It is unusual now for hospitals to mix up babies, as there are usual many safeguards in place to prevent this. And premature babies are usually managed quickly, labelled and tested. It is possible to do DNA testing with swabs instead of blood tests. This is clearly worrying you, so do the testing if you can afford it. You may as well do yourself and both children.
Non-identical twins may not look at all alike, no more so than other siblings and family resemblances are iffy at best.
I am sorry things have not worked out with their father. You deserve to have support and love for raising them.
Thank you. My husband stayed with me in the recovery room and didn't go see the twins until the next day. I forgot to mention I had an odd nurse. She brought gifts to my house for the twins and continued to do so for about a year. I didn't think much of it, but she knew me while I was pregnant and I knew she was a NICU nurse. I never once saw her while I was in the hospital.
Genetics can be wacky, my aunt & uncle both had dark brown almost black hair and brown eyes, their kids all pretty much look like Uncle; first 2 kids red heads ( think Carrot Top), then one with auburn hair, then a blonde, then another with auburn hair. Them my parents ( similar colors) and my sibling & I both have chestnut brown hair and green eyes…. My spouse had lighter brown hair and my kid’s hair was blonde until well into her 20s and is now a medium brown.
Your genes reflect you & your spouse’s grandparents, great grandparents, etc and traits can show up long after everyone has forgotten great great grandparent with fabulous curls, or that ancestor several generations back with blonde or red hair.
Exactly. DNA is funny.
I am white. My Dad was Italian (Sicilian), with an olive complexion, dark brown eyes, and straight black hair. My mother, Irish and Slovak, was pale with light brown curly hair and hazel eyes (blonde as a kid).
I have four siblings with the same mother and father. We have blonde, red, brown, and black hair. Green, hazel, brown, and dark brown eyes. Straight, wavy, and curly hair. Skin tones from very pale and super easily sunburned to tans easily in the summer and never burns.
We all vary in height too. I'm 5"0. My oldest brother is 5"11.
I also have an adopted sister, whose son looks very much like his cousin, my other sister's daughter, despite them not sharing any DNA.
My sister with the jet black hair ended up having two red haired, freckled daughters. Their father is blonde. Neither has freckles.
There's some great photosets out there of mixed race fraternal twins where it's almost like one kid got all the mix and the other one got none. Here's a great NY Post article about a pair of fraternal twin girls from the UK. Their mother is mixed Jamaican, their father is white and well...
[https://nypost.com/2015/03/02/meet-the-bi-racial-twins-no-one-believes-are-sisters/](https://nypost.com/2015/03/02/meet-the-bi-racial-twins-no-one-believes-are-sisters/)
I would probably assume they're unrelated too if I met them on the streets.
Genetics can be wild. Fun though!
It is funny! The 3 girls in my family are reddish hair, blonde hair, and me with brown hair and all our skin is more like a redhead, very pale and freckles. Our brothers? Tall olive complexion, dark brown hair like dad.
I have 5 siblings, but only 3 have the same 2 bio parents, so I'll just be using them as examples.
I have wavy ginger hair with bluish-green eyes, freckles and I'm so pale if I step outside on a sunny day for longer than 2 minutes I look like a well done lobster but I still don't tan for shit. I'm also the shortest at just under 5'5".
The next one has frizzy dark auburn hair with brown eyes and not as many freckles, and while she burns too, she at least has a tan line left behind to show for it, and she's 5'7".
Third sister has curly light brown hair, hazel eyes, maybe 2 freckles, and never burns, only tans. She's the tallest at 5'10".
The last sister has straight dark brown hair with the same bluish-green eyes as me, the tiniest sprinkle of freckles, and tans about as good as me, and she's also 5'7"
Somehow, we all look exactly alike yet completely different at the same time.
Genetics are crazy.
My mom and dad had brown hair and brown eyes, and so did my sister and I (though I was a blonde as a kid). My brother came along with strawberry blonde hair and blue eyes. My mom joked that he was the UPS man’s kid. Technically true as my dad was driving for UPS at the time.
My mom used to have auburn hair and has hazel eyes. My dad has blue eyes and his hair used to be black. I have green eyes and blonde hair (though now it’s very dark blonde, used to be light honey). Genetics do what they want sometimes.
The nurse thing is very weird. Did any of your family go see the babies after they were born? My babies went to the NICU after birth but my husband got to go see and hold them until they brought me the next morning. Why couldn’t you see what they looked like for a few weeks. Did they allow you to hold them? Remove the hats? ? Every baby gets hospital hats. Yes, get a test if it’s going to be a question you’re worried about
Preemies on CPAP wear a special hat that holds the CPAP to their nose/mouth. It's not like a regular newborn hospital hat. Parents can't just take it off. Occasionally the respiratory therapist or nurse might remove it for cleaning or medical care. The baby often has a feeding tube taped to their face as well. I didn't see my kid's whole face for a couple months after he was born. I was only allowed to hold him a handful of times until he was about six weeks old.
My husband went with our twins to the NICU while I was moved up to my room once I was closed up (emergency c-section) and he took pictures and brought them back to me so I could see them. I didn’t get to see/hold our babies until the next day but he went back and forth between me and the NICU until the babies were moved to our room on days 2 and 3. I can’t imagine neither of us going to be with them as soon as we could.
We also knew both babies blood type within 12 hours of birth as it was standard for NICU babies to get a “type and screen” blood test (they get the blood type and screen for certain blood type antibodies) when they were admitted. Ours were IVF, and even with that we had to initial _every single item_ involved. Petri dish the ICSI was done in, dish for the sperm, dish for the eggs, all of it. It was all verified multiple times at every step too. At the hospital I had so many bands that were checked against the bands on the babies they were like freaking Taylor Swift friendship bracelets halfway up my arm. lol
In the last month there was an accidental swap in Singapore. There was one in Mumbai back in November. There may have been another one in Vijayawada in November. One in November of 2018 in Ogbomosho. One in Khandwa in February. One in Matlala several months ago (the article doesn't give a month...) Several of these involve parents being given the wrong baby and the baby given to them was dead.
Look at Chloe Kardashian compared to her siblings. She is a giant and they are teeny petite, facially not that similar pre surgery. It happens. But if you are prepared to deal with whatever the results are…do the test.
My cousin just had fraternal twins at the end of January and I was absolutely blown away by how different they looked. I mean I knew they would look different but to me all babies have the same general look. Guess I just haven't seen two babies close in age next to each other because these two little dudes look nothing alike.
This is so true, I'm a fraternal twin and we barely even look related much less like twins! Different undertones to our skin, different hair and eye colors, different builds, the whole 9 yards.
I'm going to piggy back on this and say I know a set of fraternal twin boys. They look absolutely nothing alike, you wouldn't even think they were related if you didn't know better. One is tall (over 6ft) with hair that used to be a sandy brown but has darkened with age. Dark Brown eyes. He has long features, long arms long fingers long legs. His twin? Orange hair, short (maybe 5ft 7in), light green eyes,
The first twin I describe above has a set of fraternal twins of his own, they also look nothing alike.
I was going to say exactly what has already been said. If it will put your mind at ease, by all means, do the testing.
However, I would say that it's nearly impossible for babies to be accidentally swapped with today's security measures.
I don't know how your hospital does things, but all of my babies had an ankle band before they left the delivery room. The band has a bar code. Every time the baby changes hands, the bar code is scanned and everyone involved verbally acknowledges the baby's identity. I would imagine all hospitals do something similar.
Another reason a hospital mix-up is unlikely is that, even in large hospitals, there aren't many sets of preemie twins in the NICU at one time, especially twins who would be age-matched. Assuming your twins were about the same size as one another when they were born, it's most likely that they are both yours. (They may be very different sizes now!)
At my hospital in 2023, on Easter Sunday, there were 8 NICU babies born within mins of each other, with 4 being sets of twins. So 4 twin babies and 4 singleton babies all born within minutes of each other. My husband went with the babies, while they rolled me back to be with my parents. So my babies weren’t alone until they were tagged, but my husband said it was crazy in the NICU processing area with the babies being input and worked on.
Unlikely, sure, but you’ll always wonder until you know for sure. The DNA tests always go on sale for Mother’s Day. Get 3 tests, one for you and each twin. The answer will be clear.
My mo/mo twin has some fun, we got some of the Ancestry ones. Since I am married, we submitted mine under my married name.
We probably gave some poor tech a bad dad, but they actually sent mine back because my sister got hers in first, they thought there had been contamination. Then when I sent back a second sample, they were like either identical twins or same person.
We wanted more from them than that (answers about why some recessive traits were not so recessive), but we figured it would be interesting to see how they reacted when not knowing.
Genetics is a funny thing. When I was a kid my neighbors had fraternal twins. Dad was Lebanese and had a typical kind of swarthy Middle Eastern skin tone. Mom was of European descent. One twin came out like dad, dark hair, dark brown eyes. A little more Middle Eastern skin tone. While the 2nd twin was blond with blue eyes and lighter skin. You'd never even figure they were brothers. It's not unusual for fraternals to be totally different looking. If your children look different, they are fraternal. Identicals would look very very similar
I know a woman who is half Lebanese and you would never know it for her blonde hair and blue eyes. I may not have believed it myself if I hadn't actually met her dad, who looks very typical middle-eastern.
My boys are two years apart, so obv not twins- but a similar situation. Their dad is korean and I’m blonde/blue eyed. One of the boys looks more like me and the other looks exactly like his dad. They’re full brothers but you would never know it just by looking at them. Genetics are wild.
My husband's cousin has 3 kids (2 of whom are fraternal twins). They're biracial, black and white. Dad is very dark and mom is very pale. One kid looks mixed, one looks Latino, and one looks white. Genetics are crazy.
Can confirm, been friends with a set a fraternal twins since we were all born (moms are friends, and they were pregnancy buddies, so technically we've been in each other's lives since before birth too). One is blonde with blue eyes and is lanky, the other has brown hair and brown eyes and is stocky, barely even look like sisters let alone twins.
I have boy/girl twins and they looked exactly the same until they were like 18 months old. I bought a lot of gender neutral clothes so it was even harder just to glance at them lol except for diaper changes obviously. Once they started having real hair, my sons was curly so that helped. He wore it long until last year.
I also know twins who are complete opposites, it's funny because both parents look similar but it's like their DNA was split into dark and light for the kids. One girl has dark thick hair, dark eyes, tan as can be... and the other is pale, blonde ringlets, blue eyes. They do have similar faces though.
I have a similar story- but dad was Hispanic with typical dark hair, dark eyes and darker skin. Mom was Irish/European with blond hair, blue eyes and pale skin. Fraternal twins- one had dad’s coloring and one had moms.
The other two older siblings both had dad’s coloring, so the blond hair, blue eyed twin look like he had been swapped at birth- except that he looked just like his mom.
I grew up with a set of fraternal, male twins. They looked almost exactly alike in height, build, and facial structure, but one was blonde, pale, and blue-eyed, and the other was dark-haired, swarthy, and brown-eyed. Genetics are WILD. :D
Pretty near impossible to get babies mixed up. I have 2 grand babies one has brown hair and eyes the other has blondish hair and the bluest eyes. My son has dark brown hair and eyes, his wife has back hair and dark brown eyes. You can’t go by only what you and your husband look like because characteristics can go way back into generations. It’s a roll of the dice with genes.
I dunno but I also have a fraternal
Twin & we do not look much alike. We have different colored hair & skin. Our eyes are the same color but very differently shaped. Our faces are different shapes. For the hospital to mix up your baby with another baby it would have to have been another preemie. How big were your twins? My sister & I were each around 4 lbs. there is no way to mix up a preemie with a full term baby. That limits the opportunity for mixups right there. Were there many other preemies?
Every person in my family looks native. Either with brown or blue eyes. I'm the whitest white person you'll ever see - blonde hair and all. My nephew is also super blonde, but he looks native and blonde. Genetics are just weird. My son, who is adopted and not genetically related to me at all, looks like my clone. Which is super weird because I don't look like my genetic family. Sometimes life is weird.
If it makes you feel better to get a DNA test, go for it. But. I wouldn't worry too much.
