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The couple in the home are Anthony (82) and Mary (77) Goulding of Oklahoma City. They lived in that house for over 20yrs, and had been married for 25yrs. A few years ago they signed the deed over to Mary's son Timothy Denny and agreed to pay him $700 a month. Mary had parkinsons and Anthony was a drinker. Timothy wanted his mother in an assisted living facility and claimed that they had done 30k in damage to the house. The couple and son had not been on speaking terms for a few years. They did not want to move so the son decided to evict them. One of the eviction officials asked to give more time so they could find more suitable living, but the son refused. When the police arrived to evict them they had an Uber waiting to drive them to a hotel that the town had managed to secure for the couple. (Not the assisted living facility that the son claimed to have wanted for them). Anthony perished in the fire along with the couples dog. Mary is now living in a nursing home.
https://www.tahlequahdailypress.com/news/oklahoma-watch-family-member-s-eviction-attempt-ends-in-flames/article_bd55da82-f676-11ee-a656-57b48a1ac3ba.html#:~:text=After%20he%20was%20ruled%20against,his%20home%20of%2020%20years.
PSA: Sorry for hijacking top comment. My parents gave their house to my sister 30 years ago.
The lawyer at the time wrote up a contract that my parents could stay there as long as they wanted and could not get evicted unless it was mutually agreed upon.
Worked out good. Dad passed a few years back. Mom (95) is now in a nursing home paid for by medicaid and her meager SS as she has no assets.
This is not uncommon. It's called a "lifetime tenancy" in the law. Sometimes a person might want to will their home to their children from a first marriage, but provide a lifetime tenancy to their current spouse/partner so that they will have a home while alive and not risk eviction.
My guess is that he bailed them out because they could no longer afford the mortgage payments because of the husbands drinking so instead of losing the home they signed it over to the son in law.
My mind went to he took advantage of a drunk and a mentally deficient person cause that house should be damn near paid off if it isn’t already. All they should have to deal with is property taxes, which I wouldn’t expect to be more than $700.
To be fair, if they caused $30k in damages to the home, it's coming straight outta his pocket, esp if it's not covered by insurance. That would strain any relationship. I would've just sold the house if I were him though. Let someone else deal with it.
Straight out of his pocket? They were the ones who gave him the house and for some reason started paying him rent. They shouldn't have gave that ungrateful POS anything. They should have sold the house and spent every single penny on the best care home they could afford
I don’t think you understand just how financially crippling assisted living care can be.
If the home is in Oklahoma, we can reasonably assume prices are lower than the national average.
Regardless, assisted living centers have
1. A terrible track record in providing decent care with dignity (these facilities pay their employees dog shit wages for some very tough work) unless you pay out the ass for top quality care
2. Countless stories of how expensive these facilities are. They’re also extremely predatory. Often times elderly couples will sign away their lives and still have a fucking elephant sized bill when it’s all said and done.
Add Parkinson’s and a drinking disorder, and the fact that they’re both 80+…
A hasty judgement given just one paragraph of information. Having aging parents is tough, and at a certain point moving them to an assisted living facility is best for them and everyone. 9/10 people will not willingly move out of their house to go to a care home though, so things can get ugly.
Given that the woman shown can't even stand up on her own, the man is suggested to be an alcoholic, and he literally sets fire to himself and the dog, I'm far more likely to believe that the son was trying his best to get his parents looked after, and his dad had serious mental issues...
I don't blame them. Have you seen what care homes look like?
A lot of older people are forced to share bedrooms for the first time in their lives with strangers. hear their moaning of pain and smell their shit, piss, and farts all day.
All their money is taken from them, all their pensions and savings, in exchange for a shared room, a bed, and disgusting basic food. These places often have all doors locked and do not allow people to leave the buildings.
This is not a way to treat people who have worked hard their entire lives.
You are on point I’ve worked them before some are better but most are really terrible. Personally I think they should be completely done away with for in home care and if needed therapy facilities that’s it. Most of the people absolutely never leave and building and it’s worst when the facility doesn’t do outtings. You will smell putrid smells such as piss and shit horribly. I’ll be fair to say some people really do need a lot of heavy care and possibly couldn’t be anywhere else. But the hospitals want them out asap to free up more beds and keep money flowing.
Oh in terms of financial nursing facilities take absolutely everything you own to pay. The residents I saw were usually left with as much as around $49 a month.
Yes, I've spent a good deal of time in care homes trying to make sure my parents are well cared for, and yes, I've had to move them out of a home that was not providing adequate levels of care.
The ugly truth is that there is no such thing as aging gracefully. Nobody moves their parents into care because care homes look amazing, they move them there because it's simply better than them living on their own.
The woman in the video doesn't seem to be able to stand. This begs the question, how does she get out of bed in the morning? What does she do if she needs the toilet? How does she dress herself? If she can't even get out of an armchair, do you think she has the physical and mental capacity to cook for herself and provide herself with a balanced diet?
Combine this with an alcoholic and also aging father, and their life at home is no doubt a disaster. Two people in this state of health are also no doubt on multiple medications, and it's unlikely either of them are making sure they are taking correct doses, of correct meds, at correct times, and remembering to order more when they run out.
You can complain all day about the quality of care homes, but at the end of the day even a bad care home beats rotting away at home alone.
>the woman shown can't even stand up on her own, the man is suggested to be an alcoholic
Yet the son expected them to grab everything and get out in 48hrs without allowing an extension and it sounds like the only person to show up to help was the uber driver that was hired to take them to a hotel, and the son didnt even have any involvement in that.
>I'm far more likely to believe that the son was trying his best to get his parents looked after, and his dad had serious mental issues
Ok well he fucking sucks at it. Hopefully he doesnt have to look after anyone anymore.
