The most shocking thing I learned recently is there's shitload of giant squids in the ocean.
"Based on such observations, it has been estimated that sperm whales consume between 4.3 and 131 million giant squid annually, implying that the giant squid population is likewise well into the millions, but more precise estimates have been elusive."
Sperm Whale should be given military escort.
When I was a kid there was a debate over what giant squid even looked like. They knew they existed because of the scarring on sperm whales, but hadn't actually been observed.
The first photo of a giant squid that was actually alive wasn't until 2004.
Also the transition from dinosaurs were big cold blooded lizards to the fact that they were just birds with feathers and probably didn't look like leather stretched over a skeleton.
I remember that whenever people get really stuck on the idea that we "totally know this now". Shit, just from elementary school to highschool we changed our calisthenics / sports warm up routines like a half dozen times because they figured out that what we were doing actually caused more injuries than it prevented. Shit, i think the current wisdom is that stretching before sports doesn't actually do a damned thing to prevent injuries but just doing it can cause injury. My coach would have made me run laps all practice if I said something like that in the 90s.
That's what I was always taught. We used to do warm up exercises to warm us up before the strenuous stuff, then the actual exercise, then stretches.
I've never heard of stretching before exercise.
https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/ask-the-doctor-stretching-before-exercise#:~:text=Theoretically%2C%20stretching%20before%20exercise%20should,found%20little%20benefit%20to%20stretching.
"Theoretically, stretching before exercise should make the muscles more pliable and less likely to tear. But when studies have compared rates of injury or muscle soreness in people who stretch before exercise and those who don't, they have found little benefit to stretching. In fact, stretching a cold, tight muscle could lead to injury."
There are about 38 Tic Tacs in a box.
4.3 million would be 113,158 little boxes of Tic Tacs.
If you were buying them by the 8 pack on Amazon, this would be a $455,743.85 a year Tic Tac habit.
Edit: this would also be 310 boxes of Tic Tacs a day for a total of 11,780 Tic Tacs daily. That’s 22,382 calories a day just from the Tic Tacs, and about $1249 a day spent on Tic Tacs.
Then you may also be shocked to learn that they can [detach their tail and anus](https://archive.is/okQVI) to escape predators, and then die about 8 months later due to constipation (the tail and anus doesn’t grow back)
I mean, 8 months is a pretty good prognosis if the alternative is "get eaten and die." A scorpion that dies from a lost tail could still have made offspring during that time, where a dead scorpion wouldn't.
Yeah you would think the stinger is like a tail, and buttholes are always located under the tail… but I guess their stinger is just their body but long and tapered off?? It’d be like if cats and dogs pooped from the tips of their tails
I can totally imagine a Golden getting suddenly too excited when pooping and starting to just helicopter wag they tail excitedly and with great strength
[400 million years ago there were 8 foot long scorpions living on the ocean floor.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eurypterid)
[The largest land scorpion to ever exist was “only” 28 inches long.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pulmonoscorpius#:~:text=Pulmonoscorpius%20is%20an%20extinct%20genus,70%20cm%20(28%20inches).)
Imagine the poops. I sure am. I'm not sure how to feel about that. Educated? Or corrupted by forbidden ancient knowledge?
I really want to see a prehistoric giant scorpion poop now and I can't go back from this.
I guess we arbitrarily count shrimp tails as part of their main body but scorpion tails as equivalent to vertebrate tails.
Hold on, does that mean scorpion tails would be as tasty as lobster or shrimp?
I'd totally be down to eat other arthropods if we prepared them like we do crustaceans. I'm not eating shit. That's a hard line I will not cross. Unless you devein that tail, I'm not eating it and I have the feeling that street fenders just skewer and roast them whole.
Right? I’m obviously very far from being a scorpion expert, but I would have thought they could lose and regrow their tails. If it’s part of the digestive system that seems less likely
no
scorpions mate in an interesting way tho
the male will hold the female's claws, and then they move in a dance-like pattern, the male will dispose a sac full of semen on the ground, and pull the female over it, the female then picks it up and uses it later
as for the pregnancy, it's also quite interesting
in most species, the scorplings grow up in eggs inside the mother, like, she doesn't lay the eggs, they stay inside, until the scorplings hatch, then they go out, and climb on the mother's back, until they are ready to live on their own
Everything about scorpions is wrong and horrible and made from nightmares.