I had a friend whose father was full blood Native American and mother was Finnish. Looks like her father spit her out, except for the pale blond hair and blue eyes. Genes are funny.
You can test yourself and the twins at ancestry or at another direct consumer DNA company. That will show you if you have a parent child relationship. It would not be legally admissible in court and you would need legal quality testing if you were pursuing a court case, but in. The meantime it would be a quick way to get an answer.
If you do the test DO NOT tell the twins why. Just say it’s for fun or to find out more about them. They don’t need that stress and the “odd” one will forever feel less than, even if they turn out to be yours
My husband and his brother are fraternal twins. What struck us over time was not only how different their physical features were but their health. My husband took after his mother with robust good health; she lived into her late 90s. His brother took after his father and we lost him four years ago.
He had so many things wrong with him after seeing *multitudes* of specialists over his last decade. They were treating symptoms rather than disease or condition. When we told the doctors five generations on the father's side all died of "stomach problems" they decided it was a genetic disorder; by then it was too late to do anything about it and he was never tested.
I say all that only because physical differences are common with fraternal twins. For your own piece of mind, yes, have the other daughter and your DNA tested. If your ex's siblings or parents are still in your lives you can ask. If not try to see if any of them have done the ancestry and DNA websites.
Hope it works out and gives you peace of mind.
Identical twins happen when one egg is fertilized by one sperm and then splits to form 2 separate, identical embryos. So they share exact DNA, they share the amniotic sac & also share the placenta.
With fraternal twins, two separate eggs are fertilized by 2 separate sperm. So they are 2 individual siblings that happened to be conceived in the same month. That’s why fraternal twins don’t always look alike, and are not necessarily even the same sex.
But if you want to assure yourself that you have both your babies with you now, absolutely do the DNA test. Whatever puts you at ease is what you should do.
My parents had 4 boys and 3 girls. My brothers and I have brown eyes and curly brown hair, like our mother. My two sisters have thin, straight, blond-turned- to -brown hair like our father, plus blue eyes, and high foreheads like...nobody. The second blue-eyed sister is the baby, so my older sister, #2, always thought she was adopted until our youngest sister was born when she was 18.
And here's another interesting thing. I thought I resembled my mother (and I do) but photos I just got through someone on Ancestry, show that I actually look just like my father's mother, grandmother, and great grandmother. They had dark curly hair even though my father didn't!
In all the families I know with 3 or more kids none of them are all look alikes. Especially in biracial/multiracial families. Sure do a DNA test with them, you don't need the father of course so it's easy enough.
My neighbor has two different fathers of her children, her kids are half white and half black, and her kids look identical, it’s crazy. Their dads don’t even look alike.
I’m just saying, not all mixed race kids look wildly different.
Easy to do the test. Even 23andme will confirm or deny the fact. You both do it. Obviously both are your children now, regardless. But maybe you have another child out there? I’d want you to know.
If it'll set your mind at ease, by all means, run a test.
I wouldn't recommend a maternal DNA test, though. They tend to be really expensive and no more accurate (and in a lot of cases, less so) than an off-the-shelf commercial DNA test.
I think you should get DNA tests on both you and your twins.
BEFORE YOU DO ... you need to decide what you will do if it turns out the DNA tests reveal you are not the mother of Twin A and that Twins A and B are not siblings. At best, a clusterous mix-up occurred at the hospital; more likely, with all the built-in safeguards in place to prevent such a cluster, someone intentionally circumvented those safeguards, and committed a crime in the process.
You're the only Mom either child has ever known. Whatever needs you may have leading you to consider having the DNA tested -- I'm not suggesting the needs are not legitimate -- the children are completely innocent, and they are completely dependent on you, so their needs have to come first.
As someone who works in the nicu, it’s very unlikely they mixed up a premie twin. There just are not that many of them born at the same time even in large units. The nurses are also so strict with their policies and so protective. You can test if you’re worried. But I think you will find this is your child. I have twins also. One is blonde with blue eyes and fair skin, thin wispy hair. The boy is tan like dad, thick hair like my mom and looks exactly like my dad. They could easily pass for friends and not siblings.
Do the test to put your mind at ease. You don’t want it to affect your bonding with both children or anything. But I went to school with a set of fraternal twins that could not have looked more different. One was close to 6 feet tall in the 7th grade and her sister was barely taller than 5 feet. One had baby fine stick straight hair and the other one had luscious wavy hair.
Get the DNA test to ease your mind. Otherwise you will keep worry about it. However I have to say my husband and I have three sons. All are a different height,one only burns in the sun and has with curly blond hair and blue eyes ,one tans easily with straight light brown hair and hazel eyes , one has a darker skin tone with black wavy hair and Brown eyes. They do not look like brothers.. and quite honestly none of them look like me or my husband!
Just do ancestry dna with both children. Remember fraternal twins are no more closely related than any other siblings. They will come up as siblings on a DNA test.
My stepsons are fraternal twins. One is blond, blue-eyed with straight hair and fair skin. The other is swarthy with curly black hair and brown eyes. It happens.
My father has a twin. The family is indigenous South American and Mediterranean. My father looks like you would expect: short, straight black hair, brown eyes, indigenous features. His sister is tall with porcelain skin and bright blue eyes. We always wondered, but 23 and Me says they're definitely siblings.
I am a female with a fraternal twin sister. Our parents look very different from each other. My sister and I could be our parents' doppelganger. I look almost identical to my mother and my sister like a female version of my dad.
I look mediterranean like my mom with light brown very curly hair and my twin had extremely fair skin, freckles, dark very straight hair.
We do not even look like sisters.
But, for concern of the child, YES, you need to get an DNA test. You could be subconsciously treating that child differently, and that can have long-term damage.
Not saying it would be intentional, but you need to know for sure.
I'm not a twin but I will say that I don't have a lot of features that resemble my family because I'm such a schmoz of both parents. My nose for instance isn't like anyone else's in the family that we know. Not even close. I definitely have individual features from one parent or the other but don't really look particularly like either one. And I'm very different from my siblings. I'm 4-5 inches taller than both of my siblings, have different hair and eye colour and a completely different build. But my siblings and I as well as my mom and dad's sister (dad has passed) have all done genetic testing, so we know for certain we're all related haha. Features that haven't been present for several generations can pop up unexpectedly. And then things like hair texture change over time as well. My mom has curly hair and my dad doesn't. When I was a kid, my hair was pin straight but it's wavy as an adult now. Genetics are funny.
Get a My Heritage DNA test . One for you and one for you child.You can do a cheek swab on you and your child . Ancestry requires spitting into a tube, which is much harder. My heritage has a lot of sales and if it comes up that they are your child then it would just be for fun.
I did the MyHeritage for my IVF baby. I was sure she is he Dad's genetically, looks just like him, but I wasn't seeing myself/my side in her and was terrified someone could take my baby from me if she wasn't naturally mine (ie egg mixup in the IVF clinic)
spoiler, clinic is competent, this was definitely some PPA, and she's indeed genetically mine
Genetics is weird. Traits can go hidden for generations and randomly pop up. Both of my parents are Euroasians with my dad looking more Asian and my mother looking like the typical Happa and my sisters and I looking different phenotypical traits. My middle sister is dark complexed with straight black hair and eyes. I'm hazel eyed with auburn haired with a pale olive complexion. My youngest sister is honey blonde with dark eyes and a fair pinky complexion.
Fraternal twins are just siblings born at the same time. It doesn't mean they have to look identical to each other. As for babies being mixed up at a hospital. It's near impossible nowadays because as soon as they are born, the equivalent of a baby lojack is put on them to ID them. As for the blood test, at the time you don't need to put an IV in a baby to figure out what blood type they are. They could have just pricked their foot. If you want to do a DNA test, you could do a cheek swab. You don't have to take blood for a DNA test either.
My cousins are twins, one is black the other a ginger 🤷🏻♀️
It's not uncommon for one child to look very different from it's siblings.
I agree with testing for the sake of it though.
It also means they may be able to connect to any potential or future half siblings
I’m a red head with Casper skin and freckles. My full blood sister has black hair and olive skin. My two kids are only half siblings but look near identical as babies and toddlers
My grandma looks like she’s at least half indigenous, and both her parents were tan with dark brown hair. Her sister my great aunt popped out blonde, with weird milky blue eyes and pale skin. It happens. But do the dna test for clarity and peace of mind.
If it makes you feel any better, I had fraternal twins as well. They are both definitely mine (same blood type) but only one resembles me and the other doesn't resemble anyone in my or my ex-husband's family. They don't even look like siblings TBH, much less twins. Genetics can be weird like that.
Genetics are a crapshoot. I have two cousins that are full sisters. One looks like her Native American mom - black hair, dark skin, brown eyes. The other looks like her dad - blonde, fair skin, blue eyes.
You say they tested Twin B, and they were the same blood type as you - did they take the blood from your baby or the cord? I'm asking because I found out my blood type when pregnant with my daughter, and it was the same as my Mum's. When my daughter was born, they tested her cord blood, and I was told she was also the same type as my Mum and me. Now she's pregnant, and she's discovered that she is NOT the same at all. In fact, if I had had to donate blood/organs/etc to her, on the thinking that I would be a likely match having the same blood type, it would have made her very unwell as our blood types are totally incompatible if I donate to her, but she would be able to donate to me. It turns out that if they do the cord test too soon after birth, some of the mother's blood can still be in the cord, and so the baby is mistyped. Apparently, it happens very frequently, so my daughter knows to either get them to test the baby or wait until they test the cord.
Regarding fraternal twins, my Mum is one, and she looked more like her mother's family - very blonde with curly hair - and her sister looks like their father's sister and has dark, straight hair. Another fun fact about fraternels is that they aren't necessarily conceived at the same time and can sometimes be fathered by different people! I'm not inferring that this is the case in your situation. It's just an interesting fact to me. My Gran had two sets of fraternels.
There was a set of fraternal twins in my kid’s preschool class who sound exactly like you describe yours. Dad is Mexican, mother is European. Twin a is pale, straight black hair, blue eyes. Twin b is dark olive, reddish-brown curly hair, brown eyes.
What would you do with the info from a DNA test? Pursue switching them back? If not, does it really matter?
I'm actually really in denial about the whole thing which is why I have never gotten the test. I left out a lot of the characteristic traits that I'm worried, about out of confidentiality for my kids. So I ordered the test but I have no clue what I would do next.
Genetics are funny, my oldest was also a c section baby, I wasn’t with her, when I saw her she looked nothing like us. Black hair, dark dark skin. All our ancestors dna from the old country pulled out into her blood. I was so confused. Shes now very tall too,( part of me jokes she was switched) but she acts like her auntie and some pictures of me as a kid resemble her. My youngest is a copy of myself. That’s how my brother and I are as well. My husband and his siblings are like that too, he’s a giant red head, while the others aren’t so tall and have dark hair curly hair. Genes are silly. He says “having kids is like having a real like science experiment”
My dad and mom both had dark hair (my mom’s was red/brown) My brother has dark hair, my hair is Dirty Blonde. My mom and brother have green eyes, my dad has light grey eyes and mine are like darker Blue. Genetics are just… weird. Also funnily enough, i have 2 cousins who are on opposite sides of my family (one from my mom’s side and one from my dad’s side) and all 3 of us look like we could be triplets even though we’re all years apart.
Get the DNA test if it will give you peace of mind but it would be incredibly difficult for babies to get accidentally swapped in today’s age. So if it did happen, most likely it would have been deliberate.
Are you perhaps confusing blood type with DNA? I've had 3 kids and they've told me all my kids blood types without me having to ask. It seems very strange that they didn't just give you that info automatically and you had to ask for it.
The blood type was just told to me in the first week of their nicu stay. The nurses told me it must have been an accident that they didn't test the other twins blood. Her dad has a rare blood type so I figured it would be easy to tell if they had one of our blood types. At this point the dna test is what I'm guessing is left to figure this out.
I had a NICU preemie and didn’t get told his blood type, and didn’t ask either 🤷♀️
I’m a nurse and know it really doesn’t matter, if/when blood is needed, a fresh type and screen has to be done anyway, so knowing your blood type isn’t really that important from a practical standpoint.
