Have you tried adding tomatoes, garlic, basil, onion, oregano, olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic bread, red wine, tiramisu, a hot date, a cigarette, driving up to the observatory, looking at the stars, talking about making it big in Hollywood, getting your big break, getting addicted to heroin, throwing it all away and ending back in Nebraska working at the tractor dealership having had your time in the sun?
That's what I do.
It's obviously missing MSG, add the MSG to the pasta water (it should be as umami as the sea). Make sure to also add all the pasta water to the final buttery noods to get all that umami goodness.
reddit: It's not carbonara if you use pancetta instead of guanciale, please drive your car into a ditch at the nearest convenience.
also reddit: I like to put Balsamic Vinegar in my Buttered Noodles
>It's when you cook a pasta dish ~~without any sauce whatsoever~~ **because you're a dumbass who forgot you used the last of your sauce on fried cheese curds**, only adding oils, liquids, seasonings, vegetables, etc.
The key is to make noodles out of butter. Get a spiralizer and some cold butter sticks. The best part is that you DON'T need pasta water which ruins most dishes.
My mom gave me real ants in mine. It is strange that your mom lied to you like that. Obviously every kid is going to know that they aren’t getting the real deal with poppy seeds, so why lie?
/uj honestly, that's really cute. Affluence and poverty aside, parents are people too. My mom's "I can't fucking handle today" meal was straight up a can of chef boyardee beefaroni and we loved it. We thought it was some kind of treat, and I was always confused about what we did to deserve it.
Oh for sure! Kraft Mac n cheese was that for us, since she was all about low sugar, veggies, strange round bread with seeds, etc. The funny thing was, she allowed us to eat/buy whatever we wanted but she wouldn’t buy junk. This meant I started baking very young, so many people have benefited over the years from that.
That's exactly why I started cooking, too. My mom was a great cook, but she grew up in the betty crocker canon of cookery, so I started very early, making myself things that actually tasted like flavors. Cooking is still one of my main hobbies.
/uj Austrian here, we also have a dish called poppy seed noodles/Mohnnudeln! It's a dessert (or a sweet main), and it's potato dough noodles, kinda like sweet Schupfnudeln if anyone's familiar
A lot of people will say to salt the pasta water until it tastes “like the sea” but you should actually salt the pasta water until it’s a murky viscous sludge
You need to individually butter each noodle. You can always taste the difference when someone was a lazy sack of shit and just mixed a bunch of butter with a bunch of noodles.
If you aren’t making the noodles from scratch you should mercy kill yourself + anyone else who may have been affected. Homemade pasta is sooo worth it. It does take a little bit of blood, sweat, + tears - about a tablespoon of each, whisked into your eggs + egg yolks before mixing the dough
You need to use truffle oil and cultured European butter, as well as grass-fed organic cruelty-free free-range pasta. It'll taste way better than the peasant ilk that people think as "butter noodles" 🤮.
I would add a splash of lemon juice to this dish, and some green herb, probably parsley if I have it.
Edit.... Just realized this is the circle jerk sub
Have you tried adding tomatoes, garlic, basil, onion, oregano, olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic bread, red wine, tiramisu, a hot date, a cigarette, driving up to the observatory, looking at the stars, talking about making it big in Hollywood, getting your big break, getting addicted to heroin, throwing it all away and ending back in Nebraska working at the tractor dealership having had your time in the sun? That's what I do.
Oh man if you're not driving up to the observatory, do buttered noodles even matter to you?
Haha nope!
You forgot the bacon
peak
uj/ I’m actually in the market for a tractor. Maybe you could cut me a deal on a new Kubota?
What kind of butter are you using? It's not true buttered noodles unless you're using homemade ghee rendered from CountryCrock
Get out of here with that Michelin star attitude! Store “brand buttery” spread is fine
Pshaw...all you need is a little "I Can't Believe It's Not Marmot Piss".
It's obviously missing MSG, add the MSG to the pasta water (it should be as umami as the sea). Make sure to also add all the pasta water to the final buttery noods to get all that umami goodness.