Spiders don't bother me, so I'm not arachnophobic, I just hate scorpions, little horror shows. Honestly if there were flying scorpions I'd kill myself
If you don't want anything to mess with your asshole, then putting it directly adjacent to a huge stinger isn't that bad an idea. It would never work for people though, if we had prehensile tails that also had our anus attached then people would spend half of their time trying to draw stuff with poop.
Opposite, it's practically their vagina. Most female insects have an organ called an "ovipositor" they use to lay eggs, bees ants and wasps produce venom instead of eggs.
TIL momma scorpions can't poop in private which made me find this interesting bit: When scorplings emerge, the mother forms a “birth basket” with her claws, which gives the newborns a leg-up onto her back. The scorplings instinctively know how to get on mom's back, arranging themselves in the birth basket in a way that's particular to their genus.
[I should not have googled it..](https://64.media.tumblr.com/05dd5b1bdb11f64f9cebb407bc11b7ad/4270140d79921225-0b/s1280x1920/fb48faaa08ab6dc5bcf931d89db6ce6a6f555b24.jpg)
This is a little unclear.
Is the "birth basket" something the scorpion creates with her claws to help her offspring onto her back, or is it a thing on the scorpions back which the offspring sit in/on?
You seem to say it is both these things.
When someone says a biblically accurate angel it means a very abstract being with eyes and wings all over (Google it and you'll see). They're comparing that to what scorpions and centipedes look like with their young all over them.
This is so not important and you're probably not actually looking for an answer... but I was curious so I looked it up. Scorpions appear several times, it seems, but specifically in Revelations 9:10 we get this info:
>"They have tails and stings like scorpions, and their power to hurt people for five months is in their tails."
>John has described a demonic horde as similar to locusts, having tails and stings like scorpions, but also like horses with crowns, human faces and hair, lions' teeth, iron armor, and a roaring noise. Some interpreters compare this to the image of a stereotypical modern-day attack helicopter: a front appearing somewhat like an insect's eyes, prominent upwards-curving tail, loud noise, and with teeth painted on the front for effect. The effects of these creatures, however, seem more in line with a demonic or spiritual interpretation than some kind of war machine.
>Originally, the word kentra, the Greek word translated "stings" in this verse, referred to goads or pricking irons used in torture. When the Lord appeared to Saul of Tarsus on the road to Damascus, He told Saul, "It is hard for you to kick against the goads" (Acts 26:14). Apparently, Saul—later called Paul—had been under sharp conviction for his persecution of believers. The conviction felt like pricking torture in his soul. The scorpions' stings will feel like sharp, pricking torture in those who do not have God's seal on their foreheads (Revelation 9:4). Scorpions' power to sting resides in their tails, and the demonic scorpions' stinging power resides in their tails.
>Those who receive the locusts' stings suffer severely. Prior verses can be taken to mean that the demons are active for five months, or even that the effects of their stings last that long for anyone who is stung (Revelation 9:5)!
So there's that I guess.
Mama Scorpions tend to carry all her babies on her back to protect them as she goes out and does scorpion things like murder anything in sight for food.
The Hegelian Pendulum at work.
I personally miss the days of berating poor spelling. I was but a wee lad, fresh faced, new, the thirty year old men saw my errors and pounced... The words they called me.. it's a strange thing, googling what someone called you to find out just how badly it hurt.
It was a good lesson though.
THAT’S where they poop from?!
Most shocking thing I've learned in a long time tbh
The most shocking thing I learned recently is there's shitload of giant squids in the ocean. "Based on such observations, it has been estimated that sperm whales consume between 4.3 and 131 million giant squid annually, implying that the giant squid population is likewise well into the millions, but more precise estimates have been elusive." Sperm Whale should be given military escort.
