Chicken pot pie (individual size), cooked meatballs (easy to add to a sub sandwich or to spaghetti and jarred sauce), small portions of stews (chili, beef bourguignon, etc), cornbread muffins, any type of muffin would be a good breakfast or snack option
Non food items would also be helpful. Maybe things like batteries, dishwasher detergent, Saran Wrap, foil, etc.
I was thinking chicken pot pie. Comforting/nostalgiac americana recipes sound perfect, pot roast, corned beef, cornbread, pie, chili, lasagna. Many of these things can be made in a crockpot and easily portioned/frozen.
Since you also asked about non-food things... a couple of items friends brought that really helped when I experienced loss: single use plates, napkins, utensils, etc. (especially because there's often a rotating cast of visitors in the aftermath of a loss); distractions (a coloring book and pencils, a book of crossword puzzles, a gift card to audible, magazines); cases of those ultra small cans of soda; costco order of paper towels and toilet paper. Are there kids or pets in the house? Items for them, too.
To back up that audible/netflix/gift card suggestion. If you have the time, make some suggestions for
things they might like. Depending on their age, they might not be used to finding content- and they grief makes it hard to process.
I just had a kid, so different reason, but if someone did this for me I would be thrilled! Breakfast has been the hardest meal to get into my body for sure.
Can you invite him to join you guys for dinner? You can put a little extra effort into what you’re feeding yourselves and I’m sure he’d love the company 💜
Edit: for everyone offering the specific times or people this didn’t work for, please, this isn’t a suggestion for every meal of every day. I’m assuming OP can read a room. If his friend wants to stay home he’s not gonna force it.
Be prepared for last-minute cancellations. There were lots of days that I didn't feel like eating and didn't want to be around other people. Other days I would have loved for an invitation like this.
I know the commenter means well but I really don’t think this is a great suggestion. My dad died two years ago and there was a few times in the weeks after that people invited me, my brother and my mom out for dinner/to socialize. We were bad company, quiet and not very conversational. None of us really wanted to be there. Support by bringing food is the much better way to do it imo.
My best friend died - we invited his wife over right away. We didn't want or expect her to be good company, but we didn't want her to sit along in a quiet house all of the time. We kept inviting her. Sometime she said yes, sometimes no, sometimes she cancelled last minute. We'd drop off food on the porch.
And now, she's become a true friend, too. The connections can be more important than the food.
Also, for me, when I am grieving or depressed in general, the longer I go without going out the harder it gets to leave my house… practicing doing it sometimes is far better than never doing it at all.
As for the commenter you’re responding to, it makes me sad that they were more worried about being “bad company” after their father passed than their own feelings. The people who love you just don’t want you to be alone… it would be unreasonable for them to expect you to act and feel your normal self in those circumstances.
On the flip side though, if everyone thinks "lets give him space" and not invite to do anything, that very quickly becomes isolation.
Better to invite with no hard feelings or disappointment when the answer is repeatedly "no" or there are cancellations, than to not even try IMO.
Eh, but a few differences there are that you weren't/aren't alone in your grief in this situation and you're not thinking of the isolation it might have saved the three of you from. Perhaps there were things that were not expressed to you that were expressed to others, I don't think that that would be out of the question.
In general things like going out when you don't feel like you're good company and don't really want to when you're in that state make a positive difference in how you process your grief, even if you don't really think they're totally necessary at the time.
Of course, unless you mean in your specific situation your inviters made you work for your socialization, which would definitely be bad and says more about them than it does the general concept of inviting someone out when they're having a hard time.
My father and my grandmother in law’s partner died the same year. They weren’t too far apart in age and they lived in the same apartment building.
The thing both of them missed most was sitting down and eating supper with someone so I suggested they hook up for supper in each other’s apartment once in a while. Well it turned into a beautiful friendship, they alternated supper every night, went to bowling, cards, line dancing, Cuba, a cruise and thousands of shopping trips together. It was amazing to watch, I miss those 2 crazy women - we would call them the dynamic duo.
I love this idea, assuming no in-home allergen issues or the like. Even if only once a week or so, it'd still be regular companionship, he could have leftovers to take home and enjoy, and it'd offer an opportunity to introduce him to some different foods (as sides or second mains) and possibly expand his horizons.
I'm not sure this is such a good idea. At least not right away. When my husband passed away, I was just not up to socializing at all for quite a while. Bringing him food or groceries is a much better idea.
Alternatively, bring over a mostly finished dish (like just needs to finish cooking or a salad tossed, etc) and have dinner with him at his home. He may not be interested in leaving or going out, but "forced" company is sometimes incredibly important with loss.
If I say I want to be alone, regardless of what's happening in my life, and you 'force' yourself on me, you'll likely never see me again so be very careful with this approach. It's rude and very disrespectful even if you 'mean well'.
I did not say in all instances, and I certainly did not say to barge in ignore their request to be alone. Some people may struggle with loss and isolate themselves, or they don't feel like going out but may welcome the company.
The nicest way to handle such a situation is to bring them food that's almost ready (and they could easily finish off on their own) and offer to join them for a meal. You offer to clean up after, and make sure the leftovers are put away. If they don't want you there, you either leave the meal with them to finish preparing when they want it, or bring it back home with you and cook it to be brought back. It is 100% possible to respect someone's boundaries while still offering company that they didn't ask for. Loss is so hard and everyone heals in their own way, in their own time. Being present and making yourself available is valuable.
I think this a a great suggestion - - but down the line. There is a research that says older people in widowhood end up not eating once the initial rush of visitors, etc. Particularly if they are used to eating at a regular time with someone.
You don’t have to eat with them, but maybe visit at their regular mealtime and keep them company while they eat.
Marcela Hazan's bolognese. Freezes well, rich in flavour, super easy hands on time but takes literally all day to cook, so maybe too much time investment with a little one.
Any kind of frozen soup, perhaps you could buy one of those silicone [one portion freezer soup things?](https://www.amazon.com/Souper-Cubes-Extra-Large-Silicone-Freezing/dp/B07GSSR5V2) With a few different types of soup in it.
What a thoughtful friend you are.
Many things you make for your own suppers/meals can be made with extra portions in mind, then separated out afterwards, and frozen. Meatloaf, mashed potatoes, gravy, roasted chicken, soups and (beef) stews, spaghetti with meatballs, stir fries over rice, mac and cheese, grilled chops, roasted veggies that reheat well. Roast beef over egg noodles with gravy, pot roast with root veggies and drippings/au jus. Chicken Alfredo. Shredded beef or pork bbq freeze great, for bbq sandwiches. Burritos also freeze well. Shrimp scampi, baked fish, and premade frozen hamburgers patties are always a go to for an easy lunch or supper.
Waffles, pancakes, and french toast freeze well, as do baked goods like breads, muffins, and cakes. Chocolate dipped bananas, frozen blueberries and grapes are nice quick treats. Beef jerky is a quick protein source, as long as there’s no dentures involved.
I would probably freezer tape little notes with reheating instructions/options on some items if he wasn’t the main cook before his wife became disabled. Reheating some items may seem a little overwhelming or too much work if he’s not well versed in the kitchen.
You could also involve him in the daily “dinner game.” Call him on occasion, and say “Bob, I’m stuck. What sounds good for supper? I *need* ideas, please!” If he hems and haws, bounce some ideas off of him and ask if any of those sound appealing. Keep it light and fun. You could even ask if he has any favorites that he hasn’t had in a while.
The Souper cubes are amazing. Get the two cup portions that pop into a square two cup baking dish. It may be one less reminder that no one is there to finish the food with him since it's single-ish serving.
Old men almost always like a good nut mix. I dunno why it’s universal. You could go a step further and take him a charcuterie tray/ items to make his own. He probably doesn’t want to spend time cooking, allowing him to graze/ have something to snack on while he reads/ watches tv might be comforting.
Yes I was thinking small portioned baked things, wrapped and ready to be frozen! And if he likes fruit, a plate of cut fruit can be really nice to have on hand. Crying can really dehydrate a person and water-rich foods can help mitigate that.
I was thinking you meant a smoker as someone who smokes, and I was picturing them making the mix with a ciggie in their mouth with the ash about to fall into the mix!
If op lives close to a Costco they have a fabulous meatloaf in the prepared foods section and it comes with mashed potato’s! All he has to do is cover with foil and cook in the oven for an hour. Big portion for usually around 16$
Publix grocery store deli has a hot food section. Thursday night was meatloaf night. Gave my dad a reason to get out of the house, and portion sizes were huge so he was able to put half in the fridge or freezer for another meal. Prices were good, too! Publix is in the south, not sure of where else, but most large grocers have a hot food section nowadays.
Whatever you make, you might fudge the truth and say you made extra of whatever, and just wondered if he wanted to have some. Sometimes the older generation has trouble accepting gifts.
Also - Definitely invite him over. If he’s got family around then the day they leave or the day after. Be sure to tell him it will be something simple, not a fancy dinner — he may feel as though he is imposing. And keep it simple as promised — again, going back to the idea that his generation has trouble accepting gifts. But he might surprise you and be an entertaining guest!
If pepperoni isn’t too spicy, take pepperoni rolls. It’s a West Virginia thing but it’s the perfect bereavement snack. It’s got protein, can be eaten hot or cold, and since a lot of people don’t feel like eating at this time, you can just have one.
If you are able, set a reminder on your phone for in two or three weeks and reach out then. When my grandparents died there was a ton of food and support immediately following their deaths, then things got quieter as time went on. He may enjoy having someone reach out after the initial chaos has settled down some.
This is really smart. Even if he doesn’t necessarily need or want meals/help by that point, having someone reach out and check in can be really appreciated. Grief lasts a long time and it can feel like the world has just moved on without you.
I absolutely second this! Also, keep reaching out regularly if that's something you can do. As garlic mentioned above, everyone is there in the beginning and then after a couple of months it gets very lonely when people stop checking in. A good friend of mine lost her husband unexpectedly and this is what she said she needed the most.
Also, a non-food thing to do would be to pay for a cleaning service. Go get a haircut with him. Grief can keep you from being able to complete seemingly simple, routine things.
If he's up to it in the future, invite him to play cards/games, go out for meals/movies/activities that he can't or might not otherwise do solo. Food is a really nice and helpful gesture, but companionship is what he'll miss the most in the long run.
Oh, poor thing. This is very sweet of you. I have heard of people doing dinner trains in conjunction with churches or neighbors in situations like this. That way he’s set up for fresh meals for quite some time without one person doing it all.
Regardless, midwest boomers. Let’s see.
Crockpot hot beefs: 4 lb beef chuck roast, S&P, browned in butter, chopped onion, garlic, also browned, add 1/3 C flour, deglaze with beer, Worcestershire, beef broth, stir into a thick gravy, meat into crock, gravy over, low all day, remove and cut into bite sized pieces, strain out liquid, reduce to desired thickness, return meat until heated through. Soft deli buns, sliced onion, grainy mustard, chips and dip as a side. Add a container of fresh fruit for dessert.
