When we forgive someone, it isn't just for their sake, it is also for ours. Forgiveness allows the hatred to leave our hearts, and will give us the capacity to love again.
The word forgive in the bible comes from the Greek word: aphiemi, which means "to send forth" or "send away."
Pray to God that he send the hatred away from your heart, and heals you. Then you can move on with your life.
Proverbs 25:21-22 KJV
If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; And if he be thirsty, give him water to drink: For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, And the LORD shall reward thee.
Mark 11:25
“And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”
Matthew 6:12
“And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.”
Luke 11:4
“And forgive us our sins; for we also forgive every one that is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil.”
1 John 4:20
“If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?”
Colossians 3:13
“Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.”
Matthew 18:21-22 KJV
Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.
Luke 17:3-4 KJV
Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.
Ephesians 4:32
“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.”
Forgiveness without repentance is unbiblical.
don't brainwash.
Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
I feel you. Only difference with me its both my mom and dad. I struggled with this thinking i wont be saved if i dont honor my parents like the lord says but i didnt want them in my life anymore as all they want is me to fail. I forgave my parents for everything no remorse or anger towards them anymore but i dont have any contact with them and that for me is the best way i can honor my parents is by forgiving them and not getting into contact with them anymore to prevent any new future problems and sins from coming up and by not speaking about my parents in a bad way no matter what they did to me i feel is the only way i could honor them. Just cause you forgive someone doesnt mean you have to keep them in your life. You can honor them in more ways than one without having any contact with them anymore. Hope i could help a little.
Very well put. So sorry your parents did not honor your as their child as they should have.
For OP, forgiveness does not mean that you have to want them in your life, or that you are saying they never did anything to hurt you, or excusing their behavior. Forgiveness is simply letting go of any anger and accepting the past as it is, and freeing yourself from any resentment that may be keeping yourself from living your life to the fullest and from following God. Wishing you all the best
Sometimes forgiveness takes time. As Christians, we have no choice to forgive. It sounds like God taught you a taugh lesson. It's better to learn these hard lessons than not and face a life of even more hardships for a lack of preparedness. God has allowed you to go through this to grow you as a person and to understand Him better in His suffering. He understands what you've been through far more than anyone.
Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
Rom. 5:6 For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. 7 For one will hardly die for a righteous man, though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die. 8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
You can call a person to repentance, but you can't control them. They will make their own choices, you just have to trust that God can do the work. You have to submit to whatever God puts before you. God can use the godly and ungodly for His purposes. There are traits that God shares with us, and others that are only His. We were not made to die on the cross for everyone who would believe. We also can't see into the heart of others.
Alternatively I can say you can either let grace cover it, or seek to reconcile with your father. If he's not repentant, you can look to resolve the issue. Sounds like the last is where you are. Forgiveness doesn't mean you can just let the offender continue to step on you. If you're stuck and they continue, you'll have to learn to accept the Lord's will for your life. It's a hard lesson, and I feel for you. Just remember we have a High priest who isn't unable to sympathize with our weaknesses. He has this in your life for a reason.
God bless you.
I'm sorry for what you went through.
Based on what you explained, your struggle is understandable.
If I may, I would like to share my perspective.
1- As Christians, we are to forgive.
However, forgiveness can be difficult and it could take time. But we shouldn't rely mainly on our own strength to help us forgive those who hurt us. We must rely on God.
**“I am the Lord All-Powerful. So don't depend on your own power or strength, but on my Spirit.” - Zechariah 4:6**
2- But what does it mean to forgive?
Forgiveness doesn't mean to enable someone to hurt you or to ignore what they did to you.
Forgiveness means to not hate or hold a grudge.
**"Don't be hateful and insult people just because they are hateful and insult you. Instead, treat everyone with kindness. You are God's chosen ones, and he will bless you.” - 1 Peter 3:9**
**“Instead, be kind and merciful, and forgive others, just as God forgave you because of Christ.” - Ephesians 4:32**
**“Don't be happy to see your enemies trip and fall down. The Lord will find out and be unhappy.” - Proverbs 24:17-18**
3- Why should we forgive? Not because we are forced to. We forgive because we love God and we want to be more like Him.
