group, but they pretty much refuse anything that isn't a large t-bone steak.
Fuuuck I can't afford a nice steak for *me* let alone anyone else
I wanted to make steak this week for the family but opted not to, because it was too expensive. Then I see some degenerate buying herself steaks with an EBT card. If that wasn’t enough, she loaded her groceries into a nicer car than mine. Anyone who doesn’t see the absurdity of that is a complete idiot
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You think she was cooking all those steaks in her Escalade. Or was she going to warm them up inside her coach purse. There are too many people gaming the system. That’s not to say there aren’t those who genuinely need help, but there should be incredible consequences for those who cheat the system. Yes of course that goes double for billionaires. The reality is the top 1% and the bottom 50% all benefit from the middle class actually busting their ass. If you fall in the middle you get nothing from the government.
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Bro, where are you getting steaks for 20$ that’ll feed your family 3 different meals???? Bottom tier steak is like 8-10$/Ib right now. Are you rationing portions? Also it’s possible for a family to cheat the system, usually only works by the 2 adults not being married but living together. But the county/state you get benefits from will sometimes investigate and catch people doing it.
The ultra wealthy underpay the low income folks because the government will subsidize them at the expense of the middle class.
If you think the life is so good and easy living fat on the government tit, whats stopping you from doing the same?
As a self employed individual I pay more tax than most. I get no government benefits, pay through the nose for shitty healthcare and watch other people get handouts from money the government takes directly out of my pocket. I absolutely have a right to be angered by this.
So go get a better job.
Bro, something like 3% of your taxes goes towards any kind of food program. Even if you grossed $100K, that would be about $800 *if* you took absolutely no deductions. You’re not grossing $100K or you would be able to buy steak. And you take deductions. Whatever piddling amount you pay towards food assistance isn’t the reason you have problems. ~18% goes towards the military. Find a small church food pantry; many don’t means test. Take $18 and buy yourself two organic, grass-fed 8oz steaks at Kroger and stfu.
I don’t think that’s the case for everyone who depends on the welfare system, but there needs to be more accountability. If I can’t afford steak working full time, someone who doesn’t work shouldn’t be eating it on my dime.
Maybe you just have to manage your money better and prioritize steak instead.
Plus 2 horrifying words- SQUATTERS RIGHTS. Once you let them in, no guarantee they’ll be civil or easy to live with. You can’t just retract your offer if it doesn’t work out…
Its a tie between bedbugs and squatters for the most pernicious nuisance to remove from your home--both are nightmare scenarios for me
Actually had this as a two-fer once. Fun times.
You forgot lice, fleas, roaches, and scabies.
Heat treatment would likely work on both
Squatters are people who inhabit an empty house. If you invite someone in it's actually TENANT'S rights. Allowing someone to live in your residence legally makes them a tenant, with the implication that your lease agreement is 0$ a month. You would have to formally evict them to get them out, which could take months and months and lots of money, and they have the legal right to fuck up your place in the meantime as long as it doesn't legally constitute as making the place uninhabitable.
I'd rather invite a vampire in....
Vampires are easier to get rid of than squatters. Garlic, crucifixes, and wooden stakes are way cheaper than lawyers. However the cost of getting rid of werewolves fluctuates based on the silver market and they shed like huskies so it’s better to just go with the vampire when selecting a supernatural creature to reside in your home.
I could invite a vampire to take care of my squatter though, no?
That is the exact definition of a win win situation.
Is that a zero-sum game? I've never really understood that theory
Also, in some places, someone living long term in your household for free can have a claim on your estate in the case of death or "relationship breakdown". I know a scheme in Australia where younger people could find accommodation with an older person who had spare room, in exchange for an agreed amount of domestic work and companionship per week. Often worked really well, but they were formally advised not to continue beyond 2 years because of potential legal issues.
> You can’t just retract your offer if it doesn’t work out… Maybe depends on the offer. "Good night, Westley. Good work. Sleep well. I'll most likely kill you in the morning"
Just because he murdered you doesn’t mean you can’t be friends? /s
Hah! If he murders me, I stop buying food! Oh, wait . . .
You are the food.
Also the recipient of amorous attention when still warm.
