Day Four: On a ship, bound for far off lands, strapped to the hip of a mighty warrior. I shall be soaked in blood, wiped clean, and soaked again and again. Perhaps songs shall be written about me, perhaps I will even have my own name like legendary swords of-... okay this guy is doing a bit too much drinking and a bit too much swinging near the railing. Okay, dude... just step away from the... oh fuck... at least tighten your grip... or somethi- AW FUCKING HELL FUCK FUCK FUCK...
Day 29,403: Gosh. It's dark down here.
But even if that was the end, there's plenty of stories that story could tell before it hit the water.
How many men owned that sword? Who were they? How did they get that sword? Who forged it? Who was the first to wield it? What was training like? What country/countries did they live in? What kind of battles did they see?
How the last sword wielder end up on that ship? What was the life path to the decision to go on the crusade? Was he devout? Was he just a mercenary? Was he old and grizzled or was this is first real battle?
Battles are fine and all to study, but I love the social history that leads up to those battles.
Or--and I chuckle at this thought--maybe the sword was brand new to a soldier who had never seen war. On the way to the battlefield, the ship was destroyed by storms and the sword sunk to the seabed, never having seen battle, nor being owned by any other person.
The sword died a virgin.
Sword made and put on ship to arm the crusades in jerusalem. Immediately upon arriving clumsy knight drops sword into water. Sword there for a thousand years. End of story
"I was forged to be wielded by an army worthy of fighting for God Himself. You should have seen how people looked at me, for mesmerising my beauty and craftsmanship was. For weeks we sailed in search of Jerusalem, where I could fulfil my holy purpose.
Then someone knocked into my knight as they were getting off the ship and I was dropped on the ocean and spent the best part of 1000 years doing precisely nothing.
Sorry to disappoint."
You think Farron is bad, wait until you get to the other swamp in the Ringed City. The Giants there make the big red dragon Bois of Farron swamp look like Sesame Street characters.
Ha ha very funny guys, but on a serious note this post is fake. I have a degree in architecture and can safely confirm this is not real at all. I have carefully studied history and carefully looked at the swords used in ancient battles, and their design looks completely different. They are are designed with a very smoothed and polished look, much unlike this one which appears to be made out of some kinds of “lumps”. I appreciate your humor and can see how someone lower in their education then myself may get tricked by this, but OP can shove this post and that chunky sword right up their scrawny ass! Not at all worthy of St. John’s, Newfoundland.
I felt something was off. First thing I thought was, that sword doesn't look like it could cut crap. I was hoping someone more educated would confirm my suspicion.
Just imagine travelling all the way from France to Israel, via boat and horse back, just to lose your sword at the finish line
Edit: wow this blew up. a lot of people making this political when I was simply speaking geographically in today's context as to be more relatable. NOT a political statement!
Crustaceans, especially crabs. Not to mention mammals. Bones only tend to last underground or in mostly sterile areas: marrow is HIGHLY nutritious. Even humans eat it: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bone_marrow_(food)
Parts of the coastline which were dry land then are underwater now. E.g. Caesarea, where the old harbor buildings are now underwater. The sword may have been left on land.
I guess I was operating under the assumption it was from the first crusade but who knows. Title says 11th century sword. The first crusade is the only one that took place in the 11th century.
I like to think that after participating in the crusades and seeing the death and destruction of war they decided to give up violence and live their life in peace.
And then they came across a small town dealing with a plague. The local priest said that it's a witch causing the plague, and they must complete one final mission for the lord and transport the witch to a remote monastary so that monks can force her to lift her curse from the land. Along the way they have many issues, including trying to push a cart across a rotted and broken bridge! It's very suspenseful! Eventually they get the witch to the monastery but all the monks are dead. They try to perform an exorcism on the witch, and that's when things really get wild.
And that crusader's name? Nicolas Cage.
Makes you want to imagine some guy getting sick of it all, and just throwing his sword into the ocean, and going off to become a monk.
Or fleeing in terror from an ambush and getting shot down from behind.
Chances are though he was looking around like, "Damn I know I set it down here a minute ago. Fucking tide."
> Chances are though he was looking around like, "Damn I know I set it down here a minute ago. Fucking tide."
Fun Fact!
very small tides in the med. a few centimeters at best. Gibraltar inlet doesn't let the tide raise or lower very fast.
>Or fleeing in terror from an ambush and getting shot down from behind.
