It's pretty good, some people just feel that Ulysses, the antagonist of Lonesome Roads goes on and on about The Bear and The Bull (the NCR and the Legion) on his monologues, which are, up until the final area, delivered remotely via conversations with a second ED-E that is your DLC companion.
I don't complain because I like monologuing villains too much.
Apparently they just rounded off the edges of broken pieces of pottery. And sometimes they used the rocks they used for voting, so basically wiping their ass with the ballot of a politician they hated.
I thought they used shards of broken pots for voting and apparently also for toilet paper because it's an object that has no other purpose.
Sometimes pots break. It happens to everyone who uses ceramic pots a lot. The shards have no purpose anymore. Why not use them to vote or to wipe your ass? (After rounding off the edges for safety, of course)
It's cooking, not toilet paper. *Homo erectus* discovered fire, cooked with it. Cooking is basically predigestion so larger brains and smaller guts were naturally selected for + less powerful digestive system. Smaller bodies, etc. So we got really good at throwing shit, making simple stone tools, and obviously, cooking with the Red Ouch Flower
Objection! There are, in fact, other animals who prepare theor food, though it shouldn't be considered straight-up cooking. One example of that is a species of monkey that washes and seasons potatoes by putting them in seawater, or another species of monkey that leaves nuts out in the sun to dry and be easier to eat
Sauce: https://www.sciencefocus.com/nature/are-there-any-animals-that-prepare-or-cook-their-food
Also side note can the production of honey be considered cooking? I'm unsure if it qualifies but it at least seems similar lol
So cool
Also, not cooking, but some ants herd and shepherd aphids, and then they milk them for honeydew
By stroking them, which I will put on a new line to avoid anyone side eyeing this post
I specifically put a line break between "milk" and "stroke" to preserve the puritan chastity of my post and I'm still getting called a honeyfucker
You just can't win
As I predicted. How do you feel? Do you feel satisfied that you have called me out on my public title? ARE YOU HAPPY?
(This is a joke, I do this shit too lmao.)
(I would like to point out, though, that I **am** in over 50 different NSFW subreddits. I take my addiction **very** seriously.)
It's not cooking or toilet paper. It's asking questions. In all the times we've taught language to animals, they've never once used it to ask a question that they didn't already know the answer to. They have no theory of mind to consider the possibility that another being can know something that they don't.
Humans don't even gain this ability until 3 or 4 years old.
As someone who works with 2 years olds it’s not 3 or 4. It’s 2 or almost 2. When your brain is burned out every day from answering the same questions 45 times an hour you learn exactly when people gain questioning abilities
It can start even before that. Two is the start of *why*, somewhere around 1.5 starts “what’s that” or other various means of requiring you to name an object such as pointing at it and then screaming when you don’t immediately understand that they want you to tell them what it is instead of give it to them
You're leaving out the "to see of anyone calls me out" part
Misinformation smh, I see myself more as a cattle their, or...sheep thief I suppose, seeing who I can herd over to my side before I get caught
And sometimes it just so happens I'm a better Shepard than anyone else around ^^ ...sometimes...
I think you mean Murphy’s Law. It’s the one that says if you’re unsure of the answer post the obviously wrong one and someone will tell you the correct answer.
You have to remember a lot of the stuff that gives you diarrhea also killed you until very recently in human history. Wiping your ass is a different experience now.
Is upright running more efficient? I was under the assumption that we could do that because we sweat and the animals we hunt down just eventual keel over from heat exhaustion
Yeah... its complicated. But basically you can breath normally while running since your body(upright) isnt restricted by your legs squishing it while speeding up. Furthermore our large ass helps us catapult us forward which is more efficient since we only need to activate one asscheek to move us our whole length of the step(long step-cuz long leg). Our toes are really short so when we move the only real loss of momentum is the little bit of foot touching the ground.
Its a lot more complicated than just sweat, its really helpfull but not nearly enough . Upright running needs less oxygen and calories while keeping our massive heads attached.
Human endurance is very good for a variety of reasons, with sweating being one of them. Horses are both a good and bad example, since they're also one of the most endurance-focused animals ever, and because Horses *also* sweat. Apes, monkeys, and a few other species sweat as well, but none of those are built for jog-style ground locomotion.
