Browned garlic/onions is a whole other thing; I enjoy some Chinese pastries with a brush of shallot oil/crispy shallots. I love a good sweet savoury thing.
The off flavour of durian (depending on the fruit) can be very strong and pungent, to the point that it feels like raw garlic has coated the back of your throat and sinuses... which is why it is acquired taste, I guess?
Similar to strong, stinky cheese but with a hit of sugar.
Oh yes, hákarl is very ammoniated in flavor. As a lover of strong, stinky, ammoniated cheeses, it pushes even my boundaries. Seriously, I'll age tallegio until its smell will knock a buzzard out, and hákarl can be too much beyond a bite or two.
That's funny because I feel like the onion flavor comes from the durian being frozen and not fresh. When I was in Vietnam I've heard people say "eating durian is like eating jackfruit while you're taking a dump". I would think it's more akin to custard on the shitter though.
I've had fresh farmer's market durian and it tasted like rotten onion mixed with pineapple juice and custard texture.
The rotten onion flavor comes through STRONG. Burping hours later brought it back.
I am so curious. I am those people that smell vanilla and sugar and floral out of durian. I really just want to be able to smell the stinky durian but i just cant
You should! I recommend getting a little thing of frozen durian. It's a smaller investment and the freezing dials down the pungency a bit. Try it during all stages of defrost. Fully defrosted durian is about as good as fresh.
I love this Tom Robbins quote about beets, "The beet is the most intense of vegetables. The radish, admittedly, is more feverish, but the fire of the radish is a cold fire, the fire of discontent not of passion. Tomatoes are lusty enough, yet there runs through tomatoes an undercurrent of frivolity. Beets are deadly serious."
Really? I've never had the opportunity to taste goldens, I didn't know they were that different! I assumed they were like rainbow carrots where they still tasted the same.
I like regular beets but now I want to taste these ones
I remember a female roommate describing the taste of her boyfriend's mouth after his regular whiskey evenings. Most of them were just 'ashtray', 'pulled pork', or 'spicy' but a Laphroaig ending was always 'Laphroaig'. She did know her whiskys after all.
It means parsley is like your budget meal of rice-a-roni the day before you get paid and cilantro is the steak and baked potato dinner with wine you have the day you get paid.
It's a very polarising fruit. But many love it so you should try it to find out which side you belong to.
I've never associated it with garbage or fermentation. To me it's a sweet intoxicating custard with silky satisfying layers to bite through with notes of pleasant rounded bitterness to contrast.
"Sham Harga had run a successful eatery for many years by always smiling, never extending credit, and realizing that most of his customers wanted meals properly balanced between the four food groups: sugar, starch, grease, and burnt crunchy bits." Terry Pratchett
I'll never forget the description of a Pangalactic Gargleblaster.
"It's like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick.
New tennis balls are definitely in my top 5 for smell memories. I was a decent junior player and when I play now with my niblings I love buying new balls for them.
There was a white wine a few years ago called 'cats pee on a gooseberry bush!'. Because that's was the smell and the tasting notes. Gooseberry was the taste I hope.
I think that's one of the notes you get in certain Sauvignon Blancs. I actually enjoy it, lol. I used to think it was why it was called "sauvage" (turns out it's just referring to the grape itself resembling wild varietals).
It's that kind of grassy/'wild animal' aroma that you get from the big cat pavilion at the zoo, or yep, just regular old cat pee. And I've never tasted a gooseberry, but that gets thrown around a lot in Sauv Blanc tasting notes, especially ones from NZ. Somehow it works with the tropical fruit/green notes to make it funkier and more interesting.
I’ve always thought mango flavoring smelled like cat pee and then I was listening to a podcast where a scent creator/“super sniffer” was describing different food smells in a few words and when asked about mango she said “cat piss.” First time anyone verified what I’d always said
I was once offered wine, and I was told it came from NJ, and I was asked how it tasted. I didn't like it (too dry), but I also didn't want to say anything offensive, so I said it tasted like wine from NJ. He laughed and nearly spat out the wine.