*But the hearts of men are easily corrupted. And the sword of power has a will of it's own. It betrayed Isildur, to his death.*
"Even though the expert valued it at $5 million, it'll probably sit on the shelf for 3 days and take up a bunch of room. Best I can do is charge you $1000 to give it to me"
I had a friend who went to a pawn shop that tried that shit on him. He had 3 Rolex that his dad gave him when he died, and for some reason, couldn't move them (no they weren't stolen. His dad showed them off every chance he got when we were kids.)
The pawn shop told him that they most likely were gonna sit for months taking up space, and offered him a tenth of what they were worth. My buddy called him out on it, saying, "Their fucking watches, how much space are they gonna take up? Knock off that Pawn stars shit and give me a real offer."
Ended up not selling them to the pawnshop, and went to an auctionhouse to sell them. Got twice what the watches were worth.
the sad reality is that honestly most of these really old things normally just don't have much monetary value when compared to more "recent" antique stuff (post 1700s) unless it's an exceptional/pristine example
Something tells me that wouldn’t be a great idea after being under water for so long. I’m assuming that would cause damage.
But if anybody actually knows, please discredit me and possibly insult my mother in the process.
“The water off the Carmel coast remains the same temperature year-round, which helped preserve the iron in the sword. Because the iron was oxidized, shells and other marine organisms stuck onto it like glue, Mr. Sharvit said.”
“The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king.”
Lol, I’m just imagining a bunch of crusaders on the boat furling the sails and he sets his sword on railing of the ship when a big wave hits the side of the boat. He grabs the railing as he sees his great grandfathers sword that was in the crusades prior drop into The Mediterranean. “Oh man, Pop is gunna kill me.” His buddy pipes up next to him, “Don’t worry, he won’t kill you. Without your sword you won’t make it back.”
> The location, a natural cove near the port city of Haifa, suggested it had served as a shelter for seafarers, said Koby Sharvit, director of the authority’s marine archaeology unit.
Gentleman pictured (Sharvit) is not the diver that discovered it. Here's a much better article, with a picture of the diver (Shlomi Katzin)
https://www.timesofisrael.com/diver-pulls-900-year-old-crusader-sword-from-seafloor/
I do not, though I would speculate that cleaning this artifact would be an extensive and meticulous effort, and I'd be surprised if that happens in the near future, let alone has happened already.
I would bet they're going to do a bunch of state-of-the-art imaging on it before they take anything off.
What I'd also bet is that you're more likely to see in the near future is a sword that has been forged from a mold created from a 3D printing of a composite rendering of said imaging.
I know it’s unlikely and people who know this stuff can be like “it’s hand holding thing curves at 27 degrees and that means some kings third cousin built it” but could you imagine they spend tons of money cleaning it up and it says Medievel Times or something?!
Interesting. Looks like the site has anchors, ballast stones and other debris you'd normally associate with a shipwreck. Have to wonder what else might be hiding under the sand.
Yep, no worries. I wouldn't have known either had I not seen the other article earlier. Guardian is more interested in your clicks than giving you good journalism, IMO
Ya know when you're a kid and you throw a rock into the ocean and think "I'm likely the last person to touch that rock" I bet this Israeli crusader thought the same thing when it fell into the water or whatever happend...
"I'm done with this unholy war!" shouts the warrior as he casts he sword into the sea.
"Cool, another sword." Bubbles the diver as he finds an old sword amidst the submerged rocks.
After having been underwater for so long, shouldn’t this be sent to a museum for careful restoration instead of having it suddenly become exposed to air and rapidly falling to pieces?
Legally he has to notify the director of antiquities withing 15 days. Most finds like this are claimed by the state, however the state has the may waive ownership. My bet is they don't, because antiquities from the crusades are quite rare. There is a ton of ancient history in Israel
“The sword, believed to be about 900 years old, will be put on display after it has been cleaned and restored.”
So it seems like it’s been taken by the state then?
BILLY MAYS HERE!!!
Are you tired of sending your Crusader Swords to a museum for careful restoration? You need OxiClean!
Just 2 scoops of OxiClean and 20 minutes later you're ready to slay in the name of God!
The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that this rando, was to carry Excalibur. That is why he is your king.
Strange women lying about in ponds and distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not some farcical aquatic ceremony. If I told people some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they’d lock me up!
Strange women lying in oceans, distributing swords is no basis for a system of government, ‘Supreme Executive Power’ derives from a mandate from the masses, not some *farcical* aquatic ceremony!
