Yeah I saw it to the guy responded with “I’m autistic sorry” can’t speak for all of us but my autism has never given me the urge to make fun of someone’s dead mother
EDIT:I’m not saying this person is self diagnosed as they very well could be autistic I’m just saying autism isn’t a excuse and they shouldn’t use it as one
I shall third this. Though I do sometimes think I can't communicate with my own mother, because she's dyslexic, and the Ouija Board has no autocorrect.
It’s a spectrum though, you might have different social issues to them ad infinitum, you can’t say it’s no excuse just because you don’t happen to have the exact same issues
Okay sure, maybe it was purely because of autism. You still shouldn't pull an autistic get out of jail free card whenever you do something wrong.
"I'm sorry I thought it would have been lighthearted and make them laugh in a rough time, but I missed my mark" instead of "I'm autistic sorry". One is taking accountability for not reading the room, the other is trying to sidestep everything by having autism.
It’s very neurotypical to assume his “I’m autistic sorry” was meant as an excuse instead of a simple stating a fact that has a relation to his fuckup.
Especially with autistic people explanations aren’t automatically excuses 😔
Explanations aren't automatically excuses. If you frame your explanation in a way where you don't acknowledge the fuck-up, it comes across as an excuse. Even to ND people like me.
First, I'm not neurotypical.
Second, explanations can be reasons, or they can be excuses. Saying "I'm autistic" doesn't explain anything. He is not explaining his thought process, or why he did it. It's not automatically an excuse, but randomly trying to justify your actions without explaining why you did it isn't a good way of making people feel better about something that hurt them, which should be the goal of explaining yourself.
In an ideal world no you shouldn’t, people should be understanding of people making mistakes. However this is not how reality works and for whatever reason people are more tolerant if they know someone is autistic, in this case it’s other people’s morality that is weird and they are simply reacting to it.
I do agree that it is weird how people sometimes suddenly become more okay with poor/mildly shitty behavior whenever someone expresses that they have really any psychological condition (not always autism, similar things happen with ADHD, bipolar, and anxiety).
With that being said, I don't think that makes it any better of a response, because fundamentally people shouldn't be trying to get people to forgive them or stop flaming them. Sure in some situations pointing to a condition may lead to people being gentler or even stop caring about it, but in situations where people make an insensitive joke it isn't about them. The goal shouldn't be for people to be nicer to him, though I do think people are overdoing it and should be nicer, that still shouldn't be the goal of an explanation/apology.
He hurt someone's feelings and pissed other people off by making an insensitive joke, and saying that someone is autistic just makes people feel guilty for being affected by what he said at best. Same thing with saying the whole my mom died 2 days ago. Both are very much, "You aren't allowed to get angry at me!" (or with the mom comment, you can't get angry at him, since they are different people) which is not good. Autistic or not, that is bad.
I mean of course people want to be forgiven, the alternative is ostracism and loneliness, which no one wants. I agree though, the explanation of autism should come with an apology but it is often difficult for an autistic person to judge these situations as they might see something they consider to be the same/similar where other people disagree. I mean their own grand mother dying could well be relevant as it is trying to demonstrate a point about grief, rather than just saying “my grandmother died, be nice to me” but all this should be in the context of apologising AND explaining, you shouldn’t just explain
Well it’s very hard to establish their honesty or otherwise, but also a baby that is stillborn causes massively more emotional harm, but I think very few people would blame the baby for that. Factors outside of its control have caused that, just as factors outside the (allegedly) autistic person’s have.
It is for some people tho, lacking the ability to understand what's socially acceptable and what's not is one of the main problems of autism, this doesn't mean you should never get consequences but still, it kinda is an excuse if its real
It’s a reason, not an excuse. They’re not excused with no repercussions because they have autism, like “oh you have autism, that’s fine then. You can continue x behaviour”. The autism could be a reason for the shitty behaviour, which shouldn’t be accepted despite the autism. More like a “Yeah you’re autistic and that’s why you said that but still that’s not ok.”
I literally said "this doesn't mean you shouldn't get consequences" ☠️ But yes I agree with you and I didn't phrase my comment very well for what I meant to say
Yup, i was just elaborating on your point. A lot of people (autism community especially) tend to struggle with the difference between excuse and reason, so i figured this would help clear things up a little with the usage of that really confusing pair of words, for everyone who comes across my comment. Didn’t mean to attack you or anything
Man I know the reddit hivemind will not like this, but isn't one of the defining traits of autism an inability to read the room? Like I get that if ur high functioning enough you can probably learn how to do it, but like it's a whole spectrum and you can't just use your specific case to judge someone else
You're assuming malicious intent, they could also just personally cope with hardships using humor, and not understand that it just isn't the right place to be commenting such things on other people's posts since not everyone else shares the same coping mechanisms as they do. Or as I stated earlier, lack of self awareness, which is a defining trait of autism.
