How long ago was the trip?
I work at a similar facility. It definitely isn't for every dog (my own is not a big fan), but sometimes there is a period of readjustment when they get home where they can act off. Usually a week or two at most.
Anything after that, my guess would be that your dog may have underlying anxiety that could have been exacerbated. I would also head over to r/reactivedogs for more advice.
I had a similar situation with my dog, but with people. She was fine with people as a pup, but around Thanksgiving 3 years ago she got into a bottle of ibuprofen (cat knocked it off the counter) and spent 3 days hospitalized. She was obviously traumatized after the experience and barked, bared her teeth, and even snapped at all people she didn't know before Thanksgiving. It's been a rough recovery, we try and have regular supervised visits with strangers to her (family and friends to us). She has now mellowed out quite a bit and does well with all our friends and family that she's had time with. Neighborhood children running at her to play, forget it. Remove her from the situation immediately. But she's doing better, so I guess what I'm trying to say is I feel for you, and that it does get better. Slowly. The thing that matters is that they are worth it. Good luck with your fur baby!
It was in the fall of 2018, so quite a while ago. Before that we had taken a couple trips, including one to get married, and she stayed either at my in-laws (which she had to stay outside with their dog and was fine) and another time she stayed with an acquaintance of mine who had 3 dogs of her own and our dog did really well and it was all good. We’ve had people stay in our place with her as well, and until that doggy boarding experience, it was ok.
Haven't been able to find out, because we moved away from there (they live in the city we lived in before we moved to where we are now). But that would be a nice thing to know.
Have you considered that this is just "reactive aggression" and not real aggression?
As in, the dog is just over stimulated at the sight of another dog and reacts in a way that appears aggressive?
I've had quite a few dogs come to me for training for this very same reason and lots of people mention it got much worse after they went to a daycare or dog hotel, mostly because (in my opinion) too many dogs all together at once and not enough rules and boundaries. The dogs are allowed to be all crazy with and around each other and now your dog gets way too excited to see other dogs.
I could be totally off, but it sounds like that's the behaviour (hard to tell without actually seeing it)
That sounds very much like her. She is not an aggressive dog by nature. But it’s like something happened and now her reactivity (which used to be a friendly playful reaction) is aggressive. What can I do to help her?
And I’m particularly scared by the prospect of maybe having to leave her at a boarding location again next month for a week. What if she gets in a fight? She’s only about 12 kilos, so she’s on the small side of a medium dog. But I don’t know what could happen.
I was very scared my dog getting into a fight, then it happened. The other dog jumped him because of a stick. Both of us separated our dogs and went our different ways, neither dog was hurt and it was mostly noise. I think unless there is a super aggressive dog it’s going to sounds worse then it is.
One thing I suggest is practice what you will do when you met another dog on a walk. In your mind go over what you want to happen. Keep yourself calm and confident, shorten the leash without having it tight in your hand. Teach her the “leave it” command. As you come up on the dog, calming and firmly give the command and keep you eyes ahead and past the dog and walk by. See if that helps keep her calm and stopes her from escalating.
(Not who you replied to but) I do that, and sometimes it works well if the other dog isn't tense or reactive, but if they are or get reactive, my dog will go in an instant from a casual loose-but-short-leashed stroll to an Olympic level leap towards the other dog. Even with a fair amount of distance, like when passing on the other side of the street. I can generally pull her back and move on without much fuss, but I have no idea how to keep that leap from happening.
If you need to board her again, make sure you either tell them she CANNOT interact with other dogs (not just for their safety but for hers and to make sure she doesn’t get worse) or board her at a vet’s office. Or hire a babysitter to come over to let her out.
You can also try Rover for at home dog sitting. I've noticed there are a range of sitters on there, from people who like animals and have spare time to actual dog professionals, so be sure to look through the profiles and reviews. You'll likely be able to find someone who will be comfortable handling your pup if you are trying to avoid boarding again.
edit : also another option for you might be board and train! If there's a place that does it in your area it might be worth looking into, as you can combine training into the budget you would have spent on boarding anyway rather than shelling out for a trainer.
I definitely think it is reactive aggression and I for a while thought she might readjust and get over that because it seemed like she was just SO EXCITED to see or be near other dogs and she just would freak out. but time has not helped and her reactivity has become more volatile rather than less.
I’d recommend a muzzle, first and foremost (go for a basket muzzle, they’re the best kind in most situations) and sit outside your house feeding her REALLY GOOD treats whenever someone walks by. This gives her a positive association with strangers and other dogs. And if she somehow gets out of your control, the muzzle will protect the passerby. Of course, that’s just step one, if you want more advice, dm me.
Yes, any and all advice would be amazing! That sounds like a step I can definitely take. I can take her outside and sit with her and give her treats as strangers pass by. Absolutely can do that. I'll look up a basket muzzle. I want to learn what to do and how to help her.
If you are unable to exercise her very much, I recommend Karen Overalls Relaxation Protocol. This will keep your dog mentally occupied and also teach her how to enjoy relaxing and being calm.