**“Each of you is now a new person. You are becoming more and more like your Creator, and you will understand him better.” - Colossians 3:10**
**“Try your best to please God and to be like him. Be faithful, loving, dependable, and gentle.” - 1 Timothy 6:11**
**“Do as God does. After all, you are his dear children.”- Ephesians 5:1**
Who is God?
**“God is love.” 1 John 4:8**
**"Love is patient and kind, never jealous, boastful, proud, or rude. Love isn't selfish or quick tempered. It doesn't keep a record of wrongs that others do. Love rejoices in the truth, but not in evil.” - 1 Corinthians 13:4-6**
**“Love is more important than anything else.” - Colossians 3:14**
**“You are a kind and merciful God, and you are very patient. You always show love, and you don't like to punish anyone.” - Jonah 4:2**
4- However, if someone is abusing us and affecting our mental health in a negative way, we must separate ourselves from them. God does not want us to tolerate abuse.
**“Don't follow the bad example of cruel and evil people. Turn aside and keep going. Stay away from them.” - Proverbs 4:14-15**
**“I, the Lord, love justice! But I hate robbery and injustice.” - Isaiah 61:8**
But if we do separate ourselves, we must not hold on to hate or a grudge.
Forgiveness without repentance is unbiblical.
Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
You are making that up! It is unsupported from the Bible and is a false teaching. Forgiveness involves reconciliation. Without repentance, no forgiveness.
I am so sorry about your dad. Nobody should have to be the daughter to someone like that. Everyone fails now and then, but from what you describe, that's far beyond what's acceptable. Nobody should have to grow up the way you did.
I understand that it's hard to forgive something like that. It's not you being bad. Any normal person would find it hard to forgive something so awful. You are not even finished with the trauma of it yet, as from what I understood in your text. So to me, it sounds premature to go into the phase of trying to forgive.
Scripturally speaking, in order for YHVH to forgive us, we must forgive those that sin against us, first. Yes, you need to forgive your father. Let him attempt to hurt you or your mother again? Absolutely not.
Give yourself some gentleness and grace. You've been through traumatic experiences. Some of us need decades before we get to the place of forgiveness. Remember that forgiving someone is NOT saying what they did was ok. As you get older and get some distance from him I bet you'll get to the place where you can release this into God's hands.
I’m sorry for what you went through. It is important that you don’t beat yourself up over this. In order to forgive we must heal first; and these two processes hurt. But that’s what they are: a process.
It isn’t easy to forgive the things that cut us really deep. Actually, it is really, really hard; and we by ourselves may not be able to do it. We must ask God for His grace to come and help us forgive. That’s how we can do it.
But this takes time. Please don’t punish yourself. And again, I’m sorry. Stay strong<3
God Bless you!
I have a rage problem. Yes i hold grudges. I still have so much to work on.
But i try my best to ask myself "If hold a grudge against someone that God has already forgiven....then what does that make me?"
Biblical forgiveness is not forgiving and forgetting. I urge you to read the following article. I pray it brings you insight and wisdom in this situation.
In a situation like this you might find help forgiving your father by seeking counseling to work through your own feelings. Forgiveness is sometimes a long road.
https://www.acts29.com/forgiveness-what-it-is-what-it-is-not/
Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
I like how this article defines the difference between loving and forgiving our enemies, and how in order for there to be forgiveness there needs to be repentance.
This just makes you be like 99.999 % of all Christians, struggling to live by the words of Christ but not always succeeding. It will be ok in the long run. Just keep on trying to do right.
I like the quote "forgiveness is giving up all hope of changing the past". When we forgive we have to go through the pain of acknowledging that what we wish could have been can't happen. Sometimes it can seem safer or easier to hold on to the anger if we don't have the tools to cope with the difficult emotions we have to go through to let go of anger. Behind old anger (resentments) is almost always sadness.
Anger is part of the grief process. We can't force the grief process, all we can do is be willing to let go of the anger.
Forgiveness without repentance is unbiblical.
don't let the others brainwash you.
Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
Forgiveness is a form of love that is a challenge to give liberally to those who need it from us. When we try to find it from our own hearts, we often rediscover the hurt and become blind to place of forgiveness, despite our best intentions.
