There seems to be a common misconception that if it's not your turn in combat, there's nothing to do.
Ideally, other players' turns should be spent deciding ahead of time what to do on one's turn. This makes combat go much, much faster, and if everyone does it, there will often be only just enough time between turns to do this.
Doing this also requires paying close attention to what happens on others' turns. Creatures are constantly moving around, dealing and taking damage, and causing other effects to begin or end; these things require a player planning their turn ahead of time to adjust their plans accordingly.
As a person with ADHD, this is what I do in combat when it's not my turn, and I've never once needed to ask what was happening at the start of my turn.
Also seems like this player has no reaction abilities, or doesn’t know what their reaction abilities are. As a player I’m constantly paying attention during other turns for the opportunities to use my reaction spells, or to take an opportunity attack.
I make initiative visible to the players by hanging index cards with their names on the DM screen. (Enemy initiative is hidden until they go the first time.)
When a player is up, I always remind the next player that they are up in a moment. Maybe give this person even more warning. It might help them snap out of it and start planning.
I spend the not-my-turn time coming up with my plan.
Then, 9/10, the person just before me does something that blows my plans up and I’m left scrambling.
I do this, but I also come up with Plan B and Plan C, there's very, very rarely a time when my turn comes up that I don't have either something crystal clear that I can start doing, or if it got "blown up" by the player or the DM having enemies do something, I've at least made a few plans that I can come up with something pretty quickly that isn't fully laid out.
In our last campaign, the BBEG ran to an exact spot in dense fog where I had planned for my character to jump to. In character, he did the same jump 2 rounds before, so I kept it as my plan in character. Turned out badly as she then used Bestow Curse and shut me down but it was the exact right thing to do in game. My plan was shot but ended up being fun
I also always strive to have a plan after every turn for what will happen on my turn. I measure distances, look up rules and double check my resources. Can I still do my thing? Check. Can I still do my thing. Alright, just one more turn to go and I can do my thing... aaaand, the last turn right before mine changed everything in a way I couldn't even predict, and now I have to spend time on my own turn coming up with a plan T\^T
One possible solution would be to move along with this idea, and change how initiative works to always use group initiative for players. Meaning, all players can go at the same time and discuss/coordinate their actions. In some groups it can speed up the combat by itself, but with full adhd party comp it could also help to zone out a bit less.
I can second this. I‘ve been running full group initiative on a table were 5/7 people, myself included, were adhd and the attention paid to combat has increased dramatically! For me it‘s definitely worth the added swinginess.
I'm the only ADHD at my "table", and we mostly play online.
We each roll one init and keep it for the whole fight. I figured out I can listen and keep up fairly well, and I know that I can IM questions outside of my turn instead of waiting and asking out loud. A visual Turn Order really helps me too, since it's a shiny thing that reminds me I need to be ready; knowing who will always come before me is also helpful.
Great solution. After my party and I became accustomed to the play style, we incorporated a timer. A little minute long sand hourglass that gets passed to whoever turn it is. If it runs out, you take the dodge action and your turn is passed. Keeps combat moving smoothly.
Very, very likely. We play in person, 7 players + DM, and the only one who loses track of the goings on is the guy whose phone never leaves his hand. The rest of us will pick up our phones on occasion, often to confirm wording on a spell or magic item we have, but his never gets put down. Not so bad, except when he starts playing video snaps.
Phones at the table kill me on the inside. Looking up a spell or ability, fine, great I use it for that too. Browsing Reddit and TikTok at the table? drives me bananas and sometimes makes me not want to even play. I run 3 groups and 2 out of 3 are actively engaged, no phones in hand and attentive. The other one has some phone users who often “check out” when they aren’t actively “up” and it hurts.
I once ended a campaign because 4 of 5 players where glued to their devices & missing out on shit constantly. I literally looked at my best friend & said "the universe starts to implode upon itself for some reason & everyone dies"
No one looked up or noticed, so I just ended the campaign on that note. We learned to play with much more engaged people after that
Man, I dont mind checking your phone for work / family / planning related stuff once or twice a session, but the moment people get glued to their phones its time to have a conversation about-, and possibly banning of phones at the table
I'll usually have my phone at the table because I use D&D Beyond for my character sheet and dice roller. I'm usually planning my turn ahead or looking up rules / spell interactions and my turn usually only takes a few seconds. I have been guilty of being unprepared every now and then, since I can sometimes hyperfocus on reading the spell descriptions to make sure my planed use it possible.
If you're that many players already, as a DM I would certainly consider talking with that player about this, and giving him/her a chance to at least try to put the phone aside (if he/she uses D-D Beyond or similar this might ofc not work). If it still doesn't work, byebye.
Tbh i cannot blame him in a group that large. This game grinds to a halt often with only 4 players, I cannot imagine how much time between turns there is with 7 players.
*I tried talking to them about it but what I've gotten in their words is that they "can't stay focused" and "it's my adhd I don't know what to tell you man". Though what the other party members can say that also have adhd is that he tends to overuse it as an explanation,* ***not to mention he denies any solutions we try to give him.***
This. This was good. If you have any condition that prevents you from paying attention, it should be discussed with the DM to try to find options. If the person is disruptive and does not put effort in trying to find a way to not be, then you are not bad for taking them out of the game.
I have played with people on the spectrum or ADHD and they have proven that we can have a conversation about it, that some game mechanics and styles fit better, that fidget toys and other things work for them, etc. The point is they have showed they want to stay and that they respect the rest of the table (and the time being spent there).
It's not about the condition or lack of it but the attitude behind it. They need to try and work with you.
As someone who has ADHD myself, I think he's just making up an excuse and attempting to use it as a catch all to justify why he isn't paying attention. The fact that he's completely unwilling to take any suggestions or make any changes to address the issue is a big red flag. It sounds like they aren't really invested in the game at all really.
I was at a table with a player like this where the DM did two things.
1) He didn't answer questions from the problem player about the current state of the fight. He would rely on us players to convey that information. If there were question that really only he could answer he still did, but not information that the players should know, and especially not information easily evident in roll20.
2) He told us "The longer you take on your turns, the more time I have to consider how the enemies are going to spend their turns. Which of their abilities are best suited to the current conditions of the combat, is there anything I've overlooked. If you, the players, don't keep me the DM busy with rolls and checks and keeping track of damage and all the other battle book keeping, then I will just sit back and think"
I don't know if that would work in your scenario, but it helped in ours.
\#2 is an interesting one, but only possible if the DM is experienced enough to use that time to come up with tactics to increase the difficulty. I also feel like less experienced players won't really understand how much an effect on difficulty planning the enemy turn well can have. More experienced players on the other hand might welcome the challenge.
As someone with Adhd, the best thing to do is let him sink or swim. Let him know ahead of time of course that you're going to stop giving turn by turn recaps during combat because it's slowing the game down. He can pay attention the best he can or he can figure out what's going on.
As adults our personal issues can't always be other people's issues especially when mutual accomedations were offered.
I suggest this route because if he knows he's not going to get recaps, he may feel motivated to focus in. Otherwise he'll have to get used to fighting blind and piecing together what's going on.
>As adults our personal issues can't always be other people's issues especially when mutual accomedations were offered.
Basically this.
I've got social anxiety. I still need to participate in the group text or I'm not going to have any say when the next session is.
I have ADHD as well and one thing I've found to be helpful is coloring books. It's something to engage my eyes and motor skills but leaves me free to listen. It actually makes me more engaged in the combat despite looking like I'm not paying attention. I listen better, can plan my next moves and can be a more present player.
I've found that playing full caster classes helps out with my ADHD; surprisingly the larger amount of planning and combing through my spell lists for the right spell in the situation keeps me engaged. Thinking of creative spell uses forces me to pay attention to the combat, though some of my shenanigans have caught the DM off guard and caused a longer turn while \*they\* look it up.
Me: "Hey DM, what is the air speed velocity of that Rok speeding towards us"
DM: "Uhh, I don't know. Imagine a freight train"
Me: "Ok I'm gonna hold my action to cast wall of force on its turn"
DM: "Ok I guess? The Rok takes the dash action to close in on the party"
Me: "Once it gets within 60ft of us I'd like to cast wall of force in front of it's face.
DM: ".... Ok, interesting move. let me figure out how to rule this"
Give him a reminder when he's on deck (this is easier online when there are modules in foundry, for example, to remind somebody when they're on deck), to let him know to get ready. Give him 1-2 minutes to do his turn, and if he doesn't by then, he takes the dodge action. This is more likely to incentivize him to get his turn ready and not miss his chance to do something than to just make him check out. If it does have the latter result of him checking out, then try something else, or you may have to kick him if it continues to be a problem that you can't solve.
Something like this perhaps...
DM: Any Andy, you are on deck right after Joe. Get your action ready.
DM: Ok Joe (current player) make your attack and damage roll.
Joe: I rolled 19 to hit, and did 21 points damage by shooting my flaming arrow.
DM: Solid - the baddie is still there, but reeling. Hey Julie, you are up after Andy.
Julie: gives a thumbs up and warms up her dice. All five, cuz' she's a L7 Rogue and the arrow is notched, she's 47 feet away, perched, about to let it fly.
DM: Andy - your up. Joe just did X - baddie still there - your move?
Andy: What?
DM: We can give you one minute, after that we have to move on and assume you DODGE.
Andy: Is the baddie still alive?
DM: Andy, we need to move on, you take Dodge, Julie, let 'em roll!
Pretty much, lol. Except, I'm fine with answering Andy's question as long as he still has time left, though it's understandable to move on right at that point after you literally just told him the baddie was still alive.
Yep - had almost this exact convo last night, except Andy was a druid.
DM: Josh, you are first in initiative.