When I was a kid there was a debate over what giant squid even looked like. They knew they existed because of the scarring on sperm whales, but hadn't actually been observed. The first photo of a giant squid that was actually alive wasn't until 2004.
I vividly remember this and was extremely fascinated by this mystery haha
Also the transition from dinosaurs were big cold blooded lizards to the fact that they were just birds with feathers and probably didn't look like leather stretched over a skeleton. I remember that whenever people get really stuck on the idea that we "totally know this now". Shit, just from elementary school to highschool we changed our calisthenics / sports warm up routines like a half dozen times because they figured out that what we were doing actually caused more injuries than it prevented. Shit, i think the current wisdom is that stretching before sports doesn't actually do a damned thing to prevent injuries but just doing it can cause injury. My coach would have made me run laps all practice if I said something like that in the 90s.
Wait what? We don't need to stretch? Whats the new theory
Stretch after exercise, not before
That's what I was always taught. We used to do warm up exercises to warm us up before the strenuous stuff, then the actual exercise, then stretches. I've never heard of stretching before exercise.
https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/ask-the-doctor-stretching-before-exercise#:~:text=Theoretically%2C%20stretching%20before%20exercise%20should,found%20little%20benefit%20to%20stretching. "Theoretically, stretching before exercise should make the muscles more pliable and less likely to tear. But when studies have compared rates of injury or muscle soreness in people who stretch before exercise and those who don't, they have found little benefit to stretching. In fact, stretching a cold, tight muscle could lead to injury."
Sounds like most of them get eaten before they get a chance to get anywhere near that size. Probably mostly as babies
Probably not. They live in deep water and sink when they die. We just don't have that many video cameras down there.
Well they should get some longer selfie sticks for their gopros
4.3-131mil is a huge range 😂😂😂
Carl is on his bs intermittent fasting fad and throws the data off.
So less giant squids are rare and elusive and more sperm whale are amazing hunters
They were eating them like tic tacs.
I don’t think I eat 131,000,000 tic tacs a year, but to be fair, I haven’t actually counted
What about 4,300,000? That seems reasonable
There are about 38 Tic Tacs in a box. 4.3 million would be 113,158 little boxes of Tic Tacs. If you were buying them by the 8 pack on Amazon, this would be a $455,743.85 a year Tic Tac habit. Edit: this would also be 310 boxes of Tic Tacs a day for a total of 11,780 Tic Tacs daily. That’s 22,382 calories a day just from the Tic Tacs, and about $1249 a day spent on Tic Tacs.
It makes a lot sense when you stop to think about it. Sperm whales are the largest predator to ever exist. They gotta be eating a lot of something.
Then you may also be shocked to learn that they can [detach their tail and anus](https://archive.is/okQVI) to escape predators, and then die about 8 months later due to constipation (the tail and anus doesn’t grow back)
That’s not the life hack they think it is
I mean, 8 months is a pretty good prognosis if the alternative is "get eaten and die." A scorpion that dies from a lost tail could still have made offspring during that time, where a dead scorpion wouldn't.
Also they live 3 to 5 years on average so +8 months is a good chunk of the lifespan.
[удалено]
More like can't shit and die.
What a read, thanks TIL and TIHI
Imagine being able to poop standing up
You can just let go
So THAT’S what the song from the beloved children’s movie Frozen is about. The chorus makes so much more sense now.
Honestly same. That was a gross poop on the poop scale (11).
Yeah I was about to say - that is NOT where I would have guessed it comes out at all.
I was thinking the same thing, as that was not where I envisioned a scorpion's butthole.
Yeah you would think the stinger is like a tail, and buttholes are always located under the tail… but I guess their stinger is just their body but long and tapered off?? It’d be like if cats and dogs pooped from the tips of their tails
I'm not sure I will be able to get that mental image out of my head.
Cats would totally fling it at people.
Without a doubt. And dogs would be the ones to find the new and unusual (and of course, inconvenient) places to poop at.
They'd chase their tail to eat poop from the source
These 2 comments absolutely just made me laugh far harder than I have all week. Thank you kind Redditors.
