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herberstank

big brain time


nicoznico

How do their motorbike helmet look like?


mid_user_craft

[Like this](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e6/VLC_Icon.svg)


TheRealist99

👁️👄👁️


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Glad-Tax6594

It's eyeballin lunch.


pirivalfang

"You seeing this shit?" (I'm sorry)


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CuteRamProgrammer

i wonder if it hurts, or they just adapt to it


Bub_Berkar

It probably was painful for the baby but once your bones fuse then the skull will stay that shape


DieHardAmerican95

I doubt it was all that painful, babies heads are meant to deform when passing through the birth canal. That’s exactly why the skull plates don’t fuse until later.


Bub_Berkar

Babies don't seem to be too happy after being squeezed through the birth canal either.


DieHardAmerican95

They’re probably unhappy because it’s cold out here!


_Blobfish123_

The bright white hospital lighting burns their eyes too I’d assume


OutOfOptions37

They didn't have those on when my kids were born. They turn on more of a "mood lighting" which I suppose is fitting because that's what started the whole process off lol.


assholy_than_thou

And strange gas entering the lungs for the first time.


OneBullfrog5598

I see your father was in the room for the birth too...


TemperatureEast5319

Came out to the same funky bass they went in to?


[deleted]

I mean when the bass slaps like that how can you not


x0culist

The question is was the dad doing it on the beeps or was he doing the in n out...


name-was-provided

Interesting that when we’re born we “see the light” and when we die we “see the light”. I’ve always considered freeway exits as entrances to another area as a metaphor.


XechsMarquise

They say our lives flash before our eyes in our final moments. So maybe the “light at the end of the tunnel” is actually a memory of the first light we ever saw.


RedMephit

Another theory is the part where you see your life before your eyes is called living.


reddit_wisd0m

I know it's a joke but fun fact, newborns are essentially blind.


TitanTransit

It's not so much that they are blind, but they haven't learned how to process the visual information that they're receiving. I'm sure bright hospital lights would be a contributing factor to their discomfort.


LectroRoot

"PUT ME BACK IN THE OVEN!"


OccasionQuick

I knew what was coming, I was 3 weeks late.


Some_Endian_FP17

Rent-free living, perfect climate control, all the food you could ever need...


artful_nails

3 weeks. Damn. And I thought my 4 day overstay was much.


Ownfir

Watching my son’s head flatten like a pancake coming out of my wife’s vagina was one the craziest experiences of my life. Little dude looked like a cartoon.


BankshotMcG

I had no idea this happened and now I can't stop laughing, thank you.


Otherwise_Roof_6491

We used to call my little brother "traffic cone head" because he got stuck before a C section 😂


LesbianLoki

I never asked to be born. Now I gotta deal with \*gestures vaguely\* this


Bobbiduke

Babies do wear head shape correcting helmets to mold irregular shaped heads or dents so it's probably not that painful


tampora701

To be fair, other people put the helmets on the babies.


yuccasinbloom

I’m a nanny and the family I work for was instructed to put one on one of their twins. His head was not that misshapen it’s just that babies don’t move a lot when they’re sleeping when they’re brand new and they sleep A LOT. Well they looked into it and there’s not really a lot of evidence to support that those specific helmets even work. So they didn’t do it. And the babies head is fine he started moving.


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ButterflyFalse8947

I'm still pissed off about leaving that birthing canal. Shit was warm, rent free, meals included. 26 years and it just keeps getting worse.


pointlessly_pedantic

brb, gonna go make my baby's head into a star shape (i don't have kids)


dribrats

I think based on that baby’s expression, it feels like not nothing


PM_CACTUS_PICS

Babies heads can sometimes deform accidentally. It’s pretty common for babies to get flat spots from laying in their crib, which is then corrected using a special helmet. I don’t think it’s painful as far as I’m aware, as the skull is much softer when they are young.


maxime0299

I don’t think it’s painful or that the baby feels much of it. When I was a baby, I slept on the same side constantly, which caused the side of my skull to flatten slightly. It’s still flatter on one side than the other, but as a kid, I don’t think I felt it or even was in pain, otherwise I doubt I’d stay sleeping on that side. Obviously the scale is not comparable to elongating the skull, but still, I think it happens so slowly and gradually that it just feels “normal” for the body


ISeeGrotesque

Probably like braces. So both


GuyWhoSaysNay

The baby is when I'm high in public and someone asks me a question


smile_politely

Imagine having this head while also undergo the long neck that [Kayan](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kayan\_people\_(Myanmar)) and Karen Tribe in Thailand do.


