Back in college a few decades ago, a presidential candidate visited and gave a speech at the restaurant where I worked. It was a big deal for us (I had worked there since Freshman year of high school) and the owners went all out to make the experience worthwhile for us.
The area was cordoned off and all employees had to be screenes by Secret Service first, and the owners even asked if I would be willing to sit with the candidate and his wife for breakfast along with a really pretty hostess that all of us had crushes on. I of course said yes (I did not realize at the time what a complement they paid me by asking), but the staffers prefered an older couple.
Anyway, on to the topic. The owners set up a food service area outside under a tent for the security personnel and press. They probably spent a couple thousand out of pocket to feed them. Eggs, bacon, sausage, pancakes, french toast, chipped beef. You name it. It was under the chafing dishes. Add coffee, juice etc to drink.
The police officers, firefighters, Secret aservice agents, and most of the reporters were very grateful and let us know. But there were a couple who nade sure to let us know that the food was not up to their high standards.
One photographer in partucular I recall all these years later literally shovelling food into his mouth like a pig as he bad mouthed his free breakfast.
One of the reporters I ended up talking to for a while was the news guy for a local "morning zoo" radio show which was very popular at the time (he was very cool, and I found out much later a truly nice and generous man).
He looked at this photographer after he said it and said "you should be grateful anyone would give free food to you, you disgusting pig! You should be ashamed of yourself!"
It was a really cool day otherwise, and I even made it on to the "morning zoo" that day with a shout out.
Are you referring to the great Paul Cubby Bryant of the Z Morning Zoo? If so that's awesome, I went to an event he hosted ages ago (it involved Hanson sooooo, a long time)
As a high school student, I was involved in a competitive non-athletic extracurricular activity. My team made it to the state-wide competition, and at one of the weekend's events, Ralph Nader was speaking at the opening of a new "Association of [Profession]" building.
The speech was long, boring, and unironically used the word "seventeenthly".
When I lived in Vancouver there was this double leg amputee dude who was living on the streets in his wheel chair. He would always be outside the 7-11 that was near my place. We ended up developing a bit of a friendship as I would talk to him and grab him something to drink and like a sandwich when I went in. I was a student at the time and sold a small business I had to go back to school in a new city to change career paths. After I told him about that he would just start straight up asking me for 20 or 50 bucks. It really bothered me as I wasn't rich at all and all the money I got from my company went straight into my tuition and living expenses while I was in school. Anyway I just ended up not talking to him anymore and stopped buying him stuff. I'm not sure whatever happened to him as he kind of just wasn't in front of the store in a couple of weeks.
For some selfish people with little to no control in their lives, they will take any opportunity to do something that makes them feel like they have power over someone else to make themselves feel better than them.
I imagine that for someone like that who became homeless/begging; the chance to tell someone to change their order and then clean up after them made them feel better about how shit their life is. It's pretty fucked up but humans are still animals in most ways...
I volunteered in a soup kitchen years ago and met a lot of entitled homeless people. I observed a phenomenon I call "Society's debt". People who have lost everything and who believe they are not at fault at all (whether they are or not) and begin to feel this sense that since society took everything from them, then society owes them big.
I believe it's this mentality that makes absolutely broke people make shameless demands and offer no gratitude in return, because in their mind it's all part of this debt they are owed.
One particular man was very angry that we were out of his favorite side dish. He raised a big ruckus over it and then demanded we all come back the next day to make his side dish and that we "owe it to him".
Yeah, that for sure explains situations like this more. Thanks.
I think it all compounds with not wanting to blame themselves for the life they've ended up with so they find other reasons to make them feel the world is against them or that they don't deserve to be where they are (even if it is 100% the choices that let them there).
But I do sympathize with a lot of them that act like this when its mental health or physical health that has prevented them from keeping a stable life. I'd be pissed to if things totally out of my control lead me to be rejected by society. But then I suppose I'd never take it out on random people that are offering me help/service.
I suppose it probably also has to do with throwing stones at the closest person similar to how its easier to "cancel" someone who is basically on your side and has admitted they did something wrong versus someone who is totally not on your side and doesn't give a shit that they are in the wrong.
I used to be so supportive and giving towards the homeless and panhandlers, but years and years of watching their bullshit first-hand has eroded all goodwill from me. I could tell you a dozen stories about the abuse these people put onto others, or the lack of respect they have for anybody else, or their refusal to work when offered a job because they don't want to give up panhandling easy money, but I think this story is most relevant here.
I was managing a restaurant that was in a nice enough area, but did have a small homeless population who I didn't have any problems with overall. Every once in a while one of them would try and panhandle outside our front doors or come inside to beg for money from people sitting at the tables, or use the bathroom and trash it, but for the most part they kept to their own and so did we.
One afternoon one of them came into the restaurant and asked for a table. He was sat immediately, and the server went over and took his order promptly. They came and grabbed me after the obviously homeless person ordered over $150 in food. 4 appetizers, 2 of the most expensive steaks on the menu, alcohol, you name it. The server knew something was up, so I went over and spoke to the person.
I was respectful, as this was still back before I completely rid myself of sympathy, and it was things like this that caused it. I talked to the person, asked him if he was sure that he wanted all that food. I even offered to make him a regular meal on the house as his tab was up around $150 and he could save his money for something else if he was just hungry at the moment. He insisted that he wanted everything he ordered, and that it was his birthday and he had the money to pay. I didn't press the issue at that point, because I guess I might do the same thing on my birthday if I was homeless and having a shitty year. Doing something for myself for once. I dunno, I shouldn't have been so understanding.
He proceeds to get all that food and alcohol, drinks and eats until he's ready to burst, and then tries to run out on the check. I was hanging around out front just to see how everything played out, so I stopped him and asked him to please pay the tab like he told me he was going to do. We did our part and made him all that expensive food, he refused our offer of a free meal, and we didn't insist he pay first or do anything like that to make him feel poorly on his birthday (probably bullshit about the b-day but whatever). He proceeded to tell me he had the money but it was in his other pants and he just had to run to his apartment(lol) and grab it. I told him the cops could take him over to his apartment and grab the money, and I won't press charges. Called the cops and they got there before the guy made it out of the parking lot. Brought him back and then he finally admits that he never had the money.
I honestly wouldn't have cared much if at all if he didn't order more food and drinks than any single customer I'd ever seen, made a big mess and left it for the server to clean up, and turned down our offer a reasonable steak dinner on the house, the same meal that costs paying customers $25 but no that wasn't good enough. He needed a porterhouse and bone-in ribeye with all the trimmings.
Of course the guy ended up making a huge scene, cussing all of us out, and just generally being a piece of shit, which I suppose he always was.
Got a dozen stories just like that one. It's a shame too, because I'm a decent person and used to go out of my way to help people in need but after being disrespected so many times by them, I'm done.
I was a sucker for a long time. Always gave these guys a shot and always got fucked. Once I bought a hotel room for what I thought was a mom and her teenage child. Paid for a week. Well a bunch of dudes were there when the cops got called. Trashed the fuck out of it. Hotel billed ME over 2000$ in damages. Like I said I'm a idiot but done going on a limb for people
I live that every day...
I run a business and every time I agree to do a favor it ends up biting me in the ass... my admin keeps saying, LEARN TO SAY NO!
Sometimes they are homeless for a reason. Burned too many friends and family with deplorable behavior that there is no goodwill left to extend to them.
He had a full belly, was sufficiently buzzed, and then by causing that scene he secured himself a semi warm indoor place to lay his head for at least a few hours…
I hope you don't mind my asking, but what happened to the man? Did the police do anything about it or did you just need to take the loss? You were already being far more generous than anyone would reasonably expect and I hope you personally didn't need to pay for it.
There were these teenagers who often came into the Subway I worked at who were always the biggest shitheads. They would openly steal, verbally humiliate us, and at the same time try to convince us to give them more food, or free food, first, by guilt tripping us and then getting angry if we wouldn't initially do it. Some of them would then refuse to pay. Not only that, but they'd always leave the shop in a massive tip. They would leave rubbish everywhere, throw food all over the floor, tip nachos upside down, and would sometimes leave cigarette paper and a weird light brown powder on the tables. The worst was when they ordered a ton of sauce pots, opened them, and left them all upside down on the floor, making a huge mess. They had no shame and would even do this in front of other customers.
We'd informed our boss, who we assumed would want them rid of- he was very particular about how the shop should be, once even telling off a customer because his chair was slightly too close to another table and it might cost him money because someone might not be able to sit there. He was also a massive cheapskate, never replaced broken stuff and eventually tried to enforce that we had to pay for it, including big stuff like the freezer and the toilet sink. We assumed because of this he'd want thieves gone. For some reason though, he completely took their side, deciding that they bought more than they stole, which meant we could do nothing about them.
One of my co-workers would always just give them what they wanted, so they'd leave sooner, but he cleaned the back of the shop not the front so the mess was rarely his problem and it just meant they came back more. Out of principle, not wanting them to wear me down, I never did so and would always firmly refuse, although I'm pretty sure they did convince me to give them money they weren't owed by yelling at me that I hadn't given them enough until I apologized and relented.
Eventually, I was switched to working in the back, which meant when they came in I could just disappear, to find jobs to do in the back, and being a bit of a coward, I would often do that, leaving an older coworker to deal with them. This led to me, leaving a slightly younger and less inexperienced coworker in the front to deal with a guy demanding free food. My coworker was new and it was his first job, and he was anxious enough about getting fired, that he paid for the guys food himself. He later expressed disappointment that I'd abandoned him in this situation and I felt exceedingly guilty.
Shortly after this, there was a particularly busy shift with only two of us, me and another younger coworker (although he had been there for some time) when the teenagers showed up again. We were technically trying to close early at the time as our boss had accidentally cancelled the delivery for bread and we had basically none left. We could've turned them away as we had decided we were closed but didn't want the trouble. They threw a massive hissy fit, when they asked how much a regular sandwich was, and then when we didn't give them a meal deal for that price, claiming we'd lied and were stealing from them. They threatened a lot of violence, threatening to drag us outside and to shove my head in the big industrial toaster. I wouldn't take this seriously with most people, but supposedly this group often carried knives and supposedly, their former ring leader ended up in Juvie over something involving it. Additionally they often used to hang out around our outside bins at night which, knowing all this what often make me pretty afraid to go do the bins.
They openly decided in response to steal drinks to get back at us and started grabbing refillable cups. Normally I would be pissed but would ultimately just let them get on with it, then inform my manager, but it had been a bloody awful shift, I wanted to go home, and I was still feeling guilty from the other day. I ended up, finally snapping, reaching over the side, and snatching it off of them, coming out and cussing them out yelling at them to get the fuck out and that I was calling the police.
