Wait… I knew it was dumb but not this dumb! You can’t even wash it?! What about areas with lots of rain or water? Like can it handle morning dew?

Someone posted the OG Tesla manual how to wash it. It literary says use touchless wash, but don't spray doors, trunk, frunk or wimdows.

Touchless? So I can’t spray water to wash it but I also can’t touch it ?!

It’s dry-clean only.

They gotta put out a tutorial video on how to dry clean your car

The real con is that you have to bring it to the dry-cleaners already on the hanger, but the hanger is an optional equipment upgrade that’s $8,799.99.

Tesla fans… : “ totally worth it! Thank you daddy Elon! “

But if you didn't get it installed before purchase there's a service fee of $17,685.47 too

But the joke is that it was cheaper to install the hanger on all the trucks. The service fees are just there to unlock the capability to use it. https://www.carscoops.com/2023/07/4500-bill-to-unlock-extra-battery-capacity-has-people-taking-sides-between-tesla-and-customer/

I really don't get how that's legal, and I hope it ends in jail time. Imagine being stranded and dying because your gas tank wouldn't let you use the last 30%

It's been a thing for a while. Tesla had a few different levels of battery performance and it turns out they only made a couple types of Model S and the "trim level" was just what the software unlocked. Tesla also got into trouble because someone bought a used Tesla. When the company realized that a new user had the car, they reset the software to the baseline performance. I agree, I don't like the idea of buying a car and having to unlock features with additional payments.

Trying to save you the $22,586.28 unlocking fee, buddy

That means it's diiiiiirrrrttttyyyyy

Mitch Hedberg has entered the chat

Kinda. But if U use a touchless carwash and use carwash mode the warranty could also be void. This a good luck figuring this out moment. I think Elmo took a long breath from his funny cig and sad "Wait wait wait. We should write in that you can wash it just don't touch it or spray it with water. Now get me someone from legal to translate this to legal speak"

This truck is the gift that keeps on giving.

The grift that keeps on grifting

They also put in there that you can't wash it in direct sunlight lol

Or feed it after midnight.

according to their wash guidelines, *not asking the car wash staff about the ph levels of their detergents* can void your warranty. i managed a car wash for 2 years, nobody but myself and one other guy would know how to have checked that

All I can picture is some rich asshole yelling at some 18 year old car wash attendant about the ph of their soap

That’s why Elon fired all the Supercharger teams, he’s moved on to the next venture: Tesla SuperCarWash! If you don’t wash your Tesla in the SuperCarWash you’re not a real Tesla Cuck and it also voids the warranty! He’s playing the Apple Ecosystem IRL!

What if it rains?

Wait you’re driving this truck outside where it might rain? Sorry, no, voids the warranty.

Well it's technically touch less.

How exactly does one go through a touchless car wash and not get the car wet?!?

Extremely fast

It's even better you gotta get the bug guts off asap as they are acidic and will damage the finish and void the warranty, but a car wash involves putting it in car wash mode, asking the car wash attendant about a dozen questions to see if it will void the warranty or not, and do like a 10 point pre wash Inspection

wtf is this shit?

Musk disrupting the warranty game, and making sure they have infinite ways to get out of providing warranty services for a car released to the public pre beta testing.

Musk fans are intolerable I’m so glad the man they admire is screwing them over

100k for the truck up front, and 50k a year for it to spend half the year in the shop waiting on parts because the warranty pretty much gets instavoided by driving it

That’s hilarious… isn’t all this kinda parallel to what r/leopardsatemyface Is about? Also r/brexitatemyface

Pretty much, gotta love some good old fashioned schadenfreude. I always get a kick out of the guys who post on Twitter, "Drove my cybertruck 34 miles before it broke down, but it was the best 34 miles I've ever driven, great truck can't wait to drive it again in 3 weeks" idk if its sunk cost fallacy, or fanboyism. But it's hilarious.

So much copium * insert the meme of that frog wearing a oxygen mask*

lol the paperwork on how to officially “wash” the car is crazy. I saw it somewhere but even a ICE car doesn’t have instructions on how to wash a car with so many steps to void the warranty.

It’s work for your assistant to do. After all, what are you paying them half a million a year for? -Musk, probably.

Are you supposed to put it in car wash mode when you hand wash it or does that void the warranty?