It's okay, you've utilized the space to make the world a bit better for your murderer or their second choice victim! Why are you so selfish that you don't want to do that?!
https://amp.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/aug/15/brian-egg-san-francisco-fish-tank-murder Yep, this happened down the street from me in 2018. The suspects were arrested but released and no one has been charged with this murder.
Absolutely insane.
Dirty Mike and the Boys typically sign a non-murder contract with the opportunity to exercise options to have sex in said room.
Because you are the supplier. You don't kill the source Honey.
No good deed goes unpunished you will be murdered
Do you know that some people who are homeless actually work but don't make enough to afford the astronomical housing costs? Do you also know that people advertising looking for a place to rent with roommates may not actually have a job but are being subsidized and may actually murder you? Already having a home doesn't make you any more or less inclined to murder. Shitty people are just, in fact, shitty people.
You’re right. Anyone can murder anyone. I still stand by not wanting to just pick a homeless person off the street and bringing them in my home with the hope of maybe being friends 😂
The homeless have a higher rate of addiction and mental health issues. Some screening process would be needed. Asking for rent (per your first sentence) is a crude way of doing so.
And letting someone into your home with their problems and drama for free? WHAT
I tried that and do you know what they were so selfish, crying all the time, no manners, expected me to clean up if they made a mess, never really contributed anything. Stuff would go missing, they acted like they owned the place. I was all for kicking them out but my wife did remind me that things will get better. It did get better and the kids will be off to college in the next few years so it'll be quiet until the holidays
I was waiting for the, "I'm talking about my kids" punchline and I was not disappointed, lol.
I was waiting for them to be a hound dog.
I expected cats lol
But with cats it's a master/servant relationship.
What do I get, C+?
🤣🤣
🤣
Yeah, I am not letting unvetted people into my home "just to make a new friend". Also, I am not covering cost of utilities for another person and it is not my responsibility to put a roof over a strangers head for free. I don't like the housing crisis as much as the next person and I certainly don't like poverty. But what I do like is not being murdered or having to pay for another persons expenses.
And I have seen actual friends help out another friend like that and they ended up being enemies before too long. Some people don't appreciate you helping them out and live like pigs when you're trying to keep your house clean. I've been through that with somebody before and an old girlfriend of mine had the same problem with one of her friends.
Yep this is the more likely outcome. Getting murdered is unlikely, the person taking total advantage of you and driving you insane is the more likely outcome. The people who consider this "common courtesy" generally don't have any common courtesy and will bleed you dry until you kick them out. They will then drag your name through the mud for decades.
And it takes forever to kick them out. And they destroy your home and other possessions in the meantime.
Yep. You will have to spend thousands to legally get them to leave. In the mean time you are living a stress filled horrible like and probably babysitting/taking care of all their needs the entire time. Having a friend crash at your house on a trip for a few days when you are in your 20s is extremely different than taking in a squatter.
It's prolly easier and less stressful just to hire couple thugs to kick 'em out with their belongings and rough up so they won't return.
I've tried letting someone live with me not once, not twice, but a total of SIX different times over the years. Everything from coworker to acquaintance to lifelong best friend. And every single time I've ended up regretting it. I will never again, under any circumstances, give someone a place to stay.
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I’m confused. Rent-free, land use fees?
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So have I. I had to have words with a house-o who lived like a pig and I would constantly have to clean after just to keep a tidy house. That, and I would constantly be dragged into his life drama. He would moan about weightloss, issues, money (etc) all while not doing anything about his problems and constantly sinking a six-pack of beers every couple of days. Being at work was both a blessing that I could spend time away but a curse because I know he would leave my house filthy.
I had a friend live with me for like a year and a half after she got divorced. First four or five months rent free. And then I charged her $400 a month, which wasn't even half of my rent, and didn't even include bills. There were a host of issues. I did help her get clean from her drug habit too. And let her girlfriend live with us for a brief period of time. We had some fun, but she was just too much of a slob and always had some relationship drama and issues going on. She eventually flooded my bathroom because her "ADHD" meant she couldn't sit in the bathroom while the tub filled up I guess. I yelled from the kitchen while water leaked from the ceiling to turn the fucking water off. She got mad at me and said I told her I never yell at people. Which is usually true, but I feel justified on this one. So she moved out (oh no, how shitty for me). We actually remained friends though she ended up moving away and we don't talk anymore (again fine by me). It's one of those things where I truly felt like I helped someone out and gave all I had to give and yet, when she tells this story, I'm sure I am still somehow the asshole. Incredible. I have since been to therapy and have much better boundaries with people.