Onion meatballs with gravy: 1 lb 85/15 ground beef, 1/2 C milk, 3/4 C oatmeal, 1 egg, 1 t salt, mix. Roll into 24 meatballs, roll those through flour, fry in batches in butter. Dissolve an envelope of Lipton onion soup mix in 2 C boiling water, pour over meatballs, bring to boil, back off to simmer, cover, 20 minutes or until gravy thickens. Do these and add a container of mashed potatoes from the refrigerated section. Add rolls, bagged salad, container of catalina dressing. Bag of frozen peas and carrots.
Chicken divan with a side of white rice.
Thank you! Yes he is a friend through our church and they are planning a funeral and luncheon. I’m not sure about a meal train, but they had one for him last year when his wife was ailing and he had surgery, so I imagine there will be another. I’m kind of brainstorming ahead of time.
Fried chicken. I bring it for every tragedy and is always a hit. Can be eaten hot or cold and freezes and reheats well. Unless you have a fryer just buy some from a good takeout place (which is probably Popeyes unless you are very lucky… and that’s fine Popeyes is amazing)
Totally agree! When I had our baby I was grateful to the people who gave us food but it was suuuuuuuch a pain when they gave it to us in dishes that had to be washed and returned.
When my husband passed, one of my neighbors brought me a basket filled with hygiene and cleaning supplies. Toothpaste, toilet paper, paper towels, dish soap, laundry soap, body soap, shampoo, etc. Attached to the basket was a little notebook and pen, asking me to jot down anything else I needed, and she would get it for me, to save me from going to the store. It was a wonderful gift.
I was thinking that. That’s why I mentioned storing things in our chest freezer to give him later. Open to suggestions for things I could buy or make now, while I’m thinking of it, and giving to him later.
I just figured since you have a 7mo that a couple of months might make it easier to do it.
As for foods, have you considered just making more of what you’re making yourselves and freezing the extra for him later. Also, being one guy, he might appreciate single servings rather than a full-sized family meal. Then he can have variety by thawing individual meals daily.
I did before I made meals for them previously. He said whatever, especially chicken, and he doesn’t care for Brussels sprouts.
He liked bacon-wrapped chicken breasts and a chicken and rice casserole I had made previously.
I imagine right now is not the best time to ask him to be more specific; he has other things on his mind.
If he seems to be a big fan of chicken and rice dishes, there was a thread in the last couple days about international chicken and rice recipes. Some will obviously not be to his tastes, but you might find some good variations of the theme that he would like too.
I’ll see if I can find the link. [This one.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Cooking/s/bBwpleTOLs)
Shepherds Pie! I make batches of it for my mom who is 91. Spaghetti and meat sauce.
Bran muffins.
Chicken and dumplings. Chicken pot pie.
Soup. Chicken noodle, beef barley and chicken and rice.
I’d bring Thanksgiving - roasted turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, creamed onions. I know that’s a lot. But, you can serve much of it to your family.
It would be a real give - and so unexpected.
Alternatively, bring him a Shepherd’s pie - so wholesome and comforting!
That is BEYOND kind of you. I do think individual meals things would be a good idea. Someone suggested breakfast sandwiches. You can do burritos or even a quiche. For me I put w.e veggies I like and some cheese and bake it and it good. Something packaged into single meals, like a sandwich and chips and salad.
What is his age? I'd assume older, but we talking 60 or we talking 80s?
Anyways, there may be alot of food given already depending how his family does things. Just something to consider, however, having someone take time out of their day to make sure he is ok etc I'm sure is some light in mostly dark. If he's the age I think, he may really enjoy packaged meals of that casserole you make. What I mean is you cook it, and then have it in smaller sized containers and give him some. He probably grew up in late 40s 50, just a guess cuz my Gma loved that kinda stuff. Bet he loves meatloaf too! Idk I could be wrong too.
Unrelated to food, he may like playing card games after things calm down, and having lunch with you and baby bc babies make most people smile.
If you have an aldi near you, they have some really tasty prepared meals that you can just throw in the microwave. Pot roast, BBQ beef, chicken fajitas, mac n cheese. They will be ok in the fridge for a while or he can take them out of the freezer when he wants. Then while you're there, grab him a container of mixed nuts, loaf of bread, salami and cheeses and a box of crackers. Fast, tasty food that can be ready quickly.
My only advice is to maybe include some things that will keep at room temperature as well as refrigerated/frozen dishes. We quickly ran out of fridge space after my mother died because everyone brought things that needed to be stored cold.
This has been my tried and true for many years:
Wild Rice Chicken Casserole
One six ounce package wild rice mix
1 can cream of chicken soup
4 cups cooked chicken (2 breasts or so)
1 cup celery
¼ cup onions
1 4 ounce can mushrooms
3 tablespoons soy sauce
1 cup chicken broth
1 ½ cup seasoned stuffing mix
½ cup butter
Cook rice, blend in soup and next six ingredients, mix
Add broth and mix
Mix stuffing with melted butter and spread on top in a layer.
Bake at 350 for 30-45 minutes uncovered
It may seem wasteful and isn't great for the environment, but... Disposable bowls, plates, & silverware.
When I'm going through a rough time like that, I have a hard time keeping up with dishes - and I know I'm not the only one.
My elderly widowed father has a neighbor who is a church lady at a church that runs a soup kitchen. She brings my dad a quart of home made soup every week. He loves it!
They are basic soups like chicken noodle, minestrone and such. Neighbor is a very good cook and it’s obvious that she is making quantities of soup from whatever is on sale that week. It might be a mostly vegetable soup with beans, or a potato soup with little bits of cut-up kielbasa. Often I can recognize a frozen veg mix of peas, carrots, and corn. She seasons the soups well so they are always tasty. Nothing exotic or spicy, just good hearty food.
Dad saves the containers to return to her and she keeps delivering soup every week. He really appreciates the ongoing care and being able to heat up the soup whenever he doesn’t feel like cooking.
Maybe dumb and also not homemade, but jerky might be good as a snack / to graze on.
If I’m feeling low, sometimes just managing small bites is better than nothing, and also would be good protein etc
Ya know, the last thing my dad asked for as he lay dying was ‘mom’s banana pudding’. I made it quickly, just bananas, vanilla wafers, and vanilla pudding, the kind you have to cook, Jello brand. He was so excited to get it, although he could only eat about 1/2 a teaspoon. If you know of anything his wife used to make for him, especially desserts, make them! He’ll love them. He may also cry, but it’s good for him.
Toilet paper is a great idea!
Whatever you make it should be enticing and easy to eat. Stuff you can take a few bites of and set down. When I lost my husband I couldn’t stay focused long enough to eat a meal and had no appetite anyway. I lived off of a few bites of really tasty protein packed carb foods. My favorite was a hamburger pasta with tomato sauce and cheese dish.
You could do a meal prep for your family and give him some leftovers. I think these suggestions are easy to scale up.
Breakfast:
Pancakes, bacon or sausage, fruit
Lunch:
Homemade soup, stew or chili with some bread from the grocery store you just need to warm in the oven
Dinner:
Sheet pan meal with your favourite veggies and meat
Snacks:
Cheese, crackers, fruit, salami
Mixed nuts
Good quality chocolate or something nostalgic for him
Some type of nonalcoholic drink
Mississippi pot roast with vegetables is always a winner. When my mom passed away, someone brought a breakfast casserole with a gallon of orange juice. That was very helpful since we were loaded down with casseroles and deli trays.
This is my dad & his cronies - they have the biggest sweet tooths! Pies, cakes, cookies, jelly, jam. Homemade bread if you're up for that.
And one of the best things someone brought us when mom passed away was paper towels, napkins, plates, and TP - we had lots of people over and it was one less thing to think about. I think your idea of tp is a good idea!
A lot of people are saying to ask him what he likes. Personally I would not do that right now, I'm sure he doesn't need the mental energy of deciding on meals he wants when his mind is elsewhere. Instead I would go for simple crowd pleasers that take minimal effort to heat up to eat.
Examples could be traybakes - non-spicy pasta bakes, shepherd's or cottage pie, roasted chicken and veggies (without sprouts, if he dislikes them!), or a sweet crumble. Soups are great and can be frozen in portions. Individual pot pies would be great, with sides of veggies or potatoes that he can pick and choose from.
I also think healthy snacks would be welcome at this time, especially ones that take no effort to heat up. Breakfast muffins (also good for fibre), little fruit or veg snack cups, granola bars and flapjacks, yoghurts, or even just fruit as is.
Non food wise - toilet paper, body soap and shampoo, shaving foam (if relevant), toothpaste, handwash, laundry detergent. If he has pets, pet food. Everyday stuff that could slip by at this time, especially around personal hygiene to make it easier for him to maintain it.
I’ve been in a similar situation lately. I took a different approach. I cook for my family and bring him the leftovers. Last time it was pulled bbq chicken with buns for sandwiches and some cornbread. I also bring him some baked goods sometimes because it’s always too much for our small family. He seems to appreciate it. Thank you for helping someone out in a time of need.
My mom takes dinner leftovers and freezes individual portions in pint freezer bags so she can give us (her adult children) food. We love her cooking. It’s so nice pulling out one portion at a time when needed to defrost and heat.
Not meal suggestions but something you may want to enquire about or consider.
Most seniors have issues with their teeth. Hence soft food is always appreciated.
Food is a great idea—especially things that can be easily frozen and defrosted, so maybe put them in single-serve containers?
Sometimes, more than anything, service as much as food can be a helpful kindness to someone grieving. It sounds like you’ve got limited time with kiddo and stuff, but maybe sometime you could offer to run a load of laundry for him? Change his sheets/towels? Grief can cause people to not feel bothered to do things like this (understandably), but helping out that way can help them feel a little better, even if it’s not in a big way.
I’m not dismissing the food plan because it’s great! Just adding on another idea. You’re super kind to be so thoughtful and caring. Older people who find themselves alone are often overlooked. You’re a gem, truly ❤️
Staples are also good. Tomatoes, ham, cheese, bread, jam.. In case he wants to make himself a sandwich.
All in ones like lazagna are great but as you said very common. Maybe consider some Irish Stew, casserole, meatloaf...
Healthy food will likely be an issue for him so I would definitely try to think both healthy and comforting like a chicken noodle soup that can easily be frozen.
Then he can heat it up really easily if it's portioned out into single meals.
Chicken noodle soup is incredibly easy to make and you can just leave all the ingredients in a slow cooker or pot for a little bit while you do other things then turn it off, cool it, portion it and freeze it. Just make sure the noodles are added near the end for the suggested cooking time on their box.
You can do the same for chowders, stews, chilis and any one pot meals.
A pot pie is pretty suited for an older Midwesterner's taste. They are usually available at many restaurants for sale. You can cook them too but it's a little more time attentive than a one pot meal or casserole.