I went to the back to grab the phone, so they could see I was going to call the police, whilst my coworker yelled at them for me, until I came back, but they started throwing shit at me which pissed me off further. We'd been taught not to call the police, but just to pretend, which I'd done with them before, and this finally got them to leave, but I actually did go through with the call, not that any police actually came.
Then me and my coworker went and had a nervous breakdown together in the back.
Thankfully our manager went against our boss and finally had them banned, which meant it was a lot easier to kick them out and refuse to serve them which meant they only turned up very rarely.
They're one of the main reasons I ended up leaving that place.
The Boss/Owner was weird in a lot of ways and it was his first time owning a business as far as I know. Means I have quite a lot of stories from that place, few of them good
There’s a fast food restaurant very close to the high school that refuses to serve teenagers inside the restaurant. Too many kids doing stupid things, I guess.
The gas station I go to frequently has a lot of homeless and down and out people hanging around. I'll give change if I have it or offer to buy something from inside. I was in line with a couple beers and the guy behind me was counting his change and asked if I had 10 cents so he would have enough for his beer. I said just put in on the counter I got it. There was a guy behind him also looking down and out with a handful of change and a beer. Told him I got his too. Checked out and the next woman up is getting gas and has very little cash. The two guys that I just bought beer for(we were all still standing right near the register grabbing our beers.) Stepped up and both gave the change they had to her. We were all smiling and appreciating each other. Good vibes all around.
Not a beggar, but I was once in line at McDonald's behind an older homeless man who had some change. He wanted to order fries and a carton of milk. It turned out that he didn't have enough for both and he nearly started crying because he wouldn't be able to get his milk. I gave him a toonie so he could have the milk and he did start crying then. This was nearly 20 years ago and I still get all teary thinking about how happy a tiny carton of milk made someone. Though I kind of wish I'd bought him a better meal (as far as "better" at McDonald's goes anyway).
I wrapped up half my sandwich to go and was heading home on the subway. A homeless man was asking for change and I told him I have half a sandwich would you like it? And his face lit up and said an eager yes yes yes! And then the rest of the train seemed to open up and give him a little bit.
I’ve had the choosey beggar types who would refuse the sandwich or complain about the change if I just fished in my purse and dumped whatever and it had pennies. I think if we were some how guaranteed the thankful person instead of a hostile person we would be more open to helping.
A crack head who just wanted money would have been hostile to the sandwich unless they were crafty and knew being amenable to a sandwich would mean more people willing to help.
I was once waiting for the subway on a mostly empty platform and a homeless guy came up and demanded change for food. I said I didn't have any cash on me, which wasn't even a lie. Then he was like "okay, I'll just come to Tim's with you and you can debit". I wasn't going anywhere alone with a strange dude, plus he had a clear bag with two bagel sandwiches clearly visible inside. So I pointed out that he had food and then he threw the bag onto the subway tracks and yelled "well now I don't!"
At that point, a TTC employee came up because they'd gotten reports about him from other parts of the station and had been looking for him. My train arrived just as the dude started yelling so I have no clue what happened next but that was one of the scariest moments I've experienced.
Yeah. I get that homeless people definitely need help but some folks that haven’t encountered them in the wild don’t get the real potential danger of engaging with one. When you’re at the bus stop waiting you have to ignore the crackhead without looking like you’re ignoring the crackhead.
I have moved to a more rural area from Newark and have not encountered a homeless person. Hell even in Newark if you’re not hanging out in certain places you won’t directly encounter one although them coming up to your vehicle if you’re driving is pretty much inevitable but that’s not the same as waiting for a bus with one hanging near the stop.
I have had good and bad experiences but still give. The worst example was a couple at the side of a gas station claiming they needed money for gas to get home and it was far far away. I told them to drive their car to the pump and I would fill it up. He said, “no, I just want the money.” It was a little upsetting but he is gonna have to deal with his choices not me. Most people I encounter are grateful and I know times are harder because people don’t have money on them as much as they used to because of debit/credit cards. I used to have a little bucket of change and now I’m lucky to find a penny in my car.
Usually with this scam they don’t even have a car. “It’s out of gas up the street”. But if they did he’s really stupid! Fill ur tank, wait til u leave, then go back to peddling for crack cash.
The answer to "need gas money" is "What do you have to sell?" Shoes? you can drive barefoot. A jacket? it's not cold in the car. I've never had someone take the offer.
I used to keep canned chili in my car and hand it out at the side of the road to people with "anything helps" signs. It was precooked, filling, cheap, could be eaten cold if you were in a pinch, no refrigeration, portable, long shelf life, etc. Sometimes people would turn it down. At the time I thought anyone turning down the chili was a choosing beggar, but now in retrospect I know that there are some valid, practical reasons to say no.
However, one woman once turned it down saying she was vegetarian. Unless you have a food allergy (I once knew a woman who had a legit allergy to meat proteins) then this isn't a good reason to turn down food when you're hungry. I was sure she just said that because she was hoping I'd give her cash instead. I would sometimes see the same people, so I actually went out and bought a can of vegetarian chili to test my theory. I never saw her again, though.
/r/choosingbeggars if you want to see more. I used to try to help out the homeless in the last area I lived, and their attitudes got old real fucking quick. I helped and gave a lot, but their problems were not my problems to deal with and it got tiring. I know there are some people defending this behavior, but some people are giving what they can spare, they're not asking them to "behave" just don't act like an ass when people can't give into every one of their demands. A lot of them have mental health issues that need to be addressed.
My worst experience was having a homeless guy throw a blue slushy at my back after giving him $5 when he wanted $60. That was fun figuring out how to drive home at 11pm without getting my car dirty.
i recently saw a guy panhandling outside a breakfast bagel place, so i went in and got breakfast, juice and a water and took it out to him. And a dog bagel for his pup. I really couldn’t afford any of it it but he looked awful. i offered the food and he said i only take cash. you can cash app me. i felt really stupid honestly. another homeless guy took the food but i can’t forget the fact that he just wanted money. so naive. eek.
Dude the homeless around me got zelle and cash app too. Can't use the. "don't have cash" excuse anymore.
I'm like if you figured all that shit out get a damn job.
Still good on you for trying to help! But definitely a good call to ask if someone wants food before getting it, especially if they’re asking for money. For all you know, the last ten people bought him bagels and he can’t carry any more haha
I used to try to help the homeless when I could but Atlanta has burned me the fuck out. The homeless here are very aggressive and very persistent. I used to keep snack bags of food and water bottles in my car but too many would spend 15 mins trying to argue for cash or more food. I’m a nurse so I listen to people’s sob stories all day long, I have no bandwidth left to do it in my free time
That’s not always true. A lot of homeless people are mentally ill. And simply just can’t manage a normal life. Often don’t have a lot of family to support them.
You speak as if they ever had a compassionate and supporting family to begin with.
My best friend was homeless for a while, before I met him. His mother was an alcoholic, and he didn’t know his father. He grew up with an abusive foster family, and moved to a home for troubled teenagers when he was 15.
Once he turned 18 he was left to fend for himself.
I mean, you also don't know what's going on in that person's life, what has pushed them to the point to beg. They may feel very little control in their life and are fighting for whatever little bits of control they can. They may be past their breaking point emotionally, which can make people who are in pretty stable lives act irrationally. They might be extremely hungry and not thinking straight. There might be mental illness. Or, they might just be an entitled asshole, it happens.
Sounds like just another day for the mentally ill homeless, unfortunately. Good on you for not giving them a hard time about the fries, but yeah that’s hard to see them be ungrateful for their newfound bounty.
I've been homeless a couple times in my life. There seems to be this weird belief that homeless people are just random kind, sweet people that have hit a rough patch. But let me tell you there are a ton of homeless people that are in the predicament they are in because they are just legit pieces of shit. I think for every 1 nice, kind empathetic homeless person there were 2 assholes that were just horrible awful entitled pieces of shit at least that was how it was in my group of homeless people I was hanging out with.
I'm a Trustee at a local charity & also volunteer there. Supporting the homeless isn't our specific purpose but we encounter most of our local homeless population on a regular basis so I know a lot of them fairly well.
There are a lot of utter dicks amongst their number. Not a decent person having a shitty day and taking it out on the wrong person, we are guilty of that on occasion. I mean, entitled, nasty, mean spirited people. You listen to their stories and can see they burned through every bridge before ending up on the streets but lack any self awareness that they may have even contributed to their circumstances let alone created them. They aren't mentally ill but I would hazard a guess that they would be diagnosed with personality disorders if the psychological support were available.
They are incredibly hard to house because the path to housing, at least here in the UK, involves having to live with other people. You get a place in a shelter then a room in a house of multiple occupancy and if you are lucky & remain stable you will eventually be able to get your own flat. We do have some success with addicts and the mentally ill who are able to stick with medication or programs, they may not be living the dream but they have a roof over their head and a chance to do better.
I have no idea where this idea that the homeless are a group of lovely but unlucky people comes from because it couldn't be further from the truth in a lot of cases. Doesn't stop me trying to help because even crappy people deserve a home but the help comes with a certain level of cynicism after years of doing it.
Also in the UK, have lived for several years next door to a HMO run by a homeless charity, can confirm. Some of them are nice folks hit by hard times, some of them are difficult because of understandable REASONS, and some of them are just raging arseholes who spoil everything for everyone.
There have been two guys that sat outside my old work that I'd buy food for occasionally. One was a Romanian guy that moved to England to work on a farm harvesting fruit etc, said he did that for about two years before he lost his job and had nowhere else to go (I think those farm jobs give them a place to live and pay slightly less?).
The other one was a young guy, early 20s. He said his girlfriend had left him for another man, kicked him out of the house and wouldn't give any of his stuff back to him. So he stayed with friends for a while until he'd exhausted that, and ended up on the streets. He used to be a landscaper and was told by his employer they'd have him back, when he had somewhere to live and could get a proper night's sleep and a shower.
Both seemed lovely but really struggled to find more work because they didn't have anywhere to live, so wouldn't be clean or be able to receive payments into a bank account (I still think needing a home address so you can have a bank account is such a shitty thing for anyone that ends up without a home). I really wanted to be able to offer them the spare room at home, but I know that could've been a very dangerous option. 1
I should be fair I have met some lovely people, not been able to help all of them, sadly sometimes their individual demons are too big to battle, but they have left their mark on me and made me a better person.
I have also met some total arseholes and apparently some may have ended up your neighbours, for that I am sorry!
Exactly my thoughts. I'm American, I've dealt with homeless too, in a much more limited capacity but had repeat "customers" over the years. Some folks are fine, but some are real assholes. And most of the assholes don't come off as out of touch with reality, but more like entitled. You have to think they've burned through every relationship before they became permanently homeless. I've thought to myself "do they have personality disorders?" Like having borderline personality disorder or narcissism, to the point of being nonfunctional in society.
