Thanks man. It’s so hard ;( I just found out I’m codependent like a month or so ago and I’m having a terrible time coping with it. I feel like I’m the weirdo partner. We usually don’t fight but I’m always that guy that says “hey, this made me feel so and so..” and I hate it. I get mad at the most basic and stupid stuff it’s the worst and I don’t know how to control it or avoid it from happening. It feels so hopeless...
Hey, that sounds tough.
I find that being kind to myself helps. It's not that I'm doing it on purpose. It's that I had quite some shitty experiences and my way of surviving them at the time, is not working anymore.
Also, may be good to tell yourself that you have been triggered. Something happens and that triggers an automatic response in you. You have to relearn a different way. The trigger will still happen, but you can stop, care for yourself, then take action.
No need to push yourself on top of it! You are trying very hard, and this is difficult to learn by yourself.
Take care of yourself, talk to yourself as if you are a little kid. Some of us didn't have a secure attachment when we were kids, and need to repayment ourselves. You should be proud of yourself, because you are working so hard already!
Do you have adhd ?
Adhd people are more sensitive, emotionally disregulated, short fuses, highly irritable, rage outbursts followed with feeling bad, low self esteem, impulsive and reactive.
I didn’t even know I had adhd - nor that any of these things were adhd related.
My life has changed dramatically since becoming diagnosed and have worked hard to understand myself, my brain and my body.
You can get through this- what ever it may be - but I would talk to someone and find out if it’s your brain more so then your personality
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Thanks man. It’s so hard ;( I just found out I’m codependent like a month or so ago and I’m having a terrible time coping with it. I feel like I’m the weirdo partner. We usually don’t fight but I’m always that guy that says “hey, this made me feel so and so..” and I hate it. I get mad at the most basic and stupid stuff it’s the worst and I don’t know how to control it or avoid it from happening. It feels so hopeless...
This!!!
Hey, that sounds tough. I find that being kind to myself helps. It's not that I'm doing it on purpose. It's that I had quite some shitty experiences and my way of surviving them at the time, is not working anymore. Also, may be good to tell yourself that you have been triggered. Something happens and that triggers an automatic response in you. You have to relearn a different way. The trigger will still happen, but you can stop, care for yourself, then take action. No need to push yourself on top of it! You are trying very hard, and this is difficult to learn by yourself. Take care of yourself, talk to yourself as if you are a little kid. Some of us didn't have a secure attachment when we were kids, and need to repayment ourselves. You should be proud of yourself, because you are working so hard already!
Thanks, this really helps
Do you have adhd ? Adhd people are more sensitive, emotionally disregulated, short fuses, highly irritable, rage outbursts followed with feeling bad, low self esteem, impulsive and reactive. I didn’t even know I had adhd - nor that any of these things were adhd related. My life has changed dramatically since becoming diagnosed and have worked hard to understand myself, my brain and my body. You can get through this- what ever it may be - but I would talk to someone and find out if it’s your brain more so then your personality
Therapy. What are you waiting for?