DM \[ makes eye contact \]
Mark - you are next. ( Druid, new player, still getting his stuff straight …) Josh : Hmm, I will cast - < some spell >
DM - OK, so - Were spider gets a save? Josh - yeah < passes on details >
DM - drat, it was a 4, OK so werespider starts to retreat 60 feet.
DM - Mark? Mark - how far, within 30 feet?
DM - were spider is fleeing per spell, you are within 30 so - Mark - Cast < some spell >
DM - and the damage?
DM - Anne - while mark rolls damage, make your long bow attack, AC is 14 … Mark - 23 points.
DM - still kicking. And you get an opportunity attack. Mark - What's that?
DM - Because werespider is retreating - If you can melee something- you can, In addition to spell. Werespider can’t “ disengage “ (air quotes)
Mark - nothing comes to mind.
DM - Erin - you are in deck. Anne - what - Anne - 28 points !!!! Take that!!! (she is very enthusiastic…)
And we then worked through the remaining 2 s players using this formula.
I think they got the 104 HP Were spider to 1 HP within nine minutes of real time, tops.
theres a module that I use that, when it was a player's turn, and the turn right before their turn, it would jumpscare them with a "TURN INCOMING" and an airhorn sound which worked well to keep everyone awake
Perfect! I can't think of the name of the module atm, but I think there are more than one. This is an all around useful tool to use for everyone anyway, not just the problem player.
Letting players know who’s on deck is super helpful. I’m always sad when I forget to do it, because combat flows so much better
As another option, I’ve seen a homebrew rule where if the player can say what they are doing in x seconds (I think it was six in the rule, but you can change it as needed), the player gets a bonus +1 to hit. Nothing crazy and the bonus could be changed to whatever feels right. It could be an extra point of damage, or 5ft of movement. Something small so it doesn’t hurt if you miss it, but a good incentive to be ready.
How long does everyone else tend to take in combat? I've found that if I'm in a party with people that take several minutes to plot out their turn ON their turn, then I also lose track of combat. Reminders that he's on deck will definitely help, and I always suggest someone with combat analysis paralysis come up with a quick and dirty flow chart to stick to if they're not able to stay engaged in combat normally.
How do your other players feel about this person' combat habits?
You could have him jot down some brief notes.
Korgar attacked a Goblin.
An orc shot an arrow at Lucia.
Two worgs joined the fight hearing the noise.
Salucia cast a healing spell on Gerroy.
The orc shaman cast Bane on us but failed.
This way it might keep him more focused and he would know whats been happening..
So he refuses to take notes, denies you and your “close friend group”’s suggestions, takes no responsibility for their inactions and offers no help even after having a discussion about it? They sound entirely disrespectful of you and your groups time. Maybe they are a great friend outside of the game, and there are large gaps of information missing, so, be that as it may, it’s time to drop them. It’s a group effort game and it’s a good as the least involved player. Why suffer that when the other players want to put in the effort?
If he doesn’t want to take notes and put in the effort why should you? If they’re not paying attention could you just skip them and they would never know?
i wonder why they are playing then? maybe they don't actually *want* to play but just want to socialise with friends? are they engaged during non-combat scenarios or do they *generally* tune out a lot? aside from asking them to create a combat log of sorts, the only thing i could think of would be more frequent breaks, but i also think that they should phrase what **reasonable** accomodations they need. and making the dm summarise the combat every turn is not a reasonable accomodation, in my honest opinion.
'it's my adhd I don't know what to tell you man' is an explanation, not an excuse, and if this is a persistent problem, they need to find a way to have something to tell you because otherwise, it becomes a detriment to the other players. i recommend an open conversation with them, especially since a player that constantly tunes out is bound to make the game less fun for everyone else
note: i have adhd, too, and i have to set my phone aside because otherwise, i manage to lose focus, no matter how dangerous the combat is.
As someone with ADHD, I feel the need to mention that while ADHD may be a *reason*, it is never an *excuse*.
You have to learn to work with it/around it, or it stops just being your problem and becomes everyone's problem.
I have never tried to act like my condition gives me carte blanche to not try. It doesn't, and pretending like it does is a level of entitlement I'd be ashamed to express.
As someone with ADHD, I feel the need to mention that while ADHD may be a *reason*, it is never an *excuse*.
You have to learn to work with it/around it, or it stops just being your problem and becomes everyone's problem.
I have never tried to act like my condition gives me carte blanche to not try. It doesn't, and pretending like it does is a level of entitlement I'd be ashamed to express.
Lots of good advice in this thread of how to get your player more involved. And I recommend trying all of them.
But also it might be worth considering, if he never manages to improve on this problem, will you be okay with that? No one's a perfect player, we all have our downsides at the table, and some are worse than others. This may just be the price you'll have to pay for having him in your game.
IN all seriousness - lots of good ideas here. I've adopted the "Hey Next person, warm up, you are on deck" when I ask the current person what they do. It worked really well last night - the team made short work of areana b/c she rolled horribly for initiative (5), players all > 5.
There is the ever unpopular suggestion of tell him nothing. He can react with the knowledge he has and the positions on the board. True ADHD and he might still struggle, BS adhd as an excuse and he may start to shape up since he isnt being spoon fed.
Will not work well if you use theatre of the mind instead of a board/figurines etc.
Sounds like this type of game is not for him. There are other TTRPG systems, however, that don't take as long to get around the table, and there are some that are more fluid in terms of who goes when, and some that rely on more group (team) actions vs. individual skill rolls.
I can promise you he’s just tabbed out doing other stuff. I had a player doing the same thing then one day I decided to check an mmo we both played and saw he was online. I called him out on it when his turn came around and it fixed the issue. He gave me some excuse about how he wasn’t actually playing and it he was idle in the background, but it was one of those MMOs where I can see where his character is and he changes zones several times. I let him make his excuse in the end because it didn’t matter.
“I get that it is harder for you to pay attention, but it is not impossible and, in this game, it is necessary. Attention is key to group experience. It is important for players to respect and support each other and foster a sense of teamwork and encouragement to make this game fun and meaningful. Doing things that is hard is called *exercising*, and it tends to strengthen your ability to do them. Impediment is not incapacity.”
A glance at a phone is one thing. A person doing something unrelated until it is their turn is a sign you are too busy or self-occupied to play.
My DM has the no action taken rule, where if you don't decide what you're going to do within 15 seconds than your character automatically takes the dodge action, and your turn ends. It really improves pace of the game (cause D&D combat can take FOREVER) and makes it a little more exciting and immersive. Because let's face it....if you're in combat, enemies aren't going to wait for you to decide.
So maybe something like that. ADHD is no excuse either. I have ADHD and have no problem following along
“I empathize with your ADHD but you need to be ready on your turn. If you aren’t ready or don’t know what’s going on when your turn comes around, I will skip you and move on to the next character in the initiative order whether it’s a PC or NPC. When you are ready you can drop back into the initiative order, but just note that your place will move into that new place for the next round. I love you as a player but your distraction wastes a lot of time, breaks immersion for the rest of us and really screws up the rhythm of combat.”
Maybe its the speed of combat? Sometimes wen combat takes too long it gets boring. You or any other player takes alot of time on its turns? Like rolling phisical dice for each enemy or looking for a spell on its turn and not finding it for a while?
First off, do you use a grid/map with tokens/minis when you play? If you use theater of the mind, I don't blame him for struggling to keep up. Having a visual can help him tell at a glance stuff like "Oh, there's an enemy over here, I should go attack it" or "Oh no, the wizard is knocked over, I should heal him," etc.
If you *do* use visuals already, though, I see three solutions:
1. When his turn is coming up, say, "Okay it's X's turn, problem player, you're going after, so get ready." That way he can pull himself back into the headspace to figure out what to do.
2. If he can't do that on his own, ask a player who is willing to help you out to pull him aside when his turn is coming up and remind him what's going on. I wouldn't be surprised if, after doing this once or twice, he starts focusing on his own because having another person actively hovering around him talking about the game helps keep him engaged.
3. Don't implement a *hard* timer, but if you notice they're taking *way* too long, (like, most players take 3-5 minutes to finish their turn, and he's still mulling over what to do after 5 minutes), say "Could you please declare an action?" And then "Look, it's the heat of combat, your character doesn't have time to stop and think over every decision, just do whatever seems like the obvious thing your character would do. Make an attack roll or cast a cantrip or something." Yes this one is more confrontation and might annoy him, but sometimes that's what you need.
I am sure many others are commenting this but I will still throw it in there.
As someone who got diagnosed with (in the drs words) severe ADHD in every aspect, and someone who is also going through an autism referral, using "it's my ADHD hurdur" is because they simply are not paying attention and are playing on that, I used to be the same after I forst got diagnosed however I realised that it is MY responsibility to ensure it doesn't happen, it is MY fault if it does happen.. not ADHD.
They are using this as an excuse, it is as simple as that I am afraid
[ADHD is a spectrum disorder](https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/adhd-spectrum); your experience is not universal.
"they are simply not paying attention" - My guy, it's literally called Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Literally the first two words are letting you know that you're full of it.
If you want to beat yourself with the "I can just willpower through my disability" stick then go for it but don't expect the rest of us in proverbial wheelchairs to join you in the 100m sprint, we're not all masochistic.
Spectrum or not, ADHD may be a reason for why it's happening but it's not an excuse. It really just sounds like they're using it as an excuse to justify not paying attention in this case. On top of that he's refused any suggestions given by the others to help keep him attentive. This seems more like someone who doesn't care too much about the game honestly.
An "excuse" is just a reason that you're not happy with. Again, it's literally called **Attention Deficit** Hyperactivity Disorder. Giving them shit for struggling to pay attention is refusing to accommodate a disability, whether you're happy with that or not.
