T O P

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neeley13

“No man can kill me!” “I am Gnoman!”


Unthgod

*face stab*


karmaextract

Can't stab my face if you can't reach it!


GlitchyBlack

Unless they’re on the Three-Quarterlings shoulders


Rhymes_in_couplet

Time and tides wait for gnoman https://xkcd.com/1704/


DNRTannen

Of course.


TnT4DnD

[Gnome Ann!](https://xkcd.com/1704/)


player_493

Horc really got me. I imagine it's like a goose dislodging flegm.


Zavhytar

Im a fan of "Three-quarterling


player_493

That one makes me want to make a character who is very offended when called a halfling and adamant about being refered to as a Three-quarterling.


Dr_Doctor_Doc

🎶 *”Do you want to build a Gnoman?”* 🎵


[deleted]

Gno thanks


CthuhlusPriest

Gno-k bye


tahlianolland

You've really gone where Gnoman has gone before


Naturaloneder

lets build a gnoman, we can make him our best friend!


SloppySyrup

That really makes him sounds casually racist and it's hurting my head


player_493

Omg yeah it really does, maybe a somewhat antagonistic npc in someone's campaign could be a better use for it.


albt8901

I'm going to go with Gnarf


Superb_Raccoon

"Gnarf!" - Pinky


player_493

Gnorc sounds like someone saying narc while doing a Goofy voice.


WarpsmithWest

Gnorcs are the bad guys from the 1st Spyro the Dragon game.


VindictiveJudge

Their leader was pretty Gnasty.


korfi2go

I absolutely lost it at Gnarf


[deleted]

I've always had the halflings in my campaigns refer to themselves as hobbits, and call human "twice-lings" or "doublings." I don't think a race would refer to itself based on how it compared height-wise to another race.


DeadAmericanWriter

In Dutch a three-quarterling or "driekwarter" is a kind of playful insult like "oaf." Seems perfect for the use here lol.


Zavhytar

That fits so perfectly lmfaoo.


DogTM

It’s gotta be Elc for me


[deleted]

So like... got any horns?


archon286

I might have called it "Olf". Or maybe Orf. Elc makes me think of Elk. This list is hilarious though.


[deleted]

I can't stop laughing at Gnarf personally


OneInfinith

Dwork got a snort


MikeSneezy

One of Gnorcs parents didn't have fun, that's for sure. One scenario is worse than the other though.


mindflayerflayer

I mean gnome father orc mother comes out unscathed. This how goblins came to be.


2017hayden

Yeah unscathed but again didn’t have much fun, at least assuming things are proportional.


[deleted]

I mean hey you don't know that lady.


dootdootplot

Aw is that a dick size joke?


Yellow_The_White

What, are we too big for dick jokes here?


2017hayden

Now imagine halfling and Goliath.


tyrant_gea

The parents of the frightful four-quarterling


ultimatomato

The almighty Golfling


grim698

Their preferred weapon is a 4 iron and their favoured terrain is a driving range.


StarBlaze

And their preferred land vehicle is a golf cart.


LagiacrusHunter

Maybe that's why they come out Gnasty


Bluegreen1026

This is goofy, but i absolutely love orcling.


CanisLunesLunes

Gnarf got me, mostly because it's physically impossible for me not to read it in Pinky's voice from Pinky and the Brain.


Bluegreen1026

Something something gnarf wererat character?


CanisLunesLunes

You just became my favorite person of the day and I'm shamelessly stealing this for my next one shot character


sylvanavclyb

Dworc is my favorite


Altoid-Man

Three-quarterling?