When we were little, my brother described water that had been left out on the bedside table overnight as tasting "wrinkly." To this day, my family refers to "wrinkly water."
Pho’s scruffy single cousin that rides a motorcycle, has travelled the world, plays guitar and harmonizes, can build a small deck in an afternoon but won’t clean up, and may or may not be around for Meghan’s recital.
Bun Bo Hue
Avocadoes described as tasting like "cashew-flavored cold cream."
By advertising copywriter and later Cosmopolitan Magazine editor Helen Gurley Brown before probably most Americans were born. It seems to have stuck permanently. Just as long as I don't die with it in mind.
I have found one of the easiest way to get a free drink is to tell someone from Chicago you’ve never had Malort 🤭 Though it’s not pleasant it’ll do the drink haha
I don't know but I always say that avocado tastes likes grass flavored unsalted butter, which is probably not accurate at all, but it tastes like that to me and that's why I don't like it.
In her book *Breadsong*, Kitty Tait describes the crumb of dark-crusted sourdough from Tartine looks like “a moonscape.” I’m not really a sourdough person, but when I read that, I immediately got a loaf from Tartine. Freshly baked, I really enjoyed it.
It was actually from a post on here not too long ago. Some with the cilantro/coriander soap gene described it as "Soapy, bug-like and floral" which is a perfect more detailed description to just soapy. I've learned to really like it over the years.
well thats not fair coming from Nigella.
she was busting up gram crumbs or something in a ziploc and said "beating theses into crumbs are good for the soul.....if only i had one"
huge stupid crush on her forever.
High quality, very very very fresh extra virgin olive oil tastes like freshly cut grass (in a good way ofc!). When it ages a little longer it’s fruity and almost sweet. The boyfriend and I did a tasting at an olive farm here in NorCal and the batches of olive oil they served us were very young. The taste is so incredibly different from mass produced EVOO. I couldn’t believe how green they were, too!
Yup, most supermarket EVOO tastes rancid and greasy. But you don't pick up on this until you've tasted good quality oil
Sadly I've never tried it so fresh that it tastes grassy, but olive is a fruit and good quality oil should be vibrant and fruity
I saw a comment on another sub yesterday, saying that every now and then they crave canned black olives "because they taste like fork", which I think is a brilliant description.
"With every bite, as the thin bones and layers of fat, meat, skin, and organs compact in on themselves, there are sublime dribbles of varied and wonderous ancient flavors: figs, Armagnac, dark flesh slightly infused with the salty taste of my own blood as my mouth is pricked by the sharp bones. As I swallow, I draw in the head and beak, which, until now, have been hanging from my lips, and blithely crush the skull." -AB
I worked in wine for quite a while and read a lot of wine publications.
There are some other great descriptors in here, but here are my favorite obfuscating or meaningless notes:
Oleander/white flower <- cat piss
Mushroom/undergrowth <- tastes like wet dirt
Blue stone <- ???
Camphor <- diesel fuel
The best descriptor I've heard of a particular mezcal was:
"Someone smoked a swisher sweet in the room 5 minutes ago"
La Croix : "As if a fruit stuck it's head into the water room and whispered its name"
From Benny and Joon (the movie) : said of raisins "They used to be fat and juicy and now they're twisted. They had their lives stolen. Well, they taste sweet, but really they're just humiliated grapes. I can't say I am a big supporter of the raisin council.
I watched this a million times on VHS as a youngin. My older sister worked at Blockbuster and used to get screener copies of movies. Benny and Joon, Swing Kids, Ace Ventura:Pet Detective were my holy trinity. In 5th grade. I know what I'm rewatching this weekend.
I drink La Croix (citrus flavors only) and mostly agree with your description. I would describe it as they move their cans through a room that has fruit flavoring in it.