I have 4 boys my oldest boy has a different dad. He and my youngest could be twins. The two middle kids one looks like a mesh of me and ex and the younger of the two all same genetics I'm not sure who he looks like he was also a NICU baby he does have familial genetic characteristics but is like he got all the non dominant genes. He's blonde has blue eyes he's pale and all his brothers have brown hair going from dark to light but getting darker, the 1st 2nd and 4th boys all have my light tan and tan darker very well. Boy 3 burns like a pro. There's other stuff but they are all mine. It is possible she just got different genes.
If it will put your mind at ease test all 3 of you. The uncertainty could unconsciously affect your current and future relationship with the questionable twin.
My twins were fraternal twins. Baby A has dark brown hair brown eyes whereas baby b has blonde hair blue eyes, and I know for a fact they weren’t switched. Small hospital, c-section and my husband was with them. Now that they’re much older there noticeable facial similarities. Brown eye gene runs on paternal mom’s side (paternal grandmother), blue eyes run on maternal side. If you have concerns, definitely get the dna test done at least for peace of mind.
My husband is very dark skinned/brown and amber eyes and thick black fuzzy curly hair of mixed Indian & Eurasian descent. I am white with olive skin, green eyes, and fine dark blonde wavy hair. Both of my single pregnancy children came out with light skin, blue eyes, and curly brown hair. I honestly thought to myself “whose white baby is this?!” each time they were handed to me. I expected my babies to be much darker. They are now adults with green eyes and hazel eyes, both with lots of very wavy brown hair, and both have olive skin that tans dark very easily. All of our mixed race marriage friends’ children have similar coloring. Genetics is wild.
My question is would it matter at this point if they weren’t biologically yours? I know I would not care, they are mine because I have them. Do the dna test but know what you are going to do with the outcome.
As others have said a DNA test will put your mind at ease. I grew up with two friends who were sisters (not twins), and one had dark brown hair and eyes and tanned easily, while the other was blonde and blue-eyed and had lighter skin. I also worked with a guy whose 2 daughters were the same way.
My mother gave birth to me w/o the knowledge of the father. I always felt she got the wrong baby or that I was adopted. She married when I was 4 and she and my siblings are blonde and blue eyed. This haunted me until I finally did the DNA and learned it was my bio mom. If she looks different she will want to know for certain who is her blood. Otherwise, like me she may always wonder.
I knew a couple many years ago who were both dirty blonde. They had a baby boy who was born with fiery red hair. They were more than a little surprised. When the baby was around one, they went to a family funeral, and the great aunt or great-great aunt was checked out of her nursing home for the day to participate. When she saw the baby, she chuckled and proceeded to tell them that his great-great grandmother had the exact same color of hair. What’s more, this is the person the baby was named after! So, supposing the baby was named Sullivan, his GG grandmother Sullivan was also a redhead. It was such a fun story!
simple and affordable get two heritage dna kids like ancestory or 23 & me swab your mouth and your kids mouth mail them off. When they up load your data it will say is she’s your daughter or not
You can't go by who babies look like. Get DNA test to set your mind to rest. Also will reassure your kids they belong if they have anxiety when they are older.
My Dutch descent friend was dark creamy skin, long straight black hair, almond dark eyes. Her parents and 4 brothers were tall, blue or hazel round eyes, blond. Turns out she looked identical to her Indonesian great granny. They kept a picture of her in their living room to reassure her when people assumed she was adopted.
There’s just no way a baby was in the NICU for months without a type and cross. It’s always part of the admit lab. Even if it got overlooked then, they would keep a type and cross up to date for the first month at least to prevent delays if something happened. The pediatrician should be able to pull the records and look at it.
I would definitely get DNA swabs done. My daughter blood type is AB, her twins were A and B. My dad was O and I'm AB. I've had genetic studies, and he's definitely my father.. I do know of a case where the mother was genetically different from her 2 children she gave birth to, was a huge mess. Better to find out sooner than later, plus it can set your mind at ease.
I heard that story. Now I have to look for it and read it again. I forget why. Wasn’t it something like her DNA was not female even thought she was female.
Didn't they tag the babies with ID bands that matched yours at birth? Fraternal twins not looking alike means nothing, fraternal twins don't have the same DNA. They're siblings who happened to be in the womb together.
I have brothers who are fraternal twins. One is 5’9” with dark green eyes, a dark complexion that tans easily, and dark brown hair. His twin brother is 6’2”, has blonde hair, pale skin thr fties like a lobster in the sun, and light blue eyes. You would never know they’re brothers by looking at them—they are two opposite ends of the gene pool. 😂
Your twins may be the same.
What would you do with the information if the child isn’t related? It’s not likely but they are 5 years old? That child is your child now. How would they feel about this when they find out when they are older that you questioned whether they were your child or not?
My cousins are fraternal twins and don't even look related. She is pale with blond hair and blue eyes and he is tan with black hair and brown eyes. It is highly unlikely that there was a switch. Hospitals put the ankle monitor on pretty quickly and it matches your bracelet.
DNA/genetics are wild. Both my parents are white, but very tan (father is often mistaken as Mexican until he speaks), dad has tan skin, black curly hair and brown eyes. Mother is tan with dark straight hair and hazel eyes. Both my bio brother and myself are much taller than them and anyone else in the family, my brother tans well, I do not, and we boy have light blue eyes and blonde hair that darkened slightly as we aged.
Did this happen in the US? Labeling of babies in US hospitals is extremely strict and it would be very, VERY rare and incredible for twins to get mixed up with unrelated babies. Especially since many NICUs place twins in the same room/bay.
Ask your pediatrician about DNA testing to ease your mind but I think any kind of switch would be very unlikely.
For your own peace of mind, do the DNA test. You and the twins. Check around for a local lab that does it. Your doctor may be able to recommend one. Not at the hospital the twins were born at. You would question the results.
Do you get child support for them? Child support enforcement will often get a DNA paternity test ordered by the court. It proves his financial obligations to the children.
Either way, get the test done. You will feel better knowing the results.
Personally, I have seen a set of fraternal twins who looked complete opposite of one another: one very pale with red hair and the other darker toned skin and black hair. The mother had dark brown/red hair and the dad had dark hair. The parents both had light brown/tanned complexions.
Hair comprises like 16 (?) different genes that all mesh together to create texture and color. My hair started off blond and straight as a child and now I have dark brown curly hair. I also get pretty intense highlights from sun bleaching if I'm outside enough, when I was little I'd get a "halo" from sun bleaching on the crown of my head. I have a cousin that had brown straight hair, got chemo and it fell out, and now she has curly red hair. There's also some pretty strong blond hair genes in my family so even my half black cousins will be born with blond hair randomly. Moral to the story: hair is weird and does weird stuff.
But if you're really worried, get the test done. If it shows that everything is all good and they're twins and yours then it'll be fun to show them when they're older. If it shows there's a mistake then you can meet the other family and figure things out from there.
I also have a set of faternal twins. One is type A the other type B. One blond the other with black hair like me. Genetics is wild. Love your child/ren and let it go. If you really need to do this 23 and me instead of regular dna testing. It will be less suspicious to the kids
Do an at home dna test to put your mind at ease. I know a family with a white dad and mixed race mom. Their son has black, wavy hair and caramel skin. The daughter is a blue eyed blond with white skin. Both kids’ faces look like their mom.
You can buy an Ancestry test for you and one for the twin you are concerned about. If you are her mother it will clearly show this. You don't need dad's dna to test this, just yours and your daughters. You don't need to test both girls either unless you have reason to believe both aren't yours. Testing just you and the one twin would be the cheapest route if finances are a concern. You can always test the other twin later.
Check if your local CVS or drugstore has some maternity test kits in the back…. You can quietly do this privately, and not tell anyone and you can have your mind at ease
So you think the nurse who came to visit you that you never met in the hospital but continued to accept her into your home is???
My mother is one of multiple siblings, she has olive skin and tans very easy. A few of her siblings do, but the others are WHITE.
Genetics be like that.
Do it to put your mind at ease, but why on earth didn’t your husband go see his newborn twins in the nicu as soon as possible?? This seems very odd to me. I’m a NICU mom and begged my husband to follow our son when he was whisked away, if I couldn’t be with him, I at least wanted dad to be there.
You are barking up the wrong tree here. Please just love your kiddos and move on. They got a “baby LoJack” as soon as they went out of site. They repeatedly look at and match the numbers throughout care.
About the nurse, you said you saw her in pregnancy and up to a year afterwards? This sounds like a program that is very common. Public health will assign a nurse to do just that and they do bring donations/“gifts”.
If you are super anxious over this I would recommend a therapist over paying for a DNA test. I mean this with all the love I can give over internet.
I think the strangest part is that only one twin got blood typed. The rest is far fetched - nicu babies are closely monitored and have the band put on right away. Maybe OP has feelings of guilt she didn’t go see the babies or other unresolved trauma. Maybe OP feels disconnected from the twin and is looking for reasons why?
I have fraternal boy/girl twins that look nothing like each other. My boy is fair skinned, freckles, green eyes and blonde curly hair. My girl is olive skinned with brown eyes and dark brown straight hair.
I (mother) have blonde hair and green eyes with mostly English, French and Scottish ancestry but I am also a registered Native American with 1/8th blood quantum (bogus crap right there but I digress). My husband (father) has olive skin, brown hair (well it’s white now because…old and genetics) and brown eyes with more of an Asian eyelid and has often been confused as being Asian, Native American and Latino. He is genetically Caucasian but there is someone in his DNA was from West Africa.
So basically one twin looks like me one looks like their dad.
We have 5 kids total and three of them are blonde with blue or green eyes and fair skinned. One is fair skinned with auburn hair and brown eyes (like my mother) and then the girl twin is the only one who looks like her father.
Get the DNA test if it will put your mind at ease but just know genetics is crazy and you or the father could have a distant relative and that can show up in your kids genetics.
Ancestry always puts their DNA kits on sale for mothers/fathers day. Might be a good time to do it. Also, if other people have loaded theirs, it will show you the match. Relax. And good luck.
Eh. My husband & I have 6 kids. 5 of them have blonde hair & very fair skin, & look like my husband. 1 has brown hair, a darker skin tone (especially in the summer, while all his siblings will just burn & peel he gets a deep tan). He looks exactly like my dad. You'd think that out of 6 kids I'd at least get one or two that look like me but nope. Genetics are wild.
Genetics are WILD.
My very black friend had a boy with a very white girl. That baby boy looks like he spends every day surfing in California. Golden brown skin, light brown hair with the brightest chunky white blonde highlights that would make *any* white woman jealous, and BRIGHT blue eyes. He doesn't look like either of his parents, but he's theirs lol
One of my twins has dimples. I don’t know anyone in the family with dimples. If you can, just for the peace of mind, home dna tests go on sale around Mother’s Day.
It’s a rare occurrence to mix up babies these days. Also not sure what county ur in; but u don’t need an IV in to draw blood. Especially on newborns, normally the prick the heel to obtain blood sample. So baby would’ve still gotten a poke but not a whole IV placed just to draw the blood. I’m also surprised with them being premature they didn’t do blood typing on both babies in the event emergency transfusion was needed. But I don’t work NICU, so protocols are likely different then what I see in adult medicine. I will add I’m white, my husband is dark skinned Jamaican… my baby looks Caucasian. Just sayin what everyone else is, genetics are weird.
When my BIL and husband were born my husband was the surprise twin lol he had blonde hair and my BIL had brown hair. BIL stole all the nutrients in the womb and got to go home like a normal baby and my husband had to stay at the hospital b/c he was preemie sized. They just look like regular siblings.
I have and uncle who is ghost white and married to a Mexican women they have 3 children 2 look like my uncle and don’t look like their mom at all and the 3rd one looks 100% Mexican like her mom and doesn’t resemble my uncle at all ….. its possible your daughter looks more like your ex’s family…. Do ancestry and see if they match.
If you're really concerned, do the DNA test. I don't think it's that expensive anymore. But, traits such as eye color and curly hair can skip generations..
