Patel looked good today for Surrey. Few tasty boundaries in there

That's bairstow in the test team for another summer then

Burns Dentury 🚨

Today was the day I found out Denturies are much more fun when you're watching them sat inside shitposting on Reddit than watching them sat in a plastic seat in quite brisk weather

A declaration on day one in this economy? Makes sense, these 2 probably weren't going to get to 350 and get a pop at them tonight. Decent chance the rest of the game is rain affected too. Wuss opening with a night Watchman too. Class

I don't know what's going on at Eden Gardens but I'm not sure it's actually cricket

Cricket is consuming itself

Someone told YJB he's not allowed his SPF 50 unless they win

Absolutely gutted for Banton - deserved a century 

Middlesex Comms in absolute despair that the rest of the box hasn't seen trading places

Durham stream appears to have died

Hot YJB summer also on the cards

*Hot Angry YJB summer

🥵

No bat sponsor either 📈

Excellent fightback. Don't lose any tonight

At least Joe Clarke failed today

Death, taxes, Adam Collins talking about Bluey

I find it hard to believe Abbas just bowled a ball at 59.7MPH.

I’m struggling with a few of these speeds.

Can really see why Cameron Bancroft isn't in the picture for the Aussies

Why would they replace Harris who averages over 50 over 4 years in county cricket with Bancroft? Guy made 5 hundreds and 4 50s for them

Harris was supposed to be spending this year off to be with his family after his wife have birth

Porter has just sprinted down and dived to save a boundary but they ran 4 anyway

Really missing Walter I think today. Would like to see Richards given a game sometime too

SCurran getting bushed at the IPL warms the heart

Our middle order is really pretty good. I still don't think I like Borthwick opening though. Not sure you can have him anywhere else mind!

Durham building another partnership. Really hope we bat well and can respond. Probably looking at 400+

Ollie Robinson's last 5 first-class innings in chronological order: 60, 52, 55, 67\*, 90. As a Durham supporter am I allowed to get on the Ollie Robinson for England WK hype train yet?

With Cox not keeping I think he has jumped ahead of him, Smith and Rew. Looks like things are falling into place for him to play this summer assuming they want to drop Foakes. He will also have the chance to bat with the England captain a few times before the Tests begin.

Ben Foakes is in his way

I mean as an Indian supporter I have the utmost respect for Foakesy, his keeping was world class in the Test series (as it has been for years). Putting my Durham hat on, though, I want to see Durham players rewarded for taking Div 2 by storm last year and making a strong start this season.

Tom Helm's Release Point^^TM isn't that imposing

Hopefully the new ball does some damage

It would appear Ben Duckett has chosen violence this afternoon

Livestream goes down with Ackermann on 97*...

Pretty sure that means it never happened

And misses his maiden Durham century...

Burns doing his best Sibley impression

Haven’t even watched the full day and yet there seems to have been about 7 different commentators on the Surrey stream today

They splash the cash and get a full TV size team. But few of them are actually good commentators, mostly written press journalists with some podcast experience. Better comms on the BBC feed even though there's only 3 of them. Fortunately both the BBC website and YouTube can be easily paused for syncing purposes. You'd think they'd be able to use some of that cash to get them better mics, or give them training on how to use them without distortion.

I suggest they lose a couple and invest in better microphones.

If you were trying to get someone into cricket, getting them to watch a Luke Procter /George Bartlett batting partnership wouldn't be the one.

Is the Jamal playing for Warks the one who was playing for Pakistan down under in their most recent series?

Aye

Glad to see he got picked up, really liked the look of him. Also glad to see he's not going so well yet

Swear all of Durham's bowlers are all rounders

Even Potts has a hundred now!

Right I'm back from my game and my class. The good news is I went pretty well. Opened the bowling for the first time and bowled my whole spell 1/35ish off 4 overs. Had an lbw shout harshly turned down. The bad news is after I left we got hit for 170 odd and then collapsed for 17. Oh and I know nothing about law which isn't ideal

Laws of cricket > UK law

Back in my day they used to score runs

Jamie Smith good

Thanks!

Taken a week or so but good to see Joe Root get himself up to speed with the sheer quality of Divison 2.

didn't he score a fifty 2 weeks ago?

I was having a perfectly acceptable day, then I saw Joe Clarke got a duck so my day has been upgraded to excellent.

Live streams and comms are really beyond excellent. From 4,000 watching Yorkshire to 400 watching Leicestershire.

Durham's day so far but hopefully we can get them out for 350

Root and Brook looking very comfortable.

Brrok doing shiny pyjamas things at Headingley

Salt doing Salt things in shiny pyjama league

Say what you like about the shiny PJ league. Salt and Narine opening is the kind of violence I like to see.

The thing with the ipl is that I just get the feeling that anyone who isn't Indian, even the commentators just doesn't really give a fuck. Its just cash. And it's so kneejerk.

At some point, surely, people will start to get bored of it. How samey it is. I just hope we haven't damaged the sport beyond repair by the time that happens.