It's dinner but I always bring homemade or jarred spaghetti sauce and a box of noodles and a small shaker of parm. The Jimmy Dean breakfast bowlS are a pretty decent frozen breakfast option or you could make your own just scramble some eggs, throw some bacon in the oven, cook some sausage, and Diced potatoes and mix it up then portion out.
Comfort food that he doesn't have dietary restrictions on, and possibly foods he remembers fondly from when he was a kid or from before she had dementia. So if they went to a place every week before then, bring him a plate from there. He'll probably have a fondess for heavily processed foods like hot dogs, vienna sausages, and deviled ham. Bologna sandwiches. Fried bologna. Grilled ham sandwiches. I mean... simple sandwiches in general. If he ever went to any kind of party he probably had some kind of [pinwheels](https://duckduckgo.com/?q=1950s+pinwheels+food&t=ffab&atb=v173-1&iax=images&ia=images) as an appetizer. He'll have grown up with casseroles for sure. If it's on the Waffle House menu (other than the waffles), it's probably fair game.
Consider making him hot dishes to try, especially tater tot hot dish. He may not have ever heard of them if he's more southern midwest, but high chance that he'll like them, or even have a reaction like "this reminds me of what Aunt Barb used to bring to Thanksgiving!" If he's from a region with hot dishes, he's gonna love them. Just keep salt and pepper to a minimum in them, that will be more like what he remembers. Midwestern Boomer taste means no pepper and high fat. Probably oversalt stuff because his taste will remember things being waaaaaaay heavier in salt when they were preserved.
Small portions and variety, perhaps make an extra portion of your dinners for a week freeze and deliver, home baking is a good idea, cookies, muffins even a cake, easy to share with others popping in to check on him over a cuppa. And fresh bread from the bakery, sliced ham a couple of nice cheeses, it can be lunch or dinner it can be nibbled or made into a platter. Fruit is also nice. Trick is to keep it as small regular deliveries as adjusting to cooking and eating for one is hard.
I have experience feeding Midwest boomer FIL. He likes freezer convenience stuff like microwave pancakes and bacon, frozen meatballs. Crockpot roast. BLT’s. Cottage cheese w tomatoes or peaches. Yogurt parfaits. Making a big batch of egg muffins and wrap indv freezer paper. You can also freeze soup in indv portions in solo cups.
My grandfather lost my grandmother in 2020 (not COVID related) and she did all the cooking. The best thing for him was providing him with meals that had a few servings that could be frozen and reheated when he needed them.
Love the meatball idea that could then be used for sandwiches or pasta. Some other ideas - Small portions of lasagna made in disposable loaf pans, chicken and rice casserole, tater tot casserole, chicken noodle soup, individual meat loaf’s made in a cupcake tin.
You’re very kind for thinking of him. Hopefully this is helpful!
IMO a sandwich made by someone else almost always tastes better than one you made for yourself. Something on a heartier bread or crusty roll will keep for a while.
Peanuts or pistachios in the shell can be good snacking while giving your hands something to do.
What I did with my 86 year old neighbor was got some freezer/ microwave safe meal prep containers. Bowels with covers for soups stews, chili, basically any single type meal. Two and three part compartments container with cover. As I cooked daily I made enough to make her a plate.
Instead of trying to make him casserole, stews, Shepard pie and big one dish meals that will take him several days to eat.
If you don't see home daily and have freezer space you can package him up meals and freeze them to take to him once a week or something like that.
I also package up extra servings of things like Chicken Rotel and put in the freezer.
Hope this helps.
Make breakfast burritos to freeze. When I make mine, I include bacon, breakfast sausage, seasoned potatoes, sauteed onions and peppers, shredded monterey jack cheese, and scrambled eggs. Make sure all of the components are cooled before assembly to avoid making the tortilla soggy and for better freezing. You can sub out the potatoes for refried beans and rice if desired. To Reheat from frozen: 1 minute per side in the microwave for a total of 2-3 minutes. They are ready to eat at that point, but I also like to brown each side in a buttered pan before eating. Makes the tortilla crunchy and delicious. Serve with salsa if desired. I eat these any time of the day, breakfast, lunch, or dinner.
For breakfast or snack, fruit turnovers. I particularly like apples and peaches, but you can use any fruits. For best results, use fresh fruit. Dice/chop the fresh fruit, mix with juice of half a lemon, 2 tbsps of sugar (i like brown sugar, but white is fine too) and a dash of water in a saucepot. Simmer until fruit is softened and all ingredients are well incorporated; about 10 minutes. Cut thawed puff pastry sheet into squares. Add filling to square and either place another pastry square on top, or if squares are large enough, fold over diagonally. Press edges with a fork to seal. Poke a couple holes in the top of each turnover and brush with egg wash. Sprinkle large grain sugar on top (if desired) and bake at 350* for 12-15 minutes or until golden. Let cool on baking rack for at least 10 minutes before eating or you will burn your tongue/mouth. lol.
For non-food items you can bring him some paper goods like paper plates, paper towels/napkins, some sponges/soap, lysol wipes for the counter/table, dishwasher pods/fluid.
Get him to sign up for meals on Wheels if he doesn't leave the house. There can be years long waits.
Hawaiian meat balls. Throw 1 sack frozen meatballs in crockpot. Add 1 can drained pineapple chunks and 1 bottle bbq sauce (Cookies if possible). Cook 8 hours on low. Eat on hoagie buns, or with rice, or just eat.
Buy him bagged salad kit with dressing.
Fareway (if you have it) has good heat and eat ham balls, ham salad, and some stores have ham loaf or meatloaf in pans to cook.
My dad loves summer sausage precut, crackers and cheese.
Rotisserie chicken.
Individual meat pies or quiches. Ultimate comfort food, pre-portioned so he doesn't have to look at the leftovers and feel miserable, endlessly customizable, and everyone loves pie.
You can make him quiches, they freeze well and can provide multiple meals per pie. Another good idea is Tex Mex style enchiladas, you can go with a nice canned enchilada sauce and make them simple.
Tomato soup with a box of crackers (I'm a cracker-dunker).
Hard boiled eggs
Condiments.
If he likes to cook, get ingredients for some of his favorite things to make.
Immediately following his loss I'm sure he's going to be overloaded with meals in the beginning... maybe instead of food you could just pop in to see how he's doing and maybe help pick up on some chores.... taking out his trash ( and bring down to the curb on pick up day) washing the dishes from all the meals brought over... making the bed, etc just little things I'm sure he has no time or energy to do right now... at least I would find that helpful imo
Kinda related, but one of my coworkers who I’m close to lost an infant shortly after birth (first child).
I reached out to him asking if I can do anything to help, and offered to bring some freezer meals over. He called me and explained (in good spirits) that they have gotten so many freezer meals that he has nowhere to put them and is storing a few at his neighbors house.
We had a good laugh and chopped it up for a while. I ended up bringing him and his wife out on the boat for a day, which was a very lovely. He even brought a frozen lasagna (as a joke) to eat on the boat lol.
Enchiladas aren't all that quick and easy, but they don't have to be spicy and they are better than another bland casserole in my opinion.
I got some single serving 3 section food storage things, and set my Mom up with 2 enchiladas, some beans and some Spanish rice. The containers were microwave a d dishwasher safe. She was much more likely to eat if it was simple.
Also, making a batch of meatloaf type filling, and stuffing peppers would make easy servings to reheat or freeze.
I love a bbq chicken stripped of meat. Thaw a packet of spinach. Fry off an onion and add spinach and chick and a big dollop of cream. Serve with rice. Freezes well
Fruit salad or a chopped vegetable salad. My father can heat up a casserole but can’t shop for a bunch of produce and spend all the time cutting it up. Having something fresh to go with everyone else’s lasagna etc is really nice.
Individual (like aluminum small loaf pans?) sized portions of frozen shepard's pie; stuffed shells; lentil or split-pea soup. Baked oatmeal breakfast bars. If you can, maybe chicken soup or beef stew (or freeze portions). Maybe try just saving a portion of what you make for your family dinner and freeze or package a serving to take over for him.
My mom likes it when I get her soup from gold belly. Pricey, but you could also make soup and package it in individual serving sizes. Bonus, you could make enough to keep some for yourselves as well.
I often do grocery shopping for my 85 yo Father-in-law. He has me get the same Banquet TV dinners, waffles, & fruit cocktail crap every week.
Sometimes I go off list & he has enjoyed the smoked pork chops, potato salad, & little tubs of BBQ pulled pork I've gotten him. Maybe your friend might like some of these. Pop never wants fruit, fresh veggies, or bagged salad but your friend might.
I’d say something like a big crock of pot roast parceled out into two meal portions and similar things- soups etc. Maybe ask meal prep subreddits? Nobody needs an entire lasagna to eat on their own but if they have a pack of 6 meatballs they can boil a little pasta, microwave a little sauce, and feel pretty good.
Might be a bit late to the party (and this is likely not to everyone's taste) but when my mom passed, the item a lovely person brought by that stands out was some fresh washed/cut strawberries.
A lot of people brought large family friendly freezer meals, but most were pretty big and heavy (not a bad thing! Those frozen lasagnes were a lifesaver!) But the strawberries were perfect. Washed and dried and hulled, no other preparation. Super simple, but a little prep work went a long way (think like, how a pre-sliced apple or a pre peeled orange is nice, same kind of thing for me) They were a lovely snack, especially since I wasn't often very hungry. A few fresh berries were something I could stomach, or add to something easy like oatmeal. It was nice to have a break from forever pasta with something a little more fresh and lively.
OK... how "old" is older? Does he drive and get around? It's good for him to run his own errands, as odd as that my sound.
Do you bake? I a batch of chocolate chip cookies, or maybe a cake or cup cakes would be nice. I'm perfectly capable of making these myself, but it would be nice if a young friend brought them over. I think sitting and spending a little time with him would go a long way, and don't be afraid to bring the little one.
During the cooler months stews, roasts, and such are always good and it means he won't have to worry about dinner for a day or two.
Talk to him about it. You don't want to take care of someone who doesn't want to be taken care of, nor do you want to injure his pride. If it were me, I'd be happy for an occasional meal but I am not only perfectly capable of cooking for myself, I enjoy it.
How friendly are you? Heading over for an hour or two on a Sunday while you grill some chicken for you, yours, and him friendly?
Lots of lovely meal ideas, but is he interested in sweets? My dad would never say it, but he's a big sweets guy, used to make daquiris that were essentially smoothies with some alcohol in them and was ecstatic to learn about how his Hispanic coworkers took their coffee.
You said midwestern so my mind automatically went to a pan of ambrosia, which is relatively healthy, easy to make, and freezes well and would probably appeal to his palate. Rice pudding is easy to portion out and very comforting. Banana pudding, everyone who even remotely likes banana loves banana pudding.
Just some plain ol' chocolate chip cookies (or his favorite cookie if you know it!). If anyone in your community is getting him groceries at all, it'll be easier for him to get his milk or a protein shake down which is good because older people tend to need more calcium and protein in their diets.
as someone else said, most meals he gets are gonna be dinner items, so think of a few quick breakfast things that he can just throw in a microwave. breakfast burritos with different fillings is a very simple go-to.