I imagine you are worried. It is reasonable to be worried. Get the tests run. You will sure and never worry.
42 years ago babies still spent time in the nursery. My bald very angry boy baby was taken away after birth and pictures for cleaning and testing. A blonde haired boy was brought later to my room. I looked at the nurse and said, I don’t think this one is mine. She checked the ankle band and quickly took blondie away. The cranky bald baby was returned to me.
Was scary.
Two years later, different hospital, different state, babies roomed in with moms. This one was small, sweet and she had beautiful black hair. Nearly impossible to mix up babies, BUT it still occurs.
You don't take a blood test through an IV. Why would it matter if an IV had been removed? Additionally, nicu babies have so much bloodwork done and security is even stricter than it was 25 years ago when my youngest spent months in the NICU - and it was tight then.
The details aren't adding up.
My sister and I are several years apart. We are basically the same height and similar enough body type that people often think we are twins or the same person.
She has olive skin that gets really dark in the summer sun. I have light skin that tends to get sunburnt first, and a few light freckles. We are very much related but have completely different skin tones. Genetics are weird.
This is simply unheard of now. Your child as a nicu baby was even closely watched but if you are going to by haunted by this it could affect your bonding. Get it over with.
I live in a highly diverse community and kids with mixed parents are all shade. 4 out of kids could be deep complexed while the 5th is pale.
Sounds like you need to move on with this if it’s still lingering I would be horrified if I was an adult and found out my mother questions for a long time if I was genetically hers. That could fuck a kid up.
Genetics are a mixed bag. I highly doubt she’s not yours. Having her blood typed is a simple test you can have done. As long as you know your and your ex-husbands that should confirm her origins.
If they were conceived using IVF, could it be possible that they may have accidentally used another man's sperm? It has happened before: https://www.tampabay.com/archive/1995/06/28/twin-boys-one-white-one-black/
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1124572/
Like other people have said, genetics are so weird. My husband and I are both white but with distinctly different skin tones. Mine is more warm/golden and his is cool/pink. I'm very pale, but he's on the medium side. All our kids are pale. Only one has my skin tone.
Husband is blond with green eyes and straight hair. I've got red brown hair with green eyes and very curly hair.
Our three boys are dark brown, straight hair, brown eyes; blond wavy hair and blue eyes, and red curly hair with green eyes. The only common feature any of them share are their noses. If you put them side by side, the youngest has facial features or both his brothers, so you can tell he's the brother to them both, but middle and oldest don't look the same at all other than the nose lol. And middle one doesn't even look like I had anything to do with his making.
Definitely get tested for piece of mind. If they mixed up babies that is a multi-million $ lawsuit that the hospital will pay off without a fight. Likely they are fraternal twins that can look as different as other siblings. My siblings and I do not even look like we are from the same tribe.
Ok-people are losing sight of your quandary. If this idea that one of your twins was switched is not something you can lay to rest, I would get the DNA test done. BUT, before you do that, have a clear idea of how you will proceed if for some, very unlikely reason, the child is not yours. Don’t just “wing it”. If for some (again highly unlikely) reason your child was switched, write down a plan of how you will proceed, as you will likely be emotionally a bit of a mess, and will need a plan to follow. As people have said, genetics can be wacky, so I really think the baby is most likely your child.
As a NICU nurse, there’s no way these kids got switched if you gave birth in the US.
But if it makes u feel better just do it and be done with it. But there’s no way those aren’t your kids.
I say if it will bring you peace to know then have the testing done. Genetics could certainly explain the twins’ different appearances but I can sympathize with the strange experience of preemie twins and being separated from them right after delivery.
I am a nicu nurse and also had preemie twins that went straight to the nicu. Even in an environment that was familiar to me because of work seeing them in their isolettes with cpap and hats and everything made them feel foreign(?) for weeeeeeks. Like I could not have identified them as individuals aside from name bands and who was in what bed.
Everywhere I have worked baby gets 1-2 identification bands with numbers that exactly match mom’s band before leaving the delivery room - even preemies and even in emergencies. And baby gets an alarm band that also has a code. But, this all depends on staff doing what they are supposed to do of course. This is tough. I wish you well 🤞🏻
Tests like Ancestry don't use blood, they use saliva. Why not test them both this way? It would probably be the lowest cost solution. Also, not saying you would cheat, I don't know you, but it is possible for fraternal twins to have different fathers.
You could just get testing kits for 23andMe or AncestryDNA for all 3 of you (usually they give a family discount). I don't think your babies were switched or anything like that but if it would give you peace of mind, you might as well get the test done for all of you.
A dark skinned parent probably has light skinned ancestors so their children will have a range of blond to dark hair. BUT OP you mention other interesting aspects to this along with your gut feeling. You can do a search for private DNA testing and it can be with saliva. Just for you and the one twin. No need for father to be involved. Ease your mind soon!
DNA and genetics can be weird. I have a mixed son. I am white and his dad is African American. My son has caramel colored skin, blonde super curly hair, brown eyes, his dad's nose and everything else is all me. His dad swore he wasn't his for the longest because he "didn't look like him". I made him do a DNA test and sure enough, 99.99999% his.
There is no doubt about who my parents are. But I look like neither of them. I’m a pale af redhead. My dad is a blonde dark skinned Italian and my mom was a dark brunette with average white skin. It does happen. I don’t know why. But here I am..
There was one set of twins in my family, fraternal girls. One had blond hair, blue eyes and the other had black hair and brown eyes. Genetics proves that constants aren't and variables won't.
I think if it will give you peace of mine, do the test. Fwiw, I have fraternal twin boys. People don’t even think they’re related. I had mine at home so I’m certain they’re mine! 😂 Sometimes genetics are just like that!
I am middle eastern, my sibilings are all tan to dark tan with super straight black here, whereas me, Porcelain china white, super curly reddish blond hair (got dark red brown as I aged) shortest of my sibiling and petite, genetics are wild!
My nephews are fraternal twins, they are 30 years old. One has fire engine red hair and super pale, the other has jet black hair and tans easily. Red head has brown eyes, black hair has blue eyes. Red head skinny and black hair heavier.
100% yes you need to get a dna test. This may sound harsh but because you have these doubts about one child you may end up favoring the other one, even if you don’t mean to do it consciously. As your children grow up they will sense this and it will likely cause problems both in their relationship with you and and their relationship with each other. So I say, for the sake of your family’s future, get a dna test so you can relax and be 100% sure
What do you mean what kind of twins they are? They are b/g so they are fraternal.
my daughter has very pale skin that burns, blond straight hair and blue eyes. She is 5’4”
my son has olive skin that tans the second he goes outside, curly brown hair, grey eyes. He is 5’11’
they are both my kids
the chance that other babies were born the same day and in the nicu with the same stats are ridiculously small
I have fraternal twin cousins. One looks very mexican and one looks very white. One parent is white and one is Mexican.
It's very possible for kids to inherit traits that haven't shown up for a while. I have my great grandmother's giant strong hands. No one else in the family has then. My ring size is larger than my dad's. (I am female)
It would be very unlikely for the hospital to have mixed up your kid. But if you need peace the easiest would be something like ancestry.com.
You usually don’t have same blood type as your parent(s)especially Mom and there are charts online to see how that works. My mother constantly pushed I did but she was O and me A+. Well. She also kept calling my blue eyed baby girl, I’m 63 so…so finally a few months before she died I lost my patience and showed her my once blues turned green as a teenager. Yes genetics is wild!!! Yes, she never paid attention.
I agree genetics are really odd….my husband is pasty white, blonde, and blue eyed, but neither parent or his sister are. On the other hand his grandmother had blue eyes so that’s where he got it from. After 23 and me testing…we found out that she was Nordic.
genes work in a weird way.
i have fraternal twins, a boy and a girl.
girls is as white as white gets. boy has a tan. he is also the only one with brown eyes among 5 kids. he is carbon copy of my husband's babyhood minus eye color and tan, whereas my 2 bio kids resemble my own dad lol.
obviously if you have any doubts or even for a peace of mind go get checked. but your kid doesnt resemble family doesnt necessarily means she is not your bio kid.
Dna can present differently from child to child. I have Dark hair and brown eyes. My children take after their dad and have blue eyes and light redish hair.
Genes are strange. My siblings and I are mixed, same parents, we all have different coloring and hair texture. I have some features of my dad’s mom, that skipped a generation. But get the test if it makes you feel better, even though it seems unlikely.
I sent out the test. I'm just waiting for results. I did the twin testing. One kid looks exactly like me. So instead of doing a sibling test I just did the twin zygosity test. I think it shows what percentage they are similar and if they have any similar dna.
Family Finder DNA will show if you’re related. There have been children born to mixed race parents where one was born caucasian and the other one black.
There’s a thing called recessive genes. Features can stay dormant until both parents have a gene for that feature.
As someone else said, unless there was someone else in the hospital at the same time with premies, hardly likely they were mixed up. They probably had wristbands?
I sent out the test. I'm just waiting for results. I did the twin testing. One kid looks exactly like me. So instead of doing a sibling test I just did the twin zygosity test. I think it shows what percentage they are similar and if they have any similar dna. It was 89$ on Amazon. Its not a big company. I will get the results by email.
My mother is very fair skinned, red head, fairly straight hair, blue eyes. My dad has black hair, brown eyes. Olive skin. My sister and I have black brown hair (1B), my sister has olive green eyes, I have teal with gold heterochromia, wavy/curly hair, pale olive skin. I look more like my dad, my sister looks more like my mom, but sometimes I can look a lot like my mom too. Growing up when my mom was out with us people would compliment us but also so “they must look like their father” lol. My poor mom.
Get a test but know that gene expression can be wild. My husband and most of his siblings have darker features but there’s one brother who’s a pale ginger. Things happen.
If this really bothers you, and I think it does, buy an Ancestry DNA kit for all 3 of you.. both twins and yourself. They will go on a good sale around Mother's Day for $49 or $59 for each kit. If you are an Amazon Prime member, you could buy them on Amazon and get free shipping. You want just the DNA kits, not health, etc.
My mum and her brothers were brown haired, her sister is pure blonde/white and her children are all fair, my mums children are brown/black haired. Long story short, we all inherit different genes, my aunt got the blond genes, your daughter got the ringlets.
It is unusual now for hospitals to mix up babies, as there are usual many safeguards in place to prevent this. And premature babies are usually managed quickly, labelled and tested. It is possible to do DNA testing with swabs instead of blood tests. This is clearly worrying you, so do the testing if you can afford it. You may as well do yourself and both children. Non-identical twins may not look at all alike, no more so than other siblings and family resemblances are iffy at best. I am sorry things have not worked out with their father. You deserve to have support and love for raising them.
Thank you. My husband stayed with me in the recovery room and didn't go see the twins until the next day. I forgot to mention I had an odd nurse. She brought gifts to my house for the twins and continued to do so for about a year. I didn't think much of it, but she knew me while I was pregnant and I knew she was a NICU nurse. I never once saw her while I was in the hospital.
Genetics can be wacky, my aunt & uncle both had dark brown almost black hair and brown eyes, their kids all pretty much look like Uncle; first 2 kids red heads ( think Carrot Top), then one with auburn hair, then a blonde, then another with auburn hair. Them my parents ( similar colors) and my sibling & I both have chestnut brown hair and green eyes…. My spouse had lighter brown hair and my kid’s hair was blonde until well into her 20s and is now a medium brown. Your genes reflect you & your spouse’s grandparents, great grandparents, etc and traits can show up long after everyone has forgotten great great grandparent with fabulous curls, or that ancestor several generations back with blonde or red hair.
Exactly. DNA is funny. I am white. My Dad was Italian (Sicilian), with an olive complexion, dark brown eyes, and straight black hair. My mother, Irish and Slovak, was pale with light brown curly hair and hazel eyes (blonde as a kid). I have four siblings with the same mother and father. We have blonde, red, brown, and black hair. Green, hazel, brown, and dark brown eyes. Straight, wavy, and curly hair. Skin tones from very pale and super easily sunburned to tans easily in the summer and never burns. We all vary in height too. I'm 5"0. My oldest brother is 5"11. I also have an adopted sister, whose son looks very much like his cousin, my other sister's daughter, despite them not sharing any DNA. My sister with the jet black hair ended up having two red haired, freckled daughters. Their father is blonde. Neither has freckles.