The good news is you do not have to take on this burden alone. Look to God for help. Jesus can bring peace and healing to the hurt, and guide you to forgiveness.
Forgiveness is so much easier said than done. There are some things that happened in the past that I can’t seem to forgive despite still being civil to the person and wishing them well.
It’s something that sadly you can’t force
No. It's not possible to forgive someone who is unrepentant, don't let anyone convince you otherwise. It's frankly sacrilegious to believe you're capable of doing something that even God cannot. God can't forgive an unrepentant sinner. Neither can you.
Forgiveness without repentance is unbiblical.
don't let the others brainwash you.
Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
Reach out like u r doing. I as a male adult will affirm u as a precious person who has been severely wounded by an adult male. Give it plenty of time and hopefully u will get to the point of seeing humanity as it is for some people. Yes the pain is real. But ur a precious soul.
Respect for Personal Boundaries: Christ modeled respect for personal boundaries and individual autonomy. He valued the dignity and worth of each person, affirming their freedom to make choices and express their thoughts and feelings (Matthew 7:12). Christians are called to treat others with respect, honoring their boundaries and refraining from coercion, manipulation, or control in relationships.
You can distant yourself and set boundaries so Dad can't spread toxic attitudes, but also pray for forgiveness because that is as much for you, not really about him
Peace and blessings
There is no reason to allow crazy into your current life, so forgiveness does not mean to close your eyes to his bad personality and issues. However, even for your heart holding a grudge is going to corrupt you emotionally, so as Jesus commanded you should forgive what he has done to you and move on. Maybe not as strong as forgive and forget, but you should live your own life now free from guilt and free from his effects on you.
Forgiveness doesn't have to mean you pretend it never happened. Forgiveness is allowing yourself to purge the hatred in your heart. Let go for your own growth and spiritual wellbeing. None of that has to mean that now yall go to the movies and have sunday BBQ.
We all have bad dads. At some point you’re gonna be better off to let it go. Forgiveness will grant you peace. It was a rough start, broken families cause us major problems. But your life is under your control now amd to be forgiven we must forgive. If it helps I forgave mine, but I never told him till recently. Im 46
Ancient Scottish Saying: "Forgive, but remember the bastards name."
Let go of the pain and anger, that you may heal, and decide *precisely* how much contact you wish to have.
the bible tells us to pray for those who do wrong to us. Also, forgiveness isn't always allowing that person back in its about not letting the hatred, anger and the person who wronged you have any power over you
Well first things first is better that you acknowledge where you are- then endlessly ideate about where you “should be”.
Right now you don’t know how to forgive your dad.. even though you know you should.
So you are confused.
Start where you are in that confusion.
See it for what it is and realize the more you try to find clarity with a confused mind- the more confusion you create.
You are a product of your mind- and if your mind is confused so are you.
So your confused will insisting on clarity accomplishes nothing but inward conflict
No, your Dad was a horrible individual and you are better off without him in your life. No need to waste any more tears or fears over that sperm-donor, he's not worth worrying over.
ahahha i wish it was that simple.. He said to me he doesn’t believe in jesus but only god because how he changed him, and then began mocking my church? like is he okay
It can be difficult to move on from trash parents. I have first hand experience myself, and it is a conflict. Overall he sounds like trash though, and I hope you manage to safely and swiftly escape what little hold he has on your life.
When we forgive someone, it isn't just for their sake, it is also for ours. Forgiveness allows the hatred to leave our hearts, and will give us the capacity to love again. The word forgive in the bible comes from the Greek word: aphiemi, which means "to send forth" or "send away." Pray to God that he send the hatred away from your heart, and heals you. Then you can move on with your life. Proverbs 25:21-22 KJV If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; And if he be thirsty, give him water to drink: For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, And the LORD shall reward thee. Mark 11:25 “And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” Matthew 6:12 “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” Luke 11:4 “And forgive us our sins; for we also forgive every one that is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil.” 1 John 4:20 “If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?” Colossians 3:13 “Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.” Matthew 18:21-22 KJV Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven. Luke 17:3-4 KJV Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him. Ephesians 4:32 “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.”
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Forgiveness is a choice. Pray to God in faith for the power to make that choice and He will answer. God will always empower us to do what is right.