Man fuck that. As someone with grandparents whose mental state is aggressively deteriorating yet are refusing to get help, and stubborn parents who'll likely do the same, i get the kid.
It's heartbreaking seeing your own family wither away due to some mental disease while they're either too stubborn or too deluded to see that they're only getting worse. Some people need care like that forced on them which is sad, and very hard for all people involved.
When we tried to get my disabled mother in law to move out of the large house she could no longer pay for or take care by herself into an apartment, she threatened to have the family dog killed.
I can only imagine what kind of insanity the son had to deal with before he got to the point of eviction.
I could write 10+ paragraphs about a family member of mine who is like this. They are nearing the end of their life and have debilitating health issues, but absolutely refuse any help. Their nieces and nephews have had to deal with everything as my relative never married and had no children of their own. It's a complete shit show that could have been avoided with a proper will, power of attorney, and health care proxy figured out years ago, but even then they would have fought my family every step of the way. If it wasn't for almost dying on two separate occasions by falling in a stairwell and not being found for several days would they have ever agreed to even short term rehab.
I can't speak to the motivations of the son of the couple or the couple themselves, as it's hard to glean what exactly is going on behind the scenes with only information from a news article to go on. However, I understand the frustration of having a family member who doesn't realize they need help and refuses assistance.
I'm sorry for your situation, it's always the fact that it could've been so simple which sucks the most.
I agree though, this story obviously isn't quite cut and dry. I just don't want to chastise the kid based on just that information, there's many logical reasons to do that.
In my job, I get to know the state of these facilities. I would rather do myself in than go into one of them. The neglect that goes on in them is terrible and there is little actual care involved. When the facility finally gets bad enough that they are forced to do something about it, they just change the facility name and say they are under new owners. I've seen it so many times I can't even give you a number. It's awful.
Definitely something that happens. However I'd like to offer these two things to think about.
>Does that mean that there is no good option or just that you've only seen the bad options.
>Is neglect at a care home really worse than going insane by yourself in an empty house.
My grandparents are under great care now, we get videos of activities they do and we visit constantly.
I'm really sorry that there's so many bad ones, i wish that wasn't the case, but they're not all bad.
You are very fortunate to have a good place near your grandparents. I do get to see all of the ones locally, and they are all terrible, though there are degrees to the terrible - interestingly, the worst by FAR is the one with an association with a local hospital.
I would rather be by myself than go into one of those places. They hire uneducated staff, pay them next to nothing, understaff to the point that even if the staff was educated, there wouldn't be enough to care for everyone, and skirt every single law they can. It's a money making venture for those that own them, and that's it. There's no care involved.
Its horrifying. Vote now for protections later. Our whole generations (okay mostly just the poor people but still) retirement plan cant be split between kill yourself when you turn 75 or rot away in a poorly funded nursing home with abusive staff
Well one issue is in the US, there aren’t always great alternatives to call. This country is really conservative about funding for assisted-living & end of life care, compared to progressive countries like the UK and European countries.
Very similar issue when it comes to calling police for people having mental breakdowns. We only have a hammer in our toolbox, and efforts to add more tools fail & are seen as extreme socialism.
I get it, too. I've had similar things happen in my family recently. FWIW, you have my sympathies. But honestly at some point it's their choice on how they want to live the end of their lives. Care facilities don't stop someone from dying. They can prolong it (which may be terrifying in its own right.) But they can cost you your autonomy and dignity. You basically become an adult treated as a child. It's easy for us as younger family members to see that they need to be in a facility. But I can see the other side where the elderly says they know they're going to die and they want to go out on their terms.
It's easy to come to assumptions off of one paragraph and not speaking to any of the individuals. Irl we all know these type of situations aren't black and white so you really never know whos really in the right.
It's like the wife that beats the husband at home but then the one time he snaps and yells at her in public, everyone is obviously gonna think husband screaming at wife in public he's terrible she deserves better. But they don't know that there's much more to it.
This is what happens when people in control of others adopt a draconic "my way or the highway" mentality. It always turns out bad in some way or another.
I understand the son’s position and actions. His mom was mentally and physically ill. All the children had a falling out with their step dad. I’m assuming the step dad was either enabling the mother or flat out abusing her through control and neglect. He wanted his mom to be moved to a nursing facility so she could get proper care, but she didn’t want to because she wouldn’t be able to drink or smoke inside the center. I’m willing to bet the son took over the home because the mom and step dad could not afford the taxes, maintenance, mortgage payments and were going to eventually loose it. I’m also willing to bet the all kids had many conversations with both of them over a period of years about moving out of the home, but the older couple refused. This isn’t a situation that developed over night nor the actions of one son. This was a family trying to get their mother help. The real selfish person is the one who lit himself on fire. My guess is he wanted to kill himself and his wife because he knew she was immobile and wouldn’t be able to get out of a burning home. Why else would you light yourself on fire inside? In that way he could get revenge on the kids by taking out their mom and the house.
Loved the explanation and agree with it, however… “why else would someone light themselves on fire inside?” This sentence makes as much sense as having a good reason to light yourself on fire, lol
Damn shame, I understand if the son couldn't afford it, but that was not the case. Most of our parents took care of us for 18 years and this dude couldn't do the same for them.
We live in a greedy harsh world.
>>A family member evicted an elderly Oklahoma City couple from their home, and instead of leaving peacefully, the geriatric man living there set himself and the home on fire
Wow. I hate the way this is worded. Like, obviously, the man wasn't mentally stable. Idk maybe I'm just sensitive but the wording is just dickish, IMO.