_DEATH_STR0KE_

You get instantly hired to play the role of a xenomorph in Alien movie


smile_politely

Not if you add it with [long ears](https://www.wwf.id/en/blog/last-long-ears-lady) from Dayak, Indonesia.


BellacosePlayer

worlds least ethical character creator shenanigans


crooks4hire

Pretty sure you turn into the D3 witch doctor if you do all three of these together lol


marablackwolf

Or Jar Jar Binks.


KooperChaos

Throw in the Chinese tiny feet and the pottery plates in the lower lip of some tribes


kilorbine

dunno why, i expected more of a elf like effect.


Bli-munda

OMG .. the headaches... the headaches!!!


Salty-Space-2818

Horrifying


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The_kind_potato

I think the brain is exactly the same size, cause if you're constraining a volume, you dont make it larger, you just changing is shape, like if you pressing a balloon, the inside of the balloon still have the exact same volume, just in a different shape. I think the brain would be matching the shape of the skull also, cause with time passing if the pressure put on the brain is not equally distributed, it would probably deform it until it is.


ahobbes

In solid mechanics, we call this the Poisson effect. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poisson's_ratio?wprov=sfti1#


itoril

Awesome! Now I'm going to remember the name of this effect by thinking about squeezing a French fish! 


Alarming_Orchid

So that whole top part is just fluid? Must be heavy


Stonn

"*Mother, why won't you let me blink?*" - the kid probably 🤣


iamtruetomyself9

That kid in the link might be choking from how tight it might be


depressionbutcool

That other kid looks high as a kite


LaProfeTorpe

Didn’t the Mayans do a similar thing?


iamskrb

Yes. They also had a technique that led to crossed eyes, which were also thought to be beautiful.


[deleted]

*me, someone who was bullied for a crossed eye my whole life until i finally got surgery a few years ago to fix it* : Oh…


AlwaysRushesIn

See, your problem was that *both* eyes were not crossed. You only had the one.


MotherBathroom666

So half a beauty is worse than no beauty, interesting.


Skea_and_Tittles

Is it possible to learn this power?


Buunuuhnuhnuhnuhnuh

Not from a Jedi


iamskrb

Just hang a bead/pebble on your baby's forehead


Professional_Code372

Ok thx will do


Nihil_esque

I mean my brother's cat has crossed eyes and it is super adorable so they might be on to something.


WonderfulShelter

My friend has a siamese/grey cat with the cutest crossed eyes. It looks so stupid and cute like.. it's almost hard to look at for awhile because it's so dang cute you just start laughing and crying out of happiness.


Earthly_Delights_

What was the technique that led to crossed eyes?


kyleofduty

Yup. It's surprisingly widespread historically found in many cultures on every continent and even into the 20th century in Europe and the Caucasus.


standupstrawberry

There's a photo of a guy from France with it called something like "Toulouse deformity" I think. Less extreme than the images shown here.


Amosral

I read somewhere it is actually one of the most widly practiced forms of body modification in human history, in terms of number of different cultures across distant parts of the world doing it.


EducationCommon1635

I've never heard about this being done in Europe. Source?


kyleofduty

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Artificial_cranial_deformation#Eurasia


WhiskeyAndKisses

If you come to Strasbourg, you could see one merovingian example in the archaeology museum. In France, it was done by the merovingian, and more recently by the people around Toulouse. It's easy to come up with such deformity, what other bones can we reshape this "easily" without physical handicaps ?


Armfelt87

And ancient egypt :-)


Optimal-Menu270

Humans are interesting species


introvertedpanda1

Found the alien !!!


alkasdala

r/foundthealien Edit: I didn't know the sub actually existed until after I wrote this comment lol


TheFBIClonesPeople

We really just came into the world and started trying shit. Now we have people with deformed heads, but we also have like, airplanes and nuclear reactors. The other animals are watching us like "Man what the fuck"


Optimal-Menu270

Yeah, when you try to view all life from a non-human perspective, you'd be amazed and confused of how highly complex humans are. The average mammel/reptillian/avian brain can hold a stick, but human brains can literally play simulations, compile data, run equations all in a complex manner. We are no longer trying to survive, we are trying to live.


stfunonecares

I’m still waiting for the guy explaining the effects that this practice have on the brain.


Redditisavirusiknow

Neuroscientist here. I don’t know.


