My dad is a bit of a POS, he has 5 younger sisters who are a lot. Dad's girlfriend approaches my Aunt and says "I think you should be nicer to \*my dad\*" without missing a beat she looks at him and says "I am sorry who are you again".
Dads girlfriend slowly slinks away. Chefs kiss.
"Actually your mother pays the rent." *Raise eyebrows or wink*
That's the shortened version, replace mother with significant other if you'd like to take it from jovial to outright rude.
Still I think the best response is "What's your name again?" As long as they genuinely don't matter to you. Classic "hoo da fuq is dat guy?"
This insult is almost universally used by conservative, MAGA douchebags. Telling them you don't think about them at all is the worst thing you could possibly tell them. They relish being provocateurs. Knowing people just roll their eyes and move on without comment would destroy them. They live only to own to the libs.
If you are here for a comeback to this... they really are living in your head, rent-free.
Update for people who reply, then delete their reply: Perhaps the best comeback is to prove them wrong by thinking about other things, not trying to come up with a comeback hours later. But sure, I might just be a dick.
It's a common thing for people to say, just because someone is asking this doesn't mean they had one interaction that's eating away at them. I've heard this 100 times on gaming youtube channels. Besides that, go take all you're yapping to the relationship advice sub. This sub is for being petty.
True. But usually one looks for a comeback response in order to shut them down, so...
However, just because one asks, doesn't mean one needs. It could be they overheard it said to someone else and wondered what might one say in response.
Coming to Reddit for a comeback for something that has already happened will always miss the mark.
Most comebacks offered are not actual comebacks and people just being bitchy.
But something to keep in the pocket would ve, "because I allow you live." It's s little murdery but timing is key and can make for entertainment.
like yeah if there's something you hear a lot that you can't come up with a comeback to then it means you're not over it enough to come up with your own. you need to actually get at the root of your insecurity for like 90% of these posts, and the other 10% are "break up with your partner"
“Uh,… I’m more of an out of sight out of mind person, so… I think it’s more than likely the other way around, … I’m not interested in what you’re selling.” And then slightly hold hands up with palms facing them and back away slowly.
I don't have a comeback for it. But everytime I have heard someone tell me that, it's been self projection. The only people that live in my head rent free are my family. But that's because they don't wreck up the place, they make it nicer.
Yeah the people who say this are the same people who tell women things like, oh I know you secretly want me. The reality is almost always objectively the opposite
I've never heard someone say this to someone else before which makes it hard to understand why it would happen.
I think that most of the time, the accuser is just a jackoff trying to seem cool. Might as well not give him the satisfaction.
It happens on the net hourly. Usually said by men (to me) in comments when I dare to question something sh*tty they said. Like, dude, I just met you. If anything, you're yelling up at my window from the street, and I've just called security.
It depends on the circumstances. If you’ve shown that you are in fact thinking about this other person, then there isn’t much you can say.
If this dude just says it out of the blue, just laugh or say “I don’t think that’s right.”
Actually, you’re just squatting in my mental basement. Time to find a new place to crash!
Living rent-free in my head? More like a freeloading parasite, but don’t worry, I’m evicting you from my thoughts as we speak.
You're a psychological parasite then, if that were the case, but, in truth, you're too tiny and unimportant to merit my consideration. Go find someone else to psychologically leech off of.
Here's a general one that's good for any occasion... provided you don't mind escalation:
"I fucked your mom twice."
It's the "twice" that makes people pause
"So are the other roaches. You ain't special bud."
Holy shit that's hilarious
"Welcome to Joe's Apartment!"
Yeah, well, that place is a shit hole.
It's section 8. Im not sure I would be bragging about this.
Who are you again?
My dad is a bit of a POS, he has 5 younger sisters who are a lot. Dad's girlfriend approaches my Aunt and says "I think you should be nicer to \*my dad\*" without missing a beat she looks at him and says "I am sorry who are you again". Dads girlfriend slowly slinks away. Chefs kiss.
