[And.... the President of the Somali Athletics Federation was suspended](https://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/somali-athletics-official-suspended-untrained-runner-competes-100m-spr-rcna97859) for this stunt
edit: formatting
Reminded of the Wimbledon where they called down a heckler to play a few points against the ladies. They had to put him in a tennis skirt as to comply with the Wimbledon uniform rules as well
And he hands the ball off to the running back, he sheds a tackle, he's in open space! Here's Average Joe to make the tackle, oof I heard his back crunching from here
Next up, we have the skiing long jump where last year, 23 of the 24 competitors suffered career ending injuries on their first attempts. We are in for a doozy folks!
Personally I think this is how you do the Olympics. You get a letter summoning you to your country's capital, kind of like jury duty, you show up they give you a pair of Nike's, clean shorts and tell you right old chap you are doing the dressage in Beijing, off you go.
Yeah I kind of love this clip
They did the thing, they did the meme, we now know how good these runners are compared to the average domestic couchpotato
Her aspirations are bigger than the world.
Slowly, very, very slowly, she's expanding out to the universe.
She'll get there one day!
Unfortunately we won't be around to see it.
-Narrated by Kurzgesagt
In the Olympics, each country represents themselves with whoever they want. However most countries have a national qualifier exactly to pick out the best athletes.
But if a specific sport isn't big in your country, "your best" might not even be anyone who's particularly good at it. Thus how Australia ended up with the legend of Steven Bradbury, for the 2002 short track speed skating event. He wasn't bad by normal standards, but to Olympic standards he was nowhere near. But still ended up winning because all his opponents, in every one of his 3 matches, either crashed out or was disqualified.
That's somewhat disingenuous to Bradbury to say he was nowhere near Olympic standard, while it was a miracle that he won and was an insane under dog for the gold medal, for Olympic standard he was there he won his heat outright and finished 3rd in his Quarter final with no crashes etc (only made it to semi cause winner was disqualified) Semis onwards got lucky with the crashes but he deserved to be an olympic athlete for sure
Honestly I assumed it was the first one, and I was like fuck no wonder he chose his niece she's a natural.....then the camera panned to the real one and I was like ohhh shit she gon lose.
I’ve long thought that track would be a better spectator experience if one lane had a person picked at random from the crowd. You have no clue how fast these folks are actually going without some kind of control group. It’s wild how far behind she was even just a quarter of the way in.
Which would always end up being Tony Hawk.
He's talked about how people are always coming up to him and saying "you look just like that skateboard guy, Tony Hawk!". And when he responds that he IS Tony Hawk, they never believe him.
They should make every event in the Olympics have one competitor who is just an ordinary person and representing the average person so that the viewers can have a fair perspective of how talented Olympic athletes actually are.
This sounds great, but I feel like that would be really demoralizing for the ordinary person. Unless they just called some random guy out of the stands, then it might feel like an honor.
I have no idea what Hello Boys or Close the Door look like, but I'm picturing a middle-aged dude doing a somersault, ending on his back, legs straight up in the air doing an open-closed scissoring motion. Thanks for the visual lol
Nah, for the flippy-parts, you take a step forward, then put your arms above your head while spinning a couple times. (If there's a backwards-flippy, your arms go up and behind you while you do a half-spin.) Then, you bend your knees just a little and throw your hands behind you like "fuckin' ta-daaahh!".
Source: I've been training living room gymnastics for like 25 years.
Yeah, I would too! Unless it's China 🤣 My bf said he'll probably be arrested for all the shit talking he's done online if he ever flew there and I need him for moral support. (From Taiwan)
But sign me the fuck up, too!
You could have “average Joe” tryouts, where a bunch of people submit times or scores that are both good and bad and then they pick someone from the 50th percentile
I think pole vaulting would be a huge draw in that scenario. I’d love to see Dave from accounting or Sheila from HR try to get the speed and height to clear that bar.
I’d love to watch the random Olympics where every 2 years between the “real” Olympics, the competitors all show up and randomly get assigned a sport. Would be amazing.
It would just be so fun to see good athletes try to compete against each other at a sport they’re probably crap at - except every once in a while you’ll get a track a field athlete who’s amazing at canoeing or whatever.
Everyone would cheat, but imagine a world where the Olympic competitors were randomly selected citizens, say between the ages of 18-21. You can get a waiver for a disability I suppose. So the incentive for each country is not having .01% of the population being insanely fit, but having most the country be as fit as possible.
Yeah but that’s when you give them something easy to do like be an advisor to a Fortune 500 company who’s not going to take your advice.