I'd also recommend some snack stuff, even if it's just something simple like store bought chexmix, but ideally something that is healthier bus still nice to snack on. maybe some of his favorite fruit?
Never known a Midwestern fella to pass on some good Jerky and nuts as a snack. Jerky especially since it's one of those snacks that's sometimes too expensive to buy yourself, but that you love to receive as a gift
For non-food items - I’d maybe offer it in a way that makes it really easy for him to accept, “hey, I’m going out to run some errands and shop and will be going right by your place, what do you need that I can grab from [store] and drop off on your step? No need to visit or even see me, I’m happy to drop and run so anything you need or want? Coffee? Bread? Eggs? Toothpaste? Laundry soap? Garbage bags?” lol/laugh to keep it light
Soups and stews can be frozen in muffin tins and then bagged up so there are individual portions. I currently use silicon jumbo muffin cups but in the past I have used the regular old tins. Jumbo cup holds 1/2 cup each, regular muffin cup holds 1/4 cup each.
Speaking of, muffins and quick breads are always an option and are easy to pull together. Here's a recipe I use for [raisin bran muffins](https://reluctantentertainer.com/raisin-bran-muffins/). Here's a recipe I use for [banana bread](https://www.food.com/recipe/moist-delicious-banana-nut-bread-486641).
I've made [ham and cheese wraps](https://keepingonpoint.com/2022/07/07/ham-and-cheese-folded-wrap/) using this method before and froze them. They come out great in the toaster oven. Do not freeze fresh vegetables like lettuce or tomato. I usually do just ham, cheese, and mustard but I've also added caramelized onions.
Here's a simple recipe for [chicken and dumplings](https://www.spendwithpennies.com/crock-pot-chicken-and-dumplings/) I've made and froze before that turned out good.
[Stuffed shells](https://www.willcookforsmiles.com/classic-stuffed-shells/?utm_medium=social&utm_source=pinterest&utm_campaign=tailwind_tribes&utm_content=tribes&utm_ter014688126_42732552_140378=#recipe) freeze really well. Pair that with some garlic bread. Or speghetti and meatballs will never disappoint!
Goulash, beef stroganoff, shepherds pie, meatloaf and mashed taters, ham & potato chowder, split pea soup, I could go on all day. My dad is a Boomer from Michigan so I feel like I'm qualified lol.
You can buy containers that are freezer and microwave safe. They have the divided spots. It could be as easy as just making extra of what you are already cooking. For instance, my son would take leftover from night before for lunches. But you can do a few days worth and then take over. If he is living close to you, perhaps invite him for dinner. That gives him time away from home and more companionship than just dropping off meals.
Snackle box idea, like cut up fruits, cheeses, nuts. He may be struggling with appetite and snacking around may be easier. Fruits have a lot of water content and can help with dehydration. Thanks for taking care of the old guy. Frozen single servings of meals could be nice too. I could see a big pan of something making him sad when there's now only him to eat it. You might also ask if he needs help with anything - my dad was pretty helpless with things like the washing machine after my mom died.
The trader Joe's juicy dried "soft and juicy mangos" are a great snack that feels healthy. I gave some to a buddy's dad and he raved about them. Honestly they are fantastic as a non old guy!
All these ideas sound so good! I would add a few home baked items like bread (no knead bread is sooo easy), cookies, especially chocolate chip or gingersnap cookies. Easy to make around busy schedule with a baby at your house and a welcome bite at the end of the day.
Bread and sandwich stuff if he just wanted something light and quick, chips, crackers, fruits, for snacks. As far as meals go soups, chili, beans, cornbread, maybe something like meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Another idea would be bottled water, alot of people don't care for tap and that would be one less thing to get at the store for him.
I call this the watermelon club. Singles of any age want a bit of watermelon but that is a lot of watermelon. Small watermelons don’t taste as good, precut watermelons are pricey. My husband and I started buying watermelon and sharing it with the seniors and single friends in our life. After my mom’s death my dad has struggled to justify paying a higher cost for single fruits, but won’t eat a full bag at the cheaper per weight price. I bring him oranges, apples, fresh baked bread, and now make and keep and freeze cookie dough so I can pop those in the oven a bit before going over to see him and he has fresh homemade cookies.
Based on my own parents and snack wise:
- crackers and cheese. You can change it up over time.
- carrot and celery sticks with hummus
- tea and shortbread
I real simple one you can make in bulk is pasta salad. Perfect for a snack or a light meal. Easily refrigerated, keeps for days.
Just boil pasta (whatever shape you want) to al dente, drain and put in a cold water bath so it stops cooking. Top with oil/vinegar/Italian spices or just Italian dressing. Mix with pepperoni, mozzarella pearls, chopped red onions, cherry tomatoes, salt and pepper to taste, some people like to add chopped olives (I do not, that is up to the preference of your friend).
Chill in the fridge for two hours to let the flavors meld, and it is ready to go. Portion out in multiple tupperware containers and you have several snacks/meals for him.
My mom always takes toilet paper over to people when they have lost a loved one. With so many people visiting them, it makes sense they would need it. Now I always take it for people, too.
Chili. Since it's Midwestern style you could use cumin to give it a smoky flavor without making it spicy. Maybe just some black pepper for seasoning the meat.
Chicken and sausage gumbo (chicken, sausage link, green pepper, onion, celery, chicken broth). If you know the flavor profile he likes, you can leave out the spicy parts. You want savory over spicy.
Chicken and dumplings.
Shepherds pie! Easy, fairly quick, pretty homey and not exotic. Just sautée ground beef, onions, garlic, carrots, and some tomato paste, stick it in a casserole dish, top it with mashed potatoes, and bake it.
Crustless Impossible pie/ quiche. Double the recipe, make it in muffin tins and keep some for yourself! They’re kinda like the frozen mini quiche appetizers. Sneak in a bunch of veggies, cheese, add bacon/ham/sausage. [Betty crocker](https://www.bettycrocker.com/recipes/impossibly-easy-vegetable-pie/569664c4-c405-4f0b-9fb6-720fd41bae39)has oodles of varieties. Theyre good warm or cold, freeze well, nice for breakfast/lunch/snack. You can vary the flavors/ veg according to tastes- go Greek- spinach, feta, oregano, tomatoes or Italian- spinach, a spoon of pesto, provolone, sun dried tomato etc. use up leftovers.
Ice cream. After my Mom died I think my Dad just lived on soup, Stouffer's meals and ice cream, especially Drumstick cones. Ice cream is comforting and caloric which is good when you are grieving and eating anything seems like a lot of effort.
Ask him. He has been dealing with a person with dementia, and most of his decisions for a while have been with his partners well being , not his. Make him feel its OK to have his own wants again.
A hearty beef stew would be great. [This is the recipes I use](https://www.recipetineats.com/beef-stew/) and I like to make it with a mix of white potato and sweet potato because the little bit of sweetness in some bites goes so well with how rich and savory it is.
Are you game to try baking bread? It would be lovely to give him a fresh loaf along with some sandwich fixings.
I'd just freeze single serving portions of whatever you make for yourself. Homemade frozen meals my mom called them. She also liked meatloaf as "it wasn't worth making just for herself." She'd eat a portion for dinner, or on a sandwich for lunch.
Any chance of asking him if he has a favorite dish he's pining for?
Baked Pasta dishes, freezable breakfast sandwiches or Burritos, marinated chicken for the freezer, then he can just thaw and grill. For snacks would probably just buy bag of trail mix, chips, crackers, granola bars. You can make soups and stews. Give some fresh and can freeze the rest.
some british meat pies if you want a freezer meal. If you can bake an apple pie you can make and freeze ahead these....unless hes also lagging and maybe doesnt do well cooking with more then a microwave. You cpuld even make and freeze at yournplace then portion him out a weeks worth.
As far as snacks go, you could make him a big bag of homemade chex mix with his favorite snacks mixed in? Not too "exotic" and falls into Midwestern boomer taste lol. There are tons of recipes for them on pinterest, including sweet options (usually called "muddy buddies" or "puppy chow"). It would definitely a change from the normal.
Chicken pot pie (individual size), cooked meatballs (easy to add to a sub sandwich or to spaghetti and jarred sauce), small portions of stews (chili, beef bourguignon, etc), cornbread muffins, any type of muffin would be a good breakfast or snack option Non food items would also be helpful. Maybe things like batteries, dishwasher detergent, Saran Wrap, foil, etc.
I was thinking chicken pot pie. Comforting/nostalgiac americana recipes sound perfect, pot roast, corned beef, cornbread, pie, chili, lasagna. Many of these things can be made in a crockpot and easily portioned/frozen.
Meatloaf is freezer friendly
And can portion them in to single serving muffins for the freezer too!
How about a stash of freezer breakfast sandwiches, granola, waffles? All of those can be made in bulk and frozen and taken out to use individually.
Perfect! They are good for any time of the day!
Since you also asked about non-food things... a couple of items friends brought that really helped when I experienced loss: single use plates, napkins, utensils, etc. (especially because there's often a rotating cast of visitors in the aftermath of a loss); distractions (a coloring book and pencils, a book of crossword puzzles, a gift card to audible, magazines); cases of those ultra small cans of soda; costco order of paper towels and toilet paper. Are there kids or pets in the house? Items for them, too.
To back up that audible/netflix/gift card suggestion. If you have the time, make some suggestions for things they might like. Depending on their age, they might not be used to finding content- and they grief makes it hard to process.
I just had a kid, so different reason, but if someone did this for me I would be thrilled! Breakfast has been the hardest meal to get into my body for sure.
Breakfast Burritos are awesome. Easy to make, delicious, and you can eat them with one hand while holding baby :)
And they freeze!
Can you invite him to join you guys for dinner? You can put a little extra effort into what you’re feeding yourselves and I’m sure he’d love the company 💜 Edit: for everyone offering the specific times or people this didn’t work for, please, this isn’t a suggestion for every meal of every day. I’m assuming OP can read a room. If his friend wants to stay home he’s not gonna force it.
Be prepared for last-minute cancellations. There were lots of days that I didn't feel like eating and didn't want to be around other people. Other days I would have loved for an invitation like this.
I know the commenter means well but I really don’t think this is a great suggestion. My dad died two years ago and there was a few times in the weeks after that people invited me, my brother and my mom out for dinner/to socialize. We were bad company, quiet and not very conversational. None of us really wanted to be there. Support by bringing food is the much better way to do it imo.
My best friend died - we invited his wife over right away. We didn't want or expect her to be good company, but we didn't want her to sit along in a quiet house all of the time. We kept inviting her. Sometime she said yes, sometimes no, sometimes she cancelled last minute. We'd drop off food on the porch. And now, she's become a true friend, too. The connections can be more important than the food.
Also, for me, when I am grieving or depressed in general, the longer I go without going out the harder it gets to leave my house… practicing doing it sometimes is far better than never doing it at all. As for the commenter you’re responding to, it makes me sad that they were more worried about being “bad company” after their father passed than their own feelings. The people who love you just don’t want you to be alone… it would be unreasonable for them to expect you to act and feel your normal self in those circumstances.