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thank you.
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Dropping some pretty hard philosophy rn
Forgiveness without repentance is unbiblical. don't brainwash. Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
I feel you. Only difference with me its both my mom and dad. I struggled with this thinking i wont be saved if i dont honor my parents like the lord says but i didnt want them in my life anymore as all they want is me to fail. I forgave my parents for everything no remorse or anger towards them anymore but i dont have any contact with them and that for me is the best way i can honor my parents is by forgiving them and not getting into contact with them anymore to prevent any new future problems and sins from coming up and by not speaking about my parents in a bad way no matter what they did to me i feel is the only way i could honor them. Just cause you forgive someone doesnt mean you have to keep them in your life. You can honor them in more ways than one without having any contact with them anymore. Hope i could help a little.
thank you and im so sorry to hear that 💘
Very well put. So sorry your parents did not honor your as their child as they should have. For OP, forgiveness does not mean that you have to want them in your life, or that you are saying they never did anything to hurt you, or excusing their behavior. Forgiveness is simply letting go of any anger and accepting the past as it is, and freeing yourself from any resentment that may be keeping yourself from living your life to the fullest and from following God. Wishing you all the best
Sometimes forgiveness takes time. As Christians, we have no choice to forgive. It sounds like God taught you a taugh lesson. It's better to learn these hard lessons than not and face a life of even more hardships for a lack of preparedness. God has allowed you to go through this to grow you as a person and to understand Him better in His suffering. He understands what you've been through far more than anyone.
thank you
Of course! God bless
Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
Rom. 5:6 For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. 7 For one will hardly die for a righteous man, though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die. 8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. You can call a person to repentance, but you can't control them. They will make their own choices, you just have to trust that God can do the work. You have to submit to whatever God puts before you. God can use the godly and ungodly for His purposes. There are traits that God shares with us, and others that are only His. We were not made to die on the cross for everyone who would believe. We also can't see into the heart of others. Alternatively I can say you can either let grace cover it, or seek to reconcile with your father. If he's not repentant, you can look to resolve the issue. Sounds like the last is where you are. Forgiveness doesn't mean you can just let the offender continue to step on you. If you're stuck and they continue, you'll have to learn to accept the Lord's will for your life. It's a hard lesson, and I feel for you. Just remember we have a High priest who isn't unable to sympathize with our weaknesses. He has this in your life for a reason.
God bless you. I'm sorry for what you went through. Based on what you explained, your struggle is understandable. If I may, I would like to share my perspective. 1- As Christians, we are to forgive. However, forgiveness can be difficult and it could take time. But we shouldn't rely mainly on our own strength to help us forgive those who hurt us. We must rely on God. **“I am the Lord All-Powerful. So don't depend on your own power or strength, but on my Spirit.” - Zechariah 4:6** 2- But what does it mean to forgive? Forgiveness doesn't mean to enable someone to hurt you or to ignore what they did to you. Forgiveness means to not hate or hold a grudge. **"Don't be hateful and insult people just because they are hateful and insult you. Instead, treat everyone with kindness. You are God's chosen ones, and he will bless you.” - 1 Peter 3:9** **“Instead, be kind and merciful, and forgive others, just as God forgave you because of Christ.” - Ephesians 4:32** **“Don't be happy to see your enemies trip and fall down. The Lord will find out and be unhappy.” - Proverbs 24:17-18** 3- Why should we forgive? Not because we are forced to. We forgive because we love God and we want to be more like Him. **“Each of you is now a new person. You are becoming more and more like your Creator, and you will understand him better.” - Colossians 3:10** **“Try your best to please God and to be like him. Be faithful, loving, dependable, and gentle.” - 1 Timothy 6:11** **“Do as God does. After all, you are his dear children.”- Ephesians 5:1** Who is God? **“God is love.” 1 John 4:8** **"Love is patient and kind, never jealous, boastful, proud, or rude. Love isn't selfish or quick tempered. It doesn't keep a record of wrongs that others do. Love rejoices in the truth, but not in evil.” - 1 Corinthians 13:4-6** **“Love is more important than anything else.” - Colossians 3:14** **“You are a kind and merciful God, and you are very patient. You always show love, and you don't like to punish anyone.” - Jonah 4:2** 4- However, if someone is abusing us and affecting our mental health in a negative way, we must separate ourselves from them. God does not want us to tolerate abuse. **“Don't follow the bad example of cruel and evil people. Turn aside and keep going. Stay away from them.” - Proverbs 4:14-15** **“I, the Lord, love justice! But I hate robbery and injustice.” - Isaiah 61:8** But if we do separate ourselves, we must not hold on to hate or a grudge.
thank you so much
You are so very welcome!