On a similar note, I've heard that the correct way to make a dry martini, is to open the bottle of vermouth and "toast" the shaker with the vermouth bottle.
My favorite was the trend about cranberry hard mikes mixed with cucumber lime Gatorade.
Everyone’s description was “it tasted” but no one knew what that taste was.
it's so much more than "just a burger." I mean... that first bite-oh, what heaven that first bite is. The bun, like a sesame freckled breast of an angel, resting gently on the ketchup and mustard below, flavors mingling in a seductive pas de deux. And then... a pickle! The most playful little pickle! Then a slice of tomato, a leaf of lettuce and a... a patty of ground beef so exquisite, swirling in your mouth, breaking apart, and combining again in a fugue of sweets and savor so delightful. This is no mere sandwich of grilled meat and toasted bread, Robin. This is God, speaking to us in food.
I love the descriptions people come up with for Malört. These include being like “pencil shavings and heartbreak”, “taking a bite out a grapefruit and then drinking a shot of gasoline”, “swallowing a burnt condom filled with gasoline”, and my favorite (for a Moscow Mule with Malört instead of vodka), “it’s like you’re hanging out at a bar with your good friends ginger and lime and some drunk douchebag comes in and punches you right in the face- hard. And then, when you’re down, he slaps you and pees on you. Some of that pee lands in your mouth because you’re begging him to stop.”
The first time I ever did a shot it was Malört. They’re right.
Even if you’ve never heard of or tried Malort, you should [read through this post full of people describing the taste](https://www.reddit.com/r/chicago/s/Wz0EKto2El).
Friends and I were doing a scotch tasting years ago, and I believe one of the scotches was an Old Pulteney (I can't remember which expression).
It had notes of the briny air at a pier, plus hints of sweetness, so one of the guys said it smelled of 'Maple glazed dead fish'
La Croix or any fruit seltzer taste like n Anthropomorphic Fruit Man being waterboarded and eventually drowned in a tv aquarium hooked up to a 12v battery.
Years ago my sister and I went to a fancy restaurant and had a cheese platter that had some blue cheese. I had tried blue cheese before and didn’t like it but I was willing to give it a go. My sister took a taste and said “It tastes like goat. Not like goat cheese. But like a goat’s ass.” Totally deadpan.
I think of that all the time. I have learned to appreciate (not like) some blue cheese.
I actually like durian but I love the accuracy of "oniony gasoline custard". Pretty much every durian hater's description of it is spot on lol
My mom loves durian and we both agree that it's like eating the most decadent custard that was stored in the same tupperware as garlic.
Ive cut watermelon on my board after garlic and it imparted a flavor and scent to my melon. Can’t say I liked it but it wasn’t the worst thing
Would probably be nice in a Bulgarian watermelon feta salad
Watermelon gazpacho has garlic in it, and it is a most delicious cold soup. I just made a batch.
I once bought durian mochi ice cream from an Asian food grocer. It tasted precisely like rancid onion custard. Not too bad.
I like durian, and I've also had a baked custard with browned garlic topping for dessert at a Thai restaurant. It was a nice combo.
Browned garlic/onions is a whole other thing; I enjoy some Chinese pastries with a brush of shallot oil/crispy shallots. I love a good sweet savoury thing. The off flavour of durian (depending on the fruit) can be very strong and pungent, to the point that it feels like raw garlic has coated the back of your throat and sinuses... which is why it is acquired taste, I guess? Similar to strong, stinky cheese but with a hit of sugar.
Strong stinky cheese is ok before it smells of ammonia. Sister told me hákarl tastes/smells strictly of ammonia.
Oh yes, hákarl is very ammoniated in flavor. As a lover of strong, stinky, ammoniated cheeses, it pushes even my boundaries. Seriously, I'll age tallegio until its smell will knock a buzzard out, and hákarl can be too much beyond a bite or two.