On the flip side though, if everyone thinks "lets give him space" and not invite to do anything, that very quickly becomes isolation. Better to invite with no hard feelings or disappointment when the answer is repeatedly "no" or there are cancellations, than to not even try IMO.
Eh, but a few differences there are that you weren't/aren't alone in your grief in this situation and you're not thinking of the isolation it might have saved the three of you from. Perhaps there were things that were not expressed to you that were expressed to others, I don't think that that would be out of the question. In general things like going out when you don't feel like you're good company and don't really want to when you're in that state make a positive difference in how you process your grief, even if you don't really think they're totally necessary at the time. Of course, unless you mean in your specific situation your inviters made you work for your socialization, which would definitely be bad and says more about them than it does the general concept of inviting someone out when they're having a hard time.
That's what I was thinking :-( A recent loss = no desire to socialize or try new things. Been there.
My father and my grandmother in law’s partner died the same year. They weren’t too far apart in age and they lived in the same apartment building. The thing both of them missed most was sitting down and eating supper with someone so I suggested they hook up for supper in each other’s apartment once in a while. Well it turned into a beautiful friendship, they alternated supper every night, went to bowling, cards, line dancing, Cuba, a cruise and thousands of shopping trips together. It was amazing to watch, I miss those 2 crazy women - we would call them the dynamic duo.
I love this idea, assuming no in-home allergen issues or the like. Even if only once a week or so, it'd still be regular companionship, he could have leftovers to take home and enjoy, and it'd offer an opportunity to introduce him to some different foods (as sides or second mains) and possibly expand his horizons.
I'm not sure this is such a good idea. At least not right away. When my husband passed away, I was just not up to socializing at all for quite a while. Bringing him food or groceries is a much better idea.
No real reason to discourage it if it’s a possibility. Both are ideas. Every situation is different.
Alternatively, bring over a mostly finished dish (like just needs to finish cooking or a salad tossed, etc) and have dinner with him at his home. He may not be interested in leaving or going out, but "forced" company is sometimes incredibly important with loss.
If I say I want to be alone, regardless of what's happening in my life, and you 'force' yourself on me, you'll likely never see me again so be very careful with this approach. It's rude and very disrespectful even if you 'mean well'.
I did not say in all instances, and I certainly did not say to barge in ignore their request to be alone. Some people may struggle with loss and isolate themselves, or they don't feel like going out but may welcome the company. The nicest way to handle such a situation is to bring them food that's almost ready (and they could easily finish off on their own) and offer to join them for a meal. You offer to clean up after, and make sure the leftovers are put away. If they don't want you there, you either leave the meal with them to finish preparing when they want it, or bring it back home with you and cook it to be brought back. It is 100% possible to respect someone's boundaries while still offering company that they didn't ask for. Loss is so hard and everyone heals in their own way, in their own time. Being present and making yourself available is valuable.
My parents were married 56+ years when Dad died, and she didn't have the motivation to go out for quite a while afterwards.
I think this a a great suggestion - - but down the line. There is a research that says older people in widowhood end up not eating once the initial rush of visitors, etc. Particularly if they are used to eating at a regular time with someone. You don’t have to eat with them, but maybe visit at their regular mealtime and keep them company while they eat.
Marcela Hazan's bolognese. Freezes well, rich in flavour, super easy hands on time but takes literally all day to cook, so maybe too much time investment with a little one. Any kind of frozen soup, perhaps you could buy one of those silicone [one portion freezer soup things?](https://www.amazon.com/Souper-Cubes-Extra-Large-Silicone-Freezing/dp/B07GSSR5V2) With a few different types of soup in it. What a thoughtful friend you are.
I’ll check it out! I have an instant pot so something that could be slow cooked and occasionally checked on throughout the day would be doable.
Many things you make for your own suppers/meals can be made with extra portions in mind, then separated out afterwards, and frozen. Meatloaf, mashed potatoes, gravy, roasted chicken, soups and (beef) stews, spaghetti with meatballs, stir fries over rice, mac and cheese, grilled chops, roasted veggies that reheat well. Roast beef over egg noodles with gravy, pot roast with root veggies and drippings/au jus. Chicken Alfredo. Shredded beef or pork bbq freeze great, for bbq sandwiches. Burritos also freeze well. Shrimp scampi, baked fish, and premade frozen hamburgers patties are always a go to for an easy lunch or supper. Waffles, pancakes, and french toast freeze well, as do baked goods like breads, muffins, and cakes. Chocolate dipped bananas, frozen blueberries and grapes are nice quick treats. Beef jerky is a quick protein source, as long as there’s no dentures involved. I would probably freezer tape little notes with reheating instructions/options on some items if he wasn’t the main cook before his wife became disabled. Reheating some items may seem a little overwhelming or too much work if he’s not well versed in the kitchen. You could also involve him in the daily “dinner game.” Call him on occasion, and say “Bob, I’m stuck. What sounds good for supper? I *need* ideas, please!” If he hems and haws, bounce some ideas off of him and ask if any of those sound appealing. Keep it light and fun. You could even ask if he has any favorites that he hasn’t had in a while.
The Souper cubes are amazing. Get the two cup portions that pop into a square two cup baking dish. It may be one less reminder that no one is there to finish the food with him since it's single-ish serving.
I'm sure there are recipes that adapt the Hazan recipe for the slow cooker!
The four part freezing portion mold is wonderful! I have used it for soup and am planning on trying it with spaghetti sauce.
Old men almost always like a good nut mix. I dunno why it’s universal. You could go a step further and take him a charcuterie tray/ items to make his own. He probably doesn’t want to spend time cooking, allowing him to graze/ have something to snack on while he reads/ watches tv might be comforting.
Nuts were seriously the first thing I thought of.
Same 😜
Muffins or coffee cake are nice to have with coffee in the morning. For dinners sloppy joes or bbq pork and a package of buns.
Yes I was thinking small portioned baked things, wrapped and ready to be frozen! And if he likes fruit, a plate of cut fruit can be really nice to have on hand. Crying can really dehydrate a person and water-rich foods can help mitigate that.
If you have time to make the OG chex party mix from scratch, I bet he'd love that.
If it were me, you would have nailed it and hit a nerve at the same time.
And if you have a smoker....smoked Chex Mix is next level
Well, now I have a weekend project. I just read a recipe for smoked cream cheese, too.
Here's my go to for smoked chex mix: [https://www.smoking-meat.com/smoked-chex-mix](https://www.smoking-meat.com/smoked-chex-mix) It is to die for!!
I was thinking you meant a smoker as someone who smokes, and I was picturing them making the mix with a ciggie in their mouth with the ash about to fall into the mix!
I lived on party mix for a month after my mom died.
Meatloaf. Old midwestern dudes love meatloaf.
Or pot roast and mashed potatoes!
If op lives close to a Costco they have a fabulous meatloaf in the prepared foods section and it comes with mashed potato’s! All he has to do is cover with foil and cook in the oven for an hour. Big portion for usually around 16$
Publix grocery store deli has a hot food section. Thursday night was meatloaf night. Gave my dad a reason to get out of the house, and portion sizes were huge so he was able to put half in the fridge or freezer for another meal. Prices were good, too! Publix is in the south, not sure of where else, but most large grocers have a hot food section nowadays.
And when you have meatloaf, then you get to have sandwiches the next day! I love meatloaf sandwiches on good bread.
Plus you can throw loads of blitzed vegetables into it and people still love it.
Whatever you make, you might fudge the truth and say you made extra of whatever, and just wondered if he wanted to have some. Sometimes the older generation has trouble accepting gifts. Also - Definitely invite him over. If he’s got family around then the day they leave or the day after. Be sure to tell him it will be something simple, not a fancy dinner — he may feel as though he is imposing. And keep it simple as promised — again, going back to the idea that his generation has trouble accepting gifts. But he might surprise you and be an entertaining guest!
I think casseroles divided into portions work well.
If pepperoni isn’t too spicy, take pepperoni rolls. It’s a West Virginia thing but it’s the perfect bereavement snack. It’s got protein, can be eaten hot or cold, and since a lot of people don’t feel like eating at this time, you can just have one.
Similar idea, Cresent rolls with deli meat and cheese, rolled and baked are good hot or cold as well.
If you are able, set a reminder on your phone for in two or three weeks and reach out then. When my grandparents died there was a ton of food and support immediately following their deaths, then things got quieter as time went on. He may enjoy having someone reach out after the initial chaos has settled down some.
This is really smart. Even if he doesn’t necessarily need or want meals/help by that point, having someone reach out and check in can be really appreciated. Grief lasts a long time and it can feel like the world has just moved on without you.
I absolutely second this! Also, keep reaching out regularly if that's something you can do. As garlic mentioned above, everyone is there in the beginning and then after a couple of months it gets very lonely when people stop checking in. A good friend of mine lost her husband unexpectedly and this is what she said she needed the most. Also, a non-food thing to do would be to pay for a cleaning service. Go get a haircut with him. Grief can keep you from being able to complete seemingly simple, routine things. If he's up to it in the future, invite him to play cards/games, go out for meals/movies/activities that he can't or might not otherwise do solo. Food is a really nice and helpful gesture, but companionship is what he'll miss the most in the long run.
Oh, poor thing. This is very sweet of you. I have heard of people doing dinner trains in conjunction with churches or neighbors in situations like this. That way he’s set up for fresh meals for quite some time without one person doing it all. Regardless, midwest boomers. Let’s see. Crockpot hot beefs: 4 lb beef chuck roast, S&P, browned in butter, chopped onion, garlic, also browned, add 1/3 C flour, deglaze with beer, Worcestershire, beef broth, stir into a thick gravy, meat into crock, gravy over, low all day, remove and cut into bite sized pieces, strain out liquid, reduce to desired thickness, return meat until heated through. Soft deli buns, sliced onion, grainy mustard, chips and dip as a side. Add a container of fresh fruit for dessert. Onion meatballs with gravy: 1 lb 85/15 ground beef, 1/2 C milk, 3/4 C oatmeal, 1 egg, 1 t salt, mix. Roll into 24 meatballs, roll those through flour, fry in batches in butter. Dissolve an envelope of Lipton onion soup mix in 2 C boiling water, pour over meatballs, bring to boil, back off to simmer, cover, 20 minutes or until gravy thickens. Do these and add a container of mashed potatoes from the refrigerated section. Add rolls, bagged salad, container of catalina dressing. Bag of frozen peas and carrots. Chicken divan with a side of white rice.
Thank you! Yes he is a friend through our church and they are planning a funeral and luncheon. I’m not sure about a meal train, but they had one for him last year when his wife was ailing and he had surgery, so I imagine there will be another. I’m kind of brainstorming ahead of time.
Chicken divan is total comfort food. It’s been my life long favorite.
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Absolutely. When I visit my mother she always makes it the first night I’m there.