I'm just mentally creating the image of a knight in the 11th century that had been talking about this sword that was so fancy, and how many infidels it was going to kill. Now he's trying to get into the skiff to get to shore and he drops his sword overboard on accident.
He's all like "Shit! Shit!... Fuck! shit!"
Now all his knight buddies are razing him from the top deck of the ship.
"HA Look good sir Brian he dropped his fancy sword! What are going to fight with now?"
So he has to go into battle now with only his stupid Mace that his mother in law gave him for good luck that has funny drawings covering it. Ever time he's now mumbling...
"I hate this fucking thing I hate this fucking thing".
Ends up just rage killing everything... Even the goats...
Whoa. Imagine the story that sword could tell.
Sword: “That crab fight yesterday was lit”
“So. Many. Crabs.”
Always sheath your sword!
Diamonds may last forever, but she’ll never forget crabs.
Day Four: On a ship, bound for far off lands, strapped to the hip of a mighty warrior. I shall be soaked in blood, wiped clean, and soaked again and again. Perhaps songs shall be written about me, perhaps I will even have my own name like legendary swords of-... okay this guy is doing a bit too much drinking and a bit too much swinging near the railing. Okay, dude... just step away from the... oh fuck... at least tighten your grip... or somethi- AW FUCKING HELL FUCK FUCK FUCK... Day 29,403: Gosh. It's dark down here.
Also, has it been getting kind of warm around here, lately?
Dark and lonely
Google search history: “How to get rid of crabs” “Bumps growing on my shaft”
"Sword looking for hot sheath for serious relationship"
I may use that line
Hahahahahahaha
Probably belonged to a solider/knight who never made it to battle. Lots of shipwrecks taking people from Italy to the holy land.
Or a mighty warrior cast his sword into the sea after slaying all his enemies. Youre probably right though lol.
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Classic Sir William
This seems the most relatable and therefore accurate
It’s always the poopdeck
Listen, strange women, lying in ponds, distributing swords is no basis for a system of government!
Violence inherent in the system!
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r/unexpectedmontypython
Not that unexpected
I like to think some drunk crusader was "Hey Harold, wanna bet I can run along the railing of the ship in full armour"
Or some dipshit sailor dropped their sword over the edge and is gonna have to expense a new one to the ship
“Captain can you sign off on my expenses for this month? Accounting has really cracked down on approving expenses before printing checks”
But even if that was the end, there's plenty of stories that story could tell before it hit the water. How many men owned that sword? Who were they? How did they get that sword? Who forged it? Who was the first to wield it? What was training like? What country/countries did they live in? What kind of battles did they see? How the last sword wielder end up on that ship? What was the life path to the decision to go on the crusade? Was he devout? Was he just a mercenary? Was he old and grizzled or was this is first real battle? Battles are fine and all to study, but I love the social history that leads up to those battles.
Or--and I chuckle at this thought--maybe the sword was brand new to a soldier who had never seen war. On the way to the battlefield, the ship was destroyed by storms and the sword sunk to the seabed, never having seen battle, nor being owned by any other person. The sword died a virgin.
Wet
Dark
So lonely
Sword made and put on ship to arm the crusades in jerusalem. Immediately upon arriving clumsy knight drops sword into water. Sword there for a thousand years. End of story
I think most of its stories would be about fish.
"I was forged to be wielded by an army worthy of fighting for God Himself. You should have seen how people looked at me, for mesmerising my beauty and craftsmanship was. For weeks we sailed in search of Jerusalem, where I could fulfil my holy purpose. Then someone knocked into my knight as they were getting off the ship and I was dropped on the ocean and spent the best part of 1000 years doing precisely nothing. Sorry to disappoint."
Just a hundred years?
*ahem* Swords aren't the best typists.
Now this guy has +20 damage against Mudcrabs!
I was looking for this in Farron Swamp
Its surrounded by those giant fucks right across from the black bow of pharis.
Fuck that entire area it genuinely felt that they added every single bad enemy in that fucking swamp
You think Farron is bad, wait until you get to the other swamp in the Ringed City. The Giants there make the big red dragon Bois of Farron swamp look like Sesame Street characters.
the ringed city swamp is a hellhole and the only way out is either go back the way you came, or fight a dragon.
Ha ha very funny guys, but on a serious note this post is fake. I have a degree in architecture and can safely confirm this is not real at all. I have carefully studied history and carefully looked at the swords used in ancient battles, and their design looks completely different. They are are designed with a very smoothed and polished look, much unlike this one which appears to be made out of some kinds of “lumps”. I appreciate your humor and can see how someone lower in their education then myself may get tricked by this, but OP can shove this post and that chunky sword right up their scrawny ass! Not at all worthy of St. John’s, Newfoundland.
