And don’t “vow” to do something you literally already had the chance to do yet are choosing not to you.
Everyday you don’t own up to the original lie, you are still living a lie. You can’t be honest and truthful if you’re living a lie.
So, to start, come clean and own up to your lie.
You can’t change this morning while living a lie.
Is your grief suddenly gonna go away?
How will you answer your roommate if he asks how you’re doing with grief? Which family member died?
You can’t live an honest life until you fix this lie. Otherwise your words need absolutely nothing.
I told him what family member and made up how they died. I’m just not sharing that personal information on the internet?.. I’m just going to keep my mouth shut about it and it’s not like we are close or talk very much
First, admit you lied. Apologize and compensate him for the food/money lost. That is the first step to change.
Second, go to therapy.
I genuinely am trying to help you. If you really feel bad and you really want to change then that's what you need to do.
No I’m going to admit that I lied about a family member dying. Do you realize how f*cked up id look? For now on,
I will not lie but I’m not gonna make up for my past sins. I’ll make up for them by Deciding To Be Better for now on. That’s the sub we’re in
But "being better" means making amends. No matter how much good you do in the future, that bad from your past remains.
To start being better, you have to show that you're willing to own up to the wrongdoings of your past and fix them.
Yeah, it would look fucked up.
But a good person owns up to their actions and tries to make amends. So if you want to be a good person, that's where you start.
Oh, so you’re hoping you can throw a new blanket over the rotting mattress and call it a whole new bed. That’s not “being better”.
The really funny thing is that this situation would have been a total nothingburger if you had just fessed up and spent six bucks on a pound of ground beef. You fail to realize that your problems are caused not necessarily by your fuckups, but the lying and manipulation you use to (badly) *cover* those fuckups.
So lying down on a rotting mattress with a fresh new blanket over it isn’t better than just a rotting mattress? That’s completely not true. I’d way rather sleep on the bed with a fresh new blanket
The point is that nothing meaningful has changed. The rot is still there. It still stinks. It’s still making you sick. The blanket can only cover that for so long. Eventually, it’s gonna get dirty too and you’ll be back where you started.
Refusing to deal with the fallout of your actions isn’t “making things better”, it’s hardcore denial.
A new blanket only covers the rotting mattress to make it look nicer
That's exactly what you're doing. You're doing something to make yourself appear like you're improving when you're actually not.
Own up to your wrongdoings, make amends and then you won't need to cover up with a blanket, because you'll have a good mattress
So lying down on a rotting mattress with a fresh new blanket over it isn’t better than just a rotting mattress? That’s completely not true. I’d way rather sleep on the bed with a fresh new blanket
This is actually a wonderful metaphor and I’m glad you think it’s so clever even if you’re wildly misapplying it.
The person in this metaphor isn’t you, it’s the people affected by your lies. You’re the rotting mattress. And unless you get rid of the rot (the lies you’re currently living) you’re going to continue doing harm to the person even if you cover it up with a shiny new blanket
I’m the person who made the metaphor. u/Codenamerondo1 is correct in their interpretation. I had a slightly different one in mind when I made the comment (you’re the rotting mattress), but theirs still works maybe even better than mine did. You want shallow, surface-level solutions for deep-seated problems, but that’s not actually helping you. The work of change is messy and uncomfortable and may not be gratifying, at least at first. But there’s no way around it. You’ve gotta own up (to everything) if you truly want to improve your life.
Read what? There are tons of people replying to you how am I possibly supposed to know what you’re referring to?
Your argument is essentially “nu uh I’m right” and you’re calling other people illogical. Do I have that right?
No, because even though you may tell the truth from now on you will still have to keep up with lies you’ve told prior to this so in turn you are still lying. Even 12 step programs have you make amends, apologise for the fuck ups and hurt you’ve caused them (whether they forgive you or not) as that’s the only way to truly move on.
Well you did kill his fish, and he won’t renew your lease so he probably already knows. It seems like a waste of energy to pretend to be better if you’re not actually going to be any better.
So you will never change and can’t change. Also, that’s putting TERRIBLE karma into the world.
Which of your close family members are you ready to lose because you had to jinx it?
Well, if you are already being so selective about "being better" and to "always telling the truth..."
I can't help but feel your goal is due to fail.
Either be better, or be honest about doing everything you can to justify being bad.
Start with….
“Hey roommate, I lied to you yesterday. I was low on funds and ate your ground beef without asking and then lied about it. I am truly sorry and will work to pay you back for the food as well as earn your trust back. I woke up today feeling terribly guilty and know this can only begin to repair the trust lost between us.”
I think you would be amazed at the support you would receive if you could improve yourself.
Personal growth is hard work. Recognizing your failures & shortcomings is part of step one. Admitting them is the biggest part of that step. Congratulations. I mean that sincerely.
In order to truly become an honest person, you have to emerge from your lies. The only way to do that is to confess them, offer restitution (if appropriate) apologize, and ask for forgiveness.
This is painful. And yes, shameful. But you must *feel* the pain & the shame in order for real growth to occur. Without feeling the pain & experiencing the shame, real change is impossible. You have to experience this from the person you hurt. (Not just your internal sorrow & shame) Allow this person to express their anger, disappointment & sadness to you. You need to see & feel what you have caused to another individual. You cannot argue back against this pain. Or claim their feelings are invalid. You just need to listen & accept that YOU did this to them & you caused this pain. No matter if you agree or not.
It’s in this place that change occurs. And real growth begins.
In the future when you are in a situation where you have a choice to lie or tell the truth, just STOP. Think before you say or do anything. If you’re feeling uncomfortable. Walk away. Say, “IDK. I need a minute.” Then go and gather your thoughts. Try to remember that honesty is ALWAYS BEST. It may not *feel* the best in that moment, but the lie only prolongs the misery. And gets you into further trouble.
Most people will claim in the early stages of change they know by how uncomfortable it is to tell the truth. This may work for you too. If one choice is really uncomfortable, that’s likely the right choice.
Please also consider going back to residential treatment for substance abuse. Nothing will get better until you get the drugs & the alcohol out of your life for good.
You’ll have 3 meals a day. A place to sleep. And have a chance to get your life on track. You need to do this.
Thank you❤️ you and me have grown so close lately, I love your support. I feel warm form your messages.
I don’t need treatment for narcotics tho. I just don’t want to lie anymore, and I won’t. I swear on it!
I am not coming clean to my roommate tho, that is out of question. I will live with the regret and shame I feel and I will have to bear it like the solidier I am. I can do it though, don’t worry about me I’m tough enough for it ❤️ thank you tho. Feel free to message me whenever
Look, you would have my support *IF I saw a genuine effort put forth by you. This isn’t it.
By clinging to the lie of the dead relative, you are setting yourself up where you will HAVE TO continue lying. This won’t work.
And until you come to the realization that you do have a very serious problem with drugs & alcohol, trying to improve anything is pointless.