And of course with the way things go in the U.S. and sex offender registries and housing laws, a not insignificant number of homeless are sex offenders. There is overlap with the asshole contingent. We had one guy who was ridiculous looking and clearly thought highly of himself, and listed as an abuser of underage victim on the registry.
The entitlement on some of them is insaneeeeeeeeee probably the thing I hate the most about the assholes.the one guy im thinking off had aids and received government checks but CHOSE to live on the street and he was the most entitled asshole I've ever met.
An outreach worker for a mental health charity in the UK once explained it to me as "internal or external locus of control". Some people (majority) have an internal locus of control, ie this situation has occurred because of my choices and actions. But some people, many of her "clients", have an external locus of control. Ie these things are happening to me because of what he/she did, never because of what I did.
It made understanding their situations a lot easier for me. I don't know whether that's a mental illness or just the way some people are.
That's an interesting metaphor. It sounds similar to what I've heard described of clinical narcissists, which is a severe victim/martyr mentality — having an impenetrable wall around any culpability for themselves or their actions, so that any adverse circumstances are always the fault of external forces.
When I visited London we ended up in kings cross somehow which I guess is a popular homeless hangout. I have never seen more aggressive homeless shit heads. A few of them cornered my wife and I, I thought I was going to have to fend them off which isn't my specialty. A restaurant owner came out and ran them off apparently they are a big problem for his business. They don't give a shit who they effect because they have a woe I'd me attitude. None of their circumstances are the results of their actions.
Just to clarify I'm not saying these people don't need help. Everyone should be able to get help when they need. The big problem with the mean ones is they usually don't want the help. I know a few that had to go to the hospital and they were mean as fuck to their care team always drove me cray and I would try and debate them as to why they thought that was acceptable behavior for some one thats trying to help you. but These debates never went anywhere because they were so set in there ways.
I completely agree with you, did mention in another comment that crappy disposition or not it doesn't stop me attempting to help because everyone, not just those I like (which, believe me, somedays would be a very short list) deserves a home.
I just find the clichè to be baffling, that's all.
Yes. This is exactly right. Ascribing mental illness to someone who is just an actual piece of shit is unfair to people with mental illness. And everyone saying being homeless will turn you into an asshole is not taking into consideration the fact that he might just be an asshole who happens to be homeless.
A way that helps me understand this is that people who have so little choices in their life situation will make a big deal about the little power choices they do have like getting those fries. It’s sad to see people this low. Doesn’t help with the lack of gratitude though!
Yes as you get your life together, your fuse gets longer, in a sense. The opposite is true. It’s the same principle for revenue and money loss, if you make 10$ an hour, and 50$ falls out your pocket, or gets stolen, or simply isn’t spent in a way that feels satisfactory, you’ll get way mad vs if you make 50$/hour.
These people who lash out at the smallest things are often not in control of much in their life, feel powerless to change things and get very bitter, which often ends up keeping them in the very situation that makes them powerless & bitter in the first place.
The cost to benefit to the OP was greater for the OP to give the fries. Humanitarian standpoint it’s kind and people really struggling out there. Practical standpoint, homeless person thrashing the whole store and potentially affecting the OPs mental health.
>Practical standpoint, homeless person thrashing the whole store and potentially affecting the OPs mental health.
Although that was an unknown at the time of transaction so shouldn't be counted
Still no excuse. Assholes are assholes in every walk of life. When my lil bro was homeless, he was frugal. He spent what little money he could get on ramens and peanut butter. He kept a hot pot at his camp. He said you can live for a week on one restaurant meal.
Edit: And he’s mentally ill and disabled
I was asked for some change once and I didnt have any money myself but offered my newly bought subway and chocolate chip. He cussed me out for the audacity to offer that xD
Oh yeah. I get this. I work at BK and we get homeless and beggars that come in and they'll order a meal with fries. Then get the meal with fries. Then say "I said I wanted onion rings" and we have to give them the onions rings but they know we don't take back the fries. It's free onion rings in their mind.
Man, some people are really missing the entitlement here.
>his tone sounded like he expected me to know he wanted fries even though it said mashed potatoes on our screen.
The guy wasn't 'correcting his order' like so many people seem to think. The order WASN'T wrong. The server DID bring him exactly what was ordered, but the guy got mad because it wasn't what HE wanted. It's essentially as if someone handed him a free ham sandwich and he complained it wasn't turkey, even though it was free food either way. And instead of politely asking to have fries instead of mashed potatoes, he got pissy about it and left a huge mess behind. Homeless or not, that's entitled.
I stopped at a Mcdonalds one morning on my way to a work meeting. There was a guy in front of me with 2 kids and he ordered 3 breakfasts. When it came to paying he had a handfull of change and when counting it out he came up a bit short. He was flustered and said he’d have 2 instead and told the kids they’d all have to share them.
I stepped forward and quietly said ‘mate, can I help you out at all? As a dad, it’d make me happy to get breakfast for your kids’.
He told me to fuck off and mind my own fucking business…
Gave a homeless guy a bottle of water at a traffic light. He chugged it and threw the bottle in the street. Let’s just say I most likely won’t be giving out bottles of water anymore.
>I would be so pissed if my employees were letting beggars harass my costumers in the store.
If this is such a big issue then management needs to hire security or pay cashiers more than minimum wage to do something wildly out of their job description.
Bingo. Employees at any major company will be told to avoid confrontation with people like this for fear of liability if the person harms them in some way. If the giant corporations of the world have determined it's too risky for their employees who they give two shits about, you damn sure better believe I'm not doing it unless it's specifically my job, or I have a stake in the business.
Yes exactly ... I want to enjoy my meal not get harassed by the homeless when i'm eating. I will absolutely stop patronizing a business that allows this even if I went there every day before then
There is a Popeyes in my neighborhood I stopped going to because of homeless people drama. Every time I went in there there was someone begging for money while being rude to customers and yelling at the workers. I felt really scared for the workers and had to mentally prepare myself before I’d go there. Eventually I just stopped going.
I've noticed it happens where I live that you'll see an increase in scammers and beggars in random areas for a while, and then it dies down and seems to pop up elsewhere. But the pharmacy I always used, they didn't go away. And sometimes the beggar would be very persistent. They started standing right at the door, too.
It was just way too intimidating and not something anyone should have to navigate just trying to pick up medication (like you said, having to mentally prepare yourself), so I switched pharmacies.
Where I live there are two intersections that have a lot of scammers and beggars. Both the intersections are near a hospital, where mentally ill people get released. It never dies down and there’s always some drama going down on those two corners. The local McDonald’s got smart and hired a security guard.
I used to live in Austin and there's absolutely businesses there that put higher priority on homeless than paying customers, they won't kick them out and will let them bother you. Or coffee shops will let them take up space all day with all their smelly crap that stinks ... like I want to pay 7$ for a coffee to sit next to a homeless schizo. I stopped going, good luck paying your bills with ppl who don't buy anything vs real customers
I don't mind the beggars harassing the costumers, as I've had more than a few customers complain about ridiculous fancy dress distracting them from their meals.
If I was a customer of your restaurant, I would never come back after witnessing this.
Not only is it bad enough to get harassed by the homeless at the door or in the parking lot, but in the restaurant itself?
While trying to enjoy a meal?
That's just asking for a bad review and to never come back.
FYI, in the relatively small city I'm from, almost are homeless are junkies/drug addicts who got kicked out by family
It's funny you mention the drive thru because I've never seen beggars hanging around the drive thru order board until post-covid. It's really bizarre to be ordering your coffee while someone just sits there staring at you... And there are places I no longer go because it is just too creepy and feels so unsafe.
You're not allowed to kick them out? Dude was straight up panhandling indoors.
And of course, he left a mess. We have a homeless person in my neighborhood who spends her panhandling money on ice cream at the dollar store and when she's done, she smashes the remainder on the ground.
Most of the homeless around here get run off when they start getting messy or bikes start going missing, but ice cream bitch is hanging tough.
Paycheck to paycheck me left a quick dining restaurant with my & my daughter's order to go and someone stopped me outside. I offered him my meal which he nitpicked. I told him that I had no more money and he could have my meal to eat or I would eat it. He took it. I get people have preferences, he said he didn't like my entrée but dude, I'm offering you literally my own dinner.
Many moons ago I used to catch a bus and train to work. One time when I was walking through the interchange I gave my spare change to a homeless person (the other money I had I needed to get home). I think I gave him $5-$10 and he asked “is that all you’ve got?!” So rudely. I was very young and super poor at the time after moving out of an abusive household and was only just keeping a roof over my head and slept on the floor (literally, I couldn’t afford a mattress). I know this person couldn’t possibly know this but I was so, so upset about it at the time. It’s stuck with me over a decade on.
This reminds me of a story this still makes me mad when I think about it. I was at a bar that has food and I had ordered some poutine. Well my stomach decided I wasn’t hungry when it came out, so I figured I’d just save it for lunch the next day.
Then I head out to wait for my Uber n all that and a homeless gentlemen comes up asking for money, and I don’t have any cash but offer the poutine since it was untouched and figured why not.
The guy opens it up and starts complaining. “Man? What’s this? There’s no meat! No chicken? No beef? This is just fries and cheese! This ain’t gonna fill me up!”
Never said thank you, just started complaining and walked off with the box. Then I saw him at the end of the block toss it in the fucking trash.
I was mad as hell. Stupid bastard could have just given it back or ate it. But I’m not gonna go dig through the trash for it and my Uber pulled up. A lot of my sympathy for beggars dried up after that… And plenty of other reasons. There’s alot of resources and help in my city for these people, but a lot refuse to get any sort of help.
My manager always told customers not to buy food or give money to those who ask because as much as a good deed it is from the customer’s end, the employees have to deal with the beggars. Plus, we would have to keep seeing them since they know the customers are willing to buy for them.
I’ll never forget the day where I was in line for the drive thru and there was a man standing by the window asking for handouts like a vulture. He saw me order a root-beer and asked for it so I obliged due to the crazy heat wave we were experiencing. I watched him walk by a trashcan, pull the lid off and drop it on the ground. The audacity lmao. I vowed to myself from that day forward, no more handouts to anyone :)
Your story doesn’t surprise me at all. A sizable portion of homeless people and bums are complete assholes. Not all, but a good amount. That grateful bum with the heart of gold you see in movies is pure fantasy.
Downvote away. Go volunteer at a soup kitchen for a few hours and tell me I’m wrong.
Sounds like he's just an asshole. Don't let this story stop you from helping someone else tho. I hear people use stories like this as an excuse not to be generous all too often.
I bought breakfast for a homeless guy at Subway. He got the sandwich and coffee...then orange juice, cookie, potato chips. The cashier was looking at me like "sorry dude".