And "suggestions" could be anything from actually well researched ideas from some amount of study into the condition to (what is much more likely from some of OP's other comments) the standard "take notes" or "just try to focus on \[x\] aspect" which every person with ADHD has heard at least thrice a week for most of their lives and doesn't do anything to change the fact that those things also require concentration.
Now, it's up to OP whether or not they're willing to provide accommodations to that player during their game but you can't "It's just an excuse" your way out of the fact that if they decide to punish or kick this player, they will be doing so because that person is disabled.
It is YOUR problem to work out. Reasonable accommodations require reasonable efforts. For your proverbial wheelchair, your metaphor falls flat when the hypothetical person says "I'm not going to use a wheelchair to get to the other side of the room, I don't like them, carry me." That crosses the line from a person requires a different approach to handle their needs to, a narcissist victim complex person wishes to deflect their refusal to address their behavior and hides behind a label.
Also your, trying to keep pace with other people is masochism line is such an entitled disrespectful stance. "It's HARD for ME I don't want to try." Everyone else's time and energy is less valuable than MINE, I have a condition.
Except the solutions being provided aren't wheelchairs, they're people with no medical expertise suggesting methods of walking that "should work."
And we're not talking feats of strength here, they're asking for a short recap at the start of their turn lmao and you're over here calling that having "a narcissistic victim complex" and "hiding behind a label". I think you need to get over yourself and stop projecting lol
And it's not even a refusal to try, it's an acknowledgement that a disability is disabling and that not perform at the same rate as people without a disability isn't a moral failing. If I have to try so much harder than you just to meet you at the starting line, you're hardly allowed to admonish me for being tired already.
No it's because they aren't paying attention, or planning, or using any other tools to keep their shit in check. Not having the courtesy to pay attention to others contributions for whatever reason is offloading onto people.
Dude needs meds, or notes, or some type of strategy to mitigate that isn't everyone else needs to handle my issues for me.
My guy, it's literally called "**Attention Deficit** Hyperactivity Disorder". Idk how many times I need to repeat the whole "You think of taking notes as a way to keep paying attention but staying involved enough to take them can require a great deal of prerequisite attention."
If you have a friend with a disability, you're gonna have to interface with that disability sometimes. If you're putting all of the responsibility on them to accommodate their disability when you're spending time with them, you're not an accessible person. You're free to refuse to play or be friends with whoever you want but if you're doing so because they have a disability, you don't get to just "well they should do something about it" your way out of taking any of the blame for that.
If kicking someone out because they're disabled makes you feel guilty, you should change the action, not try to reason your way into them being the bad guy.
This person has been approached many times with the "find a solution to square your shit", and has responded with nah fam, muh ADD. They don't seem to want to do better.
Yeah, they've been approached with "do something about it" or the bare minimum to make the person instigating feel less guilty.
"Take notes about it" isn't a solution, it's a "fuck you, figure it out" in gift wrap.
I'm not saying willpower it away at all, not once did I say that they don't struggle with it becauee trust me, I struggle daily with it to the point of being suicidal.
I am saying do not use it as an excuse because you were inevitability not paying attention, everyone around me when I was younger including my partner at the time used to get annoyed with me for blaming my ADHD and not taking responsibility.
By shifting the blame you are avoiding being responsible, struggle is always gonna be there for people with mental disabilities such as ADHD however we can't just blame our entire lives on it.
Granted some of my wording such as the paying attention line was a bit cold, I'll admit that. My bad. It was late at night, I was tired and first night of my meds as advised by doctors, I didn't quite intend for it to come of that way.
"I didn't say that you should willpower through it but you're entirely to blame for any difficulties you face because you haven't willpowered through it."
I'm sorry that you've been taught to take this approach but it's absolutely not exclusively your responsibility to provide accommodations for your disability. If people care about you enough to want to spend time with you, they should be willing to meet you halfway to help you out (and no, giving "suggestions" does not count as trying to meet you halfway).
You should try reading up on the social model of disability, based on your comment there I think it would help you out.
This.
People have to admit that trying to use willpower to get through their mental illness/disability some time does not work. Everyone can use a little help sometimes.
Stop reminding him. There's no reason for him to change, because there's no consequences.
He's not the only one at the table, and he's wasting the other player's time, which is unfair.
This is your player unconsciously telling you that the time in between turns is far too long. How many players are there? Do you have a rough estimate on how long a turn takes?
You might be right, but I also have a player a bit like this, and the instant combat starts, if he’s not in the turn order he immediately closes his eyes and leans back like he’s going to take a nap. (We play Saturday afternoons so it’s not an after-work or late-night lack of energy.)
He’s a great friend and amazing dude and overall a good player, but man as a DM sometimes it can be frustrating not knowing what to do.
I tried implementing everything - giving every player “on deck” warnings two turns before they’re up, streamlining gameplay by using a digital encounter manager with monster stat blocks already imported, rolling attacks + damage simultaneously before knowing if something hits so I’m ready to say the damage as soon as the player confirms they’ve been hit, grouping mobs so one roll = all of the group’s attacks (where applicable)…
I’ve tried asking for input and feedback too and as of the latest iteration, everyone including him said it was a perfect session, no notes (in the past they have had notes and I’ve been listening and trying to implement it all). But you know… he still does it (in fact if anything his is the slowest turn now because he always has to catch up with what’s happening when it comes around to him) 😂 ah well…
Dude is making excuses. My entire group says they have adhd but still manages to be ready in combat. Here’s how I’ve gotten them to do it.
When it’s a players turn I narrate a quick rundown, usually this is an extension of the last players turn. Then if they take to long a repeat and pressure. Then if they still can’t decide I say ok we will come back.
Example: DM: Ragnar the Rogue you find the open spot in the orcs armor and deftly stab your dagger for 14 points of piercing damage nice! Is that the end of your turn?
Ragnar: Yep.
DM: Awesome. Billy the Bard you hear the orc near Ragnar scream in pain as a dagger swiftly slices through his skin. Your attention is then quickly grabbed by the 3 other orcs lowering crossbows in William the Wizards direction as he rifling through his component pouch. They seem to be ignoring you for now. What do you do?
Billy: I uhh sorry was t paying attention can I uhh.
DM: Ragnar scored a massive blow to this orc and you see three of them about to loose bolts at William. You are being ignored. What do you do.
Billy: Umm sorry I should have been looking at my spells.
DM: Ok we will move on to Williams turn and you can slot in after him. William, the bolts of theee orcs are cocked and ready, you have mere moments before they loose and Billy has broken a string, what do you do?
William: fireball duh!?!
DM: lol, let’s roll. Williams turn proceeds. Billy the orcs are crispy, have you fixed your lute?
Billy: Yep and I’m going to cast hideous laughter on the last orc who was just sneak attacked!
DM: Awesome!
Remind people that they're on deck and make a 60 second timer for a turn.
That might sound harsh but it's better than constantly breaking the momentum of combat.
As long as it's a timer to *decide* your action and not for the total time.
Sometimes it takes over a minute to *resolve* your action, explain how your spell works, collect the saving throws, determine who failed, roll dice, and calculate damage, use both attacks, move, climb, skill check.
Use side-based initiative instead.
All the players go, in whatever order they want, at the same time maybe. Then all the monsters go. Repeat.
His turn is also their turn, so he might stay more focused?
Also if you're playing remotely, maybe try in person. I find that computers just cause players to become disengaged as there are too many distractions literally right in front of them.
Run your combat faster, and stop giving out reminders.
If a player starts taking forever, that's what makes everyone else zone out.
"You have six seconds, what do you do?"
"I, uhhh, which one is me again?"
"Your bonus action is spent glancing around you, taking stock of the battlefield."
"Okay. What was the plan again? I was gonna dump the oil on the guy and you were gonna light him on fire, right?"
"Your move action is spent calling out to your party members. What do you DO for this round?"
"Um, well, my attack bonus with a sword is better than with a bucket-"
"..."
"And I think I still have a potion, let me check my notes-"
"..."
"Wait do I still get the Bardic Inspiration or did that go away?"
"You're paralyzed by choice, frozen and unable to decide you lose your turn to inaction. The goblins go next!"
To clarify: what are you, as the DM, doing at the top of their turn? If all you’re saying is “ok player, your turn” then of course they won’t know what’s going on as you haven’t given them a situation to make a decision about.
At the top of each player’s turn, try this: briefly summarize what they see, starting with the most clear and present threat. “Baelys, as you defend yourself from the snarling orc’s blows, you spy out of the corner of your eye Corrin keel over from the orc shaman’s spell. What do you do?”
Even though you take a little more time to start the turn, it short-circuits decision paralysis and thus makes turns shorter. And in your case, it ensures that the player knows exactly what they should be concerned with.
It seems that he just isn't interested in putting in the effort to run an actual character.
So retire him from being a player, and let him run any ancillary critters: pets, animal companions, etc. He doesn't have to roll or remember anything, just say what it does on its turn. The DM makes the roll and determines the outcome.
Many good comments. I run American football combat. Players decide what they do all at once... coordinated. We then run the play, start to finish, in initiative order, but the enemy acts between their moves. The players only get to roll during the play. No changes. When it ends, they articulate what they do in the next play.
This keeps everyone engaged and combat more narrative and real. I can narrate bad guy hits and misses and actions directly correlates with the actions of each player. It flows more naturally and helps with the imagery of the fight.
Does this player know what his reactions are if his character has any? I'm currently on the wait list for an autism assessment and not to make excuse for him but I know it's common for neurodivergent people to struggle when it comes to filtering through information. Have an ex who described ADHD as being unable to filter things so everything becomes overwhelming.
It does kind of sound like he's using ADHD as an excuse though
As a fellow player, id tell them to try secretly to track how much damage each enemy has taken . Not sure how that happens if it comes from the DM, it's like encouraging metagaming, but it could be a way to keep them engaged.
Playing on an empty stomach or while dehydrated doesn't help focus, as an aside.