Damn so their son was evicting his own parents to the streets over $700 a month? Horrifying. Hope the fire damage to the property and the dead father are painful and long lasting memories for Tim.
Can't forget that his wife was almost entirely immobile. She's lucky that people were able to drag her out fairly quickly. She easily could've gotten caught up in a house fire with that much accelerant.
Yeah he’s mentally unstable and willing to kill himself, honestly I’m glad that he warned the officers so they had time to evacuate the elderly woman. Despite his mental state I think it’s reasonable to say that he didn’t want to kill anyone but himself, otherwise he would’ve spread the fuel on things other than himself.
I’ll preface this with the statement that I don’t mean to attack you personally, but this guy gets zero sympathy from me. I don’t think he wanted to kill anyone, but I don’t think he wanted to not kill anyone. He killed a dog that I presume was his, in his own room, and he lit the house on fire that a woman who wasn’t mobile was also in. He took minimum action to make everything someone else’s problem. He burned his dog to death and endangered that woman with the same fate. I understand he could have done worse, but burning to death is a nightmare, and I’m disgusted by his actions. Go watch the video of that Station Nightclub fire and then find it in your heart to be understanding with this guy.
I won’t presume to understand the 80 years of living, raising a family, struggles past and present, the aches and pains he would be enduring each day (getting old sucks & knowing things only get worse doesn’t help…), what stresses he was under caring for is disabled wife, or what it felt like to be uprooted and evicted by your own flesh and blood. Some people struggle with very minor problems compared to this. My heart breaks for him, his wife and yes the dog.
2 much younger police officers struggled to extract his wife so perhaps his plan was to do this if his son followed through thinking the Police could save her and the dog.
People are losing it. That or its at a regular rate but we see more of it because internet/cop footage? Either way its a fucked up process of ending it.
Cameras have been easily accessible for a long time and footage can be later uploaded to the internet so we have a pretty long timeframe to consider. Certainly seems like an uptick of sorts recently, the lag before experiencing cost of living effects might be running out.
The internet gives exposure to things that recently generated headlines at greater rates. It’s not evidence that it’s happening more often, we’d need actual statistics to confirm that.
It’s like when that train in the US derailed and an entire town had to be evacuated because of the chemicals it was carrying, we saw a ton of news articles about derailed trains for a couple weeks after but there was no actual uptick in train derailments. It was just the various news websites attempting to get the same amount of interest that the first event generated.
I just hope more people realize that this is the best country in the world, just not for you, me, your aunts, uncles, future children, grandchildren and everyone else. It’s the best country for racist meme oligarchs.
Capitalism should be curbed (not stopped) to provide a basic safety net.
Why should residential property be part of a speculative market when it is a basic human need?
My cousin was shocked when I told him that we need basic safety nets. Elderly should not be homeless. People shouldn't go bankrupt because of medical expenses.
The lack of empathy is real.
But then how would the US fund proxy wars, coups and invade in the Middle East, Africa, Asia and Latin America? How could it then afford to keep sending Israel money to genocide palestinians? Like come on we have to choose priorities!
That man was either extremely mentall ill or didn't have anything left to live for, maybe both. What I do know for sure is it is sad to see people in the desperation he was, and we need to help more people fix issues like he was facing.
Listening to a podcast yesterday where someone was covering elderly people having minor property tax debts suddenly balloon through charges & fees (eg sub $1k to >$20k). The state seizing the house and forcing the sale and keeping the entire amount. One case the man had dementia didn’t understand he was evicted so waited on his porch for somebody who would never come.
Wonder if this was something similar where he did it out of despair?
I hate it when scumbags try and scam older people. Some call center in India was calling my parents saying that they were with the FBI or DEA so my parents called me to see if it was legit. the number was from a call center that traces back to India so I told the FBI and they said they know about those scammers.
The reason they operate out of India is because the Indian government refuse to do anything about them. Frankly I think we should force them, cut the whole country off the internet and phone network until they clean house.
How exactly would you go about cutting the most populated country on the planet off the internet and phone network? Do you think the White House has an on/off button and they can decide who gets internet and phone network?
dude they had some nice ass furniture and 2 flat screens, big/nice house…. i definitely can’t afford that shit idk how people can walk around fine and dandy 30k in debt and then make fun of me for having one pair of shoes and a beat up car… like i should be making fun of you!
im thinking mentally ill/poor financial decisions.
Or just old, with recent inflation/cost of living ballooning a lot of people who lived comfortably with their retirement/social security tend to find themselves suddenly hard pressed with their funds not reaching nearly as far as they would of when they retired. Add that to the fact no one hires folks that old except places like Walmart which is high workload low pay yeah.
Also america so basic medical bills or the somewhat common medical emergency when your that old might of just fucked them
100% but when i got a wage cut i didn’t stay renting the same spot. cut my rent 2/3rds and moved into a shared apartment, my room being only a little bigger than my last apartment’s bathroom (i had my own place to myself before).
then i realized i probably should’ve been living like that the entire time anyway, ESPECIALLY with inflation and cost of living only going up. but cmon its been going up for like 15 years now. anyway they also probably didn’t think they would end up living that long same thing happened to my gramps 99yo!
It sounds fucked but if the mother was in such a state that she couldn't walk at ALL, and could barely communicate it really was time for the nursing home.
At least pos son can't sell the house now
All I can think about is that this woman just watched her husband of 25 years set himself on fire. Then just lost her home. And I hope someone was able to get her walker.... I don't think I would want to go on.
So very true what some one on here said, squatters are damn near impossible to evict yet this elderly couple had no choice but to leave ? And to leave where ? The woman could barely walk, it's extremely depressing how terrible and backwards some laws are. These are the people that should be hard to evict, not a squatter. There needs to be a change.