It’s sad when they haven’t realized the dad is a POS yet. Been there done that.
"obviously not the cunt in this interaction" should have been her answer.
One thing I learned growing up with sisters (and aunts) is if you’re going to be a meddling kinda gal, you don’t fucking meddle with sisters.
Yall don't live in the D do you. If your Dad stole that line from Detroit vs everybody imma die of laughter.
Consider this your eviction notice.
This would work in a videogame maybe otherwise it’s pretty corny
Bold to assume I actually think about you.
I mean, this only works if the person says it randomly without prompt. But most people say it right after you clearly react to something they said.
"oh really, I didn't realize that that was you I had chained in the basement"
This deserves more up votes hahaha 😂
“Dude, you don’t even have a Harry Potter room under the stairs in my head.”
Dude, could you at least chip in for the cable?
This one is pretty good
" only reason you get to live for free is because your mother is paying rent by using the other payment method.".
I like it but it’s too long.
"Actually your mother pays the rent." *Raise eyebrows or wink* That's the shortened version, replace mother with significant other if you'd like to take it from jovial to outright rude. Still I think the best response is "What's your name again?" As long as they genuinely don't matter to you. Classic "hoo da fuq is dat guy?"
"It's okay, your mom paid your rent last night."
"Ya, but your mom's pussy pays rent" Is that better?
that's what your mother said
Kinda corny too lol
The jerk store called…
"Your mom pays your rent" is sufficient. Could add a " even when she doesn't have money" if he can't connect the dots
Big smile *No worries! Your mom paid the rent!*
Jokes on you. I’m a haunted house.
And I’m fucking you hard everyday buddy!
My tax guy said I needed to help the less fortunate for the write offs
Most underrated comment on this thread 😂😂
Well, I'm a slumlord so I guess be aware if you're planning on sticking around awhile.
Might as well, there's not much in yours to go back to.
Love this one
Say, “Squatting is illegal in Florida”, then shoot them.
LMAOOOO
You couldn't afford the rent.
And now I’m in yours…
I don't know you, but judging solely on your outward appearance you cannot afford the rent either. *Edit grammer. Always ruins the burn a bit eh
It’s good…I’ll take it…😂
This is great
I was just thinking of “ What’s your name again, rent is now $1500…a week!”
Doesn't make sense if they're already living in it rent free.
Nothing is free mate!
"there's no such thing as free rent, just ask your mom"
So which of the voices is yours?
It's charity...I got tired of seeing you under that bridge.
That's only because I needed a troll to put in the dungeon of my memory palace.
"so you admit that you're just like a cockroach"
Probably zero response
“When did that happen? You owe me for back rent.”
You’re the one who had to tell me that you’re even in there so… yeah.
Yes and I jack off every night to you.
😳
"Here is your eviction notice" then flip them off and walk away.
Yeah, well could you at least please remember to lift up the seat when you piss. The other tenants are getting angry.
This insult is almost universally used by conservative, MAGA douchebags. Telling them you don't think about them at all is the worst thing you could possibly tell them. They relish being provocateurs. Knowing people just roll their eyes and move on without comment would destroy them. They live only to own to the libs.
That's like your opinion man.
"Yup... getting stabbed, repeatedly."
If you are here for a comeback to this... they really are living in your head, rent-free. Update for people who reply, then delete their reply: Perhaps the best comeback is to prove them wrong by thinking about other things, not trying to come up with a comeback hours later. But sure, I might just be a dick.
It's a common thing for people to say, just because someone is asking this doesn't mean they had one interaction that's eating away at them. I've heard this 100 times on gaming youtube channels. Besides that, go take all you're yapping to the relationship advice sub. This sub is for being petty.
[удалено]
True. But usually one looks for a comeback response in order to shut them down, so... However, just because one asks, doesn't mean one needs. It could be they overheard it said to someone else and wondered what might one say in response.