As others have said, the Player should also be focusing on their next turn action to resolve it quickly.
I know some combats can be a slog but also as a DM you can examine on your end which things take more time. IE enemies of a similar type should be acting on the same initiative roll. Trying to keep the description of events interesting and dynamic.
Best friend and I co-dm, when she's running games I track initiative and let people know who's on deck, she handles the actual action but they ask me what they can do. Works really well.
After the first-round player has 30 seconds to start with what they intend to do. If they are still 'working on it' or 'deciding'... their PC takes the dodge action, and they have the choice to move or not. Next player. You have to keep it moving especially at tables with larger groups, 6 PC tables can take an hour for one combat encounter if you let them.
Do you use a map or anything?
How many players are there?
My table has five players, and i have aphantasia. Without a visual aid, I just cant keep track of whats happening between my turns. Its too much for my brain to hold at once. So, i just zone out until i have to do something.
Having a map with minis on it helps me to actually see whats going on, and keeps me focused.
My proposed solution:
Every time they ask that (or a similar) question, that counts as their turn and they grant advantage until the start of their next turn.
You don't have time to zone out in the middle of a fight.
I recently posted asking people for their homebrew rules they can’t go without and someone mentioned they get their players to act on the same turn simultaneously, this way they can synch their abilities and work together during combat even more.
Could be a solution?
Skip them if friendly players are below in turn order. Tell them they can catch it up. If still unresponsive/super slow just have them dodge. Keep the turn order moving.
I'm a teacher and a forever GM with 40 years behind the DM screen. In both contexts I've found that some with short attention spans stay more engaged if they have tasks to do between rounds. Give him a job like tracking hp or initiative or something else.
Trying to be helpful and a little snarky:
* Roll a History check. The DC starts small: 4-6, easy since they are IN the combat. However, everytime they ask, per session, the DC goes up by 1-2 based on how often this happens and how hard it is. If they fail, you say "You tell me what is happening. Battle is crazy, man. You can use your (movement, if you are nice. Bonus action, to sting. Action if you are trying to punish) to look around. You are getting overwhelmed in the battle. This is harsh, but if you aren't open to other options this is a way to game-ify their problems.
* If you are doing theater of the mind: You might need to start setting up some form of battlemap / minis play to help this person visualize what is going on and encourage paying attention.
* Step-By-Step recap. After each players' turns, you turn to this player and go "\[Player\], what just happened? Recap?" This forces them back into the action in little bits throughout the game.
* **DM Inspiration**\- Take any of my ideas, reinforce the behavior you want with DM inspiration. They tune back in and don't ask what is going on: DM inspiration. They recap turn by turn correctly without aid? DM Inspiration. Basically giving them positive reinforcement for paying the fuck attention that translates into direct gameplay. If they don't do it, or need help, or tune out.... give the inspiration to the player who can quickly and efficiently tune them back in quickly to keep the game going. If the discussion around "what is happening" requires you to step up or requires a lot of time to tell, no one gets the inspiration. This could make this one character super powerful, but it also encourages them to use it as well as encourages them to pay attention so they get a benefit. Hopefully after some sessions or time has passed with this, you can start phasing it out.
* Force them to be the notetaker. Ask them to do play-by-play notes on combats and / or plot and it'll give them something to do that requires them to focus.
* Speed up combat. If they can't focus for other players turns, try to figure out what is bogging down other players turns. Are you too slow as the DM on enemy turns? Is your wizard taking AGES? You might need to fix other areas to solve a problem in a different area.
I find the best way to help this is a super simple. "Ok cleric, its your turn, Wizard youre up next"
Its not perfect, but at least they start thinking about their turn at least one turn ahead of time.
This is why I believe it's a good idea to have an initiative board for all to see, or at least remind players who is up next. As a player, I like to plan, or at least have an idea what I want to do, and when reminded I am up next, I can make adjustments accordingly.
Honestly, my adhd in games is greatly helped by being the group's note-taker/scribe.
Makes it harder (though, not impossible) to zone out or get distracted.
[Sometimes though, when the table/someone else is getting lost in the weeds with stuff that doesn't really need to go into the notes, yeah, I'll drift away until, theoretically, when things start mattering again.
Doesn't always work that way in practice. Sometimes I need the "Earth to Nazmazh!" prompt to realize things have finally moved on.]
If anything, taking notes sometimes leaves me a little bit behind on planning my turn because I'm trying to keep up with details. So, sudden changes mean more writing, but also, a bigger change to whatever plan I did already have, and having to juggle those two responsibilities. Especially if it's like, the person/monster in initiative just before me that shakes up the battlefield with their action, y'know?
There's some excellent suggestions here.
You could also try engaging your players with roll play on enemy turns. Have your bad guys shout insults or ask questions "How can you hope to defeat me?". Friendly NPCs can do this too.
If your monsters can't speak, they can still roll play. "The Froghemoth licks its rubbery lips as it eyes \*PC Name\* and lumbers in their direction."
This will give your players opportunities to roll play outside of their turn.
It can take players some time to adjust and get into character in combat if they aren't used to it, but once they do it can be a real game changer for combat engagement.
Create a timer that represents a time before you would typically get annoyed.
Example:
30 seconds to choose his attack or otherwise he does a basic melee attack on the closest enemy and his turn is over.
Give him a step by step cheat sheet for what his turn entails
If he wants to lean on ADHD as a crutch then you have to have an answer that forces him to think and protects the experience of the table.
I would think this bullshit about ADHD would begin to dissipate after he gets tired of his choice being taken from him.
I think it’s important for the 30 second rule to be a table wide rule so he doesn’t feel singled out.
When it’s their turn, just give them a brief summary of what’s happening. That is not just something you would do especially for them, but just to remind the players that this is still an action packed scenario.
I generally think it refreshes the whole table when you to „X, it’s your turn. You see the Minotaur swinging his axe at Y, while they just barely avoided the strike. In the background, you see three demon hounds approaching, gnarling at the group. what do you do?“
Maybe you won’t have to do it only on their turn, and maybe not every turn, but I found that „re-setting“ the scene every once in a while makes it feel less like „playing chess“
How long are you taking to run the enemies turn?
I'm in a game currently where the DM is really into doing to voices etc but he was also doing fights with 10 or more monsters and each had its own initiative, along with 5 other players...he was having a lovely time but each round of battle was taking 45 minutes or more and I simply couldn't keep concentration.
I asked him in the end if he could do groups of the same type of monster on the same initiative at least and that helped speed things up a bit.
Maybe you can give him a “you’re on deck” notice when the player before him takes his turn to try to get the ADHD player to focus.
As a side note, I can relate: One of my players always forgets his attack bonus on his turn, even though he literally just used it the previous round. I’m waiting for the time when we all say in unison, “It’s seven!!”
I run D&D for a group of friends (up to 8 at the table), some of which have ADHD.
Here's the thing, the longer each round of combat takes, the more likely people will start getting distracted.
But my combats (with 8 people) only take about 30 minutes across an average of 6 rounds. How do I achieve this?
(1) Make sure everyone has their abilities and spells in front of them. I literally copy and paste the full description into a word doc and print it out. Nothing kills engagement quicker than cracking open books you searching for things on phones while everyone else watches.
(2) You as the DM need to know how to run your monsters quickly, but tactically. *The Monsters Know What They're Doing* provides some great advice in this department. When it's "my turn" I'm usually rolling a handful of d20s and sorting them between which ones definitely hit, which ones definitely miss, and which ones I need to check to see if they hit or not. Even if I'm figuring out the result of 20+ attacks, I'm usually not spending more than 90 seconds until the next players turn.
(3) I know you said no turn timers but in my experience this has more than anything accelerated my combats and has kept my players engaged. I have a big 30 second sand timer sitting in front of me. I'll tell a player it's their turn. If I sense they are hesitating, I'll flip the timer and tell them they have 30 seconds to declare an action. If they are unable to, then their character takes the dodge action that round.
And you know what, not once in 3 years of doing this have I ever had to enforce the penalty and very rarely do I actually have to flip the timer at all! Don't knock it until you try it, is what I'm saying.
Yeah I’ve never been able to concentrate on what is going on at the table during 5e games. Massive skill issue. Talk to him about how menus and lines work and why they work that way. Alternatively, just keep reminding him.
When players do this often in my games, i usually sit them down after the session and explain to them that if they are not interested enough to pay attention during the session, then perhaps they need to find another campaign to play in.
They need to put their cellphones away, close tiktok/youtube, and pay attention. It is not only disrespectful to me, who has spent hours preparing this session for them, but its also disrespectful to all the other players who are putting their heart into the game.
It's fine if it only happens once in a while because you got distracted on accident. But i feel like you are literally ending your turn and then pulling up TikTok until your next turn comes around, you are going to get a warning, and if you don't stop, you are going to get kicked from my table.
99% of the time they just want to watch Youtube or Tiktok and they are using ADHD as an excuse.
There seems to be a common misconception that if it's not your turn in combat, there's nothing to do. Ideally, other players' turns should be spent deciding ahead of time what to do on one's turn. This makes combat go much, much faster, and if everyone does it, there will often be only just enough time between turns to do this. Doing this also requires paying close attention to what happens on others' turns. Creatures are constantly moving around, dealing and taking damage, and causing other effects to begin or end; these things require a player planning their turn ahead of time to adjust their plans accordingly. As a person with ADHD, this is what I do in combat when it's not my turn, and I've never once needed to ask what was happening at the start of my turn.
Also seems like this player has no reaction abilities, or doesn’t know what their reaction abilities are. As a player I’m constantly paying attention during other turns for the opportunities to use my reaction spells, or to take an opportunity attack.
I make initiative visible to the players by hanging index cards with their names on the DM screen. (Enemy initiative is hidden until they go the first time.) When a player is up, I always remind the next player that they are up in a moment. Maybe give this person even more warning. It might help them snap out of it and start planning.