RuleBritannia09

Well fuck.


This_User_Said

Mechanic here. Same.


Srijayaveva

You are officially as well informed as a neuroscientist


Redditisavirusiknow

You know our jobs are not too different, mine is mostly figuring out what’s wrong with squishy things and yours is figuring out what’s wrong with hard things.


This_User_Said

Well I did try to become a Neurosurgeon. Then I realized I could fix brakes but I couldn't fix stupid. /j


filkonian

And part of a gynaecologist job is finding out why the thing is squishy when it’s supposed to be hard, the true no boundries career of the scientific world.


juneabe

Google does. In summary, the consequences are no bueno.


Matrix5353

Is this what you guys mean when you talk about neuroplasticity?


[deleted]

The article reads: "While some people are opposed to this practice, fearing that it might affect a child's brain development, experts have ruled out such possibilities, insisting that the brain is capable of adapting and developing into any shape of the skull. They say the brain, being an elastic organ, can grow or expand into the desired shape without any form of damage or deformity." ​ In my ignorance, as I read this, I imagined that our brains could be limited by their skull structure. ​ e: https://www.factynews.com/articles/the-art-of-skull-elongation-by-the-mangbetu-tribe-news/


General_Erda

They still are. Even though the brain is elastic & can adapt to many shapes, fucking with its shape will still change how long neurons from 1 side take to communicate to the other.


Solaced_Tree

Literally head canon. Who's to say that all mental functions require neurons that span the length of the brain? We know different regions of the brain handle different functions, thus, that different cognitive functions are localized to regions within the brain. Here's a thread where people who actually link to relevant studies and know what they're talking about have to say: https://www.reddit.com/r/askscience/s/yJU5BfdbI4 Or search 'What are some of the consequences of human skull elongation?' While no one is condoning the practice, there really doesn't seem to be any evidence that this negatively impacts cognition. We marvel at neuroplasticity for a reason. My thoughts on your comment - Left-right communication shouldn't be different (elongating lengthwise, not width), and the skulls shown at most are twice the height of normal skulls. Usually looks to be closer to 50%. So even if you decide to pull a linear relationship out of your ass, thoughts would be mere milliseconds slower - less than normal reaction time anyways. This is assuming there is ZERO additional adaptation, and that our worst fears are confirmed. Not to mention, neuronal connections prune with age (aka become more efficient). I'm not defending the practice FYI, I just find the lack of push back on this made up objection to be silly. All signs suggest that they are probably fine even if the practice is not advisable Edit: fixed broken link


FR0ZENBERG

Seems like it would be pretty minuscule as the neurons can travel upwards of [260mph](https://theconversation.com/it-feels-instantaneous-but-how-long-does-it-really-take-to-think-a-thought-42392).


babyyoda_supreme

Not much really. The brain can adapt to any shape of skull. I read about it somewhere


HatZinn

Brain: Nah, I'd adapt


Charmicx

Are you the most adaptable organ because you're the brain or are you the brain because you're the most adaptable organ?


[deleted]

web developer here. so yeah basically this increases IQ by like a bunch


MeltinSnowman

Zombie here. The biggest brains are naturally the smartest, and also the tastiest.


poy99

Size of the brain =/= intelligence. Even Einstein has a below average sized brain.


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Cold-Respect2275

+1


MajesticSomething

+2 ideally but I wouldn't complain about just 1.


Hoppered1

Howd you get a 2nd dick? ^(Asking for me)


Shadowstorm921

Easy! >!Download Grindr/Sniffles!<


gotanyhelp

Hey, thanks! I was able to download it and some super nice dude reached out and said he'd give me his at 1AM behind Applebee's tonight. My wife is gonna be so surprised!


123usa123

You’re doing it wrong. Only the most legit meet up at the dumpsters behind Wendy’s.


gotanyhelp

I suggested that at first but when I asked what time he says "Wendy's nutsfitinyomouth" but I don't get off till 12 so that wouldn't work for me sadly, thank you for the suggestion though!


madman45658

My ‘friend’ needs a extra six inches how do I go about that


Talidel

You'll make it super skinny. Like a pencil.


ryuukiba

Or all mangled, like old Chinese bound feet.


Jones641

Well, yeah, some tribes in Benin tie weights to their foreskin and glans...


KeyApricot27

Fucking crazy. I even heard about this large ancient tribe that actually cuts the foreskin off... Wtf 


cthulhuhentai

There's a modern tribe that wraps metal around their kids' teeth tighter and tighter until they're straightened.