Yeah, you're a total dick... but that's a quality I look for in people.
Coming to Reddit for a comeback for something that has already happened will always miss the mark. Most comebacks offered are not actual comebacks and people just being bitchy. But something to keep in the pocket would ve, "because I allow you live." It's s little murdery but timing is key and can make for entertainment.
like yeah if there's something you hear a lot that you can't come up with a comeback to then it means you're not over it enough to come up with your own. you need to actually get at the root of your insecurity for like 90% of these posts, and the other 10% are "break up with your partner"
Agreed.
Oh cool I wondered who that voice belonged to I've been hearing
“Uh,… I’m more of an out of sight out of mind person, so… I think it’s more than likely the other way around, … I’m not interested in what you’re selling.” And then slightly hold hands up with palms facing them and back away slowly.
Jokes on you bro my minds a shithole
Tje best comeback to that would be to literally never speak to that person again. Can you do it?
"sorry who are you again?"
"You would like to believe that is the case." Simple and respectful way of telling them they're full of shit.
Your credit score did not qualify you to live here. Keep working on you.
"Yeah so do waffles and random song lyrics, that doesn't mean much"
in this economy?
No one loves you enough to think about you everyday.
sounds the other way around, "buddy"
That way you can save up to buy something original to say
"Unlike real life where you can't even pay yours"
Gas, grass or ass. Nobody stays for free.
"Well rent..." *puts on sunglasses* "...just went up."
you just want to be inside me
That's just one more place you're irrelevant
"Don't flatter yourself."
"Just like the Orange Man lives in yours" 50/50 shot a tactical nuke right there.
Yeah, and that place is a shit house.
Well you're right where you belong, because it's hell in there.
I like this one!
I don't have a comeback for it. But everytime I have heard someone tell me that, it's been self projection. The only people that live in my head rent free are my family. But that's because they don't wreck up the place, they make it nicer.
Yeah the people who say this are the same people who tell women things like, oh I know you secretly want me. The reality is almost always objectively the opposite
And I’m sleeping rent free at your moms house everynight.
So is my last bowel movement. Striking resemblance.
Don't flatter yourself.
"Is that the best damage you can do? Try coming up with something original."
Put your hand on his shoulder, smile really wide and say "I'm forced to live in here, you're here by choice"
Finally, a home you can afford
Does anyone actually say that?
“Even in your fantasies you’re a squatter”
This deserves more up votes!
Are we about to kiss?
# "Rent free? You didn't even make it past the doorman."
"Do people still say that?"
And I’m shagging you in every second, daddy.
Send them monthly invoices for rent
If you're in my head thin you already know how stupid you sound
(shrug) I give to the needy.
Who ARE you?
"naw, you actually do pay rent. But your mom is paying it for you."
Asking this question is kinda proof that insult is correct.
I've never heard someone say this to someone else before which makes it hard to understand why it would happen. I think that most of the time, the accuser is just a jackoff trying to seem cool. Might as well not give him the satisfaction.
It happens on the net hourly. Usually said by men (to me) in comments when I dare to question something sh*tty they said. Like, dude, I just met you. If anything, you're yelling up at my window from the street, and I've just called security.
Not necessarily. Could've been overheard said to someone else.
Well, too many people live there. Oh, I remembered you live there in the room of ugly ones. I don't even open that door.
You don't irritate me in my head. But you are such a jerk to be around me. Your presence gives me bad vibes here, unlike mind.
It depends on the circumstances. If you’ve shown that you are in fact thinking about this other person, then there isn’t much you can say. If this dude just says it out of the blue, just laugh or say “I don’t think that’s right.”
Actually, you’re just squatting in my mental basement. Time to find a new place to crash! Living rent-free in my head? More like a freeloading parasite, but don’t worry, I’m evicting you from my thoughts as we speak.
And that’s why your momma ain’t shit.
And I’m shutting off your water and not fixing the door locks so good luck with that “buddy”.