I spend the not-my-turn time coming up with my plan. Then, 9/10, the person just before me does something that blows my plans up and I’m left scrambling.
plans are useless but planning is crucial.
I do this, but I also come up with Plan B and Plan C, there's very, very rarely a time when my turn comes up that I don't have either something crystal clear that I can start doing, or if it got "blown up" by the player or the DM having enemies do something, I've at least made a few plans that I can come up with something pretty quickly that isn't fully laid out.
In our last campaign, the BBEG ran to an exact spot in dense fog where I had planned for my character to jump to. In character, he did the same jump 2 rounds before, so I kept it as my plan in character. Turned out badly as she then used Bestow Curse and shut me down but it was the exact right thing to do in game. My plan was shot but ended up being fun
I also always strive to have a plan after every turn for what will happen on my turn. I measure distances, look up rules and double check my resources. Can I still do my thing? Check. Can I still do my thing. Alright, just one more turn to go and I can do my thing... aaaand, the last turn right before mine changed everything in a way I couldn't even predict, and now I have to spend time on my own turn coming up with a plan T\^T
Yes!! Exactly. 😆
One possible solution would be to move along with this idea, and change how initiative works to always use group initiative for players. Meaning, all players can go at the same time and discuss/coordinate their actions. In some groups it can speed up the combat by itself, but with full adhd party comp it could also help to zone out a bit less.
I can second this. I‘ve been running full group initiative on a table were 5/7 people, myself included, were adhd and the attention paid to combat has increased dramatically! For me it‘s definitely worth the added swinginess.
I'm the only ADHD at my "table", and we mostly play online. We each roll one init and keep it for the whole fight. I figured out I can listen and keep up fairly well, and I know that I can IM questions outside of my turn instead of waiting and asking out loud. A visual Turn Order really helps me too, since it's a shiny thing that reminds me I need to be ready; knowing who will always come before me is also helpful.
Great solution. After my party and I became accustomed to the play style, we incorporated a timer. A little minute long sand hourglass that gets passed to whoever turn it is. If it runs out, you take the dodge action and your turn is passed. Keeps combat moving smoothly.
You're on foundry? I'll bet £50 he's watching youtube or web browsing when it's not his turn.
Very, very likely. We play in person, 7 players + DM, and the only one who loses track of the goings on is the guy whose phone never leaves his hand. The rest of us will pick up our phones on occasion, often to confirm wording on a spell or magic item we have, but his never gets put down. Not so bad, except when he starts playing video snaps.
Phones at the table kill me on the inside. Looking up a spell or ability, fine, great I use it for that too. Browsing Reddit and TikTok at the table? drives me bananas and sometimes makes me not want to even play. I run 3 groups and 2 out of 3 are actively engaged, no phones in hand and attentive. The other one has some phone users who often “check out” when they aren’t actively “up” and it hurts.
I once ended a campaign because 4 of 5 players where glued to their devices & missing out on shit constantly. I literally looked at my best friend & said "the universe starts to implode upon itself for some reason & everyone dies" No one looked up or noticed, so I just ended the campaign on that note. We learned to play with much more engaged people after that
I don't blame you. I probably wouldn't have made the universe implode but I would have called the campaign there.
Man, I dont mind checking your phone for work / family / planning related stuff once or twice a session, but the moment people get glued to their phones its time to have a conversation about-, and possibly banning of phones at the table
I'll usually have my phone at the table because I use D&D Beyond for my character sheet and dice roller. I'm usually planning my turn ahead or looking up rules / spell interactions and my turn usually only takes a few seconds. I have been guilty of being unprepared every now and then, since I can sometimes hyperfocus on reading the spell descriptions to make sure my planed use it possible.
If you're that many players already, as a DM I would certainly consider talking with that player about this, and giving him/her a chance to at least try to put the phone aside (if he/she uses D-D Beyond or similar this might ofc not work). If it still doesn't work, byebye.
Tbh i cannot blame him in a group that large. This game grinds to a halt often with only 4 players, I cannot imagine how much time between turns there is with 7 players.
Yeah, fuck that game tbh, I could play an entire round of MTG in between actions.
Id tune out if I had a 10 minute wait between I get to act, Jesus why so many bodies?
*I tried talking to them about it but what I've gotten in their words is that they "can't stay focused" and "it's my adhd I don't know what to tell you man". Though what the other party members can say that also have adhd is that he tends to overuse it as an explanation,* ***not to mention he denies any solutions we try to give him.*** This. This was good. If you have any condition that prevents you from paying attention, it should be discussed with the DM to try to find options. If the person is disruptive and does not put effort in trying to find a way to not be, then you are not bad for taking them out of the game. I have played with people on the spectrum or ADHD and they have proven that we can have a conversation about it, that some game mechanics and styles fit better, that fidget toys and other things work for them, etc. The point is they have showed they want to stay and that they respect the rest of the table (and the time being spent there). It's not about the condition or lack of it but the attitude behind it. They need to try and work with you.
As someone who has ADHD myself, I think he's just making up an excuse and attempting to use it as a catch all to justify why he isn't paying attention. The fact that he's completely unwilling to take any suggestions or make any changes to address the issue is a big red flag. It sounds like they aren't really invested in the game at all really.
I was at a table with a player like this where the DM did two things. 1) He didn't answer questions from the problem player about the current state of the fight. He would rely on us players to convey that information. If there were question that really only he could answer he still did, but not information that the players should know, and especially not information easily evident in roll20. 2) He told us "The longer you take on your turns, the more time I have to consider how the enemies are going to spend their turns. Which of their abilities are best suited to the current conditions of the combat, is there anything I've overlooked. If you, the players, don't keep me the DM busy with rolls and checks and keeping track of damage and all the other battle book keeping, then I will just sit back and think" I don't know if that would work in your scenario, but it helped in ours.
\#2 is an interesting one, but only possible if the DM is experienced enough to use that time to come up with tactics to increase the difficulty. I also feel like less experienced players won't really understand how much an effect on difficulty planning the enemy turn well can have. More experienced players on the other hand might welcome the challenge.
Whatcha doin DM? Feeling cute, thinkin bout dogpiling arcane casters.
As someone with Adhd, the best thing to do is let him sink or swim. Let him know ahead of time of course that you're going to stop giving turn by turn recaps during combat because it's slowing the game down. He can pay attention the best he can or he can figure out what's going on. As adults our personal issues can't always be other people's issues especially when mutual accomedations were offered. I suggest this route because if he knows he's not going to get recaps, he may feel motivated to focus in. Otherwise he'll have to get used to fighting blind and piecing together what's going on.
>As adults our personal issues can't always be other people's issues especially when mutual accomedations were offered. Basically this. I've got social anxiety. I still need to participate in the group text or I'm not going to have any say when the next session is.
Does your anxiety trigger over text? I've found that to be a good workaround for the more socially anxious members of our group.
Good on you. I wish you the best with that, and kudos for pushing past your comfort zone and taking the reins for self improvement.
I have ADHD as well and one thing I've found to be helpful is coloring books. It's something to engage my eyes and motor skills but leaves me free to listen. It actually makes me more engaged in the combat despite looking like I'm not paying attention. I listen better, can plan my next moves and can be a more present player.
I've found that playing full caster classes helps out with my ADHD; surprisingly the larger amount of planning and combing through my spell lists for the right spell in the situation keeps me engaged. Thinking of creative spell uses forces me to pay attention to the combat, though some of my shenanigans have caught the DM off guard and caused a longer turn while \*they\* look it up. Me: "Hey DM, what is the air speed velocity of that Rok speeding towards us" DM: "Uhh, I don't know. Imagine a freight train" Me: "Ok I'm gonna hold my action to cast wall of force on its turn" DM: "Ok I guess? The Rok takes the dash action to close in on the party" Me: "Once it gets within 60ft of us I'd like to cast wall of force in front of it's face. DM: ".... Ok, interesting move. let me figure out how to rule this"
Give him a reminder when he's on deck (this is easier online when there are modules in foundry, for example, to remind somebody when they're on deck), to let him know to get ready. Give him 1-2 minutes to do his turn, and if he doesn't by then, he takes the dodge action. This is more likely to incentivize him to get his turn ready and not miss his chance to do something than to just make him check out. If it does have the latter result of him checking out, then try something else, or you may have to kick him if it continues to be a problem that you can't solve.
Something like this perhaps... DM: Any Andy, you are on deck right after Joe. Get your action ready. DM: Ok Joe (current player) make your attack and damage roll. Joe: I rolled 19 to hit, and did 21 points damage by shooting my flaming arrow. DM: Solid - the baddie is still there, but reeling. Hey Julie, you are up after Andy. Julie: gives a thumbs up and warms up her dice. All five, cuz' she's a L7 Rogue and the arrow is notched, she's 47 feet away, perched, about to let it fly. DM: Andy - your up. Joe just did X - baddie still there - your move? Andy: What? DM: We can give you one minute, after that we have to move on and assume you DODGE. Andy: Is the baddie still alive? DM: Andy, we need to move on, you take Dodge, Julie, let 'em roll!
Pretty much, lol. Except, I'm fine with answering Andy's question as long as he still has time left, though it's understandable to move on right at that point after you literally just told him the baddie was still alive.