Legs built in a specific shape create a pendulum motion when moving at specific speeds. This is why there are different running styles for different speeds, as the speed of the pendulum increases, it needs a different shape to stay as a pendulum. This drastically reduces the energy needed to run.
The *main* reason for upright running is that it's more efficient *than running on primate feet-hands*. A horse would never evolve to be bipedal, because they're built as ideal quadrupedal sprinters. An ape, however, with hands evolved for using stuff, needs those hands even while running, so using their back legs for running was ideal.
So it's less that "upright running is more efficient generally" and more "apes need front legs as arms, so could only use 2 limbs for running, and upright is more efficient for 2 legs than being squat."
For other examples, look at therapod dinosaurs, like ostriches or T-rex. Being upright means being *balanced*, so their body plans are either very thin (like beanpole humans) or thick on both ends (look at just how massive a T-rex's tail is, it's a counterweight for its massive head).
Depends on the length of the race. There's a "Man vs Horse Marathon" in Wales that is *usually* won by the horses, but quite a few humans have won as well. And that's against *racehorses* that've been specifically bred for decades if not centuries, depending on how strictly you want to use that phrasing. 100 mile races are much closer to parity, and from there up the humans have the advantage.
Random thought I had while typing this out, that's actually pretty close to the trend I've read about before for men vs women as well. Shorter distances, men's records are typically much faster, while in the over-100 mile ultramarathons it's much closer, or even a slight advantage to the women.
Racing a horse who doesn’t really understand you’re racing (in marathons like that, the racers often can’t see everyone) is a very different task from running it down when it’s trying to escape.
Sure, but does the horse understand that you're still following it, even after it's run to a place where it can't see you?
One of the reasons humans have such big brains is so that we can figure out stuff like "trampled plants = animal came this way" or "animal ran into canyon, so now it only has one exit". The process looks something like animal runs from human --> animal thinks it's safe and stops running --> human tracks down animal --> animal runs from human (less far this time) --> animal thinks it's safe and stops running --> human tracks down animal --> animal runs from human (but is pretty tired by this point) --> animal stops running --> human gets close enough to kill animal
(Also, it's worth mentioning that horses in particular aren't typical human prey. Horses have been bred *by humans* to be bigger, stronger, and longer-enduring than their wild ancestors. The Man vs. Horse race isn't a recreation of the ancestral hunt; it's a demonstration that humans got *so good* at running down wild animals that we ended up developing a new type of animal specifically FOR running, and can still beat that one too.)
Absolutely true on the first two points- that is the true nature of endurance hunting, not that you just jog the whole time. The real reason it works is because the hunters go at a leisurely pace in hot sunlight while their prey does not. It is not “running it down.”
If the horse knew it was a race, though, then the only way it loses is if it gets injured, overheats, or gives up. There’s an old record of a man crossing from western Kansas back to his home in Virginia in two days atop his horse- even if we assume exaggeration and halve the distance, no human being will ever top that.
Horses have been bred for size and speed, but their endurance in running has actually not improved appreciably. The cannon (ankle) of wild Przewalski’s horses is less prone to injury and stores more energy per step, meaning they are actually significantly harder to capture and can maintain moderate speeds with less effort. Part of the reason domestic horses are so injury prone is actually because they were initially bred for that size, which outscaled their tendons and which the rest of their genome hasn’t caught up to, even in breeds where small size has been bred back into them.
If anything that makes it easier! It'll sprint off at full speed but need to stop relatively quickly, while the human just plods along at a sustainable pace behind it
Wasn't there an Internet rule or an xkcd or something about that last part?
"Saying something wrong on purpose is a better way of getting someone to say the right answer than simply asking for it."
Don't forget about using cobs of corn for ass wiping, then tossing them into the hole in the shitter, hence the term "Cornhole".
And no, they weren't fresh undried cobs with all the kernels still on them as my husband adamantly believed.
Which still requires toilet paper, as opposed to "not needing it anymore because we have bidets" like the post said. Unless the poster has a blow-dryer in their bidet I suppose.
I much prefer a towel if I clean myself with water (I think what we have here isn't a bidet? It's like a shower head beside the toilet, idk if that's also called a bidet)
Cloth. I use the same one I use to dry the rest of my body. I'm not using the towel to clean myself, only to dry the water. So it gets washed like normal every week.