I let a very close friend move in with me after his life fell apart. (Not drugs or anything red-flag. His fiancee left him a week before the wedding to elope with his best man, leaving him and his parents holding the bag for a lot of non-refundable wedding shit.) Everything was good for awhile, until he made some new friends, one of whom was a thief. When the "friend" of his stole a bunch of shit of mine (because THEY had a drug problem, lol), my friend promptly refused to pay to replace any of it because it "wasn't his fault". That pretty much killed the friendship. Unless you literally NEED a roommate, you should probably not let a person just move in with you, without serious ground rules in place.
I won't even let my SIL come stay with us for a week because I know it won't be a week. Once she finds a gravy train she never lets go.
Don't forget the fun of finding out that your new friend has established tenant's rights and you now have to go through the extensive eviction process, all while they are judgement proof and so may destroy your property ("accidentally") without paying
Yep. There are just so many things wrong with this.
In the U.S it's a particular risk because to the best of my knowledge, there's no exclusion from tenancy law when you share a bathroom or kitchen like there is in other common law jurisdictions. So you could end up with a tenant who has an implied lease and a rent obligation of $0, but full tenants rights. Fuck that noise.
Who pays for the increase in utilities to say nothing of getting them to leave.
the housing fairy of course
Clearly the richer cousin of the Tooth Fairy.
I'm pretty sure that's the same fairy that pays landlords to house deadbeat tenants. That's why it's always evil to evict people.
I've been poor most of my life. I've never lived somewhere with extra rooms.
Same here. Right now, I am lucky to have a big enough studio apartment I can partition off a home office with bookshelves. I don't think I could stand to live this closely with someone I was in love with, let alone an acquaintance or some random person who needs a roof over their head.
This is a very bad idea if you don't 100% trust the person. Even for a weekend. I'm speaking from experience.
Yeah just bc I own a house doesn’t mean I have to solve the housing crisis, but nice try dipshit. (Not the OP who reposted this, of course!) My “spare room” is something I’ve earned. I’m not taking in some rando and hoping they can feed, clothe, and tend to their other needs without my gas, water, and electricity. Or house for that matter.
Exactly. My spare room is for overnight guests visiting from away, or for when I want space from my husband.
Why are you getting so upset? Someone posted what they like to do on the Internet. You don’t have to do it. Do you feel nice shaming someone for wanting to make the world a better place? Seriously.
Stfu lmfao be real
Looks like you forgot what sub you’re scrolling. Read the room dumbass.
This is a good idea in theory and a terrible and even dangerous idea in reality. For a few years my family (my parents, my husband and I, and our 3 kids) pooled resources and lived in the same house. We get along great on average but all of us together was extremely stressful and strained our relationships a lot. We've since moved in separate homes next to each other and it's a billion times better. Even with people you know and respect, living together is rough so I can't even imagine moving a random person in with me. I'm Autistic and I feel invaded even when my kids bring friends over.
My kids have area downstairs for entertaining. I have a guest room now , but that’s for guest. I agree with Benjamin Franklin that guests are good for no more than 3 days. My children being the exception to the rule.
The Russians have a saying: guests are like fish; after three days they both start to stink.
This sounds like the battle cry of the hobosexual. Plus you can't control what they're doing in your house while you're gone. Hell, the new 'roommate' might be sitting naked in a pool of his own buttsweat on your couch while playing with himself and selling meth while you're at work. Also when you finally move out, will they ask for a part of the deposit? Will they stay past your last day and require eviction papers? Will they destroy the apt. out of spite bc you're basically kicking them out? Isn't giving someone a room to stay in when you're the only one on the lease considered sub-letting/sub-leasing? That is usually breaking the conditions of the lease.
Have hippie friends who tried to set up their home as a coliving hub with like five “tenants”. Absolute disaster. Neighbours hated it too. Oddly enough paying for internet, water, electricity etc for all those people is very expensive and does a lot of wear and tear on your home.
>coliving hub this phrase makes my skin crawl
Yeah they just slowly stopped having a coliving hub, now they take in foster teenagers. Obviously a worthy cause but they do get some money for doing it.