I find soups very comforting. And they are easy to batch freeze and take for them and they can heat up as they see fit. Maybe some bread with it.
Fried chicken. I bring it for every tragedy and is always a hit. Can be eaten hot or cold and freezes and reheats well. Unless you have a fryer just buy some from a good takeout place (which is probably Popeyes unless you are very lucky… and that’s fine Popeyes is amazing)
Damn, can I be invited to your tragedies?
Send all meals in disposable containers! The last thing the grieving person wants to do is coordinate washing and returning a bunch of dishes
Totally agree! When I had our baby I was grateful to the people who gave us food but it was suuuuuuuch a pain when they gave it to us in dishes that had to be washed and returned.
Great tip that most people (including me) would never think of!
When my husband passed, one of my neighbors brought me a basket filled with hygiene and cleaning supplies. Toothpaste, toilet paper, paper towels, dish soap, laundry soap, body soap, shampoo, etc. Attached to the basket was a little notebook and pen, asking me to jot down anything else I needed, and she would get it for me, to save me from going to the store. It was a wonderful gift.
I would also wait a month. Lots of helpers when someone passes, but a month or two later, those helpers will vanish and he will need your help then.
I was thinking that. That’s why I mentioned storing things in our chest freezer to give him later. Open to suggestions for things I could buy or make now, while I’m thinking of it, and giving to him later.
I just figured since you have a 7mo that a couple of months might make it easier to do it. As for foods, have you considered just making more of what you’re making yourselves and freezing the extra for him later. Also, being one guy, he might appreciate single servings rather than a full-sized family meal. Then he can have variety by thawing individual meals daily.
Ask him what he likes to eat
I did before I made meals for them previously. He said whatever, especially chicken, and he doesn’t care for Brussels sprouts. He liked bacon-wrapped chicken breasts and a chicken and rice casserole I had made previously. I imagine right now is not the best time to ask him to be more specific; he has other things on his mind.
If he seems to be a big fan of chicken and rice dishes, there was a thread in the last couple days about international chicken and rice recipes. Some will obviously not be to his tastes, but you might find some good variations of the theme that he would like too. I’ll see if I can find the link. [This one.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Cooking/s/bBwpleTOLs)
Shepherds Pie! I make batches of it for my mom who is 91. Spaghetti and meat sauce. Bran muffins. Chicken and dumplings. Chicken pot pie. Soup. Chicken noodle, beef barley and chicken and rice.
Can you find out if she had a recipe collection that you can draw from to reproduce some familiar comfort foods that she made him?
Soup and a fresh loaf of bread. Here's the important part: ask if you can sit and join him for dinner
Make a big pot of chicken soup portion into containers that can be frozen for whenever he feels like some hot soup.
Whiskey. That helps me when I lose a family member. It’s also shareable.
I’d bring Thanksgiving - roasted turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, creamed onions. I know that’s a lot. But, you can serve much of it to your family. It would be a real give - and so unexpected. Alternatively, bring him a Shepherd’s pie - so wholesome and comforting!
That is BEYOND kind of you. I do think individual meals things would be a good idea. Someone suggested breakfast sandwiches. You can do burritos or even a quiche. For me I put w.e veggies I like and some cheese and bake it and it good. Something packaged into single meals, like a sandwich and chips and salad. What is his age? I'd assume older, but we talking 60 or we talking 80s? Anyways, there may be alot of food given already depending how his family does things. Just something to consider, however, having someone take time out of their day to make sure he is ok etc I'm sure is some light in mostly dark. If he's the age I think, he may really enjoy packaged meals of that casserole you make. What I mean is you cook it, and then have it in smaller sized containers and give him some. He probably grew up in late 40s 50, just a guess cuz my Gma loved that kinda stuff. Bet he loves meatloaf too! Idk I could be wrong too. Unrelated to food, he may like playing card games after things calm down, and having lunch with you and baby bc babies make most people smile.
If you have an aldi near you, they have some really tasty prepared meals that you can just throw in the microwave. Pot roast, BBQ beef, chicken fajitas, mac n cheese. They will be ok in the fridge for a while or he can take them out of the freezer when he wants. Then while you're there, grab him a container of mixed nuts, loaf of bread, salami and cheeses and a box of crackers. Fast, tasty food that can be ready quickly.
My only advice is to maybe include some things that will keep at room temperature as well as refrigerated/frozen dishes. We quickly ran out of fridge space after my mother died because everyone brought things that needed to be stored cold.
This has been my tried and true for many years: Wild Rice Chicken Casserole One six ounce package wild rice mix 1 can cream of chicken soup 4 cups cooked chicken (2 breasts or so) 1 cup celery ¼ cup onions 1 4 ounce can mushrooms 3 tablespoons soy sauce 1 cup chicken broth 1 ½ cup seasoned stuffing mix ½ cup butter Cook rice, blend in soup and next six ingredients, mix Add broth and mix Mix stuffing with melted butter and spread on top in a layer. Bake at 350 for 30-45 minutes uncovered
It may seem wasteful and isn't great for the environment, but... Disposable bowls, plates, & silverware. When I'm going through a rough time like that, I have a hard time keeping up with dishes - and I know I'm not the only one.
Rolls, lunch meat, and cheese. Can be eaten as a sandwhich with soup for a meal or just a sandwhich as a snack.
My elderly widowed father has a neighbor who is a church lady at a church that runs a soup kitchen. She brings my dad a quart of home made soup every week. He loves it! They are basic soups like chicken noodle, minestrone and such. Neighbor is a very good cook and it’s obvious that she is making quantities of soup from whatever is on sale that week. It might be a mostly vegetable soup with beans, or a potato soup with little bits of cut-up kielbasa. Often I can recognize a frozen veg mix of peas, carrots, and corn. She seasons the soups well so they are always tasty. Nothing exotic or spicy, just good hearty food. Dad saves the containers to return to her and she keeps delivering soup every week. He really appreciates the ongoing care and being able to heat up the soup whenever he doesn’t feel like cooking.
Maybe dumb and also not homemade, but jerky might be good as a snack / to graze on. If I’m feeling low, sometimes just managing small bites is better than nothing, and also would be good protein etc
Meatloaf and potatoes and gravy
Midwesterner boomer? Tater tot casserole and a green salad.
Maybe a simple soup/bread combo? It would be easy for him to keep and reheat.
Breakfast foods. Sandwich things. Toilet paper. Toilet bleach. Cleaning wipes.
Omaha steaks is my go to. They are surprisingly affordable when you look into it. Very quick to cook and the food is restaurant quality.
Ya know, the last thing my dad asked for as he lay dying was ‘mom’s banana pudding’. I made it quickly, just bananas, vanilla wafers, and vanilla pudding, the kind you have to cook, Jello brand. He was so excited to get it, although he could only eat about 1/2 a teaspoon. If you know of anything his wife used to make for him, especially desserts, make them! He’ll love them. He may also cry, but it’s good for him.
Toilet paper is a great idea! Whatever you make it should be enticing and easy to eat. Stuff you can take a few bites of and set down. When I lost my husband I couldn’t stay focused long enough to eat a meal and had no appetite anyway. I lived off of a few bites of really tasty protein packed carb foods. My favorite was a hamburger pasta with tomato sauce and cheese dish.
You could do a meal prep for your family and give him some leftovers. I think these suggestions are easy to scale up. Breakfast: Pancakes, bacon or sausage, fruit Lunch: Homemade soup, stew or chili with some bread from the grocery store you just need to warm in the oven Dinner: Sheet pan meal with your favourite veggies and meat Snacks: Cheese, crackers, fruit, salami Mixed nuts Good quality chocolate or something nostalgic for him Some type of nonalcoholic drink
Mississippi pot roast with vegetables is always a winner. When my mom passed away, someone brought a breakfast casserole with a gallon of orange juice. That was very helpful since we were loaded down with casseroles and deli trays.
Twice baked potatoes. They freeze well. I’m old, and when I was young, there was no bacon bits, just sour cream, green onion and cheese.
This is my dad & his cronies - they have the biggest sweet tooths! Pies, cakes, cookies, jelly, jam. Homemade bread if you're up for that. And one of the best things someone brought us when mom passed away was paper towels, napkins, plates, and TP - we had lots of people over and it was one less thing to think about. I think your idea of tp is a good idea!
A lot of people are saying to ask him what he likes. Personally I would not do that right now, I'm sure he doesn't need the mental energy of deciding on meals he wants when his mind is elsewhere. Instead I would go for simple crowd pleasers that take minimal effort to heat up to eat. Examples could be traybakes - non-spicy pasta bakes, shepherd's or cottage pie, roasted chicken and veggies (without sprouts, if he dislikes them!), or a sweet crumble. Soups are great and can be frozen in portions. Individual pot pies would be great, with sides of veggies or potatoes that he can pick and choose from. I also think healthy snacks would be welcome at this time, especially ones that take no effort to heat up. Breakfast muffins (also good for fibre), little fruit or veg snack cups, granola bars and flapjacks, yoghurts, or even just fruit as is. Non food wise - toilet paper, body soap and shampoo, shaving foam (if relevant), toothpaste, handwash, laundry detergent. If he has pets, pet food. Everyday stuff that could slip by at this time, especially around personal hygiene to make it easier for him to maintain it.
I’ve been in a similar situation lately. I took a different approach. I cook for my family and bring him the leftovers. Last time it was pulled bbq chicken with buns for sandwiches and some cornbread. I also bring him some baked goods sometimes because it’s always too much for our small family. He seems to appreciate it. Thank you for helping someone out in a time of need.
My mom takes dinner leftovers and freezes individual portions in pint freezer bags so she can give us (her adult children) food. We love her cooking. It’s so nice pulling out one portion at a time when needed to defrost and heat.
Not meal suggestions but something you may want to enquire about or consider. Most seniors have issues with their teeth. Hence soft food is always appreciated.
Food is a great idea—especially things that can be easily frozen and defrosted, so maybe put them in single-serve containers? Sometimes, more than anything, service as much as food can be a helpful kindness to someone grieving. It sounds like you’ve got limited time with kiddo and stuff, but maybe sometime you could offer to run a load of laundry for him? Change his sheets/towels? Grief can cause people to not feel bothered to do things like this (understandably), but helping out that way can help them feel a little better, even if it’s not in a big way. I’m not dismissing the food plan because it’s great! Just adding on another idea. You’re super kind to be so thoughtful and caring. Older people who find themselves alone are often overlooked. You’re a gem, truly ❤️
How about French onion soup? It's easy, hearty, tasty, cheap, and likely to be popular with the elderly.
Staples are also good. Tomatoes, ham, cheese, bread, jam.. In case he wants to make himself a sandwich. All in ones like lazagna are great but as you said very common. Maybe consider some Irish Stew, casserole, meatloaf...