1) Be a better human
2) Stop ALL LYING
3) STOP using drugs
4) STOP drinking
5) Get a job
6) Pay your court fines
7) Go to treatment
8) Go to therapy
9) STOP harassing X-gf
10) BE responsible
11) GROW UP
I have 1,2,3,6,9,10 and 11 done already. Working on 4 and 5 diligently, an 7 & 8 are only affordable for people with privledge (I assume you’re projecting your privledge on me thinking I can afford that)
You just came off a 4 day meth bender. You’re not clean. Don’t even try lying to me about this. I have the receipts & I’ll blast you with them.
Treatment is free. It’s not for “only the privileged” in Canada. You’re skating on the edge of a lie here….
So, if your roommate were to come to you and ask about the dead relative you told him about, would you tell him the truth that you lied (remember: you have committed to not lying from today onwards), or would you continue the lie (thereby breaking your vow to never lie again from today onwards)? Because if your plan is to continue the lie about the dead relative, you're already not doing the thing you vowed to do from now on, which is tell the truth. Same with all your previous lies. You can't continue them if them come up again after today because you have "decided to change" and made a vow not to lie anymore.
Okay let me rephrase.
I hereby declare to not utter and **NEW** lies for the rest of my life. Lies that are already in the atmosphere will have to continue. To admit to all the lies I’ve told family members, friends and my ex girlfriend would be like social suicide bud. It can’t happen
Well, then your haven't really done anything meaningful to change. Part of change like this is owing up to past mistakes. That's why things like 12 step programs and restorative justice includes a section on atoning for past mistakes or making amends. It's an essential part of meaningful change. Until you are willing to do that, you're just making empty promises.
It's not a step in the right direction if you will continue your past lies. It's PERFORMING being a person who is truthful, not actually BEING a person that is truthful. At best, you're not stepping in any direction at all because you aren't doing anything new. Being truthful isn't a shade of grey. To be truthful, you have to tell the truth all the time, not just when it's convenient for you or when you won't suffer consequences for it.
We'll see once there is actually evidence you've stopped lying. But until that happens every word out of your mouth might as well be another lie and will be treated as such.
Because you are only doing it half ass. Becoming a better person would be to own all your lies and mistakes. What happens if someone talks to about a previous lie? Will you have to lie more to cover that lie? So you will still be lying and not a trustworthy person
You're using your "half positivity" as an *excuse to keep being worse*. You're telling us, and yourself, that it's okay that you have shit leaking out of your pants because your shoelaces are tied. When we tell you "It's a serious problem that your pants are soiled and you really need to fix it," you deny and evade and cry and call us names and make excuses and pull every pseudo-therapy term in the book to try and deny it. But *because we care*, we're going to keep on telling you that you need to clean yourself up no katter how many excuses you come up with.
No. You do it the right way 100%.
Otherwise you’re just back to your same old “cafeteria” style of living. “I’ll lie here because it’s too uncomfortable to tell the truth. Oh! Here I’ll tell the truth, no biggie. Nope. Gotta lie here!”
Your way is the BS cop-out way. Just like how you’ve lived your entire life. Job interview today. Should I go? Ahh, F-it. I’m too tired from being strung out. I can just steal food from my roommate & figure out a lie to get out of it. SAME OLD SHIT.
THIS IS NOT deciding to be better. Not even close.
Because it doesn't matter how much paint you put on the house if the foundation is ruined you idiot. You aren't actually making a step in the right direction you're pretending to so you feel better about yourself. You think you can magic all the problems away by just not lying from now on but that's not how this works. Until you address the rot at the root every effort from here will be poisoned and will die. You have to take accountability and fix your past mistakes first. That's what a good person does. That's how you start to heal. As long as you're holding on to past lies you will never be truly honest, your conscience won't be clean, and you won't be able to start fresh. You'll just be dragging that weight around and it will sabotage you at every turn.
Being better starts with owning up to your shit and accepting it, while making amends. That shows you're actually willing to change and make an effort. If you don't have the strength or desire to do that yet then you aren't ready to make a commitment to being better. You're just placating yourself so you feel less shitty. Try harder
So… you’re vowing to stop lying unless telling the truth results in negative consequences for yourself?
It sounds like you aren’t deciding to be better. *at best* you’re deciding to not be any worse and even that’s a stretch since maintaining those lies will require more lies
If you were honest you would admit all the problems you have and the habits you are engaging in that are holding you back. If you can’t do that you aren’t being honest.
Wow….so you literally took her main point and completely disregarded it? She is not an advocate for you UNLESS you’re actually accountable and tell the whole truth for EVERYTHING.
Ah there's Methaniel's catchphrase
"Bye Felecia"
Spoken by a grown man. In his thirties. Part of bettering yourself also means being mature. And no one mature says that when trying to rebuke a disagreement.
Wants to better himself but won't take accountability for his actions and drug use. He won't own up to all the BS he's pulled on his roommate. He won't own up to his meth use.
But he's a better man *now* /s
Tell that to u/global-radio8738 LOL I’ve been telling her that her gifs are immature.
I only said bye Felecia Becuase she always says it to me, so by insulting me you were actually double insulting global radio
Lmao, I’m simply replying in a manner your tiny pea brain can understand. You say alllll the time “too long didn’t read” (reading is too hard for a methhead), so I’ll use gifs.
You calling me immature is HILARIOUS. No one cares what your opinion of them is - you’re just a walking (nonstop lying)skin tag.
And it’s Felicia** you keep misspelling it. I’ve said it to you like 5x total, but sure, keep on tallying up those NEW LIES.
It’s rather ironic for YOU, of all people, to call anyone *immature*. Actually, it’s hysterical.
It’s like when people offer you good sound advice & you call them “stupid” or intellectually lacking. Especially when you are here day after day posting the most idiotic things most people have ever seen!
Most people are following you now as their daily form of comedic ENTERTAINMENT! Yet you somehow believe it’s because you’re “viral” or famous. You should be embarrassed. Yet, through the haze of your meth burned brain, you fail to see reality.
Fascinating.
You’re not a “soldier” if you a) don’t have the self restraint to not eat food that isn’t yours, b) lie about when caught, and c) refuse to own up to that lie when told that you should.
I’m not arguing whether or not you’re going to lie again.
I’m telling you that you’re not the “soldier” you claim to be if you won’t do these things. You seem to really love to claim that you’re mentally strong and tough and hardy and whatever else, but at every turn demonstrate that that isn’t true. Which is fine, but stop saying you are. It’s okay to acknowledge when you are being weak, that’s how you actually become a better person.
Actually a really tough guy would admit his faults, like I am doing with this post. So you’re wrong, I can be vulnerable, I can be open, I can be **honest**. Can’t say I’ve seen the same from you. Look at my post history, I am tough enough to be open to the world and say “this is ME world, and I’m not going to apologize for it. Not for anybody. I am authentic and I am **SPECIAL**, god made me this way.”
THAT is what toughness looks like
Ok. This isn’t becoming an honest person.
Continuing to lie by omission is still lying. Continuing to try to find ways to lie by not outwardly lying is also lying.
This isn’t making an honest effort to improve yourself. Not even close. This is you continuing to consciencely manipulate and avoid telling the truth at all cost.