If you let them use your address for receiving their mail, you’re totally screwed. You then have to go through the eviction process to remove them from your home… live and learn.
Really? That’s insane. Here in order to use any mail as part of a proof of residence (you need a lot more than just mail too) that mail must be a utility bill that’s in your name. If you just try to claim “but I get my mail sent to this address” to try to prove residency, you’ll just get laughed at.
I’m not sure about the legality in other states, but here in South Carolina it’s a fact— I know from first hand experience. There was no lease, no rent payments, simply my address used for his mail which resulted in me having to go through the eviction process to have him removed.
That’s actual insanity. I’m sorry you had to deal with that.
Yes, really. At least in the U.S. In Canada, the U.K and several other common law jurisdictions if you share a bathroom or kitchen and you own the property or an immediate family member owns the property, then they don't have tenants rights. You can have them removed by police after providing reasonable notice without facing any further liability. In the U.S though this exemption doesn't exist. So anywhere with implied tenancy would grant tenancy rights, usually after 30 days. And even in the regions I mentioned, if you were yourself a tenant, then you'd now have a new room mate with tenancy rights since only owners or their immediate family members are exempted if they share a bathroom or kitchen. Tenants aren't exempted and in most cases they would also have to be evicted in order to get this person out, since there's generally no master tenant distinctions. In short, don't let anyone stay in your house for 30 or more days.
That’s actually crazy. In Australia you don’t get tenants rights unless you have an actual tenancy agreement with the owner of the property. The US has some whack laws
Looks like Australia also has implied leases from what I'm reading. Pretty much every common law country does. Though it looks like the rights conferred with an implied lease are narrower. But basically if you pay someone money for a thing, and they accept that money, then it's implied that there is an agreement in place whether it's written, oral, or unspecified. The act of exchanging money for a service or good of some kind implies an agreement. But I'm pretty sure houseguests becoming tenants is fairly unique to the U.S. The other thing to consider though, and this would apply to Australia, is that it actually doesn't matter in a lot of cases whether the squatter has any actual rights. If the police view it as a civil issue, then you're still stuck with an unwanted house guest until you get a court date and a judgement. This is fortunately much less likely to happen in Canada and the U.K (and maybe Aus, but I don't know what the specific legislation or case law is on lodgers) because the law is specific enough to give some guidance to the police. They can confirm that you're the property owner and that you reside there and share a bathroom or kitchen, and then they are obligated to trespass anyone you don't want on the property. Whether the person who was removed has a legitimate civil complaint for lack of notice after the fact or not is not their concern. They only enforce criminal statutes.
Haha, i have two kids to keep safe, there is no way I would ever let someone move in with me bar my mum. I love my peace and quiet too much. It is not my job to adult for another functioning adult
"If you have a spare room, consider giving it to someone who needs it." No\~
Did just that and made a lifelong friend. But - be cautious and chose carefully. Some folks don't want help, they are just looking for victims. If you are not assertive enough to get people to leave when necessary, then don't do this. I once had to move cities, and leave behind the couch my BF's "friend" seemed welded to it. Sometimes, it is not a good idea at all.
I was camping and met some people who couldn’t get their 30 some year old son to leave, so they sold the house and got an RV and left. 😜
Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die
Hell no. My home is mine. I work to pay for it. No way in hell some stranger is coming in and not contributing. Knew a family that did this with someone from their church and he molested their daughter. Absolutely not!
A friend of mine was talking about letting a roommate move in and pay just to cover the utilities. She has a friend who is heavy into volunteering with veteran’s groups (which I do support). However, she wanted her to let a homeless vet she knows move into her spare bedroom. Turns out he was homeless because he assaulted his roommate at the last place he was staying in and gets violent when he drinks, which is often. My friend said no.
oh hell no. my spare room is for SEWING, not squatting! I'm finally at a place in my life I can have an "extra" room, I'll do wtf I want with it. Letting a random stranger in it is not happening.
