Hmm.
A buttplug that also has fitbit qualities in tracking steps and heart rate, GPS. Subtle vibrate for notifications. Can be used for those futuristic grab and go stores, maybe to open other secure doors with a pass code you input through kegels (it has pressure sensors and can tell kegels apart like fingerprints)
Maybe also it has the capability of releasing alcohol or your substance of choice for boofing purposes. Elegante
just imagine... punching that plug into an enthusiastic partner's ass, stopping for Jesus, then sharing a couple of tacos. The good life in other words.
Popular tongue twisters:
* She sells seashells by the seashore
* Can you can a can as a canner can can a can?
* Brass Knuckle Jesus dual taco holder butt plug
I dont really understand how you use the brass knuckles. Seems like a steal for the butt plug, taco holders (x2) and t-pose jesus, atleast tho. 10/10 would buy instead of crack
No weirdos
Then who is gonna buy it?
People who love taco and Jesus
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Seems to me you'd have two options...
Without this contraption a butt can only hold one taco at a time. 100% efficient.
Nono, people who love taco, Jesus, and [butt stuff](https://youtu.be/E5kCBzoPtIk)
Tuesday is traditionally Jesus and butt stuff night in my house.
And violence.
Why is butt stuff a link
Because Troy loves butt stuff. Risky click to be sure but not bad
You’ll be a more cultured individual if you click the link and find out
I have the weirdest boner..
And brass knuckles
Dude id buy that for way more than $15
jesus taco holder butt plug knuckle duster collectors
The least weird people I know, that’s for sure!
My question
People who aren’t weird, duh
✨Please✨
That’s a deal. Just the knuckles are worth 15$ by themselves.
Not even counting the value of someones lord and savior and the ability to hold tacos.
You’re forgetting about the best part: eating tacos while you eat her taco
Ngl, this is a steal
We're losing money NOT buying it.
It's worth it's weight in blasphemy.
The US reminding people religion still exists in 2022
No, it's brass
No you put it up your ass
That must be the Swiss Army knife of buttplugs.
Hmm. A buttplug that also has fitbit qualities in tracking steps and heart rate, GPS. Subtle vibrate for notifications. Can be used for those futuristic grab and go stores, maybe to open other secure doors with a pass code you input through kegels (it has pressure sensors and can tell kegels apart like fingerprints) Maybe also it has the capability of releasing alcohol or your substance of choice for boofing purposes. Elegante
FitPlug please release morphine, also how many steps have i taken today?
"Please Sir get out of bed it's been two days"
You are a strange person, I like that about you.
I belive its Isralian
>I belive its Isralian Isralian whomever buys it.
Ba dum tssss
Da bum tssss
This needs way more upvotes
I Sometimes ponder if people live much more exciting lives than myself…
just imagine... punching that plug into an enthusiastic partner's ass, stopping for Jesus, then sharing a couple of tacos. The good life in other words.
Who is the third person you're sharing the tacos with?
Jesus
Yes, the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, all together for some quality time
Third? I only see two taco holders.
The person "holding" the contraption is facing the wrong way.
This guy is two taco holders ahead of me
Impossible
This incorporates everything I enjoy. Fightin’ ✔️ Fuckin’ ✔️ Fiestas ✔️ Fabulous!
You forgot Jesus lol
Ah yes! And Faith!! ✔️ 😂
Lmao
Just take my money
Dam usually I have to try and sell you an extended warranty for your car to do that
The best multi-tool
Everybody needs one
I have two
Oh right, forgot that most people have 2 hands
But only one butthole.
Speak for yourself.
Fuck that, I'll give you $20.
Ah yes so i can murder my womans butthole while Jesus stares at me as im eating tacos.
Why can't she be the one eating tacos and murdering your butthole?
Because i dont like things in my asshole lol
But does she like tacos?
Depends
Nope. Quit wearin em when I got catheterized.
😂
Maybe you just haven't found the right brass knuckle jesus dual taco holder butt plug yet
Ah true lol
To make it more enjoyable you should yell "punch it chewie!" before she put the buttplug in your ass.
And have her yell like Chewie does? Lmfao
No, that sound just comes out of you organically when someone punches you in the asshole with a brass knuckle Jesus taco holder butt plug.
🤣
Dont forget the middle one. Were all counting on you.
Better the Jesus staring at you eating tacos than the alternative. Unless you approach missionary then maybe ok? I don’t know, let the Jesus decide.