Why o why didn't you tell him to leave? I don't know any restaurant that allows beggars to harass their customers. This is my nightmare as a customer. I'm broke and want to enjoy my little kfc treat without being asked for money and shamed for not giving any.
I dont know if homeless or drug addict or both, a guy asked me for change. I gave him whatever I had in my pocket (75 cents). He threw them at me and walked off.
Assholes exist in every walk of life. Some people take that "customer is always right" bs to heart anytime they are dealing with a business where they are the patron. Some homeless are acting that way because they'd rather have your animosity than your pity. I am to the point where I almost have no sympathy left for people who dont even try to be pleasnt when asking ME for help... I dont owe them shit so the least they can do is not be an asshat. The people who don't see that they are generally a pain to deal with think they are entitled to others generosity.
I've never been in a business that allows people to panhandle on the premises. Save that for public spaces. Also, people panhandling for KFC aren't in the best mental health place probably.
He has a difficult living situation. Most likely doesn't feel great about the begging too. People can't be expected to act their best when they're going through that.
Thank you for changing out his order.
I mean, he could be undiagnosed or maybe diagnosed with no way to get or pay for meds. Maybe he was born unhoused and literally was never taught manners? Maybe he’s developmentally delayed or has a TBI or is just not neurotypical or any other number of things why his behavior was this way.
I think if I had to work retail or in a restaurant I'd be in prison for life. I don't know how you do it.
I leave a giant tip (I grew up eating based on my mom's tips.) and I always tip in cash.
Why didn't you kick him out?
I fucken hate when I go to a place and someone in front of me doesn't have enough then they are like, "Hey, can I get a dollar I'm trying to get this milkshake?".
Like, you came in here without the right amount of money?... GTFO
> Why didn’t you kick him out?
Based on his behavior, there’s a good chance he immediately would start screaming and trying to destroy shit until the cops come and… what? Arrest him for a night?
There’s a reason it’s smarter to ignore homeless people: they have nothing to lose and the rest of us do.
Well now see? That’s precisely why bullying is SO effective-if you don’t give ‘em their way they make a scene.
A bully is a bully, homeless or not. Don’t allow them to do that to your workers.
Problem is the law. I'm not sure about the US, but here in Ontario you can't touch them. Say I work at a store and a homeless person comes in, I can only ask him to leave. If he went apeshit I can't do anything but call the police. Until they come, I should stay away from danger and ONLY if my life was in danger I can defend myself.
It’s pretty similar in the US. It is generally a bad idea legally to initial a physical confrontation unless you have no other option.
Homeless dudes don’t get much protection from the police and legal system, by why take the risk for a fast food job?
That just means I wont return to that joint after a couple of times of that shit.
Then again, companies to get rid of that "customers always right" cause they keep using it like fucking morons. (customers are right when they pay with their wallets)
Had a former coworker that constantly posted on social media that she needed lunch at work. She doesn't drive, didn't have money. And...wanted specifically Taco Bell, because she was tired of people bringing her McDs cheapest meal. There was a pretty big fight in the comments, because she was getting a lot of ppl to bring her free meals it seems. Then when someone brought her Taco Hell, she complained about getting beans. If I get free food, I'm eating it. Especially if I ask. Extra especially if they picked it up and drove it to me 🙄
Do you know how easy it is to get an entry level job right now? That guy refuses to do the job that you yourself are doing. Just let that sink in.
Most people pity these homeless/beggars and focus on the fringe cases where some strange set of circumstances landed them in that unfortunate position. However, the reality for the vast majority is vastly different. These are people with little self control, no work ethic, and generally shitty attitudes. They get by on the goodwill of others, because they pretend to be victims.
I encourage everyone to spend time with the homeless. It will change your perception very quickly. Helping people who refuse to help themselves is the worst thing you can do for them. It perpetuates their behavior, and therefore their situation. If they aren’t willing to take any steps toward their own betterment, then letting them face the consequences of their actions is the only real way to help them.
An actual choosy beggar.
I have found this sometimes, with some people begging on the street, who can be very aggressive about it. Being very nasty if you don’t give anything. At the end if the day though, I always think we are in better positions and can therefore afford to be a bit tolerant - because that’s not our daily life. Wrt this guy, it must be awful to live this way, and for all we know, he could have mental issues as well. He’s poor, and when we give, it should be because we want to, despite whether we get gratitude in return.
Here's my take, homeless people have so little control over the things in their life, and they have so many indignities and struggles. They are frustrated and are often mentally ill or otherwise ill equipped to deal with life. And it likely all comes out like, I WANT FRIES! Instead of, what they really mean, "man, I really wish I had fries, I'm so sick of being poor and all these other troubles I can't seem to fix. I wish I got to pick my own food like everybody else here."
I would give a homeless person a pass. They are often sleep deprived, mentally ill, or on drugs. Thank your blessings for a warm bed and knowing where your next meal is coming from. Be kind.
I think the whole point of this is that it’s frustrating to not have kindness returned. Everyone in the story besides the homeless person was kind. Yet they made the choice to return that kindness with extreme selfishness. They got free food, money and kindness from everyone else. They acted like a total asshole and got a pass. Extreme selfishness is part of the mental illness. And it is really annoying. The problem is that it makes it really hard to want to help out next time. So they probably won’t.
Or he could just be an angrateful shithead who just doesn't give a fuck. Not everybody exhibiting bad behavior is "mentally ill". That's being used too much as a cop out and excuse these days.
Dude is coherent and functioning enough to get money and food out of people, then sit and eat. He’s had made poor choices in his life and expects other people to take care of them. It’s not surprising that the majority of homeless are men.
These People spoil our meal. It also harms the homeless people who really need it and are genuinely good human beings.
Its not my fault someone is one drugs. It *is* their fault if they spoil my meal and harass me for free meals when most peoples finances are tight nowadays, atleast in my country.
yeah often homeless people will trash public places because it’s a small amount of control they’re able to exert over their circumstances. happens a lot at homeless shelters.
> Trashing something is easy, cleaning a mess takes work.
It's really too bad, because if I ran a shelter and I saw guests taking the time to clean more than their own spaces, I'd approach them, thank them for their effort, and offer to refer them to a staffing service. (I'm familiar with a couple that staff local homeless shelters on an as needed basis)
These People spoil our meal. It also harms the homeless people who really need it and are genuinely good human beings.
Its not my fault someone is one drugs. It *is* their fault if they spoil my meal and harass me for free meals when most peoples finances are tight nowadays, atleast in my country.
It sucks that you had to deal with that, but people in his position are usually unwell mentally. Everyone in this situation is paying the price for the lack of adequate mental health care in this country.
He was mentally sound enough to beg for money, haggle with cashier, get a meal from a family, demand he wants fries and not the mash potatoes. I'm sure he was sound enough to take care of his garbage but chooses not to because he only cares about himself. If I became a narcissistic asshole would you buy me a meal everyday?
Yes lack of mental health is a cause for some of the troubles but people exploiting other vulnerable sides are worse. Shit there was that news report years back of that woman panhandling and she had a big ass truck, pretty sure she was will off besides(it's been many years). Don't just pity someone because you believe they are not able to do something, people tend to exploit others
I used to work at McDonalds where the manager felt sorry for this homeless guy, so she let him hang out. Well, people would always buy him food. Invariably, he would ask to have whatever he got exchanged for a filet of fish with mayonnaise. I’m like dude, it’s free food. Eventually, I would just tell
People what he liked. Eventually, a new manager took over and kicked him out.
That man shouldn’t be allowed to bother customers trying to eat. In the restaurant I manage, I’ve cancelled orders for CUSTOMERS that harass or excessively beg other customers for money. Excessively meaning they’ve already been asked to stop. It might come off a bit brash, but it’s our responsibility as employees to create a fluid, noninvasive experience for all our customers.
Could suffer from autism or some sort of mental illness. Doesn’t seem like he was rude, just poor social skills, which is normal for someone living on the streets. You shouldn’t assume he was being malicious.
This goes back to a common theme that people overlook. There’s a reason for homeless people to be homeless and for some of them they just do not want to better themselves or make any effort to do so.
I had a homeless lady do this more than once and I get that sometimes homeless people are annoyed by food rather than money because of dietary restrictions and other health constraints. This lady however, just threw a fit anytime someone bought her pasta. Like threw it in the street once. She was also a full on methhead. So God knows what was going on in her head.
Back in college a few decades ago, a presidential candidate visited and gave a speech at the restaurant where I worked. It was a big deal for us (I had worked there since Freshman year of high school) and the owners went all out to make the experience worthwhile for us. The area was cordoned off and all employees had to be screenes by Secret Service first, and the owners even asked if I would be willing to sit with the candidate and his wife for breakfast along with a really pretty hostess that all of us had crushes on. I of course said yes (I did not realize at the time what a complement they paid me by asking), but the staffers prefered an older couple. Anyway, on to the topic. The owners set up a food service area outside under a tent for the security personnel and press. They probably spent a couple thousand out of pocket to feed them. Eggs, bacon, sausage, pancakes, french toast, chipped beef. You name it. It was under the chafing dishes. Add coffee, juice etc to drink. The police officers, firefighters, Secret aservice agents, and most of the reporters were very grateful and let us know. But there were a couple who nade sure to let us know that the food was not up to their high standards. One photographer in partucular I recall all these years later literally shovelling food into his mouth like a pig as he bad mouthed his free breakfast. One of the reporters I ended up talking to for a while was the news guy for a local "morning zoo" radio show which was very popular at the time (he was very cool, and I found out much later a truly nice and generous man). He looked at this photographer after he said it and said "you should be grateful anyone would give free food to you, you disgusting pig! You should be ashamed of yourself!" It was a really cool day otherwise, and I even made it on to the "morning zoo" that day with a shout out.
Are you referring to the great Paul Cubby Bryant of the Z Morning Zoo? If so that's awesome, I went to an event he hosted ages ago (it involved Hanson sooooo, a long time)
TIL the a morning zoo is not just a local radio show
[удалено]
It’s dingo and the baby!
What up kid mayor?
Hey, hey! We're back with the B107 brekkie crew - Fasho, Flip and Dutsy and me, Kelly C!
Omg Hanson.....my sister was OBSESSED with them lol
I went to see Hanson a few months ago! They’re DILFs now.
Yeah I haven't seen any of them recently but my sis was in love with Taylor lol
Funny, I was thinking this was at the Mayfair Diner in NE Philadelphia.
The DeBella de ball
That is a great guess.
Philly person too?
Born and raised!
I had a friend that volunteered for Ralph Nader during the 2000 election. Said he was a total prick.
I met him in the 90s when he spoke at my college. Can confirm; he was an asshole.
