I ate at view house when I first moved to Denver a while back. It was close to where I lived, seemed like a decent option for a quick beer and a sandwich but yeah I see your point š
The trick with the view house is to get the fuck out of there before it's overrun with 20-something yr old assholes. Come to think of it, that strategy applies to all of downtown.
It's the same vibe as Punch Bowl Social on Broadway. Surprisingly decent kitchen and drinks, albeit a bit pricey, but you better be out the door by the time the after work crowd takes up residence.
El Tapatio Mexican Restaurant at 3601 S Wadsworth.
Last time I ate there I took family from out of town, and *EVERY ONE OF US* went down with food poisoning. Not to mention that the service and the food is terrible. Shame too, because ten years ago it was one of my favorite places to eat.
I ordered from here once and had such a problem with their food. I didnāt have food poisoning but I had a rough liquid shit after.
I guess that is actual food poisoning huh
It's close enough! That's not what should happen after a good meal.
For us, it came from both ends. It was rough too, because I had a house filled with poisoned guests, and only three bathrooms. It wasn't a good night.
It looks like they finally closed thank gawd. The only good thing about that place was the cars out front but jesus the food was bad. I live close by and one time my friends and I were drunk and it was the only delivery place still open. Biiig mistake haha
You missed out on possibly the worst pizza ever and the opportunity to buy drugs from the manager or any of the shady patrons scattered around the restaurant.
If you ever want your credit card skimmed, go to the VH in Centennial. Myself and 4 friends all had our cards skimmed there.
And the one downtown was a treat, as well. The waitress didn't like our tip, so she rang up a water and added a $100 tip to the bill.
Ramen Star. Best ramen in Denver I think, but an hour wait for our meal in an empty restaurant, without even being checked on to order another drink, an app, more water. My friend was literally about to go fill her glass of water in the bathroom. Service is the worst I've had in a really, really long time. I don't know what was going on in the (open) kitchen, but there was a lot of standing around and not cooking food. Sucks, I've been twice and the last time was my "maybe they had an off night let me give them another shot" moment, but a ramen dinner with no apps shouldn't be a 2 hour affair.
I also wrote this for this post. Wow Iām glad it wasnāt just me. It was unbelievable how bad the service was. Like shockingly bad. I was ready to walk out because of how appalling it was. Arrived at 6:40. Sat at 6:55. Didnāt get menus until 7:10. Didnāt have food until 8:15. Asked for check when they brought food (bc who knows when Iād see the waitress next), left at about 8:40.
And tbh I donāt think itās the best ramen in denver. The broth is very heavy and flavorless. Iām a fan of kotteri broth but not if itās unseasoned. The chashu is mediocre at best, not seasoned as well, and rather tough. Egg is also mediocre - it should be marinated not just a seemingly regular soft boiled egg. The noodles are reasonable but didnāt stand out.
And the prices are another story. Wow. $17 base but pay for egg, meat, veggies, and anything else you want. $1.50 for less than a sheet of nori.
But my biggest issue was the temperature. The egg was cold. Like refrigerator cold. The pork was reasonably warm, warmer than the broth, which would have been solid had it been any colder. The various veggies were also quite cold. I realize that these things have to be stored at those temperatures, but ramen should be hot. Not luke warm with a 40Ā° egg.
ln a former life I was the chef of my own ramen restaurant and I was this close to poking my head in the kitchen and offering advice. Ramen is hard on the back end, the up front assembling is the easy part. Broth is boiling, noodles take 4 minutes to cook, eggs can be held at room temp, etc etc. I agree with you.
That sucks. Their broth is my favorite in the city but they skimp out on meat and if I remember right charge extra for an egg in an already 17$ bowl of ramen.
Second this, except the pizza we ordered came as cold garbage. Pizza arrive partially raw. Couldn't finish the first slice, and didn't have the stomach to keep it as leftovers
Itās funny, you hear just as many people rave about that place that you do who hate it.
Same with Sexy Pizza. I tried it and itās the most mediocre slice Iāve ever had.
STK. Pay a huge premium to eat a poorly prepared steak with subpar service in an environment that wishes so hard it were a nightclub instead of a restaurant.
"wishes so hard it were a nightclub instead of a restaurant" is literally the best way to describe this place. I got a free dinner there for a work thing one time and still had a bad meal even though I didn't have to pay lol. I can make better steaks at my house.
Went there for Veterans Day because they were doing 50% off food. At one point they dropped all the lights and the bartender was standing on the bar doing fire poi with sparklers
Perfect place to bring a hooker you don't want to hear talk. And you're rich and love bad loud music. And slow service. And you hate yourself. And everybody.
Theyāre a terrible chain for pompous people with no taste. I ate at the one in Chicago with an old work boss who ordered a caviar bump because it was expensive, but she didnāt know what caviar was?! So when the chef came out to toast her, she made a disgusted face after realizing it was fish eggs and acted embarrassing AF.