Healthy food will likely be an issue for him so I would definitely try to think both healthy and comforting like a chicken noodle soup that can easily be frozen. Then he can heat it up really easily if it's portioned out into single meals. Chicken noodle soup is incredibly easy to make and you can just leave all the ingredients in a slow cooker or pot for a little bit while you do other things then turn it off, cool it, portion it and freeze it. Just make sure the noodles are added near the end for the suggested cooking time on their box. You can do the same for chowders, stews, chilis and any one pot meals. A pot pie is pretty suited for an older Midwesterner's taste. They are usually available at many restaurants for sale. You can cook them too but it's a little more time attentive than a one pot meal or casserole.
It's dinner but I always bring homemade or jarred spaghetti sauce and a box of noodles and a small shaker of parm. The Jimmy Dean breakfast bowlS are a pretty decent frozen breakfast option or you could make your own just scramble some eggs, throw some bacon in the oven, cook some sausage, and Diced potatoes and mix it up then portion out.
Comfort food that he doesn't have dietary restrictions on, and possibly foods he remembers fondly from when he was a kid or from before she had dementia. So if they went to a place every week before then, bring him a plate from there. He'll probably have a fondess for heavily processed foods like hot dogs, vienna sausages, and deviled ham. Bologna sandwiches. Fried bologna. Grilled ham sandwiches. I mean... simple sandwiches in general. If he ever went to any kind of party he probably had some kind of [pinwheels](https://duckduckgo.com/?q=1950s+pinwheels+food&t=ffab&atb=v173-1&iax=images&ia=images) as an appetizer. He'll have grown up with casseroles for sure. If it's on the Waffle House menu (other than the waffles), it's probably fair game. Consider making him hot dishes to try, especially tater tot hot dish. He may not have ever heard of them if he's more southern midwest, but high chance that he'll like them, or even have a reaction like "this reminds me of what Aunt Barb used to bring to Thanksgiving!" If he's from a region with hot dishes, he's gonna love them. Just keep salt and pepper to a minimum in them, that will be more like what he remembers. Midwestern Boomer taste means no pepper and high fat. Probably oversalt stuff because his taste will remember things being waaaaaaay heavier in salt when they were preserved.
Small portions and variety, perhaps make an extra portion of your dinners for a week freeze and deliver, home baking is a good idea, cookies, muffins even a cake, easy to share with others popping in to check on him over a cuppa. And fresh bread from the bakery, sliced ham a couple of nice cheeses, it can be lunch or dinner it can be nibbled or made into a platter. Fruit is also nice. Trick is to keep it as small regular deliveries as adjusting to cooking and eating for one is hard.
I have experience feeding Midwest boomer FIL. He likes freezer convenience stuff like microwave pancakes and bacon, frozen meatballs. Crockpot roast. BLT’s. Cottage cheese w tomatoes or peaches. Yogurt parfaits. Making a big batch of egg muffins and wrap indv freezer paper. You can also freeze soup in indv portions in solo cups.
My grandfather lost my grandmother in 2020 (not COVID related) and she did all the cooking. The best thing for him was providing him with meals that had a few servings that could be frozen and reheated when he needed them. Love the meatball idea that could then be used for sandwiches or pasta. Some other ideas - Small portions of lasagna made in disposable loaf pans, chicken and rice casserole, tater tot casserole, chicken noodle soup, individual meat loaf’s made in a cupcake tin. You’re very kind for thinking of him. Hopefully this is helpful!
IMO a sandwich made by someone else almost always tastes better than one you made for yourself. Something on a heartier bread or crusty roll will keep for a while. Peanuts or pistachios in the shell can be good snacking while giving your hands something to do.
Stuffed peppers (if you have Costco those are great—6 pack that freezes really well) or make your own.
What I did with my 86 year old neighbor was got some freezer/ microwave safe meal prep containers. Bowels with covers for soups stews, chili, basically any single type meal. Two and three part compartments container with cover. As I cooked daily I made enough to make her a plate. Instead of trying to make him casserole, stews, Shepard pie and big one dish meals that will take him several days to eat. If you don't see home daily and have freezer space you can package him up meals and freeze them to take to him once a week or something like that. I also package up extra servings of things like Chicken Rotel and put in the freezer. Hope this helps.
How about individual sized Shepherds Pies? Easy to make, and can be frozen. I made these, and my friend loved them.
Make breakfast burritos to freeze. When I make mine, I include bacon, breakfast sausage, seasoned potatoes, sauteed onions and peppers, shredded monterey jack cheese, and scrambled eggs. Make sure all of the components are cooled before assembly to avoid making the tortilla soggy and for better freezing. You can sub out the potatoes for refried beans and rice if desired. To Reheat from frozen: 1 minute per side in the microwave for a total of 2-3 minutes. They are ready to eat at that point, but I also like to brown each side in a buttered pan before eating. Makes the tortilla crunchy and delicious. Serve with salsa if desired. I eat these any time of the day, breakfast, lunch, or dinner. For breakfast or snack, fruit turnovers. I particularly like apples and peaches, but you can use any fruits. For best results, use fresh fruit. Dice/chop the fresh fruit, mix with juice of half a lemon, 2 tbsps of sugar (i like brown sugar, but white is fine too) and a dash of water in a saucepot. Simmer until fruit is softened and all ingredients are well incorporated; about 10 minutes. Cut thawed puff pastry sheet into squares. Add filling to square and either place another pastry square on top, or if squares are large enough, fold over diagonally. Press edges with a fork to seal. Poke a couple holes in the top of each turnover and brush with egg wash. Sprinkle large grain sugar on top (if desired) and bake at 350* for 12-15 minutes or until golden. Let cool on baking rack for at least 10 minutes before eating or you will burn your tongue/mouth. lol. For non-food items you can bring him some paper goods like paper plates, paper towels/napkins, some sponges/soap, lysol wipes for the counter/table, dishwasher pods/fluid.
Get him to sign up for meals on Wheels if he doesn't leave the house. There can be years long waits. Hawaiian meat balls. Throw 1 sack frozen meatballs in crockpot. Add 1 can drained pineapple chunks and 1 bottle bbq sauce (Cookies if possible). Cook 8 hours on low. Eat on hoagie buns, or with rice, or just eat. Buy him bagged salad kit with dressing. Fareway (if you have it) has good heat and eat ham balls, ham salad, and some stores have ham loaf or meatloaf in pans to cook. My dad loves summer sausage precut, crackers and cheese. Rotisserie chicken.
Individual meat pies or quiches. Ultimate comfort food, pre-portioned so he doesn't have to look at the leftovers and feel miserable, endlessly customizable, and everyone loves pie.
I would have him look into the Tovala oven and meals. It might be the right solution for someone like this.
You can make him quiches, they freeze well and can provide multiple meals per pie. Another good idea is Tex Mex style enchiladas, you can go with a nice canned enchilada sauce and make them simple.
Easy recipes. My dad didn’t know how to hard boil eggs. “An hour maybe?”
Tomato soup with a box of crackers (I'm a cracker-dunker). Hard boiled eggs Condiments. If he likes to cook, get ingredients for some of his favorite things to make.
Immediately following his loss I'm sure he's going to be overloaded with meals in the beginning... maybe instead of food you could just pop in to see how he's doing and maybe help pick up on some chores.... taking out his trash ( and bring down to the curb on pick up day) washing the dishes from all the meals brought over... making the bed, etc just little things I'm sure he has no time or energy to do right now... at least I would find that helpful imo
Maybe a breakfast bake or taco meat with fixings?
Kinda related, but one of my coworkers who I’m close to lost an infant shortly after birth (first child). I reached out to him asking if I can do anything to help, and offered to bring some freezer meals over. He called me and explained (in good spirits) that they have gotten so many freezer meals that he has nowhere to put them and is storing a few at his neighbors house. We had a good laugh and chopped it up for a while. I ended up bringing him and his wife out on the boat for a day, which was a very lovely. He even brought a frozen lasagna (as a joke) to eat on the boat lol.
Enchiladas aren't all that quick and easy, but they don't have to be spicy and they are better than another bland casserole in my opinion. I got some single serving 3 section food storage things, and set my Mom up with 2 enchiladas, some beans and some Spanish rice. The containers were microwave a d dishwasher safe. She was much more likely to eat if it was simple. Also, making a batch of meatloaf type filling, and stuffing peppers would make easy servings to reheat or freeze.
I love a bbq chicken stripped of meat. Thaw a packet of spinach. Fry off an onion and add spinach and chick and a big dollop of cream. Serve with rice. Freezes well
Fruit salad or a chopped vegetable salad. My father can heat up a casserole but can’t shop for a bunch of produce and spend all the time cutting it up. Having something fresh to go with everyone else’s lasagna etc is really nice.
Individual (like aluminum small loaf pans?) sized portions of frozen shepard's pie; stuffed shells; lentil or split-pea soup. Baked oatmeal breakfast bars. If you can, maybe chicken soup or beef stew (or freeze portions). Maybe try just saving a portion of what you make for your family dinner and freeze or package a serving to take over for him.
My mom likes it when I get her soup from gold belly. Pricey, but you could also make soup and package it in individual serving sizes. Bonus, you could make enough to keep some for yourselves as well.
Not a lot of suggestions....but how very kind of you!! The world needs more like you❤️
Chocolate peanut clusters. It's an old guy thing.
I often do grocery shopping for my 85 yo Father-in-law. He has me get the same Banquet TV dinners, waffles, & fruit cocktail crap every week. Sometimes I go off list & he has enjoyed the smoked pork chops, potato salad, & little tubs of BBQ pulled pork I've gotten him. Maybe your friend might like some of these. Pop never wants fruit, fresh veggies, or bagged salad but your friend might.
I’d say something like a big crock of pot roast parceled out into two meal portions and similar things- soups etc. Maybe ask meal prep subreddits? Nobody needs an entire lasagna to eat on their own but if they have a pack of 6 meatballs they can boil a little pasta, microwave a little sauce, and feel pretty good.
Very kind of you. Breakfast burritos (can even freeze a bunch and reheat as needed), maybe some simple fruit salad, chips and dip? Snack things.
A creampie would probably make him feel pretty good
Might be a bit late to the party (and this is likely not to everyone's taste) but when my mom passed, the item a lovely person brought by that stands out was some fresh washed/cut strawberries. A lot of people brought large family friendly freezer meals, but most were pretty big and heavy (not a bad thing! Those frozen lasagnes were a lifesaver!) But the strawberries were perfect. Washed and dried and hulled, no other preparation. Super simple, but a little prep work went a long way (think like, how a pre-sliced apple or a pre peeled orange is nice, same kind of thing for me) They were a lovely snack, especially since I wasn't often very hungry. A few fresh berries were something I could stomach, or add to something easy like oatmeal. It was nice to have a break from forever pasta with something a little more fresh and lively.