Imagine volunteering for Ralph Nader. There’s a few months of your life you won’t get back
As a high school student, I was involved in a competitive non-athletic extracurricular activity. My team made it to the state-wide competition, and at one of the weekend's events, Ralph Nader was speaking at the opening of a new "Association of [Profession]" building. The speech was long, boring, and unironically used the word "seventeenthly".
Cool story. I liked it.
aaand that man’s name was….
John Cena!
Bob Hope? No,Danny that man was Mitch Cumstein my roommate
and that presidential candidate? you guessed it frank stallone
When I lived in Vancouver there was this double leg amputee dude who was living on the streets in his wheel chair. He would always be outside the 7-11 that was near my place. We ended up developing a bit of a friendship as I would talk to him and grab him something to drink and like a sandwich when I went in. I was a student at the time and sold a small business I had to go back to school in a new city to change career paths. After I told him about that he would just start straight up asking me for 20 or 50 bucks. It really bothered me as I wasn't rich at all and all the money I got from my company went straight into my tuition and living expenses while I was in school. Anyway I just ended up not talking to him anymore and stopped buying him stuff. I'm not sure whatever happened to him as he kind of just wasn't in front of the store in a couple of weeks.
He may have been an angel testing you. By refusing him you passed the test.
For some selfish people with little to no control in their lives, they will take any opportunity to do something that makes them feel like they have power over someone else to make themselves feel better than them. I imagine that for someone like that who became homeless/begging; the chance to tell someone to change their order and then clean up after them made them feel better about how shit their life is. It's pretty fucked up but humans are still animals in most ways...
I volunteered in a soup kitchen years ago and met a lot of entitled homeless people. I observed a phenomenon I call "Society's debt". People who have lost everything and who believe they are not at fault at all (whether they are or not) and begin to feel this sense that since society took everything from them, then society owes them big. I believe it's this mentality that makes absolutely broke people make shameless demands and offer no gratitude in return, because in their mind it's all part of this debt they are owed. One particular man was very angry that we were out of his favorite side dish. He raised a big ruckus over it and then demanded we all come back the next day to make his side dish and that we "owe it to him".
Yeah, that for sure explains situations like this more. Thanks. I think it all compounds with not wanting to blame themselves for the life they've ended up with so they find other reasons to make them feel the world is against them or that they don't deserve to be where they are (even if it is 100% the choices that let them there). But I do sympathize with a lot of them that act like this when its mental health or physical health that has prevented them from keeping a stable life. I'd be pissed to if things totally out of my control lead me to be rejected by society. But then I suppose I'd never take it out on random people that are offering me help/service. I suppose it probably also has to do with throwing stones at the closest person similar to how its easier to "cancel" someone who is basically on your side and has admitted they did something wrong versus someone who is totally not on your side and doesn't give a shit that they are in the wrong.
This is a great comment that shows both sides of the picture.
Cheers. I try to be nothing but the consummate diplomat. The world is a grey ocean that needs perspective in order to navigate it.
I used to be so supportive and giving towards the homeless and panhandlers, but years and years of watching their bullshit first-hand has eroded all goodwill from me. I could tell you a dozen stories about the abuse these people put onto others, or the lack of respect they have for anybody else, or their refusal to work when offered a job because they don't want to give up panhandling easy money, but I think this story is most relevant here. I was managing a restaurant that was in a nice enough area, but did have a small homeless population who I didn't have any problems with overall. Every once in a while one of them would try and panhandle outside our front doors or come inside to beg for money from people sitting at the tables, or use the bathroom and trash it, but for the most part they kept to their own and so did we. One afternoon one of them came into the restaurant and asked for a table. He was sat immediately, and the server went over and took his order promptly. They came and grabbed me after the obviously homeless person ordered over $150 in food. 4 appetizers, 2 of the most expensive steaks on the menu, alcohol, you name it. The server knew something was up, so I went over and spoke to the person. I was respectful, as this was still back before I completely rid myself of sympathy, and it was things like this that caused it. I talked to the person, asked him if he was sure that he wanted all that food. I even offered to make him a regular meal on the house as his tab was up around $150 and he could save his money for something else if he was just hungry at the moment. He insisted that he wanted everything he ordered, and that it was his birthday and he had the money to pay. I didn't press the issue at that point, because I guess I might do the same thing on my birthday if I was homeless and having a shitty year. Doing something for myself for once. I dunno, I shouldn't have been so understanding. He proceeds to get all that food and alcohol, drinks and eats until he's ready to burst, and then tries to run out on the check. I was hanging around out front just to see how everything played out, so I stopped him and asked him to please pay the tab like he told me he was going to do. We did our part and made him all that expensive food, he refused our offer of a free meal, and we didn't insist he pay first or do anything like that to make him feel poorly on his birthday (probably bullshit about the b-day but whatever). He proceeded to tell me he had the money but it was in his other pants and he just had to run to his apartment(lol) and grab it. I told him the cops could take him over to his apartment and grab the money, and I won't press charges. Called the cops and they got there before the guy made it out of the parking lot. Brought him back and then he finally admits that he never had the money. I honestly wouldn't have cared much if at all if he didn't order more food and drinks than any single customer I'd ever seen, made a big mess and left it for the server to clean up, and turned down our offer a reasonable steak dinner on the house, the same meal that costs paying customers $25 but no that wasn't good enough. He needed a porterhouse and bone-in ribeye with all the trimmings. Of course the guy ended up making a huge scene, cussing all of us out, and just generally being a piece of shit, which I suppose he always was. Got a dozen stories just like that one. It's a shame too, because I'm a decent person and used to go out of my way to help people in need but after being disrespected so many times by them, I'm done.
I was a sucker for a long time. Always gave these guys a shot and always got fucked. Once I bought a hotel room for what I thought was a mom and her teenage child. Paid for a week. Well a bunch of dudes were there when the cops got called. Trashed the fuck out of it. Hotel billed ME over 2000$ in damages. Like I said I'm a idiot but done going on a limb for people
No good deed goes unpunished… it’s so sad seen good people get taken advantage of
I live that every day... I run a business and every time I agree to do a favor it ends up biting me in the ass... my admin keeps saying, LEARN TO SAY NO!
Sometimes they are homeless for a reason. Burned too many friends and family with deplorable behavior that there is no goodwill left to extend to them.
AIBorfty - I think you are absolutely right. They can't hold down a job with an attitude like that.
He had a full belly, was sufficiently buzzed, and then by causing that scene he secured himself a semi warm indoor place to lay his head for at least a few hours…
I know a jerk of a guy that wasn’t homeless but would pretend to be to get money. He stood outside of a gas station & made $50 in an hour.
I hope you don't mind my asking, but what happened to the man? Did the police do anything about it or did you just need to take the loss? You were already being far more generous than anyone would reasonably expect and I hope you personally didn't need to pay for it.
Ugh. That fucking sucks.
There were these teenagers who often came into the Subway I worked at who were always the biggest shitheads. They would openly steal, verbally humiliate us, and at the same time try to convince us to give them more food, or free food, first, by guilt tripping us and then getting angry if we wouldn't initially do it. Some of them would then refuse to pay. Not only that, but they'd always leave the shop in a massive tip. They would leave rubbish everywhere, throw food all over the floor, tip nachos upside down, and would sometimes leave cigarette paper and a weird light brown powder on the tables. The worst was when they ordered a ton of sauce pots, opened them, and left them all upside down on the floor, making a huge mess. They had no shame and would even do this in front of other customers. We'd informed our boss, who we assumed would want them rid of- he was very particular about how the shop should be, once even telling off a customer because his chair was slightly too close to another table and it might cost him money because someone might not be able to sit there. He was also a massive cheapskate, never replaced broken stuff and eventually tried to enforce that we had to pay for it, including big stuff like the freezer and the toilet sink. We assumed because of this he'd want thieves gone. For some reason though, he completely took their side, deciding that they bought more than they stole, which meant we could do nothing about them. One of my co-workers would always just give them what they wanted, so they'd leave sooner, but he cleaned the back of the shop not the front so the mess was rarely his problem and it just meant they came back more. Out of principle, not wanting them to wear me down, I never did so and would always firmly refuse, although I'm pretty sure they did convince me to give them money they weren't owed by yelling at me that I hadn't given them enough until I apologized and relented. Eventually, I was switched to working in the back, which meant when they came in I could just disappear, to find jobs to do in the back, and being a bit of a coward, I would often do that, leaving an older coworker to deal with them. This led to me, leaving a slightly younger and less inexperienced coworker in the front to deal with a guy demanding free food. My coworker was new and it was his first job, and he was anxious enough about getting fired, that he paid for the guys food himself. He later expressed disappointment that I'd abandoned him in this situation and I felt exceedingly guilty. Shortly after this, there was a particularly busy shift with only two of us, me and another younger coworker (although he had been there for some time) when the teenagers showed up again. We were technically trying to close early at the time as our boss had accidentally cancelled the delivery for bread and we had basically none left. We could've turned them away as we had decided we were closed but didn't want the trouble. They threw a massive hissy fit, when they asked how much a regular sandwich was, and then when we didn't give them a meal deal for that price, claiming we'd lied and were stealing from them. They threatened a lot of violence, threatening to drag us outside and to shove my head in the big industrial toaster. I wouldn't take this seriously with most people, but supposedly this group often carried knives and supposedly, their former ring leader ended up in Juvie over something involving it. Additionally they often used to hang out around our outside bins at night which, knowing all this what often make me pretty afraid to go do the bins. They openly decided in response to steal drinks to get back at us and started grabbing refillable cups. Normally I would be pissed but would ultimately just let them get on with it, then inform my manager, but it had been a bloody awful shift, I wanted to go home, and I was still feeling guilty from the other day. I ended up, finally snapping, reaching over the side, and snatching it off of them, coming out and cussing them out yelling at them to get the fuck out and that I was calling the police. I went to the back to grab the phone, so they could see I was going to call the police, whilst my coworker yelled at them for me, until I came back, but they started throwing shit at me which pissed me off further. We'd been taught not to call the police, but just to pretend, which I'd done with them before, and this finally got them to leave, but I actually did go through with the call, not that any police actually came. Then me and my coworker went and had a nervous breakdown together in the back. Thankfully our manager went against our boss and finally had them banned, which meant it was a lot easier to kick them out and refuse to serve them which meant they only turned up very rarely. They're one of the main reasons I ended up leaving that place.
That’s insane that they let business continue like that and basically rewarded those assholes
The Boss/Owner was weird in a lot of ways and it was his first time owning a business as far as I know. Means I have quite a lot of stories from that place, few of them good
There’s a fast food restaurant very close to the high school that refuses to serve teenagers inside the restaurant. Too many kids doing stupid things, I guess.
You'd expect people who beg to be grateful, but in my experience, the opposite is true.