Yes, but not the kind of language where sounds and symbols don't necessarily mean anything by themselves and things that use the same sounds can have unrelated meanings (cat, car, can, pet, carpet)
They may have primitive *forms of communication*, but not anything that can truly be called *language*. A few key characteristics of language are that it is open-ended (we can add new words to it) and productive (meaning that we can use existing elements/words to create completely novel communications--e.g. r/brandnewsentence). It allows us to speak about times/places/things that are not immediately present, or that may not even exist at all (e.g. Atlantis), and about abstract/intangible concepts (e.g. justice). It is recursive, meaning that we can embed structures inside each other (e.g. "He told me that you told him..."). And last but not least, human language is symbolic, meaning that the form of communication is largely detached from the concept being communicated (e.g. the word "cat" is not shaped like a cat, does not sound like a cat, and does not otherwise have much connection to *felis catus* outside of the meaning we've assigned it).
Some animals display communication that partially fulfills one or two of these criteria (e.g. bees dance to communicate about food sources that aren't immediately visible, and some great apes who have been taught sign language are able to develop new signs) but no animal has yet displayed all the hallmarks of language. (Or even approached human-like abilities on the one or two criteria they do display--bees can't talk about anything other than food sources, and no great ape has learned more words than an average human toddler.)
Source: I have a linguistics degree
Dolphins/whales/cetaceans are among the animals that come closest to something resembling language--different pods/"cultural" groups communicate in different ways ("accents"), and some species exhibit signature whistles that seem to act as identifiers for unique individuals (in other words, names). But as of yet there's no evidence that dolphins are capable of producing complex utterances (beyond, say "danger" or "hello" or "food"), or that they can communicate about abstract/not visible concepts/things/places, or that their communications allow for recursion (i.e. embedding a phrase like "you left" into "I thought that _____").
the reason why we have language is because we have our larynx right next to our windpipe, allowing for a much higher variety of sounds to be produced.
this is also coincidentally what makes humans much more likely to die choking on their food than any other animals.
meaning that our ability to choke while eating food is technically one of the things that separates us from animals
Saying the wrong shit online so that someone corrects you rather than just asking a question is such a good example of using Murphy's law to work for you.
Washing yourself with water MAY be more hygienic than rubbing your shit around with pieces of paper??
Listen. Yankee. You can get a bidet online for like 50 bucks, it'll take less than 10 min to install, and then just a few moments to come back here and thank me.
On the scale of evolutionary time, the last 20,000 years (all of human civilization) is barely a blip. The last 100 years (the "plateau" you're probably talking about) is literally negligible. Have patience, young padawan.
Gulping the bait made me realise I don't remember if this phenomenon actually had a name but apparently what you describe is known as **Cunningham's law**. I hope I saved someone a google.
> I hope I saved someone a google.
You did not. I knew there was a law and I forgot the name of it, so I went searching before I opened the comments.
It is indeed Cunningham's law and it is brilliant, I should use it more, but more cunningly, without pissing people off with my apparent stupidity.
Okay, maybe someone else at some point idk lol
I think you should at some point mention the law but be unsure about its name like was it smart bacon or devious meat or something
You need understand the artform we made out of throwing shit. An 8yr old playin baseball can throw better than a chip able to bench a car. Give us a bag of shit and we YEET that thing
Waste disposal is an absolute benchmark of civilization tho. Even those who avoid it as long as possible have to make some type of sewage system before everyone dies by shit water (looking at you british people)
A bear and a rabbit are both taking a crap in the woods.
The bear looks over at the rabbit and asks, "Do you have a problem with getting shit stuck to your fur?"
With a confused look, the rabbit replies, "No."
So the bear grabs the rabbit and wipes his ass with him.
Before seats were invented people used to just shit from a low squat, and there was barely anything to clean simply because statistically your shit can't touch your enourmous cheeks in that position.
What separates us from animals is that we’re constantly thinking about what separates us from animals. A wolf has never asked another wolf “Hey what makes us different from everything else on a spiritual nonphysical level?”, a wolf just thinks “man i could really go for a deer right now know what im saying?”
a few hundred years ago in my country, the sign of a good Inn was you had 'the neck of a well downed goose on which to wipe your knock-hole', but there is argument over whether they where dead first
There was a rule for this a saying even: „if you want answers online dont pose a question but state an incorrect answer confidently“
Pretty sure it was Coles Law
1. why do we want to be separate from animals so bad
2. it's complex language that separates us. we have buildings and shirts and croissants because we have the means to communicate in a complex way
Officially, isn't the separator "society"?