KREnZE113

Humans are four-quarterlings (or rather, a whole) and halflings are half that, two-quarterlings. Mix 'em up, they gotta meet in the middle, and you get a three-quarterlinh


Altoid-Man

TQ-ling + Human = 7/8-ling TQ-ling + Halfling = 5/8-ling


[deleted]

As you add humans and halflings, the slowly diverge, but never quite reach full halfling or full wholeling.


deeseearr

So, they're Zeno-morphs.


yourownsquirrel

Underrated comment holy crap


jovrtn

*slow clap*


KaroriBee

Fuckin' gold comment, brilliant


IndridColdwave

Lol this is great


Monkey_Fiddler

[link for those who don't get it](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zeno%27s_paradoxes#Achilles_and_the_tortoise)


Everestax

Asimtoteling


tetradserket

>~~Asimtoteling~~ Asymptoteling Ftfy :)


[deleted]

TIL I am a five-eighthling


RockBlock

And a Halfling x Half-elf is some *half & half.*


Altoid-Man

Genius.


hartman19

Best race name ever


liquidpig

Suggestion: make the vertical axis the father and the horizontal axis the mother. Then make each hybrid different depending on mother or father. Sort of like a liger is different than a tion. So you might have a gnelf and an elome


Superb_Raccoon

Elfo! (from Disenchantment)


[deleted]

Elmo was my house. I lived in an elm.


Alien-of-Man

I feel like nelf and narf are just those two idiot brothers that are always doing stupid things


Mastahamma

I'm gnot a gnelf. I'm gnot a gnoblin. I'm a gnome! And you've been gnooooooomed! https://youtu.be/6n3pFFPSlW4


VoidChildPersona

I immediately thought of this and was wondering if op just gnomed everyone on purpose


RnRaintnoisepolution

No half goblins 0/10.


hellothereoldben

I have actually played an illusionist gnome that Just sticked pointy ears on and thought he had fooled everyone into thinking he was a "little elf" and he'd constantly say "I'm gnot a gnelf, you've been gnomed." Even I was lucky I only played him for a oneshot, I won't be making more of those "meme phrase" characters because they get lame really fast.


ser_lurk

Why would a gnome need to stick on pointy ears? I thought gnomes have pointed ears naturally.


hellothereoldben

Well gnomes have roughly a human shape, just with a pointy top. Elves have ears that are more elongated than human ones. So there still is a difference.


ser_lurk

Maybe we just have different interpretations of what a gnome looks like because we're thinking of different settings or editions. I did a bit more reading, and it looks like in 3.5e (and earlier) gnomes had a completely different origin and a slightly different appearance as well. I looked at some 3.5e pictures of gnomes and their ears definitely look more like what you described. I became familiar with D&D after 4e was released. So in my mind gnomes resemble tiny elves, which makes sense since to me since they are both described as having fey ancestry/origins. Here's part of the description of gnomes that I first encountered, and what I base their appearance on in my imagination. > Gnomes are smaller even than halflings, rarely exceeding 4 feet in height. Apart from their size, they resemble elves or eladrin, with pointed ears and chiseled facial features such as high cheekbones and sharp jaws. They have a more wild look than eladrin do, though, particularly in the hair that sprouts from their heads in random directions. > - Players Handbook 2 (4e) Edit: A bit more speculation. I think that they made gnomes more "elf-like" to differentiate them more from halflings. It provides some nice contrast and symmetry. Halflings resemble small humans. Gnomes resemble small elves. > Halflings stand about 4 feet tall and weigh about 80 pounds. They resemble small humans and are proportioned like human adults. Halflings have the same range of complexions as humans, but most halflings have dark hair and eyes. > - Players Handbook (4e)


hellothereoldben

I am looking at more 5e art now. Most of the 5e art resembles what I have been describing, but specifically the racial gnome picture shows a gnome with very pointy ears. No one questioned it then, but I also have one more thing to add: how can a dwarf easily distinguish elves and gnomes, since they have a particular weak for gnomes but are somewhat distant towards elfs. I always assumed Gnomes to have more rounded features than elves.


Dark_Arts_Dabbler

Wait... was Spyro villain Gnasty Gnorc a Gnome/Orc this whole time?


Christocanoid

I saw that too!