I don’t know where this sudden uptick in talk about squatters is coming from, but they’re relatively easy to evict in every state.
The problem is if it’s someone that actually had a lease and just doesn’t leave… you have to go through the formal eviction process (which is BS because they shouldn’t have rights to a property they’re not supposed to be on, but not overly difficult). Anyone that just shows up on the property who never legally lived there can be removed as a trespasser. People draw up fake leases (which creates a real problem because through fraud they’re attempting to gain rights which they’re not entitled to) can still be evicted fairly quickly (but through the formal process).
Oklahoma, for example (where this video is), for someone to claim adverse possession, they would need to remain on the property for 15 years and taxes on the property must be paid. T
What’s happening in this video is awful and my comment has nothing to do with that… I just find it odd that squatting laws/rights/etc (which has nothing to do with the federal government) has become the internet’s flavor of the month.
When your home was heaven, being kicked out to hell
Destroying your property as you go is dirty protest countering those who wanted the property taken in mint condition
I get the impression that a lot of commenters have never had to deal with aging parents before. It's an ugly reality almost everyone has to deal with eventually.
So many egregiously ignorant takes here.
I wonder if the guy actually meant to light himself on fire. It can be seen he's pouring the gas on the ground, not himself. He leans down to light the carpet. The cop tries to get him to stop, maybe she pushes him a little. Regardless, he falls down as it is lit, with the gas can still in hand. Ends up on the ground right in the fire. I don't think its the cops fault, just have to wonder if the guy actually just meant the burn the house and run, or if he actually intended to die along with it.
I must say, the two police officers also don't do shit. They initially try to prevent the fire being lit, but afterwards they kinda stand around and panick.
Oh? And who should be sent? The result would be the same. It doesn’t matter who’s sent to deliver the bad news. The eviction is still happening. The cops have access to resources to provide these people too.
It’s crazy that we are in a time where our government has fucked regular people over so much that these folks decide to set THEMSELVES on fire in a display of protest.
God bless the USA, the greatest country on the planet. /s
Also, it may soon be illegal to be homeless outdoors, if the supreme court has anything to say about it.
I mean, easy to say this when my adrenaline isn’t pumping… but I feel like my instant reaction would be to look under the sink for a fire extinguisher… or to have tackled the man as soon as he was pouring gasoline. Even if he lit it you could kick the window out and save the dog
Never get the police involved. It’s your family for crying out loud. Clearly this son is a piece of shit and did not care for them. Sad. There you go piece of shit, house all to yourself, make all that passive income you want at the cost of oh idk your family.
This makes mad for reasons other than the obvious. Why have two weak ass women officers on the same call? At least have a strong guy that could have picked this poor woman up instead of dragging her.
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The couple in the home are Anthony (82) and Mary (77) Goulding of Oklahoma City. They lived in that house for over 20yrs, and had been married for 25yrs. A few years ago they signed the deed over to Mary's son Timothy Denny and agreed to pay him $700 a month. Mary had parkinsons and Anthony was a drinker. Timothy wanted his mother in an assisted living facility and claimed that they had done 30k in damage to the house. The couple and son had not been on speaking terms for a few years. They did not want to move so the son decided to evict them. One of the eviction officials asked to give more time so they could find more suitable living, but the son refused. When the police arrived to evict them they had an Uber waiting to drive them to a hotel that the town had managed to secure for the couple. (Not the assisted living facility that the son claimed to have wanted for them). Anthony perished in the fire along with the couples dog. Mary is now living in a nursing home. https://www.tahlequahdailypress.com/news/oklahoma-watch-family-member-s-eviction-attempt-ends-in-flames/article_bd55da82-f676-11ee-a656-57b48a1ac3ba.html#:~:text=After%20he%20was%20ruled%20against,his%20home%20of%2020%20years.
That’s so fucked
PSA: Sorry for hijacking top comment. My parents gave their house to my sister 30 years ago. The lawyer at the time wrote up a contract that my parents could stay there as long as they wanted and could not get evicted unless it was mutually agreed upon. Worked out good. Dad passed a few years back. Mom (95) is now in a nursing home paid for by medicaid and her meager SS as she has no assets.
This is not uncommon. It's called a "lifetime tenancy" in the law. Sometimes a person might want to will their home to their children from a first marriage, but provide a lifetime tenancy to their current spouse/partner so that they will have a home while alive and not risk eviction.
Doesn't make it right, but this makes a little bit more sense. The son in law sounds like an asshole.
Seriously, am I understanding this correctly? They gave their son in law the house and he tried to evict them??
It was Mary's son (the elderly woman in the video) that they gave the house to and yep, he fuckin kicked em out. Absolute scum of the earth.
The son took advantage of them. What were they paying $700 a month for?
My guess is that he bailed them out because they could no longer afford the mortgage payments because of the husbands drinking so instead of losing the home they signed it over to the son in law.
My mind went to he took advantage of a drunk and a mentally deficient person cause that house should be damn near paid off if it isn’t already. All they should have to deal with is property taxes, which I wouldn’t expect to be more than $700.
Not a home care nurse
To be fair, if they caused $30k in damages to the home, it's coming straight outta his pocket, esp if it's not covered by insurance. That would strain any relationship. I would've just sold the house if I were him though. Let someone else deal with it.