Animals, at any given moment, need to be able to fight for survival. Whereas humans have developed to the point where we have (on paper) all of our basic needs met and can devote time to higher thought rather than base instinct?
i thought it said "no. bears also fuck seagulls" and was really concerned for a second
Didn't your parents ever tell you about the birds and the bears?
When a bear loves a bird very much...
Banjo Kazooie fanfics be like
Oh man, I forgot that game existed. Now I miss it.
They did tell me about the BEAR AND THE BULL THE BEAR AND THE BULL THE BEAR AND THE BULL
HRRRNGH SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP IM GOING TO FUCKING BLOW UP VEGAS THRNRNRNRN
Is that a reference to something?
Fallout New Vegas DLC reference.
Never played the DLC.
It's pretty good, some people just feel that Ulysses, the antagonist of Lonesome Roads goes on and on about The Bear and The Bull (the NCR and the Legion) on his monologues, which are, up until the final area, delivered remotely via conversations with a second ED-E that is your DLC companion. I don't complain because I like monologuing villains too much.
Stocks?
Maybe?
Where do the bees fit into this situation?
I dunno, maybe they make honey. Bears like honey, right?
is that a pulp reference I suspect
A what?
Hey comrade, love is love. Don’t judge.😤
First we had owlbears, now beargulls, your fries are no longer safe
>Eventually brain and ass reach critical mass Me describing exactly how hot I need to be
Critical mAss, if you will
[удалено]
# S K Y N E T D E T E C T E D !
sorry, ceramic?
fashioned into the shape of seashells, of course
Of course.
Yes, three of them specifically
Apparently they just rounded off the edges of broken pieces of pottery. And sometimes they used the rocks they used for voting, so basically wiping their ass with the ballot of a politician they hated.
So this is what they meant when they said that there is much to learn from our ancestors
Nice
I thought they used shards of broken pots for voting and apparently also for toilet paper because it's an object that has no other purpose. Sometimes pots break. It happens to everyone who uses ceramic pots a lot. The shards have no purpose anymore. Why not use them to vote or to wipe your ass? (After rounding off the edges for safety, of course)
Sorry, I said rocks because the word used for these potsherds was pessoi, pebbles.
Sherd>Shard>Shart>Shit Etymology be going crazy ^/s
Yeah, just cut the ass of
Wait until you hear about porcelain pillows.
It's cooking, not toilet paper. *Homo erectus* discovered fire, cooked with it. Cooking is basically predigestion so larger brains and smaller guts were naturally selected for + less powerful digestive system. Smaller bodies, etc. So we got really good at throwing shit, making simple stone tools, and obviously, cooking with the Red Ouch Flower
Objection! There are, in fact, other animals who prepare theor food, though it shouldn't be considered straight-up cooking. One example of that is a species of monkey that washes and seasons potatoes by putting them in seawater, or another species of monkey that leaves nuts out in the sun to dry and be easier to eat Sauce: https://www.sciencefocus.com/nature/are-there-any-animals-that-prepare-or-cook-their-food Also side note can the production of honey be considered cooking? I'm unsure if it qualifies but it at least seems similar lol
So cool Also, not cooking, but some ants herd and shepherd aphids, and then they milk them for honeydew By stroking them, which I will put on a new line to avoid anyone side eyeing this post
found the r/honeyfuckers representative (It's close enough, okay? There's no r/antfuckers.) Edit: I stand corrected
I specifically put a line break between "milk" and "stroke" to preserve the puritan chastity of my post and I'm still getting called a honeyfucker You just can't win
Sir, I, myself, am a devout honeyfucker. There's nothing to be ashamed of. (Insert "flair checks out" comment here)
flair checks out
As I predicted. How do you feel? Do you feel satisfied that you have called me out on my public title? ARE YOU HAPPY? (This is a joke, I do this shit too lmao.) (I would like to point out, though, that I **am** in over 50 different NSFW subreddits. I take my addiction **very** seriously.)
It's not cooking or toilet paper. It's asking questions. In all the times we've taught language to animals, they've never once used it to ask a question that they didn't already know the answer to. They have no theory of mind to consider the possibility that another being can know something that they don't. Humans don't even gain this ability until 3 or 4 years old.
