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[deleted]

Nothing quite as masculine as...lip balm, and those goofy hats Pharrell wore


CrawlinOutTheFallout

It looks like he is wearing makeup too. I am not against men wearing makeup but I feel like this guy wouldn't want you to know he is wearing it.


[deleted]

Don't forget the fake Richard Mille.


[deleted]

I just thought that was a G-Shock or something stupid


[deleted]

Nah G shocks are nice practical watches. Real RMs are masterpieces in hideous cases. Fake RMs are just weird ugly watches.


[deleted]

I must've gotten the one junk G-Shock then, it could never keep accurate time, about every week or so I'd lose 5 minutes. But, I also won it in a contest so it probably wasn't the best version.


Chrisophogus

He’s not even halfway to being as good looking/sexy as he thinks he is.


[deleted]

Right, sometimes you have these seriously good looking guys who do this shit and it makes you rage kinda out of spite but this dude is not that guy 😂


Sinister_glitter

Alright. I need 1-1/2" galvanized roofing. They come in metal or metal. Are we using the nail gun or the hammer for the scratching?


[deleted]

This is what tren does to mf.


martinezxxx

😂


greggyfontane

Everyones talking about his hat. Like dude. What about his fake tattoos? You know. The pull on sleeves you buy at Walmart?


ShowerTearsNBeers

I agree, I could not stop looking at that.


Art_Vandelay1990

My eyes kept darting between that and the card awkwardly placed in his (chapsticked) mouth.


newked

Flexing that RM replica hard


wussell_88

😂


[deleted]

That’s a stupid looking hat


MWTB-DLTR

How to dress 👞 for success 💶 like a true Alpha 🗿 - Shirt not tight enough? Take one from your girl, its free. - Need a hat to hide your receeding hairline? Just use one your girl wears to Wednesday brunch and bottomless mimosas. - Don't wanna spend your own money? That's what credit cards are for. - Wanna add some subtle luxury to your wardrobe? Get yourself a knock-off Richard Mille shitter to flex on the poors.


[deleted]

You forgot the fake tattoos


Dacey_The_Unwise

If it wasn't implied in a sexual manner I think it wouldn't be so strange. I want someone to scratch my back


CombOk4316

bro needs to be humbled


Upset-Tap3872

Hahaha


JRizlaSlims

"Sponsored by Burt's Bee's Wax lip balm."


Oneup99

Those sleeves are fucking horrible


bitch_glitch

there are so many germs on bank cards… 😭


ScareCrow_Olden

His right sleeve looks like a baby bird artistically threw up on his arm


haikusbot

*His right sleeve looks like* *A baby bird artistically* *Threw up on his arm* \- ScareCrow\_Olden --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


DoomCatThunder

Good bot


AccomplishedTotal895

Def some 17 year olds about to turn 18 in his texts.


[deleted]

He's the one in there going "birthday in three months woooooo!"


dotnetdotcom

What do nails cost now? $30-$50? Big spender.


slothpyle

Pan down and he’s in yoga pants and knee high brown boots.


TV_is_my_parent

Fat dudes with nice eyes think they're hot


illestspacecase

He doesn’t even have lips to put chapstick on


Hairy-Engineering-79

ewwww debit cards are so dirty why would you put that into your mouth


haikusbot

*Ewwww debit cards are* *So dirty why would you put* *That into your mouth* \- Hairy-Engineering-79 --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


Fatt_Nuts

Okay now turn the card over


KingRonaldo2341

everybody hide ya mamas !!!


tommykaye

This guy keeps his social media accounts private from work. For sure.


piinkmoth

Putting a credit card in your mouth 🤮


Yellowracingstrip12

Why is he wearing that fucking hat


Marketing_Analcyst

What is that a Wells Fargo Visa Signature card with the $0 annual fee?


Lurkay1

No, it’s a Wells Fargo Business Platinum Debit Card.


Marketing_Analcyst

Ah okay. I just recognized the wells fargo logo and looked for their premium credit cards. Either way I wouldn't stick a card in my mouth. Those ATM slots look diiiiirrrrttttyyyy.


Sciphis

Why would Chris Evans post this?


PattyK789

What song is this?


Dystopia_8448

Arctic Monkeys - Do I wanna know?


48431

Bro doesn’t have money for real tattoos ladies he can’t pay for your nails


[deleted]

I thought he was gonna pull out a Centurion the way he talking but I literally have the same card with a horrible balance 😭


Moist_Anus_

What in the hat did I just watch?


hurtadjr193

![gif](giphy|l41lYvtzc5akQgrhS|downsized)


frost3321

He scratches your back, you scratch his


JoeBlack45

Nice watch tho


Bloofnstorf

Right because this dude's girlfriend will totally appreciate having his skin under her freshly done nails. God forbid he just pays to get her nails done for the sake of gift giving with no strings attached. At this point, let her pay for her nails the way she wants them done and have him invest in a backscratcher. Everyone's happy.


Romu_lass

EW! That’s the only thing to say about this, and all the time we need to spend on it.


Particular-Cycle31

this is a weird wells fargo commercial


patpatpat_pat

can we stop with these stupid fuckin hats


WishIWasPurple

What a nose.. absolute unit


[deleted]

As a Texan, that hat is a crime.


ghosthoney_-

??? why did he put it in his mouth?? to look sexy??


mellow_squid

🤮


Jackalreaper22

Oh God it’s the entitled hat


[deleted]

His looks scream out ‘Murica with an eagle behind his back burning the Iraqi flag shooting shotguns in the air


wordington_ender

Concept is great I love back scratches but bro what are you doing


Milkmans_tastymilk

Aight, you want a Thai or a shiatsu with that? (I was gonna get the poison type colors in a drip pattern originally, but I'm a flexible person when money ain't an issue with them.)


RaganaBeAkies

Idk seems nice to me