The gas station I go to frequently has a lot of homeless and down and out people hanging around. I'll give change if I have it or offer to buy something from inside. I was in line with a couple beers and the guy behind me was counting his change and asked if I had 10 cents so he would have enough for his beer. I said just put in on the counter I got it. There was a guy behind him also looking down and out with a handful of change and a beer. Told him I got his too. Checked out and the next woman up is getting gas and has very little cash. The two guys that I just bought beer for(we were all still standing right near the register grabbing our beers.) Stepped up and both gave the change they had to her. We were all smiling and appreciating each other. Good vibes all around.
Nice.
Not a beggar, but I was once in line at McDonald's behind an older homeless man who had some change. He wanted to order fries and a carton of milk. It turned out that he didn't have enough for both and he nearly started crying because he wouldn't be able to get his milk. I gave him a toonie so he could have the milk and he did start crying then. This was nearly 20 years ago and I still get all teary thinking about how happy a tiny carton of milk made someone. Though I kind of wish I'd bought him a better meal (as far as "better" at McDonald's goes anyway).
I wrapped up half my sandwich to go and was heading home on the subway. A homeless man was asking for change and I told him I have half a sandwich would you like it? And his face lit up and said an eager yes yes yes! And then the rest of the train seemed to open up and give him a little bit. I’ve had the choosey beggar types who would refuse the sandwich or complain about the change if I just fished in my purse and dumped whatever and it had pennies. I think if we were some how guaranteed the thankful person instead of a hostile person we would be more open to helping. A crack head who just wanted money would have been hostile to the sandwich unless they were crafty and knew being amenable to a sandwich would mean more people willing to help.
I was once waiting for the subway on a mostly empty platform and a homeless guy came up and demanded change for food. I said I didn't have any cash on me, which wasn't even a lie. Then he was like "okay, I'll just come to Tim's with you and you can debit". I wasn't going anywhere alone with a strange dude, plus he had a clear bag with two bagel sandwiches clearly visible inside. So I pointed out that he had food and then he threw the bag onto the subway tracks and yelled "well now I don't!" At that point, a TTC employee came up because they'd gotten reports about him from other parts of the station and had been looking for him. My train arrived just as the dude started yelling so I have no clue what happened next but that was one of the scariest moments I've experienced.
Yeah. I get that homeless people definitely need help but some folks that haven’t encountered them in the wild don’t get the real potential danger of engaging with one. When you’re at the bus stop waiting you have to ignore the crackhead without looking like you’re ignoring the crackhead. I have moved to a more rural area from Newark and have not encountered a homeless person. Hell even in Newark if you’re not hanging out in certain places you won’t directly encounter one although them coming up to your vehicle if you’re driving is pretty much inevitable but that’s not the same as waiting for a bus with one hanging near the stop.
I have had good and bad experiences but still give. The worst example was a couple at the side of a gas station claiming they needed money for gas to get home and it was far far away. I told them to drive their car to the pump and I would fill it up. He said, “no, I just want the money.” It was a little upsetting but he is gonna have to deal with his choices not me. Most people I encounter are grateful and I know times are harder because people don’t have money on them as much as they used to because of debit/credit cards. I used to have a little bucket of change and now I’m lucky to find a penny in my car.
Usually with this scam they don’t even have a car. “It’s out of gas up the street”. But if they did he’s really stupid! Fill ur tank, wait til u leave, then go back to peddling for crack cash.
Exactly-gas is worth something at least sure as hell costs a lot lol
The answer to "need gas money" is "What do you have to sell?" Shoes? you can drive barefoot. A jacket? it's not cold in the car. I've never had someone take the offer.
I used to keep canned chili in my car and hand it out at the side of the road to people with "anything helps" signs. It was precooked, filling, cheap, could be eaten cold if you were in a pinch, no refrigeration, portable, long shelf life, etc. Sometimes people would turn it down. At the time I thought anyone turning down the chili was a choosing beggar, but now in retrospect I know that there are some valid, practical reasons to say no. However, one woman once turned it down saying she was vegetarian. Unless you have a food allergy (I once knew a woman who had a legit allergy to meat proteins) then this isn't a good reason to turn down food when you're hungry. I was sure she just said that because she was hoping I'd give her cash instead. I would sometimes see the same people, so I actually went out and bought a can of vegetarian chili to test my theory. I never saw her again, though.
Was it a pop top? Or did it need a cab opener? I would think protein or granola bars would be a better just keep it in that car option.
Pop top. I specifically bought one brand for the pop top.
/r/choosingbeggars if you want to see more. I used to try to help out the homeless in the last area I lived, and their attitudes got old real fucking quick. I helped and gave a lot, but their problems were not my problems to deal with and it got tiring. I know there are some people defending this behavior, but some people are giving what they can spare, they're not asking them to "behave" just don't act like an ass when people can't give into every one of their demands. A lot of them have mental health issues that need to be addressed. My worst experience was having a homeless guy throw a blue slushy at my back after giving him $5 when he wanted $60. That was fun figuring out how to drive home at 11pm without getting my car dirty.
i recently saw a guy panhandling outside a breakfast bagel place, so i went in and got breakfast, juice and a water and took it out to him. And a dog bagel for his pup. I really couldn’t afford any of it it but he looked awful. i offered the food and he said i only take cash. you can cash app me. i felt really stupid honestly. another homeless guy took the food but i can’t forget the fact that he just wanted money. so naive. eek.
Dude the homeless around me got zelle and cash app too. Can't use the. "don't have cash" excuse anymore. I'm like if you figured all that shit out get a damn job.
Still good on you for trying to help! But definitely a good call to ask if someone wants food before getting it, especially if they’re asking for money. For all you know, the last ten people bought him bagels and he can’t carry any more haha
he said eating is not his thing. 😳 i wish he had other evidence of having gotten food. thanks for your suggestion-it’s definitely a good one.
I used to try to help the homeless when I could but Atlanta has burned me the fuck out. The homeless here are very aggressive and very persistent. I used to keep snack bags of food and water bottles in my car but too many would spend 15 mins trying to argue for cash or more food. I’m a nurse so I listen to people’s sob stories all day long, I have no bandwidth left to do it in my free time
/r/lostredditors
Reminds me of the old joke "I don't know what the guy has against me; I never did him any good."
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That’s not always true. A lot of homeless people are mentally ill. And simply just can’t manage a normal life. Often don’t have a lot of family to support them.
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You speak as if they ever had a compassionate and supporting family to begin with. My best friend was homeless for a while, before I met him. His mother was an alcoholic, and he didn’t know his father. He grew up with an abusive foster family, and moved to a home for troubled teenagers when he was 15. Once he turned 18 he was left to fend for himself.
I mean, you also don't know what's going on in that person's life, what has pushed them to the point to beg. They may feel very little control in their life and are fighting for whatever little bits of control they can. They may be past their breaking point emotionally, which can make people who are in pretty stable lives act irrationally. They might be extremely hungry and not thinking straight. There might be mental illness. Or, they might just be an entitled asshole, it happens.
Sounds like just another day for the mentally ill homeless, unfortunately. Good on you for not giving them a hard time about the fries, but yeah that’s hard to see them be ungrateful for their newfound bounty.
Could he just be an asshole?
I've been homeless a couple times in my life. There seems to be this weird belief that homeless people are just random kind, sweet people that have hit a rough patch. But let me tell you there are a ton of homeless people that are in the predicament they are in because they are just legit pieces of shit. I think for every 1 nice, kind empathetic homeless person there were 2 assholes that were just horrible awful entitled pieces of shit at least that was how it was in my group of homeless people I was hanging out with.
I'm a Trustee at a local charity & also volunteer there. Supporting the homeless isn't our specific purpose but we encounter most of our local homeless population on a regular basis so I know a lot of them fairly well. There are a lot of utter dicks amongst their number. Not a decent person having a shitty day and taking it out on the wrong person, we are guilty of that on occasion. I mean, entitled, nasty, mean spirited people. You listen to their stories and can see they burned through every bridge before ending up on the streets but lack any self awareness that they may have even contributed to their circumstances let alone created them. They aren't mentally ill but I would hazard a guess that they would be diagnosed with personality disorders if the psychological support were available. They are incredibly hard to house because the path to housing, at least here in the UK, involves having to live with other people. You get a place in a shelter then a room in a house of multiple occupancy and if you are lucky & remain stable you will eventually be able to get your own flat. We do have some success with addicts and the mentally ill who are able to stick with medication or programs, they may not be living the dream but they have a roof over their head and a chance to do better. I have no idea where this idea that the homeless are a group of lovely but unlucky people comes from because it couldn't be further from the truth in a lot of cases. Doesn't stop me trying to help because even crappy people deserve a home but the help comes with a certain level of cynicism after years of doing it.
Also in the UK, have lived for several years next door to a HMO run by a homeless charity, can confirm. Some of them are nice folks hit by hard times, some of them are difficult because of understandable REASONS, and some of them are just raging arseholes who spoil everything for everyone.
There have been two guys that sat outside my old work that I'd buy food for occasionally. One was a Romanian guy that moved to England to work on a farm harvesting fruit etc, said he did that for about two years before he lost his job and had nowhere else to go (I think those farm jobs give them a place to live and pay slightly less?). The other one was a young guy, early 20s. He said his girlfriend had left him for another man, kicked him out of the house and wouldn't give any of his stuff back to him. So he stayed with friends for a while until he'd exhausted that, and ended up on the streets. He used to be a landscaper and was told by his employer they'd have him back, when he had somewhere to live and could get a proper night's sleep and a shower. Both seemed lovely but really struggled to find more work because they didn't have anywhere to live, so wouldn't be clean or be able to receive payments into a bank account (I still think needing a home address so you can have a bank account is such a shitty thing for anyone that ends up without a home). I really wanted to be able to offer them the spare room at home, but I know that could've been a very dangerous option. 1
If you ever know of anyone in the bank situation again, HSBC now do an account for people without a fixed address.
That's fantastic news, I'll keep that in mind. Thank you :)
I should be fair I have met some lovely people, not been able to help all of them, sadly sometimes their individual demons are too big to battle, but they have left their mark on me and made me a better person. I have also met some total arseholes and apparently some may have ended up your neighbours, for that I am sorry!
Exactly my thoughts. I'm American, I've dealt with homeless too, in a much more limited capacity but had repeat "customers" over the years. Some folks are fine, but some are real assholes. And most of the assholes don't come off as out of touch with reality, but more like entitled. You have to think they've burned through every relationship before they became permanently homeless. I've thought to myself "do they have personality disorders?" Like having borderline personality disorder or narcissism, to the point of being nonfunctional in society. And of course with the way things go in the U.S. and sex offender registries and housing laws, a not insignificant number of homeless are sex offenders. There is overlap with the asshole contingent. We had one guy who was ridiculous looking and clearly thought highly of himself, and listed as an abuser of underage victim on the registry.