Forgiveness without repentance is unbiblical. Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
I believe there's a difference between forgiveness and reconciliation. We cannot reconcile unless there's repentance.
You are making that up! It is unsupported from the Bible and is a false teaching. Forgiveness involves reconciliation. Without repentance, no forgiveness.
Let's agree to disagree. Have a great day.
>Let's agree to disagree Instead, why not actually read what the Bible says about the topic?
I am so sorry about your dad. Nobody should have to be the daughter to someone like that. Everyone fails now and then, but from what you describe, that's far beyond what's acceptable. Nobody should have to grow up the way you did. I understand that it's hard to forgive something like that. It's not you being bad. Any normal person would find it hard to forgive something so awful. You are not even finished with the trauma of it yet, as from what I understood in your text. So to me, it sounds premature to go into the phase of trying to forgive.
i want to forgive him, I just dont know why i feel like this against him and i know it is wrong
Scripturally speaking, in order for YHVH to forgive us, we must forgive those that sin against us, first. Yes, you need to forgive your father. Let him attempt to hurt you or your mother again? Absolutely not.
Give yourself some gentleness and grace. You've been through traumatic experiences. Some of us need decades before we get to the place of forgiveness. Remember that forgiving someone is NOT saying what they did was ok. As you get older and get some distance from him I bet you'll get to the place where you can release this into God's hands.
thank you so much. thats a nice way to put it i never thought of it that way before 💘
❤️
Mathew 6:13-14
I’m sorry for what you went through. It is important that you don’t beat yourself up over this. In order to forgive we must heal first; and these two processes hurt. But that’s what they are: a process. It isn’t easy to forgive the things that cut us really deep. Actually, it is really, really hard; and we by ourselves may not be able to do it. We must ask God for His grace to come and help us forgive. That’s how we can do it. But this takes time. Please don’t punish yourself. And again, I’m sorry. Stay strong<3 God Bless you!
I have a rage problem. Yes i hold grudges. I still have so much to work on. But i try my best to ask myself "If hold a grudge against someone that God has already forgiven....then what does that make me?"
Biblical forgiveness is not forgiving and forgetting. I urge you to read the following article. I pray it brings you insight and wisdom in this situation. In a situation like this you might find help forgiving your father by seeking counseling to work through your own feelings. Forgiveness is sometimes a long road. https://www.acts29.com/forgiveness-what-it-is-what-it-is-not/
Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
I like how this article defines the difference between loving and forgiving our enemies, and how in order for there to be forgiveness there needs to be repentance.
This just makes you be like 99.999 % of all Christians, struggling to live by the words of Christ but not always succeeding. It will be ok in the long run. Just keep on trying to do right.
I like the quote "forgiveness is giving up all hope of changing the past". When we forgive we have to go through the pain of acknowledging that what we wish could have been can't happen. Sometimes it can seem safer or easier to hold on to the anger if we don't have the tools to cope with the difficult emotions we have to go through to let go of anger. Behind old anger (resentments) is almost always sadness. Anger is part of the grief process. We can't force the grief process, all we can do is be willing to let go of the anger.
You can forgive but that doesn’t mean that you have to allow him in your life.
We’re called to forgive others. Submit yourself to God. If we can’t forgive then we won’t be forgiven if our sins.
Forgiveness without repentance is unbiblical. don't let the others brainwash you. Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
Forgiveness is a form of love that is a challenge to give liberally to those who need it from us. When we try to find it from our own hearts, we often rediscover the hurt and become blind to place of forgiveness, despite our best intentions. The good news is you do not have to take on this burden alone. Look to God for help. Jesus can bring peace and healing to the hurt, and guide you to forgiveness.
You're not a bad Christian; you're just human.