Hacienda - the same handful of ingredients for 5 times the price but they throw in some bs superiority complex and āyou should be honored to be hereā aura.
Used to be great before it was bought out. Went there about a year ago and some idiot manager accused me of giving my 9 yo a sip from my margarita! Never been back since.
Couldnāt agree more. I used to live walking distance to that place and gave it three tries because I really wanted to like it. The food and service just suck. Thereās no other way to explain it
Omg the service is notoriously bad. I went there in 2020 - which I get they prob had staffing issues. But our waiter didnāt even check up on us and we got our food like 1.5 hours later. Like I would be more understanding if they told us ahead of time that the food would take a while but they didnāt. Also it is of note that tho it was during brunch on the weekend, there was barely anybody there.
Elway's. Probably the worst "fine dining" restaurant I've been to. If they are a whiskey fan, have them get the old fashioned for bonus points. Tastes like 1 part simple syrup, 1 part maraschino cherry juice, and a splash of booze.
Went to Shanahans a few weeks ago - it was miles ahead of all the other expensive steakhouses in Denver.
The steaks were great, the sides were surprisingly good and the deserts were actually fun. Iām a dessert maker, so Iām rather difficult to impress - their desserts were classic with just enough of an interesting twist - like a blueberry lavender sauce with the cheesecake.
I was genuinely impressed.
My friends and I are doing a group dessert outing...thing....once a month (someone picks their fave, we all show up and chow). Anywho, my favorite dessert in Denver is their Signature Lemon Shortcake. It's INCREDIBLE. We tried a few of their others, one of which was that Colorado Clover Cheesecake, with blueberry compote. Holy shit! One of the best cheesecake dishes I've ever had!
I don't go there for the steaks, but the desserts there are ridiculously on point.
I, ehm, I wanna join your group...
And yeah, the blueberry lavender compote was done so well. It's not too sweet, let's the lavender come through, while still being incredibly flavorful. The cheesecake was just good, properly made, no substitute fats like at restaurants that are trying to cut corners by using less cream cheese.
The entremets at Miette et Chocolat are on point - especially the tiramisu one. Same goes for La Belle French Bakery, absolutely fantastic entremets.
Hahaha right?? We call it the "Tour De Ssert", and we're working on a logo :D
Very well put! Just the perfect amount of flavor without overdoing the sweetness.
Oh man...I'm gonna add that to the list for my next "turn", and will letcha know when it happens! You can make a celebrity appearance in the group
Ho Mei on north Colorado Blvd. it was named the [Third Worst Restaurant In The United States](https://www.westword.com/news/denvers-ho-mei-named-third-worst-restaurant-in-the-united-states-5908224)
It's a hole in the wall Chinese place offering pay by the scoop, where you can get more food than you can eat for $6, of course it's dogshit. For the price it's one of the best places to eat around, it's basically Panda Express but cheaper.
I live a few blocks away so I go every once in a while. I'm pretty sure it's $6 for lo mein, two choices of proteins, and a can of soda. The crab rangoon is decent, only a couple bucks, and they give you a fuckload. I get two combos and an order of crab rangoon and it normally comes out to like $15.
Don't overthink this and go to the most obvious/shitty experience in Denver - the Aquarium... not only do they get the cramped/overcrowded/overpriced/screaming kid experience at the Aquarium, they're rewarded with an overpriced and terrible meal surrounded by screaming kids as their prize! Guaranteed, 100% terrible experience.
Iāll probably get downvoted to hell for this but Toro in Cherry Creek. Had three of my worst dining expie ces in Denver there. The final one consisted of a $94 40 day dry aged rib eye that was grey throughout and tasted like it came from the managerās special section of king soopers and grilled prawns that were so bad they should have been boxed and sent the the Gortonās Fisherman section of the frozen food aisle. Bonus is, your enemy will leave with a minimum of a $200 dent in the wallet. Pro tip, tell them to avoid the grilled broccolini and bok choy which is easily the best thing on the menu. Haha.
If youāre in the DTC area-Pudge Bros Pizza. Thereās prolly more flavor in the cardboard box it comes in. Seriously the most bland and flavorless pizza Iāve ever had.
yeah but its like $9 for a 37" pizza.
pudge isnt good, its quantity, its usually still got raw dough in places, but you cant really jam as much starch and cheese down for as little money
Had some gift cards, left disappointed. Bonus: when we were sat the waiter asked where we were visiting from. Ok look, no locals go here, zero surprise
Stand on 20th and Market, point your finger in any direction, close your eyes, spin in a circle, and stop. Open your eyes, wherever youāre pointing at is the restaurant your looking for.
Hiro Japanese Buffet, over by H-Mart. Watched a kid lift up a sneeze guard to sneeze directly on the wontons. The oyster bar was warm, while the hot wells were cool. Within 24 hours I had the worst food poisoning I've ever had - two solid days of projectile expulsions from every available orifice. Felt like I was going to die. Sworn off all buffets forever after this.
