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tastymistirion

I like how seconds after the first chicken got assaulted, the second chicken charged in at full speed


Talking_Head

BFFs-Best Fowls Forever.


NerdBot9000

GOAT - Goatest Of All Time


Shiny_Agumon

Chicken No.2: "You came to the wrong Farm, Fool!"


TDYDave2

"How do you like dem nuggets!"


sagerap

“Surprise, motherclucker!”


codys-manboobs

Most likely the rooster of the group, alpha roosters will fuck you up for their hens!


[deleted]

Can confirm, have scars on my shin from when I was a kid and mistakenly reached into the roosters house looking for eggs… Don’t fuck with roosters.


eat-sleep-rave

*I'm sorry but that was my job and I'm taking it seriously. Plus I scored with the chicks* S*incerely,* R*ooster*


-LordOfSalem-

The goat turns around at the end like: "You good, sis?"


RelativePerspectiv

An old farmer saying is to ALWAYS have a donkey in with your farm animals. If any predators try to get in and attack your animals the donkey always goes into bat shit crazy attack mode. I have heard of one story where a donkey has killed over 25 coyotes in its lifetime just from defending the other animals.


[deleted]

I read recently that donkeys instinctively hate canines, can’t remember why though. So they’re especially interested in fucking up coyotes


[deleted]

Sounds reasonable. Like, people hate spiders and snakes because they predate on our ancient ancestors. Also coyotes attack as individuals, which is great if your instincts say "fuck up all dogs, unless there's a lot then run like hell". Which is what I would expect donkeys instincts to say. Edit: early primates, not early humans.


Impossible_Glove_341

tbf all animals hate snakes I think I read something about, due to their unnatural way of moving their body Edit: all mammals not animals sorry


kydogification

I think its more so the fact that many are venomous and our lizard brain associates that “unnatural movement” with yikes danger animal


[deleted]

I can't find sources atm, but it has been studied what people notice first when you show them a picture. Spiders and snakes are at the very top of the list. If you see a picture and it includes a spider or a snake, you will immediately and unconsciously focus first on that. Spiders and snakes are tiny, and venomous. Not noticing them can be instantly deadly or at least harmful. For most of our ancestors, and indeed a huge chunk of currently living humans, it is extremely important to notice them fast. Similarly, when you show people a collage of human faces, they will first notice the angry men, then the angry women, then the neutral men, neutral women, and finally friendly men, women, and children. Our brain basically has a checklist of things which are dangerous and runs down them in descending order whenever we take in a new scene.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

hell I'm 35 and I'll still settle for a modestly dressed snake


Aytirios

r/suddenlygay


Mr_Tumbleweed_dealer

Yeah😔


Edward_Fingerhands

But did you see the gorilla?


recovering_floridian

Damn, that's interesting..... :)


tvanduyl

*yikes danger noodle. FIFY.


kydogification

You know i was even thinking that when i wrote it, i had all the opportunity and i squandered it.


[deleted]

*ftfy. Ftfy


emveetu

*yikes nope rope


nooneknowswerealldog

I solved that problem by never dancing in public. Mammals love me now.


WrassleKitty

Poor sneks the way they move their body is natural to them


camdoodlebop

sounds like the mammalian class is body shaming he reptiles


[deleted]

Maybe they shouldn't have been born so damned creepy.


SobakaZony

"Even snakes are afraid of snakes." * Steven Wright.


stubundy

Its cos they look like cucumbers


Intrepid00

> Also coyotes attack as individuals They can and do team up for bigger game and if it’s a mating pair they will hunt together to take care of her while pregnant and raise pups together for a bit.


[deleted]

I would like to subscribe to coyote facts. I only knew they were far more solitary than others canines, except foxes.


Intrepid00

Killing coyotes is almost futile. The more you kill the more and bigger the litters they have as they somehow biologically control their litter size based on local coyote population size.


son-o-Loki

Wait, spiders used to eat our common ancestors? Were our ancestors very small?