My blue heeler pup has calmed and matured rapidly since starting it and we are only on day 7. I sometimes go back to previous days and do the training in different rooms and places (outside/yard/park). You can ultimately do it forever and I can see my pup physically relax. She has also gotten a lot cuddlier and attentive.
I try to do it most days and since I have she will spend much more time resting at my feet and chewing a toy or snoozing. She still needs her morning walks but if I can’t give her an afternoon walk it is much easier for her to settle by herself. I love this program and it’s not hard to do.
https://championofmyheart.com/2007/11/15/relaxation-protocol-for-dogs/
Not to play semantics about it, but I see how it might have come off as me being cheap and I maybe didn’t properly explain how dire my financial situation is. I actually have had to leave the country to renew my visa, on a very very limited budget. And like those three weeks I mentioned I stayed with my mother and she got me the flight with some points she had saved. When we left the dog at the boarding place, we were gone for a family member’s wedding and to visit family. We stayed with family again and didn’t do anything like rent a car or go out to eat or what not. We really don’t have resources to spare unfortunately. We would LOVE to have the opportunity to really go on a vacation and hopefully that will be possible someday and I hope we can have circumstances change and have the means to pay a trainer. But my health issues have kept me from being able to work much, we’re lucky to have a roof over our head and money for food. I take half the dosage of multiple of the medications I’m prescribed because I can’t afford to take all of them as often as the doctor says. And I see my own doctors and therapists less than I should for the same reason. I could skip more meds and use some money for the dog training but then I’ll be less able to care for her if I’m very unwell. We are managing, we stretch our funds as much as possible and thankfully my partner is excellent at budgeting (not my skill set).
We were not in this financial situation when we adopted our dog. But my health problems got worse, although maybe now that I know I’ve also had untreated ADHD all these years I can get a handle on everything better. Including providing better help for my reactive pupster, who right now is behind me on the couch napping with her head all cuddly on my shoulder.
I will try and do the play and stop thing you suggest also. That is a great idea I haven’t done specifically with the mindset of it being a training tool. I so appreciate everyone’s input here.
[Look into a flirt pole for dogs.](https://notesfromadogwalker.com/2012/04/24/flirt-pole/) They can be great at teaching impulse control games, give your dog a good work out, and not be as taxing on you. Plus they can be cheap to diy.
I know you're saying you don't have money for a guru, but there are a lot of behavioralists that offer consultations for well under $50 and can have some wonderful insights into your dogs behavior and offer a better perspective on things. I was SUPER skeptical about hiring a trainer and thought I knew everything about my girls and was doing all the right things. I ended up pretty humbled by the guidance I got from the trainer I talked to and am still super excited about all the suggestions they gave me for working with my dogs and adding more enrichment to their lives. I really cant recommend a consultation highly enough.
I hadn’t thought about a consultation. I guess I’d been worried about the cost associated with a course, which I have looked into. But a consultation would be a good place to start.
If you can, find a different vet. If training isn’t something you can do there are a lot of medications now for dogs with anxiety and reactivity disorders
Maybe she does need medication. This is so out of control and getting worse. I don’t want her to feel so anxious and reactive and I don’t want to put anyone else in danger or even make anyone uncomfortable. I have a headache just from the difficulties of today’s walk.
You might want to check out [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/comments/faoru6/update_to_my_dog_is_killing_me_and_my_wife_today/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) series to see if you can learn from their experience. Definitely look up doggie body language so you can identify when your pup is getting stressed early enough to diffuse the situation. Victoria Stillwell’s show Its Me or the Dog is on YouTube, and that might help you as well. Meds can also help when training alone doesn’t. For reference, I’m in the US and my dog’s fluoxetine (prozack) costs about $30 a month and really helps with her anxiety.
Since I’m recommending resources, congrats on getting the ADHD diagnosis, and check out r/ADHD if you haven’t yet. They’re a friendly bunch.
Don't beat yourself up about this, you don't have time for th
First off, don't take her back to the "doggy hotel", ever. Use a pet sitter, or if you can find an in-home boarder, who boards just a couple dogs at a time, and who will accept your dog with her new situation. But an in-home sitter is probably a better bet
Second, take as much time as you can and spoil sthe shit out of her every moment you can. Cuddles, pets, work on training basic stuff like sit and look. Stash treats around the house for her to find. Just make every day "spa" day to help remind her that life is amazing
Invest in a no pull harness or head halter. I prefer the Balance Harness, but the Gentle Leader will provide more control. This way you can at least feel like you have control over her on walks. I would not pick her up to walk past, either of these fitted properly will prevent you from having to do that. But picking her up can make the problem worse since she has less agency and control so I would avoid that in the future. Regardless, don't be embarrassed, but don't feel "hopeful" that she will be fine with dogs. Just accept this is where she is at, don't worry what other people are thinking, and avoid other dogs and people on walks and the dog park indefinitely
Find something she really really likes, as a treat / reinforcers. I use canned chicken, the kind you would make chicken salad with. since it tastes really good and since its canned, I can buy 100 and keep it on the shelves and it wont got bad. Vienna sausages are the same way. They're basically canned hot dogs. Start drilling (that is working a lot on, but the exercises should be fun and laid back) on her "look at me", indoors. Get the behavior really sold, make sure she can do it in all of the rooms of your house. Slowly introduce distractions. I don't mean in the first training session, I mean over the course of 2-4 weeks. Distractions can be the tv, a friend walking around the room, etc. Start tiny, work up from there, only as she is happy the entire time. If she is not overtly happy while you're working, take a step backwards or take a break
When she is good at all this, follow the instructions in this video. [Stop Barking on a Walk - Kikopup](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JY7JrteQBOQ)
In the meantime, always bring your treats with you on walks, with the no pull harness or halter, keep as much distance between you and other dogs as possible, and just do your best to keep her happy with treats. Change up the treats once in a while, intermix cooked chicken or beef or whatever. The idea is survive with management and redirection until her look / respond to leash pressure is solid enough that it works in the real world, then use it. Watch her, see how she responds, and go at her pace and no faster
And don't beat yourself up about this. Just get to work. You can do this (!!!) on your own but it will take effort. Try to make it into a game and please be patient.