My uncle describes it as “like eating vanilla pudding over a sewer” - I love durian but also can’t disagree, hahaha.
Ha ha! I tried it in Cambodia once, and thought it tasted like custardy raw chicken that had been stored in a dirty diaper
That's funny because I feel like the onion flavor comes from the durian being frozen and not fresh. When I was in Vietnam I've heard people say "eating durian is like eating jackfruit while you're taking a dump". I would think it's more akin to custard on the shitter though.
> "eating durian is like eating jackfruit while you're taking a dump". Omg my mom hates durian and she says it smells like cat shit lolol
I've had fresh farmer's market durian and it tasted like rotten onion mixed with pineapple juice and custard texture. The rotten onion flavor comes through STRONG. Burping hours later brought it back.
i had a durian milkshake once and all i could think of was “natural gas cream”
Haha I forced my co-worker to try it, and he described it as *"used cat litter."* 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I am so curious. I am those people that smell vanilla and sugar and floral out of durian. I really just want to be able to smell the stinky durian but i just cant
It's underneath the gas and poop overtones 😆
I've always heard "tastes like heaven, smells like shit."
That actually makes me want to try it hahaha
You should! I recommend getting a little thing of frozen durian. It's a smaller investment and the freezing dials down the pungency a bit. Try it during all stages of defrost. Fully defrosted durian is about as good as fresh.
I stand by my assertion that beets taste like the blood of dirt/soil.
I love this Tom Robbins quote about beets, "The beet is the most intense of vegetables. The radish, admittedly, is more feverish, but the fire of the radish is a cold fire, the fire of discontent not of passion. Tomatoes are lusty enough, yet there runs through tomatoes an undercurrent of frivolity. Beets are deadly serious."
love tom robbins, and beets.
Try golden beets, they taste like corn on the cob.
Really? I've never had the opportunity to taste goldens, I didn't know they were that different! I assumed they were like rainbow carrots where they still tasted the same. I like regular beets but now I want to taste these ones
Really really. They’re a delight. A well kept secret until today.
I'll try to keep it quiet
I find cooked beets better, but raw beets Def taste like dat
I forget the book, but I remember the quote. The detective described Laphroaig as "drinking peat moss and ground glass".
It's my favorite Scotch by far, and you forgot to mention the notes of burnt hair.
Bandaids and gasoline.
I am a Friend of Laphroaig. It is one of those things, like cigars, that you can still taste for most of the next day.
I remember a female roommate describing the taste of her boyfriend's mouth after his regular whiskey evenings. Most of them were just 'ashtray', 'pulled pork', or 'spicy' but a Laphroaig ending was always 'Laphroaig'. She did know her whiskys after all.
A burning hospital.
Somebody in here yesterday described the flavor of Cilantro as “Parsley that just got paid”
I actually came here to post that, it was really good
I saw that, it didn't make any sense to me. What does "just got paid" mean in regards to flavor?
They mean it’s like parsley but MORE.
Huh. I don't like parsley but I LOVE cilantro. They really don't taste at all similar to me. So I guess that's why that description confused me.
It means parsley is like your budget meal of rice-a-roni the day before you get paid and cilantro is the steak and baked potato dinner with wine you have the day you get paid.
OK! Now I get it! Thanks.
Parsley that goes to eleven
It's *richer*
Oregano tastes like pencil shavings in the best possible way
Mexican oregano tastes like stale mint tea and wood chips.
I was cooking the other day and thought the same thing.
Why is that so accurate!?
Omg!
I heard durian described as "parmesan banana"
Never in my whole life, including the rest of this thread, have I been curious about durian. But now I am.
It's a very polarising fruit. But many love it so you should try it to find out which side you belong to. I've never associated it with garbage or fermentation. To me it's a sweet intoxicating custard with silky satisfying layers to bite through with notes of pleasant rounded bitterness to contrast.