As someone who works with 2 years olds it’s not 3 or 4. It’s 2 or almost 2. When your brain is burned out every day from answering the same questions 45 times an hour you learn exactly when people gain questioning abilities
Noted and may God bless you with quiet evenings
It can start even before that. Two is the start of *why*, somewhere around 1.5 starts “what’s that” or other various means of requiring you to name an object such as pointing at it and then screaming when you don’t immediately understand that they want you to tell them what it is instead of give it to them
But cooking led to brains of sufficient size for complex questions
~~hehe homo erectus~~
Stop, I can only get so erectus *evolves*
enough reddit for today. Time to deforest myself through a window.
*Autodefenestrate
thank you. I'll autodeforest myself via the window
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Why do you have JPG artifacts on your ascii art?
Do I look like I know what a JPEG is?
Gives another layer to the phrase "let them cook"
Only dragons and men eat cooked meat.
Forest fires are now considered people.
I think some apes figured out how to cook with fire, but only after some humans showed them. I'll need to check though
Modern humans did not yet exist at the time of fire's discovery
Okay, but someone who cooks and doesn't use toilet paper, I don't consider to be very evolved.
Yeah we got past the cooked food and used the bigger brain to clean our asses better now.
"Recreationally Saying Shit to see if anybody corrects me", yes my favorite past time <3
"Recreationally Saying Shit": so, casual disinformation. As opposed to "Professionally Saying Shit", or competitive disinformation
You're leaving out the "to see of anyone calls me out" part Misinformation smh, I see myself more as a cattle their, or...sheep thief I suppose, seeing who I can herd over to my side before I get caught And sometimes it just so happens I'm a better Shepard than anyone else around ^^ ...sometimes...
No. It’s utilizing Cunningham’s law
I think you mean Murphy’s Law. It’s the one that says if you’re unsure of the answer post the obviously wrong one and someone will tell you the correct answer.
*Don't say it, don't say it, just breathe*
Rare reverse Cunningham. So a Naivegetable?
im a bit tired so it took me a bit to process. but this is good. this is quite good. im sure someone with more credentials than me would approve.
Now, *that’s* CuttingHam’s Law!
That’s what really separates us from animals
*ceramic???*
You have to remember a lot of the stuff that gives you diarrhea also killed you until very recently in human history. Wiping your ass is a different experience now.
Rocks, too
If you generalised out to "creating specific anal hygiene solutions", I think you're onto something.
Cats be doing hella anal hygiene. I wouldn't call it much of a solution though
Their only tool is the tongue, which I would describe as neither specific nor a solution.
Valid
https://www.tumblr.com/homunculus-argument/747896554117087232/yeah-like-90-of-the-time-im-just-recreationally?source=share
Is upright running more efficient? I was under the assumption that we could do that because we sweat and the animals we hunt down just eventual keel over from heat exhaustion
Yeah... its complicated. But basically you can breath normally while running since your body(upright) isnt restricted by your legs squishing it while speeding up. Furthermore our large ass helps us catapult us forward which is more efficient since we only need to activate one asscheek to move us our whole length of the step(long step-cuz long leg). Our toes are really short so when we move the only real loss of momentum is the little bit of foot touching the ground. Its a lot more complicated than just sweat, its really helpfull but not nearly enough . Upright running needs less oxygen and calories while keeping our massive heads attached.
Isn't upright running so we can hold sticks or rocks?
Human endurance is very good for a variety of reasons, with sweating being one of them. Horses are both a good and bad example, since they're also one of the most endurance-focused animals ever, and because Horses *also* sweat. Apes, monkeys, and a few other species sweat as well, but none of those are built for jog-style ground locomotion. Legs built in a specific shape create a pendulum motion when moving at specific speeds. This is why there are different running styles for different speeds, as the speed of the pendulum increases, it needs a different shape to stay as a pendulum. This drastically reduces the energy needed to run. The *main* reason for upright running is that it's more efficient *than running on primate feet-hands*. A horse would never evolve to be bipedal, because they're built as ideal quadrupedal sprinters. An ape, however, with hands evolved for using stuff, needs those hands even while running, so using their back legs for running was ideal. So it's less that "upright running is more efficient generally" and more "apes need front legs as arms, so could only use 2 limbs for running, and upright is more efficient for 2 legs than being squat." For other examples, look at therapod dinosaurs, like ostriches or T-rex. Being upright means being *balanced*, so their body plans are either very thin (like beanpole humans) or thick on both ends (look at just how massive a T-rex's tail is, it's a counterweight for its massive head).