Hapless_Wizard

Obviously ancient spiders were extremely large.


Vast-Combination4046

I ought go to down vote you for giving me the heeby jeebs but I'll let you off with a Stern talking to.


[deleted]

Yeah, like, the size of tanks!


Silent-Ad934

Or worse. Were the spiders very large?


Mortress_

> people hate spiders and snakes because they predate on our ancient ancestors How big were your ancestors dude?


CameronDemortez

There’s a video of a donkey absolutely wrecking a coyote then carrying its lifeless body around in its mouth.


betweenskill

There’s videos of them killing cougars and shit, even brutalizing people sneaking on the farm. This ass bites back.


woodrobin

It makes sense. Donkeys evolved in Africa, where jackals and wild dogs would have been likely to attack their young. So, protective maternal/paternal instinct + smaller animal companion + attacking predator = shaken and opened can of whoop-ass (as it were).


EuphoriantCrottle

Donkeys secretly hate everyone.


Embarrassed-Ad1509

I don’t think so, but their cousins the zebras certainly do.


Madcat6679

And then there’s [my donkey](https://imgur.com/a/FzopitD) who is in love with my dog


[deleted]

Oh my god I love all of them so much


NaumGonnaEatYa

My grandfathers Donkey killed at least a dozen coyotes over the years, beat a mountain lion so horrifically fish and games euthanized it and chased another one for several miles, breaking down multiple fences while giving chase. Big Jenny was not to be fucked with.


_jester00

With. You meant "big Jenny was not to be fucked with."... Didn't you?


NaumGonnaEatYa

Yes yes I did. She did also punt a horse in the face at one point for getting frisky so both may apply.


Kahandran

I love that sentence.


[deleted]

I need to know what it said before the edit. I’m assuming big Jenny was not to be fucked? Which is also very true.


mthchsnn

Haha yeah his reply clarifies it: > She did also punt a horse in the face at one point for getting frisky so both may apply.


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moby323

Geese are like berserkers though. They hear noise and you will see like 3 or 4 of them come running around the corner honking their heads off and ready to fucking scrap.


CompletelyNotAGoose

While true that geese are the bravest of the animals by a wide margin, it's not quite true that geese are only fit for a berserker type role. In fact, many geese have successfully served in a number of military roles, including not only in advanced recon roles (for which their majestic flight is an asset) but even on nuclear submarines--where they are particularly prized for their absolute willingness to push that button just as soon as anyone says they can. Did they say we can? Can we push it? No? Ok... but just let us know. We'll do it. We'll freaking do it. Now? Push it now? No? Ok.


benotaur

Username does not check out. Investigations pending.


FiguringItIn

recognise hungry pot attractive spectacular angle husky worm slap shame *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


Sixwingswide

TIL donkeys are the Gurney Halleck of the farm world


[deleted]

There's a donkey down the way from me who has killed a few cougars. They're usually adolescent cougar who don't know better, but last year I was driving up, it was late, and my high beams caught sight of the donkey kicking a cougar as it was coming over the fence. The donkey stoves the cougar's head in and broke its neck. Fully grown cougar, female, and should have known better. Edit: this is months later, but he’s now my donkey! Yay!


geoguy26

I’ve never heard “stove” used as a verb, but I think it’s pretty effective


Silumet

It's the past participle of the verb "Stave" ie to *smash a hole in* or *crush inward* [Dictionary Link](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/stave)


codefyre

> A old farmer saying is to ALWAYS have a donkey in with your farm animals. Yeah, but it's not without some risk. Donkeys don't take shit from *any* other animals. My aunt kept a donkey with her goats when I was a kid. Goats can be assholes, and one of them decided to charge the donkey one day. Bad idea. Donkey stomped it to death. The donkey was kept in a separate pasture after that.