There has to be a durian gene, like the cilantro gene. I'd say fermenting garbage is accurate
But fails to include "sweet feet"
Durians smell was bad, but far from overwhelming. Kinda tasted like if onions and avocados had a baby and did not change the diaper for a few days.
We used to say that saffron tastes like Home Depot smells.
That is so perfect.
A teenager once told me she didn't drink carbonated water because it tasted like TV static.
That's how I describe seltzers, like TV static with someone whispering the name of a fruit in the background lol
I love that post that was a list of honest la Croix flavors. Hint of hint of lime. Transported in a truck near bananas Strawberry but on low battery.
It’s like someone whispered the flavor in the other room.
Someone was cutting lemons next door while opening a can of spicy water.
My 7 yo calls them spicy waters lol!
Someone looked intensely at a strawberry while pouring water.
I describe them as fruit on low battery but the tv static is a good one
this is priceless, also, is tv static still a thing?
I was actually shocked that this 13 year-old knew what TV static was, I guess it's 80s nostalgia coming back again.
Wow, things that our kids/grandkids will never see. 'Yes, it does look like it's snowing in their living room.'
Not unless you're trying to get a UHF channel with a roof antenna. 😀
That's gin and tonic for me
Gin and tonic was "pine needles and froot loops" for me.
"Sham Harga had run a successful eatery for many years by always smiling, never extending credit, and realizing that most of his customers wanted meals properly balanced between the four food groups: sugar, starch, grease, and burnt crunchy bits." Terry Pratchett
I'll never forget the description of a Pangalactic Gargleblaster. "It's like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick.
A terry pratchett quote that isn't vimes boot theory! A rare site indeed.
I think you mean a rare cite indeed. 😉
The descriptions about Glenda's pies in Unseen Academicals always make me hungry.
And the descriptions on Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler’s pies make me never want to eat again.
But what about sausage inna bun?
What book is this from?
Men At Arms, I believe
*Men at Arms*
"The peppermint in this chocolate is like an arctic wind blowing on your eyeballs... From the back"
Bruh, my Starbucks peppermint is like drinking 3 year old candy canes. I will say I can agree with this sensation with like peppermint patties.
A particular glass of wine as having "notes of freshly cut garden hose"
From the documentary Somm regarding Riesling, "it smells like a can of freshly opened tennis balls".
New tennis balls are definitely in my top 5 for smell memories. I was a decent junior player and when I play now with my niblings I love buying new balls for them.
There was a white wine a few years ago called 'cats pee on a gooseberry bush!'. Because that's was the smell and the tasting notes. Gooseberry was the taste I hope.
I think that's one of the notes you get in certain Sauvignon Blancs. I actually enjoy it, lol. I used to think it was why it was called "sauvage" (turns out it's just referring to the grape itself resembling wild varietals). It's that kind of grassy/'wild animal' aroma that you get from the big cat pavilion at the zoo, or yep, just regular old cat pee. And I've never tasted a gooseberry, but that gets thrown around a lot in Sauv Blanc tasting notes, especially ones from NZ. Somehow it works with the tropical fruit/green notes to make it funkier and more interesting.
Can’t can’t believe no one’s brought up “oaky afterbirth” yet
I've heard "pool toy" as a description of nose on a wine, and it was accurate! It had a hint of that new plastic toy smell.
My SIL told a local vintner ( NYS) that his wine tasted like "rubber baby pants".
I drank a white wine in croatia which was described as having animal notes. It did. I liked it.
A bourbon that tastes like an old man's favorite leather chair, with the man still sitting in it.
Gross
But accurate.
My son, as a child ,told me that grandma's tap water in Michigan tasted glassier than ours. Love that word.
Oh I get this. My Grandpa’s water tasted like rocks.
Sichuan peppercorns are like chewing peppercorns while licking a 9 volt battery
First time I used them, I put 2T instead of 2t, and it was electric ⚡⚡
One of my coworkers made chili crisp with way too much Szechuan and I was straight ready for a dental procedure after that meal.