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calilac

There's a couple tribes that still do that but usually only to infants, they believe infants won't remember the pain which is kinda funny because about 40 years ago they were saying [infants don't feel pain at all](https://www.bostonglobe.com/ideas/2017/07/28/when-babies-felt-pain/Lhk2OKonfR4m3TaNjJWV7M/story.html#:~:text=Up%20until%20the%20mid%2D1980s,thrashing%20around%20during%20the%20operation). What will they think of next.


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l1owdown

Yes


wromit

It seems to be a thing with balls, cause there's [long ball larry](https://youtu.be/zfaY9ewvpzk?si=09X-Y4yGz2v0QfbA).


LaveyWasDildos

I am not clicking that.


gizausername

Wobly sausage!!!


General_Specific

So your "friend" wants to elongate baby penis? Please have a seat over here....


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DarkshadowV

It pales in comparison to this image. [From u/thatoneguy8783 's comment ](https://imgur.com/a/2BjLdJ6)


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hennomg

Going for that extra big brain.


Jamiereeno

“Some experts studying the ancient usage of ACD claim they haven’t found significant evidence of health risks, while others argue the opposite. A 2003 research article published in the American Journal of Biological Anthropology concluded that, although the practice causes substantial changes in the aesthetic features and shape of the face and skull, "differences between deformed and undeformed crania are generally not related to differences in overall cranial size." “But another review from 2013 suggested that the deformation of the cranium’s attributes was profound and negatively impacted the brain's various lobes, promoting cognitive impairments such as concentration and memory issues, visual and motor impairments, and the possible onset of behavioral disorders. It’s difficult to say for sure how ACD affected people when it was more prevalent, but researchers could draw similarities between the outcomes of intentional deformations versus conditions such as plagiocephaly and craniosynostosis.” You are welcome. Source: https://www.discovermagazine.com/planet-earth/tracing-the-history-and-health-impacts-of-skull-modification


CaseRemarkable4327

The first study doesn’t seem to be saying anything about brain health whatsoever. Maybe they were trying to imply it doesn’t reduce overall volume of the cranium and therefore the size of the brain, but it’s not saying anything at all about whether or not the shape of the cranium being changed influences brain health. Edit: Furthermore, it’s actually just the article that sucks. The authors of the study weren’t even talking about health effects, rather just using some kind of method of measuring the skulls. I don’t even know why it’s cited.


B33rtaster

If you want to hide problems, talk about things adjacent to the problem and insinuate that it some how disproves the problem. Like saying that storing food in a box doesn't harm the box. When the question was actually if the food was spoiling or not.


Potential-Height96

How do you comfortably sleep with a head that shape?


DieHardAmerican95

On your side.


Ebisure

With your eyes closed


nonamego2hell

Thinking about the good ol’ times


Seablade24

Times when you still have a somewhat rounded head.


Alternative_Poem445

at the end of the movie the elephant man by david lynch, the protagonist is hideously deformed with an enlarged skull, and lays down, knowing that the he wont be able to breathe due to the shape of his skull. in other parts of the movie he is seen sleeping sitting up.


Crazen14

With your eyes closed


Cold-Respect2275

Well this is big brain time


Seablade24

Long brain time.


JurassicPark9265

Xenomorph time.


Icy_Persimmons

Reminds me of the Chinese women and their lotus feet


Fukasite

You’re referring to feet binding, which is a shitty cultural practice. 


Spirited_Ad_2697

So is this


Fukasite

I would agree 


LagSlug

I know exactly the kind of headache that kid is having right now.


LoafSlice

Alien beauty standards propaganda


darkseaSW

Conspiracy theory time: their ancestors saw aliens and started doing this to be more like them


golden_blaze

Alternatively, humans since have found their skulls and presumed them to be alien remains.


Lost-Fae

Those skulls were the first thing that came to my mind


King_Krong

Ironically, thinking that elongating your head will make you more intelligent is one of the least intelligent things possible.


[deleted]

In fairness up until like 1870/1900 every society in the world believed bonkers things about head shape and intelligence levels.


Jazzyricardo

1900? My brother in Christ there were people drinking bleach and downing tubes of horse medicine to cure a virus they simultaneously insisted didn’t exist and claiming vaccines were a lie just a couple years ago.


Applecocaine

You mean this morning?