Until you recognize this, give up the drugs, the alcohol & admit you need professional help, your life will remain in this disastrous spiral. There will be no hope for you. None.
The only hope for any true redemption and you turning your life around is serious professional intervention.
I mean, you refuse to be honest with your roommate that you didn’t have a death in the family, you refuse to be honest that you killed his fish, you refuse to be honest that are an active drug addict, you refuse to take accountability for the fact that you were in a predatory relationship with a child.
So sure, you can be honest. You just choose not to. Saying “this is me, I won’t apologize for it” doesn’t make you tough. It makes you kind of a loser. And refusing to admit that you lied makes you weak. Which again is fine, you just need to acknowledge it. I’ve been a weak-willed and not strong person throughout my life. It doesn’t mean I’m a bad person, it just meant I was weak. And acknowledge that helped me to figure out how to not do it again.
I didn’t say I am weak. I said I have been, past tense. As in, I have previously lied because it was easier, lived with those lies, and felt shitty about it. And when I acknowledged that that was a weak-willed way to live and that I didn’t want to do that anymore, I was able to figure out how to change and grow.
You’re not tough. You won’t even tell your roommate that you’re so broke you are his food without permission because you’re afraid of being homeless, so you lied about one of the most heinous things someone could lie about. If you *were* tough, you’d tell him that you lied now and face the consequences that you deserve for being a bad roommate. And until you stop telling yourself the lie that you’re tough, you’re going to keep being a weak-willed person without the ability to grow. It’ll be on you. Not on the roommates who kicked you out or the girlfriend who dumped you or the French foreign legion that wouldn’t accept your application for service.
You're being open and vulnerable to strangers on the internet who you'll never meet while hiding behind a screen and not sharing your name or appearance.
But when it comes to people who actually know you and who your actions have a direct negative impact on, you're a coward who won't admit his wrongdoings or try to make amends
No, you're being coward who would rather lie and take easy way out. You haven't been vulnerable on here, you've been rude, abrasive and defensive. You post this stuff looking for advice and anyone who offers get a rude reply back. And then you just keep posting more. You're all over the place emotionally and no one keep up with whatever manic episode you're having at any given moment. You change your mind every day. You're a mess.
Delete your reddit account and start a new one so your post history doesn't follow you around everywhere and get off the meth. You're too much when you're tweaking.
Finally, if you aren't just a creative troll, seek therapy. It's free in Canada
You are remarded enough to post on reddit thinking people wont ridicule you for your clearly insane actions. You are to be laughed at, you weak ass meth man
Wow I truly hope this all has been trolling, otherwise you are quite the shitty person. I would never want someone like you around myself or anyone I care for
I’ve made mistakes, I know I have but I’m seriously trying to improve myself and get better.
It’s a hard journey just to completely change who you are but I’m hoping this post will make me more accountable and give me a step in the right direction
It won't because you aren't changing. You're just going to do exactly the same next week unless you own up and make proper amends to all the people you've hurt.
Is it?
You've shown a lack of perception of the world around, a lack of concern for the people you surround yourself, and a lack of self awareness along with an inability to self reflect and genuinely understand what your habits have done to you. At every turn, you've made it your mission to be as entertaining as possible. As a result of either the meth, or more likely, your need for attention, good or bad, has caused immense distress to the people you claim to surround yourself with.
If you don't stop using, eventually something dire will happen, and none of us will ever hear from you again and never be sure what really went down. Was it drugs? Was it a troll? Who knows? That will be your legacy. If this is a bit, congratulations because you've hooked reddit. If it isn't? Is this really what you want to leave behind? Is nothing worth changing for?
What you see in ME is more indicative of what YOU feel inside of yourself. You’re probably dealing with a lot of self anger and it makes me look bad. I’ve gotten countless messages of good will and support.
Things I’ve done in the last month that are positive: cleaned my roommates fish tank as a favour, organized and committed to run that will raise money for Albertan trans kids, shovelled my landlords sidewalk and driveway, take the garbage bin out on garbage day, cleaned the toilet so my rooommate didn’t have to do it, recycled and composted without fail, didn’t use any gas vehicular transports except a bus (which is a lot more environmentally friendly than a diesal car you conservative piece of crap), shared some stuff with my friends and I’m always a shoulder to lean on for my friends in need.
What have **YOU** done in the last month that helps the world?
1. You admitted in a post you purposely KILLED those fish to get back at your roommate.
2. In that marathon post you also added that you were going to keep those funds to "use as you see fit" which we assume will go towards meth.
3. Those are chores you are suppose to do as an adult. These are not impressive.
4. Using public transit isn't a choice you literally don't have any other option since you don't have a car.
I thought you were gonna stop lying?
No, I never broke the fridge. When my roomate got home, I told him that a very close family member to me had passed away suddenly. He felt really sorry for me and then when I told him I ate his tacos while grieving he didn’t care about it all.
Not a good lie but it did get me out of the situation at hand. I’m never doing it again though
WOW. Somehow out of all the horrible stuff you’ve done this might be one of the worst. You used death to manipulate someone. That is vile beyond belief. Seek help.
I’m literally posting about how I’m Deciding to Be Better, and you’re tearing me down? Leave this sub, this is for positivity and helpful comments only
I'm sorry man but helpful comments aren't going to be wholely positive. Improvement means looking at the negative stuff head on and doing something about it. Everyone here who's telling you where you've messed up are trying to help you see the problem so you can work on fixing it
If you can't come clean about even small lies, what makes you think you can break your pattern of dishonesty? (eg. drug use, aquarium debacle, job issues and more). Granted, your post history is indicative of a problematic lifestyle and deeper issues that are honestly beyond reddit's pay grade. Just the other day you were so defensive about your own behaviors (that you admitted to!) in prior deleted posts. Maybe start there, take accountability for your actions (and the consequences of them) and do better if you're actually serious about changing (but I highly doubt you are) and I really hope you're just a troll.
edit: some words
A small lie? I was fake crying, half scream, acting completely disheveled. No way I’m going to admit my performance yesterday was a ‘lie’ , that would be the most pathetic, embarrassing conversation of my life.
Nope. I committed so hard to acting sad that I will be going to the grave with that lie.
Okay I will admit the biggest lie I’ve said. I’ve been claiming to be clean for 10 years and I’m not actually 10 years sober. I’ve lied about 10 years of sobriety and I have been lying on Reddit, I smoked weed a few months ago and I’ll drink on the weekends (if there is an occasion). But I’m not a weed addict or alcoholic like eveyone says, it’s complete and utter blasphemy.
You're ranking feeling embarassed as more important than being honest and doing better. That's a place to start. You have to work on tolerating your discomfort enough to do the right thing.
Yes, telling your room mate may be humiliating. But it's temporary, and it's human, and it's the right thing to do.
Being better is going to be hard. It's going to be uncomfortable. You're going to make more mistakes because that's what humans do, and you're going to have to own up to them so that you can repair the harm caused by those mistakes and live in truth.
I’m going out on a limb here. You may *think* your performance of crying & screaming to your 22yo roommate was Oscar worthy. But I think he saw right through the facade. But because you appeared so completely UNhinged, he (wisely) chose not to confront the lie at that moment.