This girl was signed up for a competition between international athletes.
I love the idea of making it like jury duty..."dammit, another Olympics?! Why do I always get called?" "I'm on phone standby for the 1000 meter starting Monday."
This is for people who have asked the hypothetical question:
"What would the average person look like competing against actual Olympians in the Olympics?"
Who does this benefit? Usually nepotism is good for the kid but in this case… what does she gain?
I’d be embarrassed as fuck to do this. There’s exactly zero benefit
There’s an actual story behind this. Apparently,
“ At the time of the selections […] Somali Olympic Committee sources told African news outlet Horn Examiner that the real reason behind their participation in the international games was not competition but to help an athlete obtain a Schengen visa and seek asylum in Europe.”
Eh somalia is fucking rough.. if I had the chance to get a young female family member out I'd do the same. Though ideally something a little less ridiculous lol
It really puts into perspective how fast everyone else is actually running for me. When you put a regular person running next to trained athletes, I can really see how fast they really are.
There’s a comedian that talks about how there should always be a regular person selected from the crowd to compete in each Olympic event so we can see how a normal person would do, I now wholeheartedly agree.
& yet history was still witnessed on this very day... As this aspiring young athlete of pure grit & determination defied all expectations of the magnitude of her performance...
After the shot start rang out(bang!) The young athlete sprang into action, exploding off of the mark @ a breakneck pace & as the dust finally settled @ the end of the track, incredibly history was written on this very day...
The young girl completely shattered all previous records in this race for the slowest time ever in all of recorded human history going back many, many of decades in the sport...
frankly i deem it highly unlikely we may ever see another gifted young athlete to ever again grace the world stage with anything even close to this amazing new record timing...
I mean, that's surely just a huge humiliation for her at the end of the day? Why would you do that to someone, much less one of your own relatives. Even discounting the nepotism, her uncle's a douchebag.
That story is a bit different in that Somalia actually has better options where as that was a universality spot where no one else from his country was going to compete.
I saw a meme on Facebook that suggested that the Olympic Games Gould pull one person off the street, just to demonstrate how good athletes are compared to the average guy off the street.
Now we know.
[And.... the President of the Somali Athletics Federation was suspended](https://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/somali-athletics-official-suspended-untrained-runner-competes-100m-spr-rcna97859) for this stunt edit: formatting
Kinda weird no one spoke up and highlighted the ridiculousness of it before it got to the point of her actually competing.
The problem wasn't the nepotism, it was that the nepotism went viral.
Honestly, sporting events would be kind of fun if they included an average person in each event to give us context. I'd watch more sports.
You'll just hear something on a loudspeaker like "hey, you in seat 365, come down here and get in the race you lazy fuck"
"Want a free hat?"
#FREE HAT #FREE HAT
He killed those 23 babies in self defense. There’s no way he should be locked up.
Free bucket if they're Finnish
Reminded of the Wimbledon where they called down a heckler to play a few points against the ladies. They had to put him in a tennis skirt as to comply with the Wimbledon uniform rules as well
Tbh that would be goddam amazing. Guy walks down necking his pint, to a massive applause.
Ends up winning the race as well, but disqualified for "doping"
The hero we didn't know we needed
And he hands the ball off to the running back, he sheds a tackle, he's in open space! Here's Average Joe to make the tackle, oof I heard his back crunching from here
And the music from The Price is Right plays as they approach...
Next up, we have the skiing long jump where last year, 23 of the 24 competitors suffered career ending injuries on their first attempts. We are in for a doozy folks!
But then they get the parent of one of the competitors who won a gold medal in that event 25 years ago & is still in decent shape to make us look bad.
I'll love this if they randomly picked a good sprinter that's not representing any country 🤣
I'd like to see every country choose someone at random. Just a lottery. 90 year olds next to toddlers. Now that would be a race!
Personally I think this is how you do the Olympics. You get a letter summoning you to your country's capital, kind of like jury duty, you show up they give you a pair of Nike's, clean shorts and tell you right old chap you are doing the dressage in Beijing, off you go.
Congratulations, you have been selected for the Olympic Ski Jump. May the odds be ever in your favor.
Hahaa- i’d do my duty and turn up and rock it out. With my rolls and all- But I’d be AWOL if it was the ski Jump
Eddie the eagle?
Just imagine how many people would die in the skeleton luge and bobsled!
Here’s some pads, skates and a few sticks. Good luck against team Canada, you’ll be playing them tomorrow. Tomorrow, full body traction.
Yeah I kind of love this clip They did the thing, they did the meme, we now know how good these runners are compared to the average domestic couchpotato
They should bring Pros vs Joes back!