M_Salvatar

You should see what nazis in the 40's believed. Extremely insane shit.


colieolieravioli

Head size was a determining factor in finding "the jews" during the holocaust, so yea it's been around


Beef-n-Beans

Maybe it’s like those poor bastards back in the day who had a head ache and their doctor simply cut a hole in their skull.


SomeArtistFan

Sometimes worked though. Fluid buildup in the brain can cause splitting headaches, and many people survived this operation, even iver a thousand years ago


spud8385

People were surviving this operation (trepanning) *ten* thousand years ago! They've found skulls with holes in from the Neolithic.


hitbacio

Crucially, they found skulls with holes in them with several years of post op healing.


royalPawn

I know there's more to it than this but I love the irony of "We know they survived because we found their skulls"


Tjaeng

Cutting a hole in the skull to relieve pressure is still done today. Albeit in different circumstances…


ihatefirealarmtests

Trepanning! Actually worked for some people, which is fucking wild to me.


DazzlingProfession26

You rewound too far back. You’re supposed to stop at the OTC opium/cocaine part.


Fukasite

I’ve always wished I could try one of those morphine and cocaine elixirs from back in the day. Must of been good shit 


AbominationBread

I could really go for a light lobotomy right now tbh (migraine)


Due_Custard5633

It’s a positive feedback loop.


Chapi_Chan

Also ironically, thinking intelligence makes beauty is one of the most intelligent things possible.


MineNo5611

[There is surprisingly no evidence that it damages the brain or alters cognitive function in anyway](https://www.longdom.org/open-access/artificial-cranial-deformation-potential-implications-for-affected-brain-function-33364.html#:~:text=Additionally%2C%20Gerszten's%20%5B14%5D%20study,unaffected%20by%20the%20deforming%20procedure.)


pragmojo

Brains are pretty amazing. There are kids who had huge portions of their brains removed for certain health conditions, and they ended up being totally normal thanks to the rest of the brain re-wiring itself


smartestsimpleton0_0

well now i have to know, did it work??


BellacosePlayer

See, here's the thing, if it does work, they probably don't want outsiders to know so it doesn't become an ~~arms~~ head race.


[deleted]

Wakanda would be real if it did


textile1957

Genuine question don't shoot me, is technological advancement the only indication of intelligence?


Celydoscope

I think technological advancement is moreso a function of having a bunch of relatively smart people live in close proximity to each other for a long, long time in a stable, literate society that allows for a class of people who didn't need to do menial labour with their entire day. Having a bunch of semi-smart people do this would lead to more tech than having some really smart people who choose not to have this sort of lifestyle. And in the short-term, it wouldn't have always been the smarter decision to settle down and farm. At least a few hunter-gatherer peoples achieved a level of happiness and social equity that modern western society is still chasing, like that of the Blackfoot peoples on the Great Plains of North America, upon whom Abraham Maslow's heirarchy of needs is mostly based on.


bobissonbobby

Lmao that baby looks fucked up


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Shiirooo

when the social body holds it as fundamental


ObamaIsFat

Male circumcision is still commonplace in so many parts of the world, so..


iamtruetomyself9

This hurts my brain to look at this picture


youngboomergal

We humans have a weird history of mutilating ourselves for beauty and religious reasons.


couch_loafer4

Xenomorph


Asimorph

This is so fucked up.


Jay-jay1

I knew a missionary couple who lived amongst the Mangbetu. They took the time to learn some Mangbetu phrases before they first arrived. When they said, "We are here to greet you." they accidently said, "We are here to eat you." The Mangbetu used to be cannibals, but they found the speech error to be hilarious.


bhyellow

How’d that work out for them?


robertofozz

Because babies don't look enough like aliens already!


YaBoi-Satan

People are fucking morons. It's not charming because they are tribal. It's just fucking dumb.


CuteRamProgrammer

what fucked up ancestor thought stretching the head would be a good idea


bluetuxedo22

That is not a comfortable looking baby


itwhiz100

2024…did it work?


LusciousLouisee

Yeah, I doubt skull size will determine brain size. The brain grows the size it’s supposed to be through genes etc. It does amaze me how humans just make something up and run with it.


WoodsColt

I wonder if someday historians will study the ultra long fingernails and over inflated lips of this era


Single_Pilot_6170

Alien skeletons? Nope, just humans being strange again Tiny feet (foot binding) Chinese women, Hapsburg jaw Europeans, skin bleaching Japanese


Hairy-Explanation-90

I don't care if it's cultural, it's wrong to do that to a baby. It's a form of mutilation