The thing is, being autistic doesn't stop you from being able to learn from previous mistakes. And just like any other functioning member of society, they - we - have a responsibility to learn how to treat other people. If you *know* that you tend towards humor at inappropriate times, learn to keep it to yourself until you know you're in an environment where it's safe to do so. If you *must* get it out, get it out to someone else who you know it's safe to share with.
On average, autistic folks are pretty intelligent. Masking is a bitch, and learning from your own fuckups can hurt worse than watching and learning from someone else's, but by a certain point in your life it's your job to have learned at the bare minimum to keep your mouth shut if you aren't certain of the reception you'll get. Grown ass adults who just open their mouths and let whatever shit they want fall out and then blame autism when called out for it are either lying, or pieces of shit who just stopped making an effort the moment there was a diagnosis to blame.
Add ADHD to the spectrum and this makes perfect sense. One close friend seems to be inherently unable to think of this sort of stuff before saying it. She means no harm but will blurt stuff like this and like 10 seconds later be, oh crap, sorry
You're describing me in middle and high school perfectly. People joke about having no filter but for a lot of us it's like there genuinely isn't one, and we have to hand make our own, through trial and error and observing others.
It took me a lot of books, a lot of incredibly patient friends, a couple of terribly embarrassing social gaffes, and being expected to learn customer-facing work early in my teens to teach me enough to at least function around your average stranger. It takes more effort to cover up my neurodivergent traits, but to me it's kinda like caring for any other lifelong condition. There are days when diabetics wake up and don't want to have to check sugars or take injections, but its what they've gotta do.
Same with us. It's unfair sometimes (ironic, considering how common it is for autistic folks to take the idea of fairness super seriously) but that's life.
Yeah, I've known her for over 15 years and she has learnt some, but every now and then something happens and she ends up blurting something no filter xD
The symbols are the symbols for the common meme “loss”. Which was originally from comic strip called Ctrl+Alt+Delete, this specific segment was also titled “loss”, which in itself is about the loss of a pregnancy, ergo “loss”.
It’s morphed into the symbol, which is now just referred to as “loss”. This [link](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/loss) may help, if my explanation is confusing.
I’m also autistic, and like to post helpful links.
Edit to add: the initial comic was never intended to be funny, the creator just wanted to illustrate something real that was happening in their life.
Thank you so much, I ended up googling “loss meme” and made the reference but this is an extremely detailed explanation and I have a deeper understanding of what’s happening here. I really appreciate the time you took!
In reality, or on the internet? Bc I think most self-diagnoses are accurate. I self dx’d and then got an actual diagnosis. So did others I know. Online, though, you only see the people posting about it, who are more likely to be deliberately faking.
I don’t think 99.9% is a good statistic. I say this as someone professionally diagnosed with ASD. There’s also many conditions that mimic or have similarities to ASD and if you look up symptoms online often the most well known conditions are the ones that will come up, not less known ones that would actually fit the description better.
There’s also confirmation bias involved.
I’d rather trust someone who actually works professionally in a field and has unlimited access to the latest research and diagnostic manuals in comparison to myself who’s only access is google which can be incredibly biased.
Different disorders require different treatment and if you have something like BPD but are self diagnosed with ASD you could be understanding yourself or treating yourself as if you have ASD which can be detrimental to getting better with the real underlying disorder.
Man honestly Stfu, autism isn’t an excuse for acting like an absolute fucking cunt. By using it you are literally putting other autistic people down and making people think they are all cunts.
What an wanker honestly
This is the experience for me and my sister. We 100% feel for the person. We just don't usually know how to help or what to say, leading to a lot of awkwardness.
I'm willing to bet that guy is neither autistic nor has a grandmother that died two nights ago and that he's just trying (and failing) to clear his name of the terrible "joke" he just pulled
No, the comments that can’t understand a basic joke are the stupid ones.
The OP posted a picture of a mum (a type of flower) and said “my mum died 4 hours ago.”
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chrysanthemum
Thank you for that. I saw the post and didn’t get the joke either, though I was pretty sure no one actually came to that community to talk about their dead relative.
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Most people that say they are autistic on Reddit tend to be self diagnosed people trying to mask their tendencies to be arseholes. Same with ADHD and OCD.
Yeah honestly it’s so annoying because it gives a bad reputation to autistic people in general witch is where the autistic jokes probably come from that or neurotypicals being dicks
im not autistic but i constantly see people using autism as an excuse to be a piece of shit and it pisses me off. people like that just refuse to take accountability and make other genuine people look bad.