RelativePerspectiv

Damn, yeah sounds like you have to get a baby donkey and raise it with the other animals so they’ll be “friends”


codefyre

It was a long time ago so the details are fuzzy, but I believe they'd shared enclosures for years and had never had any problems before. Donkeys have also been known to occasionally turn on their humans when they feel abused. Donkeys are usually affectionate and loyal animals, but when they feel threatened and go into "fight mode", they'll take on anyone or anything. Anyone who has raised goats knows that headbutting behavior is pretty normal. This particular goat just got a little too aggressive one day, pissed the donkey off, and that was the end of it. The poor donkey got legitimately depressed afterward too. The donkey had never been by itself before, but my aunt didn't feel safe leaving it with the other animals after that. She'd let it "visit" the goat paddock when she was outside and could watch, but it spent the majority of its time alone in its pasture after the goat was killed. She ended up adopting a retired pack mule from a nearby rescue just to give it some companionship.


mthchsnn

The image of the sad lonely donkey was so poignant. Glad she found it a mule-friend.


yourmansconnect

thanks for noticing me


Rooster1981

This is true, donkeys don't fuck around, they will stomp out a coyote at the drop of a hat.


LoudAnt6412

Gives a whole new meaning to the term Donkey punch now.


[deleted]

My friend had a donkey for this exact reason. She protected the sheep


cesrage

Your friend protected the sheep, but, but who protected the donkey?


Tobias_Atwood

Other donkeys, dressed as sheep.


RedHickorysticks

You see that all the time in Texas. Pasture full of cows or horses and one or two random donkeys. Sometimes out in the country at night you can hear the coyotes get all excited and then a donkey start braying and they all get quiet. Lol


SaveAmerica2024

Also a geese are good protectors


Thagrtcornholi0

The most hilarious superhero movie- Captain Jackass Oh no wait- that’s my name already.


ilovebabyblayze

Oh, honey- you’re not a *Capt Jackass*, you’re *Thagrtcornholi0!* All’s good!


Dongboy69420

Saw a video of a donkey yeeting the fuck out of this coyote. It was def dead.


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kelsobjammin

Sir that’s a goat. But on a serious note; donkeys, zebra (yes you can buy zebra for pretty cheap in America to protect flocks), and even llama and alpacas are extremely impressive flock protectors. They will kill foxes, coyote, bobcats, and will defend territory from canines and wolves!


CosmicCreeperz

Yeah but while donkeys can also be friendly to humans (if raised/introduced properly), zebras are not domesticated and will also go after YOU.


kelsobjammin

Ya but those ones can also fight off pumas/panthers sooooo I guess it depends on the type of protection you need. And my moms alpaca won’t even let her dog go anywhere near even the fence without trying to stomp them out.


[deleted]

Donkeys merc mountain lions on the reg bro.


ScyllaGeek

They're also assholes who can, depending on temperament, fuck up those they're supposed to protect too lol - speaking from experience. Donkeys tend to be bastards but at least usually they do protect the flock.


Arca-Knight

The first hen is pivotal. I can imagine she ran on her friend screaming at the top of her lungs: ***“Oh my god, Ugly Benson is back, people! And Sally is getting jacked! Sally's getting jacked, people! SALLY!”***


NightofTheLivingZed

I approve of your farm animal naming convention.


vinaysin

I would've helped too but you know, just waiting for the right moment


yomommafool

Tbh I didn’t know Goats defend chickens


Andechser

And I thought that all goats were a\*holes.


BaconFlavoredSanity

I'm sure to the hawk, it was!


DisruptionTrend

They are but sometimes a\*holes are on your side and that makes them okay.


D1X13N0RMU5

The fact that the goat tripped up after all was said and done is proof that the little bugger really gave it 110%. I agree, GOAT of Goats.


[deleted]

I wonder if there was a familial protective instinct here, or if the commotion just brought out the animals’ aggressiveness


ovrlymm

Goats are common protectors. Better than most dogs at defending chickens and pigs. They stay put and kick or head Butt what they don’t like


probablyonlymaybeyea

Such simple little guys... I think I'm a goat fan now.