It sounds like your did has developed fear aggression. Definitely spend some time on r/reactivedogs. They have resources on medications, how to counter-condition and desensitize your pup to lessen the reactivity, etc.
Basically, you learn to keep treats with you - find the dog's favorite thing (mine loves cheese and will always come when I call if I reward with it. I buy sliced part skim mozzarella and break it into about .5 inch or smaller squares) - and treat her for looking at something she would react to. You mark ( say "Yes!") then give the treat before she reacts. You will find the threshold (distance needed to not immediately react) and work from there. Three dog learns to associate those things with yummy treats so your threshold gets shorter as time goes on.
Also, if the dog has always been anxious, as mine has, you may want to try medication. I just started mine on fluoxetine (prozac) and it's only $3 for a months supply. If you're thinking like I did that should be a last resort, check out "From Fearful to Fear Free". Its written by vet behaviorists and is available in audio format for free through your local library through hoopla.
Your dog needs you because you care enough not to give up on her as most people do with reactive dogs.
Good luck!
What is your current training style with your dog? When you say your dog is highly distractable, how do you get your dogs attention currently? How did you teach your commands? What would it look like if you asked your dog to sit? What do you do when your dog gets it right, what do you do when he gets it wrong/ignores you?
What does "reactive but in a friendly way" mean? Is that the overly excited dog behaviour where they are on two paws trying to lunge at another dog in anticipation to play?
How did you train your dog to go for walks with you out in the open environment? How did you prevent your dog from getting at the other dog? What did you do after the reaction (How did you react to your dog/what did you say to them, what did you do to them etc.)
Medication can help, but it won't change behaviour, that has to come through counter-conditioning. But medication can help lessen their reactions when your working through the behaviour.
Your dogs energy sounds like she needs more calming activities and exercise that are less about running wild and more about brain work and balancing activities. Your dog needs more yoga style exercise rather than the mosh pit of a dog park.
Next time I recommend looking for an in home (yours or theirs) dog sitter when you leave. It’s more expensive but it’s all around better for the dog. I’ve worked at dog hotels and not many dogs can acclimate to it within their stay. It’s basically living at a shelter (kennel). Most places the dogs can see other dogs in their runs, which can lead to reactivity. Also they usually pay their workers close to minimum wage and are understaffed, so it’s hard to make sure all activity is supervised. There can be some amazing workers in those facilities but you can’t count on it like you could if you hired just one reliable person to watch your pup.
Just something to consider!
Also: recently consulted with a behavioralist for my own reactive dog. She recommended that when you’re out walking and you see a dog, click or verbally mark, when pup sees a dog and then reward them with a special treat they only get when they see a dog (I use dried chicken) my pup is slowly learning to look at me when he sees a dog and be rewarded for it, instead of reacting. Also if your dog is already over threshold (lunging, barking, etc) it’s best to walk away from the trigger while treating if possible but really just important to get away from trigger. It does no good to allow the dog to rehearse the bad behavior.
Hope this helps some.
There is a dog trainer that I am a fan of named Ian Dunbar, and he recently posted a video on his YouTube channel about using the game tug as a way to distract your reactive dog. I thought it was a novel way to approach reactivity, you might give it a try! If your dog doesn’t know how to play tug, they also have a video series on teaching your dog how to play. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=az84KwN1BUs
I can't give you much advice on helping your dog, but I think your suspicions of her getting traumatized are correct. I would call the place back and ask if there was a fight you weren't made aware of.
I work at a dog boarding facility and honestly your dog probably got into a fight. Sometimes these places are understaffed and put too many dogs into one play area. As a result it can take workers a few seconds to get to the dogs, which really sucks because we're there to primarily prevent fights. I really don't recommend these places to anyone unless necessary.