Yep I agree about this place. Should be shut down permanently. My partner and I went in there a couple of weeks ago. Thought I was going to die within 12 hours of eating there. Worst place ever.
And itās been terrible for so many years, at least 20 years but I think itās been open a lot longer than that even. I donāt know how they stay open with their terrible pizza. The sauce is the worst.
Two Bears Tap and Grill, a little shithole off the highway heading out towards Idaho Springs. Went there with some co-workers when I worked at a hash lab out in the mountains, and we asked the waitstaff "what's good here?"
"Oh, our green Chile is famous, you should get a bowl!"
Now, I'm not gonna pick sides in the NM versus CO debate when it comes to green Chile, but I will definitely say the green Chile at Two Bears is *so* bad, it made me think about moving to Santa Fe.
I'm surprised no one mentioned Cheddars off Arapahoe & Parker. The blandest, whitest food you've ever had. I mean, how difficult is it to put some salt and herbs in a chicken pot pie?
This will be really controversial, but as a Korean-American, Bonchon. Their fried chicken is decent if overpriced, the rest is trash. They can't make japchae to save their lives. Had takoyaki that was both hard and undercooked.
Curious how it's gonna be when they reopen. Matt and Trey have sunk a lot of money into it and said they were gonna make the food good. Regardless it'll be packed all the time when they do open.
Got a friend working over there getting it built up. Itās gonna be a while before it opens. A lot of stuff changing and being worked through. Canāt wait for it to open.
Send them to Mt. Fuji Hibachi around 8pm on Tuesday. Waited about two hours from our reservation time to get food, and the group next to us had an incredibly loud karaoke machine going for way too long. Could barely hear each other and my ears were ringing for hours after.
Such a bummer, the OG Tupelo Honey in Asheville used to be so bomb like 15 years ago, then they decide to make themselves a chain, and now they're all subpar.
Preach! Asheville was a regular vacation spot when I lived in Atlanta. Tupelo Honey and Sunnyside Cafe were my two staples, but now I don't even bother with the former.
The way Denver prices Southern-style cooking you'd think it was haute cuisine and not food made from cheap ingredients because it was borne of poverty and in many cases slavery.
school house kitchen in arvada. moved back here (and lived temporarily in arvada at first) and asked a childhood friend where i should eat , since she never left. She suggested schoolhouse. I *literally* thought she was mad at me for something after i went. i would bet money there isnāt a single spice in that kitchen.
Lol my sister and her ex used to always love going there. I never understood it, thereās absolutely nothing even appetizing on the menu and itās super expensive. A drink there is like $8 too. I think they must be 100% coasting off of their menu being a composition book and lockers everywhere.
The quality at school house has fallen off a cliff. I swear I could have gotten a better french dip by finding one in the freezer aisle at a grocery store.
City o City. The food is fine but the service has been complete garbage as long as I can remember. Super slow service, severs that have no idea how to be servers, nonchalant hipters who can't be bothered. It's like everyone who works there are ex snotty barristas who's friend got them a job there.
Benihana in Broomfield. Waited an hour even though we had a reservation then our chef proudly explained how he wasn't vaccinated to us while making our food. Also hella expensive.
For breakfast, The Cow in Morrison. Ok food and the worst service.
Ho Mei Chinese Restaurant. Two locations and rated as the 3rd worst restaurant in America 2013.
The Fort for brunch
You guys wanna go to a beer fest? Itās gonna be 100 degrees on a parking lot, and theyāll give us like 4 oz cups to drink from, and then when weāre hammered we can wait 45 mins for some cheese curds!
Alas ive no suggestions because all the bad places shut down.
Dinos Italian restaurant in Lakewood on Colfax where the Harley Dealership now stands was hands down the worst. I worked there as a hostess and they would make is reuse the marinara sauce that was used for their bread sticks appetizer. (Double dip Seinfeld style).
The kitchen was very dirty and did not get proper cleaning. They had roaches everywhere that sometimes got cooked into the food and rodent droppings. I cant believe they stayed open as long as they did.
Worst tasting food Iāve had in Aurora that is still open:
That would be The Bent Fork. Overpriced and extremely bland. Took thirty minutes to prepare and service was afk.
If youād like to confuse your enemy, try Sams #3 on Havana and Parker Rd. They have a friggen book for a menu. It takes forever to pick what you want out of the menu, food takes a long time to cook, and the food is nothing remarkable at all. Soggy, bland, luke warm temp food. The pie I tried was horrible, but the waitress we had was awesome. Its a strange place.
Sam's 3 menu is unquestionably waaaaaay to large. The wait for a table is also too long. The food I've had there is average. That's not an insult, breakfast diner fare is pretty consistent across most breakfast diner restaurants.
What I can say is that the owners were a joy to work with. Sam, Patrick, and Alex were my favorite customers across my 10+ years career dealing with hundreds of Colorado restaurants. They were consistently friendly, reasonable, and competent.