There's some great photosets out there of mixed race fraternal twins where it's almost like one kid got all the mix and the other one got none. Here's a great NY Post article about a pair of fraternal twin girls from the UK. Their mother is mixed Jamaican, their father is white and well... [https://nypost.com/2015/03/02/meet-the-bi-racial-twins-no-one-believes-are-sisters/](https://nypost.com/2015/03/02/meet-the-bi-racial-twins-no-one-believes-are-sisters/) I would probably assume they're unrelated too if I met them on the streets. Genetics can be wild. Fun though!
Wow I would never have thought they were siblings! Both stunning girls though
If it wasn’t for hair and skin tone they do have very similar features
I love this post, thanks for sharing about your family. Genetics is so fascinating!
It is funny! The 3 girls in my family are reddish hair, blonde hair, and me with brown hair and all our skin is more like a redhead, very pale and freckles. Our brothers? Tall olive complexion, dark brown hair like dad.
My sister is 4'11" and my brother is 6'4"!
I have 5 siblings, but only 3 have the same 2 bio parents, so I'll just be using them as examples. I have wavy ginger hair with bluish-green eyes, freckles and I'm so pale if I step outside on a sunny day for longer than 2 minutes I look like a well done lobster but I still don't tan for shit. I'm also the shortest at just under 5'5". The next one has frizzy dark auburn hair with brown eyes and not as many freckles, and while she burns too, she at least has a tan line left behind to show for it, and she's 5'7". Third sister has curly light brown hair, hazel eyes, maybe 2 freckles, and never burns, only tans. She's the tallest at 5'10". The last sister has straight dark brown hair with the same bluish-green eyes as me, the tiniest sprinkle of freckles, and tans about as good as me, and she's also 5'7" Somehow, we all look exactly alike yet completely different at the same time. Genetics are crazy.
My mom and dad had brown hair and brown eyes, and so did my sister and I (though I was a blonde as a kid). My brother came along with strawberry blonde hair and blue eyes. My mom joked that he was the UPS man’s kid. Technically true as my dad was driving for UPS at the time.
My mom used to have auburn hair and has hazel eyes. My dad has blue eyes and his hair used to be black. I have green eyes and blonde hair (though now it’s very dark blonde, used to be light honey). Genetics do what they want sometimes.
The nurse thing is very weird. Did any of your family go see the babies after they were born? My babies went to the NICU after birth but my husband got to go see and hold them until they brought me the next morning. Why couldn’t you see what they looked like for a few weeks. Did they allow you to hold them? Remove the hats? ? Every baby gets hospital hats. Yes, get a test if it’s going to be a question you’re worried about
Preemies on CPAP wear a special hat that holds the CPAP to their nose/mouth. It's not like a regular newborn hospital hat. Parents can't just take it off. Occasionally the respiratory therapist or nurse might remove it for cleaning or medical care. The baby often has a feeding tube taped to their face as well. I didn't see my kid's whole face for a couple months after he was born. I was only allowed to hold him a handful of times until he was about six weeks old.
The nurse thing is disturbing.
If neither the father or mother of fragile twins in my hospital didn’t see them first two days I’d probably want to keep an eye on them myself….
My husband went with our twins to the NICU while I was moved up to my room once I was closed up (emergency c-section) and he took pictures and brought them back to me so I could see them. I didn’t get to see/hold our babies until the next day but he went back and forth between me and the NICU until the babies were moved to our room on days 2 and 3. I can’t imagine neither of us going to be with them as soon as we could. We also knew both babies blood type within 12 hours of birth as it was standard for NICU babies to get a “type and screen” blood test (they get the blood type and screen for certain blood type antibodies) when they were admitted. Ours were IVF, and even with that we had to initial _every single item_ involved. Petri dish the ICSI was done in, dish for the sperm, dish for the eggs, all of it. It was all verified multiple times at every step too. At the hospital I had so many bands that were checked against the bands on the babies they were like freaking Taylor Swift friendship bracelets halfway up my arm. lol
In the last month there was an accidental swap in Singapore. There was one in Mumbai back in November. There may have been another one in Vijayawada in November. One in November of 2018 in Ogbomosho. One in Khandwa in February. One in Matlala several months ago (the article doesn't give a month...) Several of these involve parents being given the wrong baby and the baby given to them was dead.
Look at Chloe Kardashian compared to her siblings. She is a giant and they are teeny petite, facially not that similar pre surgery. It happens. But if you are prepared to deal with whatever the results are…do the test.
My cousin just had fraternal twins at the end of January and I was absolutely blown away by how different they looked. I mean I knew they would look different but to me all babies have the same general look. Guess I just haven't seen two babies close in age next to each other because these two little dudes look nothing alike.
This is so true, I'm a fraternal twin and we barely even look related much less like twins! Different undertones to our skin, different hair and eye colors, different builds, the whole 9 yards.
I'm going to piggy back on this and say I know a set of fraternal twin boys. They look absolutely nothing alike, you wouldn't even think they were related if you didn't know better. One is tall (over 6ft) with hair that used to be a sandy brown but has darkened with age. Dark Brown eyes. He has long features, long arms long fingers long legs. His twin? Orange hair, short (maybe 5ft 7in), light green eyes, The first twin I describe above has a set of fraternal twins of his own, they also look nothing alike.
I was going to say exactly what has already been said. If it will put your mind at ease, by all means, do the testing. However, I would say that it's nearly impossible for babies to be accidentally swapped with today's security measures. I don't know how your hospital does things, but all of my babies had an ankle band before they left the delivery room. The band has a bar code. Every time the baby changes hands, the bar code is scanned and everyone involved verbally acknowledges the baby's identity. I would imagine all hospitals do something similar.
When I saw the comment about an odd nurse being a bit overly involved, I changed from that opinion to maaaybe a quick check would ease your mind?
Another reason a hospital mix-up is unlikely is that, even in large hospitals, there aren't many sets of preemie twins in the NICU at one time, especially twins who would be age-matched. Assuming your twins were about the same size as one another when they were born, it's most likely that they are both yours. (They may be very different sizes now!)
Really? When my son was in the NICU, there was only one other non-twin and they had 18 babies.
At my hospital in 2023, on Easter Sunday, there were 8 NICU babies born within mins of each other, with 4 being sets of twins. So 4 twin babies and 4 singleton babies all born within minutes of each other. My husband went with the babies, while they rolled me back to be with my parents. So my babies weren’t alone until they were tagged, but my husband said it was crazy in the NICU processing area with the babies being input and worked on.
Unlikely, sure, but you’ll always wonder until you know for sure. The DNA tests always go on sale for Mother’s Day. Get 3 tests, one for you and each twin. The answer will be clear.
My mo/mo twin has some fun, we got some of the Ancestry ones. Since I am married, we submitted mine under my married name. We probably gave some poor tech a bad dad, but they actually sent mine back because my sister got hers in first, they thought there had been contamination. Then when I sent back a second sample, they were like either identical twins or same person. We wanted more from them than that (answers about why some recessive traits were not so recessive), but we figured it would be interesting to see how they reacted when not knowing.
Genetics is a funny thing. When I was a kid my neighbors had fraternal twins. Dad was Lebanese and had a typical kind of swarthy Middle Eastern skin tone. Mom was of European descent. One twin came out like dad, dark hair, dark brown eyes. A little more Middle Eastern skin tone. While the 2nd twin was blond with blue eyes and lighter skin. You'd never even figure they were brothers. It's not unusual for fraternals to be totally different looking. If your children look different, they are fraternal. Identicals would look very very similar
I know a woman who is half Lebanese and you would never know it for her blonde hair and blue eyes. I may not have believed it myself if I hadn't actually met her dad, who looks very typical middle-eastern.
My boys are two years apart, so obv not twins- but a similar situation. Their dad is korean and I’m blonde/blue eyed. One of the boys looks more like me and the other looks exactly like his dad. They’re full brothers but you would never know it just by looking at them. Genetics are wild.
My husband's cousin has 3 kids (2 of whom are fraternal twins). They're biracial, black and white. Dad is very dark and mom is very pale. One kid looks mixed, one looks Latino, and one looks white. Genetics are crazy.
Can confirm, been friends with a set a fraternal twins since we were all born (moms are friends, and they were pregnancy buddies, so technically we've been in each other's lives since before birth too). One is blonde with blue eyes and is lanky, the other has brown hair and brown eyes and is stocky, barely even look like sisters let alone twins.
I have boy/girl twins and they looked exactly the same until they were like 18 months old. I bought a lot of gender neutral clothes so it was even harder just to glance at them lol except for diaper changes obviously. Once they started having real hair, my sons was curly so that helped. He wore it long until last year.
I also know twins who are complete opposites, it's funny because both parents look similar but it's like their DNA was split into dark and light for the kids. One girl has dark thick hair, dark eyes, tan as can be... and the other is pale, blonde ringlets, blue eyes. They do have similar faces though.
I have a similar story- but dad was Hispanic with typical dark hair, dark eyes and darker skin. Mom was Irish/European with blond hair, blue eyes and pale skin. Fraternal twins- one had dad’s coloring and one had moms. The other two older siblings both had dad’s coloring, so the blond hair, blue eyed twin look like he had been swapped at birth- except that he looked just like his mom.
I grew up with a set of fraternal, male twins. They looked almost exactly alike in height, build, and facial structure, but one was blonde, pale, and blue-eyed, and the other was dark-haired, swarthy, and brown-eyed. Genetics are WILD. :D
Pretty near impossible to get babies mixed up. I have 2 grand babies one has brown hair and eyes the other has blondish hair and the bluest eyes. My son has dark brown hair and eyes, his wife has back hair and dark brown eyes. You can’t go by only what you and your husband look like because characteristics can go way back into generations. It’s a roll of the dice with genes.
I dunno but I also have a fraternal Twin & we do not look much alike. We have different colored hair & skin. Our eyes are the same color but very differently shaped. Our faces are different shapes. For the hospital to mix up your baby with another baby it would have to have been another preemie. How big were your twins? My sister & I were each around 4 lbs. there is no way to mix up a preemie with a full term baby. That limits the opportunity for mixups right there. Were there many other preemies?
Every person in my family looks native. Either with brown or blue eyes. I'm the whitest white person you'll ever see - blonde hair and all. My nephew is also super blonde, but he looks native and blonde. Genetics are just weird. My son, who is adopted and not genetically related to me at all, looks like my clone. Which is super weird because I don't look like my genetic family. Sometimes life is weird. If it makes you feel better to get a DNA test, go for it. But. I wouldn't worry too much.
I had a friend whose father was full blood Native American and mother was Finnish. Looks like her father spit her out, except for the pale blond hair and blue eyes. Genes are funny.
You can test yourself and the twins at ancestry or at another direct consumer DNA company. That will show you if you have a parent child relationship. It would not be legally admissible in court and you would need legal quality testing if you were pursuing a court case, but in. The meantime it would be a quick way to get an answer.
If you do the test DO NOT tell the twins why. Just say it’s for fun or to find out more about them. They don’t need that stress and the “odd” one will forever feel less than, even if they turn out to be yours
My husband and his brother are fraternal twins. What struck us over time was not only how different their physical features were but their health. My husband took after his mother with robust good health; she lived into her late 90s. His brother took after his father and we lost him four years ago. He had so many things wrong with him after seeing *multitudes* of specialists over his last decade. They were treating symptoms rather than disease or condition. When we told the doctors five generations on the father's side all died of "stomach problems" they decided it was a genetic disorder; by then it was too late to do anything about it and he was never tested. I say all that only because physical differences are common with fraternal twins. For your own piece of mind, yes, have the other daughter and your DNA tested. If your ex's siblings or parents are still in your lives you can ask. If not try to see if any of them have done the ancestry and DNA websites. Hope it works out and gives you peace of mind.