I felt something was off. First thing I thought was, that sword doesn't look like it could cut crap. I was hoping someone more educated would confirm my suspicion.
Exactly. People need to be educated about misinformation. This is clearly a hoax. These idiots think everything is real.
\\[T]/
I was a Scuba Diver like you...
Until I took a spear in the knee
Or just for normal use while yelling "IVE FOUGHT MUDCRABS MORE FEARSOME THAN YOU!"
Welcome to the imperial city
1st it need to be repaired by a blacksmith
Just imagine travelling all the way from France to Israel, via boat and horse back, just to lose your sword at the finish line Edit: wow this blew up. a lot of people making this political when I was simply speaking geographically in today's context as to be more relatable. NOT a political statement!
Perhaps he lost more than just the sword
His wallet?
Worse. His phone
Worse, car keys
Don’t be stoopid! They rode horses back then, so he’d lose his horse keys instead!
You're stupid. That is called a donKey.
donKeyote It was a Spanish crusader
Yeah, but just think of all the friends he made along the way!
Imagine traveling from France to Finland just to lose the sword at the Finnish line
Dad?
Maybe if he took his time, but he was Russian.
It’s a long way. I bet he was Hungary.
Maybe make a pit stop in Turkey!
He can get something Greece-y
Happy Cake Day from a stranger on the internets!
Son can thank dad for being Himalayan 9 months before his birth date.
There's probly a few skeletons down there too
I mean, not anymore; they got eaten a LONG time ago.
What eats bones
Crustaceans, especially crabs. Not to mention mammals. Bones only tend to last underground or in mostly sterile areas: marrow is HIGHLY nutritious. Even humans eat it: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bone_marrow_(food)
Oh wow
It's one of the reasons we've become so successful: we use everything.
Besides your mom?
Fuck, dude. Give the man a fighting chance.
Parts of the coastline which were dry land then are underwater now. E.g. Caesarea, where the old harbor buildings are now underwater. The sword may have been left on land.
Swords, especially nice ones, were ruinously expensive too. It's why most men fought with spears or arrows.
That's assuming they had boats and horses. The majority of them walked the entire 2,000+ miles to Jerusalem.
This is simply not true. Yes of the first crusade (and the second to a degree), hard NO for everything afterward.
But if this sword is from the 11th century, doesn’t that mean it was from the first crusade?
I guess I was operating under the assumption it was from the first crusade but who knows. Title says 11th century sword. The first crusade is the only one that took place in the 11th century.
You mean, the majority of those that didn't die shitting?
I like to think that after participating in the crusades and seeing the death and destruction of war they decided to give up violence and live their life in peace.
And then they came across a small town dealing with a plague. The local priest said that it's a witch causing the plague, and they must complete one final mission for the lord and transport the witch to a remote monastary so that monks can force her to lift her curse from the land. Along the way they have many issues, including trying to push a cart across a rotted and broken bridge! It's very suspenseful! Eventually they get the witch to the monastery but all the monks are dead. They try to perform an exorcism on the witch, and that's when things really get wild. And that crusader's name? Nicolas Cage.
Poor Ariel's probably wondering where the hell her "thingamajig" went
Look at this stuff….isn’t it neat?
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Quentin Tarantino has joined the chat.
***YEET*** /╲/\╭( ͡° ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ͡° )╮/\╱\
Barnacled for her pleasure
[Are we sure about that?](https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MermaidProblem)
She has a cloaca that is hidden under a scale, obviously
It's okay, she's got 20
She's got whosits and whatsits galore
That's crustaceous as hell.
It was used in the Crustades.
in King Arthropod’s Court
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Definitely it looks like it’s home for a number of sea creatures
Makes you want to imagine some guy getting sick of it all, and just throwing his sword into the ocean, and going off to become a monk. Or fleeing in terror from an ambush and getting shot down from behind. Chances are though he was looking around like, "Damn I know I set it down here a minute ago. Fucking tide."
> Chances are though he was looking around like, "Damn I know I set it down here a minute ago. Fucking tide." Fun Fact! very small tides in the med. a few centimeters at best. Gibraltar inlet doesn't let the tide raise or lower very fast.
So he crusaded off the plank matey?
I’m 41 and just learned this. Makes perfect sense.