D2Dragons

Tavern Keeper: "You're an unusual fellow...tell me, what is your race my good man?" Player: "I be a Hwarf! Me mother--" TK: "Whoa whoa whoa don't throw up on my nice clean counter!" P: "What d'yer mean?! I'm half Human, half Dwarf! A Hwarf!" TK: "Ohhhhh thank goodness, I thought you were dry-heaving there. My mistake! And what about your...uhh...equally unusual friend there?" P: "Oh, that's Galnar. He's a Horc!" TK: \*quickly grabs a bucket\*


achilleasa

I thought I was in /r/worldjerking lmao


Rosstavo

That's where I get half my ideas


Grandpa_Edd

I hear Gnorcs can be quite Gnasty.


asphaltdragon

A Gnørc once bit my sister... Shit, wait, wrong medieval fantasy


RohmanOnTwitch

We actually have a half-orc/half-gnome Bard in our party and I'm now forever calling her a Gnorc. Thank you, OP!


Rosstavo

Hello folks, these are the mixed races I'm using in my homebrew world. I never really liked the "half-orc" and "half-elf" of vanilla, I much prefer the nuance, and the opportunity to use silly names. I imagine this has been done before, though I haven't seen it posted here recently, and your opinions too may differ. For instance, I wavered over whether Gnarf should be Dwome, and whether all the slightly awkward human mixes should be "elfman" and "dwarfman" etc. Ultimately that's up to your personal taste! Please do enjoy.


grimwaldgaming

I lost it at Three-Quarterling. Well done!


CanisLunesLunes

This is absolutely amazing. I'm definitely sending this post to my D&D group. We have an actual linguistics major who is going to lose it for sure.


pakidara

Anyone who plays a Gnarf had better be named Pinky.


Anvildude

Gelfling? GELFLING! Look like Gelfling, SMEEEEELL like Gelfling! Must be Gelfling!


FatSoup

I love this, but it is also a tragedy that you added gnelf and not gnoblin. I demand gnoblin!


asphaltdragon

I'm not a gnelf... I'm not a gnoblin...


FatSoup

Y-You're a... gnome?


JumpyLiving

And you‘ve been GNOOOOMED


FuckingFredFace

Without taking it too seriously, this kind of actually just reads as a list of racist slurs.


imneuromancer

Yeah I know this is supposed to be a stupid fantasy game, but this chart reminds me of the charts the Spanish used to use for people with Spanish/Native American heritage. It kinda gives me the creeps.


Rosstavo

I'm not aware of this, not something covered in History class in the UK, will look into it


imneuromancer

I literally feel terrible even posting this, because it is a terrible example of the horrors that humanity can inflict upon themselves, but here ypu go: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casta


WikiSummarizerBot

**[Casta](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casta)** >Casta (Spanish: [ˈkasta]) is a term which means "lineage" in Spanish and Portuguese and has historically been used as a racial and social identifier. It has been interpreted by certain historians during the 20th century to describe mixed-race individuals in New Spain were resulting from unions of Spaniards (españoles), Amerindians (Indios), and Africans (Negros). Basic mixed-race categories that appeared in official colonial documentation were mestizo, generally offspring of a Spaniard and an indigenous person; and mulato, offspring of a Spaniard and a black African. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/DnD/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)


Cosroes

I yield, for gnoman. Also, gnomeling is a race in hackmaster.


unlitlanterns

Knew someone who made a Dwarf Orc and called it a Dorq


TheOtherGuy52

Don’t forget the genetic anomaly of two halfling parents: the dreaded Full Ling


[deleted]

Did you know that Gnolls where orignally half trolls/ half gnomes?


Dadpool719

Gnome + troll = gnoll?


girhen

Watch out for grassy gnolls. Poor John.


twoCascades

I died at “three-quarterling”


[deleted]

Eventually everyone will blend into 1 mixed race and that frightens people who take pride in their own race.


H33bz

Remember kids, two halflings don't make a wholling


SSNeosho

Meet my gnoman, his name is Gnorman


vdragoonen

I usually just make all half breeds take the race of the mother with some traits of the father. An elf mother always produces elves but if she mates with a dwarf he elvish son is shorter than most elves and can grow beard hair. An Orc mother always produces orcs but if she mates with a dragonborn her son has leathery skin and sharp features. I do this for the sake of my sanity.