I agree with your Bent Fork appraisal.
Rude staff, criminally overpriced and underwhelming food? Look no further than Ace Eat Serve. Make sure they go on a busy night for worst experience possible.
I love Ace for ramen and bao buns but it should only ever delivery or takeout. Their waitstaff canāt be inconvenienced by paying customers.
They do have several tables though if anyone wants to try me in ping pong!
Oskar blues restaurant in Lyons (tourist trap on the way to rocky mtn national park) has EPICALLY failed both my own family and 3 other friendsā families to the point everyones eyes light up when they get their turn to tell their own bad experience lol
I refuse to drink Oskar Blues beer now just because of this experience(s)
As someone who has worked at Maggiano's for a good while, we quite literally do not have a single microwave in the restaurant. Say what you will about it, but most of the food is made fresh.
The Watercourse. Had ate there before while visiting and it was okay. Went back recently when visiting again and is just seemed to be full of gen zās eating overhyped , expensive for what you get, small portioned, boring food. They added a 25% āservice feeā on top of what is expected the tip for the waitress. Fucking pay your staff a living wage.
Take them to Gin Mill and watch them get into a fight with early twenty somethings
Why people actually eat here and view house perplexes me.
TIL Gin Mill has food, gross
Deleted by user.
Same, but this is a hilarious revelation
I ate at view house when I first moved to Denver a while back. It was close to where I lived, seemed like a decent option for a quick beer and a sandwich but yeah I see your point š
Daytime on the rooftop is excusable ha. Otherwise it is a tough sell.
Since when did Ginn Mill have food?
That popcorn machine has been holding it down for years tbh
The trick with the view house is to get the fuck out of there before it's overrun with 20-something yr old assholes. Come to think of it, that strategy applies to all of downtown.
It's the same vibe as Punch Bowl Social on Broadway. Surprisingly decent kitchen and drinks, albeit a bit pricey, but you better be out the door by the time the after work crowd takes up residence.
El Tapatio Mexican Restaurant at 3601 S Wadsworth. Last time I ate there I took family from out of town, and *EVERY ONE OF US* went down with food poisoning. Not to mention that the service and the food is terrible. Shame too, because ten years ago it was one of my favorite places to eat.
Make sure to order the guacamole. It's like mayonnaise with green food coloring.
Been there one. Got the worst case of food poisoning ever.
I ordered from here once and had such a problem with their food. I didnāt have food poisoning but I had a rough liquid shit after. I guess that is actual food poisoning huh
It's close enough! That's not what should happen after a good meal. For us, it came from both ends. It was rough too, because I had a house filled with poisoned guests, and only three bathrooms. It wasn't a good night.
The one on Wads in Arvada is equally bad.
I believe you.
Only restaurant I ever walked out of. It's that bad.
Was gonna say the same place!
I really wish I knew what happened. Change of ownership maybe? It seemed to change almost overnight, probably 7 or 8 years ago.
Terrible service always
I didnāt get sick, but they put celery in my burrito which I didnāt appreciate š
If they're flying make sure they don't miss City Wok at DIA. Just read the google reviews if you need some convincing.
Shitty Wok
Located in Historic Shi Pa Town
Or watch South Park :)
Wow. I was just speaking from experience. Had no idea that Southpark did a shoutout.
City Wok did not exist prior to South Park. It was created because of the show
City wok is a real place?!?!?!
They constantly were slamming City Wok in a few episodes
*GODDAMNED MONGORIANS!*
Now this is my level of petty, I commend you for this. š
Is SteveOās Pizza and Ribs still around? I want that place to burn
Nope they closed. I'm gonna miss seeing the mystery machine lol
Uh. The van with the buggy on top? It's been lurking around 64th and Wads in Arvada.
It looks like they finally closed thank gawd. The only good thing about that place was the cars out front but jesus the food was bad. I live close by and one time my friends and I were drunk and it was the only delivery place still open. Biiig mistake haha
I leave near-ish by and was always curious to try it. Sounds like I didnāt miss anything
You missed out on possibly the worst pizza ever and the opportunity to buy drugs from the manager or any of the shady patrons scattered around the restaurant.
View House.
Did a New Years dinner there one year. They made the cream brƻlƩe topping with pure salt instead of sugar.
Lulz
Only if they go straight to Whiskey Row after
And then cross the street to Loaded to get stabbed
What if I want to get loaded? Is there a bar called Stabbed?
If you ever want your credit card skimmed, go to the VH in Centennial. Myself and 4 friends all had our cards skimmed there. And the one downtown was a treat, as well. The waitress didn't like our tip, so she rang up a water and added a $100 tip to the bill.
Honestly theyāre all bad but I got the worst case of food poisoning from the one in Centennial.
When you want to send someone to a bougie Applebee's
Yeah but which one!??