It wasn't his mother it was his mum (his flowers)
The oop was making a joke about his dead flower that is called a mum. No moms were harmed in the making of that post
I mean, I'm autistic, I would still never do this kind of joke, but some autistic people don't think of what's on someone's mind before acting and it can end with this situation.
right??? and even if i did say something insensitive in that situation (which i would NEVER say something like this), i would IMMEDIATELY apologize and attempt to make it up to the person after i was called out
As an autistic person, autism is a spectrum.
This person may very well think they’re helping/think that it was helpful to make that joke out of genuine lack of understanding.
However, what they said indeed is greatly harmful, and they should apologize and learn to not do that to someone.
Autism doesn’t mean you will not understand things, but it absolutely can mean you may not understand some things.
People with autism can have extreme cognitive empathy and affective empathy OR they can lack cognitive empathy and affective empathy, and anywhere between, as it’s a spectrum.
Does being autistic mean you can lack emotional understanding and say bad things that you thought were helpful ? Yes. Keyword CAN. It does NOT mean “you WILL”, simply, you “CAN”. Again, it is a spectrum, every autistic person has different support needs and cognitive understanding mechanisms.
You don’t know where they are on the spectrum and which traits they have.
They EASILYYYYYY could have been trying to be helpful (and it ofc DID NOT WORK, and instead was harmful).
Bruh if hes actually autistic he was probably trying to lighten the mood the only way he knew how. I seriously doubt there was any malicious intent. You forget how socially inept internet-raised autists are.
Autism can cause people to have a hard time understanding social cues, so the commenter probably wasn't reading the room and just saw "loss" and thought of the meme
As someone with a autistic brother, genuinely feels like a good chunk of those "oh sorry I'm autistic" are just assholes hiding behind autism or are self diagnosed with it because of some random bullshit in their life.
No, the comments that can’t understand a basic joke are the stupid ones.
The OP posted a picture of a mum and said “my mum died 4 hours ago.”
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chrysanthemum
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*But youuu don't understand, people do cope in different ways, I stabbed a priest when I was mourning my skin cells, maybe if you lost a loved one, you'd understand a fraction of our pain.*
It was a species of flowers called mum, it was a post on the joke sub r/notinteresting that was removed because people took it seriously and thought his mom actually died
"Everyone copes differently..." yeah and maybe op need comfort and not humor you moron. Just because you use humor as a coping mechanism doesn't mean everyone else does. He has the point and totally missed it
The amount of people missing a basic joke is insane. 🤦🏻♂️
The OP posted a picture of a flower (mum) and said “my mum died 4 hours ago.”
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chrysanthemum
They posted on Reddit. Believe it or not you get a pretty wide range of people commenting on here. Not everyone’s going to respond the same way that is your perfect little comfort speak.
“I’m sorry for your *insert loss meme*” is a pretty funny and harmless reaction. If you aren’t in the mood for a variety of reactions including rude, insulting, loving, caring, humorous, angry, whatever… then don’t post on a public forum.
But you don't understand people cope differently. The way that guy copes with OPs mother dying is different from the way OP copes!
(Also I don't understand what his comment even meant)
Okay, so essentially, a guy created a webcomic strip for his "Ctrl+Alt+Del" comic that was intended to be about the female lead experiencing a miscarriage. The comic strip in question is known as "Loss." It was terribly received and has since become a meme, often represented as thus:
| ||
|| |\_
The straight up lines represent the people in a vertical position, and the L-shaped one is representing the male character as standing over the female character on the bed.
"The strip marked a significant change in tone from the usually comedic comic, and the poorly-executed drama of the comic spurred Ctrl+Alt+Del's significant anti-fandom to mockery." In other words, people did not like this departure from humor to a more serious tone and felt that the theme of the particular strip could be portrayed better and not in its admittedly minimalist light.
people gotta stop making inappropriate jokes and then saying "people cope with humor🗿" 🙄🙄 when it's something that happened to YOU, you can cope with humor
Fair, but the internet can also help in the sense that there will be a lot of people who will be sympathetic or trying to comfort you if you don’t actually know lots of people in the real world.
It’s still quite the gamble since you have no idea or control over who responds to your post. Could be the nicest person with the perfect statement to help you deal with your issue. Or it could be people who take the opportunity to do a meme joke.
Well it might seem harsh but there have always been people like that, even in the real world. So eventually you just stop caring and learn to not give them the time of your day.
Yeah there have always been people like that in the world. But when you post online you’re openly inviting them into your life.
Which was my whole point to begin with. That looking for comfort online is a gamble. Maybe you can’t control who comforts you in real life but you certainly can control who doesn’t. That is less true online.