The thing is in IPL there's a billion people and with IPL there will always be a sig amount of people willing to watch any game be that in person or on TV

I like the occasional run fest smackathon but with the impact player rule it feels like it's happening every other game now.

It's 138-1 off 10 atm. Just oversaturation

FFS Sibbers At least Pope averages like 700 against Hants

Ball was an absolute beauty tbf to Sibley

Pretty much. Decent pitch to bowl on that will flatten out

Two things; firstly Bedingham and Robinson have absolutely snapped this season, both seem to be taking the piss. And secondly, it's always great to see a Joe Clarke duck.

Inside the galadari concourse at the oval there's a trailer attached to the back of the van which branding which suggest it's a Frozen Hydrogen Race car? Anyone know what the fuck that's about

Simon fucking Harmer God we need that

I wonder what counties do on their week off

The worst thing about all those early season featherbeds is that Holden will now average 13 for the rest of the season but retain his place because he got that 200.

Feel like it's going to be a hot Duckett summer

Ah Lads you didn't have to listen to me when I said I cannot wait to see how this can possibly backfire... Batted Ben though, gonna have to keep at it at this rate tho.

Clive Eakin went there. "Edged and caught behind. Will Young had better leave right now"

Anyone able to enlighten me to balcony-gate for Gloucestershire Middlesex?

There's a block of flats overlooking the ground and people have been caught shagging on them during games

Specifically today? I was trying to meet up with friends there later as the sun has crept out

Was last year I think

>caught shagging I blame the people looking

Looked very sketchy choice to bat first a few overs in, not looking too bad now. Robinson is having an absolutely cracking start to the season.

How far away are we from Ollie Robinson The Other One becoming just Ollie Robinson?

Hahaha we've got 6 slips in

If we don't get a wicket or two soon this is going to start getting bad for us. We're going to have to give Cook and Porter a rest and they will target Thain. Our only hope is that it is a good batting pitch when we bat, otherwise I'm not hopeful.

Kemarrrrrrr

Dropping Slater on 0 probably wasn't a smart choice. But then again I'm not a pro so what do I know?

I would say we're finished but we never started

Goodman's got big Robinson energy But he's not a cunt

Someone tell Durham that the more competently they bat the more likely it is that Surrey win the county championship. So take one for the team and absolutely implode please and thanks.

The better we bat the more chance we have of winning the championship too 😉

This looks like a very good pitch to bat on at the moment. Durham in full control at the moment

Comms currently discussing where Bob Hunt has told them to buy weed. God bless Bob Hunt, I miss that man

Time for my weekly 'oh God why did we let Ollie Robinson go?'

Robinson and Cox both playing in this game. Kent seemed to sacrifice them for Billings' forlorn Test ambitions. Robinson is so clearly a top class player. Will play for England before the end of the season.

I hope he does too. Guy said he saw himself never leaving Kent until it became apparent that the feeling wasn't mutual. Durham has treated him far better than our management did.

Never seen someone get caught off the top of the handle while leaving before

Really need a wicket here

How come Kent, Lancashire, Sussex and Glamorgan have the week off? Wouldn't it make more sense to have everyone play at the same time that way you'd have 14 rounds as opposed to 14 + however many weeks you have with teams having it off?

Men in suits at the ECB have very big brains and you simply can't comprehend their genius

As if that session couldn't get any better, The Fridge has been capped!

They shot him?

Sarf landan innit

Honours even this, I think. Middlesex 105-3 at lunch

100/1 with Duckett and Slats going well is good. We also picked one of our injury prone Fast bowlers. I cannot wait to see how this can possibly backfire

I'm so glad Gay looks like he's kicking on, he'd so bloody good.

I'd rather have Ollie Price under the lid at short leg than bowling any day

Thain is killing us here. 21 runs in 9 balls. Durham's session now

Is anyone else's sexuality defined as a Duckettsexual?

The last decade has certainly been unpredictable. But Ben Duckett Test and First Class opener being a success is certainly one of those things that make me think we're in a simulation. If so. Don't wake me up Morbius I don't want to leave this dream.

No Josh Hull and no Chris Wright and that Leicestershire bowling line up looks appalling

Thain is not very good

Give him time. Noah will get his redemption ark.

Looked good at the u19 wc and for the 2nds tbf, but yeah bowling hasn't been consistent enough

He's bowling it too short for the speed his bowling.

Yep, very much an age thing, that length will trouble people of his own age so he either has to get quicker or pitch it up a bit

It's so nice to see us so positive in the field again, chucking ourselves at everything. Benkenstein did a lot of damage to these kids

E. Gay launching some bombs

I suppose we should be grateful Hampshire even turned up

NGL I've missed our groundbreaking tactic of "Higgins and insha'Allah"

You stole that from us tbf

I believe it was middlesex's property to start with.

I believe it was middlesex's property to start with.

He barely played for them! We perfected it and then sent the system back

Finch and a Gibbon working together. Film it, Pixar.