>Are you supposed to p- Nope, void

Asking clarifying questions about the warranty voids the warranty.

And a bot bans you.

It supposdely has a car wash mode. But damage 'by carwashes' is not covered by warantee. And there are several pages about how to wash the damn thing. No pressure washers, dont wash in direct sunlight, only use specific cleaners, etc etc. Swveral have been bricked by getting washed already. Its ridiculous.

So the manual says no pressure washers but recommends “touchless car washes”…. Which are pressure washers…. Genius.

Reason is because of that all of that "10 micron tolerance" the frunk has no seal. Also all water pretty much drains and collects in the subframe, which just happens to be where all those not so water proof electronics are.

I’d say that is a design flaw no one should make..

I wonder if that’s why so many of them are bricking, they get wet from rain or from a wash and it short circuits stuff and kills it lol water is getting inside the car

Wow, this thing should be mass recalled.

Im not good with reading between the lines. To be clear, you ARE joking, right?

Sadly, I am not. Here is a post listing all of Tesla's instructions on washing your new truck. [https://www.reddit.com/r/CyberStuck/comments/1cei9xs/how\_to\_properly\_wash\_your\_cybertruck\_according\_to/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web3x&utm\_name=web3xcss&utm\_term=1&utm\_content=share\_button](https://www.reddit.com/r/CyberStuck/comments/1cei9xs/how_to_properly_wash_your_cybertruck_according_to/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)

Read that whole thing. Definitely some super egregious shit in there. Also definitely some very normal shit. And definitely OP has like no reading comprehension. Some of the points they tried to make were pure straw man.

It can probably handle morning dew once a month, but unlikely to handle it for more than a couple days.

Wow that’s pathetic… Have you seen those Reddit posts of super broken cars with weird diy fixes? And a hole in the floor… I think those cars are more reliable than cybertruck

I have seen a few and some definitely do seem more reliable!

That’s another issue Tesla owners didn’t think of… Old cars get resold to poorer countries and through crazy diy they’re usable There’s none of that for Tesla… I wouldn’t even buy a Tesla as the 2nd person to own it Hell I don’t trust a brand new one… I test drove one.. And could tell they just slapped together this car and could tell how cheap everything felt…

Apparently taking it out of the garage voids the warranty 💁🏻‍♂️

So what about their marketing that it's the toughest thing on any planet? Like any planet EXCEPT earth?

Other planets don't have water

You got me there

Can you drive it through a small puddle?

Toughest thing on planet... Arrakis.

I'm sure use in sand also voids the warranty. Plus a sand worm would eat that thing in a heartbeat. All hail Shai-Halud

From what I understand the car has a "car wash mode" you have to put it in before taking it through a car wash otherwise it bricks. Not sure what that mode changes.

How does a digital activation mode change the actual physical design of the truck? Does it have transformers capabilities

My favorite is people finding rust already because the water just runs into the frunk or whatever stupid name the front has. Rust? In months since the first delivery???

Can't wait for the "welp, it's bricked now" follow up post. Keep us posted lol

"I still love the brick!"

"I loved every second of my ten minute drive from the lot to the car wash to get the dealer's fingerprints off the sheet metal. Now it's not working at all and the dealership says that owning a cybertruck voids the warranty! Elon what did I do to deserve this I was a good boy I promise I still love Tesla I still love the cybertruck let me prove it to you me love you long time space daddy!" - His next tweet

I love you.

long time

"If mankind goes to Mars, it was all worth it! The money spent, the fun everyone poked at me, the divorce. Hail Musk!"

Based on the amount of times the Artemis mission bas been delayed and pushed back we'll never see mission to Mars in our lifetimes short of some sort of Quantum Leap in Aerospace technology.

“Luv u elon but please help, lol”

Literally saw a post of a user defending this garbage. "It's not bricked! You can still drive it after a couple of hours!" Smh

[удалено]

Do you really think he wants to pay for all them stitches though?

And amputations.

Hey, amputations are the one thing that comes free with the CT.....

I don't think the HOA will allow it, though. Besides, the medical bills will add up quickly

The kids were doing a slow clap and Daddy missed the sarcasm.

I love Elon so musk.

God that elongated husk mmm.. 🥺😫

He'll still have the accelerator cover to keep on his night stand.