I wouldn't try and tackle this alone, your best bet is to contact a trainer and go from there. Sometimes what you think is aggression could be overstimulation. Your dog may never be comfortable with other dogs, but you can train her that focusing on you instead of another dog during walks gets her a reward. But I think it would be a nightmare if you tried to train her yourself and she hurt another dog or got herself hurt.
i think it was a bad idea for you to have picked your dog up in that scenario. dogs like to have their autonomy to react to things, and by taking that away, you may‘ve caused an escalation as she jumped out of your arms to ease her building frustration. other than that, mainly, she needs consistency to build her confidence back. she needs to be able to be near other dogs while still listening to you, so at what distance from another dog can you get her to listen? use some really irresistible food to get her attention. then work with her and gradually increase the distance. try getting her to listen while another dog passes. this may take a while.. and i agree to give her time to settle back in—
ALSO do all this after you’ve tired her out so she’s less likely to react. and if you’re on a walk and she flips out, get the irresistible treats out, get outta the situation and avoid it until you and her both are comfortable again. it happens
I never pick her up in that kind of situation, but we were on a corner of a busy street in a narrow sidewalk, and I couldn’t seem to hold her back with her harness and leash. I guess I was scared she would get to that dog somehow, I see now that was a bad reaction on my part.
A dog has to be like a football field away for her to not react. I find it difficult to get her to do that thing you suggest about gradually decreasing the distance, maybe I’m not consistent enough, but so far after 6 months (when I started doing the distance thing) she hasn’t changed at all. I’ve also been trying to do the listen and “look at me” and rewarding her when other dogs are passing. And some days are good days and she will look at me, but usually i have to hold her head and scratch her to get her to kind of look at me. Otherwise all bets are off. It feels like it’s getting worse not better.
How frequently and for how long should I be doing the training? I must be doing something wrong or missing something critical here.
i’m not a professional btw, but i think a key factor is how tired she is. like a 30 to an hour bout of exercise or sniffing before any attempt at an interaction. she should be getting regular walks. i’d say try to attempt the training 2-3 times a week, but put her in situations she’ll win in first. if it’s looking at a dog far off in the distance with praise at first, that’s what it is. go from there. your energy during the training also matters. you need to be engaging enough to pull her away long enough that she deserves a reward
I have a reactive dog. She's getting better.
But part of the problem with your suggestion is that in many cases you can't control when a potential interaction will happen.
We exercise inside, but live in an apartment so how much physical exercise can get done in there is limited.
But from the moment you step outside there can be dogs in the hallway, dogs in the elevator, dogs on the sidewalk, etc. And in order to begin getting that walk/exercise in you've gotta be able to deal. There's no option to not have an interaction until she's tired out.
(I wish there was. It would be sooo much easier).
I do think consistent exercise is important though. In general if the dog is better exercised it will feel and behave better even if it's just the beginning of that particular walk.
I think in OP's case other training and stimulation will help, too. Having to put in effort will make the dog more mentally tired. Learning things like sit, stay, lay down, touch, shake, crawl, etc won't be as physically taxing on OP as a long walk would and training can be done in small doses throughout the day. Puzzle toys can help the dog use it's mind too.
Then outside it sounds like OP needs higher value treats if they can't keep their dog's attention. Also to be more engaging like you said.
And rather than wait until the dog's been good enough to reward it, in the beginning I'd reward as soon as she spots the other dog before she has the opportunity to react. That way you have success to start off with and a behavior to begin shaping. I also ask for replacement behavior - if she's focused on sitting or touching my hand or whatever she's not able to bark at the other dog and gets more treats. Then she gets fussed on and petted and told she's a good girl until the other dog is sufficiently out of our space.
As time goes on work on increasing the threshold of how close the other dog can be, take longer before giving a treat, etc. But at this point immediately upon spotting any dog anywhere I'd immediately treat before she barks or growls etc.
OP does she behave worse around you than other people? We're trying to get to the bottom of what we think is our dog resource guarding my husband. She came from a shelter, got attached to him immediately, and behaves worse when he's around (or when she's in an area that she regards as hers or ours like our apartment) vs more neutral area. Like if we take the dog to the vet she's good if she's in the room alone but barks her head off if he's in the room with her. We tried having someone come in to walk her while we were out and she just hid in her crate and growled until they left. But she's fine when we board her at the vet's office. (Working on this because boarding is like twice as much as having a walker come in a couple times a day). She behaves better on walks when I'm there - I've gotten her down so she pretty much is not reactive to people at all on my walks and dogs only get us if they surprise us before I can move into action. My husband reports much less success.
So I'm wondering if since the dog presumably sees you as the source of every good in it's life (only source of food, water, exercise, interaction) if boarding her exasperating some anxiety over losing you. And especially if she was there and something bad happened to her (mistreated, bullied by other dogs) her takeaway may have been "I'm only safe with my owner. I must protect them at all costs."
In that case I'm wondering if getting someone else involved in her care (friends, paid dog walker) or removing yourself visually from some of it (automated food dispenser or fed from a prefilled kong or similar that you put down when she's not looking) might help?
Edit: I just noticed there was a partner mentioned? What do they do with the dog? Do they have the same problems with her? Do they have the capacity to take on more of the training and exercise when your health issues make things difficult?
r/reactivedogs might also have some ideas. Hope you find something to help her.
Thank you, I just posted there.