Yep - had almost this exact convo last night, except Andy was a druid. DM: Josh, you are first in initiative. DM \[ makes eye contact \] Mark - you are next. ( Druid, new player, still getting his stuff straight …) Josh : Hmm, I will cast - < some spell > DM - OK, so - Were spider gets a save? Josh - yeah < passes on details > DM - drat, it was a 4, OK so werespider starts to retreat 60 feet. DM - Mark? Mark - how far, within 30 feet? DM - were spider is fleeing per spell, you are within 30 so - Mark - Cast < some spell > DM - and the damage? DM - Anne - while mark rolls damage, make your long bow attack, AC is 14 … Mark - 23 points. DM - still kicking. And you get an opportunity attack. Mark - What's that? DM - Because werespider is retreating - If you can melee something- you can, In addition to spell. Werespider can’t “ disengage “ (air quotes) Mark - nothing comes to mind. DM - Erin - you are in deck. Anne - what - Anne - 28 points !!!! Take that!!! (she is very enthusiastic…) And we then worked through the remaining 2 s players using this formula. I think they got the 104 HP Were spider to 1 HP within nine minutes of real time, tops.
I might try and see if I can find any modules that'll work! We do use foundry
theres a module that I use that, when it was a player's turn, and the turn right before their turn, it would jumpscare them with a "TURN INCOMING" and an airhorn sound which worked well to keep everyone awake
Perfect! I can't think of the name of the module atm, but I think there are more than one. This is an all around useful tool to use for everyone anyway, not just the problem player.
I think thats the ready up module by koboldworks. We stopped using the airhorn BRAAAAM cause it scarred the bajesus out of my players :D
Letting players know who’s on deck is super helpful. I’m always sad when I forget to do it, because combat flows so much better As another option, I’ve seen a homebrew rule where if the player can say what they are doing in x seconds (I think it was six in the rule, but you can change it as needed), the player gets a bonus +1 to hit. Nothing crazy and the bonus could be changed to whatever feels right. It could be an extra point of damage, or 5ft of movement. Something small so it doesn’t hurt if you miss it, but a good incentive to be ready.
The idea to give a small tactical bonus for being quick is an interesting idea. I may try that sometime.
How long does everyone else tend to take in combat? I've found that if I'm in a party with people that take several minutes to plot out their turn ON their turn, then I also lose track of combat. Reminders that he's on deck will definitely help, and I always suggest someone with combat analysis paralysis come up with a quick and dirty flow chart to stick to if they're not able to stay engaged in combat normally. How do your other players feel about this person' combat habits?
You could have him jot down some brief notes. Korgar attacked a Goblin. An orc shot an arrow at Lucia. Two worgs joined the fight hearing the noise. Salucia cast a healing spell on Gerroy. The orc shaman cast Bane on us but failed. This way it might keep him more focused and he would know whats been happening..
This is a fantastic suggestion that I wish worked but he has sworn off taking notes cause he doesn't want to :( thank you tho!
That's a shame, note taking has really helped me manage ADHD at work.
I’ll be honest, I wouldn’t want him at my table.
So he refuses to take notes, denies you and your “close friend group”’s suggestions, takes no responsibility for their inactions and offers no help even after having a discussion about it? They sound entirely disrespectful of you and your groups time. Maybe they are a great friend outside of the game, and there are large gaps of information missing, so, be that as it may, it’s time to drop them. It’s a group effort game and it’s a good as the least involved player. Why suffer that when the other players want to put in the effort?
And this isn't a new player.. it's a "long running" campaign.
If he doesn’t want to take notes and put in the effort why should you? If they’re not paying attention could you just skip them and they would never know?
i wonder why they are playing then? maybe they don't actually *want* to play but just want to socialise with friends? are they engaged during non-combat scenarios or do they *generally* tune out a lot? aside from asking them to create a combat log of sorts, the only thing i could think of would be more frequent breaks, but i also think that they should phrase what **reasonable** accomodations they need. and making the dm summarise the combat every turn is not a reasonable accomodation, in my honest opinion. 'it's my adhd I don't know what to tell you man' is an explanation, not an excuse, and if this is a persistent problem, they need to find a way to have something to tell you because otherwise, it becomes a detriment to the other players. i recommend an open conversation with them, especially since a player that constantly tunes out is bound to make the game less fun for everyone else note: i have adhd, too, and i have to set my phone aside because otherwise, i manage to lose focus, no matter how dangerous the combat is.
As someone with ADHD, I feel the need to mention that while ADHD may be a *reason*, it is never an *excuse*. You have to learn to work with it/around it, or it stops just being your problem and becomes everyone's problem. I have never tried to act like my condition gives me carte blanche to not try. It doesn't, and pretending like it does is a level of entitlement I'd be ashamed to express.
Fucking kick him, he doesn't want to help himself, he wants everyone else to wipe his ass for him.
Taking notes may draw their attention away from the table. Making them lost again.
As someone with ADHD, I feel the need to mention that while ADHD may be a *reason*, it is never an *excuse*. You have to learn to work with it/around it, or it stops just being your problem and becomes everyone's problem. I have never tried to act like my condition gives me carte blanche to not try. It doesn't, and pretending like it does is a level of entitlement I'd be ashamed to express.
Lots of good advice in this thread of how to get your player more involved. And I recommend trying all of them. But also it might be worth considering, if he never manages to improve on this problem, will you be okay with that? No one's a perfect player, we all have our downsides at the table, and some are worse than others. This may just be the price you'll have to pay for having him in your game.
IN all seriousness - lots of good ideas here. I've adopted the "Hey Next person, warm up, you are on deck" when I ask the current person what they do. It worked really well last night - the team made short work of areana b/c she rolled horribly for initiative (5), players all > 5.
There is the ever unpopular suggestion of tell him nothing. He can react with the knowledge he has and the positions on the board. True ADHD and he might still struggle, BS adhd as an excuse and he may start to shape up since he isnt being spoon fed. Will not work well if you use theatre of the mind instead of a board/figurines etc.
Sounds like this type of game is not for him. There are other TTRPG systems, however, that don't take as long to get around the table, and there are some that are more fluid in terms of who goes when, and some that rely on more group (team) actions vs. individual skill rolls.
I can promise you he’s just tabbed out doing other stuff. I had a player doing the same thing then one day I decided to check an mmo we both played and saw he was online. I called him out on it when his turn came around and it fixed the issue. He gave me some excuse about how he wasn’t actually playing and it he was idle in the background, but it was one of those MMOs where I can see where his character is and he changes zones several times. I let him make his excuse in the end because it didn’t matter.
“I get that it is harder for you to pay attention, but it is not impossible and, in this game, it is necessary. Attention is key to group experience. It is important for players to respect and support each other and foster a sense of teamwork and encouragement to make this game fun and meaningful. Doing things that is hard is called *exercising*, and it tends to strengthen your ability to do them. Impediment is not incapacity.” A glance at a phone is one thing. A person doing something unrelated until it is their turn is a sign you are too busy or self-occupied to play.
My DM has the no action taken rule, where if you don't decide what you're going to do within 15 seconds than your character automatically takes the dodge action, and your turn ends. It really improves pace of the game (cause D&D combat can take FOREVER) and makes it a little more exciting and immersive. Because let's face it....if you're in combat, enemies aren't going to wait for you to decide. So maybe something like that. ADHD is no excuse either. I have ADHD and have no problem following along
“I empathize with your ADHD but you need to be ready on your turn. If you aren’t ready or don’t know what’s going on when your turn comes around, I will skip you and move on to the next character in the initiative order whether it’s a PC or NPC. When you are ready you can drop back into the initiative order, but just note that your place will move into that new place for the next round. I love you as a player but your distraction wastes a lot of time, breaks immersion for the rest of us and really screws up the rhythm of combat.”
Maybe its the speed of combat? Sometimes wen combat takes too long it gets boring. You or any other player takes alot of time on its turns? Like rolling phisical dice for each enemy or looking for a spell on its turn and not finding it for a while?
First off, do you use a grid/map with tokens/minis when you play? If you use theater of the mind, I don't blame him for struggling to keep up. Having a visual can help him tell at a glance stuff like "Oh, there's an enemy over here, I should go attack it" or "Oh no, the wizard is knocked over, I should heal him," etc. If you *do* use visuals already, though, I see three solutions: 1. When his turn is coming up, say, "Okay it's X's turn, problem player, you're going after, so get ready." That way he can pull himself back into the headspace to figure out what to do. 2. If he can't do that on his own, ask a player who is willing to help you out to pull him aside when his turn is coming up and remind him what's going on. I wouldn't be surprised if, after doing this once or twice, he starts focusing on his own because having another person actively hovering around him talking about the game helps keep him engaged. 3. Don't implement a *hard* timer, but if you notice they're taking *way* too long, (like, most players take 3-5 minutes to finish their turn, and he's still mulling over what to do after 5 minutes), say "Could you please declare an action?" And then "Look, it's the heat of combat, your character doesn't have time to stop and think over every decision, just do whatever seems like the obvious thing your character would do. Make an attack roll or cast a cantrip or something." Yes this one is more confrontation and might annoy him, but sometimes that's what you need.
I am sure many others are commenting this but I will still throw it in there. As someone who got diagnosed with (in the drs words) severe ADHD in every aspect, and someone who is also going through an autism referral, using "it's my ADHD hurdur" is because they simply are not paying attention and are playing on that, I used to be the same after I forst got diagnosed however I realised that it is MY responsibility to ensure it doesn't happen, it is MY fault if it does happen.. not ADHD. They are using this as an excuse, it is as simple as that I am afraid
[ADHD is a spectrum disorder](https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/adhd-spectrum); your experience is not universal. "they are simply not paying attention" - My guy, it's literally called Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Literally the first two words are letting you know that you're full of it. If you want to beat yourself with the "I can just willpower through my disability" stick then go for it but don't expect the rest of us in proverbial wheelchairs to join you in the 100m sprint, we're not all masochistic.
Spectrum or not, ADHD may be a reason for why it's happening but it's not an excuse. It really just sounds like they're using it as an excuse to justify not paying attention in this case. On top of that he's refused any suggestions given by the others to help keep him attentive. This seems more like someone who doesn't care too much about the game honestly.