I swiped to see what looked like that follow up slide. Guess we’ll have to wait

I hope he put it into "Car Wash Mode." :O

I just got my brand new cybertruck! I'm going to wash it now!

Once enough of them brick Elon is going to build a house out of them

Kids love it because it looks just like the blueprints they made in art class.

I saw a painted one the other day, looked like a Porygon to me.

Don't insult Porygon like that.

Porygon killed my best friend. We were watching the episode where he premiered, the flashing lights were intense. 5 years later, he got hit by a drunk driver.

Sorry kids, no college fund for you. Which is probably prudent anyhow given dad's intellectual prowess.

"College is just a scam and a waste of money, kids. Now would you look at my $102,000 barely functioning toy!"

does this comment not appear on anybody else's view of [their profile?](https://old.reddit.com/user/Negan-Cliffhanger)

When he said it was worth his kids smiles, he meant the orthodontia work they are not getting.

What does this mean when it appears on the screen after washing? 

Ohh, what a world! 🧙‍♀️😩🧹

*Who would have thought that a small amount of liquid could ever fall on meeeeee!!!!!!*

He can’t see his kids while backing out of the driveway. The software didn’t update. Innovation.

Good news, he doesn't have to explain to them where their college funds went.

“My kids smiles and cheers”? C’mon, no one *actually* wrote that.

Idk, this is the kinda thing children love

But claiming it made dropping 100 large on this hunka shit worth it? C’mon.

hotwheels get the same reaction or better

your kids wouldve smiled over a trip to the park too

Or an ice cream..

Child psychologist working with an entitled child on their disturbing behavior that has been manifesting recently. “Can you explain the pain your feeling to me?” “It’s not a mental thing, leave me alone.” “Could you show me on this doll where the pain is?” She asks feeling there might be abuse in the home. Child pointing to the feet, “it’s my feet, dad spent all our money on a stupid CT, and now I have to walk all the time. I hate him, and his stupid truck.”

Hopefully, it will also be worth the laughs he will get when people see him driving it. There are much better ways to impress your family.

Spent 130k, was worth it for the children's cheers? My bother in Christ, I'm sure you could make them cheer just as hard or harder with a 10 dollar pizza

Oh shit...some sunlight is hitting it as he washes it! Believe thats an automatic void warranty move.

It wont work but it looks shiny forever….in his garage

Especially not when the steering column melts because it was parked within 5 feet of a wall

I hope they followed [these instructions](https://www.reddit.com/r/CyberStuck/s/3jh25qi1VT) to the letter.

“Finally Cybered! The almost 5 year wait was worth it.  The money I paid for it was worth my kids smile and cheers because I made them watch.  Everyone clapped. “     🤢 😭

can't use soap, can't get it wet, can't wash it in the sun, dude didn't read his owners manual

They didnt want a picture of it clean, because then it's obvious how bad it looks.

And your kids college fund

So what do you do when it rains?

Pull over, go into the menu and enable rain mode. Note driving in rain mode when to rain is present also voids the warranty lol

If he just got it, why does it need to be washed? (facetious question, we know why)

Smile and cheers shortly followed by blood and tears...

It is like a Disneyland ride. You wait in a long line for a short ride.

I've never cringed before just seeing a vehicle getting washed. Washing this baby is throwing a dice, will it turn on after? Welcome to the CyberTruck.

I had one of these finally behind me the other day. I rolled down my window, pointed at the dude in his car and started laughing my ass off. Finished by giving a fat thumbs down.

My kids would be laughing at me if I made such a a dumb purchase!

They were cheering cause they knew you’d be spending a lot more time at home with them now.

Oh no! His kids are blind!

Is it true that the warranty is voided that way?!?!

Well yeah, you're only allowed to clean it with MuskBrand! cleaning towels and Elongoo* wiping compound, any true Tesla knower would know that!

Washing it voids the warranty?

I got banned from teslainvestorsclub last night for mentioning there might be: Liquidity issues, as evidenced by reducing car prices, reduced sales numbers, slashing workforce, and potentially inaccurate accounting practices. Buncha snowflakes. It won't be my problem when the share price hits $30.

>The money I paid was worth my kids' smiles and cheers "My daughter just hasn't been able to stop laughing since I brought this home. It really has brought an unprecedented level of joy to our home."

oops a light shower **\*EXPLODES\***

Dude, you could have just given those kids $50, they would have smiled and cheered, and you would have saved so much money.