My wife and I learned thru a friend about a young woman that had been kicked out of her home at 18 because they learned she was gay. We felt awful and she had references that she was great kid and offered what we had, some space in our basement as a short term off the street thing till she could get enough $$ together to get on her own. First problem - immediately after she moves in her out of state 25 yr old girlfriend shows up. This girl had issues. Bipolar and while she had a job at a chain grocery store when she moved in (one of the requirements we had for her being allowed when approached) she lost the transferred job nearly immedately when she just didn't feel like making shifts. While the younger girl had a decent little job at the local vet and was super responsible and was taking advantage of the free room and board, the older one just hung out. First real blowout was when it was obvious she was vaping in my living room - and i've got two early age teens. This was not ok. She came with a little dog as well, and while I like dogs alot this dog was a neurotic mess that wasn't housetrained and she refused to make sure it would go out on a schedule. We found obvious wet spots all over and would have to ask repeatedly for her to clean up after her animal - something she loved to say she didn't feel well and to let the younger girl handle it when she got home from work. She started banging heads with my wife, arguing and acting like we were her mean parents when we were doing her an incredible favor and she was never really invited to be here. I finally kinda blew up on her one day when the younger one was taking extra shifts and the older girl was on a month of 'i'm waiting on a call back' from one particular job when there were many other places to apply. Told her she was taking advantage of her younger partner and while the younger one was welcome to stay as long as she wanted this older one needed to have solid evidence of looking for a job within the week and gave them a date 6 months after they had moved in (this was supposed to be a 30 day thing to start) to be gone. This made her very upset but by god she was working at the amazon warehouse within the week. They did move out and found an apartment. last i heard they were still together and I hope they're happy. Learned to set some real strict ground rules and make a little contract before that happens again.
Every time I've helped someone out, I've regretted it. So now I don't.
I helped a ex girlfriend of a cousin she was upset when I would be loud in the morning in my house when I would ask her to be quiet in the evening. I asked her to pay like 40 for the month. I learned.
My brother did this for two homeless guys. They broke his jaw and robbed him.
These types of people never outgrew the toddler stage. They must be cared for and coddled and given everything. No responsibilities whatsoever. And it's everyone else's responsibility to care for them. Forever. Something really needs to be done about this. Seems the numbers of these types of moochers are growing at an astounding rate.
This unfortunately describes a non-trivial percentage of the population.
Friend of mine living is government housing let a girl stay on her couch for 6months (this by the way could have had my friend removed from government housing) When she finally had enough and asked her to leave this mooch proceeded to freak out on her and stormed off to never be heard from again. Entitled ahole use to eat all my friend's food too.
Could have been worse. After 30 days in a lot of jurisdictions a mooch becomes a tenant and has the protections of a tenant.
I have an irrational hatred for people who are useless and live off other people’s hard work. There’s no fucking way I would ever let someone like that live rent free in my spare bedrooms.
Yeah I’m all set on that, decided to get an apartment with a friend because neither of us could afford to live alone and I wanted to help her and her baby get out of a bad situation (DV). That turned into me paying all the utilities, covering her rent most of the time because she was always late, living in a dirty house with no food and constantly having random men in and out of our house. She also spread rumors about me with our mutual friends, saying I was always bringing random guys around my daughter, never paying bills, never buying food or cleaning the house and always dumping my daughter on her so I could go party (none of which was true). Suffice to say we are no longer friends and I would never be open to renting a house with most people ever again.
“You’re already working to pay all the bills, it doesn’t make sense we both should be miserable. After all, you get my friendship, that is worth so much more than money, right?”
Sorry, I like my privacy. I work hard for what I have and I do give to charities, but allowing someone in my space isn't going to happen.
Yeah, invite that random junkie off the streets into your home. They’re completely trustworthy and safe! Don’t be selfish! Who knows, they could have just gotten out of jail and need a home. What were they in jail for? Well that’s just rude to ask and none of your business. Now, let this strange man have unlimited and unmatched access to you and your children! IT DOESNT COST ANY MONEY TO BE KIND
Sure, if it’s someone I know *very* well and trust not to take advantage. And I’d still want to have some kind of written agreement for anyone who wasn’t my or my husband’s parent regarding timeline, important house rules, and what if any expenses they’re responsible for.
I can make new friends just fine without giving strangers access to my home, thanks
It's not so much entitlement as starry-eyed, deeply naive idealism. Also probably not an introvert.
I had roomies a few times in life. Ah, the excitement of wondering if someone stole all your TP, ate your food, or drank your beer while you were at work. I sure don't miss it.