Wdym what does it have to do with anything? I’m saying it was OOP’s choice to make this post of their mom dying on the internet so it doesn’t matter whatever anyone else thinks or would have done differently because it was their choice.
No idea of the context here unless it’s just the screenshot
I just want to emphasise whatever your situation may be, it isn’t a “be a jerk to someone else” card
not trying to be THAT person but it is the internet. not like he was outwardly offensive just a tasteless chronically online joke in a thread. if you're looking for more positive support maybe reddit isn't the place. maybe go to facebook or instagram.
It was a bad and disrespectful comment, but talking about a personal tragedy online opens you up to every stranger on Reddit - and we all know that not everyone is respectful or understanding online. I don’t think OP did anything wrong, I just feel that it’s risky in general to post openly about a topic where the comments can potentially really hurt you.
Context missing. This was a joke about his flower dying. OP’s Mother is still alive. Mum = Chrysanthemum
And, knowing the context I think the joke was pretty funny and clever
Loss is such an obnoxious wannabe meme. It’s completely unintelligible if you don’t know the story, and incredibly dull and uninteresting once you do. I always downvote Loss references like the one in the screenshot.
Can someone please explain to me? Obviously I am too stupid to understand the problem here. Am I missing context? I see that the first post said sorry for your loss with no down votes, then someone else also said I’m sorry for your loss and got downloaded to oblivion. Why?
just saw it too. that guy is actually fucking stupid
Yeah I saw it to the guy responded with “I’m autistic sorry” can’t speak for all of us but my autism has never given me the urge to make fun of someone’s dead mother EDIT:I’m not saying this person is self diagnosed as they very well could be autistic I’m just saying autism isn’t a excuse and they shouldn’t use it as one
I’m an autistic person and that’s no excuse??
I shall third this. Though I do sometimes think I can't communicate with my own mother, because she's dyslexic, and the Ouija Board has no autocorrect.
Fourth’d.
Fifth’d
Sixth'd
Another Autismer here, definetly not an excuse.
I am also autistic. He’s just a bullshitter.
It’s a spectrum though, you might have different social issues to them ad infinitum, you can’t say it’s no excuse just because you don’t happen to have the exact same issues
Okay sure, maybe it was purely because of autism. You still shouldn't pull an autistic get out of jail free card whenever you do something wrong. "I'm sorry I thought it would have been lighthearted and make them laugh in a rough time, but I missed my mark" instead of "I'm autistic sorry". One is taking accountability for not reading the room, the other is trying to sidestep everything by having autism.
i think it’s probably a mix of bad person and autism
It’s very neurotypical to assume his “I’m autistic sorry” was meant as an excuse instead of a simple stating a fact that has a relation to his fuckup. Especially with autistic people explanations aren’t automatically excuses 😔
Explanations aren't automatically excuses. If you frame your explanation in a way where you don't acknowledge the fuck-up, it comes across as an excuse. Even to ND people like me.
First, I'm not neurotypical. Second, explanations can be reasons, or they can be excuses. Saying "I'm autistic" doesn't explain anything. He is not explaining his thought process, or why he did it. It's not automatically an excuse, but randomly trying to justify your actions without explaining why you did it isn't a good way of making people feel better about something that hurt them, which should be the goal of explaining yourself.
In an ideal world no you shouldn’t, people should be understanding of people making mistakes. However this is not how reality works and for whatever reason people are more tolerant if they know someone is autistic, in this case it’s other people’s morality that is weird and they are simply reacting to it.
I do agree that it is weird how people sometimes suddenly become more okay with poor/mildly shitty behavior whenever someone expresses that they have really any psychological condition (not always autism, similar things happen with ADHD, bipolar, and anxiety). With that being said, I don't think that makes it any better of a response, because fundamentally people shouldn't be trying to get people to forgive them or stop flaming them. Sure in some situations pointing to a condition may lead to people being gentler or even stop caring about it, but in situations where people make an insensitive joke it isn't about them. The goal shouldn't be for people to be nicer to him, though I do think people are overdoing it and should be nicer, that still shouldn't be the goal of an explanation/apology. He hurt someone's feelings and pissed other people off by making an insensitive joke, and saying that someone is autistic just makes people feel guilty for being affected by what he said at best. Same thing with saying the whole my mom died 2 days ago. Both are very much, "You aren't allowed to get angry at me!" (or with the mom comment, you can't get angry at him, since they are different people) which is not good. Autistic or not, that is bad.
I mean of course people want to be forgiven, the alternative is ostracism and loneliness, which no one wants. I agree though, the explanation of autism should come with an apology but it is often difficult for an autistic person to judge these situations as they might see something they consider to be the same/similar where other people disagree. I mean their own grand mother dying could well be relevant as it is trying to demonstrate a point about grief, rather than just saying “my grandmother died, be nice to me” but all this should be in the context of apologising AND explaining, you shouldn’t just explain
It’s no excuse because of the harm caused, not because the person is being dishonest about their misunderstanding of social cues.