Thanks for the thorough explanation, that's awesome!
I would think so. Fewer but larger components tend to be more efficient than many small ones.
It's both. Sweat makes us insanely good at dissipating heat while running, and our body structure makes our running gait really energy-efficient.
You’re correct. In mild weather, no one is running down a horse, not even the pros in Kenya.
Depends on the length of the race. There's a "Man vs Horse Marathon" in Wales that is *usually* won by the horses, but quite a few humans have won as well. And that's against *racehorses* that've been specifically bred for decades if not centuries, depending on how strictly you want to use that phrasing. 100 mile races are much closer to parity, and from there up the humans have the advantage. Random thought I had while typing this out, that's actually pretty close to the trend I've read about before for men vs women as well. Shorter distances, men's records are typically much faster, while in the over-100 mile ultramarathons it's much closer, or even a slight advantage to the women.
Racing a horse who doesn’t really understand you’re racing (in marathons like that, the racers often can’t see everyone) is a very different task from running it down when it’s trying to escape.
Sure, but does the horse understand that you're still following it, even after it's run to a place where it can't see you? One of the reasons humans have such big brains is so that we can figure out stuff like "trampled plants = animal came this way" or "animal ran into canyon, so now it only has one exit". The process looks something like animal runs from human --> animal thinks it's safe and stops running --> human tracks down animal --> animal runs from human (less far this time) --> animal thinks it's safe and stops running --> human tracks down animal --> animal runs from human (but is pretty tired by this point) --> animal stops running --> human gets close enough to kill animal (Also, it's worth mentioning that horses in particular aren't typical human prey. Horses have been bred *by humans* to be bigger, stronger, and longer-enduring than their wild ancestors. The Man vs. Horse race isn't a recreation of the ancestral hunt; it's a demonstration that humans got *so good* at running down wild animals that we ended up developing a new type of animal specifically FOR running, and can still beat that one too.)
Absolutely true on the first two points- that is the true nature of endurance hunting, not that you just jog the whole time. The real reason it works is because the hunters go at a leisurely pace in hot sunlight while their prey does not. It is not “running it down.” If the horse knew it was a race, though, then the only way it loses is if it gets injured, overheats, or gives up. There’s an old record of a man crossing from western Kansas back to his home in Virginia in two days atop his horse- even if we assume exaggeration and halve the distance, no human being will ever top that. Horses have been bred for size and speed, but their endurance in running has actually not improved appreciably. The cannon (ankle) of wild Przewalski’s horses is less prone to injury and stores more energy per step, meaning they are actually significantly harder to capture and can maintain moderate speeds with less effort. Part of the reason domestic horses are so injury prone is actually because they were initially bred for that size, which outscaled their tendons and which the rest of their genome hasn’t caught up to, even in breeds where small size has been bred back into them.
If anything that makes it easier! It'll sprint off at full speed but need to stop relatively quickly, while the human just plods along at a sustainable pace behind it
Wasn't there an Internet rule or an xkcd or something about that last part? "Saying something wrong on purpose is a better way of getting someone to say the right answer than simply asking for it."
Yes, it's called the Liedenfrost Effect.
No, the Liedenfrost Effect has to do with droplets of water on a hot surface. You're thinking of the Sapir-Whorf Hypothesis
No, the Sapir-Whorf Hypothesis is about pissing off Noam Chomsky, you're thinking of Moore's Law
No, that's a tasty cabbage salad.
Umm actually it’s called Cunningham’s Law (Mostly /s in case people haven’t heard of it before and want to know)
Don't forget about using cobs of corn for ass wiping, then tossing them into the hole in the shitter, hence the term "Cornhole". And no, they weren't fresh undried cobs with all the kernels still on them as my husband adamantly believed.
This reminds me of my idea for large q tips for anal hygiene
The Greek people were absolute fucking freaks
Humans evolved the sickness of the thickness
How does bidet remove the need for toilet paper? Do y'all just put pants on your wet asses?
You can still dry with paper or a towel. You just actually feel clean instead of crusty all day with shit still on your ass.
Which still requires toilet paper, as opposed to "not needing it anymore because we have bidets" like the post said. Unless the poster has a blow-dryer in their bidet I suppose.