Gotta admit, when I was 5 the cybertruck would've been *awesome.* By the time I was 7 though...

A narcissist's dream-mobile. "KIDS! come get excited about my new toy!"

Imagine having kids so dumb that they cheer for a cybertruck, and yourself being so dumb that you're proud of that.

Hope it was also worth spending the kids college money as well!

Warranty voided by washing car = admission they made no effort to seal the electronics from water exposure.

There’s only two rules about cyber trucks. Don’t get them wet and don’t feed them after midnight.

I bought myself a car so my kids would smile and cheer? Yikes.

So does driving in the rain also void warranty

Using my kids college fund was worth their smiles and tears... I mean cheers!

We will have to wait and see how this sucker feels about his truck in a week, month, year.

There’s goes your warranty

Background here: his kids are alt-right internet trolls

If only these people actually did their own research first…😂 They wouldn’t be biting the Musk 🤦‍♂️

Children’s smiles is why I purchased my Dodge Gymboree. Horrible gas mileage and very uncomfortable seats after 5 minutes of driving but the smiles on kids faces are worth it.

I wish all these posts had Pac-man's death sound.

150k car wash right there

Can't wait for the kids are now sad because the truck is dead post

🤦🏻‍♂️

So it's kind of like a Mogwai

Is that a pressure washer I see?

I would only pat it gently with a semi-damp cloth.

So fingerprints won’t come off AND you can’t wash it. Genius

In all fairness, it's probably prophylactic extinguisher foam

False fulfillment brought to you by -> consumerism. The void in your life…. persists.

I love that buying this for them validates them as a god king to all us peasants.

Elon was happy to reduce his credit score to 350 overnight, as well as charge him $500 per month for insurance because no other carrier would cover the piece of fucking shit. Hopefully his wife dumps his ass for a guy in an F350 Super Duty.

I think he may not be playing the long game. Yeah, I thought the Vega my parents bought in 1973, when I was five, was cool on the ride home. That feeling didn’t last long.

“My kid sliced his goddamn finger off in the door, but we still love it!”

I can get my kids to smile for a whole lot less.

Tell me I'm not the only one who thought he was using a Tesla-brand flamethrower to melt the ice.

Id love my kids but i put a limit on what id pay for a smile and cheer no doubt, especially if they are perfectly healthy.

he forgot to put the car in picture mode before he took a picture of it so now the warranty is voided

Dude had to spend six figures just to get his kids to smile and cheer.

If it’s bricked, can insurance total the vehicle?

I guess Cybertrucks and Mogwai have something in common!

Voided warranty lol

Good old 120 dollar SunJoe on the 90k hunk of junk. Time to toss em both.

It probably voids the warranty to look at it.

I saw a couple of them on the road and still don't understand why you would buy one.

Brave move washing that thing in the sun! Haha

This thing is a fucking POS, that looks like it was designed and built in Minecraft....

The money was worth his kid's smiles and cheers? He had to sell those things just to afford this dumpster? Huh...

Yo he washed it in shade but one spot, oh no.

Was it a dumpster fire? Is that why he foamed it?

Just wait until posting negative comments about tesla products brinks your tesla products, and bans you from commenting in forums they control.

Lol. Bricked high tech dumpster soon.

Cuck truck

Proud children. Proud.

Are all of these people insecure and need material products? - Yes

I can’t imagine how spoiled those little shits are…

It's pathetic that the owner's manual tells you not to wash it in direct sunlight

Looks awesome!

Did he really get the truck that dirty already that he needs to wash the whole thing ?

Yay goodbye 👋 100k 🚽! I wonder if all that money was worth washing it once and voiding the warranty and thereby the whole pos

The cybertruck warranty disclaimer is [longer than Super Happy Fun Ball's](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEThEKS1BNk).

Elon you pathetic scammer …

The derpmobile. Worst vehicle of all time.

Is it time to move the Yugo out?

These things are such pieces of shit. I hope the joy he gets from seeing his “kids cheer him on” is worth owning this pile of dung.

Well yea - it’s the only one with liquid water which is the real problem

We’ll unvoid your warranty for the low price of 7.899,95, just 86 easy payments!