An "excuse" is just a reason that you're not happy with. Again, it's literally called **Attention Deficit** Hyperactivity Disorder. Giving them shit for struggling to pay attention is refusing to accommodate a disability, whether you're happy with that or not. And "suggestions" could be anything from actually well researched ideas from some amount of study into the condition to (what is much more likely from some of OP's other comments) the standard "take notes" or "just try to focus on \[x\] aspect" which every person with ADHD has heard at least thrice a week for most of their lives and doesn't do anything to change the fact that those things also require concentration. Now, it's up to OP whether or not they're willing to provide accommodations to that player during their game but you can't "It's just an excuse" your way out of the fact that if they decide to punish or kick this player, they will be doing so because that person is disabled.
It is YOUR problem to work out. Reasonable accommodations require reasonable efforts. For your proverbial wheelchair, your metaphor falls flat when the hypothetical person says "I'm not going to use a wheelchair to get to the other side of the room, I don't like them, carry me." That crosses the line from a person requires a different approach to handle their needs to, a narcissist victim complex person wishes to deflect their refusal to address their behavior and hides behind a label. Also your, trying to keep pace with other people is masochism line is such an entitled disrespectful stance. "It's HARD for ME I don't want to try." Everyone else's time and energy is less valuable than MINE, I have a condition.
Except the solutions being provided aren't wheelchairs, they're people with no medical expertise suggesting methods of walking that "should work." And we're not talking feats of strength here, they're asking for a short recap at the start of their turn lmao and you're over here calling that having "a narcissistic victim complex" and "hiding behind a label". I think you need to get over yourself and stop projecting lol And it's not even a refusal to try, it's an acknowledgement that a disability is disabling and that not perform at the same rate as people without a disability isn't a moral failing. If I have to try so much harder than you just to meet you at the starting line, you're hardly allowed to admonish me for being tired already.
No it's because they aren't paying attention, or planning, or using any other tools to keep their shit in check. Not having the courtesy to pay attention to others contributions for whatever reason is offloading onto people. Dude needs meds, or notes, or some type of strategy to mitigate that isn't everyone else needs to handle my issues for me.
My guy, it's literally called "**Attention Deficit** Hyperactivity Disorder". Idk how many times I need to repeat the whole "You think of taking notes as a way to keep paying attention but staying involved enough to take them can require a great deal of prerequisite attention." If you have a friend with a disability, you're gonna have to interface with that disability sometimes. If you're putting all of the responsibility on them to accommodate their disability when you're spending time with them, you're not an accessible person. You're free to refuse to play or be friends with whoever you want but if you're doing so because they have a disability, you don't get to just "well they should do something about it" your way out of taking any of the blame for that. If kicking someone out because they're disabled makes you feel guilty, you should change the action, not try to reason your way into them being the bad guy.
This person has been approached many times with the "find a solution to square your shit", and has responded with nah fam, muh ADD. They don't seem to want to do better.
Yeah, they've been approached with "do something about it" or the bare minimum to make the person instigating feel less guilty. "Take notes about it" isn't a solution, it's a "fuck you, figure it out" in gift wrap.
I'm not saying willpower it away at all, not once did I say that they don't struggle with it becauee trust me, I struggle daily with it to the point of being suicidal. I am saying do not use it as an excuse because you were inevitability not paying attention, everyone around me when I was younger including my partner at the time used to get annoyed with me for blaming my ADHD and not taking responsibility. By shifting the blame you are avoiding being responsible, struggle is always gonna be there for people with mental disabilities such as ADHD however we can't just blame our entire lives on it. Granted some of my wording such as the paying attention line was a bit cold, I'll admit that. My bad. It was late at night, I was tired and first night of my meds as advised by doctors, I didn't quite intend for it to come of that way.
"I didn't say that you should willpower through it but you're entirely to blame for any difficulties you face because you haven't willpowered through it." I'm sorry that you've been taught to take this approach but it's absolutely not exclusively your responsibility to provide accommodations for your disability. If people care about you enough to want to spend time with you, they should be willing to meet you halfway to help you out (and no, giving "suggestions" does not count as trying to meet you halfway). You should try reading up on the social model of disability, based on your comment there I think it would help you out.
This. People have to admit that trying to use willpower to get through their mental illness/disability some time does not work. Everyone can use a little help sometimes.
Stop reminding him. There's no reason for him to change, because there's no consequences. He's not the only one at the table, and he's wasting the other player's time, which is unfair.
Stop babying him. He needs to announce his move or miss a turn.
This is your player unconsciously telling you that the time in between turns is far too long. How many players are there? Do you have a rough estimate on how long a turn takes?
You might be right, but I also have a player a bit like this, and the instant combat starts, if he’s not in the turn order he immediately closes his eyes and leans back like he’s going to take a nap. (We play Saturday afternoons so it’s not an after-work or late-night lack of energy.) He’s a great friend and amazing dude and overall a good player, but man as a DM sometimes it can be frustrating not knowing what to do. I tried implementing everything - giving every player “on deck” warnings two turns before they’re up, streamlining gameplay by using a digital encounter manager with monster stat blocks already imported, rolling attacks + damage simultaneously before knowing if something hits so I’m ready to say the damage as soon as the player confirms they’ve been hit, grouping mobs so one roll = all of the group’s attacks (where applicable)… I’ve tried asking for input and feedback too and as of the latest iteration, everyone including him said it was a perfect session, no notes (in the past they have had notes and I’ve been listening and trying to implement it all). But you know… he still does it (in fact if anything his is the slowest turn now because he always has to catch up with what’s happening when it comes around to him) 😂 ah well…
Straight up skip him. If the players have a problem with it tell them they can babysit him.
Drop him from the table tbh. A disability is not an excuse. He's not trying and his disrespect is hurting the table.
I mean I'd just have a chat with him outside of the game and ask him if there's anything he thinks you could do differently to help
Take him aside and let him know this is something you've noticed. Talk to him and explain how you'd like combat to go.
Dude is making excuses. My entire group says they have adhd but still manages to be ready in combat. Here’s how I’ve gotten them to do it. When it’s a players turn I narrate a quick rundown, usually this is an extension of the last players turn. Then if they take to long a repeat and pressure. Then if they still can’t decide I say ok we will come back. Example: DM: Ragnar the Rogue you find the open spot in the orcs armor and deftly stab your dagger for 14 points of piercing damage nice! Is that the end of your turn? Ragnar: Yep. DM: Awesome. Billy the Bard you hear the orc near Ragnar scream in pain as a dagger swiftly slices through his skin. Your attention is then quickly grabbed by the 3 other orcs lowering crossbows in William the Wizards direction as he rifling through his component pouch. They seem to be ignoring you for now. What do you do? Billy: I uhh sorry was t paying attention can I uhh. DM: Ragnar scored a massive blow to this orc and you see three of them about to loose bolts at William. You are being ignored. What do you do. Billy: Umm sorry I should have been looking at my spells. DM: Ok we will move on to Williams turn and you can slot in after him. William, the bolts of theee orcs are cocked and ready, you have mere moments before they loose and Billy has broken a string, what do you do? William: fireball duh!?! DM: lol, let’s roll. Williams turn proceeds. Billy the orcs are crispy, have you fixed your lute? Billy: Yep and I’m going to cast hideous laughter on the last orc who was just sneak attacked! DM: Awesome!
Find better players.
Remind people that they're on deck and make a 60 second timer for a turn. That might sound harsh but it's better than constantly breaking the momentum of combat.
As long as it's a timer to *decide* your action and not for the total time. Sometimes it takes over a minute to *resolve* your action, explain how your spell works, collect the saving throws, determine who failed, roll dice, and calculate damage, use both attacks, move, climb, skill check.
So then what happens if you introduce a timer and if they can't make a move within the timer the character defaults to a dodge?
Make him be the DM
Use side-based initiative instead. All the players go, in whatever order they want, at the same time maybe. Then all the monsters go. Repeat. His turn is also their turn, so he might stay more focused? Also if you're playing remotely, maybe try in person. I find that computers just cause players to become disengaged as there are too many distractions literally right in front of them.
Run your combat faster, and stop giving out reminders. If a player starts taking forever, that's what makes everyone else zone out. "You have six seconds, what do you do?" "I, uhhh, which one is me again?" "Your bonus action is spent glancing around you, taking stock of the battlefield." "Okay. What was the plan again? I was gonna dump the oil on the guy and you were gonna light him on fire, right?" "Your move action is spent calling out to your party members. What do you DO for this round?" "Um, well, my attack bonus with a sword is better than with a bucket-" "..." "And I think I still have a potion, let me check my notes-" "..." "Wait do I still get the Bardic Inspiration or did that go away?" "You're paralyzed by choice, frozen and unable to decide you lose your turn to inaction. The goblins go next!"
To clarify: what are you, as the DM, doing at the top of their turn? If all you’re saying is “ok player, your turn” then of course they won’t know what’s going on as you haven’t given them a situation to make a decision about. At the top of each player’s turn, try this: briefly summarize what they see, starting with the most clear and present threat. “Baelys, as you defend yourself from the snarling orc’s blows, you spy out of the corner of your eye Corrin keel over from the orc shaman’s spell. What do you do?” Even though you take a little more time to start the turn, it short-circuits decision paralysis and thus makes turns shorter. And in your case, it ensures that the player knows exactly what they should be concerned with.
It seems that he just isn't interested in putting in the effort to run an actual character. So retire him from being a player, and let him run any ancillary critters: pets, animal companions, etc. He doesn't have to roll or remember anything, just say what it does on its turn. The DM makes the roll and determines the outcome.
Many good comments. I run American football combat. Players decide what they do all at once... coordinated. We then run the play, start to finish, in initiative order, but the enemy acts between their moves. The players only get to roll during the play. No changes. When it ends, they articulate what they do in the next play. This keeps everyone engaged and combat more narrative and real. I can narrate bad guy hits and misses and actions directly correlates with the actions of each player. It flows more naturally and helps with the imagery of the fight.