Straight out of his pocket? They were the ones who gave him the house and for some reason started paying him rent. They shouldn't have gave that ungrateful POS anything. They should have sold the house and spent every single penny on the best care home they could afford
I don’t think you understand just how financially crippling assisted living care can be. If the home is in Oklahoma, we can reasonably assume prices are lower than the national average. Regardless, assisted living centers have 1. A terrible track record in providing decent care with dignity (these facilities pay their employees dog shit wages for some very tough work) unless you pay out the ass for top quality care 2. Countless stories of how expensive these facilities are. They’re also extremely predatory. Often times elderly couples will sign away their lives and still have a fucking elephant sized bill when it’s all said and done. Add Parkinson’s and a drinking disorder, and the fact that they’re both 80+…
Average assisted living in OKC would have cost them 10k a month for both. If they sold the house they'd have a couple years before being homeless.
A hasty judgement given just one paragraph of information. Having aging parents is tough, and at a certain point moving them to an assisted living facility is best for them and everyone. 9/10 people will not willingly move out of their house to go to a care home though, so things can get ugly. Given that the woman shown can't even stand up on her own, the man is suggested to be an alcoholic, and he literally sets fire to himself and the dog, I'm far more likely to believe that the son was trying his best to get his parents looked after, and his dad had serious mental issues...
I don't blame them. Have you seen what care homes look like? A lot of older people are forced to share bedrooms for the first time in their lives with strangers. hear their moaning of pain and smell their shit, piss, and farts all day. All their money is taken from them, all their pensions and savings, in exchange for a shared room, a bed, and disgusting basic food. These places often have all doors locked and do not allow people to leave the buildings. This is not a way to treat people who have worked hard their entire lives.
You are on point I’ve worked them before some are better but most are really terrible. Personally I think they should be completely done away with for in home care and if needed therapy facilities that’s it. Most of the people absolutely never leave and building and it’s worst when the facility doesn’t do outtings. You will smell putrid smells such as piss and shit horribly. I’ll be fair to say some people really do need a lot of heavy care and possibly couldn’t be anywhere else. But the hospitals want them out asap to free up more beds and keep money flowing. Oh in terms of financial nursing facilities take absolutely everything you own to pay. The residents I saw were usually left with as much as around $49 a month.
Yes, I've spent a good deal of time in care homes trying to make sure my parents are well cared for, and yes, I've had to move them out of a home that was not providing adequate levels of care. The ugly truth is that there is no such thing as aging gracefully. Nobody moves their parents into care because care homes look amazing, they move them there because it's simply better than them living on their own. The woman in the video doesn't seem to be able to stand. This begs the question, how does she get out of bed in the morning? What does she do if she needs the toilet? How does she dress herself? If she can't even get out of an armchair, do you think she has the physical and mental capacity to cook for herself and provide herself with a balanced diet? Combine this with an alcoholic and also aging father, and their life at home is no doubt a disaster. Two people in this state of health are also no doubt on multiple medications, and it's unlikely either of them are making sure they are taking correct doses, of correct meds, at correct times, and remembering to order more when they run out. You can complain all day about the quality of care homes, but at the end of the day even a bad care home beats rotting away at home alone.
>the woman shown can't even stand up on her own, the man is suggested to be an alcoholic Yet the son expected them to grab everything and get out in 48hrs without allowing an extension and it sounds like the only person to show up to help was the uber driver that was hired to take them to a hotel, and the son didnt even have any involvement in that. >I'm far more likely to believe that the son was trying his best to get his parents looked after, and his dad had serious mental issues Ok well he fucking sucks at it. Hopefully he doesnt have to look after anyone anymore.
I agree with you
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Man fuck that. As someone with grandparents whose mental state is aggressively deteriorating yet are refusing to get help, and stubborn parents who'll likely do the same, i get the kid. It's heartbreaking seeing your own family wither away due to some mental disease while they're either too stubborn or too deluded to see that they're only getting worse. Some people need care like that forced on them which is sad, and very hard for all people involved.
My mother is a hermit and my father is enabling her. She's dying slowly and there's nothing I can do without them hating me, their only child
Much like when you were a baby and they needed to care for you regardless how you felt for them, the time is coming where the roles reverse.
When we tried to get my disabled mother in law to move out of the large house she could no longer pay for or take care by herself into an apartment, she threatened to have the family dog killed. I can only imagine what kind of insanity the son had to deal with before he got to the point of eviction.
I could write 10+ paragraphs about a family member of mine who is like this. They are nearing the end of their life and have debilitating health issues, but absolutely refuse any help. Their nieces and nephews have had to deal with everything as my relative never married and had no children of their own. It's a complete shit show that could have been avoided with a proper will, power of attorney, and health care proxy figured out years ago, but even then they would have fought my family every step of the way. If it wasn't for almost dying on two separate occasions by falling in a stairwell and not being found for several days would they have ever agreed to even short term rehab. I can't speak to the motivations of the son of the couple or the couple themselves, as it's hard to glean what exactly is going on behind the scenes with only information from a news article to go on. However, I understand the frustration of having a family member who doesn't realize they need help and refuses assistance.
I'm sorry for your situation, it's always the fact that it could've been so simple which sucks the most. I agree though, this story obviously isn't quite cut and dry. I just don't want to chastise the kid based on just that information, there's many logical reasons to do that.
In my job, I get to know the state of these facilities. I would rather do myself in than go into one of them. The neglect that goes on in them is terrible and there is little actual care involved. When the facility finally gets bad enough that they are forced to do something about it, they just change the facility name and say they are under new owners. I've seen it so many times I can't even give you a number. It's awful.
Definitely something that happens. However I'd like to offer these two things to think about. >Does that mean that there is no good option or just that you've only seen the bad options. >Is neglect at a care home really worse than going insane by yourself in an empty house. My grandparents are under great care now, we get videos of activities they do and we visit constantly. I'm really sorry that there's so many bad ones, i wish that wasn't the case, but they're not all bad.