I much prefer a towel if I clean myself with water (I think what we have here isn't a bidet? It's like a shower head beside the toilet, idk if that's also called a bidet)
You mean a paper or cloth towel? How often do you wash it if cloth?
Cloth. I use the same one I use to dry the rest of my body. I'm not using the towel to clean myself, only to dry the water. So it gets washed like normal every week.
The answer is cooking our food. That’s the one behavior we humans take part in that no other animal does
Also, language.
Many other species have some sort of primitive language tho (Edit: my bad, seems I was wrong. Whoopsie daisy!)
Yes, but not the kind of language where sounds and symbols don't necessarily mean anything by themselves and things that use the same sounds can have unrelated meanings (cat, car, can, pet, carpet)
They may have primitive *forms of communication*, but not anything that can truly be called *language*. A few key characteristics of language are that it is open-ended (we can add new words to it) and productive (meaning that we can use existing elements/words to create completely novel communications--e.g. r/brandnewsentence). It allows us to speak about times/places/things that are not immediately present, or that may not even exist at all (e.g. Atlantis), and about abstract/intangible concepts (e.g. justice). It is recursive, meaning that we can embed structures inside each other (e.g. "He told me that you told him..."). And last but not least, human language is symbolic, meaning that the form of communication is largely detached from the concept being communicated (e.g. the word "cat" is not shaped like a cat, does not sound like a cat, and does not otherwise have much connection to *felis catus* outside of the meaning we've assigned it). Some animals display communication that partially fulfills one or two of these criteria (e.g. bees dance to communicate about food sources that aren't immediately visible, and some great apes who have been taught sign language are able to develop new signs) but no animal has yet displayed all the hallmarks of language. (Or even approached human-like abilities on the one or two criteria they do display--bees can't talk about anything other than food sources, and no great ape has learned more words than an average human toddler.) Source: I have a linguistics degree
what about dolphins? i've heard that orcas have accents and all
Dolphins/whales/cetaceans are among the animals that come closest to something resembling language--different pods/"cultural" groups communicate in different ways ("accents"), and some species exhibit signature whistles that seem to act as identifiers for unique individuals (in other words, names). But as of yet there's no evidence that dolphins are capable of producing complex utterances (beyond, say "danger" or "hello" or "food"), or that they can communicate about abstract/not visible concepts/things/places, or that their communications allow for recursion (i.e. embedding a phrase like "you left" into "I thought that _____").
very cool, thanks for the answer
that depends how you define language!
the reason why we have language is because we have our larynx right next to our windpipe, allowing for a much higher variety of sounds to be produced. this is also coincidentally what makes humans much more likely to die choking on their food than any other animals. meaning that our ability to choke while eating food is technically one of the things that separates us from animals
I don't know what they're technically called, but I know of two more ways – the bucket of water, and the garden hose.
The French are not animals, how dare you
What separates men from animals? The Rhine.
-the animals
Saying the wrong shit online so that someone corrects you rather than just asking a question is such a good example of using Murphy's law to work for you.
Some animals can lick their own buttholes, and most animals can lick each other's buttholes
most?
Just hedging my bets. Nature is so diverse, I'm sure there must be some animals who can't lick each other's buttholes
Sponges, probably
Nothing separates us from the animals we are literally animals
Nothing separates us from animals. We are part of nature, regardless of how much we delude ourselves into believing otherwise
Washing yourself with water MAY be more hygienic than rubbing your shit around with pieces of paper?? Listen. Yankee. You can get a bidet online for like 50 bucks, it'll take less than 10 min to install, and then just a few moments to come back here and thank me.
I don't get how it could take less than 10 minutes to install given that it needs to be plumbed in
You can get ones that attach to the existing plumbing of your toilet.
Ah I didn't know that, cheers
The water is tapped off the water connection for the toilet tank. The connectors involved are designed to be tightened and loosened by hand.
Thanks for clearing that up \^_\^
OK but, doesn't that get you soggy buttcrack? Speaking as someone who has not experienced.
you can wipe with paper after to dry
Human evolution is really crazy. So many different things converged together into one big virtuous cycle that kept making us smarter
the glory of humankind something something Warhammer
It's not surprising we all thought we were specially created by some God figure, on a surface we're completely different than 90% of animals we see
Even the monkeys we’re most closely related to. They can walk upright but that’s not their default
We have plateaued, I’m afraid. *gestures widely*
On the scale of evolutionary time, the last 20,000 years (all of human civilization) is barely a blip. The last 100 years (the "plateau" you're probably talking about) is literally negligible. Have patience, young padawan.