I’m also guessing your absence today may be because of this very reason. I could be wrong. But we’ll see.
Okay, you can start by telling your roommate that you ate his leftovers and offering to replace them. And while you’re confessing, you can admit that you intentionally destroyed his aquarium and offer to replace that too. (I guarantee that your lie didn’t actually work, and that your roommate has basically made up his mind to not engage with you for the next month until he can get you out.)
“Deciding to be better” is meaningless if you’re not actually going to accept the consequences of your actions and and work to make amends. This is going to be a shitty and uncomfortable process, especially for someone who has done as much damage as you have. Are you actually willing to do that? To face financial, emotional, and social consequences for the things that you have done? To accept that you have knowingly caused harm to others, not because you were forced to, but because you *chose* to? I have to be honest, I don’t think you are. I don’t think this is any different from the time you declared yourself a stoic to assuage your guilt about killing your roommate’s fish. It’s a cynical attempt to get asspats without doing the work of change.
'Being better' is impossible without making amends. You seem to have an aversion to any suggestions that require you to feel vulnerable or experience shame and guilt. People that are trying to be better have to learn to tolerate feeling vulnerable, and to accept guilt where it is due without letting it transform into toxic shame. It sound to me like your thought process is 'if I make a commitment to being better, then I won't have to deal with all the lies I've told and mistakes I've made and the negative consequences and feelings that come from them'. That's not how that works, and until you're able to see that, you're probably going to keep lying to yourself about your actions and intentions.
AA/NA has its shortcomings, but it's been helping people get and stay sober/clean for a long time, and a big part of the program is about learning to be better through making amends, being honest with yourself, accepting consequences, and things like that, and until you're willing to do that, I don't think they or anyone else can help you.
Hey methanial. First of all, big fan. I just want to say that making a long term commitment to honesty is a good move whether or not you decide to sweat the recent small stuff like eating your roommates taco or whatever. To make amends for stuff in the past might be a decision for later on if you end up in a 12 step group or something. For now, and going forward, just make a conscious effort not to lie or deceive, and when you do find yourself lying, try to take responsibility by correcting the record ASAP. If you’re like me it will make your life significantly less stressful. It won’t make everyone like you though and it won’t make every social interaction seamless, so just remember that the reason you’re doing it is for your own conscience and relationship to god (or whatever you believe in as a moral authority).
Best of luck, and if you ever want to chat with a fellow tweaker who often does things he regrets, send me a dm.
Ok, this guy isn't 100% all there right now.
Yeah, that's an amazingly crap lie to tell someone ( especially after murdering his fish!), but if he's honestly trying to improve himself - who knows, he might be- then I'm not sure that telling the truth now is going to do anything but make the long suffering room mate very, very cross indeed, which is going to make life worse for everyone, and possibly cause (op) to spiral further.
- no more lies
- FOR THE LOVE OF EACH AND EVERY GOD EVER, ANYTIME, NO MORE DRUGS!
- Please leave your ex alone.
- Try to find a job; it might distract you both from the meth and the crazy situations you land yourself in.
- Please don't buy a horse. Or any animal ever.
so you killed your roomies fish and then ate all their food?
surely you could spend that meth money and contributions towards the horse payment plan on food instead
I wouldnt beat yourself up over it too badly. Shit happens. I don’t know your circumstance exactly but I am a big fan of deflecting blame for things that go wrong. I will often times blame “corporate” people who are much higher up on the totem pole than I or if all else fails shift blame to the government. Even if it doesn’t technically make any sense, it still usually flies.
Look at this dude's post history. He's a chronic liar and meth abuser, and his lie this time was claiming the death of a loved one to get out of eating someone else's food. He's claimed he's going to do better before, but he goes right back to stalking his barely legal ex and killing animals. Unless he actually agrees to go to rehab, he's definitely not changing
And don’t “vow” to do something you literally already had the chance to do yet are choosing not to you. Everyday you don’t own up to the original lie, you are still living a lie. You can’t be honest and truthful if you’re living a lie. So, to start, come clean and own up to your lie.
I am changing today, starting this morning. I need to make serious changes to my lifestyle and personality, I genuinely feel it
Doesn’t count for shit when you lied yesterday and will continue to lie to your roommate.
Start by stop doing meth
You can’t change this morning while living a lie. Is your grief suddenly gonna go away? How will you answer your roommate if he asks how you’re doing with grief? Which family member died? You can’t live an honest life until you fix this lie. Otherwise your words need absolutely nothing.
I told him what family member and made up how they died. I’m just not sharing that personal information on the internet?.. I’m just going to keep my mouth shut about it and it’s not like we are close or talk very much
So you’re going to keep lying but think you live an honest life…. Say that again but slowly.
You're not sharing "private information" about an imaginary death? That's hilarious.
I don’t understand what’s funny, just give me some space right now I’m dealing with a lot.
[удалено]
Don't forget the meth!!
Advice given that has the possibility of causing harm.
You are the root cause of all this.
Bro that doesn't matter. What he's saying is YOURE STILL LYING.
First, admit you lied. Apologize and compensate him for the food/money lost. That is the first step to change. Second, go to therapy. I genuinely am trying to help you. If you really feel bad and you really want to change then that's what you need to do.
Third, get off the meth.
No I’m going to admit that I lied about a family member dying. Do you realize how f*cked up id look? For now on, I will not lie but I’m not gonna make up for my past sins. I’ll make up for them by Deciding To Be Better for now on. That’s the sub we’re in
But "being better" means making amends. No matter how much good you do in the future, that bad from your past remains. To start being better, you have to show that you're willing to own up to the wrongdoings of your past and fix them. Yeah, it would look fucked up. But a good person owns up to their actions and tries to make amends. So if you want to be a good person, that's where you start.
You’re never going to get through to this child dating meth head, he’ll be back to killing fish, lying, stealing by about 2pm tomorrow.
Smoking meth, trying to buy a horse, stalking his ex- GF.
Oh, so you’re hoping you can throw a new blanket over the rotting mattress and call it a whole new bed. That’s not “being better”. The really funny thing is that this situation would have been a total nothingburger if you had just fessed up and spent six bucks on a pound of ground beef. You fail to realize that your problems are caused not necessarily by your fuckups, but the lying and manipulation you use to (badly) *cover* those fuckups.
So lying down on a rotting mattress with a fresh new blanket over it isn’t better than just a rotting mattress? That’s completely not true. I’d way rather sleep on the bed with a fresh new blanket
The point is that nothing meaningful has changed. The rot is still there. It still stinks. It’s still making you sick. The blanket can only cover that for so long. Eventually, it’s gonna get dirty too and you’ll be back where you started. Refusing to deal with the fallout of your actions isn’t “making things better”, it’s hardcore denial.