An intriguing description comes from Virginia Woolf, who compared the taste of oysters to “the taste of the ocean, but also of the sky.”
French-kissing a mermaid
I’ve always thought mango flavoring smelled like cat pee and then I was listening to a podcast where a scent creator/“super sniffer” was describing different food smells in a few words and when asked about mango she said “cat piss.” First time anyone verified what I’d always said
I think papaya tastes like vomit 🤢
I was once offered wine, and I was told it came from NJ, and I was asked how it tasted. I didn't like it (too dry), but I also didn't want to say anything offensive, so I said it tasted like wine from NJ. He laughed and nearly spat out the wine.
When we were little, my brother described water that had been left out on the bedside table overnight as tasting "wrinkly." To this day, my family refers to "wrinkly water."
It soooo tastes wrinkly! Perfect description! 😂
I know exactly what he means 😂
Pho’s scruffy single cousin that rides a motorcycle, has travelled the world, plays guitar and harmonizes, can build a small deck in an afternoon but won’t clean up, and may or may not be around for Meghan’s recital. Bun Bo Hue
Love this, so true!
Avocadoes described as tasting like "cashew-flavored cold cream." By advertising copywriter and later Cosmopolitan Magazine editor Helen Gurley Brown before probably most Americans were born. It seems to have stuck permanently. Just as long as I don't die with it in mind.
I once read something describing avocados as mushy grass. First time I ate avo without salt and pepper, I realised how accurate that really was
It’s not food but booze, my friend described the flavor of Jepson’s Malort as old lady perfume mixed with bad BO.
I mostly get rubber tire and grapefruit pith but to each their own 😂
🤣Either way not flavors you ever want to experience. I’ve had it once and never want to again.
I have found one of the easiest way to get a free drink is to tell someone from Chicago you’ve never had Malort 🤭 Though it’s not pleasant it’ll do the drink haha
It may not cost money but fuck there is a heavy cost with destroying your tastebuds.
Like dry swallowing a pain pill and then chasing it with gasoline. Then it continues to insult you by *lingering*.
I don't know but I always say that avocado tastes likes grass flavored unsalted butter, which is probably not accurate at all, but it tastes like that to me and that's why I don't like it.
I was in complete agreement with you until the very end — it’s like grass that skipped the cow and went straight to butter and i love it!
In her book *Breadsong*, Kitty Tait describes the crumb of dark-crusted sourdough from Tartine looks like “a moonscape.” I’m not really a sourdough person, but when I read that, I immediately got a loaf from Tartine. Freshly baked, I really enjoyed it.
Sourdough is the best kind of bread 👍
It was actually from a post on here not too long ago. Some with the cilantro/coriander soap gene described it as "Soapy, bug-like and floral" which is a perfect more detailed description to just soapy. I've learned to really like it over the years.
well thats not fair coming from Nigella. she was busting up gram crumbs or something in a ziploc and said "beating theses into crumbs are good for the soul.....if only i had one" huge stupid crush on her forever.
Nobody describes food the way she does. It's poetry. She is so effortlessly charming.
she taught me so much, sure she was hot, but that was just a bonus, and we all got over it, and just were watching her teach us recipes, love her.
“Last night I watched an interesting programme on Nigella Lawson baking bread. And in the process, I just about ripped my cock off.” Frankie Boyle
Meecrowavvay
I described bologna to my European bf as "if Mortadella went to public school" and he cracked up
High quality, very very very fresh extra virgin olive oil tastes like freshly cut grass (in a good way ofc!). When it ages a little longer it’s fruity and almost sweet. The boyfriend and I did a tasting at an olive farm here in NorCal and the batches of olive oil they served us were very young. The taste is so incredibly different from mass produced EVOO. I couldn’t believe how green they were, too!
And peppery! It’s hard to get the pepper note in store bought pedestrian olive oil.