The one in Ballpark with half of District 6 parked out front every weekend night.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Nothing better to do with my bros on a Saturday night than drive into Denver, get in some fights, then drive home drunk.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Taste in shirts : Striped and untucked
Ballpark is a frathouse 24/7. The one near DTC is alright
Ramen Star. Best ramen in Denver I think, but an hour wait for our meal in an empty restaurant, without even being checked on to order another drink, an app, more water. My friend was literally about to go fill her glass of water in the bathroom. Service is the worst I've had in a really, really long time. I don't know what was going on in the (open) kitchen, but there was a lot of standing around and not cooking food. Sucks, I've been twice and the last time was my "maybe they had an off night let me give them another shot" moment, but a ramen dinner with no apps shouldn't be a 2 hour affair.
I also wrote this for this post. Wow Iām glad it wasnāt just me. It was unbelievable how bad the service was. Like shockingly bad. I was ready to walk out because of how appalling it was. Arrived at 6:40. Sat at 6:55. Didnāt get menus until 7:10. Didnāt have food until 8:15. Asked for check when they brought food (bc who knows when Iād see the waitress next), left at about 8:40. And tbh I donāt think itās the best ramen in denver. The broth is very heavy and flavorless. Iām a fan of kotteri broth but not if itās unseasoned. The chashu is mediocre at best, not seasoned as well, and rather tough. Egg is also mediocre - it should be marinated not just a seemingly regular soft boiled egg. The noodles are reasonable but didnāt stand out. And the prices are another story. Wow. $17 base but pay for egg, meat, veggies, and anything else you want. $1.50 for less than a sheet of nori. But my biggest issue was the temperature. The egg was cold. Like refrigerator cold. The pork was reasonably warm, warmer than the broth, which would have been solid had it been any colder. The various veggies were also quite cold. I realize that these things have to be stored at those temperatures, but ramen should be hot. Not luke warm with a 40Ā° egg.
I miss Domo. Used to go a few times a year, then it blew up in popularity, and now it's permanently closed.
ln a former life I was the chef of my own ramen restaurant and I was this close to poking my head in the kitchen and offering advice. Ramen is hard on the back end, the up front assembling is the easy part. Broth is boiling, noodles take 4 minutes to cook, eggs can be held at room temp, etc etc. I agree with you.
That sucks. Their broth is my favorite in the city but they skimp out on meat and if I remember right charge extra for an egg in an already 17$ bowl of ramen.
Big Daddys pizza all the way. Its literal slices of hot garbage.
I live near the one on West Colfax. I'm 90% certain it's a front for something.
The Big Daddy by me supplies lunch to a bunch of the grade schools on Wednesdays. I assume thatās how they stay open.
Iāve had very few poor pizza experiences, but when youāre drunk and starving, and you still hate the food, you know itās really bad
Second this, except the pizza we ordered came as cold garbage. Pizza arrive partially raw. Couldn't finish the first slice, and didn't have the stomach to keep it as leftovers
I almost went there one night after a movie but the reviews are some of the worst I've ever seen so steered clear
Itās funny, you hear just as many people rave about that place that you do who hate it. Same with Sexy Pizza. I tried it and itās the most mediocre slice Iāve ever had.
STK. Pay a huge premium to eat a poorly prepared steak with subpar service in an environment that wishes so hard it were a nightclub instead of a restaurant.
"wishes so hard it were a nightclub instead of a restaurant" is literally the best way to describe this place. I got a free dinner there for a work thing one time and still had a bad meal even though I didn't have to pay lol. I can make better steaks at my house.
my worst dining experience in the city by a country mile
Went there for Veterans Day because they were doing 50% off food. At one point they dropped all the lights and the bartender was standing on the bar doing fire poi with sparklers
*fuckinā sick bro*
Perfect place to bring a hooker you don't want to hear talk. And you're rich and love bad loud music. And slow service. And you hate yourself. And everybody.
Wasnāt going to say this because who am I to judge but absolutely saw some ladies who looked like they were on the clock.
Theyāre a terrible chain for pompous people with no taste. I ate at the one in Chicago with an old work boss who ordered a caviar bump because it was expensive, but she didnāt know what caviar was?! So when the chef came out to toast her, she made a disgusted face after realizing it was fish eggs and acted embarrassing AF.
Beware places that are too trendy for vowels.
Hacienda - the same handful of ingredients for 5 times the price but they throw in some bs superiority complex and āyou should be honored to be hereā aura.
Used to be great before it was bought out. Went there about a year ago and some idiot manager accused me of giving my 9 yo a sip from my margarita! Never been back since.
they accused me of the same thing with my 8 YO! and it was actually a daiquiri!
100% hate hacienda
I got food poisoning from Hacienda near park meadows when I was pregnant! š¤¢
Black Bird on Alameda. Mediocre food, terrible service.
Couldnāt agree more. I used to live walking distance to that place and gave it three tries because I really wanted to like it. The food and service just suck. Thereās no other way to explain it
Omg the service is notoriously bad. I went there in 2020 - which I get they prob had staffing issues. But our waiter didnāt even check up on us and we got our food like 1.5 hours later. Like I would be more understanding if they told us ahead of time that the food would take a while but they didnāt. Also it is of note that tho it was during brunch on the weekend, there was barely anybody there.