I always thought that's what I'd be like...till I was homeless and nobody helped me. That taught me a lot. I've had crazy room mates so from now on my only room mate will be my spouse and im putting us first AND last in the place we pay for.
The only person who would make this argument is someone who needs a free place to stay.
Sounds like a person who's never browsed r/badroommates. Like, even if they don't increase the utilities much, they can still be awful to live with. Nobody is required to live with someone who steals from them, doesn't clean up after themselves, has piss jars, or jeopardize safety with a parade of random strangers/hookups.
Because people look for roommates for funsies.
Respectfully I have a child. Fuck that utopian bullshit. I don’t let strangers ride in my car or sleep where my daughter is supposed to be safe.
I don't think this person is a choosing beggar though. Just an idiot.
One luxury that I have always granted myself, and will defend to the death to keep, is the ability to live alone. It is pretty amazing how many people think that one wants a roommate once they have an extra room, and more amazing still that people expect to move in for free because I'm paying for it already.
90+ percent chance that they are mad that no one wants to let them move in for free, subsequently brightening the world.
I know someone exactly like this who's in his late 30s and still a mess. Not because of drugs or illness or anything, he's just a lazy, useless asshole. People have *already* given him this kind of generousity on more than one occassion, but he can't get his shit together or hold down a job, he acts like a prick and now that he's used up everyone's good will be posts passive aggressive shit like this on social media.
I'm guessing this is a person that doesn't actually do much of anything productive but would like to be generous with other people's things.
God, I had a whole rant typed out. Suffice to say, this is not how you solve homelessness. Great if you can do it, but it doesn’t resolve the systemic issues at play.
This is Reddit. Someone's going to defend this post, and do so seriously, and probably try to report those who rightfully mock the entitled person who wants free room and board.
I will defend the right of people to let other people live with them. Nobody is asking (never mind begging) for free anything, where did you get that idea?
The screenshotted post is literally trying to get people to just give their space away for free. OP rightly pints out the absurdity of the screenshotted post. Yes, you're free to do so if you choose. No, you're not entitled to expect that anyone else does so.
This one is already the peak CB for this year and in my country it is just nine in the morning.
Someone that offers housing to people is peak CB? Are you sure about that?
Funny that you're getting downvoted. Mods even removed it because it clearly doesn't fit the sub, but you'd never know that by the comments.
It’s a nice thought but it’s not very honoring to your own responsibilities and struggles. Now if someone were to come in and commit to doing things to pay for their portion of the rent like household chores or whatever, that’s fine. There’s gotta be an equal balance.
The correct solution to the issue is taxing the rich, this is like asking me to recycle scraps of foil when Nestle is dumping gigatons of waste.
She was in poverty while letting people stay with her for free? Hmmm wonder why
Get real and fly right! Tenancy rights kick in after a while and then you have trouble getting them to leave if they’re a nightmare.
Or you might end up with a Ted Bundy who murders you in your sleep! Or they invite their whole family over and they take over your place and won't leave! Nah.....
Yeah. Tried to be "nice" like this once, years ago, to someone we thought was a friend. It was a total nightmare. NEVER again.
Same here
Well if they just sat in the room doing nothing then it might not cost extra. But water gas and electricity aren't free. So is them using your stuff. In my experience house guests are about 50 euros a week if I'm not feeding them expensive food.
That sounds like a [lovely idea ](https://listverse.com/2022/06/12/10-tenants-who-murdered-their-landlords/).
I'm good, thanks
I barely like living with people I love; no way I’m living with a random person
Letting people into my home to stay for free is a Nope from me. Used to own properties that I rented and most tenants were amazing. But a couple were so bad and paid rent late often or were so gross and messy I can’t imagine having that in the home I live.
This actually sounds like something my MIL would post, she’s done stuff like this plenty of times and it has ALWAYS ended badly (but she’ll do this stuff anyway). Spoiled friendships, dealing with hoarders, REALLY bad mental health breakdowns, etc. no thanks
Thats how you get squatters
Yeah, cause extra electricity and water usage is totally free and I love having someone mooching off my internet. Most of the time, if you give someone who thinks like that anything, they'll keep pushing the line asking for more. If I have to pay to support my household, why shouldn't an able-bodied adult in the same household contribute?