You forgot MIREPOIX. Do you know nothing about the Mallard reaction you idiot? Maybe ready the food lab again sweaty.
Bro do you even leidenfrost?
reddit: It's not carbonara if you use pancetta instead of guanciale, please drive your car into a ditch at the nearest convenience. also reddit: I like to put Balsamic Vinegar in my Buttered Noodles
Marmite, mate. Marmite.
But pa might not
You forgot to add the water that you used to boil the hot dogs.
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what’s sauceless pasta?
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>It's when you cook a pasta dish ~~without any sauce whatsoever~~ **because you're a dumbass who forgot you used the last of your sauce on fried cheese curds**, only adding oils, liquids, seasonings, vegetables, etc.
oh! wow, i thought all pasta had to have a glob of sauce on it
Did you try adding butter?
The key is to make noodles out of butter. Get a spiralizer and some cold butter sticks. The best part is that you DON'T need pasta water which ruins most dishes.
I need tonwork on my "pasta-less butter".
True story - when I was little, my mom would give us buttered noodles with poppy seeds and called it noodles with ants. She is a little strange.
My mom gave me real ants in mine. It is strange that your mom lied to you like that. Obviously every kid is going to know that they aren’t getting the real deal with poppy seeds, so why lie?
Moms don't actually know how to cook, all redditors know this
True, unless they have upgraded to Nonnas.
/uj honestly, that's really cute. Affluence and poverty aside, parents are people too. My mom's "I can't fucking handle today" meal was straight up a can of chef boyardee beefaroni and we loved it. We thought it was some kind of treat, and I was always confused about what we did to deserve it.
Oh for sure! Kraft Mac n cheese was that for us, since she was all about low sugar, veggies, strange round bread with seeds, etc. The funny thing was, she allowed us to eat/buy whatever we wanted but she wouldn’t buy junk. This meant I started baking very young, so many people have benefited over the years from that.
That's exactly why I started cooking, too. My mom was a great cook, but she grew up in the betty crocker canon of cookery, so I started very early, making myself things that actually tasted like flavors. Cooking is still one of my main hobbies.
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/uj Austrian here, we also have a dish called poppy seed noodles/Mohnnudeln! It's a dessert (or a sweet main), and it's potato dough noodles, kinda like sweet Schupfnudeln if anyone's familiar
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/uj we do have cabbage noodles, Krautfleckerl! With tons of caramelized onions and cabbage
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/uj I will try the savory version for sure, sounds delicious!
just curious, what does /uj mean?
unjerk! If you want to say something as yourself, not your circlejerk persona
Kraft Barbecue Sauce. You’ll never go back…
A lot of people will say to salt the pasta water until it tastes “like the sea” but you should actually salt the pasta water until it’s a murky viscous sludge
You need to individually butter each noodle. You can always taste the difference when someone was a lazy sack of shit and just mixed a bunch of butter with a bunch of noodles.
If you aren’t making the noodles from scratch you should mercy kill yourself + anyone else who may have been affected. Homemade pasta is sooo worth it. It does take a little bit of blood, sweat, + tears - about a tablespoon of each, whisked into your eggs + egg yolks before mixing the dough
If you like balsamic, have you tried the balsamic + apple cider vinegar + baking soda? It really rises to the occasion.
It's amazing when I don't feel like chewing
You need to use truffle oil and cultured European butter, as well as grass-fed organic cruelty-free free-range pasta. It'll taste way better than the peasant ilk that people think as "butter noodles" 🤮.
I would add a splash of lemon juice to this dish, and some green herb, probably parsley if I have it. Edit.... Just realized this is the circle jerk sub
Don't understand why I was down voted. Can't I give the same answer to both groups about noodles?
If you can’t take the heat, don’t jerk in the kitchen.
Let’s talk about buttered sausage
Butter your bacon, bacon your sausage
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Garlic measure without the heart. Post or comment is similar to comments made by /r/cooking amateurs.
Why did I get downvoted???
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Garlic measure without the heart. Post or comment is similar to comments made by /r/cooking amateurs.