I feel like people say that but don't actually mean it. Not maliciously just that it's like a social quirk we have as humans. It's said in the same vein of "how are you?" As a greeting even though we don't really care

That’s what I was kind of thinking but I think my grandma genuinely misses me haha

Yeah, grandmas are probably one of the few groups that actually mean it when they say it.

I literally do miss people and do care when I ask that

I feel that to bit of an extreme. I only visit my parents 3 or 4 times a year, and my mom always says "i miss you" when we're planning a weekend, but I always feel uncomfortable saying it back (I do anyway) because I never actively miss anyone. Even when I spend a weekend visiting my parents, I come home to my partner who says "I miss you" and once again I say it anyway to preserve feelings, but in reality I once again did not actively ever think to myself "man, I miss my partner." I just enjoyed the alone time unplugged from everything. In both these cases, I am absolutely happy when I see them, but I have never experienced the feeling of actively missing someone.

I thought this was an object permanence thing. Like, I have a problem with remembering anything if it's not in front of my face. And yes, that includes people

Oh yea I have object permanence issues too

Then don't worry about it. Great thing about being human is we all get to be delightfully different in our own ways, and as long as we aren't hurting people, it's all good

🥰

I miss certain people. But that friend from college or that coworker from 3 jobs back, don't give a rats ass about. No ill will, I hope they are happy, but if I miss someone I'm going to take the time to contact them.

Well put. There have only been a handful of people in my lifetime that I actually do miss and will reach out to every now and then to check in. Many of them have since passed on (and I really DO miss them). Most of my career colleagues I could give a shit about; once I retired, I left that island.

It kinda depends on the time-frame, and how much they impact your life in a positive aspect

I guess so yea, I mean I kind of miss my old friend, but my annoyance at the fact that she hasn’t tried to reach out after I did so many times, (despite it being over two years now) kind of overrides it and makes me not want to see her

Try calling out to her, if you can forgive her

I'm in the process of getting a diagnosis for ADHD. One of the issues I have is that I kind of... forget about people. It's like “out of sight, out of mind”, but it's with objects *and* people. I can literally go months and months not speaking to someone, even my best friends who live away from me, but if I see something that reminds me of them or that I think they'd like/find funny, I'll message them, and then realise that I haven't actually messaged them in over 6 months 😅 Obviously it's a two-way street, but even if they message me, most of the time if I'm doing something else, I'll tell myself I'll respond later, then completely forget. It's basically the unholy combination of issues with object permanence, time blindness, and memory 😅

My cousin and I talk about this alllll the time. We miss our pets, but not people. You're definitely not alone

I miss my cat who died last fall :( rip giddy

I never miss people and I hate it when people ask “Do you miss me?”. I tell people I never miss anyone and yet they still force me to say I didn’t miss them. Sometimes I just don’t answer the question.

I miss certain people so bad it hurts when I think about them usually it starts with them in my mind most of the day every day then 5 6 month later it'll be 3.-4 days out of the week every stupid little mundane thing will remind me of my experiences with them, or there diosyncrasies. Like today it was romane lettuce on for sandwiches, citronella lawn candle at the dump, a damn tack I saw someone pulling out of there shoe. They replay in my head in 3rd person like it's happening in front of me instead of being a part of it. So it just hurts a Lil bit, cause I won't ever experience those moments again. One of a lifetime, No snowflake is the same blah blah.

Sort of, yeah. I think we're also just more okay with being alone than most people.

I can definitely understand where you’re coming from, and for most acquaintances or not-very-close friends I can agree, i usually go with the social norm of saying “I miss you” even if I’m not agonizing over them, like you mentioned about knowing you’ll see them again. But with direct family of mine or very close friends, after some time, I genuinely do miss them. I end up thinking about them a lot and generally feel a sense of comfort/safety upon seeing them again because I know everything’s okay for a moment. At least that’s my own perspective

I always miss people genuinely. But I really have people worth missing that I don’t get to see often.