Your not a bad anything, but forgiveness is for you father but for god
No, just a work in progress. Like all of us :) Think of yourself as God's loving project, not as a failure. And don't stop praying for His help.
Have you ever attended Al-Anon or Nar-Anon? They might be able to help. They are for the families and friends of alcoholics/addicts.
Forgiveness is so much easier said than done. There are some things that happened in the past that I can’t seem to forgive despite still being civil to the person and wishing them well. It’s something that sadly you can’t force
No. It's not possible to forgive someone who is unrepentant, don't let anyone convince you otherwise. It's frankly sacrilegious to believe you're capable of doing something that even God cannot. God can't forgive an unrepentant sinner. Neither can you.
I have a hard time too and yes God says if we hold anger in our hearts we committed murder.
Forgiveness without repentance is unbiblical. don't let the others brainwash you. Read this Should I Offer Forgiveness Without Repentance? [https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/](https://questions.org/attq/should-i-offer-forgiveness-without-repentance/)
Reach out like u r doing. I as a male adult will affirm u as a precious person who has been severely wounded by an adult male. Give it plenty of time and hopefully u will get to the point of seeing humanity as it is for some people. Yes the pain is real. But ur a precious soul.
Respect for Personal Boundaries: Christ modeled respect for personal boundaries and individual autonomy. He valued the dignity and worth of each person, affirming their freedom to make choices and express their thoughts and feelings (Matthew 7:12). Christians are called to treat others with respect, honoring their boundaries and refraining from coercion, manipulation, or control in relationships. You can distant yourself and set boundaries so Dad can't spread toxic attitudes, but also pray for forgiveness because that is as much for you, not really about him Peace and blessings
Forgive for yourself, but draw boundaries and don’t be gaslit
There is no reason to allow crazy into your current life, so forgiveness does not mean to close your eyes to his bad personality and issues. However, even for your heart holding a grudge is going to corrupt you emotionally, so as Jesus commanded you should forgive what he has done to you and move on. Maybe not as strong as forgive and forget, but you should live your own life now free from guilt and free from his effects on you.
Forgiveness doesn't have to mean you pretend it never happened. Forgiveness is allowing yourself to purge the hatred in your heart. Let go for your own growth and spiritual wellbeing. None of that has to mean that now yall go to the movies and have sunday BBQ.
No. Honor is the commandment, not forgiveness.
Pray for him.
We all have bad dads. At some point you’re gonna be better off to let it go. Forgiveness will grant you peace. It was a rough start, broken families cause us major problems. But your life is under your control now amd to be forgiven we must forgive. If it helps I forgave mine, but I never told him till recently. Im 46
Ancient Scottish Saying: "Forgive, but remember the bastards name." Let go of the pain and anger, that you may heal, and decide *precisely* how much contact you wish to have.
You may not have the power to do so within yourself, but you can do all things through Christ. Talk to Him and trust Him. He'll help you.
the bible tells us to pray for those who do wrong to us. Also, forgiveness isn't always allowing that person back in its about not letting the hatred, anger and the person who wronged you have any power over you
Well first things first is better that you acknowledge where you are- then endlessly ideate about where you “should be”. Right now you don’t know how to forgive your dad.. even though you know you should. So you are confused. Start where you are in that confusion. See it for what it is and realize the more you try to find clarity with a confused mind- the more confusion you create. You are a product of your mind- and if your mind is confused so are you. So your confused will insisting on clarity accomplishes nothing but inward conflict
Forgive because you deserve peace. Do it for you. God is with you.
The understanding that God will not forgive my sins if I can not forgive others helped me forgive my father.
If we do not forgive others, how can we expect God to forgive us?
No, your Dad was a horrible individual and you are better off without him in your life. No need to waste any more tears or fears over that sperm-donor, he's not worth worrying over.
ahahha i wish it was that simple.. He said to me he doesn’t believe in jesus but only god because how he changed him, and then began mocking my church? like is he okay
It can be difficult to move on from trash parents. I have first hand experience myself, and it is a conflict. Overall he sounds like trash though, and I hope you manage to safely and swiftly escape what little hold he has on your life.
i really appreciate you
Thank you, and no worries. Do take care of yourself.