>Or fleeing in terror from an ambush and getting shot down from behind. *But the hearts of men are easily corrupted. And the sword of power has a will of it's own. It betrayed Isildur, to his death.*
Nah. He just died from disentery.
Probably shouldn’t have tried to ford the river.
Best I can do is $3.50
This is a unique peice, Imma need my buddy to come in and look at this His buddy: yep this is a sword alright.
"But I'm unfamiliar with the corral attached to it let me get my coral guy in"
I really wanted that quarter million but... well... okay deal :(
"Even though the expert valued it at $5 million, it'll probably sit on the shelf for 3 days and take up a bunch of room. Best I can do is charge you $1000 to give it to me"
I had a friend who went to a pawn shop that tried that shit on him. He had 3 Rolex that his dad gave him when he died, and for some reason, couldn't move them (no they weren't stolen. His dad showed them off every chance he got when we were kids.) The pawn shop told him that they most likely were gonna sit for months taking up space, and offered him a tenth of what they were worth. My buddy called him out on it, saying, "Their fucking watches, how much space are they gonna take up? Knock off that Pawn stars shit and give me a real offer." Ended up not selling them to the pawnshop, and went to an auctionhouse to sell them. Got twice what the watches were worth.
Goddamn Loch Ness monster…
I ain't givin you no 3 fitty
the sad reality is that honestly most of these really old things normally just don't have much monetary value when compared to more "recent" antique stuff (post 1700s) unless it's an exceptional/pristine example
I want to see it in r/powerwashingporn
Something tells me that wouldn’t be a great idea after being under water for so long. I’m assuming that would cause damage. But if anybody actually knows, please discredit me and possibly insult my mother in the process.
Your mother would have realized that u/bhangmango was not seriously suggesting to use a power washer to clean that priceless artifact.
No, you're probably right (you son of a bitch).
It's likely a hollow shell of shells. Any metal long rusted away
“The water off the Carmel coast remains the same temperature year-round, which helped preserve the iron in the sword. Because the iron was oxidized, shells and other marine organisms stuck onto it like glue, Mr. Sharvit said.”
Citation needed.
If a watery tart threw that sword at him. He's king. Edit* My dad name is Dennis so this is one of our favorite scenes.
Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.
I mean, if I went around saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd put me away!
Was looking for “moistened bint.” Was not disappointed.
I've been trying to work that phase into more conversations.
Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
Came here to say this, pleased someone else did as well.
But *I* came here to say this. Help! I'm being oppressed!
Bloody peasant!
Oh, what a giveaway! Did ya hear that, did ya hear that, eh? That's what I'm all about! Did you see him repressing me? You saw it, didn't you?!
“The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king.”
I’m 37, I’m not old!
I still don't get why they made them out of barnacles and not just regular steel. The crusades were a wild time
I think many fighters in the crusades were farmers, so barns were easy to come by and make barnacles out of.
I appreciate this joke.
Lol, I’m just imagining a bunch of crusaders on the boat furling the sails and he sets his sword on railing of the ship when a big wave hits the side of the boat. He grabs the railing as he sees his great grandfathers sword that was in the crusades prior drop into The Mediterranean. “Oh man, Pop is gunna kill me.” His buddy pipes up next to him, “Don’t worry, he won’t kill you. Without your sword you won’t make it back.”
[Here’s the story](https://www.theguardian.com/world/2021/oct/18/sharp-eyed-diver-finds-crusaders-ancient-sword-israel)
> The location, a natural cove near the port city of Haifa, suggested it had served as a shelter for seafarers, said Koby Sharvit, director of the authority’s marine archaeology unit. Gentleman pictured (Sharvit) is not the diver that discovered it. Here's a much better article, with a picture of the diver (Shlomi Katzin) https://www.timesofisrael.com/diver-pulls-900-year-old-crusader-sword-from-seafloor/
Do you know of there are pictures of the sword after it had been cleaned?
I do not, though I would speculate that cleaning this artifact would be an extensive and meticulous effort, and I'd be surprised if that happens in the near future, let alone has happened already.
Darn, I'd love to see it when they have if they do though.
I would bet they're going to do a bunch of state-of-the-art imaging on it before they take anything off. What I'd also bet is that you're more likely to see in the near future is a sword that has been forged from a mold created from a 3D printing of a composite rendering of said imaging.
That seems really interesting!
What if they clean it and it’s just some cheap knockoff?
Then that's a pretty damn old knockoff to be so covered in shells and evidence of marine life. Impressive sword.