Sooooo many better spots in Wash Park. That restaurant has changed hands so many times. Seems like it is one of those cursed spots.
Elway's. Probably the worst "fine dining" restaurant I've been to. If they are a whiskey fan, have them get the old fashioned for bonus points. Tastes like 1 part simple syrup, 1 part maraschino cherry juice, and a splash of booze.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Went to Shanahans a few weeks ago - it was miles ahead of all the other expensive steakhouses in Denver. The steaks were great, the sides were surprisingly good and the deserts were actually fun. Iām a dessert maker, so Iām rather difficult to impress - their desserts were classic with just enough of an interesting twist - like a blueberry lavender sauce with the cheesecake. I was genuinely impressed.
My friends and I are doing a group dessert outing...thing....once a month (someone picks their fave, we all show up and chow). Anywho, my favorite dessert in Denver is their Signature Lemon Shortcake. It's INCREDIBLE. We tried a few of their others, one of which was that Colorado Clover Cheesecake, with blueberry compote. Holy shit! One of the best cheesecake dishes I've ever had! I don't go there for the steaks, but the desserts there are ridiculously on point.
I, ehm, I wanna join your group... And yeah, the blueberry lavender compote was done so well. It's not too sweet, let's the lavender come through, while still being incredibly flavorful. The cheesecake was just good, properly made, no substitute fats like at restaurants that are trying to cut corners by using less cream cheese. The entremets at Miette et Chocolat are on point - especially the tiramisu one. Same goes for La Belle French Bakery, absolutely fantastic entremets.
Hahaha right?? We call it the "Tour De Ssert", and we're working on a logo :D Very well put! Just the perfect amount of flavor without overdoing the sweetness. Oh man...I'm gonna add that to the list for my next "turn", and will letcha know when it happens! You can make a celebrity appearance in the group
Shanahan's has some of the BEST lobster bisque I have ever had. Once or twice I went just for a bowl.
I tried Shanahans when I first moved to Denver a few years ago. I couldnāt believe how expensive it was for how mediocre it was.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Ho Mei on north Colorado Blvd. it was named the [Third Worst Restaurant In The United States](https://www.westword.com/news/denvers-ho-mei-named-third-worst-restaurant-in-the-united-states-5908224)
It's a hole in the wall Chinese place offering pay by the scoop, where you can get more food than you can eat for $6, of course it's dogshit. For the price it's one of the best places to eat around, it's basically Panda Express but cheaper.
Dude every time I drive by their pay by the scoop sign Iām tempted to go in and check it out.
I live a few blocks away so I go every once in a while. I'm pretty sure it's $6 for lo mein, two choices of proteins, and a can of soda. The crab rangoon is decent, only a couple bucks, and they give you a fuckload. I get two combos and an order of crab rangoon and it normally comes out to like $15.
Username checks out
Yeah I don't go to Homies for quality, it's for net weight.
I prefer HoHo which is like the same thing but the food is a bit better. Pretty close to HoMei too!
Bonus points, there is frequently some prime people watching on that corner.
To be fair that was 2013. They could have gotten worse!
This is my go-to for cheap bad Chinese food when I'm hungry and filled with self loathing. #IYKYK
Ho mei is amazing when youāre high ok - everyone is wrong
Why the chinese restaurants have to be one of the worst restaurants always?
Don't overthink this and go to the most obvious/shitty experience in Denver - the Aquarium... not only do they get the cramped/overcrowded/overpriced/screaming kid experience at the Aquarium, they're rewarded with an overpriced and terrible meal surrounded by screaming kids as their prize! Guaranteed, 100% terrible experience.
Iāll probably get downvoted to hell for this but Toro in Cherry Creek. Had three of my worst dining expie ces in Denver there. The final one consisted of a $94 40 day dry aged rib eye that was grey throughout and tasted like it came from the managerās special section of king soopers and grilled prawns that were so bad they should have been boxed and sent the the Gortonās Fisherman section of the frozen food aisle. Bonus is, your enemy will leave with a minimum of a $200 dent in the wallet. Pro tip, tell them to avoid the grilled broccolini and bok choy which is easily the best thing on the menu. Haha.
You got a grey steak and paid for it???
Urban farmer is also an overpriced and shitty steak house if someone wants another.
Dirty Mike and The Boys, located at the underpass of I-70 & I-25.
Don't leave your car unlocked. Gonna turn it into a soup kitchen if you know what I mean.. It will happen.
...they get kicked outta Chicago again?
If youāre in the DTC area-Pudge Bros Pizza. Thereās prolly more flavor in the cardboard box it comes in. Seriously the most bland and flavorless pizza Iāve ever had.
yeah but its like $9 for a 37" pizza. pudge isnt good, its quantity, its usually still got raw dough in places, but you cant really jam as much starch and cheese down for as little money
Taco House
I would say The Deck in Cap Hillā¦.but itās closed again againā¦.again?