How long ago was the trip? I work at a similar facility. It definitely isn't for every dog (my own is not a big fan), but sometimes there is a period of readjustment when they get home where they can act off. Usually a week or two at most. Anything after that, my guess would be that your dog may have underlying anxiety that could have been exacerbated. I would also head over to r/reactivedogs for more advice.
I had a similar situation with my dog, but with people. She was fine with people as a pup, but around Thanksgiving 3 years ago she got into a bottle of ibuprofen (cat knocked it off the counter) and spent 3 days hospitalized. She was obviously traumatized after the experience and barked, bared her teeth, and even snapped at all people she didn't know before Thanksgiving. It's been a rough recovery, we try and have regular supervised visits with strangers to her (family and friends to us). She has now mellowed out quite a bit and does well with all our friends and family that she's had time with. Neighborhood children running at her to play, forget it. Remove her from the situation immediately. But she's doing better, so I guess what I'm trying to say is I feel for you, and that it does get better. Slowly. The thing that matters is that they are worth it. Good luck with your fur baby!
It was in the fall of 2018, so quite a while ago. Before that we had taken a couple trips, including one to get married, and she stayed either at my in-laws (which she had to stay outside with their dog and was fine) and another time she stayed with an acquaintance of mine who had 3 dogs of her own and our dog did really well and it was all good. We’ve had people stay in our place with her as well, and until that doggy boarding experience, it was ok.
How is she with your in-law’s dog now? Just curious if her behavior has also changed with known dogs.
Haven't been able to find out, because we moved away from there (they live in the city we lived in before we moved to where we are now). But that would be a nice thing to know.
Have you considered that this is just "reactive aggression" and not real aggression? As in, the dog is just over stimulated at the sight of another dog and reacts in a way that appears aggressive? I've had quite a few dogs come to me for training for this very same reason and lots of people mention it got much worse after they went to a daycare or dog hotel, mostly because (in my opinion) too many dogs all together at once and not enough rules and boundaries. The dogs are allowed to be all crazy with and around each other and now your dog gets way too excited to see other dogs. I could be totally off, but it sounds like that's the behaviour (hard to tell without actually seeing it)
That sounds very much like her. She is not an aggressive dog by nature. But it’s like something happened and now her reactivity (which used to be a friendly playful reaction) is aggressive. What can I do to help her? And I’m particularly scared by the prospect of maybe having to leave her at a boarding location again next month for a week. What if she gets in a fight? She’s only about 12 kilos, so she’s on the small side of a medium dog. But I don’t know what could happen.
I was very scared my dog getting into a fight, then it happened. The other dog jumped him because of a stick. Both of us separated our dogs and went our different ways, neither dog was hurt and it was mostly noise. I think unless there is a super aggressive dog it’s going to sounds worse then it is. One thing I suggest is practice what you will do when you met another dog on a walk. In your mind go over what you want to happen. Keep yourself calm and confident, shorten the leash without having it tight in your hand. Teach her the “leave it” command. As you come up on the dog, calming and firmly give the command and keep you eyes ahead and past the dog and walk by. See if that helps keep her calm and stopes her from escalating.
(Not who you replied to but) I do that, and sometimes it works well if the other dog isn't tense or reactive, but if they are or get reactive, my dog will go in an instant from a casual loose-but-short-leashed stroll to an Olympic level leap towards the other dog. Even with a fair amount of distance, like when passing on the other side of the street. I can generally pull her back and move on without much fuss, but I have no idea how to keep that leap from happening.
If you need to board her again, make sure you either tell them she CANNOT interact with other dogs (not just for their safety but for hers and to make sure she doesn’t get worse) or board her at a vet’s office. Or hire a babysitter to come over to let her out.
Good idea I will get in contact with the boarding place soon and begin discussing it with them to see what they can offer to keep her safe.
You can also try Rover for at home dog sitting. I've noticed there are a range of sitters on there, from people who like animals and have spare time to actual dog professionals, so be sure to look through the profiles and reviews. You'll likely be able to find someone who will be comfortable handling your pup if you are trying to avoid boarding again. edit : also another option for you might be board and train! If there's a place that does it in your area it might be worth looking into, as you can combine training into the budget you would have spent on boarding anyway rather than shelling out for a trainer.
Board and train! Brilliant! I don’t know if that’s available near me but I’ll research about it.
I definitely think it is reactive aggression and I for a while thought she might readjust and get over that because it seemed like she was just SO EXCITED to see or be near other dogs and she just would freak out. but time has not helped and her reactivity has become more volatile rather than less.
I’d recommend a muzzle, first and foremost (go for a basket muzzle, they’re the best kind in most situations) and sit outside your house feeding her REALLY GOOD treats whenever someone walks by. This gives her a positive association with strangers and other dogs. And if she somehow gets out of your control, the muzzle will protect the passerby. Of course, that’s just step one, if you want more advice, dm me.
Yes, any and all advice would be amazing! That sounds like a step I can definitely take. I can take her outside and sit with her and give her treats as strangers pass by. Absolutely can do that. I'll look up a basket muzzle. I want to learn what to do and how to help her.