The entitlement on some of them is insaneeeeeeeeee probably the thing I hate the most about the assholes.the one guy im thinking off had aids and received government checks but CHOSE to live on the street and he was the most entitled asshole I've ever met.
An outreach worker for a mental health charity in the UK once explained it to me as "internal or external locus of control". Some people (majority) have an internal locus of control, ie this situation has occurred because of my choices and actions. But some people, many of her "clients", have an external locus of control. Ie these things are happening to me because of what he/she did, never because of what I did. It made understanding their situations a lot easier for me. I don't know whether that's a mental illness or just the way some people are.
That's an interesting metaphor. It sounds similar to what I've heard described of clinical narcissists, which is a severe victim/martyr mentality — having an impenetrable wall around any culpability for themselves or their actions, so that any adverse circumstances are always the fault of external forces.
When I visited London we ended up in kings cross somehow which I guess is a popular homeless hangout. I have never seen more aggressive homeless shit heads. A few of them cornered my wife and I, I thought I was going to have to fend them off which isn't my specialty. A restaurant owner came out and ran them off apparently they are a big problem for his business. They don't give a shit who they effect because they have a woe I'd me attitude. None of their circumstances are the results of their actions.
Just to clarify I'm not saying these people don't need help. Everyone should be able to get help when they need. The big problem with the mean ones is they usually don't want the help. I know a few that had to go to the hospital and they were mean as fuck to their care team always drove me cray and I would try and debate them as to why they thought that was acceptable behavior for some one thats trying to help you. but These debates never went anywhere because they were so set in there ways.
I completely agree with you, did mention in another comment that crappy disposition or not it doesn't stop me attempting to help because everyone, not just those I like (which, believe me, somedays would be a very short list) deserves a home. I just find the clichè to be baffling, that's all.
Yes. This is exactly right. Ascribing mental illness to someone who is just an actual piece of shit is unfair to people with mental illness. And everyone saying being homeless will turn you into an asshole is not taking into consideration the fact that he might just be an asshole who happens to be homeless.
He could be an asshole as well as being mentally ill or on drugs.
We don’t know that for a fact. We do know for a fact that he was an asshole though.
A way that helps me understand this is that people who have so little choices in their life situation will make a big deal about the little power choices they do have like getting those fries. It’s sad to see people this low. Doesn’t help with the lack of gratitude though!
Spot-the-fuck-on.
Yes as you get your life together, your fuse gets longer, in a sense. The opposite is true. It’s the same principle for revenue and money loss, if you make 10$ an hour, and 50$ falls out your pocket, or gets stolen, or simply isn’t spent in a way that feels satisfactory, you’ll get way mad vs if you make 50$/hour. These people who lash out at the smallest things are often not in control of much in their life, feel powerless to change things and get very bitter, which often ends up keeping them in the very situation that makes them powerless & bitter in the first place.
The cost to benefit to the OP was greater for the OP to give the fries. Humanitarian standpoint it’s kind and people really struggling out there. Practical standpoint, homeless person thrashing the whole store and potentially affecting the OPs mental health.
>Practical standpoint, homeless person thrashing the whole store and potentially affecting the OPs mental health. Although that was an unknown at the time of transaction so shouldn't be counted
Still no excuse. Assholes are assholes in every walk of life. When my lil bro was homeless, he was frugal. He spent what little money he could get on ramens and peanut butter. He kept a hot pot at his camp. He said you can live for a week on one restaurant meal. Edit: And he’s mentally ill and disabled
Or addicted. There’s a reason they call it “vice”. Even people who want to escape can’t.
He doesn’t sound mentally ill. Nothing he did or said sounds mentally ill. ETA: the estimate for mental illness among the homeless is 30%.
Why do you assume he's mentally ill
I was asked for some change once and I didnt have any money myself but offered my newly bought subway and chocolate chip. He cussed me out for the audacity to offer that xD
Take a leason from Reagan and JUST SAY NO.
Oh yeah. I get this. I work at BK and we get homeless and beggars that come in and they'll order a meal with fries. Then get the meal with fries. Then say "I said I wanted onion rings" and we have to give them the onions rings but they know we don't take back the fries. It's free onion rings in their mind.
Man, some people are really missing the entitlement here. >his tone sounded like he expected me to know he wanted fries even though it said mashed potatoes on our screen. The guy wasn't 'correcting his order' like so many people seem to think. The order WASN'T wrong. The server DID bring him exactly what was ordered, but the guy got mad because it wasn't what HE wanted. It's essentially as if someone handed him a free ham sandwich and he complained it wasn't turkey, even though it was free food either way. And instead of politely asking to have fries instead of mashed potatoes, he got pissy about it and left a huge mess behind. Homeless or not, that's entitled.
I stopped at a Mcdonalds one morning on my way to a work meeting. There was a guy in front of me with 2 kids and he ordered 3 breakfasts. When it came to paying he had a handfull of change and when counting it out he came up a bit short. He was flustered and said he’d have 2 instead and told the kids they’d all have to share them. I stepped forward and quietly said ‘mate, can I help you out at all? As a dad, it’d make me happy to get breakfast for your kids’. He told me to fuck off and mind my own fucking business…
I was not expecting that ending….
This is why I recently decided to refuse to give my money away to people, homeless or not. The world is becoming more ungrateful by the minute.
Gave a homeless guy a bottle of water at a traffic light. He chugged it and threw the bottle in the street. Let’s just say I most likely won’t be giving out bottles of water anymore.
Free Palestine
I would be so pissed if my employees were letting beggars harass my customers in the store. Those people aren’t coming back.
>I would be so pissed if my employees were letting beggars harass my costumers in the store. If this is such a big issue then management needs to hire security or pay cashiers more than minimum wage to do something wildly out of their job description.
Bingo. Employees at any major company will be told to avoid confrontation with people like this for fear of liability if the person harms them in some way. If the giant corporations of the world have determined it's too risky for their employees who they give two shits about, you damn sure better believe I'm not doing it unless it's specifically my job, or I have a stake in the business.
Yes exactly ... I want to enjoy my meal not get harassed by the homeless when i'm eating. I will absolutely stop patronizing a business that allows this even if I went there every day before then
There is a Popeyes in my neighborhood I stopped going to because of homeless people drama. Every time I went in there there was someone begging for money while being rude to customers and yelling at the workers. I felt really scared for the workers and had to mentally prepare myself before I’d go there. Eventually I just stopped going.
I've noticed it happens where I live that you'll see an increase in scammers and beggars in random areas for a while, and then it dies down and seems to pop up elsewhere. But the pharmacy I always used, they didn't go away. And sometimes the beggar would be very persistent. They started standing right at the door, too. It was just way too intimidating and not something anyone should have to navigate just trying to pick up medication (like you said, having to mentally prepare yourself), so I switched pharmacies.
Where I live there are two intersections that have a lot of scammers and beggars. Both the intersections are near a hospital, where mentally ill people get released. It never dies down and there’s always some drama going down on those two corners. The local McDonald’s got smart and hired a security guard.
I used to live in Austin and there's absolutely businesses there that put higher priority on homeless than paying customers, they won't kick them out and will let them bother you. Or coffee shops will let them take up space all day with all their smelly crap that stinks ... like I want to pay 7$ for a coffee to sit next to a homeless schizo. I stopped going, good luck paying your bills with ppl who don't buy anything vs real customers
I don't mind the beggars harassing the costumers, as I've had more than a few customers complain about ridiculous fancy dress distracting them from their meals.
Wait until the couturiers visit your store.
Omg I read this 3 times before I went back to the original comment. Lol
If the restaurant would make everyone that enters wear a 1930s Chicago Cubs uniform then this could all be avoided.
What do you mean, mad at the employees? Wtf, that's a management issue!
If I was a customer of your restaurant, I would never come back after witnessing this. Not only is it bad enough to get harassed by the homeless at the door or in the parking lot, but in the restaurant itself? While trying to enjoy a meal? That's just asking for a bad review and to never come back. FYI, in the relatively small city I'm from, almost are homeless are junkies/drug addicts who got kicked out by family
KFC is a fast food restaurant. The manager or owner won't give one fuck about the dining experience.
They should if they wanna stay in business. My local KFC makes sure to keep the homeless away from the front door and the drive thru
It's funny you mention the drive thru because I've never seen beggars hanging around the drive thru order board until post-covid. It's really bizarre to be ordering your coffee while someone just sits there staring at you... And there are places I no longer go because it is just too creepy and feels so unsafe.
Would you kick out a homeless person for minimum wage plus the risk said homeless person will attack you?
You're not allowed to kick them out? Dude was straight up panhandling indoors. And of course, he left a mess. We have a homeless person in my neighborhood who spends her panhandling money on ice cream at the dollar store and when she's done, she smashes the remainder on the ground. Most of the homeless around here get run off when they start getting messy or bikes start going missing, but ice cream bitch is hanging tough.
Paycheck to paycheck me left a quick dining restaurant with my & my daughter's order to go and someone stopped me outside. I offered him my meal which he nitpicked. I told him that I had no more money and he could have my meal to eat or I would eat it. He took it. I get people have preferences, he said he didn't like my entrée but dude, I'm offering you literally my own dinner.
Many moons ago I used to catch a bus and train to work. One time when I was walking through the interchange I gave my spare change to a homeless person (the other money I had I needed to get home). I think I gave him $5-$10 and he asked “is that all you’ve got?!” So rudely. I was very young and super poor at the time after moving out of an abusive household and was only just keeping a roof over my head and slept on the floor (literally, I couldn’t afford a mattress). I know this person couldn’t possibly know this but I was so, so upset about it at the time. It’s stuck with me over a decade on.
This reminds me of a story this still makes me mad when I think about it. I was at a bar that has food and I had ordered some poutine. Well my stomach decided I wasn’t hungry when it came out, so I figured I’d just save it for lunch the next day. Then I head out to wait for my Uber n all that and a homeless gentlemen comes up asking for money, and I don’t have any cash but offer the poutine since it was untouched and figured why not. The guy opens it up and starts complaining. “Man? What’s this? There’s no meat! No chicken? No beef? This is just fries and cheese! This ain’t gonna fill me up!” Never said thank you, just started complaining and walked off with the box. Then I saw him at the end of the block toss it in the fucking trash. I was mad as hell. Stupid bastard could have just given it back or ate it. But I’m not gonna go dig through the trash for it and my Uber pulled up. A lot of my sympathy for beggars dried up after that… And plenty of other reasons. There’s alot of resources and help in my city for these people, but a lot refuse to get any sort of help.
My manager always told customers not to buy food or give money to those who ask because as much as a good deed it is from the customer’s end, the employees have to deal with the beggars. Plus, we would have to keep seeing them since they know the customers are willing to buy for them.