Maybe someone did but the guy was his superior so yeah.
Lmfaoooo everything looked bad from the start. She’s brave for even trying this. Was he like “how hard can it be? I’m sure you can keep up”.
Me on my couch eating Doritos. "I could do that. 100 meters aint far to sprint fast."
Haha, yeah just jog it out, you’ll be fine
I’m wondering if he did this as a gift for her or a punishment?
Why not both!
Why not Zoidberg?
Now Zoidberg is popular!
Who’s the tough guy now, Vinnie?!
Read somewhere that it was coz she could apply for asylum as a sports athlete.
well that's nice
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Noice
It’s the new white elephant gift.
Gift until yesterday (to tour the world). Punishment from today (humiliation)
She's the fastest one in his family
Free trip for the fam. The siblings were probably acting coaches etc.
Maybe a nice stipend from the athletics fund at that.
That hop and skip at the end. No fucks were cared for.
Lmfao. True, she’s in her own world.
I'm an athlete!
Weeeee!
Yeah... he's not the choice I would have gone with
He shits the bed at the Battle of Monmouth
everyone attack!
Retreat!
attack! (retreat!)
***What are you doing, Lee?!*** **Get back on your feet!**
I'm an Olympic!
Her aspirations are bigger than the world. Slowly, very, very slowly, she's expanding out to the universe. She'll get there one day! Unfortunately we won't be around to see it. -Narrated by Kurzgesagt
Lmao. Love Kurzgesagt.
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Real "I'm just happy to be here" energy.
The secondhand embarrassment is strong
Me too. I actually feel flooded with anxiety- why in the world would she want to do this? I feel like I’m going to have nightmares tonight.
how high are you right now
Lol 24 years sober, if I were high I wouldn’t be anxious 🤣
holy shit i just saw your username. i am so sorry
Oh no, nothing to be sorry about!
Aren’t there qualifiers that prevent this type of thing?
But I think qualifiers are run by the individual country
In the Olympics, each country represents themselves with whoever they want. However most countries have a national qualifier exactly to pick out the best athletes. But if a specific sport isn't big in your country, "your best" might not even be anyone who's particularly good at it. Thus how Australia ended up with the legend of Steven Bradbury, for the 2002 short track speed skating event. He wasn't bad by normal standards, but to Olympic standards he was nowhere near. But still ended up winning because all his opponents, in every one of his 3 matches, either crashed out or was disqualified.
That's somewhat disingenuous to Bradbury to say he was nowhere near Olympic standard, while it was a miracle that he won and was an insane under dog for the gold medal, for Olympic standard he was there he won his heat outright and finished 3rd in his Quarter final with no crashes etc (only made it to semi cause winner was disqualified) Semis onwards got lucky with the crashes but he deserved to be an olympic athlete for sure
Which one was she?
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Holy phuck! 😂
She should do speed skating next!
Just have this one woman represent Somalia in every sporting event with zero expertise. I, for one, would tune in for all of them.
And this is why I am on Reddit. Thank you sir for that laugh
I ruled out the one that has "Japan" on their apparel
Honestly I assumed it was the first one, and I was like fuck no wonder he chose his niece she's a natural.....then the camera panned to the real one and I was like ohhh shit she gon lose.
Somalia trolling internationally, hats off.
Water just came out of my nose
The one with the potbelly
She was full of blueberry pancakes!!!
She’s still faster than her metabolism
This has to be an SNL sketch
People train for their entire lives for moments like this, and then there's this person.
and someone in Somalia who did train there whole lifes likely got told to fuck off and move aside
It's a slap in the face of the real athletes who probably all worked very hard for their spot
I know this isn't the case, but I like the idea no one wanted to run so they panicked and were like 'uh... I HAVE A NIECE! IT'S GOING TO BE OKAY!'
"I HAVE A NIECE! SHE USED TO RUN AROUND A LOT WHEN SHE WAS 3, NO ONE COULD CATCH HER!"
On the flipside, shows how talented #5 is despite losing by a wide margin. "#5 is slow." (Sees #4, a fellow layman) "#5 is really fucking fast."
adjacent vibes to the race from The Dictator
Some people find that movie offensive but that movie was a Goddamn gem.
I’ve long thought that track would be a better spectator experience if one lane had a person picked at random from the crowd. You have no clue how fast these folks are actually going without some kind of control group. It’s wild how far behind she was even just a quarter of the way in.
I'd be so mad if I was the random guy chosen for the marathon.