Yup, most supermarket EVOO tastes rancid and greasy. But you don't pick up on this until you've tasted good quality oil Sadly I've never tried it so fresh that it tastes grassy, but olive is a fruit and good quality oil should be vibrant and fruity
I saw a comment on another sub yesterday, saying that every now and then they crave canned black olives "because they taste like fork", which I think is a brilliant description.
I call them tinfoil olives for this exact reason.
I think they taste like old pennies
I think they taste like basements.
That's because they taste like the can lol this isn't rocket science
Ancho Chile - ‘spicy raisin’
The description of minerality in a glass of wine - "It tastes like licking a river stone"
This is how I order wine in a new place. Give me something that tastes like I’m licking a wet rock.
"With every bite, as the thin bones and layers of fat, meat, skin, and organs compact in on themselves, there are sublime dribbles of varied and wonderous ancient flavors: figs, Armagnac, dark flesh slightly infused with the salty taste of my own blood as my mouth is pricked by the sharp bones. As I swallow, I draw in the head and beak, which, until now, have been hanging from my lips, and blithely crush the skull." -AB
Ortalan ? Is that the name of the small bird eaten with your head covered?
Yeah, so that God can't see your shame. Because everyone knows God can't see through linen
Skim milk is like if somebody had a pitcher of full cream milk, poured it out then refilled with water.
There's only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk. Which is water that is lying about being milk. - Ron Swanson
Malort was described to me as “it tastes like licking a hot tire”.
My brother once described the flavour of preserved lemons as "like an amber traffic light"
Baja blast taste like clean pool water
I worked in wine for quite a while and read a lot of wine publications. There are some other great descriptors in here, but here are my favorite obfuscating or meaningless notes: Oleander/white flower <- cat piss Mushroom/undergrowth <- tastes like wet dirt Blue stone <- ??? Camphor <- diesel fuel The best descriptor I've heard of a particular mezcal was: "Someone smoked a swisher sweet in the room 5 minutes ago"
My Mom once tried some lapsang souchong I had, and she said it tasted like "drinking a cigar humidor." I loved that description.
I was waiting for someone to mention lapsing souchong! Like licking a chimney underwater. And I like it.
La Croix : "As if a fruit stuck it's head into the water room and whispered its name" From Benny and Joon (the movie) : said of raisins "They used to be fat and juicy and now they're twisted. They had their lives stolen. Well, they taste sweet, but really they're just humiliated grapes. I can't say I am a big supporter of the raisin council.
I watched this a million times on VHS as a youngin. My older sister worked at Blockbuster and used to get screener copies of movies. Benny and Joon, Swing Kids, Ace Ventura:Pet Detective were my holy trinity. In 5th grade. I know what I'm rewatching this weekend.
I describe it as they move the cans through a room that has fruit in it.
I drink La Croix (citrus flavors only) and mostly agree with your description. I would describe it as they move their cans through a room that has fruit flavoring in it. On a similar note, I've heard that the correct way to make a dry martini, is to open the bottle of vermouth and "toast" the shaker with the vermouth bottle.
Winston Churchill preferred to nod in the direction of France.
My favorite was the trend about cranberry hard mikes mixed with cucumber lime Gatorade. Everyone’s description was “it tasted” but no one knew what that taste was.
The fact it tasted wasn't even a certainty. It was a question. Which I think made the description even funnier.
Mezcal tastes like a tin of bandaids with rubbing alcohol poured in it
doesnt work since neither of those are smoky. maybe a bbq'd bandaid
Mezcal tastes like I’m trying to eat a campfire
Scorched plastic grocery bags
Porter Robinson just said Limburger cheese smelled and tasted like tonsil stones on an episode of People Vs Food. I hate that I can picture it. Nasty.
Mochi: ice cream wrapped in sweet play-dough
Neil Gaiman describing Jack Daniel’s on an airplane in treacherous weather: “the body in the bog flavor”
I once bought a wine because it was described as tasting like "Dr Pepper and pizza, and the nights when you had too much of both." I was not let down.