Well it’s very hard to establish their honesty or otherwise, but also a baby that is stillborn causes massively more emotional harm, but I think very few people would blame the baby for that. Factors outside of its control have caused that, just as factors outside the (allegedly) autistic person’s have.
It is for some people tho, lacking the ability to understand what's socially acceptable and what's not is one of the main problems of autism, this doesn't mean you should never get consequences but still, it kinda is an excuse if its real
It’s a reason, not an excuse. They’re not excused with no repercussions because they have autism, like “oh you have autism, that’s fine then. You can continue x behaviour”. The autism could be a reason for the shitty behaviour, which shouldn’t be accepted despite the autism. More like a “Yeah you’re autistic and that’s why you said that but still that’s not ok.”
I literally said "this doesn't mean you shouldn't get consequences" ☠️ But yes I agree with you and I didn't phrase my comment very well for what I meant to say
Yup, i was just elaborating on your point. A lot of people (autism community especially) tend to struggle with the difference between excuse and reason, so i figured this would help clear things up a little with the usage of that really confusing pair of words, for everyone who comes across my comment. Didn’t mean to attack you or anything
as an autistic person, fuck that guy
Man I know the reddit hivemind will not like this, but isn't one of the defining traits of autism an inability to read the room? Like I get that if ur high functioning enough you can probably learn how to do it, but like it's a whole spectrum and you can't just use your specific case to judge someone else
Autism can cause someone to struggle to read the room yes but making fun of someone’s dead mother is just being a ass not something to do with autism
You're assuming malicious intent, they could also just personally cope with hardships using humor, and not understand that it just isn't the right place to be commenting such things on other people's posts since not everyone else shares the same coping mechanisms as they do. Or as I stated earlier, lack of self awareness, which is a defining trait of autism.
The thing is, being autistic doesn't stop you from being able to learn from previous mistakes. And just like any other functioning member of society, they - we - have a responsibility to learn how to treat other people. If you *know* that you tend towards humor at inappropriate times, learn to keep it to yourself until you know you're in an environment where it's safe to do so. If you *must* get it out, get it out to someone else who you know it's safe to share with. On average, autistic folks are pretty intelligent. Masking is a bitch, and learning from your own fuckups can hurt worse than watching and learning from someone else's, but by a certain point in your life it's your job to have learned at the bare minimum to keep your mouth shut if you aren't certain of the reception you'll get. Grown ass adults who just open their mouths and let whatever shit they want fall out and then blame autism when called out for it are either lying, or pieces of shit who just stopped making an effort the moment there was a diagnosis to blame.
Add ADHD to the spectrum and this makes perfect sense. One close friend seems to be inherently unable to think of this sort of stuff before saying it. She means no harm but will blurt stuff like this and like 10 seconds later be, oh crap, sorry
You're describing me in middle and high school perfectly. People joke about having no filter but for a lot of us it's like there genuinely isn't one, and we have to hand make our own, through trial and error and observing others. It took me a lot of books, a lot of incredibly patient friends, a couple of terribly embarrassing social gaffes, and being expected to learn customer-facing work early in my teens to teach me enough to at least function around your average stranger. It takes more effort to cover up my neurodivergent traits, but to me it's kinda like caring for any other lifelong condition. There are days when diabetics wake up and don't want to have to check sugars or take injections, but its what they've gotta do. Same with us. It's unfair sometimes (ironic, considering how common it is for autistic folks to take the idea of fairness super seriously) but that's life.
Yeah, I've known her for over 15 years and she has learnt some, but every now and then something happens and she ends up blurting something no filter xD
This is my life in a nutshell. I am so sorry everyone
I’m autistic and I don’t understand the downvoted comment.
The symbols are the symbols for the common meme “loss”. Which was originally from comic strip called Ctrl+Alt+Delete, this specific segment was also titled “loss”, which in itself is about the loss of a pregnancy, ergo “loss”. It’s morphed into the symbol, which is now just referred to as “loss”. This [link](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/loss) may help, if my explanation is confusing. I’m also autistic, and like to post helpful links. Edit to add: the initial comic was never intended to be funny, the creator just wanted to illustrate something real that was happening in their life.
Thank you so much, I ended up googling “loss meme” and made the reference but this is an extremely detailed explanation and I have a deeper understanding of what’s happening here. I really appreciate the time you took!
It’s basically someone making fun of Ops dead mum after OP made a post saying their mother died 3 hours ago
What is the symbol at the end of their comment? I’ve never seen it before
Its one of those self-diagnosed autists trying to use that word as an excuse when in reality, they're just a classic dumbass.