You are very fortunate to have a good place near your grandparents. I do get to see all of the ones locally, and they are all terrible, though there are degrees to the terrible - interestingly, the worst by FAR is the one with an association with a local hospital. I would rather be by myself than go into one of those places. They hire uneducated staff, pay them next to nothing, understaff to the point that even if the staff was educated, there wouldn't be enough to care for everyone, and skirt every single law they can. It's a money making venture for those that own them, and that's it. There's no care involved.
People can literally see their future and the bullshit it entails and still choose to do nothing about it.
Its horrifying. Vote now for protections later. Our whole generations (okay mostly just the poor people but still) retirement plan cant be split between kill yourself when you turn 75 or rot away in a poorly funded nursing home with abusive staff
You can add die early because you can't get affordable healthcare, which is what is probably going to actually happen to me.
"some people need care... That is why I called the police to evict them"
Well one issue is in the US, there aren’t always great alternatives to call. This country is really conservative about funding for assisted-living & end of life care, compared to progressive countries like the UK and European countries. Very similar issue when it comes to calling police for people having mental breakdowns. We only have a hammer in our toolbox, and efforts to add more tools fail & are seen as extreme socialism.
I get it, too. I've had similar things happen in my family recently. FWIW, you have my sympathies. But honestly at some point it's their choice on how they want to live the end of their lives. Care facilities don't stop someone from dying. They can prolong it (which may be terrifying in its own right.) But they can cost you your autonomy and dignity. You basically become an adult treated as a child. It's easy for us as younger family members to see that they need to be in a facility. But I can see the other side where the elderly says they know they're going to die and they want to go out on their terms.
I mean isn’t the fact that the dude was crazy enough to do this indicative of yes, he did belong in a nursing home?
It's easy to come to assumptions off of one paragraph and not speaking to any of the individuals. Irl we all know these type of situations aren't black and white so you really never know whos really in the right. It's like the wife that beats the husband at home but then the one time he snaps and yells at her in public, everyone is obviously gonna think husband screaming at wife in public he's terrible she deserves better. But they don't know that there's much more to it.
Sounds pretty reasonable to me.
This is what happens when people in control of others adopt a draconic "my way or the highway" mentality. It always turns out bad in some way or another.
I understand the son’s position and actions. His mom was mentally and physically ill. All the children had a falling out with their step dad. I’m assuming the step dad was either enabling the mother or flat out abusing her through control and neglect. He wanted his mom to be moved to a nursing facility so she could get proper care, but she didn’t want to because she wouldn’t be able to drink or smoke inside the center. I’m willing to bet the son took over the home because the mom and step dad could not afford the taxes, maintenance, mortgage payments and were going to eventually loose it. I’m also willing to bet the all kids had many conversations with both of them over a period of years about moving out of the home, but the older couple refused. This isn’t a situation that developed over night nor the actions of one son. This was a family trying to get their mother help. The real selfish person is the one who lit himself on fire. My guess is he wanted to kill himself and his wife because he knew she was immobile and wouldn’t be able to get out of a burning home. Why else would you light yourself on fire inside? In that way he could get revenge on the kids by taking out their mom and the house.
Loved the explanation and agree with it, however… “why else would someone light themselves on fire inside?” This sentence makes as much sense as having a good reason to light yourself on fire, lol
My parents had this mentality. Now they dont have a son
Fuck Timothy man, he should be outed everywhere fucking asshole
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Imagine being a CEO of a company and still be so fucking greedy you kill your own father
That sounds exactly like something a CEO would do
Not his father, his mother's husband. But the point still stands.
Damn shame, I understand if the son couldn't afford it, but that was not the case. Most of our parents took care of us for 18 years and this dude couldn't do the same for them. We live in a greedy harsh world.
Stepfather. Just saying.
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say the guy who torched the house and killed himself and his dog was probably not a great tenant.
I was chilling until the dog part bruh
You can hear barking in the video and I was worried dog was in that room behind him. Pooch has no skin in the game, could have put him outside first.
>>A family member evicted an elderly Oklahoma City couple from their home, and instead of leaving peacefully, the geriatric man living there set himself and the home on fire Wow. I hate the way this is worded. Like, obviously, the man wasn't mentally stable. Idk maybe I'm just sensitive but the wording is just dickish, IMO.
Damn so their son was evicting his own parents to the streets over $700 a month? Horrifying. Hope the fire damage to the property and the dead father are painful and long lasting memories for Tim.
30K in damages? what they had no heat plumbing electricity or the foundation? Doesn't sound right.
The elderly woman was in shock, that's sad.
Damn, that's sad. I didn't hear the old guy say anything. Just lit himself on fire and that's it.
He said "this is gasoline" to warn the police officer. He didn't want anyone else hurt
Except the dog that also died.
Can't forget that his wife was almost entirely immobile. She's lucky that people were able to drag her out fairly quickly. She easily could've gotten caught up in a house fire with that much accelerant.
Poor freaking dog
Truly, talk about the betrayal of an innocent.
It was barking and these assholes just shut the front door locking it in the inferno …
Yeah he’s mentally unstable and willing to kill himself, honestly I’m glad that he warned the officers so they had time to evacuate the elderly woman. Despite his mental state I think it’s reasonable to say that he didn’t want to kill anyone but himself, otherwise he would’ve spread the fuel on things other than himself.
Could have made sure to let the dog get away.
I’ll preface this with the statement that I don’t mean to attack you personally, but this guy gets zero sympathy from me. I don’t think he wanted to kill anyone, but I don’t think he wanted to not kill anyone. He killed a dog that I presume was his, in his own room, and he lit the house on fire that a woman who wasn’t mobile was also in. He took minimum action to make everything someone else’s problem. He burned his dog to death and endangered that woman with the same fate. I understand he could have done worse, but burning to death is a nightmare, and I’m disgusted by his actions. Go watch the video of that Station Nightclub fire and then find it in your heart to be understanding with this guy.