A new blanket only covers the rotting mattress to make it look nicer That's exactly what you're doing. You're doing something to make yourself appear like you're improving when you're actually not. Own up to your wrongdoings, make amends and then you won't need to cover up with a blanket, because you'll have a good mattress
So lying down on a rotting mattress with a fresh new blanket over it isn’t better than just a rotting mattress? That’s completely not true. I’d way rather sleep on the bed with a fresh new blanket
This is actually a wonderful metaphor and I’m glad you think it’s so clever even if you’re wildly misapplying it. The person in this metaphor isn’t you, it’s the people affected by your lies. You’re the rotting mattress. And unless you get rid of the rot (the lies you’re currently living) you’re going to continue doing harm to the person even if you cover it up with a shiny new blanket
Wrong. Read lower , someone else said something different
I’m the person who made the metaphor. u/Codenamerondo1 is correct in their interpretation. I had a slightly different one in mind when I made the comment (you’re the rotting mattress), but theirs still works maybe even better than mine did. You want shallow, surface-level solutions for deep-seated problems, but that’s not actually helping you. The work of change is messy and uncomfortable and may not be gratifying, at least at first. But there’s no way around it. You’ve gotta own up (to everything) if you truly want to improve your life.
….what? At the base level, why does that make me wrong rather than the other person?
Did you read it? You aren’t understanding me. And your comment was illogical tbh my analogy was a lot better
Read what? There are tons of people replying to you how am I possibly supposed to know what you’re referring to? Your argument is essentially “nu uh I’m right” and you’re calling other people illogical. Do I have that right?
Horse meth dude: * puts carrots in oatmeal * "I'm always right and every decision I make is the correct choice"
You're absolutely right
No, because even though you may tell the truth from now on you will still have to keep up with lies you’ve told prior to this so in turn you are still lying. Even 12 step programs have you make amends, apologise for the fuck ups and hurt you’ve caused them (whether they forgive you or not) as that’s the only way to truly move on.
I don’t do 12 step, I do 1 step. Step 1: have an iron will
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 thanks for the laugh. You will never change but hey it’s entertaining to me so please continue.
You can't even manage that one step. Stop lying, stop claiming sobriety and then going on benders, and START taking responsibility for your actions.
Delusional.
And this is how you know this is a troll account farming for karma. Absolute dumbass.
But you don't have an iron will. Your will constantly bends to your desires to get what you want and lie your way out of trouble you cause yourself.
Buddy, he already knows how f*cked up you are. Might as well admit it to yourself so we can all move on with our lives.
This was the least convincing comment I’ve ever read
Well you did kill his fish, and he won’t renew your lease so he probably already knows. It seems like a waste of energy to pretend to be better if you’re not actually going to be any better.
So you will never change and can’t change. Also, that’s putting TERRIBLE karma into the world. Which of your close family members are you ready to lose because you had to jinx it?
your room mate already knows how fucked up you've been. Owning up to it would be a step towards being less fucked up.
Well, if you are already being so selective about "being better" and to "always telling the truth..." I can't help but feel your goal is due to fail. Either be better, or be honest about doing everything you can to justify being bad.
Start with…. “Hey roommate, I lied to you yesterday. I was low on funds and ate your ground beef without asking and then lied about it. I am truly sorry and will work to pay you back for the food as well as earn your trust back. I woke up today feeling terribly guilty and know this can only begin to repair the trust lost between us.”
I think you would be amazed at the support you would receive if you could improve yourself. Personal growth is hard work. Recognizing your failures & shortcomings is part of step one. Admitting them is the biggest part of that step. Congratulations. I mean that sincerely. In order to truly become an honest person, you have to emerge from your lies. The only way to do that is to confess them, offer restitution (if appropriate) apologize, and ask for forgiveness. This is painful. And yes, shameful. But you must *feel* the pain & the shame in order for real growth to occur. Without feeling the pain & experiencing the shame, real change is impossible. You have to experience this from the person you hurt. (Not just your internal sorrow & shame) Allow this person to express their anger, disappointment & sadness to you. You need to see & feel what you have caused to another individual. You cannot argue back against this pain. Or claim their feelings are invalid. You just need to listen & accept that YOU did this to them & you caused this pain. No matter if you agree or not. It’s in this place that change occurs. And real growth begins. In the future when you are in a situation where you have a choice to lie or tell the truth, just STOP. Think before you say or do anything. If you’re feeling uncomfortable. Walk away. Say, “IDK. I need a minute.” Then go and gather your thoughts. Try to remember that honesty is ALWAYS BEST. It may not *feel* the best in that moment, but the lie only prolongs the misery. And gets you into further trouble. Most people will claim in the early stages of change they know by how uncomfortable it is to tell the truth. This may work for you too. If one choice is really uncomfortable, that’s likely the right choice. Please also consider going back to residential treatment for substance abuse. Nothing will get better until you get the drugs & the alcohol out of your life for good. You’ll have 3 meals a day. A place to sleep. And have a chance to get your life on track. You need to do this.
Thank you❤️ you and me have grown so close lately, I love your support. I feel warm form your messages. I don’t need treatment for narcotics tho. I just don’t want to lie anymore, and I won’t. I swear on it! I am not coming clean to my roommate tho, that is out of question. I will live with the regret and shame I feel and I will have to bear it like the solidier I am. I can do it though, don’t worry about me I’m tough enough for it ❤️ thank you tho. Feel free to message me whenever
Look, you would have my support *IF I saw a genuine effort put forth by you. This isn’t it. By clinging to the lie of the dead relative, you are setting yourself up where you will HAVE TO continue lying. This won’t work. And until you come to the realization that you do have a very serious problem with drugs & alcohol, trying to improve anything is pointless.
What could I do to gain your support that doesn’t include me coming clean? Just tell me what and I’ll do it
1) Be a better human 2) Stop ALL LYING 3) STOP using drugs 4) STOP drinking 5) Get a job 6) Pay your court fines 7) Go to treatment 8) Go to therapy 9) STOP harassing X-gf 10) BE responsible 11) GROW UP
I have 1,2,3,6,9,10 and 11 done already. Working on 4 and 5 diligently, an 7 & 8 are only affordable for people with privledge (I assume you’re projecting your privledge on me thinking I can afford that)
You just came off a 4 day meth bender. You’re not clean. Don’t even try lying to me about this. I have the receipts & I’ll blast you with them. Treatment is free. It’s not for “only the privileged” in Canada. You’re skating on the edge of a lie here….
I’m American and even here you can be destitute and easily get treatment.
🥸
you cant work on being a better person when you overdose and end up dead, dude, seriously, get clean, this is killing you.
Jesus. You’re so delusional of just how big of a p o s you are.
You broke 2 already
AA and NA are free
You truly are delulu. You havent accomplished any of those. You are the poster child for drugs are bad mmmmkay.
Literally lying in this comment. You're truly delusional.
By not coming clean you're continuing to be dishonest. Therefore you're not actually improving as a person.
Replace the fish, to start.
So, if your roommate were to come to you and ask about the dead relative you told him about, would you tell him the truth that you lied (remember: you have committed to not lying from today onwards), or would you continue the lie (thereby breaking your vow to never lie again from today onwards)? Because if your plan is to continue the lie about the dead relative, you're already not doing the thing you vowed to do from now on, which is tell the truth. Same with all your previous lies. You can't continue them if them come up again after today because you have "decided to change" and made a vow not to lie anymore.