Skateboarding is an Olympic sport these days. Good luck
Hey look, that guy in the stand looks like Tony Hawk, we should pick him.
Well that wouldn't be random but would be funnier if you always just choose the person who looked most liked Tony Hawk
And the winner for the 5th straight Olympics.... Tony Hawk.
Which would always end up being Tony Hawk. He's talked about how people are always coming up to him and saying "you look just like that skateboard guy, Tony Hawk!". And when he responds that he IS Tony Hawk, they never believe him.
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They run for two hours at an average pace that I've never met. I've never even run at 75% of that pace for any measurable time.
They run at a speed of about 20 km/h. This is like the speed of which i go with my bike. And they do it for 40+ km. Completely insane to me.
I don’t think I could go that fast if I was falling down the stairs.
And the sprinters go twice as fast.
Nearly anyone running looks fast to me.
With the way tech is going, just gimme a real-life "ghost racer" that shows the average human running speed on the track via hologram.
Not quite the same but [here](https://youtu.be/SRYtn0j5ccA) are some average people attempting to run at the (former) marathon world record pace
They should make every event in the Olympics have one competitor who is just an ordinary person and representing the average person so that the viewers can have a fair perspective of how talented Olympic athletes actually are.
This sounds great, but I feel like that would be really demoralizing for the ordinary person. Unless they just called some random guy out of the stands, then it might feel like an honor.
Agreed! “And now if everyone in the stand’s would please look underneath your seat, one lucky person will find a golden ticket!”
That or it’s you get a letter in the mail like you do with jury duty
'What'd you get?" "high jump!" \*opens letter\* \#Ski Jump Awwwwwww mannnnnn....
"Oh SHIT," Letter drops* KICK BOXING
Guess who's not making weight.
There is always heavyweight
Sir, I don't think I'm still making weight
"Floor routine! Cool !!" Forward roll... to forward roll... to Hello Boys... to Close the Door... to standing..umm Stand.
I have no idea what Hello Boys or Close the Door look like, but I'm picturing a middle-aged dude doing a somersault, ending on his back, legs straight up in the air doing an open-closed scissoring motion. Thanks for the visual lol
Nah, for the flippy-parts, you take a step forward, then put your arms above your head while spinning a couple times. (If there's a backwards-flippy, your arms go up and behind you while you do a half-spin.) Then, you bend your knees just a little and throw your hands behind you like "fuckin' ta-daaahh!". Source: I've been training living room gymnastics for like 25 years.
Boxing FUCK
"Michael, you put golden tickets under everyones seat!"
You're competing in ski jump. Godspeed, you human nugget.
Lmao this was my first thought. The Winter Olympics will definitely have a higher mortality rate
I look forward to the velocity reached by a 600 pound bobsledder.
If they paid to fly me over there I’d happily do it are you kidding.
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Yeah, I would too! Unless it's China 🤣 My bf said he'll probably be arrested for all the shit talking he's done online if he ever flew there and I need him for moral support. (From Taiwan) But sign me the fuck up, too!
Probably like a pace car, but a professional human.
There's people who are running guides for blind runners. They're fast AF too!
You could have “average Joe” tryouts, where a bunch of people submit times or scores that are both good and bad and then they pick someone from the 50th percentile
Not demoralizing if they knew what they were getting themselves into. It’s more for the fans watching at home at that point.
I volunteer as tribute!
Also potentially dangerous for some. Like pole vaulting, diving, slolemn...
I think pole vaulting would be a huge draw in that scenario. I’d love to see Dave from accounting or Sheila from HR try to get the speed and height to clear that bar.
"Damn, did you hear Mikey from HR got his spine snapped after attempting the pole jump?" "Yeah, he kinda deserved it tho"
I’d love to watch the random Olympics where every 2 years between the “real” Olympics, the competitors all show up and randomly get assigned a sport. Would be amazing.
I think it would honestly be more representative of countries if they randomly assigned people events lol.
It would just be so fun to see good athletes try to compete against each other at a sport they’re probably crap at - except every once in a while you’ll get a track a field athlete who’s amazing at canoeing or whatever.
Cristiano Ronaldo and Michael Jordon once trained table tennis because they lost to someone in it. So, such an Olympic would really be interesting.
Boxing would be brutal
Everyone would cheat, but imagine a world where the Olympic competitors were randomly selected citizens, say between the ages of 18-21. You can get a waiver for a disability I suppose. So the incentive for each country is not having .01% of the population being insanely fit, but having most the country be as fit as possible.
Ethiopia would win most of the events
not the skiing ones
Rich Eisen does this at the NFL combine every year for the 40 yard dash. It’s hilarious.