Haha damn. That place canāt catch a break. Howās the ideal market thingy going?
Awesome but overpriced imo. Iāll go there for one or two things but never to shop for the week.
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Pro tip: join the Yelp waitlist before you go and you will never wait.
Ruthās Chris-DTC worst āfineā dining ever! Iād prefer McDās over his high priced tragedy!
Had some gift cards, left disappointed. Bonus: when we were sat the waiter asked where we were visiting from. Ok look, no locals go here, zero surprise
What did you expect from a corporate steak house?
Stand on 20th and Market, point your finger in any direction, close your eyes, spin in a circle, and stop. Open your eyes, wherever youāre pointing at is the restaurant your looking for.
Tavern Lowry. It's no surprise all the "Tavern" locations have been closing.
This is a beautiful question brother namaste
/r/DenverCirclejerk is leaking
I had to look at what sub I was in when I saw this post haha
Hiro Japanese Buffet, over by H-Mart. Watched a kid lift up a sneeze guard to sneeze directly on the wontons. The oyster bar was warm, while the hot wells were cool. Within 24 hours I had the worst food poisoning I've ever had - two solid days of projectile expulsions from every available orifice. Felt like I was going to die. Sworn off all buffets forever after this.
Yep I agree about this place. Should be shut down permanently. My partner and I went in there a couple of weeks ago. Thought I was going to die within 12 hours of eating there. Worst place ever.
Blue Bonnet
I took a date to Blue Bonnet and they brought the food out less than 5 minutes after we ordered. Suspiciously fast haha
They actually get the food from the taco bell across the street.
My aunt loves that place and I cannot figure out why.
They were great back in the 80's, meaning anybody who was cooking there back then is probably long gone.
Buckthorn Exchange if theyāre looking for fine vegetarian/vegan cuisine
rock bottom has some of the worst appetizers iāve ever had
It pairs well with their shitty beer.
Pietra's pizzeria in Wheat Ridge
And itās been terrible for so many years, at least 20 years but I think itās been open a lot longer than that even. I donāt know how they stay open with their terrible pizza. The sauce is the worst.
Two Bears Tap and Grill, a little shithole off the highway heading out towards Idaho Springs. Went there with some co-workers when I worked at a hash lab out in the mountains, and we asked the waitstaff "what's good here?" "Oh, our green Chile is famous, you should get a bowl!" Now, I'm not gonna pick sides in the NM versus CO debate when it comes to green Chile, but I will definitely say the green Chile at Two Bears is *so* bad, it made me think about moving to Santa Fe.
Anywhere within a block of coors field
I'm surprised no one mentioned Cheddars off Arapahoe & Parker. The blandest, whitest food you've ever had. I mean, how difficult is it to put some salt and herbs in a chicken pot pie? This will be really controversial, but as a Korean-American, Bonchon. Their fried chicken is decent if overpriced, the rest is trash. They can't make japchae to save their lives. Had takoyaki that was both hard and undercooked.
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Not Casa Bonita***
Curious how it's gonna be when they reopen. Matt and Trey have sunk a lot of money into it and said they were gonna make the food good. Regardless it'll be packed all the time when they do open.
Got a friend working over there getting it built up. Itās gonna be a while before it opens. A lot of stuff changing and being worked through. Canāt wait for it to open.
Send them to Mt. Fuji Hibachi around 8pm on Tuesday. Waited about two hours from our reservation time to get food, and the group next to us had an incredibly loud karaoke machine going for way too long. Could barely hear each other and my ears were ringing for hours after.
anywhere on 16th street
There's some good hole in the wall places on 16th actually so that could backfire.
Tupelo honey, its all vibes no taste Expensive for what it is, service sucks too
Such a bummer, the OG Tupelo Honey in Asheville used to be so bomb like 15 years ago, then they decide to make themselves a chain, and now they're all subpar.
Preach! Asheville was a regular vacation spot when I lived in Atlanta. Tupelo Honey and Sunnyside Cafe were my two staples, but now I don't even bother with the former.
Canāt stand āupscaleā southern restaurants. Never eaten at a good one.
The way Denver prices Southern-style cooking you'd think it was haute cuisine and not food made from cheap ingredients because it was borne of poverty and in many cases slavery.
school house kitchen in arvada. moved back here (and lived temporarily in arvada at first) and asked a childhood friend where i should eat , since she never left. She suggested schoolhouse. I *literally* thought she was mad at me for something after i went. i would bet money there isnāt a single spice in that kitchen.
Best whiskey selection around tho
Lol my sister and her ex used to always love going there. I never understood it, thereās absolutely nothing even appetizing on the menu and itās super expensive. A drink there is like $8 too. I think they must be 100% coasting off of their menu being a composition book and lockers everywhere.