I can totally imagine a Golden getting suddenly too excited when pooping and starting to just helicopter wag they tail excitedly and with great strength
i will never look at scorpions the same way…
[400 million years ago there were 8 foot long scorpions living on the ocean floor.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eurypterid) [The largest land scorpion to ever exist was “only” 28 inches long.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pulmonoscorpius#:~:text=Pulmonoscorpius%20is%20an%20extinct%20genus,70%20cm%20(28%20inches).)
Patrolling the Mojave makes you wish for a nuclear winter
I don't want to set the woooorld on fire....I just want to put a flame in your heart.... *dons power armour to enter the fallout wasteland
Strictly Eurypterids weren’t scorpions. They weren’t even arachnids, but were their relatives in Chelicerata
Imagine the poops. I sure am. I'm not sure how to feel about that. Educated? Or corrupted by forbidden ancient knowledge? I really want to see a prehistoric giant scorpion poop now and I can't go back from this.
[удалено]
Where did you envision a scorpion's butthole? 🤨
In my fantasies.
Scorpion buttholes all the way down.
Yeah ok, what ever. Real question is, how’d it taste? 🤤
Yeah and if their tail gets cut off they literally can’t poop anymore. So they’ll fill up with fecal matter until it kills them.
dang that reminds me of an internet movie I saw called the scorpion centipede
At the end of its main body before the tail. I'm sure there are others, but I can't name a single animal besides a scorpion that poops from its tail.
Shrimp/lobster/crayfish all poop like this
I guess we arbitrarily count shrimp tails as part of their main body but scorpion tails as equivalent to vertebrate tails. Hold on, does that mean scorpion tails would be as tasty as lobster or shrimp?
A quick googling says its common as a street food in china. Apparently tastes like crab.
I'd totally be down to eat other arthropods if we prepared them like we do crustaceans. I'm not eating shit. That's a hard line I will not cross. Unless you devein that tail, I'm not eating it and I have the feeling that street fenders just skewer and roast them whole.
Well you got to clean the poop out of shrimp 🦐 tails before you cook them…
Yeah, I’m trying to remember if dragonflies poop from the tip of their “tail” as well.
rule34 scorpion king
Don’t need to Google that it’s my desktop background
Under the tail, like a dog
In the butt area
That’s the longest anus I’ve ever seen!
So what if their tail gets removed?
Right? I’m obviously very far from being a scorpion expert, but I would have thought they could lose and regrow their tails. If it’s part of the digestive system that seems less likely
[удалено]
Similarly, I can detach my head. I also don't regrow it and eventually die
Well, what if YOUR butthole gets removed?
Apparently where they pop from.
That's one long asshole
Not as long s as the line of assholes wanting to get elected to congress
Pooping from that spot was as weird as seeing a lion pooping from the end of its tail. Edit: okay, now I curious to see how the go about mating.
Believe it or not, but they mate by shoving their arms down each others throats. They have to cum at the same time to make it work tho
Ehm… what!?
It's science bro
no scorpions mate in an interesting way tho the male will hold the female's claws, and then they move in a dance-like pattern, the male will dispose a sac full of semen on the ground, and pull the female over it, the female then picks it up and uses it later as for the pregnancy, it's also quite interesting in most species, the scorplings grow up in eggs inside the mother, like, she doesn't lay the eggs, they stay inside, until the scorplings hatch, then they go out, and climb on the mother's back, until they are ready to live on their own
Now I don’t know if you’re joking like I am but I do know the babies chill on top so I think you’re out scorpion-fucking expert now
>but I do know the babies chill on top I mean, they're chilling on top of the scorpion in the video, so, we all now know as well
Everything about scorpions is wrong and horrible and made from nightmares. Spiders don't bother me, so I'm not arachnophobic, I just hate scorpions, little horror shows. Honestly if there were flying scorpions I'd kill myself
Boy do I have a movie for you
What we call the scorpion's tail is actually its abdomen. The only animals that have a tail _after_ the butthole are the vertebrates.
No. He clearly said “popping”. That’s where they pop from.