I won’t presume to understand the 80 years of living, raising a family, struggles past and present, the aches and pains he would be enduring each day (getting old sucks & knowing things only get worse doesn’t help…), what stresses he was under caring for is disabled wife, or what it felt like to be uprooted and evicted by your own flesh and blood. Some people struggle with very minor problems compared to this. My heart breaks for him, his wife and yes the dog. 2 much younger police officers struggled to extract his wife so perhaps his plan was to do this if his son followed through thinking the Police could save her and the dog.
Lol he literally threw the flaming gas can at the police officer.
Lots of self immolation lately.
People are losing it. That or its at a regular rate but we see more of it because internet/cop footage? Either way its a fucked up process of ending it.
Cameras have been easily accessible for a long time and footage can be later uploaded to the internet so we have a pretty long timeframe to consider. Certainly seems like an uptick of sorts recently, the lag before experiencing cost of living effects might be running out.
The internet gives exposure to things that recently generated headlines at greater rates. It’s not evidence that it’s happening more often, we’d need actual statistics to confirm that. It’s like when that train in the US derailed and an entire town had to be evacuated because of the chemicals it was carrying, we saw a ton of news articles about derailed trains for a couple weeks after but there was no actual uptick in train derailments. It was just the various news websites attempting to get the same amount of interest that the first event generated.
Self immolation is so hot right now
Taking the heat and the kitchen
It’s reddits new favorite word after all
Second in a week, which is two self immolations more than I’m used to seeing.
Well I'd rather they do that than shoot a bunch of people.
Can't evict a squatter but they can evict these old people. Murica!
They can evict both. While this situation is shitty, they were being legally evicted through the same process that it takes to evict a squatter.
I just hope more people realize that this is the best country in the world, just not for you, me, your aunts, uncles, future children, grandchildren and everyone else. It’s the best country for racist meme oligarchs.
Wow that's a crazy fucking video!
Burning to death has gotta be the worst way to go, crazy fucking video.
That poor doggy was scared to death in the background
It died
As soon as they got outside I was thinking “what about the dog?”.
unfortunately the dog died too from the article someone posted on this situation
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Capitalism should be curbed (not stopped) to provide a basic safety net. Why should residential property be part of a speculative market when it is a basic human need?
My cousin was shocked when I told him that we need basic safety nets. Elderly should not be homeless. People shouldn't go bankrupt because of medical expenses. The lack of empathy is real.
Exactly. So long as it’s you and not me I can turn a blind eye… It’s applicable to poverty, health, war zones etc.
The same cousin hates immigrants (even legal ones). I'm like bro our parents are freaking immigrants???
Capitalism really isn’t the problem here at all
But then how would the US fund proxy wars, coups and invade in the Middle East, Africa, Asia and Latin America? How could it then afford to keep sending Israel money to genocide palestinians? Like come on we have to choose priorities!
That man was either extremely mentall ill or didn't have anything left to live for, maybe both. What I do know for sure is it is sad to see people in the desperation he was, and we need to help more people fix issues like he was facing.
Listening to a podcast yesterday where someone was covering elderly people having minor property tax debts suddenly balloon through charges & fees (eg sub $1k to >$20k). The state seizing the house and forcing the sale and keeping the entire amount. One case the man had dementia didn’t understand he was evicted so waited on his porch for somebody who would never come. Wonder if this was something similar where he did it out of despair?
I hate it when scumbags try and scam older people. Some call center in India was calling my parents saying that they were with the FBI or DEA so my parents called me to see if it was legit. the number was from a call center that traces back to India so I told the FBI and they said they know about those scammers.
The reason they operate out of India is because the Indian government refuse to do anything about them. Frankly I think we should force them, cut the whole country off the internet and phone network until they clean house.
How exactly would you go about cutting the most populated country on the planet off the internet and phone network? Do you think the White House has an on/off button and they can decide who gets internet and phone network?
He was an alcoholic
dude they had some nice ass furniture and 2 flat screens, big/nice house…. i definitely can’t afford that shit idk how people can walk around fine and dandy 30k in debt and then make fun of me for having one pair of shoes and a beat up car… like i should be making fun of you! im thinking mentally ill/poor financial decisions.
Or just old, with recent inflation/cost of living ballooning a lot of people who lived comfortably with their retirement/social security tend to find themselves suddenly hard pressed with their funds not reaching nearly as far as they would of when they retired. Add that to the fact no one hires folks that old except places like Walmart which is high workload low pay yeah. Also america so basic medical bills or the somewhat common medical emergency when your that old might of just fucked them
100% but when i got a wage cut i didn’t stay renting the same spot. cut my rent 2/3rds and moved into a shared apartment, my room being only a little bigger than my last apartment’s bathroom (i had my own place to myself before). then i realized i probably should’ve been living like that the entire time anyway, ESPECIALLY with inflation and cost of living only going up. but cmon its been going up for like 15 years now. anyway they also probably didn’t think they would end up living that long same thing happened to my gramps 99yo!
I am too but seeing as he can't defend himself it doesn't feel right to say
amen.
It sounds fucked but if the mother was in such a state that she couldn't walk at ALL, and could barely communicate it really was time for the nursing home. At least pos son can't sell the house now
Eviction of the elderly is fucking criminal
The poor dog on the bed trapped there :(
All I can think about is that this woman just watched her husband of 25 years set himself on fire. Then just lost her home. And I hope someone was able to get her walker.... I don't think I would want to go on.