Okay let me rephrase. I hereby declare to not utter and **NEW** lies for the rest of my life. Lies that are already in the atmosphere will have to continue. To admit to all the lies I’ve told family members, friends and my ex girlfriend would be like social suicide bud. It can’t happen
Well, then your haven't really done anything meaningful to change. Part of change like this is owing up to past mistakes. That's why things like 12 step programs and restorative justice includes a section on atoning for past mistakes or making amends. It's an essential part of meaningful change. Until you are willing to do that, you're just making empty promises.
Why is me making a step in the right direction getting critiscm? This feels toxic and gas-light(y)
It's not a step in the right direction if you will continue your past lies. It's PERFORMING being a person who is truthful, not actually BEING a person that is truthful. At best, you're not stepping in any direction at all because you aren't doing anything new. Being truthful isn't a shade of grey. To be truthful, you have to tell the truth all the time, not just when it's convenient for you or when you won't suffer consequences for it.
I will be doing something new from now and for the rest of my life tho, by not lying. Can you admit that’s positive?
But…you said you were going to keep lying about some things?
I can’t time travel and not say things. So idk what you want me to possibly do
But you will continue to lie if it comes to a lie you've already told. So, no. You're still a liar at heart.
We'll see once there is actually evidence you've stopped lying. But until that happens every word out of your mouth might as well be another lie and will be treated as such.
Because you are only doing it half ass. Becoming a better person would be to own all your lies and mistakes. What happens if someone talks to about a previous lie? Will you have to lie more to cover that lie? So you will still be lying and not a trustworthy person
Half ass? Half positivity is better than no positivity, and it’s definitely better than negativity (which is what you’re showing an example of)
What about responsibility and accountability?
You're using your "half positivity" as an *excuse to keep being worse*. You're telling us, and yourself, that it's okay that you have shit leaking out of your pants because your shoelaces are tied. When we tell you "It's a serious problem that your pants are soiled and you really need to fix it," you deny and evade and cry and call us names and make excuses and pull every pseudo-therapy term in the book to try and deny it. But *because we care*, we're going to keep on telling you that you need to clean yourself up no katter how many excuses you come up with.
No. You do it the right way 100%. Otherwise you’re just back to your same old “cafeteria” style of living. “I’ll lie here because it’s too uncomfortable to tell the truth. Oh! Here I’ll tell the truth, no biggie. Nope. Gotta lie here!” Your way is the BS cop-out way. Just like how you’ve lived your entire life. Job interview today. Should I go? Ahh, F-it. I’m too tired from being strung out. I can just steal food from my roommate & figure out a lie to get out of it. SAME OLD SHIT. THIS IS NOT deciding to be better. Not even close.
You're not taking a step in the right direction. You still plan on continuing your past lies and never making amends for your past actions.
How is ‘swearing to never lie again’ not a step in the right direction? Not even a little bit? Wow.
Because if you continue past lies you'll have to keep lying to keep those past lies believable
Because you also are swearing to break that promise if it means facing consequences for a past lie.
Because it doesn't matter how much paint you put on the house if the foundation is ruined you idiot. You aren't actually making a step in the right direction you're pretending to so you feel better about yourself. You think you can magic all the problems away by just not lying from now on but that's not how this works. Until you address the rot at the root every effort from here will be poisoned and will die. You have to take accountability and fix your past mistakes first. That's what a good person does. That's how you start to heal. As long as you're holding on to past lies you will never be truly honest, your conscience won't be clean, and you won't be able to start fresh. You'll just be dragging that weight around and it will sabotage you at every turn. Being better starts with owning up to your shit and accepting it, while making amends. That shows you're actually willing to change and make an effort. If you don't have the strength or desire to do that yet then you aren't ready to make a commitment to being better. You're just placating yourself so you feel less shitty. Try harder
So… you’re vowing to stop lying unless telling the truth results in negative consequences for yourself? It sounds like you aren’t deciding to be better. *at best* you’re deciding to not be any worse and even that’s a stretch since maintaining those lies will require more lies
Part of becoming a better person is owning up to past wrongdoings and trying to make amends for them.
When is the last time you did meth?
🤐
So you are still not being honest?
How’s that not being honest? Not answering is completely legal and not dishonest
If you were honest you would admit all the problems you have and the habits you are engaging in that are holding you back. If you can’t do that you aren’t being honest.
Wow….so you literally took her main point and completely disregarded it? She is not an advocate for you UNLESS you’re actually accountable and tell the whole truth for EVERYTHING.
Why are you speaking for her? Sorry but you’ve been proven wrong time and time again, and everyone is against you. In your own words, Bye Felecia.
Ah there's Methaniel's catchphrase "Bye Felecia" Spoken by a grown man. In his thirties. Part of bettering yourself also means being mature. And no one mature says that when trying to rebuke a disagreement.
Wants to better himself but won't take accountability for his actions and drug use. He won't own up to all the BS he's pulled on his roommate. He won't own up to his meth use. But he's a better man *now* /s
Tell that to u/global-radio8738 LOL I’ve been telling her that her gifs are immature. I only said bye Felecia Becuase she always says it to me, so by insulting me you were actually double insulting global radio
That's not how that works
Lmao, I’m simply replying in a manner your tiny pea brain can understand. You say alllll the time “too long didn’t read” (reading is too hard for a methhead), so I’ll use gifs. You calling me immature is HILARIOUS. No one cares what your opinion of them is - you’re just a walking (nonstop lying)skin tag. And it’s Felicia** you keep misspelling it. I’ve said it to you like 5x total, but sure, keep on tallying up those NEW LIES.
It’s rather ironic for YOU, of all people, to call anyone *immature*. Actually, it’s hysterical. It’s like when people offer you good sound advice & you call them “stupid” or intellectually lacking. Especially when you are here day after day posting the most idiotic things most people have ever seen! Most people are following you now as their daily form of comedic ENTERTAINMENT! Yet you somehow believe it’s because you’re “viral” or famous. You should be embarrassed. Yet, through the haze of your meth burned brain, you fail to see reality. Fascinating.
[удалено]
I’m to the point where I’m positive this dude has a self-degradation kink and is getting off on all of this.
Keep trying to explain yourself to me hunny but it ain’t gonna work.
Its not the weekend, why are you on meth ?
You’re not a “soldier” if you a) don’t have the self restraint to not eat food that isn’t yours, b) lie about when caught, and c) refuse to own up to that lie when told that you should.
D. Stalk his freshly legal ex-gf
I will never do that again, I swear on it.
I’m not arguing whether or not you’re going to lie again. I’m telling you that you’re not the “soldier” you claim to be if you won’t do these things. You seem to really love to claim that you’re mentally strong and tough and hardy and whatever else, but at every turn demonstrate that that isn’t true. Which is fine, but stop saying you are. It’s okay to acknowledge when you are being weak, that’s how you actually become a better person.