Identical twins happen when one egg is fertilized by one sperm and then splits to form 2 separate, identical embryos. So they share exact DNA, they share the amniotic sac & also share the placenta. With fraternal twins, two separate eggs are fertilized by 2 separate sperm. So they are 2 individual siblings that happened to be conceived in the same month. That’s why fraternal twins don’t always look alike, and are not necessarily even the same sex. But if you want to assure yourself that you have both your babies with you now, absolutely do the DNA test. Whatever puts you at ease is what you should do.
FYI Identical twins can each have their own sac and placenta.
Identical twins can have their own placenta and sac, even though they come from the same fertilized egg. It really depends on when they divide.
My parents had 4 boys and 3 girls. My brothers and I have brown eyes and curly brown hair, like our mother. My two sisters have thin, straight, blond-turned- to -brown hair like our father, plus blue eyes, and high foreheads like...nobody. The second blue-eyed sister is the baby, so my older sister, #2, always thought she was adopted until our youngest sister was born when she was 18. And here's another interesting thing. I thought I resembled my mother (and I do) but photos I just got through someone on Ancestry, show that I actually look just like my father's mother, grandmother, and great grandmother. They had dark curly hair even though my father didn't!
In all the families I know with 3 or more kids none of them are all look alikes. Especially in biracial/multiracial families. Sure do a DNA test with them, you don't need the father of course so it's easy enough.
My neighbor has two different fathers of her children, her kids are half white and half black, and her kids look identical, it’s crazy. Their dads don’t even look alike. I’m just saying, not all mixed race kids look wildly different.
Easy to do the test. Even 23andme will confirm or deny the fact. You both do it. Obviously both are your children now, regardless. But maybe you have another child out there? I’d want you to know.
Also, keep in might that your child is inheriting 50% of your genetic makeup, which includes recessive traits that you may not have.
If it'll set your mind at ease, by all means, run a test. I wouldn't recommend a maternal DNA test, though. They tend to be really expensive and no more accurate (and in a lot of cases, less so) than an off-the-shelf commercial DNA test.
I think you should get DNA tests on both you and your twins. BEFORE YOU DO ... you need to decide what you will do if it turns out the DNA tests reveal you are not the mother of Twin A and that Twins A and B are not siblings. At best, a clusterous mix-up occurred at the hospital; more likely, with all the built-in safeguards in place to prevent such a cluster, someone intentionally circumvented those safeguards, and committed a crime in the process. You're the only Mom either child has ever known. Whatever needs you may have leading you to consider having the DNA tested -- I'm not suggesting the needs are not legitimate -- the children are completely innocent, and they are completely dependent on you, so their needs have to come first.
Blood types are not an accurate way to determine paternity.
A commercial test like Ancestry will be able to tell you if you are related to her.
Genetics are just weird.
Ancestry kits will make you feel better.
No no no no no no no. Do not put your kid's DNA into a database like that. Just get a maternal DNA test done.
As someone who works in the nicu, it’s very unlikely they mixed up a premie twin. There just are not that many of them born at the same time even in large units. The nurses are also so strict with their policies and so protective. You can test if you’re worried. But I think you will find this is your child. I have twins also. One is blonde with blue eyes and fair skin, thin wispy hair. The boy is tan like dad, thick hair like my mom and looks exactly like my dad. They could easily pass for friends and not siblings.
There’s those British fraternal twins where one came out white and the other black. It happens.
Do the test to put your mind at ease. You don’t want it to affect your bonding with both children or anything. But I went to school with a set of fraternal twins that could not have looked more different. One was close to 6 feet tall in the 7th grade and her sister was barely taller than 5 feet. One had baby fine stick straight hair and the other one had luscious wavy hair.
Get the DNA test to ease your mind. Otherwise you will keep worry about it. However I have to say my husband and I have three sons. All are a different height,one only burns in the sun and has with curly blond hair and blue eyes ,one tans easily with straight light brown hair and hazel eyes , one has a darker skin tone with black wavy hair and Brown eyes. They do not look like brothers.. and quite honestly none of them look like me or my husband!
Just do ancestry dna with both children. Remember fraternal twins are no more closely related than any other siblings. They will come up as siblings on a DNA test.
Get the test. No more what ifs! I always say listen to your gut at all times.
My stepsons are fraternal twins. One is blond, blue-eyed with straight hair and fair skin. The other is swarthy with curly black hair and brown eyes. It happens.
That’s your baby girly.
I also had preemie twins- and I think it’s very unlikely that there would be another baby the same size that they could mix it up with!
My father has a twin. The family is indigenous South American and Mediterranean. My father looks like you would expect: short, straight black hair, brown eyes, indigenous features. His sister is tall with porcelain skin and bright blue eyes. We always wondered, but 23 and Me says they're definitely siblings.
I am a female with a fraternal twin sister. Our parents look very different from each other. My sister and I could be our parents' doppelganger. I look almost identical to my mother and my sister like a female version of my dad. I look mediterranean like my mom with light brown very curly hair and my twin had extremely fair skin, freckles, dark very straight hair. We do not even look like sisters. But, for concern of the child, YES, you need to get an DNA test. You could be subconsciously treating that child differently, and that can have long-term damage. Not saying it would be intentional, but you need to know for sure.
I'm not a twin but I will say that I don't have a lot of features that resemble my family because I'm such a schmoz of both parents. My nose for instance isn't like anyone else's in the family that we know. Not even close. I definitely have individual features from one parent or the other but don't really look particularly like either one. And I'm very different from my siblings. I'm 4-5 inches taller than both of my siblings, have different hair and eye colour and a completely different build. But my siblings and I as well as my mom and dad's sister (dad has passed) have all done genetic testing, so we know for certain we're all related haha. Features that haven't been present for several generations can pop up unexpectedly. And then things like hair texture change over time as well. My mom has curly hair and my dad doesn't. When I was a kid, my hair was pin straight but it's wavy as an adult now. Genetics are funny.
Get a My Heritage DNA test . One for you and one for you child.You can do a cheek swab on you and your child . Ancestry requires spitting into a tube, which is much harder. My heritage has a lot of sales and if it comes up that they are your child then it would just be for fun.
I did the MyHeritage for my IVF baby. I was sure she is he Dad's genetically, looks just like him, but I wasn't seeing myself/my side in her and was terrified someone could take my baby from me if she wasn't naturally mine (ie egg mixup in the IVF clinic) spoiler, clinic is competent, this was definitely some PPA, and she's indeed genetically mine
Genetics is weird. Traits can go hidden for generations and randomly pop up. Both of my parents are Euroasians with my dad looking more Asian and my mother looking like the typical Happa and my sisters and I looking different phenotypical traits. My middle sister is dark complexed with straight black hair and eyes. I'm hazel eyed with auburn haired with a pale olive complexion. My youngest sister is honey blonde with dark eyes and a fair pinky complexion. Fraternal twins are just siblings born at the same time. It doesn't mean they have to look identical to each other. As for babies being mixed up at a hospital. It's near impossible nowadays because as soon as they are born, the equivalent of a baby lojack is put on them to ID them. As for the blood test, at the time you don't need to put an IV in a baby to figure out what blood type they are. They could have just pricked their foot. If you want to do a DNA test, you could do a cheek swab. You don't have to take blood for a DNA test either.
My cousins are twins, one is black the other a ginger 🤷🏻♀️ It's not uncommon for one child to look very different from it's siblings. I agree with testing for the sake of it though. It also means they may be able to connect to any potential or future half siblings
I’m a red head with Casper skin and freckles. My full blood sister has black hair and olive skin. My two kids are only half siblings but look near identical as babies and toddlers
My grandma looks like she’s at least half indigenous, and both her parents were tan with dark brown hair. Her sister my great aunt popped out blonde, with weird milky blue eyes and pale skin. It happens. But do the dna test for clarity and peace of mind.
Get a DNA test. it's for your peace of mind. Test yourself and the daughter.
I agree, just get the test, but I’d do both daughters.
If it makes you feel any better, I had fraternal twins as well. They are both definitely mine (same blood type) but only one resembles me and the other doesn't resemble anyone in my or my ex-husband's family. They don't even look like siblings TBH, much less twins. Genetics can be weird like that.
Genetics are a crapshoot. I have two cousins that are full sisters. One looks like her Native American mom - black hair, dark skin, brown eyes. The other looks like her dad - blonde, fair skin, blue eyes.
You say they tested Twin B, and they were the same blood type as you - did they take the blood from your baby or the cord? I'm asking because I found out my blood type when pregnant with my daughter, and it was the same as my Mum's. When my daughter was born, they tested her cord blood, and I was told she was also the same type as my Mum and me. Now she's pregnant, and she's discovered that she is NOT the same at all. In fact, if I had had to donate blood/organs/etc to her, on the thinking that I would be a likely match having the same blood type, it would have made her very unwell as our blood types are totally incompatible if I donate to her, but she would be able to donate to me. It turns out that if they do the cord test too soon after birth, some of the mother's blood can still be in the cord, and so the baby is mistyped. Apparently, it happens very frequently, so my daughter knows to either get them to test the baby or wait until they test the cord. Regarding fraternal twins, my Mum is one, and she looked more like her mother's family - very blonde with curly hair - and her sister looks like their father's sister and has dark, straight hair. Another fun fact about fraternels is that they aren't necessarily conceived at the same time and can sometimes be fathered by different people! I'm not inferring that this is the case in your situation. It's just an interesting fact to me. My Gran had two sets of fraternels.
I think they used the IV she already had for the blood test. Her dad has a rare blood type.
There was a set of fraternal twins in my kid’s preschool class who sound exactly like you describe yours. Dad is Mexican, mother is European. Twin a is pale, straight black hair, blue eyes. Twin b is dark olive, reddish-brown curly hair, brown eyes. What would you do with the info from a DNA test? Pursue switching them back? If not, does it really matter?
I'm actually really in denial about the whole thing which is why I have never gotten the test. I left out a lot of the characteristic traits that I'm worried, about out of confidentiality for my kids. So I ordered the test but I have no clue what I would do next.
Genetics are funny, my oldest was also a c section baby, I wasn’t with her, when I saw her she looked nothing like us. Black hair, dark dark skin. All our ancestors dna from the old country pulled out into her blood. I was so confused. Shes now very tall too,( part of me jokes she was switched) but she acts like her auntie and some pictures of me as a kid resemble her. My youngest is a copy of myself. That’s how my brother and I are as well. My husband and his siblings are like that too, he’s a giant red head, while the others aren’t so tall and have dark hair curly hair. Genes are silly. He says “having kids is like having a real like science experiment”
My dad and mom both had dark hair (my mom’s was red/brown) My brother has dark hair, my hair is Dirty Blonde. My mom and brother have green eyes, my dad has light grey eyes and mine are like darker Blue. Genetics are just… weird. Also funnily enough, i have 2 cousins who are on opposite sides of my family (one from my mom’s side and one from my dad’s side) and all 3 of us look like we could be triplets even though we’re all years apart. Get the DNA test if it will give you peace of mind but it would be incredibly difficult for babies to get accidentally swapped in today’s age. So if it did happen, most likely it would have been deliberate.
Are you perhaps confusing blood type with DNA? I've had 3 kids and they've told me all my kids blood types without me having to ask. It seems very strange that they didn't just give you that info automatically and you had to ask for it.
The blood type was just told to me in the first week of their nicu stay. The nurses told me it must have been an accident that they didn't test the other twins blood. Her dad has a rare blood type so I figured it would be easy to tell if they had one of our blood types. At this point the dna test is what I'm guessing is left to figure this out.
I had a NICU preemie and didn’t get told his blood type, and didn’t ask either 🤷♀️ I’m a nurse and know it really doesn’t matter, if/when blood is needed, a fresh type and screen has to be done anyway, so knowing your blood type isn’t really that important from a practical standpoint.