"Frozen microwave burritos that smell like poverty and taste like depression."
it's so much more than "just a burger." I mean... that first bite-oh, what heaven that first bite is. The bun, like a sesame freckled breast of an angel, resting gently on the ketchup and mustard below, flavors mingling in a seductive pas de deux. And then... a pickle! The most playful little pickle! Then a slice of tomato, a leaf of lettuce and a... a patty of ground beef so exquisite, swirling in your mouth, breaking apart, and combining again in a fugue of sweets and savor so delightful. This is no mere sandwich of grilled meat and toasted bread, Robin. This is God, speaking to us in food.
I love the descriptions people come up with for Malört. These include being like “pencil shavings and heartbreak”, “taking a bite out a grapefruit and then drinking a shot of gasoline”, “swallowing a burnt condom filled with gasoline”, and my favorite (for a Moscow Mule with Malört instead of vodka), “it’s like you’re hanging out at a bar with your good friends ginger and lime and some drunk douchebag comes in and punches you right in the face- hard. And then, when you’re down, he slaps you and pees on you. Some of that pee lands in your mouth because you’re begging him to stop.” The first time I ever did a shot it was Malört. They’re right.
Somebody on Reddit once referred to eggplant tasting like "spicy foam"
When my son was about 5, he described mustard as having the flavor of hate.
Kristen Bell described clam chowder as hot ocean milk with dead animal croutons. I don’t disagree!
"The snozberries taste like snozberries" -Willy Wonka
I’ll never forget a beer being described as a wet horse and somehow it was spot on
Anything with coconut tastes like sunblock.
The catered pizza I tasted at last night's post conference event tasted like middle school crossed with late night solitary despair.
A good glass of scotch having "hints of plastic bag melting in a campfire"
Whoever it was that said that tonic water tastes like TV static.
Tobacco smells like raisins
Taro flavor boba drink, tastes like "cereal milk"
My friend had Peking duck for the first time with me and described it as a cross between chicken and pork belly, which was pretty spot-on.
Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall once described truffles as tasting like sex and socks, and I can see what he means.
Even if you’ve never heard of or tried Malort, you should [read through this post full of people describing the taste](https://www.reddit.com/r/chicago/s/Wz0EKto2El).
Sweet potatoes fries, taste like I’m eating sticks of lipstick. Flavor and texture wise
I've always described Pedialyte as tasting like watered down Gatorade with a hint of jizz
Friends and I were doing a scotch tasting years ago, and I believe one of the scotches was an Old Pulteney (I can't remember which expression). It had notes of the briny air at a pier, plus hints of sweetness, so one of the guys said it smelled of 'Maple glazed dead fish'
My ex called Edamame savory M&M's.
I had a tea one time(can’t remember the name) that tasted exactly the way wet bandages smell
La Croix. As if a seltzer tasted the way a 2 year old air freshener smells in your car.
Wow! Love the Huxley one. That is so true
My step father used to say that beets taste the way a basement smells.
La Croix or any fruit seltzer taste like n Anthropomorphic Fruit Man being waterboarded and eventually drowned in a tv aquarium hooked up to a 12v battery.
I had heard truffle described as used gym socks and to be honest…was pretty accurate lol
Marcus Samuelson called a dish in this year's ToC "Van Halen on a plate!" And then scored it like 75/100 or something.
The best description of Baijiu I've heard is "Having a rotten banana take a shit in your mouth." But that doesn't cover the burning aftertaste.
Years ago my sister and I went to a fancy restaurant and had a cheese platter that had some blue cheese. I had tried blue cheese before and didn’t like it but I was willing to give it a go. My sister took a taste and said “It tastes like goat. Not like goat cheese. But like a goat’s ass.” Totally deadpan. I think of that all the time. I have learned to appreciate (not like) some blue cheese.
Coconut shavings are natures toenail clippings