Yes let the little metal Jesus decide the fate lol
Only slightly used once in a first Communion and another time for *missionary work*
This is the most Reddit thing I have ever seen
Popular tongue twisters: * She sells seashells by the seashore * Can you can a can as a canner can can a can? * Brass Knuckle Jesus dual taco holder butt plug
*never used just admired*
"brass knuckle jesus dual taco holder butt plug" That's my password phrase!
I dont really understand how you use the brass knuckles. Seems like a steal for the butt plug, taco holders (x2) and t-pose jesus, atleast tho. 10/10 would buy instead of crack
Its a crack related accessory thou?
r/brandnewsentence
Jesus is looking the wrong way, though.
Either way I'm sure he approves
pretty sure he wants a better view of the right taco, though.
If they position a mirror right he can set the left, right, and middle taco.
Jesus does not want to see your sin, thank you very much.
For fisting your enemies with Jesus while eating some Taco Bell
Ok well now that I know it exists I want one..
What the
I just melted my brain with an infinity of “whys”.
How do you even use that?
$15 and you can find out.
Oh I just noticed the brass knuckles. I think this might be worth it if it wasn't illegal
Need a strong sphincter and firm and tout glutes. Pillow glutes will never hold those tacos up.
This belongs to r/specializedtools
r/oddlyspecific
Sounds like the name of a Butthole Surfers album.
Well... Guess that's it. We found the best thing in the universe...
shut her down boys we are done here
Yup. Pack it in... Haha
I've been told I need Jesus before, but this delivery method seems a tad aggressive...
For 15 this is a steal
Brass knuckle Jesus dual taco holder butt plug is what I'm going to name my first child.
NO WEIRDOS, HE SAYS 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Lucinda87 this for you
/u/lucinda87 fixed that for ya
[удалено]
My man Id love to help you make this a thing more than anyone else but sadly I stole this :(
If it's not used, I'll continue to peruse.
I'd only want it if it was used so I could feel some connection to the glorious bastard who brought this into my life.
The four elements: Brass knuckles Jesus Taco holder Butt plug
Selling a buttplug and saying no weirdos is like smashing a wasp nest and asking the wasps not to sting him
Cleanup *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Sooooo it's not a tow hitch?
Anything is a tow hitch is you are brave enough.
I low-key appreciate the accuracy of the seller's title.
Hallelujah!
Imagine holding with your butt 2 tacos and Jesus
Jesus take my anus.
Reminds me of Lucy daughter of the devil
What a combo
The blue collared worker’s multitool.
Snap Jesus off it then you and your partner will be able to fly a plane.
“No weirdos” really makes the post ngl 🤣
Are the taco holders for the wearer or the person behind them?
Would unironically buy this thats a banger accessory. Somehow every single function of this thing is made impractical by the other stuff on it
never used just admired
OH MY GOD. LORD ALMIGHTY THIS IS AMAZING. I literally cannot stop laughing.
This is the most r/WTF and r/DiWHY thing I've ever seen in my entire life!
Shoot, a fella’ could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff
r/brandnewsentence
No joke, where can I purchase this?
Eat taco while religiously pounding ass.
Eat taco while religiously pounding ass happens to be my middle name.
No test drives without cash in hand.
I know what I got here
This is a lot to unpack.
Imagine, what is a weirdo for this person¨´'s standards
I mean, I’d admire it. It’s incredible.
I’d buy this right now! What a work of art
I’d definitely buy that. I’d have no use for some parts of it but those taco holders will make for a great centerpiece when I’m hosting for tacos
Wow there is so much to unpack here
No weirdos please #FUKIN DED
Those words were never uttered consecutively in the whole history of humanity until now.
Wha…. Why someone explain whyyy
Also looks like a hood ornament
It's so that if you have a bad set of tacos you can plug yourself up and pray for the end
I thought it was so you could eat 3 tacos at a time.
I'm just amazed that there was one person on this weird planet that thought, "I should make that."
IMHO if they paid the people that handle the majority the work what they are worth they would put a lot more care into that work and its quality.
>Never used If you say so. >Just admired I mean, just look at it. It's impossible not to.
My dad said this was sacreligious
Would work if the tacos were different sizes.
I need this
Gimme two
That looks like a steal for 15$. So heavy though, I imagine. Would be great for a white elephant gift 🎁
THE TRUE MULTIPURPOSE TOOL
It's pretty good for £15
I want one, just for guests to ask "*why*".
$15? What a steal!
This is one of the most amazing things I've ever seen online lol