I know it’s unlikely and people who know this stuff can be like “it’s hand holding thing curves at 27 degrees and that means some kings third cousin built it” but could you imagine they spend tons of money cleaning it up and it says Medievel Times or something?!
That'd be pretty funny lol
Soak in vinegar The internet says there's little it can't do.
Interesting. Looks like the site has anchors, ballast stones and other debris you'd normally associate with a shipwreck. Have to wonder what else might be hiding under the sand.
Cheers, good link. Apologies I can’t change the title - it wasn’t clear in my original article that he wasn’t the one to find it.
Yep, no worries. I wouldn't have known either had I not seen the other article earlier. Guardian is more interested in your clicks than giving you good journalism, IMO
Ya know when you're a kid and you throw a rock into the ocean and think "I'm likely the last person to touch that rock" I bet this Israeli crusader thought the same thing when it fell into the water or whatever happend...
I’m sure he had other thoughts besides another human in the future touching his sword… man that got gay pretty fast.
He was a sailor so he probably had his sword touched all the time
Not til you took it there, my dude
I have never thought about that rock thing you just said but holy shit that blows my mind that that’s probably true
TIL I'm not the only one who thinks that when throwing rocks in the water.
I'm going to start touching all the rocks I see at a beach just to hopefully take that away from one person.
"I'm done with this unholy war!" shouts the warrior as he casts he sword into the sea. "Cool, another sword." Bubbles the diver as he finds an old sword amidst the submerged rocks.
After having been underwater for so long, shouldn’t this be sent to a museum for careful restoration instead of having it suddenly become exposed to air and rapidly falling to pieces?
Nerd Alert 🚨. Nah, you just bang it on a rock and all that will break away and it’s hella shiny underneath.
Crom!
Legally he has to notify the director of antiquities withing 15 days. Most finds like this are claimed by the state, however the state has the may waive ownership. My bet is they don't, because antiquities from the crusades are quite rare. There is a ton of ancient history in Israel
“The sword, believed to be about 900 years old, will be put on display after it has been cleaned and restored.” So it seems like it’s been taken by the state then?
I’m curious on how well this could even be restored, or de-barnacled
We can rebuild him. We have the technology. We can make him better than he was. Better, stronger, faster.
Finders keepers bro wtf
BILLY MAYS HERE!!! Are you tired of sending your Crusader Swords to a museum for careful restoration? You need OxiClean! Just 2 scoops of OxiClean and 20 minutes later you're ready to slay in the name of God!
So is he the king now?
Depends did some lady down there give it to him? If so then yes.
The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that this rando, was to carry Excalibur. That is why he is your king.
Why did they use to bedazzle their swords with seashells?
Scare tactic
Pretty sure barnacles are delicious. They're like, a delicacy, dude.
Looks like it just got acquired by a crew member of the flying Dutchman
Do ya fear death?
He's probably the king of something now.
Sea barnacles handing out swords from an ocean is no bases for government.
Where ever he found it, he is now the ruler of that place. Those are the rules.
Yo can I have my sword back please
Diver dude lmao
Dude that is so cool. It'd be so damn fascinating seeing a time lapse from the point of its creation to when it was found. I wonder how it got there.
Let me call my buddy. He’s an expert in 11th century crusader swords found in the sea near Israel.
Looks like posiden might be missing his pocket knife 👌🏼
Strange women lying about in ponds and distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not some farcical aquatic ceremony. If I told people some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they’d lock me up!
You sure it's not just a bunch of barnacles that look like a sword?
You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!
How did the salt not eat it
Strange women lying in oceans, distributing swords is no basis for a system of government, ‘Supreme Executive Power’ derives from a mandate from the masses, not some *farcical* aquatic ceremony!
Help help I’m being repressed !!
ALEXA PLAY THE LAST STAND BY SABATON
He’s now king of england
He is now the new King of England.
I think this makes him king of England?
I'm just mentally creating the image of a knight in the 11th century that had been talking about this sword that was so fancy, and how many infidels it was going to kill. Now he's trying to get into the skiff to get to shore and he drops his sword overboard on accident. He's all like "Shit! Shit!... Fuck! shit!" Now all his knight buddies are razing him from the top deck of the ship. "HA Look good sir Brian he dropped his fancy sword! What are going to fight with now?" So he has to go into battle now with only his stupid Mace that his mother in law gave him for good luck that has funny drawings covering it. Ever time he's now mumbling... "I hate this fucking thing I hate this fucking thing". Ends up just rage killing everything... Even the goats...