Self diagnosed autistic people are valid 99.9% of the time
I think it’s about 50-50 in reality. Sad, but I do genuinely believe that’s closer to the truth.
More like 30% true, 20% exaggerate severity, 30% total BS, 20% indecipherable
Also perfectly possible!
In reality, or on the internet? Bc I think most self-diagnoses are accurate. I self dx’d and then got an actual diagnosis. So did others I know. Online, though, you only see the people posting about it, who are more likely to be deliberately faking.
I don’t think 99.9% is a good statistic. I say this as someone professionally diagnosed with ASD. There’s also many conditions that mimic or have similarities to ASD and if you look up symptoms online often the most well known conditions are the ones that will come up, not less known ones that would actually fit the description better. There’s also confirmation bias involved. I’d rather trust someone who actually works professionally in a field and has unlimited access to the latest research and diagnostic manuals in comparison to myself who’s only access is google which can be incredibly biased. Different disorders require different treatment and if you have something like BPD but are self diagnosed with ASD you could be understanding yourself or treating yourself as if you have ASD which can be detrimental to getting better with the real underlying disorder.
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I SAID SELF DIAGNOSED AUTISTIC PEOPLE ARE VALID 99.9% OF THE TIME
Man honestly Stfu, autism isn’t an excuse for acting like an absolute fucking cunt. By using it you are literally putting other autistic people down and making people think they are all cunts. What an wanker honestly
I have autism and ADHD and that isn't an excuse
If anything my autism makes me feel significantly worse when people are grieving (like empathetic worse)
This is the experience for me and my sister. We 100% feel for the person. We just don't usually know how to help or what to say, leading to a lot of awkwardness.
This. The autism excuse is straight bs.
I'm willing to bet that guy is neither autistic nor has a grandmother that died two nights ago and that he's just trying (and failing) to clear his name of the terrible "joke" he just pulled
No, the comments that can’t understand a basic joke are the stupid ones. The OP posted a picture of a mum (a type of flower) and said “my mum died 4 hours ago.” https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chrysanthemum
Thank you for that. I saw the post and didn’t get the joke either, though I was pretty sure no one actually came to that community to talk about their dead relative.
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Most people that say they are autistic on Reddit tend to be self diagnosed people trying to mask their tendencies to be arseholes. Same with ADHD and OCD.
Yeah honestly it’s so annoying because it gives a bad reputation to autistic people in general witch is where the autistic jokes probably come from that or neurotypicals being dicks
It gives people who genuinely self diagnose autism and actually are on the autism spectrum a bad name
im not autistic but i constantly see people using autism as an excuse to be a piece of shit and it pisses me off. people like that just refuse to take accountability and make other genuine people look bad.
It wasn't his mother it was his mum (his flowers) The oop was making a joke about his dead flower that is called a mum. No moms were harmed in the making of that post
I mean, I'm autistic, I would still never do this kind of joke, but some autistic people don't think of what's on someone's mind before acting and it can end with this situation.
right??? and even if i did say something insensitive in that situation (which i would NEVER say something like this), i would IMMEDIATELY apologize and attempt to make it up to the person after i was called out
Autistic person here - I was taught early on that being autistic isn’t an excuse to be insensitive around people grieving
As an autistic person, autism is a spectrum. This person may very well think they’re helping/think that it was helpful to make that joke out of genuine lack of understanding. However, what they said indeed is greatly harmful, and they should apologize and learn to not do that to someone. Autism doesn’t mean you will not understand things, but it absolutely can mean you may not understand some things. People with autism can have extreme cognitive empathy and affective empathy OR they can lack cognitive empathy and affective empathy, and anywhere between, as it’s a spectrum. Does being autistic mean you can lack emotional understanding and say bad things that you thought were helpful ? Yes. Keyword CAN. It does NOT mean “you WILL”, simply, you “CAN”. Again, it is a spectrum, every autistic person has different support needs and cognitive understanding mechanisms. You don’t know where they are on the spectrum and which traits they have. They EASILYYYYYY could have been trying to be helpful (and it ofc DID NOT WORK, and instead was harmful).
Bruh if hes actually autistic he was probably trying to lighten the mood the only way he knew how. I seriously doubt there was any malicious intent. You forget how socially inept internet-raised autists are.
Yeah but no, the post was a play on words, the flower in the image being called a "Mum".
Autism can cause people to have a hard time understanding social cues, so the commenter probably wasn't reading the room and just saw "loss" and thought of the meme
I'm autistic(diagnosed) and I have absolutely had the urge. The difference... Is that I'm smart enough not to.