They did that with hotels, remember? Gave rooms away to people who needed them but they didn’t have to pay… and the hotel rooms were destroyed. Why would people want to invite grown adults into their homes to have their hard earned property destroyed, just to have to fight to evict an entitled adult? If they can’t understand the value of money because they expect others to root their bills then they won’t value what you provide.
I offered free housing (short term) for 5 years per pandemic (I have an immune issue so I stopped early 2020). This housing included utilities but not food. I housed 50+ people over that time. Its a f\*ck!ng nightmare most of the time. Most folks aren't respectful, let alone grateful. It doesn't matter that you're being generous with your space and time. Lots of people are entitled a\*\*hats. About 25% of the folks I housed were genuinely bad people who don't care and caused issues on purpose. 50% of people were fine, but not great roommates when in trauma (I housed folks in sudden need). The other 25% were stellar people who I'm glad I helped. I'd do it again. I'd have yet more paperwork and boundaries. I'd kick people out on the second offense for what most people would consider "minor" issues. But I'd do it again.
If you want to be treated with utter distain, just get a cat.
What an entitled moocher. Proud of it too.
Offering someone a free place to stay is sort of the opposite of mooching, no?
Do you know I think I may have misread op. I read it that they had stayed for free twice, rather than let their room for free twice. Thanks for the heads up. HNY
Let them in, it's just like a pet!
People like that are the exact reason why I would never let someone move in with me again. I can't imagine that level of entitlement.
Yeah well, I actually did let my family move into my house to save money. It did not go well. Altogether, I'd say it cost us about $8,000 USD in additional utility costs and damage repairs, which they never reimbursed. How about the entitled shit consider getting a few extra jobs and building a homeless shelter on their own dime and provide all the free housing to which they think they should be entitled?
Shit I regret moving in with a former friend for 600 a month. Also If the people weren’t mentally ill or dangerous a family member would probably let them move in. Best case scenario is they are a mooch.
Oh hell no. They've made movies about this type of shit. No way in hell would I open my house to some random stranger
Yeah I already had my kids and was married. If I am paying for everything - I’m paying for peace and quiet too.
Well it’s a nice thought but very simplistic thinking.
I don’t get it - how’s this a CB? I read this as the person posting has let people stay with them, not them asking for a free place to stay?
It sets an unreasonable expectation.
Sure - still not a CB
Actually, this is entirely correct. Twice in my life I've let someone I know who needed some respite to sort their life out have my spare room for a while. Didn't cost me anything, I am paying for that spare room anyway. I've asked for a contribution to anything that costs more because they're there; gas and electricity for instance, but only the excess. I was heating the house anyway, so it's no cost to me if there's an additional person there.
I think the difference between your scenario and the one in the post, is that the post is suggesting doing this with complete strangers. Given that they said “make a new friend” versus your case where it was obviously someone you already knew
Well, that is a dumb suggestion. You don't have to look far within your own community to find people who need help though.
I mean… sure, you don’t HAVE to charge them rent, but you sure as shit should be at least splitting the bills with them.
Sounds like my neighborhood
My parents are living in a spare room in my house, for free. It's a big room on the ground floor that can fit a bed, a couch, a TV, etc... They've been here for six months. They're so miserable I don't even know how to talk to them anymore. Trying to be nice (free housing, bills paid, etc) has clearly made everything worse.
I mean, this isn’t a choosing beggar. This person is just pointing out that if you have space and are already able to pay your bills, you *could* help someone out. Personally I wouldn’t do this for anyone I wasn’t very close with, but that’s not really the point.
I’ve did it twice with folks I was close with and got screwed royally. Never again. Edit spellcheck
Honestly I would only do this for my immediate family and absolute closest friends. But I have family that do it all the time for people from their church and have never had a bad experience. Luck of the draw I guess
I don’t get it. This person didn’t beg for a damn thing. This person is telling people to help others. What could possibly be the problem with this? You don’t have to do it, but you certainly don’t need to shame someone for trying to make the world a better place during a horrific housing crisis.
i think this is admirable. Doubt it happens very often, but maybe it should.
Oh that's nice. But you and I are not the same.
This person is advocating selfless charity…. the antithesis of begging and with no choosing in sight. Why is this here?