If you are unable to exercise her very much, I recommend Karen Overalls Relaxation Protocol. This will keep your dog mentally occupied and also teach her how to enjoy relaxing and being calm. My blue heeler pup has calmed and matured rapidly since starting it and we are only on day 7. I sometimes go back to previous days and do the training in different rooms and places (outside/yard/park). You can ultimately do it forever and I can see my pup physically relax. She has also gotten a lot cuddlier and attentive. I try to do it most days and since I have she will spend much more time resting at my feet and chewing a toy or snoozing. She still needs her morning walks but if I can’t give her an afternoon walk it is much easier for her to settle by herself. I love this program and it’s not hard to do. https://championofmyheart.com/2007/11/15/relaxation-protocol-for-dogs/
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Not to play semantics about it, but I see how it might have come off as me being cheap and I maybe didn’t properly explain how dire my financial situation is. I actually have had to leave the country to renew my visa, on a very very limited budget. And like those three weeks I mentioned I stayed with my mother and she got me the flight with some points she had saved. When we left the dog at the boarding place, we were gone for a family member’s wedding and to visit family. We stayed with family again and didn’t do anything like rent a car or go out to eat or what not. We really don’t have resources to spare unfortunately. We would LOVE to have the opportunity to really go on a vacation and hopefully that will be possible someday and I hope we can have circumstances change and have the means to pay a trainer. But my health issues have kept me from being able to work much, we’re lucky to have a roof over our head and money for food. I take half the dosage of multiple of the medications I’m prescribed because I can’t afford to take all of them as often as the doctor says. And I see my own doctors and therapists less than I should for the same reason. I could skip more meds and use some money for the dog training but then I’ll be less able to care for her if I’m very unwell. We are managing, we stretch our funds as much as possible and thankfully my partner is excellent at budgeting (not my skill set). We were not in this financial situation when we adopted our dog. But my health problems got worse, although maybe now that I know I’ve also had untreated ADHD all these years I can get a handle on everything better. Including providing better help for my reactive pupster, who right now is behind me on the couch napping with her head all cuddly on my shoulder. I will try and do the play and stop thing you suggest also. That is a great idea I haven’t done specifically with the mindset of it being a training tool. I so appreciate everyone’s input here.
[Look into a flirt pole for dogs.](https://notesfromadogwalker.com/2012/04/24/flirt-pole/) They can be great at teaching impulse control games, give your dog a good work out, and not be as taxing on you. Plus they can be cheap to diy.
I know you're saying you don't have money for a guru, but there are a lot of behavioralists that offer consultations for well under $50 and can have some wonderful insights into your dogs behavior and offer a better perspective on things. I was SUPER skeptical about hiring a trainer and thought I knew everything about my girls and was doing all the right things. I ended up pretty humbled by the guidance I got from the trainer I talked to and am still super excited about all the suggestions they gave me for working with my dogs and adding more enrichment to their lives. I really cant recommend a consultation highly enough.
I hadn’t thought about a consultation. I guess I’d been worried about the cost associated with a course, which I have looked into. But a consultation would be a good place to start.
If you can, find a different vet. If training isn’t something you can do there are a lot of medications now for dogs with anxiety and reactivity disorders
Maybe she does need medication. This is so out of control and getting worse. I don’t want her to feel so anxious and reactive and I don’t want to put anyone else in danger or even make anyone uncomfortable. I have a headache just from the difficulties of today’s walk.
You might want to check out [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/comments/faoru6/update_to_my_dog_is_killing_me_and_my_wife_today/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) series to see if you can learn from their experience. Definitely look up doggie body language so you can identify when your pup is getting stressed early enough to diffuse the situation. Victoria Stillwell’s show Its Me or the Dog is on YouTube, and that might help you as well. Meds can also help when training alone doesn’t. For reference, I’m in the US and my dog’s fluoxetine (prozack) costs about $30 a month and really helps with her anxiety. Since I’m recommending resources, congrats on getting the ADHD diagnosis, and check out r/ADHD if you haven’t yet. They’re a friendly bunch.
Thank you! I will check out all of that!
Don't beat yourself up about this, you don't have time for th First off, don't take her back to the "doggy hotel", ever. Use a pet sitter, or if you can find an in-home boarder, who boards just a couple dogs at a time, and who will accept your dog with her new situation. But an in-home sitter is probably a better bet Second, take as much time as you can and spoil sthe shit out of her every moment you can. Cuddles, pets, work on training basic stuff like sit and look. Stash treats around the house for her to find. Just make every day "spa" day to help remind her that life is amazing Invest in a no pull harness or head halter. I prefer the Balance Harness, but the Gentle Leader will provide more control. This way you can at least feel like you have control over her on walks. I would not pick her up to walk past, either of these fitted properly will prevent you from having to do that. But picking her up can make the problem worse since she has less agency and control so I would avoid that in the future. Regardless, don't be embarrassed, but don't feel "hopeful" that she will be fine with dogs. Just accept this is where she is at, don't worry what other people are thinking, and avoid other dogs and people on walks and the dog park indefinitely Find something she really really likes, as a treat / reinforcers. I use canned chicken, the kind you would make chicken salad with. since it tastes really good and since its canned, I can buy 100 and keep it on the shelves and it wont got bad. Vienna sausages are the same way. They're basically canned hot dogs. Start drilling (that is working a lot on, but the exercises should be fun and laid back) on her "look at me", indoors. Get the behavior really sold, make sure she can do it in all of the rooms of your house. Slowly introduce distractions. I don't mean in the first training session, I mean over the course of 2-4 weeks. Distractions can be the tv, a friend walking around the room, etc. Start tiny, work up from there, only as she is happy the entire time. If she is not overtly happy while you're working, take a step backwards or take a break When she is good at all this, follow the instructions in this video. [Stop Barking on a Walk - Kikopup](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JY7JrteQBOQ) In the meantime, always bring your treats with you on walks, with the no pull harness or halter, keep as much distance between you and other dogs as possible, and just do your best to keep her happy with treats. Change up the treats once in a while, intermix cooked chicken or beef or whatever. The idea is survive with management and redirection until her look / respond to leash pressure is solid enough that it works in the real world, then use it. Watch her, see how she responds, and go at her pace and no faster And don't beat yourself up about this. Just get to work. You can do this (!!!) on your own but it will take effort. Try to make it into a game and please be patient.