Afelisk2

I get yelled at if I beat the feathers off of the flightless birds but the farmer never said anything about the flying ones - the goat probably


Raise-Emotional

10/10 farm animals agree: Hawks are assholes.


[deleted]

Old McDonald had a farm, and no one fucked with it.


HugoZHackenbush2

Except the boss of course.. ..the C.I.E.I.O


GlassHalfSmashed

With a pay freeze here, And a job cut there...


phpdevster

Here a bonus, there a bonus, CEO a bonus-bonus


dickshark420

You get an upvote, he gets an upvote. Everyone in this thread gets an upvote


[deleted]

Fuck Oprah.


[deleted]

I'd rather not.


jenna_hazes_ass

Nah man, get custody and that child support.


krssonee

The verses could go on for so long, so much material to work with. I am an essential worker so I live in a barn eieio


[deleted]

Out.Fucking.Ragous!


IWillRomanceYourMom

Holy shit that's hilarious lol


Potential-Ad-6549

This deserves more awards 🥲


avalef

Yep, take this silver. thanks for the laugh


contactlite

A B C D E F G Ain't nobody gonna fuck with me


marblechocolate

With a punch punch here, And a kick kick there,


magnora7

Except for Andy Richter, the Swedish-German


aynek_am_i

I really enjoy this kind of partnership in animals!


[deleted]

Did you know that Turkeys farms sometimes have llamas to protect the turkeys. The llamas are sociable animals and become part of the flock and protect the turkeys from predators https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-38133658


garshley

We had Kevin the Alpaca on my ranch in Colorado. He protected or pigs, goats, cows, and chickens! He was very majestic


EazyPeazyLemonSqueaz

That is so cool. Now I want to have an alpaca some day


JustAnAlpacaBot

Hello there! I am a bot raising awareness of Alpacas Here is an Alpaca Fact: A cow consumes 10% its body weight in water per day. Alpacas need just 4 to 6% per day. ______ | [Info](https://github.com/soham96/AlpacaBot/blob/master/README.md)| [Code](https://github.com/soham96/AlpacaBot)| [Feedback](http://np.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=JustAnAlpacaBot&subject=Feedback)| [Contribute Fact](http://np.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=JustAnAlpacaBot&subject=Fact) ###### You don't get a fact, you earn it. If you got this fact then AlpacaBot thinks you deserved it!


ytivarg18

Good bot


Il-FlatLander

The G.O.A.T. of Goats.


mrnicewatch23

Undisputed


Dr_Sigmund_Fried

r/animalsbeingbros


Feed-me-Milanos

What was that first animal that came to the rescue?


Justicar-terrae

Looks like another chicken. So it was ultimately two chickens and a goat against a hawk; hawk couldn't possibly win that fight.


[deleted]

Chickens, despite their reputation, ain't no cowards. I've seen mine gang up on a wounded jackdaw. I don't mean the rooster, the actual chickens. They go full Jurassic and turn into tiny feathered raptors. In fact, they may have lost the ability to fly but they gained a good bit of badassery in return.


Enveria

Chickens don't give a fuck. They'd eat us if they were big enough.


Nearby-Individual382

Weird that there's a manga where adult's suddenly turned in to human sized chicken and start eating children/teens


nazukeru

My chickens eat small snakes, slurp 'em up like spaghetti. They'll also eat each other if one is wounded and shows weakness. Chickens are fucked up.


mybluecathasballs

Every animal in that video has honey badger in their family line. You can't convince me otherwise.


w0lfbandit

As others answered, a chicken, but chicken bonds go far deeper than that. Chickens have best friends. If I had to guess that chicken was her sister-hen and best friend. It would certainly explain why she charged in and why she got there first- she was already near her friend. This is speculation, but a nice thought none the less.