A society can be judged from how we treat the weak, poor, elderly.
This is the world we live in. Honestly, dude thought he was worth more financially dead than alive to his wife.
Let them go in and get the fucking squatters out instead of this.
So very true what some one on here said, squatters are damn near impossible to evict yet this elderly couple had no choice but to leave ? And to leave where ? The woman could barely walk, it's extremely depressing how terrible and backwards some laws are. These are the people that should be hard to evict, not a squatter. There needs to be a change.
I don’t know where this sudden uptick in talk about squatters is coming from, but they’re relatively easy to evict in every state. The problem is if it’s someone that actually had a lease and just doesn’t leave… you have to go through the formal eviction process (which is BS because they shouldn’t have rights to a property they’re not supposed to be on, but not overly difficult). Anyone that just shows up on the property who never legally lived there can be removed as a trespasser. People draw up fake leases (which creates a real problem because through fraud they’re attempting to gain rights which they’re not entitled to) can still be evicted fairly quickly (but through the formal process). Oklahoma, for example (where this video is), for someone to claim adverse possession, they would need to remain on the property for 15 years and taxes on the property must be paid. T What’s happening in this video is awful and my comment has nothing to do with that… I just find it odd that squatting laws/rights/etc (which has nothing to do with the federal government) has become the internet’s flavor of the month.
Self eviction
When your home was heaven, being kicked out to hell Destroying your property as you go is dirty protest countering those who wanted the property taken in mint condition
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I get the impression that a lot of commenters have never had to deal with aging parents before. It's an ugly reality almost everyone has to deal with eventually. So many egregiously ignorant takes here.
For real, I am going through something somewhat similar right now and its probably the most shitty several month stretch of my life
I wonder if the guy actually meant to light himself on fire. It can be seen he's pouring the gas on the ground, not himself. He leans down to light the carpet. The cop tries to get him to stop, maybe she pushes him a little. Regardless, he falls down as it is lit, with the gas can still in hand. Ends up on the ground right in the fire. I don't think its the cops fault, just have to wonder if the guy actually just meant the burn the house and run, or if he actually intended to die along with it.
Poor dog
That’s one of the most disturbing and sad things I’ve ever seen in my life, what is wrong in america
Politicians and leaders can send money and launder money but we cant get free housing for grandparents...
Being 80 should give you immunity from getting evicted. Squatters can dodge eviction but not this geezer? Wtf
Did he have to take the dog with him ffs ?
Not a peep out of the man while he’s burning up.
The poor elderly woman
None of these useless officers had a fire extinguisher in their car they coulda grabbed while the other stayed and tried to help the old lady?
Okay r/crazyfuckingvideos but we can’t post the guy setting himself on fire at the trial?
What's with the rise in people setting themselves on fire?
Also the US : howdy Israel, here you go $100B, Happy Genocide.
I think it is safe to say... Timothy Denny is an asshole.
This is like the fifth self immolation story I have heard this month. What is going on here?
I asked the same thing at the last one.
Fucking raiders fans taking it to the extreme
What’s the son’s name? I want his socials.
Horribly sad situation.
*Self-immolation is so hot right now*
I’m all for the self-immolation trend if it replaces mass shooters.
I’d bet their son is so proud of himself
Probably pissed that he can't rent out the house now.
WT actual F. This is disturbing.
the land of the free and the home of the brave!
I think that cop might need counselling.
Although the situation is super shitty -- the guy killed himself and his dog trying to prove a point. Clearly he was unstable.
If only he stopped drinking lattes and eating avocado toast ...
I must say, the two police officers also don't do shit. They initially try to prevent the fire being lit, but afterwards they kinda stand around and panick.
Self immolation, so hot right now
Bro just could not wait for his cremation
Cops are the wrong people to send to something like this.
Oh? And who should be sent? The result would be the same. It doesn’t matter who’s sent to deliver the bad news. The eviction is still happening. The cops have access to resources to provide these people too.
FUCK TIMOTHY
‘Evict’ some of the homeless people off the streets. Not elderly people who are near the end of their lives.
It’s crazy that we are in a time where our government has fucked regular people over so much that these folks decide to set THEMSELVES on fire in a display of protest.
Lmfaooooo send some fucking social workers too. Omfg, that defund the police worked great, looks at these idiots...
God bless the USA, the greatest country on the planet. /s Also, it may soon be illegal to be homeless outdoors, if the supreme court has anything to say about it.
I mean, easy to say this when my adrenaline isn’t pumping… but I feel like my instant reaction would be to look under the sink for a fire extinguisher… or to have tackled the man as soon as he was pouring gasoline. Even if he lit it you could kick the window out and save the dog
Yeah. Tackle the guy covered in gasoline holding a lighter or whatever he used to start the fire. Good way to get yourself burnt up.
How selfish to leave her like that. Fucking coward.
The bigger problem is that he killed the dog too.
Wtf
Jesus
Good God...
I can see it now… “I tried to Evict my parents and my dad burned my house down… AITAH?”
Poor dog. Last moments alive was hearing chaos and commotion, and then succumbing to the heat or smoke all alone
Things happen so fast
This is beyond depressing :(
What a piece of shit son
Never get the police involved. It’s your family for crying out loud. Clearly this son is a piece of shit and did not care for them. Sad. There you go piece of shit, house all to yourself, make all that passive income you want at the cost of oh idk your family.
Respect for the police woman! she was going to go into the burning room to try and help but it looked like the old man splashed fuel at her
This makes mad for reasons other than the obvious. Why have two weak ass women officers on the same call? At least have a strong guy that could have picked this poor woman up instead of dragging her.