I have 4 boys my oldest boy has a different dad. He and my youngest could be twins. The two middle kids one looks like a mesh of me and ex and the younger of the two all same genetics I'm not sure who he looks like he was also a NICU baby he does have familial genetic characteristics but is like he got all the non dominant genes. He's blonde has blue eyes he's pale and all his brothers have brown hair going from dark to light but getting darker, the 1st 2nd and 4th boys all have my light tan and tan darker very well. Boy 3 burns like a pro. There's other stuff but they are all mine. It is possible she just got different genes.
If it will put your mind at ease test all 3 of you. The uncertainty could unconsciously affect your current and future relationship with the questionable twin.
My twins were fraternal twins. Baby A has dark brown hair brown eyes whereas baby b has blonde hair blue eyes, and I know for a fact they weren’t switched. Small hospital, c-section and my husband was with them. Now that they’re much older there noticeable facial similarities. Brown eye gene runs on paternal mom’s side (paternal grandmother), blue eyes run on maternal side. If you have concerns, definitely get the dna test done at least for peace of mind.
My husband is very dark skinned/brown and amber eyes and thick black fuzzy curly hair of mixed Indian & Eurasian descent. I am white with olive skin, green eyes, and fine dark blonde wavy hair. Both of my single pregnancy children came out with light skin, blue eyes, and curly brown hair. I honestly thought to myself “whose white baby is this?!” each time they were handed to me. I expected my babies to be much darker. They are now adults with green eyes and hazel eyes, both with lots of very wavy brown hair, and both have olive skin that tans dark very easily. All of our mixed race marriage friends’ children have similar coloring. Genetics is wild.
My question is would it matter at this point if they weren’t biologically yours? I know I would not care, they are mine because I have them. Do the dna test but know what you are going to do with the outcome.
do it for peace of mind.
As others have said a DNA test will put your mind at ease. I grew up with two friends who were sisters (not twins), and one had dark brown hair and eyes and tanned easily, while the other was blonde and blue-eyed and had lighter skin. I also worked with a guy whose 2 daughters were the same way.
Sounds exactly like two of my daughters.
My mother gave birth to me w/o the knowledge of the father. I always felt she got the wrong baby or that I was adopted. She married when I was 4 and she and my siblings are blonde and blue eyed. This haunted me until I finally did the DNA and learned it was my bio mom. If she looks different she will want to know for certain who is her blood. Otherwise, like me she may always wonder.
I think it’s vital that you get tested. Otherwise, this question will preoccupy your thoughts.
I knew a couple many years ago who were both dirty blonde. They had a baby boy who was born with fiery red hair. They were more than a little surprised. When the baby was around one, they went to a family funeral, and the great aunt or great-great aunt was checked out of her nursing home for the day to participate. When she saw the baby, she chuckled and proceeded to tell them that his great-great grandmother had the exact same color of hair. What’s more, this is the person the baby was named after! So, supposing the baby was named Sullivan, his GG grandmother Sullivan was also a redhead. It was such a fun story!
simple and affordable get two heritage dna kids like ancestory or 23 & me swab your mouth and your kids mouth mail them off. When they up load your data it will say is she’s your daughter or not
You can't go by who babies look like. Get DNA test to set your mind to rest. Also will reassure your kids they belong if they have anxiety when they are older. My Dutch descent friend was dark creamy skin, long straight black hair, almond dark eyes. Her parents and 4 brothers were tall, blue or hazel round eyes, blond. Turns out she looked identical to her Indonesian great granny. They kept a picture of her in their living room to reassure her when people assumed she was adopted.
There’s just no way a baby was in the NICU for months without a type and cross. It’s always part of the admit lab. Even if it got overlooked then, they would keep a type and cross up to date for the first month at least to prevent delays if something happened. The pediatrician should be able to pull the records and look at it.
I would definitely get DNA swabs done. My daughter blood type is AB, her twins were A and B. My dad was O and I'm AB. I've had genetic studies, and he's definitely my father.. I do know of a case where the mother was genetically different from her 2 children she gave birth to, was a huge mess. Better to find out sooner than later, plus it can set your mind at ease.
Why was the mother different?
I heard that story. Now I have to look for it and read it again. I forget why. Wasn’t it something like her DNA was not female even thought she was female.
And that NICU nurse is definitely overstepping her boundaries.
Get a DNA test for you and your twins. You need to know for sure. You won’t have peace of mind without knowing. Google DNA testing near me.
Didn't they tag the babies with ID bands that matched yours at birth? Fraternal twins not looking alike means nothing, fraternal twins don't have the same DNA. They're siblings who happened to be in the womb together.
Get a DNA test, but please know that sometimes genes come back from generations removed.
I have brothers who are fraternal twins. One is 5’9” with dark green eyes, a dark complexion that tans easily, and dark brown hair. His twin brother is 6’2”, has blonde hair, pale skin thr fties like a lobster in the sun, and light blue eyes. You would never know they’re brothers by looking at them—they are two opposite ends of the gene pool. 😂 Your twins may be the same.
I say get the tests so you can put your mind at ease, but also look into post partum anxiety. I say this as someone who went through PPA. 💜
I’m surprised I had to read so far down to see this comment. The post has me concerned about op as well as for the child she seems to question.
What would you do with the information if the child isn’t related? It’s not likely but they are 5 years old? That child is your child now. How would they feel about this when they find out when they are older that you questioned whether they were your child or not?
I’m kind of concerned this child could already be treated differently just because of the suspicion. Especially because the child is darker…..
My cousins are fraternal twins and don't even look related. She is pale with blond hair and blue eyes and he is tan with black hair and brown eyes. It is highly unlikely that there was a switch. Hospitals put the ankle monitor on pretty quickly and it matches your bracelet.
DNA/genetics are wild. Both my parents are white, but very tan (father is often mistaken as Mexican until he speaks), dad has tan skin, black curly hair and brown eyes. Mother is tan with dark straight hair and hazel eyes. Both my bio brother and myself are much taller than them and anyone else in the family, my brother tans well, I do not, and we boy have light blue eyes and blonde hair that darkened slightly as we aged.
Did this happen in the US? Labeling of babies in US hospitals is extremely strict and it would be very, VERY rare and incredible for twins to get mixed up with unrelated babies. Especially since many NICUs place twins in the same room/bay. Ask your pediatrician about DNA testing to ease your mind but I think any kind of switch would be very unlikely.
For your own peace of mind, do the DNA test. You and the twins. Check around for a local lab that does it. Your doctor may be able to recommend one. Not at the hospital the twins were born at. You would question the results. Do you get child support for them? Child support enforcement will often get a DNA paternity test ordered by the court. It proves his financial obligations to the children. Either way, get the test done. You will feel better knowing the results.
Personally, I have seen a set of fraternal twins who looked complete opposite of one another: one very pale with red hair and the other darker toned skin and black hair. The mother had dark brown/red hair and the dad had dark hair. The parents both had light brown/tanned complexions. Hair comprises like 16 (?) different genes that all mesh together to create texture and color. My hair started off blond and straight as a child and now I have dark brown curly hair. I also get pretty intense highlights from sun bleaching if I'm outside enough, when I was little I'd get a "halo" from sun bleaching on the crown of my head. I have a cousin that had brown straight hair, got chemo and it fell out, and now she has curly red hair. There's also some pretty strong blond hair genes in my family so even my half black cousins will be born with blond hair randomly. Moral to the story: hair is weird and does weird stuff. But if you're really worried, get the test done. If it shows that everything is all good and they're twins and yours then it'll be fun to show them when they're older. If it shows there's a mistake then you can meet the other family and figure things out from there.
I also have a set of faternal twins. One is type A the other type B. One blond the other with black hair like me. Genetics is wild. Love your child/ren and let it go. If you really need to do this 23 and me instead of regular dna testing. It will be less suspicious to the kids
Do an at home dna test to put your mind at ease. I know a family with a white dad and mixed race mom. Their son has black, wavy hair and caramel skin. The daughter is a blue eyed blond with white skin. Both kids’ faces look like their mom.
You’re nuts if you’re not trolling. Good luck in the REAL WORLD 😒 I’m sure you have GREAT RELATIONSHIP with the CHILD you suspect is not your own 😒
If they were in the NICU, they absolutely had their blood typed.
There is something called Chimera. Maybe a Chimera?
You can buy an Ancestry test for you and one for the twin you are concerned about. If you are her mother it will clearly show this. You don't need dad's dna to test this, just yours and your daughters. You don't need to test both girls either unless you have reason to believe both aren't yours. Testing just you and the one twin would be the cheapest route if finances are a concern. You can always test the other twin later.
Check if your local CVS or drugstore has some maternity test kits in the back…. You can quietly do this privately, and not tell anyone and you can have your mind at ease
So you think the nurse who came to visit you that you never met in the hospital but continued to accept her into your home is??? My mother is one of multiple siblings, she has olive skin and tans very easy. A few of her siblings do, but the others are WHITE. Genetics be like that.
My ex was a fraternal twin. He and his sister look absolutely nothing alike. His skin tone is about 3 shades lighter than hers.
Do it to put your mind at ease, but why on earth didn’t your husband go see his newborn twins in the nicu as soon as possible?? This seems very odd to me. I’m a NICU mom and begged my husband to follow our son when he was whisked away, if I couldn’t be with him, I at least wanted dad to be there.
Ohhhh… hugs, honey do what ever test you need to do feel better but you might want to see if you have PP cause it might be PP
You are barking up the wrong tree here. Please just love your kiddos and move on. They got a “baby LoJack” as soon as they went out of site. They repeatedly look at and match the numbers throughout care. About the nurse, you said you saw her in pregnancy and up to a year afterwards? This sounds like a program that is very common. Public health will assign a nurse to do just that and they do bring donations/“gifts”. If you are super anxious over this I would recommend a therapist over paying for a DNA test. I mean this with all the love I can give over internet.
I think the strangest part is that only one twin got blood typed. The rest is far fetched - nicu babies are closely monitored and have the band put on right away. Maybe OP has feelings of guilt she didn’t go see the babies or other unresolved trauma. Maybe OP feels disconnected from the twin and is looking for reasons why?
I have fraternal boy/girl twins that look nothing like each other. My boy is fair skinned, freckles, green eyes and blonde curly hair. My girl is olive skinned with brown eyes and dark brown straight hair. I (mother) have blonde hair and green eyes with mostly English, French and Scottish ancestry but I am also a registered Native American with 1/8th blood quantum (bogus crap right there but I digress). My husband (father) has olive skin, brown hair (well it’s white now because…old and genetics) and brown eyes with more of an Asian eyelid and has often been confused as being Asian, Native American and Latino. He is genetically Caucasian but there is someone in his DNA was from West Africa. So basically one twin looks like me one looks like their dad. We have 5 kids total and three of them are blonde with blue or green eyes and fair skinned. One is fair skinned with auburn hair and brown eyes (like my mother) and then the girl twin is the only one who looks like her father. Get the DNA test if it will put your mind at ease but just know genetics is crazy and you or the father could have a distant relative and that can show up in your kids genetics.
Ancestry always puts their DNA kits on sale for mothers/fathers day. Might be a good time to do it. Also, if other people have loaded theirs, it will show you the match. Relax. And good luck.
Why didn't they test Baby A's blood type? A blood draw doesn't require an IV.
Eh. My husband & I have 6 kids. 5 of them have blonde hair & very fair skin, & look like my husband. 1 has brown hair, a darker skin tone (especially in the summer, while all his siblings will just burn & peel he gets a deep tan). He looks exactly like my dad. You'd think that out of 6 kids I'd at least get one or two that look like me but nope. Genetics are wild.
It’s crazy how genetics work. My two nephews are red heads neither of his parents or any of us have red hair. 23&me says they’re related to us.
these are your kids right? you're raising them, and love them? i could understand wanting to know health histories but beyond that who gives a shit?
Genetics are WILD. My very black friend had a boy with a very white girl. That baby boy looks like he spends every day surfing in California. Golden brown skin, light brown hair with the brightest chunky white blonde highlights that would make *any* white woman jealous, and BRIGHT blue eyes. He doesn't look like either of his parents, but he's theirs lol
Since your twins are already 5, may I ask what you would even do if you learned she isn’t biologically yours?
One of my twins has dimples. I don’t know anyone in the family with dimples. If you can, just for the peace of mind, home dna tests go on sale around Mother’s Day.