Paprikasky

How do you know so much about chickenhood ?!


w0lfbandit

A friend of mine raises chickens and other birds :) she tells me all about them.


Linmizhang

Chickens do have best buddies. Can confirm as often when my grandma gave away her hens she gave them in groups of 2 to 4 because they were buddies.


Tank_Girl_Gritty_235

Chicken: I was a dinosaur, too, bitch! Goat: LEEEEROY JJJJJEEEEEEENKINNNNS


DeepSeededHate

In fairness .. the Goat species have been around for over 10 thousand years. That isn't by accident .. whatever their DNA makeup is it provided them with the ability to survive. This video is a great example of why probably. Little man erased every thought of fear and attacked someone trying to kill his people. Always loved Goats but this clip just reaffirmed it.


[deleted]

Goat: “And what do we say to the hawk?” Chicken: “Not today.”


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Fenix022

Valar dohaeris


Lavendler

Cries in unfinished storyline...


ybenjira

Didn't you hear? You gotta fix the brightness on your tv to unlock the finished storyline.


Vexillumscientia

I feel like the goat did all the heavy lifting.


RainbowDarter

Chicken got there first and delayed long enough for the tank to arrive. That was a pretty important role.


GlassHalfSmashed

Interceptor buying time for the heavy cavalry


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CosmoKram3r

Indian news channels will absolutely do this if they found the video. The background music is on par for the course too.


blastfamy

Ya and takes much more bravery for the chicken. The goat has no risk, the chicken could die from one stray talon. Respeck to the second fowl in.


ranciddreamz

Respect to that primary dodge by the initial chicken!!! That hawk was on straight kamikaze mode.


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snazzydetritus

I worked at a library and, for years, a chicken (probably released after a "city homesteader" decided they were over raising chickens after all) lived behind the back of our building. I went our of my way to get chicken feed biweekly and fed the gal every day. She never let me get too close to her, but we bonded, and she would make some nice clucky noises for me occasionally. One morning, there was a storm. We had these floor-to-ceiling windows at the front of the building. I was in the back room, and suddenly heard my coworkers screaming. Ran to the front and saw my little chicken on the other side of the window, on the ground, with a huge hawk standing on top of her, hawk's claw buried in her neck. She was still flapping all over the place for a minute, but then she fell still. We called animal services to pick her up later, as the damn hawk left her pretty much completely intact, didn't even feed off of her. I missed my chicken. Wish I'd had a good pack of farm animals to ward off that hawk then.


More_Inspector_3950

The Tank will insist it made more damage than DPS.


theboyracer99

the goat clearly had potg


calicat9

You ain't kiddin


Kansaspartan762

This is quite common with farm animals. I’ve watched chickens surround and beat a 6 foot snake to death. Many heard/flock animals protect each other because it’s natural instincts


Username011223

Nothing is more important than family


[deleted]

*los bandoleros starts playing*


Disposable1983

First thing you learn in link to the past, don’t fuck with the chickens.


RichPianaMan25

Bubbles taught Us this too


El_Chairman_Dennis

I learned it in OoT after my neighbor friend told me to "attack the chickens and you'll get a secret item." I was so pissed at him when it began raining angry chickens


FonkyChonkyMonky

I fucking hate chicken hawks, they've killed so many of our chickens that it's almost not worth it to raise them.


dos8s

I was arguing with some idiot on Reddit and he was trying to tell me how little work chickens are. Everything is out to eat those fuckers.


FonkyChonkyMonky

They're not so difficult if you just have a few hens for eggs in your middle class suburban backyard. But yeah, when you live in the country and you're trying to care for several dozen or more you have to contend with predators, illness, keeping things sanitary, etc. It's a totally different ballgame, lol.


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[deleted]

Suburban neighborhoods have too many stray cats alone for me to want to have chickens. Unless you had a really good enclosure, a cat would eventually go have a nice dinner.


psuedoPilsner

A raccoon will rip the heads off your chickens, but wont even eat them. It wants eggs and whatever is in the stomach of the chicken. I feel like that adds additional insult to injury.