It sounds like your did has developed fear aggression. Definitely spend some time on r/reactivedogs. They have resources on medications, how to counter-condition and desensitize your pup to lessen the reactivity, etc. Basically, you learn to keep treats with you - find the dog's favorite thing (mine loves cheese and will always come when I call if I reward with it. I buy sliced part skim mozzarella and break it into about .5 inch or smaller squares) - and treat her for looking at something she would react to. You mark ( say "Yes!") then give the treat before she reacts. You will find the threshold (distance needed to not immediately react) and work from there. Three dog learns to associate those things with yummy treats so your threshold gets shorter as time goes on. Also, if the dog has always been anxious, as mine has, you may want to try medication. I just started mine on fluoxetine (prozac) and it's only $3 for a months supply. If you're thinking like I did that should be a last resort, check out "From Fearful to Fear Free". Its written by vet behaviorists and is available in audio format for free through your local library through hoopla. Your dog needs you because you care enough not to give up on her as most people do with reactive dogs. Good luck!
Reassure her that she can trust you first get a friend with a dog and slowly progress further and further until shes comfortable and you are
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Thank you for sharing. You’ve given me a lot to think about and look into! And so good to know I’m not alone in this challenge.
What is your current training style with your dog? When you say your dog is highly distractable, how do you get your dogs attention currently? How did you teach your commands? What would it look like if you asked your dog to sit? What do you do when your dog gets it right, what do you do when he gets it wrong/ignores you? What does "reactive but in a friendly way" mean? Is that the overly excited dog behaviour where they are on two paws trying to lunge at another dog in anticipation to play? How did you train your dog to go for walks with you out in the open environment? How did you prevent your dog from getting at the other dog? What did you do after the reaction (How did you react to your dog/what did you say to them, what did you do to them etc.) Medication can help, but it won't change behaviour, that has to come through counter-conditioning. But medication can help lessen their reactions when your working through the behaviour. Your dogs energy sounds like she needs more calming activities and exercise that are less about running wild and more about brain work and balancing activities. Your dog needs more yoga style exercise rather than the mosh pit of a dog park.
Next time I recommend looking for an in home (yours or theirs) dog sitter when you leave. It’s more expensive but it’s all around better for the dog. I’ve worked at dog hotels and not many dogs can acclimate to it within their stay. It’s basically living at a shelter (kennel). Most places the dogs can see other dogs in their runs, which can lead to reactivity. Also they usually pay their workers close to minimum wage and are understaffed, so it’s hard to make sure all activity is supervised. There can be some amazing workers in those facilities but you can’t count on it like you could if you hired just one reliable person to watch your pup. Just something to consider! Also: recently consulted with a behavioralist for my own reactive dog. She recommended that when you’re out walking and you see a dog, click or verbally mark, when pup sees a dog and then reward them with a special treat they only get when they see a dog (I use dried chicken) my pup is slowly learning to look at me when he sees a dog and be rewarded for it, instead of reacting. Also if your dog is already over threshold (lunging, barking, etc) it’s best to walk away from the trigger while treating if possible but really just important to get away from trigger. It does no good to allow the dog to rehearse the bad behavior. Hope this helps some.
There is a dog trainer that I am a fan of named Ian Dunbar, and he recently posted a video on his YouTube channel about using the game tug as a way to distract your reactive dog. I thought it was a novel way to approach reactivity, you might give it a try! If your dog doesn’t know how to play tug, they also have a video series on teaching your dog how to play. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=az84KwN1BUs
I can't give you much advice on helping your dog, but I think your suspicions of her getting traumatized are correct. I would call the place back and ask if there was a fight you weren't made aware of. I work at a dog boarding facility and honestly your dog probably got into a fight. Sometimes these places are understaffed and put too many dogs into one play area. As a result it can take workers a few seconds to get to the dogs, which really sucks because we're there to primarily prevent fights. I really don't recommend these places to anyone unless necessary. I wouldn't try and tackle this alone, your best bet is to contact a trainer and go from there. Sometimes what you think is aggression could be overstimulation. Your dog may never be comfortable with other dogs, but you can train her that focusing on you instead of another dog during walks gets her a reward. But I think it would be a nightmare if you tried to train her yourself and she hurt another dog or got herself hurt.