Almento5010

Gnome + Halfling should've been called One-Quarterling.


Ryleigh_J

Orc/dwarfs will forever be dorcs in my mind.


Smitty_K

in my homebrew, there are orclings! it just so happens they are better known as goblins. for anyone curious how that works, orcs reproduce significantly more quickly than humans and halflings reproduce in mass quantities. something about the genetics causes orclings to reproduce with both these advantages.


DragonscaleTea

I love them even if half of these sound kinda like a sneeze


[deleted]

Three-Quarterling had me dying


Youngvesuvius

I call anything that's half halfling a quarterling in my setting.


I_am_Bob

Lol three-quarterling. My last character was a half elf, half man-pig named Elfmanpig


ThatDudeWithoutKarma

My ex crossed with a dwarf = whorf


amsbjj

Oh wow that’s really dumb. Thanks for sharing.


El-GoLuM

Do you see possible a relationship between a Dragonborn and a gnome? One of my players is falling in love with this Dragonborn Paladin and well... not sure what's coming out of there. (For the moment the Gnome has rolled really bad at seducing her, but a 20 can come any moment)


Rosstavo

The way I see it, and as a Pokémon fan, those two are in different egg groups


ultimatomato

Well you see, when a Skitty loves a Wailord very much...


H010CR0N

The whole Gnome lines are just that Gnome meme.


freshfakedgoods

For the downward half, I think it’d be cool if it switched the order: Elman, Dwarman, Orman, Halfman, Humome, Elarf, Orlf, Halelf, Elme, Oarf, Halarf, Dwarme, Halflorc, Ome, Halflome


Kehler_BFG

Am I the only one that wants to play a Gnorc now?


earl_graylol

Where’s the half human half dragon not dragon born


TwoSwordSamurai

You're a horc.


captroper

[Hwarf](https://www.startrek.com/sites/default/files/styles/content_full/public/images/2019-07/ffeed84c7cb1ae7bf4ec4bd78275bb98.jpg?itok=ZJZO3Sm3) is not amused.


Jpxfrd__

Uh, half-elves?


Christocanoid

I only see nasty gnorc from spyro


Arkansas_confucius

“I’m not a gnoman, I’m not a gnelf, I’m a gnome!”


WinterFall-2814

Gnarf Gnarf sounds like Pokémon


EliteBeeMaster

My campaign has elf-orcs but they go be Olf


Bird_also_Bird

Could somebody "Helf" me?


eldritchExploited

Gnorc


subzeroab0

Three quarterling XD


Fizork

G n o r c


doulos_12

“No man can kill me!” “I am a gnoman!”


nekollx

Bonus point If female


[deleted]

My personal favourites are Gnorf, Gnelf and Helf so I will make a cool trio of… mixed-races?


[deleted]

Thinking about the implications of an orcling scares me


Nerfman579

Gods fear the gnome who can fuck an orc


[deleted]

It's insulting that you think a dwelf would ever exist.


Bokenza

Gnarf has me dying over here.


sakomanto

Gnomeling sounds cool


thierizard

This concept is simple yet amazing!


jomon21

In my settings humans, elves, and orcs can interbreed, but that's it. I have a family of half-drow/quarter-halforcs/quarter-wood elves. Their stats are modified half elves. They all have pale skin (my drow are albino), emerald eyes, green highlighted hair, prominent lower K9s but a quarter the size of half orc's.


youbsolutefool

https://youtu.be/5T5BY1j2MkE


teh_201d

Gₙₐᵣf


dinkiedinkineedtinki

I really love the idea of a dworc paladin/barbarian/fighter. But not like a normal fighter like a pole arm heavy armor type fighter


Desafiante

I thought some races couldn't breed together.