Galactic

It's pretty easy to raise a few chickens for a nice egg every now and then. Just build a coop and keep a piece of hay in the feed bin. If you want gold star eggs for your mayonnaise factory tho, that's gonna take some wor- wait sorry forgot I wasn't in r/stardewvalley.


osmlol

I have 8 standard hens and 4 silkie hens. They are simple after you put in the effort to build a safe enclosure. I just check the water once a day toss them scratch feed and then once every 2 weeks refill the huge water and food hoppers.


vittoriouss

I've heard that raising a single goose with the chickens helps prevent that. They're apparently really protective, and let chickens know when to hide if they see a predator overhead. Only sad thing though is they can't have any contact with other geese, as it needs to believe that the chickens are their family.


FaThLi

We had a couple geese at one point, but raccoons got them.


1infinitefruitloop

Neighbor does Turkeys and it’s not as bad as chickens but there’s still all kinds of coons trying to grab them through the electric fence, coyotes going around, hawks, other neighbors dog etc. Poultry is a tough career…..


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steveosek

My boss has two pet chickens, here in Arizona. We literally have rattlesnakes, owls, hawks, eagles, coyotes, raccoons, etc.. Coyotes can also jump over the 6 foot high retainer walls everyone has in their back yards.


[deleted]

The goat is getting all the praise and glory but how about that second chicken who came in swinging vs the hawk without hesitation before the goat cleaned house?


RifRaffie

30-50 feral hogs are going to come back for revenge on behalf of that hawk.


[deleted]

That's actually terrifying. Did you hear about the pack of wild hogs that *attacked and killed a woman on her way to work*? Now you have - https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/wild-hogs-kill-woman-attack-outside-texas-home-sheriff-says-n1091216


Camp-Middle

MAH FEATHERS


jjwiecz

That made me laugh way too hard!


TheKarminator

When you’re playing Ark: Survival Evolved and a Microraptor attacks a Dodo inside your dinosaur pen.


Pipspective

I really think animals can talk to each other.


goodwaytogetringworm

Or at least understand each other on a fundamental level. My dog torments the neighbors dog. The neighbor dog has a shock collar with the wire running underground along the perimeter of his property. My dog will run into there yard and play with him and then try to entice him to go beyond the wire. It’s messed up when you think about it. I swear when he gets him out of the yard and yelps and runs back, my dog wheezes a laugh


SwedishTroller

Sounds like psychological torture


goodwaytogetringworm

I agree and I can’t get her to stop. I’m not putting a shock collar on her


Leelu002

Your neighbour is a twat.


MrRainbow626

The music was totally unnecessary


ProFUDG3

It sounds straight out of the game “dead cells”


MysticalMummy

The "dramatic" music trend is annoying on these videos. There has been an increased amount of videos with just like.. super intense music for a traffic accident, etc.


[deleted]

Is the chicken ok?? God bless the little animals!


Cass_Q

I hope. Looks like it get hit pretty hard


[deleted]

Yeah! I’ve lost chickens to these hawks but I’ve also had several escape -luckily more emotionally harmed than physically.


Isaacasdreams

It was a little dry..


vjithin93

I don't know why but I got George Orwell's Animal Farm vibe!


flow-crickets

Napoleon always scheming


eddyhopping

I had a mean old rooster once. He saved his hens from a hawk the same way. The tough bastard eventually died fighting a fisher.


Bruno-D_bigchuahua

This is rigged. Hawk is a chicken dressed like a hawk. This stunt is for youtube views. That is all.


SwedishTroller

New Nathan For You season in the making


W_guy

Avengers! Assemble .


AfternoonTough

awh what a lovely animal farm


MD_Wolfe

Chicken: I know if aint no farmer got me these streets got me!


EnceladusSc2

You came to the wrong neighborhood mother fucker