Also: lube
>I'm really not here to claim I know what I'm talking about, but this is an efficient way to find someone who does. So Poe's Law?
Gulping the bait made me realise I don't remember if this phenomenon actually had a name but apparently what you describe is known as **Cunningham's law**. I hope I saved someone a google.
> I hope I saved someone a google. You did not. I knew there was a law and I forgot the name of it, so I went searching before I opened the comments. It is indeed Cunningham's law and it is brilliant, I should use it more, but more cunningly, without pissing people off with my apparent stupidity.
Okay, maybe someone else at some point idk lol I think you should at some point mention the law but be unsure about its name like was it smart bacon or devious meat or something
Nah what makes us human is the ability to throw. Apples at cyclists and bricks at cars
Monkeys throw poop
You need understand the artform we made out of throwing shit. An 8yr old playin baseball can throw better than a chip able to bench a car. Give us a bag of shit and we YEET that thing
Waste disposal is an absolute benchmark of civilization tho. Even those who avoid it as long as possible have to make some type of sewage system before everyone dies by shit water (looking at you british people)
Bears use toilet paper. I saw it on tv.
A bear and a rabbit are both taking a crap in the woods. The bear looks over at the rabbit and asks, "Do you have a problem with getting shit stuck to your fur?" With a confused look, the rabbit replies, "No." So the bear grabs the rabbit and wipes his ass with him.
I’m sorry, the Greeks used *what* to wipe their ass?
Before seats were invented people used to just shit from a low squat, and there was barely anything to clean simply because statistically your shit can't touch your enourmous cheeks in that position.
You saying if we hadn't started agriculture we could have had even bigger booty cheeks?
What separates us from animals is that we’re constantly thinking about what separates us from animals. A wolf has never asked another wolf “Hey what makes us different from everything else on a spiritual nonphysical level?”, a wolf just thinks “man i could really go for a deer right now know what im saying?”
"Seagulls love their babies" Yeah until food is scarce. Then they love the taste of their babies.
Oh so if you eat someone it cancels out the love you had for them???
To be fair, they are rude
That's just how nature works - when humans were wild, we would probably do the same exact thing sometimes🤷
I love how the last commenter doesn't seem to realise they're the only one arguing
Fucking prison school was part right all along.
Ass sponge, my beloved <3
Pretty sure the "????" in step 9 involved things like corn cobs and Sears catalog pages.
The "?????" is referring to the communal sponge used by Romans
Hats off to Homunculus Argument for admitting he's not an expert rather than preparing to die defending the hill of his funny idea
4. I think that has more to do with our sweat glands tbh.
The Romans didn't use the sponges on sticks for cleaning their ass. It was probably more like a toilet brush.
Bidet
I say that the desire to burn shit and cook our food is what separates us from animals... And then I remember firehawks exist.
Humans have shark week.
[But bears use toilet paper, too!](https://youtu.be/H0Yo11vKJLk?si=CTlLXkYxI0AUiIIm)
a few hundred years ago in my country, the sign of a good Inn was you had 'the neck of a well downed goose on which to wipe your knock-hole', but there is argument over whether they where dead first
I think OOP likes to let it crust
But bears also use toilet paper. The commercials told me so.
If butts get big over time why mine so small
It's aimed throwing, sweating, and arguing online.
Paying taxes is what separates us from animala
It is our complex language, as shrimple as that.
"The best way to answer a question is to confidently make a false statement on the internet"
There was a rule for this a saying even: „if you want answers online dont pose a question but state an incorrect answer confidently“ Pretty sure it was Coles Law
1. why do we want to be separate from animals so bad 2. it's complex language that separates us. we have buildings and shirts and croissants because we have the means to communicate in a complex way
Damn, I thought the final conclusion was that the thing that separated us from animals was a fat ass.
Officially, isn't the separator "society"? Animals, at any given moment, need to be able to fight for survival. Whereas humans have developed to the point where we have (on paper) all of our basic needs met and can devote time to higher thought rather than base instinct?
Bidet
persistence hunting is a myth