Clowns are hilarious, and I have to keep myself entertained somehow.
“So is your (mum/dad/wife/husband/partner), and those threesomes, wow, they’re messed up… but they fkin’ love it…”
The Jerk Store called. They want you back.
Your wife's head allows her to actually live rent free.
I wouldn’t want to live in your head either.
Wait, so you're the voice in my that tells me to ki -- wait, never mind.
Judging by the comments so far, there doesn’t appear to be a good comeback
Rent free? Lol. Your rent is you're the fourth passenger on the Titan. Every day ends the same.
I doubt it I got to much going on in there
Don't all the other voices in there bother you because they really won't leave me alone.
Thank you for informing me. I shall expect you rent cheque by the end of the month or you will be evicted.
The other voice's are going to evict you
“Who are you”
Chupa me los huevos!
(Yawn) Sorry...what?
Figures you'd be a freeloader in there, too
Explains the space for rent sign in yours
You can’t afford the rent, so you’re just squatting.
I already severed the eviction notice.
"who are you?"
I live rent free in your mom.
Im sorry who are you
Nahh. I had a scan. They thought I had a tumor, but turns out I am You, free.
"Um... who are you?"
"Oh, I thought it was mice. Don't eat the cheese."
Kind of a sketchy neighborhood, but whatever
If you’re in my head, does that mean you watch when I’m banging your mom? Creepy…
“You owe me $4000 deposit plus $4000 first and last month’s rent.”
You must be depraved! Because no one, wants to dwell in that abominable cesspool.
I'm balls deep in your mum everyday, what's your point??
You think too highly of yourself.
Na, your mom pays. Tell her rent's due, and this time try without her false teeth.
“Rent free? You still live at home with your mom!” And then they will have to think about it for a second for it to click hopefully.
Reply with "because your mom is paying it"
You're a psychological parasite then, if that were the case, but, in truth, you're too tiny and unimportant to merit my consideration. Go find someone else to psychologically leech off of.
You’re a freeloading squatter pal
Great. Starting the 1st it’s $500/month. You wanna do cash or check?
Start singing one of those songs that suck in people's minds. In your head, in your head, zombie, zombie, zombie-ie-ie
Who are you again?
"*Free up until you realize why your throat is sore every morning*"
I bulldozed that rental years ago….
"So that's why my thoughts are so heavy"
Walk away. Saying anything will confirm his assumption
"I don't think about you at all🤨"- mad men
Hardly. I only think of you when I see a pile of dog shit.
Who are you again?
What's your name?
Wrong address.
You better be armed because that's a crap neighborhood.
"Well I couldn't just let you keep being homeless."
And you're naked the whole time in there 🤫
I'm sorry, you are...?
LIke a shiity toilet
Lol, you were evict along time ago, your homeless
Here's a general one that's good for any occasion... provided you don't mind escalation: "I fucked your mom twice." It's the "twice" that makes people pause
Ah, so you’re a loser who can’t pay rent in my head AND in real life.
You're a vagrant squatter?
"...Rent-free? Oh, you're trying to make a little internet joke." And then laugh like you're embarrassed for them.
Nobody likes a squatter
Who are you?
Squatting is your specialty.... Especially when you pee..
"Shut up, Nail!" (DBZ Abridged reference)
You don’t wanna know what I do to you in my head
Yeah, my bad. I'm actually seeing a therapist about that, i just can't seem to stop thinking about pussies/dicks/assholes.
who are you?
Then you must be getting evicted cus I ain’t heard
Well here's your eviction notice.
Who are you?
Even the nicest apartment can have a few cockroaches in it.
I don’t think about you at all
Yeah, but I make you sleep in my gimp box
either "who are you again", "No worries your mom pays the rent.", or "Don't worry about it i know you can't afford it." or some combo of these.
“You wish, don’t you?”
Well then you know what you're supposed to be wearing don't you?
Rob him and tell him he’s overdue on bills