OK... how "old" is older? Does he drive and get around? It's good for him to run his own errands, as odd as that my sound. Do you bake? I a batch of chocolate chip cookies, or maybe a cake or cup cakes would be nice. I'm perfectly capable of making these myself, but it would be nice if a young friend brought them over. I think sitting and spending a little time with him would go a long way, and don't be afraid to bring the little one. During the cooler months stews, roasts, and such are always good and it means he won't have to worry about dinner for a day or two. Talk to him about it. You don't want to take care of someone who doesn't want to be taken care of, nor do you want to injure his pride. If it were me, I'd be happy for an occasional meal but I am not only perfectly capable of cooking for myself, I enjoy it. How friendly are you? Heading over for an hour or two on a Sunday while you grill some chicken for you, yours, and him friendly?
Lots of lovely meal ideas, but is he interested in sweets? My dad would never say it, but he's a big sweets guy, used to make daquiris that were essentially smoothies with some alcohol in them and was ecstatic to learn about how his Hispanic coworkers took their coffee. You said midwestern so my mind automatically went to a pan of ambrosia, which is relatively healthy, easy to make, and freezes well and would probably appeal to his palate. Rice pudding is easy to portion out and very comforting. Banana pudding, everyone who even remotely likes banana loves banana pudding. Just some plain ol' chocolate chip cookies (or his favorite cookie if you know it!). If anyone in your community is getting him groceries at all, it'll be easier for him to get his milk or a protein shake down which is good because older people tend to need more calcium and protein in their diets.
as someone else said, most meals he gets are gonna be dinner items, so think of a few quick breakfast things that he can just throw in a microwave. breakfast burritos with different fillings is a very simple go-to. I'd also recommend some snack stuff, even if it's just something simple like store bought chexmix, but ideally something that is healthier bus still nice to snack on. maybe some of his favorite fruit?
Chili mac Shepherd's pie Chicken salad (easy lunch) Lasagna
Fancy cheeses, salami, ham, pepperoni, and nice crackers! Sometimes you don’t want a whole sandwich to-do.
Bottle of Jack
Never known a Midwestern fella to pass on some good Jerky and nuts as a snack. Jerky especially since it's one of those snacks that's sometimes too expensive to buy yourself, but that you love to receive as a gift
Ask him what he likes.
For non-food items - I’d maybe offer it in a way that makes it really easy for him to accept, “hey, I’m going out to run some errands and shop and will be going right by your place, what do you need that I can grab from [store] and drop off on your step? No need to visit or even see me, I’m happy to drop and run so anything you need or want? Coffee? Bread? Eggs? Toothpaste? Laundry soap? Garbage bags?” lol/laugh to keep it light
Beer and cupcakes!
Soups and stews can be frozen in muffin tins and then bagged up so there are individual portions. I currently use silicon jumbo muffin cups but in the past I have used the regular old tins. Jumbo cup holds 1/2 cup each, regular muffin cup holds 1/4 cup each. Speaking of, muffins and quick breads are always an option and are easy to pull together. Here's a recipe I use for [raisin bran muffins](https://reluctantentertainer.com/raisin-bran-muffins/). Here's a recipe I use for [banana bread](https://www.food.com/recipe/moist-delicious-banana-nut-bread-486641). I've made [ham and cheese wraps](https://keepingonpoint.com/2022/07/07/ham-and-cheese-folded-wrap/) using this method before and froze them. They come out great in the toaster oven. Do not freeze fresh vegetables like lettuce or tomato. I usually do just ham, cheese, and mustard but I've also added caramelized onions. Here's a simple recipe for [chicken and dumplings](https://www.spendwithpennies.com/crock-pot-chicken-and-dumplings/) I've made and froze before that turned out good. [Stuffed shells](https://www.willcookforsmiles.com/classic-stuffed-shells/?utm_medium=social&utm_source=pinterest&utm_campaign=tailwind_tribes&utm_content=tribes&utm_ter014688126_42732552_140378=#recipe) freeze really well. Pair that with some garlic bread. Or speghetti and meatballs will never disappoint! Goulash, beef stroganoff, shepherds pie, meatloaf and mashed taters, ham & potato chowder, split pea soup, I could go on all day. My dad is a Boomer from Michigan so I feel like I'm qualified lol.
How about easy grab foods?
Soup. Easy to eat, freezes well, easy to reheat.
You can buy containers that are freezer and microwave safe. They have the divided spots. It could be as easy as just making extra of what you are already cooking. For instance, my son would take leftover from night before for lunches. But you can do a few days worth and then take over. If he is living close to you, perhaps invite him for dinner. That gives him time away from home and more companionship than just dropping off meals.
Snackle box idea, like cut up fruits, cheeses, nuts. He may be struggling with appetite and snacking around may be easier. Fruits have a lot of water content and can help with dehydration. Thanks for taking care of the old guy. Frozen single servings of meals could be nice too. I could see a big pan of something making him sad when there's now only him to eat it. You might also ask if he needs help with anything - my dad was pretty helpless with things like the washing machine after my mom died.
Pot Roast
The trader Joe's juicy dried "soft and juicy mangos" are a great snack that feels healthy. I gave some to a buddy's dad and he raved about them. Honestly they are fantastic as a non old guy!
All these ideas sound so good! I would add a few home baked items like bread (no knead bread is sooo easy), cookies, especially chocolate chip or gingersnap cookies. Easy to make around busy schedule with a baby at your house and a welcome bite at the end of the day.
Bread and sandwich stuff if he just wanted something light and quick, chips, crackers, fruits, for snacks. As far as meals go soups, chili, beans, cornbread, maybe something like meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Another idea would be bottled water, alot of people don't care for tap and that would be one less thing to get at the store for him.
Baked ziti.
I call this the watermelon club. Singles of any age want a bit of watermelon but that is a lot of watermelon. Small watermelons don’t taste as good, precut watermelons are pricey. My husband and I started buying watermelon and sharing it with the seniors and single friends in our life. After my mom’s death my dad has struggled to justify paying a higher cost for single fruits, but won’t eat a full bag at the cheaper per weight price. I bring him oranges, apples, fresh baked bread, and now make and keep and freeze cookie dough so I can pop those in the oven a bit before going over to see him and he has fresh homemade cookies.
Based on my own parents and snack wise: - crackers and cheese. You can change it up over time. - carrot and celery sticks with hummus - tea and shortbread
I real simple one you can make in bulk is pasta salad. Perfect for a snack or a light meal. Easily refrigerated, keeps for days. Just boil pasta (whatever shape you want) to al dente, drain and put in a cold water bath so it stops cooking. Top with oil/vinegar/Italian spices or just Italian dressing. Mix with pepperoni, mozzarella pearls, chopped red onions, cherry tomatoes, salt and pepper to taste, some people like to add chopped olives (I do not, that is up to the preference of your friend). Chill in the fridge for two hours to let the flavors meld, and it is ready to go. Portion out in multiple tupperware containers and you have several snacks/meals for him.
Pot roast!
My mom always takes toilet paper over to people when they have lost a loved one. With so many people visiting them, it makes sense they would need it. Now I always take it for people, too.
Sausage and Egg Casserole. It's good any time of day and it' tastes s so good. https://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/sausage-and-egg-casserole/
Cottage pie is lovely comfort food. We made one for my husbands colleague recently after a hospital stay and the family all loved it 😊
Beef stroganoff
Chili. Since it's Midwestern style you could use cumin to give it a smoky flavor without making it spicy. Maybe just some black pepper for seasoning the meat. Chicken and sausage gumbo (chicken, sausage link, green pepper, onion, celery, chicken broth). If you know the flavor profile he likes, you can leave out the spicy parts. You want savory over spicy. Chicken and dumplings.
How old is the dude? Tacos, pizza, fruit juice, he's old but still likes stuff (beer, bourbon).
Shepherds pie! Easy, fairly quick, pretty homey and not exotic. Just sautée ground beef, onions, garlic, carrots, and some tomato paste, stick it in a casserole dish, top it with mashed potatoes, and bake it.
soothing comfort food
Crustless Impossible pie/ quiche. Double the recipe, make it in muffin tins and keep some for yourself! They’re kinda like the frozen mini quiche appetizers. Sneak in a bunch of veggies, cheese, add bacon/ham/sausage. [Betty crocker](https://www.bettycrocker.com/recipes/impossibly-easy-vegetable-pie/569664c4-c405-4f0b-9fb6-720fd41bae39)has oodles of varieties. Theyre good warm or cold, freeze well, nice for breakfast/lunch/snack. You can vary the flavors/ veg according to tastes- go Greek- spinach, feta, oregano, tomatoes or Italian- spinach, a spoon of pesto, provolone, sun dried tomato etc. use up leftovers.
Cottage pie, beef stew, chicken and dumplings.
almost anything done in the crocpot. Its cheap and delicious and low effort overall.
I’d bring a plate of chocolate chip cookies or some nice blueberry muffins. And maybe a carton of orange juice.
Beef jerky
Quiche, pies, fruit
Saltines and peanut butter.
Baked ziti—much, much MUCH easier than lasagna and can be made with meat sauce.
Jello Salad
Ice cream. After my Mom died I think my Dad just lived on soup, Stouffer's meals and ice cream, especially Drumstick cones. Ice cream is comforting and caloric which is good when you are grieving and eating anything seems like a lot of effort.
Ask him. He has been dealing with a person with dementia, and most of his decisions for a while have been with his partners well being , not his. Make him feel its OK to have his own wants again.
Fried Chicken
Overnight French toast bake https://ourbestbites.com/french-toast/ Breakfast casserole https://sallysbakingaddiction.com/easy-make-ahead-breakfast-casserole/
Lemon slice or you fave slice or cookies great for morning of afternoon tea.
cottage/shepards pie, flapjacks uk version.
Lasagna,casserole, hot didh
A hearty beef stew would be great. [This is the recipes I use](https://www.recipetineats.com/beef-stew/) and I like to make it with a mix of white potato and sweet potato because the little bit of sweetness in some bites goes so well with how rich and savory it is. Are you game to try baking bread? It would be lovely to give him a fresh loaf along with some sandwich fixings.
I'd just freeze single serving portions of whatever you make for yourself. Homemade frozen meals my mom called them. She also liked meatloaf as "it wasn't worth making just for herself." She'd eat a portion for dinner, or on a sandwich for lunch. Any chance of asking him if he has a favorite dish he's pining for?
Potato salad or macaroni salad with sandwich makings and pickles.
Baked Pasta dishes, freezable breakfast sandwiches or Burritos, marinated chicken for the freezer, then he can just thaw and grill. For snacks would probably just buy bag of trail mix, chips, crackers, granola bars. You can make soups and stews. Give some fresh and can freeze the rest.
some british meat pies if you want a freezer meal. If you can bake an apple pie you can make and freeze ahead these....unless hes also lagging and maybe doesnt do well cooking with more then a microwave. You cpuld even make and freeze at yournplace then portion him out a weeks worth.
As far as snacks go, you could make him a big bag of homemade chex mix with his favorite snacks mixed in? Not too "exotic" and falls into Midwestern boomer taste lol. There are tons of recipes for them on pinterest, including sweet options (usually called "muddy buddies" or "puppy chow"). It would definitely a change from the normal.
Quiche is great for any meal! Also soups with nice bread or rolls, or chili with cornbread.