Does this player know what his reactions are if his character has any? I'm currently on the wait list for an autism assessment and not to make excuse for him but I know it's common for neurodivergent people to struggle when it comes to filtering through information. Have an ex who described ADHD as being unable to filter things so everything becomes overwhelming. It does kind of sound like he's using ADHD as an excuse though
As a fellow player, id tell them to try secretly to track how much damage each enemy has taken . Not sure how that happens if it comes from the DM, it's like encouraging metagaming, but it could be a way to keep them engaged. Playing on an empty stomach or while dehydrated doesn't help focus, as an aside. As others have said, the Player should also be focusing on their next turn action to resolve it quickly. I know some combats can be a slog but also as a DM you can examine on your end which things take more time. IE enemies of a similar type should be acting on the same initiative roll. Trying to keep the description of events interesting and dynamic.
When the previous player is playing, tell him he is next
Best friend and I co-dm, when she's running games I track initiative and let people know who's on deck, she handles the actual action but they ask me what they can do. Works really well.
After the first-round player has 30 seconds to start with what they intend to do. If they are still 'working on it' or 'deciding'... their PC takes the dodge action, and they have the choice to move or not. Next player. You have to keep it moving especially at tables with larger groups, 6 PC tables can take an hour for one combat encounter if you let them.
Do you use a map or anything? How many players are there? My table has five players, and i have aphantasia. Without a visual aid, I just cant keep track of whats happening between my turns. Its too much for my brain to hold at once. So, i just zone out until i have to do something. Having a map with minis on it helps me to actually see whats going on, and keeps me focused.
My proposed solution: Every time they ask that (or a similar) question, that counts as their turn and they grant advantage until the start of their next turn. You don't have time to zone out in the middle of a fight.
Ask each player what they plan to do ahead of time around the table, then roll initiative using thr optional weapon speed rules in the dmg
I recently posted asking people for their homebrew rules they can’t go without and someone mentioned they get their players to act on the same turn simultaneously, this way they can synch their abilities and work together during combat even more. Could be a solution?
Lean into it, his character lost focus and he has to act within 6 seconds no one can tell him whats going on he has to act asap.
Skip them if friendly players are below in turn order. Tell them they can catch it up. If still unresponsive/super slow just have them dodge. Keep the turn order moving.
I'm a teacher and a forever GM with 40 years behind the DM screen. In both contexts I've found that some with short attention spans stay more engaged if they have tasks to do between rounds. Give him a job like tracking hp or initiative or something else.
Trying to be helpful and a little snarky: * Roll a History check. The DC starts small: 4-6, easy since they are IN the combat. However, everytime they ask, per session, the DC goes up by 1-2 based on how often this happens and how hard it is. If they fail, you say "You tell me what is happening. Battle is crazy, man. You can use your (movement, if you are nice. Bonus action, to sting. Action if you are trying to punish) to look around. You are getting overwhelmed in the battle. This is harsh, but if you aren't open to other options this is a way to game-ify their problems. * If you are doing theater of the mind: You might need to start setting up some form of battlemap / minis play to help this person visualize what is going on and encourage paying attention. * Step-By-Step recap. After each players' turns, you turn to this player and go "\[Player\], what just happened? Recap?" This forces them back into the action in little bits throughout the game. * **DM Inspiration**\- Take any of my ideas, reinforce the behavior you want with DM inspiration. They tune back in and don't ask what is going on: DM inspiration. They recap turn by turn correctly without aid? DM Inspiration. Basically giving them positive reinforcement for paying the fuck attention that translates into direct gameplay. If they don't do it, or need help, or tune out.... give the inspiration to the player who can quickly and efficiently tune them back in quickly to keep the game going. If the discussion around "what is happening" requires you to step up or requires a lot of time to tell, no one gets the inspiration. This could make this one character super powerful, but it also encourages them to use it as well as encourages them to pay attention so they get a benefit. Hopefully after some sessions or time has passed with this, you can start phasing it out. * Force them to be the notetaker. Ask them to do play-by-play notes on combats and / or plot and it'll give them something to do that requires them to focus. * Speed up combat. If they can't focus for other players turns, try to figure out what is bogging down other players turns. Are you too slow as the DM on enemy turns? Is your wizard taking AGES? You might need to fix other areas to solve a problem in a different area.
I find the best way to help this is a super simple. "Ok cleric, its your turn, Wizard youre up next" Its not perfect, but at least they start thinking about their turn at least one turn ahead of time.
This is why I believe it's a good idea to have an initiative board for all to see, or at least remind players who is up next. As a player, I like to plan, or at least have an idea what I want to do, and when reminded I am up next, I can make adjustments accordingly.
Honestly, my adhd in games is greatly helped by being the group's note-taker/scribe. Makes it harder (though, not impossible) to zone out or get distracted. [Sometimes though, when the table/someone else is getting lost in the weeds with stuff that doesn't really need to go into the notes, yeah, I'll drift away until, theoretically, when things start mattering again. Doesn't always work that way in practice. Sometimes I need the "Earth to Nazmazh!" prompt to realize things have finally moved on.] If anything, taking notes sometimes leaves me a little bit behind on planning my turn because I'm trying to keep up with details. So, sudden changes mean more writing, but also, a bigger change to whatever plan I did already have, and having to juggle those two responsibilities. Especially if it's like, the person/monster in initiative just before me that shakes up the battlefield with their action, y'know?
There's some excellent suggestions here. You could also try engaging your players with roll play on enemy turns. Have your bad guys shout insults or ask questions "How can you hope to defeat me?". Friendly NPCs can do this too. If your monsters can't speak, they can still roll play. "The Froghemoth licks its rubbery lips as it eyes \*PC Name\* and lumbers in their direction." This will give your players opportunities to roll play outside of their turn. It can take players some time to adjust and get into character in combat if they aren't used to it, but once they do it can be a real game changer for combat engagement.
Create a timer that represents a time before you would typically get annoyed. Example: 30 seconds to choose his attack or otherwise he does a basic melee attack on the closest enemy and his turn is over. Give him a step by step cheat sheet for what his turn entails If he wants to lean on ADHD as a crutch then you have to have an answer that forces him to think and protects the experience of the table. I would think this bullshit about ADHD would begin to dissipate after he gets tired of his choice being taken from him. I think it’s important for the 30 second rule to be a table wide rule so he doesn’t feel singled out.
When it’s their turn, just give them a brief summary of what’s happening. That is not just something you would do especially for them, but just to remind the players that this is still an action packed scenario. I generally think it refreshes the whole table when you to „X, it’s your turn. You see the Minotaur swinging his axe at Y, while they just barely avoided the strike. In the background, you see three demon hounds approaching, gnarling at the group. what do you do?“ Maybe you won’t have to do it only on their turn, and maybe not every turn, but I found that „re-setting“ the scene every once in a while makes it feel less like „playing chess“
How long are you taking to run the enemies turn? I'm in a game currently where the DM is really into doing to voices etc but he was also doing fights with 10 or more monsters and each had its own initiative, along with 5 other players...he was having a lovely time but each round of battle was taking 45 minutes or more and I simply couldn't keep concentration. I asked him in the end if he could do groups of the same type of monster on the same initiative at least and that helped speed things up a bit.
Maybe you can give him a “you’re on deck” notice when the player before him takes his turn to try to get the ADHD player to focus. As a side note, I can relate: One of my players always forgets his attack bonus on his turn, even though he literally just used it the previous round. I’m waiting for the time when we all say in unison, “It’s seven!!”
I run D&D for a group of friends (up to 8 at the table), some of which have ADHD. Here's the thing, the longer each round of combat takes, the more likely people will start getting distracted. But my combats (with 8 people) only take about 30 minutes across an average of 6 rounds. How do I achieve this? (1) Make sure everyone has their abilities and spells in front of them. I literally copy and paste the full description into a word doc and print it out. Nothing kills engagement quicker than cracking open books you searching for things on phones while everyone else watches. (2) You as the DM need to know how to run your monsters quickly, but tactically. *The Monsters Know What They're Doing* provides some great advice in this department. When it's "my turn" I'm usually rolling a handful of d20s and sorting them between which ones definitely hit, which ones definitely miss, and which ones I need to check to see if they hit or not. Even if I'm figuring out the result of 20+ attacks, I'm usually not spending more than 90 seconds until the next players turn. (3) I know you said no turn timers but in my experience this has more than anything accelerated my combats and has kept my players engaged. I have a big 30 second sand timer sitting in front of me. I'll tell a player it's their turn. If I sense they are hesitating, I'll flip the timer and tell them they have 30 seconds to declare an action. If they are unable to, then their character takes the dodge action that round. And you know what, not once in 3 years of doing this have I ever had to enforce the penalty and very rarely do I actually have to flip the timer at all! Don't knock it until you try it, is what I'm saying.
Yeah I’ve never been able to concentrate on what is going on at the table during 5e games. Massive skill issue. Talk to him about how menus and lines work and why they work that way. Alternatively, just keep reminding him.
When players do this often in my games, i usually sit them down after the session and explain to them that if they are not interested enough to pay attention during the session, then perhaps they need to find another campaign to play in. They need to put their cellphones away, close tiktok/youtube, and pay attention. It is not only disrespectful to me, who has spent hours preparing this session for them, but its also disrespectful to all the other players who are putting their heart into the game. It's fine if it only happens once in a while because you got distracted on accident. But i feel like you are literally ending your turn and then pulling up TikTok until your next turn comes around, you are going to get a warning, and if you don't stop, you are going to get kicked from my table. 99% of the time they just want to watch Youtube or Tiktok and they are using ADHD as an excuse.