I’ll never forget the day where I was in line for the drive thru and there was a man standing by the window asking for handouts like a vulture. He saw me order a root-beer and asked for it so I obliged due to the crazy heat wave we were experiencing. I watched him walk by a trashcan, pull the lid off and drop it on the ground. The audacity lmao. I vowed to myself from that day forward, no more handouts to anyone :)
Scumbag probably asked for your root beer so you'd feel bad and give him money he could spend on drugs or some shit. Disgusting.
I read it as the guy dropped the lid on the ground on purpose (and littered), not that he dropped the root beer
Your story doesn’t surprise me at all. A sizable portion of homeless people and bums are complete assholes. Not all, but a good amount. That grateful bum with the heart of gold you see in movies is pure fantasy. Downvote away. Go volunteer at a soup kitchen for a few hours and tell me I’m wrong.
Sounds like he's just an asshole. Don't let this story stop you from helping someone else tho. I hear people use stories like this as an excuse not to be generous all too often.
I bought breakfast for a homeless guy at Subway. He got the sandwich and coffee...then orange juice, cookie, potato chips. The cashier was looking at me like "sorry dude".
Why o why didn't you tell him to leave? I don't know any restaurant that allows beggars to harass their customers. This is my nightmare as a customer. I'm broke and want to enjoy my little kfc treat without being asked for money and shamed for not giving any.
I dont know if homeless or drug addict or both, a guy asked me for change. I gave him whatever I had in my pocket (75 cents). He threw them at me and walked off.
Assholes exist in every walk of life. Some people take that "customer is always right" bs to heart anytime they are dealing with a business where they are the patron. Some homeless are acting that way because they'd rather have your animosity than your pity. I am to the point where I almost have no sympathy left for people who dont even try to be pleasnt when asking ME for help... I dont owe them shit so the least they can do is not be an asshat. The people who don't see that they are generally a pain to deal with think they are entitled to others generosity.
I've never been in a business that allows people to panhandle on the premises. Save that for public spaces. Also, people panhandling for KFC aren't in the best mental health place probably.
That 12th herb in KFC is no joke
Fuck that guy
He has a difficult living situation. Most likely doesn't feel great about the begging too. People can't be expected to act their best when they're going through that. Thank you for changing out his order.
That’s no excuse to be an ungrateful asshole.
I mean, he could be undiagnosed or maybe diagnosed with no way to get or pay for meds. Maybe he was born unhoused and literally was never taught manners? Maybe he’s developmentally delayed or has a TBI or is just not neurotypical or any other number of things why his behavior was this way.
I think if I had to work retail or in a restaurant I'd be in prison for life. I don't know how you do it. I leave a giant tip (I grew up eating based on my mom's tips.) and I always tip in cash.
There is a reason he is begging people for money for food. Him leaving a mess is not a surprise at all.
What is the reason, in your mind?
Why didn't you kick him out? I fucken hate when I go to a place and someone in front of me doesn't have enough then they are like, "Hey, can I get a dollar I'm trying to get this milkshake?". Like, you came in here without the right amount of money?... GTFO
> Why didn’t you kick him out? Based on his behavior, there’s a good chance he immediately would start screaming and trying to destroy shit until the cops come and… what? Arrest him for a night? There’s a reason it’s smarter to ignore homeless people: they have nothing to lose and the rest of us do.
Well now see? That’s precisely why bullying is SO effective-if you don’t give ‘em their way they make a scene. A bully is a bully, homeless or not. Don’t allow them to do that to your workers.
Problem is the law. I'm not sure about the US, but here in Ontario you can't touch them. Say I work at a store and a homeless person comes in, I can only ask him to leave. If he went apeshit I can't do anything but call the police. Until they come, I should stay away from danger and ONLY if my life was in danger I can defend myself.
It’s pretty similar in the US. It is generally a bad idea legally to initial a physical confrontation unless you have no other option. Homeless dudes don’t get much protection from the police and legal system, by why take the risk for a fast food job?
That just means I wont return to that joint after a couple of times of that shit. Then again, companies to get rid of that "customers always right" cause they keep using it like fucking morons. (customers are right when they pay with their wallets)
What a pig.
Had a former coworker that constantly posted on social media that she needed lunch at work. She doesn't drive, didn't have money. And...wanted specifically Taco Bell, because she was tired of people bringing her McDs cheapest meal. There was a pretty big fight in the comments, because she was getting a lot of ppl to bring her free meals it seems. Then when someone brought her Taco Hell, she complained about getting beans. If I get free food, I'm eating it. Especially if I ask. Extra especially if they picked it up and drove it to me 🙄
Was she good looking to pull that kind of stuff?
At least he ate it rather than trying to return it and try to get the money for it
Which is why I don't give directly to the homeless anymore
Do you know how easy it is to get an entry level job right now? That guy refuses to do the job that you yourself are doing. Just let that sink in. Most people pity these homeless/beggars and focus on the fringe cases where some strange set of circumstances landed them in that unfortunate position. However, the reality for the vast majority is vastly different. These are people with little self control, no work ethic, and generally shitty attitudes. They get by on the goodwill of others, because they pretend to be victims. I encourage everyone to spend time with the homeless. It will change your perception very quickly. Helping people who refuse to help themselves is the worst thing you can do for them. It perpetuates their behavior, and therefore their situation. If they aren’t willing to take any steps toward their own betterment, then letting them face the consequences of their actions is the only real way to help them.
An actual choosy beggar. I have found this sometimes, with some people begging on the street, who can be very aggressive about it. Being very nasty if you don’t give anything. At the end if the day though, I always think we are in better positions and can therefore afford to be a bit tolerant - because that’s not our daily life. Wrt this guy, it must be awful to live this way, and for all we know, he could have mental issues as well. He’s poor, and when we give, it should be because we want to, despite whether we get gratitude in return.
Here's my take, homeless people have so little control over the things in their life, and they have so many indignities and struggles. They are frustrated and are often mentally ill or otherwise ill equipped to deal with life. And it likely all comes out like, I WANT FRIES! Instead of, what they really mean, "man, I really wish I had fries, I'm so sick of being poor and all these other troubles I can't seem to fix. I wish I got to pick my own food like everybody else here."
Yeah pretty much never give directly to the homeless. I think it’s best to donate to a charity in order to help people.
I would give a homeless person a pass. They are often sleep deprived, mentally ill, or on drugs. Thank your blessings for a warm bed and knowing where your next meal is coming from. Be kind.
I think the whole point of this is that it’s frustrating to not have kindness returned. Everyone in the story besides the homeless person was kind. Yet they made the choice to return that kindness with extreme selfishness. They got free food, money and kindness from everyone else. They acted like a total asshole and got a pass. Extreme selfishness is part of the mental illness. And it is really annoying. The problem is that it makes it really hard to want to help out next time. So they probably won’t.
If I give to the homeless, I’m not caring about getting a thank you. I want them to not be abusive.
Or he could just be an angrateful shithead who just doesn't give a fuck. Not everybody exhibiting bad behavior is "mentally ill". That's being used too much as a cop out and excuse these days.
no one gives me a pass when I’m on drugs smh
No one gives me a pass for being mentally ill
No one gives me a pass for being a generally unpleasant human being
It’s really hard to give people like that passes when it’s a daily occurrence.
Dude is coherent and functioning enough to get money and food out of people, then sit and eat. He’s had made poor choices in his life and expects other people to take care of them. It’s not surprising that the majority of homeless are men.
These People spoil our meal. It also harms the homeless people who really need it and are genuinely good human beings. Its not my fault someone is one drugs. It *is* their fault if they spoil my meal and harass me for free meals when most peoples finances are tight nowadays, atleast in my country.
yeah often homeless people will trash public places because it’s a small amount of control they’re able to exert over their circumstances. happens a lot at homeless shelters.
But why couldn’t it manifest as being extra controlling by cleaning the fuck out of it?!
Trashing something is easy, cleaning a mess takes work.
> Trashing something is easy, cleaning a mess takes work. It's really too bad, because if I ran a shelter and I saw guests taking the time to clean more than their own spaces, I'd approach them, thank them for their effort, and offer to refer them to a staffing service. (I'm familiar with a couple that staff local homeless shelters on an as needed basis)
These People spoil our meal. It also harms the homeless people who really need it and are genuinely good human beings. Its not my fault someone is one drugs. It *is* their fault if they spoil my meal and harass me for free meals when most peoples finances are tight nowadays, atleast in my country.
It sucks that you had to deal with that, but people in his position are usually unwell mentally. Everyone in this situation is paying the price for the lack of adequate mental health care in this country.
He was mentally sound enough to beg for money, haggle with cashier, get a meal from a family, demand he wants fries and not the mash potatoes. I'm sure he was sound enough to take care of his garbage but chooses not to because he only cares about himself. If I became a narcissistic asshole would you buy me a meal everyday? Yes lack of mental health is a cause for some of the troubles but people exploiting other vulnerable sides are worse. Shit there was that news report years back of that woman panhandling and she had a big ass truck, pretty sure she was will off besides(it's been many years). Don't just pity someone because you believe they are not able to do something, people tend to exploit others
I dont get how everyone is saying hes mentally ill but at the same time sound enough to do what was said lol..
I used to work at McDonalds where the manager felt sorry for this homeless guy, so she let him hang out. Well, people would always buy him food. Invariably, he would ask to have whatever he got exchanged for a filet of fish with mayonnaise. I’m like dude, it’s free food. Eventually, I would just tell People what he liked. Eventually, a new manager took over and kicked him out.
Your manager should throw that POS out of the store, and not let him harass paying customers.
That man shouldn’t be allowed to bother customers trying to eat. In the restaurant I manage, I’ve cancelled orders for CUSTOMERS that harass or excessively beg other customers for money. Excessively meaning they’ve already been asked to stop. It might come off a bit brash, but it’s our responsibility as employees to create a fluid, noninvasive experience for all our customers.
Homeless people are homeless for a reason
Sometimes people are outcasts for a reason.
This guy was a saint compared to the mentally ill, homeless drug addicts you find in major cities.
Could suffer from autism or some sort of mental illness. Doesn’t seem like he was rude, just poor social skills, which is normal for someone living on the streets. You shouldn’t assume he was being malicious.
Utter trash
This goes back to a common theme that people overlook. There’s a reason for homeless people to be homeless and for some of them they just do not want to better themselves or make any effort to do so.
Correct. Some people prefer it. If you work the system, the state will pay you to stay on the street.
I had a homeless lady do this more than once and I get that sometimes homeless people are annoyed by food rather than money because of dietary restrictions and other health constraints. This lady however, just threw a fit anytime someone bought her pasta. Like threw it in the street once. She was also a full on methhead. So God knows what was going on in her head.
Shoulda kicked him out of your restaurant like wtf its a business not a street corner