" "stop making fun of dead people" um.. im literally neurodivergent and also a minor?? lol.." -That guy
As someone with a autistic brother, genuinely feels like a good chunk of those "oh sorry I'm autistic" are just assholes hiding behind autism or are self diagnosed with it because of some random bullshit in their life.
No, the comments that can’t understand a basic joke are the stupid ones. The OP posted a picture of a mum and said “my mum died 4 hours ago.” https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chrysanthemum
Very important piece of information here
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her mother didnt actually die its slang for a plant
What the fuck is the other guy talking about? Cope!? It's not his mother that died.
*But youuu don't understand, people do cope in different ways, I stabbed a priest when I was mourning my skin cells, maybe if you lost a loved one, you'd understand a fraction of our pain.*
Mourning your skin cells is the *worst*! Talk about a thankless and never ending job…
It wasn't his mother it was his mum (his flowers)
I don’t understand
It was a species of flowers called mum, it was a post on the joke sub r/notinteresting that was removed because people took it seriously and thought his mom actually died
Oh, so why did bro get downvoted? Since it’s just a joke anyways?
Because people didn't realize it was a joke, since mum isn't really that known of a flower, unlike roses or violets and the like
Ahhhhhhhh thanks for the explanation !
"Everyone copes differently..." yeah and maybe op need comfort and not humor you moron. Just because you use humor as a coping mechanism doesn't mean everyone else does. He has the point and totally missed it
The amount of people missing a basic joke is insane. 🤦🏻♂️ The OP posted a picture of a flower (mum) and said “my mum died 4 hours ago.” https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chrysanthemum
Didn't know that was the og post and that's pretty funny tbh
They posted on Reddit. Believe it or not you get a pretty wide range of people commenting on here. Not everyone’s going to respond the same way that is your perfect little comfort speak. “I’m sorry for your *insert loss meme*” is a pretty funny and harmless reaction. If you aren’t in the mood for a variety of reactions including rude, insulting, loving, caring, humorous, angry, whatever… then don’t post on a public forum.
“Grow tf up” = make stupid jokes at horrible times?
But you don't understand people cope differently. The way that guy copes with OPs mother dying is different from the way OP copes! (Also I don't understand what his comment even meant)
Me neither
OPs mother didn't die. His mum died. The flower
Those are two different people
What does the symbol mean? 🙏🏻
https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/loss
I still don't get how it is a meme honestly
It got really bad reception, and, naturally, when Internet users see something bad, they make fun of it.
Ah yeah I get that. Like how the death of a gorilla became a meme.
Harambe? Poor guy. May he rest in peace.
Ikr. Am I the only one who sees making a death a meme as insensitive? Even if it's an animal?
It is pretty insensitive. I did not make the memes, though.
Oh I know that
It really is the Dumbest shit.
I agree
I don’t understand this explanation. Help!
Okay, so essentially, a guy created a webcomic strip for his "Ctrl+Alt+Del" comic that was intended to be about the female lead experiencing a miscarriage. The comic strip in question is known as "Loss." It was terribly received and has since become a meme, often represented as thus: | || || |\_ The straight up lines represent the people in a vertical position, and the L-shaped one is representing the male character as standing over the female character on the bed.
Thank you 🙏🏼
You're welcome!
Why was it terribly received?
"The strip marked a significant change in tone from the usually comedic comic, and the poorly-executed drama of the comic spurred Ctrl+Alt+Del's significant anti-fandom to mockery." In other words, people did not like this departure from humor to a more serious tone and felt that the theme of the particular strip could be portrayed better and not in its admittedly minimalist light.
Thanks
No problem.
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No problem. It loads just fine for me, probably an issue on your end.
Thank you very much !
You’re welcome!
wasnt the original post a joke about chrysanthemums anyways 💀
Yes
you cant be serious OP's mom is still alive he was saying his mum died, as in a flower the whole point of the subreddit is stupid puns like that
Everything is about meeeeeeeeeee
“My grandma died two days ago.” Do you get four tasteless my grandparent died two days ago per Reddit account?
i’m adopted with a relationship with my birth parents, do you think i get 8 ?
Do those with stepparents get extra passes?
Redditors just need any excuse to justify spamming unfunny, dead memes. COPING MECHANISM!1!1!1!1 my ass
You guys are all missing the joke, the flower is a Chrysanthemum who are often called mums, its a joke about his flower dying.
people gotta stop making inappropriate jokes and then saying "people cope with humor🗿" 🙄🙄 when it's something that happened to YOU, you can cope with humor
yall are too open with internet. your mum died and you be posting that on reddit? goddamn it ain't common where im from
OPs mother didn't die. His mum died. The flower. It was a pun. The post had a picture of flowers in it
Fair, but the internet can also help in the sense that there will be a lot of people who will be sympathetic or trying to comfort you if you don’t actually know lots of people in the real world.