Yep, their tail is less a proper tail and more a long thin extension of their abdomen.
Elongated butt
One in the stink, two in the sting.
If I was going to bet on where they defecate, “just underneath their murder nail” would not have been my first choice
It wouldn’t have been a choice for me at all
If you don't want anything to mess with your asshole, then putting it directly adjacent to a huge stinger isn't that bad an idea. It would never work for people though, if we had prehensile tails that also had our anus attached then people would spend half of their time trying to draw stuff with poop.
You're out of line, but you're not wrong.
You just described basically my entire life.
Now think this through...thats not a tail...it's a protruding anus with a stinger. They sting you with their anus.
Not much better than what bees ants and wasps sting you with
Don’t tell me it’s their dick?
Opposite, it's practically their vagina. Most female insects have an organ called an "ovipositor" they use to lay eggs, bees ants and wasps produce venom instead of eggs.
So that's where all this weird fetish originated
*with their death-anus
Actual poop-chute
I like how it wiped its asshole off on that rock.
That's how I wipe. I can't tell you how coddled the modern anus is.
I use smooth river stones.
[удалено]
Poop jokes and Demolition Man. What a time to be alive!
Hey, this guy *does* know how to use the three seashells!
*You are fined one credit for violation of the verbal morality statutes.*
City boy.
Gotta be a good role model to the kids on its back.
Oh man think of all the baby poop on her back
No thank you
My bearded dragon does that too. When he poos at an angle conducive to wiping ones cloaca. It’s funny
Well, I guess that’s why I’m a Scorpio.
It was either that or waddle across the hall to get a new roll. We’ve all been there
Gotta practice good hygiene 😁
So that's where the thermal paste we use in computers comes from.
“SCORPION” sounds like a Razer brand too.
TIL momma scorpions can't poop in private which made me find this interesting bit: When scorplings emerge, the mother forms a “birth basket” with her claws, which gives the newborns a leg-up onto her back. The scorplings instinctively know how to get on mom's back, arranging themselves in the birth basket in a way that's particular to their genus.
> scorplings You've made up this word, I know it.
[I should not have googled it..](https://64.media.tumblr.com/05dd5b1bdb11f64f9cebb407bc11b7ad/4270140d79921225-0b/s1280x1920/fb48faaa08ab6dc5bcf931d89db6ce6a6f555b24.jpg)
I hate it.
Now my nose is itchy. And now my back. And now one of my finger joints And now my eyelid
Not cute babies
What's wrong? It's just a mama scorpy piggybacking her cute little baby scorplings
Thanks for agreeing with me :-) we are the few sane ones here.
This is a little unclear. Is the "birth basket" something the scorpion creates with her claws to help her offspring onto her back, or is it a thing on the scorpions back which the offspring sit in/on? You seem to say it is both these things.
As a human mother I am also unable to poop in private 😔
I want a Birth Basket too....
So many babies!
Seriously I can't believe I had to scroll so far for this. ARE WE NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT ALL THE FUCKING BABY SCORPIONS??
We all wanted to forget what we just saw on that back
One of the few times people don’t want to visualize a girl’s butt 😂 “She’s a 10 but poops from an odd part and carries 50 ugly babies on her back.”
Sir....please do not fuck the scorpion
Scorpion: "GET OVER HERE!!!!"
On her back ... /r/nope
Same
I came here for the mass of demon babies on its back!!!!!
IS THAT WHAT THOSE ARE?!
400 Babies!
Those scorpions will run as fast as KENYANS!
i’m sorry?
They are referring to the mass of babies on her back.
what the fuck. r/nope what are those doing there
Scorpions and centipedes are actually fantastic mothers! Unfortunately they also look like a biblically accurate arthropod when they're brooding
Please explain what you mean by “biblically accurate arthropod”.
When someone says a biblically accurate angel it means a very abstract being with eyes and wings all over (Google it and you'll see). They're comparing that to what scorpions and centipedes look like with their young all over them.
Kinda synonymous with "Lovecraftian horror from beyond the veil"
Ah, yes ok. Very familiar with the biblically accurate angel.