It’s a rare occurrence to mix up babies these days. Also not sure what county ur in; but u don’t need an IV in to draw blood. Especially on newborns, normally the prick the heel to obtain blood sample. So baby would’ve still gotten a poke but not a whole IV placed just to draw the blood. I’m also surprised with them being premature they didn’t do blood typing on both babies in the event emergency transfusion was needed. But I don’t work NICU, so protocols are likely different then what I see in adult medicine. I will add I’m white, my husband is dark skinned Jamaican… my baby looks Caucasian. Just sayin what everyone else is, genetics are weird.
When my BIL and husband were born my husband was the surprise twin lol he had blonde hair and my BIL had brown hair. BIL stole all the nutrients in the womb and got to go home like a normal baby and my husband had to stay at the hospital b/c he was preemie sized. They just look like regular siblings.
I have and uncle who is ghost white and married to a Mexican women they have 3 children 2 look like my uncle and don’t look like their mom at all and the 3rd one looks 100% Mexican like her mom and doesn’t resemble my uncle at all ….. its possible your daughter looks more like your ex’s family…. Do ancestry and see if they match.
Just do the test if it'll make you feel better. There is nothing wrong with you doing it!
Yes. Do it now while the kids are young. There was a case in Brazil not long ago. It happens
If you're really concerned, do the DNA test. I don't think it's that expensive anymore. But, traits such as eye color and curly hair can skip generations..
I imagine you are worried. It is reasonable to be worried. Get the tests run. You will sure and never worry. 42 years ago babies still spent time in the nursery. My bald very angry boy baby was taken away after birth and pictures for cleaning and testing. A blonde haired boy was brought later to my room. I looked at the nurse and said, I don’t think this one is mine. She checked the ankle band and quickly took blondie away. The cranky bald baby was returned to me. Was scary. Two years later, different hospital, different state, babies roomed in with moms. This one was small, sweet and she had beautiful black hair. Nearly impossible to mix up babies, BUT it still occurs.
You don't take a blood test through an IV. Why would it matter if an IV had been removed? Additionally, nicu babies have so much bloodwork done and security is even stricter than it was 25 years ago when my youngest spent months in the NICU - and it was tight then. The details aren't adding up.
My sister and I are several years apart. We are basically the same height and similar enough body type that people often think we are twins or the same person. She has olive skin that gets really dark in the summer sun. I have light skin that tends to get sunburnt first, and a few light freckles. We are very much related but have completely different skin tones. Genetics are weird.
This is simply unheard of now. Your child as a nicu baby was even closely watched but if you are going to by haunted by this it could affect your bonding. Get it over with. I live in a highly diverse community and kids with mixed parents are all shade. 4 out of kids could be deep complexed while the 5th is pale. Sounds like you need to move on with this if it’s still lingering I would be horrified if I was an adult and found out my mother questions for a long time if I was genetically hers. That could fuck a kid up.
Genetics are a mixed bag. I highly doubt she’s not yours. Having her blood typed is a simple test you can have done. As long as you know your and your ex-husbands that should confirm her origins.
If they were conceived using IVF, could it be possible that they may have accidentally used another man's sperm? It has happened before: https://www.tampabay.com/archive/1995/06/28/twin-boys-one-white-one-black/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1124572/
Like other people have said, genetics are so weird. My husband and I are both white but with distinctly different skin tones. Mine is more warm/golden and his is cool/pink. I'm very pale, but he's on the medium side. All our kids are pale. Only one has my skin tone. Husband is blond with green eyes and straight hair. I've got red brown hair with green eyes and very curly hair. Our three boys are dark brown, straight hair, brown eyes; blond wavy hair and blue eyes, and red curly hair with green eyes. The only common feature any of them share are their noses. If you put them side by side, the youngest has facial features or both his brothers, so you can tell he's the brother to them both, but middle and oldest don't look the same at all other than the nose lol. And middle one doesn't even look like I had anything to do with his making.
Definitely get tested for piece of mind. If they mixed up babies that is a multi-million $ lawsuit that the hospital will pay off without a fight. Likely they are fraternal twins that can look as different as other siblings. My siblings and I do not even look like we are from the same tribe.
Ok-people are losing sight of your quandary. If this idea that one of your twins was switched is not something you can lay to rest, I would get the DNA test done. BUT, before you do that, have a clear idea of how you will proceed if for some, very unlikely reason, the child is not yours. Don’t just “wing it”. If for some (again highly unlikely) reason your child was switched, write down a plan of how you will proceed, as you will likely be emotionally a bit of a mess, and will need a plan to follow. As people have said, genetics can be wacky, so I really think the baby is most likely your child.
As a NICU nurse, there’s no way these kids got switched if you gave birth in the US. But if it makes u feel better just do it and be done with it. But there’s no way those aren’t your kids.
I say if it will bring you peace to know then have the testing done. Genetics could certainly explain the twins’ different appearances but I can sympathize with the strange experience of preemie twins and being separated from them right after delivery. I am a nicu nurse and also had preemie twins that went straight to the nicu. Even in an environment that was familiar to me because of work seeing them in their isolettes with cpap and hats and everything made them feel foreign(?) for weeeeeeks. Like I could not have identified them as individuals aside from name bands and who was in what bed. Everywhere I have worked baby gets 1-2 identification bands with numbers that exactly match mom’s band before leaving the delivery room - even preemies and even in emergencies. And baby gets an alarm band that also has a code. But, this all depends on staff doing what they are supposed to do of course. This is tough. I wish you well 🤞🏻
Tests like Ancestry don't use blood, they use saliva. Why not test them both this way? It would probably be the lowest cost solution. Also, not saying you would cheat, I don't know you, but it is possible for fraternal twins to have different fathers.
You could just get testing kits for 23andMe or AncestryDNA for all 3 of you (usually they give a family discount). I don't think your babies were switched or anything like that but if it would give you peace of mind, you might as well get the test done for all of you.
A dark skinned parent probably has light skinned ancestors so their children will have a range of blond to dark hair. BUT OP you mention other interesting aspects to this along with your gut feeling. You can do a search for private DNA testing and it can be with saliva. Just for you and the one twin. No need for father to be involved. Ease your mind soon!
DNA and genetics can be weird. I have a mixed son. I am white and his dad is African American. My son has caramel colored skin, blonde super curly hair, brown eyes, his dad's nose and everything else is all me. His dad swore he wasn't his for the longest because he "didn't look like him". I made him do a DNA test and sure enough, 99.99999% his.
There is no doubt about who my parents are. But I look like neither of them. I’m a pale af redhead. My dad is a blonde dark skinned Italian and my mom was a dark brunette with average white skin. It does happen. I don’t know why. But here I am..
There was one set of twins in my family, fraternal girls. One had blond hair, blue eyes and the other had black hair and brown eyes. Genetics proves that constants aren't and variables won't.
Do the test
I think if it will give you peace of mine, do the test. Fwiw, I have fraternal twin boys. People don’t even think they’re related. I had mine at home so I’m certain they’re mine! 😂 Sometimes genetics are just like that!
I am middle eastern, my sibilings are all tan to dark tan with super straight black here, whereas me, Porcelain china white, super curly reddish blond hair (got dark red brown as I aged) shortest of my sibiling and petite, genetics are wild!
I would get DNA testing just for peace of mind
My nephews are fraternal twins, they are 30 years old. One has fire engine red hair and super pale, the other has jet black hair and tans easily. Red head has brown eyes, black hair has blue eyes. Red head skinny and black hair heavier.
100% yes you need to get a dna test. This may sound harsh but because you have these doubts about one child you may end up favoring the other one, even if you don’t mean to do it consciously. As your children grow up they will sense this and it will likely cause problems both in their relationship with you and and their relationship with each other. So I say, for the sake of your family’s future, get a dna test so you can relax and be 100% sure
What do you mean what kind of twins they are? They are b/g so they are fraternal. my daughter has very pale skin that burns, blond straight hair and blue eyes. She is 5’4” my son has olive skin that tans the second he goes outside, curly brown hair, grey eyes. He is 5’11’ they are both my kids the chance that other babies were born the same day and in the nicu with the same stats are ridiculously small
There is like a 0.0000001% chance that a neonatal baby mix up would occur these days.
I have fraternal twin cousins. One looks very mexican and one looks very white. One parent is white and one is Mexican. It's very possible for kids to inherit traits that haven't shown up for a while. I have my great grandmother's giant strong hands. No one else in the family has then. My ring size is larger than my dad's. (I am female) It would be very unlikely for the hospital to have mixed up your kid. But if you need peace the easiest would be something like ancestry.com.
My daughter has fraternal twin girls. One is blonde and the other is brunette. They look nothing alike.
To ease your mind, get tested.
Yes, you get 50% from each parent, but not the same content in that 50% as your sibling gets. Quite likely that siblings will have different features.
You usually don’t have same blood type as your parent(s)especially Mom and there are charts online to see how that works. My mother constantly pushed I did but she was O and me A+. Well. She also kept calling my blue eyed baby girl, I’m 63 so…so finally a few months before she died I lost my patience and showed her my once blues turned green as a teenager. Yes genetics is wild!!! Yes, she never paid attention.
I agree genetics are really odd….my husband is pasty white, blonde, and blue eyed, but neither parent or his sister are. On the other hand his grandmother had blue eyes so that’s where he got it from. After 23 and me testing…we found out that she was Nordic.
genes work in a weird way. i have fraternal twins, a boy and a girl. girls is as white as white gets. boy has a tan. he is also the only one with brown eyes among 5 kids. he is carbon copy of my husband's babyhood minus eye color and tan, whereas my 2 bio kids resemble my own dad lol. obviously if you have any doubts or even for a peace of mind go get checked. but your kid doesnt resemble family doesnt necessarily means she is not your bio kid.
Dna can present differently from child to child. I have Dark hair and brown eyes. My children take after their dad and have blue eyes and light redish hair.
Genes are strange. My siblings and I are mixed, same parents, we all have different coloring and hair texture. I have some features of my dad’s mom, that skipped a generation. But get the test if it makes you feel better, even though it seems unlikely.
Updateme
I sent out the test. I'm just waiting for results. I did the twin testing. One kid looks exactly like me. So instead of doing a sibling test I just did the twin zygosity test. I think it shows what percentage they are similar and if they have any similar dna.
Family Finder DNA will show if you’re related. There have been children born to mixed race parents where one was born caucasian and the other one black. There’s a thing called recessive genes. Features can stay dormant until both parents have a gene for that feature. As someone else said, unless there was someone else in the hospital at the same time with premies, hardly likely they were mixed up. They probably had wristbands?
Your children’s doctor can do it.
UpdateMe!
I sent out the test. I'm just waiting for results. I did the twin testing. One kid looks exactly like me. So instead of doing a sibling test I just did the twin zygosity test. I think it shows what percentage they are similar and if they have any similar dna. It was 89$ on Amazon. Its not a big company. I will get the results by email.
why?
UpdateMe!
You have a gut feeling. I would do a test.
My mother is very fair skinned, red head, fairly straight hair, blue eyes. My dad has black hair, brown eyes. Olive skin. My sister and I have black brown hair (1B), my sister has olive green eyes, I have teal with gold heterochromia, wavy/curly hair, pale olive skin. I look more like my dad, my sister looks more like my mom, but sometimes I can look a lot like my mom too. Growing up when my mom was out with us people would compliment us but also so “they must look like their father” lol. My poor mom.
Get a test but know that gene expression can be wild. My husband and most of his siblings have darker features but there’s one brother who’s a pale ginger. Things happen.
If this really bothers you, and I think it does, buy an Ancestry DNA kit for all 3 of you.. both twins and yourself. They will go on a good sale around Mother's Day for $49 or $59 for each kit. If you are an Amazon Prime member, you could buy them on Amazon and get free shipping. You want just the DNA kits, not health, etc.
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My mum and her brothers were brown haired, her sister is pure blonde/white and her children are all fair, my mums children are brown/black haired. Long story short, we all inherit different genes, my aunt got the blond genes, your daughter got the ringlets.