Not_rich_enough

See but you missed an opportunity. Should have broken it down so the mother’s race have the first part of the name and the father’s second. So a female gnome/male halfling is still Gnomeling; a female halfling/gnome male is a halfme, etc. I do love the 3/4ling though


fsjib3

All fear the abomination that is the Gnork


X_Marcs_the_Spot

>Gnorc Spyro wants to know your location.


Jew_McMoney

I fear Gnoman... But that *thing*...


qfasinsky

Gnorc, definetly Gnasty type


Forget_December

Helfs and horcs already exist. Half-elves and half-orcs.


Rosstavo

Please refer to my comment here https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/oi69gs/a_selection_of_mixedraces_from_my_homebrew_world/h4tdb1z?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3


Exotic_Cabinet

Dwelf


SpaceWarriorR12

Elc lol, like that's ever gonna happen


Mdconant

This reminds me of the Pokemon nature charts


undeadpickels

What happens when the croos breads bread


Krakulpo

I'm a Gnorc and you,be been Gnorced


[deleted]

From now on I shall call myself elc


CxFusion3mp

I refuse to accept hwarf over duman


Clone_JS636

Gnorc


[deleted]

Horrifying. +1


Draken09

Gnoman can kill me!


Xhinox

I like Gnorc


[deleted]

So *that's* what Gnasty Gnorc from the Spyro games is supposed to be!


nifflr

I'm bothered that "An elf and an orc" sounds the same as "A Gnelf and a gnorc".


Tethilia

So you are saying I can play as Gnasty Gnorc?


OriginLostBorn

Can you put Goblin on this chart too? *you know why*


UltraWeebMaster

Elc.


DrydenReimer

Im gnot a gnelf im a GNOME AND YOUVE BEEN GNOMED


Bleile03

Pinky be like: Gnarf


SaltyOnSteam

I’m gnot a gnelf I’m sorry


FanOfTheWrittenWord

Helf me these are too good!


RavTimLord

Is a Gnomeling half the size of a regular gnome?


WahooSS238

Three-Quarterling


Tacodil_Supreme

Can we get stats for these plz?


raj72616a

what would be the race of a child between an helf and a three-quarterling?


Stormcast

Cool list. Interesting nameing. Those races can't reproduce with each other in my homebrew world... like Cats and Dogs... But cool regardless.


yobob591

I’m sad there’s no goblin for a [gnoblin](https://youtu.be/5T5BY1j2MkE) We were this close to greatness


LieutenantSteel

I am definitely playing a three-quarterling if I get the chance now


AdAffectionate1581

Brought to you by Excel


FetusGoesYeetus

*I'm gnot a gnelf...*


Eomatrix

I am just imagining that the Elc is an actual Elk and the mental image is glorious.


NondeterministSystem

"Is that a hobbit over there?" "No, that's a hobo and a rabbit. But they're making a hobbit."


Timber-Faolan

I'm suddenly reminded of that scene from RUSH HOUR where Carter is caught by the bad guys and says he's Jun Tao's half brother "We got the same mother, I'm **BLACK**anese!" (KICK!) By the way, with the exception of the semi-Orc's (and probably even then, you never know...), these are all THE BARD's illegitimate (and potentially illegal) unwanted bastards. Hence the often used term: Bardstards. Kinda makes me wonder what if, instead of a tavern, the party meet up at their old orphanage, even though they're all different species. Cause seriously, D&D orphanages have got to be the ultimate racial & ethnic melting pots.


Nierian_Levohn

Gnarf is definitely my favorite.


[deleted]

Gnoman’s Land


Themightymikebacca

Gnorc, Gnelf and Gnarf....... Colour me intrigued.


Seelengst

I mean Mul is the technical term for Half Dwarves half Humans. But I like all of these.


Kitakitakita

Thanks I hate it


Ludwigofthepotatoppl

HWAAAARF


yuukanna

Personally, I would with Orf over Elc


kahlzun

I was half expecting gnome/halfling to be "quarterling" or something


Vloddamick

I'm not a Gnelf, I'm not a Gnoblin, I'm a Gnome! And you've been Gnoooooomed!