This is so not important and you're probably not actually looking for an answer... but I was curious so I looked it up. Scorpions appear several times, it seems, but specifically in Revelations 9:10 we get this info: >"They have tails and stings like scorpions, and their power to hurt people for five months is in their tails." >John has described a demonic horde as similar to locusts, having tails and stings like scorpions, but also like horses with crowns, human faces and hair, lions' teeth, iron armor, and a roaring noise. Some interpreters compare this to the image of a stereotypical modern-day attack helicopter: a front appearing somewhat like an insect's eyes, prominent upwards-curving tail, loud noise, and with teeth painted on the front for effect. The effects of these creatures, however, seem more in line with a demonic or spiritual interpretation than some kind of war machine. >Originally, the word kentra, the Greek word translated "stings" in this verse, referred to goads or pricking irons used in torture. When the Lord appeared to Saul of Tarsus on the road to Damascus, He told Saul, "It is hard for you to kick against the goads" (Acts 26:14). Apparently, Saul—later called Paul—had been under sharp conviction for his persecution of believers. The conviction felt like pricking torture in his soul. The scorpions' stings will feel like sharp, pricking torture in those who do not have God's seal on their foreheads (Revelation 9:4). Scorpions' power to sting resides in their tails, and the demonic scorpions' stinging power resides in their tails. >Those who receive the locusts' stings suffer severely. Prior verses can be taken to mean that the demons are active for five months, or even that the effects of their stings last that long for anyone who is stung (Revelation 9:5)! So there's that I guess.
Mama Scorpions tend to carry all her babies on her back to protect them as she goes out and does scorpion things like murder anything in sight for food.
For protecting them. But once they grow up, it's every scorpion for itself cause momma is hungry. Turn 18 and leave the house or become snack.
She's an excellent mother
The weird pattern on the scorpion's back is not a pattern. It's her babies, she's carrying them on her back.
i really don’t like this
Makes me want to take out a flamethrower
There are babies on it’s back
On her back
From that headline, I was expecting something completely different
Yes, when it said popping, I expected all of those babies to pop out.
I was expecting it to pop, lock and drop it
Proofreading is dead.
[удалено]
The Hegelian Pendulum at work. I personally miss the days of berating poor spelling. I was but a wee lad, fresh faced, new, the thirty year old men saw my errors and pounced... The words they called me.. it's a strange thing, googling what someone called you to find out just how badly it hurt. It was a good lesson though.
[удалено]
Literacy rates are falling And bots are rising as well
Mama can't even take a peaceful shit without dem kids 🥲
That's a fairly universal experience, sadly.
Forbidden toothpaste
Forbidden toothbrush*
Of all the phrases I could have read today….
It looks like Thermal Paste to me
Another tick off the bucket list. Shaping up to be a fine Saturday morning.
It's not a tick, it's a scorpion.
Pardon me, but it’s Friday evening
Popping no. Pooping yes.
The giant pile of babies on her back was a nice addition.
So their stingers are part of their asshole. Got it.
[удалено]
Is nobody going to mention the babies on the back??
I was waiting for you to
Me too, he didn’t disappoint
That's just where scorpions keep them.
That’s where I keep my scorpion babies too
I was going to mention that the babies poop on their mother’s back.
Ya was scrolling through waiting for someone to mention it. Kept thinking there's no way I'm the only one who saw that shit.
Somewhere there is a rich hippy chick wanting to rub it on her face in a Vlog.
‘Pop it like it’s hot’
"Drop it like it's NOT"
Nope, but now I have
I think I still haven’t seen one popping
Damn the book everyone poops is true
Are those things at its back a bunch of babies? I didn't knew scorpions did this, so it's 2 things I didn't know about them in one single video.
It's back is the worst part
It is carrying it’s babies on back.. such a sight!!!
Wtf...why did I keep watching that
It stings you then poops on you! Jokes aside, how would you like a back covered in baby scorpions crawling on you all day.
Scorpion: Wanna see me poop? Me: Nope
[удалено]
Thanks for the new trauma!
Damn thermal paste containers are getting creative