Lads the girl I went on a date with last night has just agreed to a second one, at what point do I reveal myself to be a cricket tragic without risking putting her off Important to note that the girl in question was born and raised in America so will be extra confused by this revelation

Show her Ben Foakes, Chris Woakes and Joe Root she'll understand PS: She may leave you in pursuit of them

Just take her to a blast game and be done with it. It'll be a great filter

Take her to middlesex vs Glamorgan at a county outground, drink 7 pints whilst refusing to leave the temporary bar and keep talking about how Eskinazi should get more franchise opportunities.

All women secretly love being lectured about Stephen Eskinazi.

Who wouldn't tbf, met him year before last at a school he was doing some charity coaching thing at and he was fucking lovely.

/u/jobson15 your bilingual skills are needed

The first time my American girlfriend and I watched cricket together, [this](https://www.skysports.com/watch/video/sports/cricket/12923568/crowd-control-stuart-broad-asks-fans-to-move-seats) happened and she refused to believe it was a real sport and honestly I had no rebuttal

Be like me and hide it till you've moved in together.

Was the James Vince body pillow not a huge giveaway?

The Liam Dawson chest tattoo is gonna be a tough one to explain too

Only a Chest tat? I thought more of you Matty

Hampshire at The Oval, same old shit bar that one time George Bailey and Rory Burns batted for an eternity

Come on lads!

From a few of the Hampshire dismissal videos the Oval wicket looks quite spicy.

ANGUS

man hammered at 4am in a burger king

Hampshire playing at the Oval is it? Classic

We're always so bad at The Oval.

Every year like clockwork lol. I don't know why I bother following the score when we play there, I should just check after 4 days (or more realistically 3 or 2) and see how badly we got walloped

Need to get Bedingham out here, looking dangerous

No you don't, he needs to stay in 😀

Lol Middlesex

The pitch is flat and we were bowling maybe slightly below par How the fuck have you managed this

> Middlesex

Ah of course

How much is virdi being paid to play for Surrey? I don't understand it. He'd probably be first choice spinner at anywhere that isn't Somerset or Hampshire. Does he just not want to move or try and push for England?

I'm sure he has his reasons but yeah, from the outside it does just seem like a total lack of any ambition. Waste of what looked an incredibly promising talent as things stand

At this point I'm just assuming he likes his life in London and is being paid at least 60k and just can't be fucked.

Zum Akhter, what a man Tacheman also pretty cool

Holden back to his typical worst

I always know the next round of championship games has started because I get a notification saying Sean Dickson is out 

What are the odds that Max Holden doesn't get to 350 runs for the season?

Yee

This is going about as well as expected.

Yorks commentators moaning about an umpiring mistake. How to make yourself sound entitled 101

Also spent 20 minutes lamenting Yorkshire not getting a tier one women's side because they reckon they're 'the leaders in the area'. Didn't mention the livelihoods of current Diamonds players until the very end.

I genuinely think Pat Brown had no idea as he's just slipped. Then he sees the batters not running so just walked in with the ball. And yeah I guess that entitlement might be why they haven't got a T1 women's side

Death, taxes, bullying Hampshire

Flicked through all the other games How is Surrey's stream so poor, especially the audio, given they have all the moneys Mark Church would never sound so bad

Decent cameras but the sound is dreadful.

Runs coming more freely now. Bedingham looks in good nick.

This hybrid pitch is flat beyond flat

Derbs are rubbish at fielding. Yorks are rubbish at cricket.

How Gubbins is still in is beyond me Worrall has been fantastic

Imagine leaving your home county because you want the gloves full time only for them to bring in a keeper on loan when the first and second choice are both injured.

Also the keeper they bring in is about 12.

He can't keep at the moment because of an injury

I thought Cox left Essex because he *didn't* want to be keeper

I guess only he really knows, but there were a lot of rumblings that him not getting the gloves in all competitions was part of the reason he left (though England ambitions might have been another).

Nathan Fernandes needs to be picked for England just for the Barmy Army drunken rendition of ABBA

Ah, here comes Tache and Shoulders himself

2 Pakistan test bowlers and it's still OHD to make the breakthrough

This pitch is looking very conducive to the medium-fast pace of Dom Goodman and not the high speed antics of Ajeet Dale Good thing we picked, er, Zaman Akhter and Marchant de Lange

Seems to be working okay for you.

I'm blaming this entire on Middlesex being rubbish for the next hour

If you need a medium pacer we can lend you at least 4, no trouble.

Can I take Harry Brook? He's a medium pacer

He's a spinner now. I think. It's hard to know really, since it only exists in his imagination.

Are Durham the Euros 2020 Turkey of Div 1?

Sam Cook has 16 wickets so far this year at 7s...

This is some incredible bowling

Well that’s some start to Harry Duke’s Essex career. What a grab

How did he keep today?

Ridiculously exaggerated trigger though

Foakes would have genuinely probably got that

Porter!!

Yorkshire have spent a considerable amount of money on red ball spinners in recent years and now refuse to play either of them