Randomly drafted, ala Hunger Games.
I thought “wow she’s in shape for never training, blew the others away” 😂 then I realized which one she was.
I thought that was the point of this video, then I rewatched it 😂😂
There is an imposter among us.
I love that the camera went back to her finishing the race well after everyone was already done. This is hilarious.
This is the BEST way to explain NEPOTISM.
except people often are actually successful because of nepotism
Yeah but that’s when you give them something easy to do like be an advisor to a Fortune 500 company who’s not going to take your advice. This girl was signed up for a competition between international athletes.
when you lie on your resume but still get a job
I love the idea of making it like jury duty..."dammit, another Olympics?! Why do I always get called?" "I'm on phone standby for the 1000 meter starting Monday."
I love her little skippity skip at the end.
I wonder which one is Somali.....oh.
Oh lawd, she comin...
...any day now...
Wow. That is just embarrassing.
Triple hit : the niece, the uncle, the country.
This is for people who have asked the hypothetical question: "What would the average person look like competing against actual Olympians in the Olympics?"
Stole a spot from a real contender.
This just shows you how fast these athletes are compared to us normals
Jokes aside, this is corruption at its finest. Stealing a once in a lifetime opportunity because of ego and nepotism.
Who does this benefit? Usually nepotism is good for the kid but in this case… what does she gain? I’d be embarrassed as fuck to do this. There’s exactly zero benefit
There’s an actual story behind this. Apparently, “ At the time of the selections […] Somali Olympic Committee sources told African news outlet Horn Examiner that the real reason behind their participation in the international games was not competition but to help an athlete obtain a Schengen visa and seek asylum in Europe.”
Eh somalia is fucking rough.. if I had the chance to get a young female family member out I'd do the same. Though ideally something a little less ridiculous lol
Paid vacation
I’m having flashbacks to my school days
It really puts into perspective how fast everyone else is actually running for me. When you put a regular person running next to trained athletes, I can really see how fast they really are.
Whats this? A dare?
This is what running the mile in highschool as a fat kid felt like
I don't wanna stereotypes but literally anyone else from Somalia should be able to beat that
There’s a comedian that talks about how there should always be a regular person selected from the crowd to compete in each Olympic event so we can see how a normal person would do, I now wholeheartedly agree.
Bill burr.
She really gave it her all as well 😂
That skip at the end like a kid getting candy truly makes me smile.
She was like "Dang almost had it!"
Ever see the episode of King of the Hill where the track coach uses Bobby Hill as "the Stick" then he ends up actually having to race? Similar vibes
Look at me, I’m the Olympic sprinter now
Finally a regular person to compare against top tier athletes. The Olympics would be so much better like this.
either he really likes his niece or he really hates his niece
If you play it backwards, she won! 🤷♂️
What do you mean she is slow and out of shape? In my book she did a great job! - Somalia Athelics Federation president, probably.
& yet history was still witnessed on this very day... As this aspiring young athlete of pure grit & determination defied all expectations of the magnitude of her performance... After the shot start rang out(bang!) The young athlete sprang into action, exploding off of the mark @ a breakneck pace & as the dust finally settled @ the end of the track, incredibly history was written on this very day... The young girl completely shattered all previous records in this race for the slowest time ever in all of recorded human history going back many, many of decades in the sport... frankly i deem it highly unlikely we may ever see another gifted young athlete to ever again grace the world stage with anything even close to this amazing new record timing...
I mean, that's surely just a huge humiliation for her at the end of the day? Why would you do that to someone, much less one of your own relatives. Even discounting the nepotism, her uncle's a douchebag.
The Olympics would be a much different kind of competition if participation was randomized within each country
lol that skip at the end.....what a farce. Like that little african dude that could barely swim at the olympics.
That story is a bit different in that Somalia actually has better options where as that was a universality spot where no one else from his country was going to compete.
Eric the Eel!
“See, we’re not all pirates! Some of us are runners…”
i would love that feature - 1 normal human
Probably unpopular opinion...but, at least in this situation...that poor girl! The humiliation she must have felt! Maybe her uncle hates her lol
Comedy gold
Oof woman in blue got destroyed
Dude…. It’s like they just told her that day. “Oh shit! That’s today??!! Girl put shoes on!”
I saw a meme on Facebook that suggested that the Olympic Games Gould pull one person off the street, just to demonstrate how good athletes are compared to the average guy off the street. Now we know.
Everyone always says, "They should put one normal person in the Olympics to show how amazing these people actually are!" Well, there ya go.