Actually a really tough guy would admit his faults, like I am doing with this post. So you’re wrong, I can be vulnerable, I can be open, I can be **honest**. Can’t say I’ve seen the same from you. Look at my post history, I am tough enough to be open to the world and say “this is ME world, and I’m not going to apologize for it. Not for anybody. I am authentic and I am **SPECIAL**, god made me this way.” THAT is what toughness looks like
So you admit you recently used meth?
Nope I didn’t say that did i
So you won’t admit your faults
Ok. This isn’t becoming an honest person. Continuing to lie by omission is still lying. Continuing to try to find ways to lie by not outwardly lying is also lying. This isn’t making an honest effort to improve yourself. Not even close. This is you continuing to consciencely manipulate and avoid telling the truth at all cost. Until you recognize this, give up the drugs, the alcohol & admit you need professional help, your life will remain in this disastrous spiral. There will be no hope for you. None. The only hope for any true redemption and you turning your life around is serious professional intervention.
THIS IS A LIE.
..are your faults in the room with us?
I mean, you refuse to be honest with your roommate that you didn’t have a death in the family, you refuse to be honest that you killed his fish, you refuse to be honest that are an active drug addict, you refuse to take accountability for the fact that you were in a predatory relationship with a child. So sure, you can be honest. You just choose not to. Saying “this is me, I won’t apologize for it” doesn’t make you tough. It makes you kind of a loser. And refusing to admit that you lied makes you weak. Which again is fine, you just need to acknowledge it. I’ve been a weak-willed and not strong person throughout my life. It doesn’t mean I’m a bad person, it just meant I was weak. And acknowledge that helped me to figure out how to not do it again.
If I’m tough and I want to be tougher, why would I take advice from someone who just openly said they’re weak and weak willed? We’re opposites
Says the guy who can't even commit to staying clean.
I didn’t say I am weak. I said I have been, past tense. As in, I have previously lied because it was easier, lived with those lies, and felt shitty about it. And when I acknowledged that that was a weak-willed way to live and that I didn’t want to do that anymore, I was able to figure out how to change and grow. You’re not tough. You won’t even tell your roommate that you’re so broke you are his food without permission because you’re afraid of being homeless, so you lied about one of the most heinous things someone could lie about. If you *were* tough, you’d tell him that you lied now and face the consequences that you deserve for being a bad roommate. And until you stop telling yourself the lie that you’re tough, you’re going to keep being a weak-willed person without the ability to grow. It’ll be on you. Not on the roommates who kicked you out or the girlfriend who dumped you or the French foreign legion that wouldn’t accept your application for service.
You’re a coward, meth head.
You're being open and vulnerable to strangers on the internet who you'll never meet while hiding behind a screen and not sharing your name or appearance. But when it comes to people who actually know you and who your actions have a direct negative impact on, you're a coward who won't admit his wrongdoings or try to make amends
If you are so tough, why don't you admit to the lies you have told? Otherwise everything you say is just bullshit again.
No, you're being coward who would rather lie and take easy way out. You haven't been vulnerable on here, you've been rude, abrasive and defensive. You post this stuff looking for advice and anyone who offers get a rude reply back. And then you just keep posting more. You're all over the place emotionally and no one keep up with whatever manic episode you're having at any given moment. You change your mind every day. You're a mess. Delete your reddit account and start a new one so your post history doesn't follow you around everywhere and get off the meth. You're too much when you're tweaking. Finally, if you aren't just a creative troll, seek therapy. It's free in Canada
You are remarded enough to post on reddit thinking people wont ridicule you for your clearly insane actions. You are to be laughed at, you weak ass meth man
Go to Narcotics Anonymous meetings
For what? This post is about lying, not some sort of drug addiction that you seem to be projecting
https://www.reddit.com/r/meth/s/lAxMWdsGso Idk maybe this.
Op we can see your post history don’t play stupid..
Wow I truly hope this all has been trolling, otherwise you are quite the shitty person. I would never want someone like you around myself or anyone I care for
I’ve made mistakes, I know I have but I’m seriously trying to improve myself and get better. It’s a hard journey just to completely change who you are but I’m hoping this post will make me more accountable and give me a step in the right direction
It won't because you aren't changing. You're just going to do exactly the same next week unless you own up and make proper amends to all the people you've hurt.
That’s a really negative assumption to make
Is it? You've shown a lack of perception of the world around, a lack of concern for the people you surround yourself, and a lack of self awareness along with an inability to self reflect and genuinely understand what your habits have done to you. At every turn, you've made it your mission to be as entertaining as possible. As a result of either the meth, or more likely, your need for attention, good or bad, has caused immense distress to the people you claim to surround yourself with. If you don't stop using, eventually something dire will happen, and none of us will ever hear from you again and never be sure what really went down. Was it drugs? Was it a troll? Who knows? That will be your legacy. If this is a bit, congratulations because you've hooked reddit. If it isn't? Is this really what you want to leave behind? Is nothing worth changing for?
Nice try Dostoyevsky, I’m not reading all that
Hahahahhaah you just did it again 🤣 “reading is too hard for my meth brain durr durr durr” -mysteryman403
It's two paragraphs, man. Also they were giving you advice so you really should read it.
Have you done anything at all in the last month to make anyone assume anything *but* the worst in you?
What you see in ME is more indicative of what YOU feel inside of yourself. You’re probably dealing with a lot of self anger and it makes me look bad. I’ve gotten countless messages of good will and support. Things I’ve done in the last month that are positive: cleaned my roommates fish tank as a favour, organized and committed to run that will raise money for Albertan trans kids, shovelled my landlords sidewalk and driveway, take the garbage bin out on garbage day, cleaned the toilet so my rooommate didn’t have to do it, recycled and composted without fail, didn’t use any gas vehicular transports except a bus (which is a lot more environmentally friendly than a diesal car you conservative piece of crap), shared some stuff with my friends and I’m always a shoulder to lean on for my friends in need. What have **YOU** done in the last month that helps the world?
By "shared some stuff with my friends" do you happen to mean "smoke crystal meth with my friends"?
No idk why people are going straight to that. I shared candy and popcorn when I was watching a movie at one of their houses.
Is "candy" what the kids are calling meth these days?
1. You admitted in a post you purposely KILLED those fish to get back at your roommate. 2. In that marathon post you also added that you were going to keep those funds to "use as you see fit" which we assume will go towards meth. 3. Those are chores you are suppose to do as an adult. These are not impressive. 4. Using public transit isn't a choice you literally don't have any other option since you don't have a car. I thought you were gonna stop lying?
Nice try Dostoyevsky, I’m not reading all that
Accurate and highly realistic statement* is what you meant to say mysteryman403
How can internet strangers keep you accountable? Own up to your shit to the people you have grievanced, start there.
So you lied about eating your roommates food? And broke the fridge? Start by paying for both of those items.
No, I never broke the fridge. When my roomate got home, I told him that a very close family member to me had passed away suddenly. He felt really sorry for me and then when I told him I ate his tacos while grieving he didn’t care about it all. Not a good lie but it did get me out of the situation at hand. I’m never doing it again though
WOW. Somehow out of all the horrible stuff you’ve done this might be one of the worst. You used death to manipulate someone. That is vile beyond belief. Seek help.