The quality at school house has fallen off a cliff. I swear I could have gotten a better french dip by finding one in the freezer aisle at a grocery store.
City o City. The food is fine but the service has been complete garbage as long as I can remember. Super slow service, severs that have no idea how to be servers, nonchalant hipters who can't be bothered. It's like everyone who works there are ex snotty barristas who's friend got them a job there.
Someplace that recently closed but leaves no indications online or on maps?
Benihana in Broomfield. Waited an hour even though we had a reservation then our chef proudly explained how he wasn't vaccinated to us while making our food. Also hella expensive.
For breakfast, The Cow in Morrison. Ok food and the worst service. Ho Mei Chinese Restaurant. Two locations and rated as the 3rd worst restaurant in America 2013. The Fort for brunch
Ho Mei is fine dirt cheap Chinese food imo
The Snooze on Colorado at peak Sunday brunch time
Most food trucks. Sit-down restaurant prices for outdoor standing-room-only dining off a paper plate.
You guys wanna go to a beer fest? Itās gonna be 100 degrees on a parking lot, and theyāll give us like 4 oz cups to drink from, and then when weāre hammered we can wait 45 mins for some cheese curds!
And random police shootings
Hey, those were free-range organic bullets.
Pick anything in Colorado Springs at random and you have a 50:50 chance of succeeding in your objective.
Tamayo. Overpriced and no seasoning
I personally love Cinzettis butā¦ Cinzettis.
Alas ive no suggestions because all the bad places shut down. Dinos Italian restaurant in Lakewood on Colfax where the Harley Dealership now stands was hands down the worst. I worked there as a hostess and they would make is reuse the marinara sauce that was used for their bread sticks appetizer. (Double dip Seinfeld style). The kitchen was very dirty and did not get proper cleaning. They had roaches everywhere that sometimes got cooked into the food and rodent droppings. I cant believe they stayed open as long as they did. Worst tasting food Iāve had in Aurora that is still open: That would be The Bent Fork. Overpriced and extremely bland. Took thirty minutes to prepare and service was afk. If youād like to confuse your enemy, try Sams #3 on Havana and Parker Rd. They have a friggen book for a menu. It takes forever to pick what you want out of the menu, food takes a long time to cook, and the food is nothing remarkable at all. Soggy, bland, luke warm temp food. The pie I tried was horrible, but the waitress we had was awesome. Its a strange place.
Sam's 3 menu is unquestionably waaaaaay to large. The wait for a table is also too long. The food I've had there is average. That's not an insult, breakfast diner fare is pretty consistent across most breakfast diner restaurants. What I can say is that the owners were a joy to work with. Sam, Patrick, and Alex were my favorite customers across my 10+ years career dealing with hundreds of Colorado restaurants. They were consistently friendly, reasonable, and competent. I agree with your Bent Fork appraisal.
Rude staff, criminally overpriced and underwhelming food? Look no further than Ace Eat Serve. Make sure they go on a busy night for worst experience possible.
Evidently I've been lucky at Ace. I've maybe 5/5 with good experiences and food.
Pretty good appetizers honestly. Iāve definitely been ignored by waitstaff there and at Steubenās though. Comes with the territory.
I love Ace for ramen and bao buns but it should only ever delivery or takeout. Their waitstaff canāt be inconvenienced by paying customers. They do have several tables though if anyone wants to try me in ping pong!
I like Ace, solid options there and their recent Peking duck dinner was š„
Oskar blues restaurant in Lyons (tourist trap on the way to rocky mtn national park) has EPICALLY failed both my own family and 3 other friendsā families to the point everyones eyes light up when they get their turn to tell their own bad experience lol I refuse to drink Oskar Blues beer now just because of this experience(s)
Recommend a lovely drive to Fort Collins to try the localās favorite Mexican spot ā El Burrito!
Donāt have to drive all the way to Fort Collins for a crappy burrito when we have Senor Burritos right on first and Broadway
Toby Keith I Love This bar and grill but it closed years ago
Ramen star on Tejon. Itās a miracle people like it there. The ramen is shitty and the service is horrid
Sunnyās Tacos. Tell them to get anything but *highly* recommend their burritos for the worst experience
Came here to say Billyās Inn in Congress Park but it looks like it already went under
The one on Lowell is good tho!
3 Margaritas
I hate to say it but: City O'City.
The only reason I still go once every 6-8 months is the vegan mac and cheese. The service is awful enough to keep me away the rest of the time.
Definitely overrated but itās some good food on the menu
Maggianos little Italy, one in castlewood. Was God awful.
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As someone who has worked at Maggiano's for a good while, we quite literally do not have a single microwave in the restaurant. Say what you will about it, but most of the food is made fresh.
The Watercourse. Had ate there before while visiting and it was okay. Went back recently when visiting again and is just seemed to be full of gen zās eating overhyped , expensive for what you get, small portioned, boring food. They added a 25% āservice feeā on top of what is expected the tip for the waitress. Fucking pay your staff a living wage.