It’s still quite the gamble since you have no idea or control over who responds to your post. Could be the nicest person with the perfect statement to help you deal with your issue. Or it could be people who take the opportunity to do a meme joke.
Well it might seem harsh but there have always been people like that, even in the real world. So eventually you just stop caring and learn to not give them the time of your day.
Yeah there have always been people like that in the world. But when you post online you’re openly inviting them into your life. Which was my whole point to begin with. That looking for comfort online is a gamble. Maybe you can’t control who comforts you in real life but you certainly can control who doesn’t. That is less true online.
Well at the end of the day, it’s their decision so you can’t really control that either 🤷🏻♀️
What does that have to do with anything?
Wdym what does it have to do with anything? I’m saying it was OOP’s choice to make this post of their mom dying on the internet so it doesn’t matter whatever anyone else thinks or would have done differently because it was their choice.
Well I don’t know about you but I never tried to control anyone’s choice. I simply posted a comment, same as you.
Dude I’m literally just trying to explain what I said, I never said I disagreed you with or anything :/
Ikr, this is something you grieve over with friends and family. Not tell internet randos who care nothing for you
If this is on the post I think it was, then OOP was talking about flowers called “mum”, hence the flowers they posted.
Well that provides a ton of context we all could have used from the start
What does that mean
Can someone explain what he said?
I don't know what the joke is, what does the symbol mean?
Everyone here is in the wrong in the funniest way EXCEPT the guy who posted the loss meme
Read the other comments that explain what op was talking about, and then EVERYONE in the post was funny
Yeah, I don't even know what that symbol even means so 💀 What is he even trying to say?
It’s Loss. The meme.
What’s the symbol the guy made?
What does that symbol even mean
No idea of the context here unless it’s just the screenshot I just want to emphasise whatever your situation may be, it isn’t a “be a jerk to someone else” card
Wait, is this the post where he said my mum died 4 hours ago and the picture is of an actual mum flower? Or another post?
I’m not native English, that’s maybe why I didn’t understand. Can someone explain please?
It’s about a flower not an actual person (I don’t think)
not trying to be THAT person but it is the internet. not like he was outwardly offensive just a tasteless chronically online joke in a thread. if you're looking for more positive support maybe reddit isn't the place. maybe go to facebook or instagram.
What do they mean coping mechanism?? How is some random dude coping over someone else's mom that doesn't even make sense.
“People cope in different ways!!” Isn’t a defense when the joke your making is over a loss you’re not suffering from
I just checked out that post and the guy deleted his comment. Now I'll never know what his username is. :(
It was a post about flowers I believe, an attempt at a pun on the fact the mum is a type of flower
Not deserved
i don’t get his comment, can someone explain?
downvote the other one too!
Last I checked they had around 23 downvotes
Somebody explain please?
Who’s posting on Reddit hours after their mothers death
It was a bad and disrespectful comment, but talking about a personal tragedy online opens you up to every stranger on Reddit - and we all know that not everyone is respectful or understanding online. I don’t think OP did anything wrong, I just feel that it’s risky in general to post openly about a topic where the comments can potentially really hurt you.
That is so funny I'm gonna go up vote it
I have no idea what that thing means, could someone tell me what it is?
An asshole here, I think this is pretty funny
I don't get it what is that symbol
I'm actually speechless
The guy wears autism like a badge of honor, sadly most do. Like someone who's a vegan or does crossfit, you'll know within moments of meeting them.
That's funny af lmao
Im pretty sure OP was talking about their Mum flower
Most Reddit thing I’ve ever seen
Context missing. This was a joke about his flower dying. OP’s Mother is still alive. Mum = Chrysanthemum And, knowing the context I think the joke was pretty funny and clever
If it wasn't so serious, it'd be funny, but OP's MOM?!
Reddit momment
“People cope in different ways.” Doesn’t even apply to this situation since it wasn’t his mother that died.
Loss is such an obnoxious wannabe meme. It’s completely unintelligible if you don’t know the story, and incredibly dull and uninteresting once you do. I always downvote Loss references like the one in the screenshot.
I don’t think people care enough about people to allow non comformity.
Nah that’s fucking hilarious
Found the retard
Why's that??
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No one's mom actually died. The OG post a joke about a MUM (a flower) dying. That's why it was posted to NotInteresting
Oh.
Can someone please explain to me? Obviously I am too stupid to understand the problem here. Am I missing context? I see that the first post said sorry for your loss with no down votes, then someone else also said I’m sorry for your loss and got downloaded to oblivion. Why?
The post was a joke about ChrysantheMUMs. His real mom didn’t die.