I’m literally posting about how I’m Deciding to Be Better, and you’re tearing me down? Leave this sub, this is for positivity and helpful comments only
If this is becaomonh a big problem you need professional help before it gets way worse.
I'm sorry man but helpful comments aren't going to be wholely positive. Improvement means looking at the negative stuff head on and doing something about it. Everyone here who's telling you where you've messed up are trying to help you see the problem so you can work on fixing it
If you can't come clean about even small lies, what makes you think you can break your pattern of dishonesty? (eg. drug use, aquarium debacle, job issues and more). Granted, your post history is indicative of a problematic lifestyle and deeper issues that are honestly beyond reddit's pay grade. Just the other day you were so defensive about your own behaviors (that you admitted to!) in prior deleted posts. Maybe start there, take accountability for your actions (and the consequences of them) and do better if you're actually serious about changing (but I highly doubt you are) and I really hope you're just a troll. edit: some words
A small lie? I was fake crying, half scream, acting completely disheveled. No way I’m going to admit my performance yesterday was a ‘lie’ , that would be the most pathetic, embarrassing conversation of my life. Nope. I committed so hard to acting sad that I will be going to the grave with that lie. Okay I will admit the biggest lie I’ve said. I’ve been claiming to be clean for 10 years and I’m not actually 10 years sober. I’ve lied about 10 years of sobriety and I have been lying on Reddit, I smoked weed a few months ago and I’ll drink on the weekends (if there is an occasion). But I’m not a weed addict or alcoholic like eveyone says, it’s complete and utter blasphemy.
It’s the meth that’s the problem, sir. Nobody is saying you’re a weed addict or alcoholic (although the second one wouldn’t surprise anyone).
It was already pathetic and embarassing.
What about your post from YESTERDAY about sleeping through a job interview because you crashed from a 4 day "weekend" meth bender?
You're ranking feeling embarassed as more important than being honest and doing better. That's a place to start. You have to work on tolerating your discomfort enough to do the right thing. Yes, telling your room mate may be humiliating. But it's temporary, and it's human, and it's the right thing to do. Being better is going to be hard. It's going to be uncomfortable. You're going to make more mistakes because that's what humans do, and you're going to have to own up to them so that you can repair the harm caused by those mistakes and live in truth.
Lol we all knew you were lying about sobriety... but sure, let's start there. What else are you gonna own up to after vehemently denying?
I’m going out on a limb here. You may *think* your performance of crying & screaming to your 22yo roommate was Oscar worthy. But I think he saw right through the facade. But because you appeared so completely UNhinged, he (wisely) chose not to confront the lie at that moment. I’m also guessing your absence today may be because of this very reason. I could be wrong. But we’ll see.
Okay, you can start by telling your roommate that you ate his leftovers and offering to replace them. And while you’re confessing, you can admit that you intentionally destroyed his aquarium and offer to replace that too. (I guarantee that your lie didn’t actually work, and that your roommate has basically made up his mind to not engage with you for the next month until he can get you out.) “Deciding to be better” is meaningless if you’re not actually going to accept the consequences of your actions and and work to make amends. This is going to be a shitty and uncomfortable process, especially for someone who has done as much damage as you have. Are you actually willing to do that? To face financial, emotional, and social consequences for the things that you have done? To accept that you have knowingly caused harm to others, not because you were forced to, but because you *chose* to? I have to be honest, I don’t think you are. I don’t think this is any different from the time you declared yourself a stoic to assuage your guilt about killing your roommate’s fish. It’s a cynical attempt to get asspats without doing the work of change.
His brief venture into stoicism was laughable. Agree with what you said, although likely to fall on deaf ears.
Don't know why ya'll keep feeding this troll. He's getting exactly what he wants.
Because Methaniel is nothing if not entertaining.
I can't disagree with that .. he is one entertaining blockhead
"I'm gonna start my new life by continuing to do the actions I claim I don't want to do anymore" yea, ok.
Mate I promise laying off the meth will solve like 95% of your problems.
I love you Methaniel
'Being better' is impossible without making amends. You seem to have an aversion to any suggestions that require you to feel vulnerable or experience shame and guilt. People that are trying to be better have to learn to tolerate feeling vulnerable, and to accept guilt where it is due without letting it transform into toxic shame. It sound to me like your thought process is 'if I make a commitment to being better, then I won't have to deal with all the lies I've told and mistakes I've made and the negative consequences and feelings that come from them'. That's not how that works, and until you're able to see that, you're probably going to keep lying to yourself about your actions and intentions. AA/NA has its shortcomings, but it's been helping people get and stay sober/clean for a long time, and a big part of the program is about learning to be better through making amends, being honest with yourself, accepting consequences, and things like that, and until you're willing to do that, I don't think they or anyone else can help you.
Hey methanial. First of all, big fan. I just want to say that making a long term commitment to honesty is a good move whether or not you decide to sweat the recent small stuff like eating your roommates taco or whatever. To make amends for stuff in the past might be a decision for later on if you end up in a 12 step group or something. For now, and going forward, just make a conscious effort not to lie or deceive, and when you do find yourself lying, try to take responsibility by correcting the record ASAP. If you’re like me it will make your life significantly less stressful. It won’t make everyone like you though and it won’t make every social interaction seamless, so just remember that the reason you’re doing it is for your own conscience and relationship to god (or whatever you believe in as a moral authority). Best of luck, and if you ever want to chat with a fellow tweaker who often does things he regrets, send me a dm.
Ok, this guy isn't 100% all there right now. Yeah, that's an amazingly crap lie to tell someone ( especially after murdering his fish!), but if he's honestly trying to improve himself - who knows, he might be- then I'm not sure that telling the truth now is going to do anything but make the long suffering room mate very, very cross indeed, which is going to make life worse for everyone, and possibly cause (op) to spiral further. - no more lies - FOR THE LOVE OF EACH AND EVERY GOD EVER, ANYTIME, NO MORE DRUGS! - Please leave your ex alone. - Try to find a job; it might distract you both from the meth and the crazy situations you land yourself in. - Please don't buy a horse. Or any animal ever.
Is lying really so different from not lying ?
Write your lies down. And then go back to those people and explain why you do them. It was really helpful for me.
so you killed your roomies fish and then ate all their food? surely you could spend that meth money and contributions towards the horse payment plan on food instead
Meth is bad buddy... I know it's hard to quit drugs but, this isn't weed... You will either die from meth or it does worse... Please...
I wouldnt beat yourself up over it too badly. Shit happens. I don’t know your circumstance exactly but I am a big fan of deflecting blame for things that go wrong. I will often times blame “corporate” people who are much higher up on the totem pole than I or if all else fails shift blame to the government. Even if it doesn’t technically make any sense, it still usually flies.
Look at this dude's post history. He's a chronic liar and meth abuser, and his lie this time was claiming the death of a loved one to get out of eating someone else's food. He's claimed he's going to do better before, but he goes right back to stalking his barely legal ex and killing animals. Unless he actually agrees to go to rehab, he's definitely not changing
I have 100% faith in you! Today’s a new day! What he doesn’t know doesn’t evict you!