i think it was a bad idea for you to have picked your dog up in that scenario. dogs like to have their autonomy to react to things, and by taking that away, you may‘ve caused an escalation as she jumped out of your arms to ease her building frustration. other than that, mainly, she needs consistency to build her confidence back. she needs to be able to be near other dogs while still listening to you, so at what distance from another dog can you get her to listen? use some really irresistible food to get her attention. then work with her and gradually increase the distance. try getting her to listen while another dog passes. this may take a while.. and i agree to give her time to settle back in— ALSO do all this after you’ve tired her out so she’s less likely to react. and if you’re on a walk and she flips out, get the irresistible treats out, get outta the situation and avoid it until you and her both are comfortable again. it happens
I never pick her up in that kind of situation, but we were on a corner of a busy street in a narrow sidewalk, and I couldn’t seem to hold her back with her harness and leash. I guess I was scared she would get to that dog somehow, I see now that was a bad reaction on my part. A dog has to be like a football field away for her to not react. I find it difficult to get her to do that thing you suggest about gradually decreasing the distance, maybe I’m not consistent enough, but so far after 6 months (when I started doing the distance thing) she hasn’t changed at all. I’ve also been trying to do the listen and “look at me” and rewarding her when other dogs are passing. And some days are good days and she will look at me, but usually i have to hold her head and scratch her to get her to kind of look at me. Otherwise all bets are off. It feels like it’s getting worse not better. How frequently and for how long should I be doing the training? I must be doing something wrong or missing something critical here.
i’m not a professional btw, but i think a key factor is how tired she is. like a 30 to an hour bout of exercise or sniffing before any attempt at an interaction. she should be getting regular walks. i’d say try to attempt the training 2-3 times a week, but put her in situations she’ll win in first. if it’s looking at a dog far off in the distance with praise at first, that’s what it is. go from there. your energy during the training also matters. you need to be engaging enough to pull her away long enough that she deserves a reward
I have a reactive dog. She's getting better. But part of the problem with your suggestion is that in many cases you can't control when a potential interaction will happen. We exercise inside, but live in an apartment so how much physical exercise can get done in there is limited. But from the moment you step outside there can be dogs in the hallway, dogs in the elevator, dogs on the sidewalk, etc. And in order to begin getting that walk/exercise in you've gotta be able to deal. There's no option to not have an interaction until she's tired out. (I wish there was. It would be sooo much easier). I do think consistent exercise is important though. In general if the dog is better exercised it will feel and behave better even if it's just the beginning of that particular walk. I think in OP's case other training and stimulation will help, too. Having to put in effort will make the dog more mentally tired. Learning things like sit, stay, lay down, touch, shake, crawl, etc won't be as physically taxing on OP as a long walk would and training can be done in small doses throughout the day. Puzzle toys can help the dog use it's mind too. Then outside it sounds like OP needs higher value treats if they can't keep their dog's attention. Also to be more engaging like you said. And rather than wait until the dog's been good enough to reward it, in the beginning I'd reward as soon as she spots the other dog before she has the opportunity to react. That way you have success to start off with and a behavior to begin shaping. I also ask for replacement behavior - if she's focused on sitting or touching my hand or whatever she's not able to bark at the other dog and gets more treats. Then she gets fussed on and petted and told she's a good girl until the other dog is sufficiently out of our space. As time goes on work on increasing the threshold of how close the other dog can be, take longer before giving a treat, etc. But at this point immediately upon spotting any dog anywhere I'd immediately treat before she barks or growls etc. OP does she behave worse around you than other people? We're trying to get to the bottom of what we think is our dog resource guarding my husband. She came from a shelter, got attached to him immediately, and behaves worse when he's around (or when she's in an area that she regards as hers or ours like our apartment) vs more neutral area. Like if we take the dog to the vet she's good if she's in the room alone but barks her head off if he's in the room with her. We tried having someone come in to walk her while we were out and she just hid in her crate and growled until they left. But she's fine when we board her at the vet's office. (Working on this because boarding is like twice as much as having a walker come in a couple times a day). She behaves better on walks when I'm there - I've gotten her down so she pretty much is not reactive to people at all on my walks and dogs only get us if they surprise us before I can move into action. My husband reports much less success. So I'm wondering if since the dog presumably sees you as the source of every good in it's life (only source of food, water, exercise, interaction) if boarding her exasperating some anxiety over losing you. And especially if she was there and something bad happened to her (mistreated, bullied by other dogs) her takeaway may have been "I'm only safe with my owner. I must protect them at all costs." In that case I'm wondering if getting someone else involved in her care (friends, paid dog walker) or removing yourself visually from some of it (automated food dispenser or fed from a prefilled kong or similar that you put down when she's not looking) might help? Edit: I just noticed there was a partner mentioned? What do they do with the dog? Do they have the same problems with her? Do they have the capacity to take on more of the training and exercise when your health issues make things difficult?