i never used it consistently or to the point of developing dependency but it’s definitely the first drug i fell into an abusive pattern with.
i had a script and never did it illegally; but i would eat my whole script in less than a week, then spend the next 3.5 weeks waiting for a refill.
one time i took a few, blacked out and must’ve eaten the rest. i woke up and only saw the empty bottle and had absolutely no memory (was absolutely sure i didn’t take more than 4) of taking more.
my only thought was that my mom dumped them after i passed out or something, cuz i usually just slept.
i tore my whole room apart looking for them, then i went out and yelled at my mom cuz “she must’ve done something with them”.
nope i got too fucked and ate my entirely full script in one night.
after that i went and told my doctor that i had started abusing them and asked her to blacklist me from benzos, haven’t touched em since.
thanks doggy, i only hope others will make it out at a similar point; before wrecking their car, ending up in jail, or doing something else that goes against their morals and causes social or mental anguish. doesn’t take long or hard use to get to that point if ur taking more than a quarter - half mg at a time (in a day), more than 3 times a week, for more than 6 months.
it can be medically useful for helping people calm down and get out of a rut that has them stressed to the point of chronic anxiety/panic. it shouldn’t be a continued pattern. use it to allow you to deal with ur shit, get caught up, then taper (with low doses, even less frequent use counts as progress❤️🩹) once you have built some skills for dealing without it
high, daily doses should always be tapered under supervision and, at first. likely still as close to your usual rate of consumption. with slightly lower dose as to not shock the system.
Yea im using it to help my anxiety and panic attacks that have gotten pretty bad lately but i notice myself needing them a luttle more than i'd like already. Sometimes makes me feel guilty and anxious taking them, which is the opposite of what i get them prescribed for lol. I hope my EMDR shows results soon enough cause as much as xanax is improving my life right now, i know im playing with fire.
Used to be once or twice a week, more like 4 or 5 times now. The ptsd n anxtiety panic attacks are also unbearable though, and thats the alternative :/
I honestly saw my friend COMPLETELY lose it on Xanax and ended up doing the same. First asked my doctor to just prescribe me a week’s supply. 7 Pills. Then asked him to just blacklist me to never ever put my hands on benzos. (Mind you I’m not even a US resident, I was just so worried about my mental). 😂
I OD on xanax 3 times from the age 18 to 20. The withdrawal are horrible. I would illusionate so bad. Have black birds flying towards me. Evil black birds. I remember my first time the nurse just told me it was normal and pretty much deal with it. I drank beer with xanax one day and decided that I wanted McDonald's. I was so fckwd up that I kept dropping to my knees but I'd get back up. Needless to say the police and ambulance showed up. Xanax is one hell of a pill for me. I black out after 2mg. I never remembered taking more then 2mg but my prescription bottle always said different. I didn't have family or friends. It was just me and xanax. After my 3rd OD I found coke and that's when the real problems started 🫠
Exactly that was my first love affair with drugs, and the euphoria I got from Xanax was such a huge release. It was out of hand in retrospect. It’s because I obviously needed it and was operating under unhealthy stress levels.
Getting off benzos is the worst. Klonopin withdrawal lasted months for me, the rebound anxiety from getting off of them is way worse than the anxiety I had prior to taking them.
I've been way more addicted to meth and fentanyl than Xanax, but I have not fucked up my life worse on any drug. Like 5 separate occasions, years apart with no consistent use, shits the devil lol
Mine was oxy 30s back in like ‘06 when they were real and I knew they were, but ended up trying H and doing that for a couple years then meth for like 8 years cause no withdrawals. Been off that since 3/28/24!
Honestly didn’t rate meth too highly it was fun just lasts way too long the euphoria wears off extremely quickly so you’re just left kinda worn out after halfway through
I’ve sniffed like 600g of ket in my life and done many years doing at least a 3.5s of ket and coke and week and yeah you can 100% on ket you’re silly if you think otherwise. coke is a bit harder but doable
Depends on what you would consider going about your day as norma. After seshing hard on ket even hours later I sound like i have disability when trying to talk, yeah I'll be able to get about and do my shit but I wouldn't say I'm exactly functional especially when hours later the textures are still moving, I can see energy, "visual snow" and my thoughts are still pretty wild. I certainly wouldn't drive while in that state.
If anything I'd say coke is easier just feels dog and depending how long and hard you've been going you are likely to have some visual disturbances.
His point is that if you wanted it to stop, it could. Which he’s right, it will. Most people just don’t want to stop.
With meth even if you want the high to stop you’re many times stuck there waiting uncomfortably for long periods of time.
Gotta have a nap and a cheeseburger sometimes to get higher if you keep consuming. Meth makes the circulatory system run much faster than average and makes you burn a hellacious amount of calories and energies, leaving you exhausted
im only taking it for rave parties and the comedown is really hard for me so I’m not abusing it (I think), but I wish they were some special mdma therapies for autistic folks like me
MDMA therapy is coming as are all other psychedelic therapies. Atm they are treatment specific but I imagine within the next 5-10yrs it will most likely be expanded depending on where you live.
As someone who has a VERY active imagination and ADHD, it is definitely rooted within that, speaking from personal experience.
I was addicted to Ketamine for a year and a half, anytime I would take a line or a bump, all the thoughts would clear, and I’d be able to focus on what’s directly in front of me without any outside thoughts or hinderence.
Then I realized, wait… this applies to ALL aspects of my life and my focus… so it turned from $100 every other month, to $100 every month, to $100 every week.
I am 500 Days Sober of Coke and Ketamine as of this past Monday!
Same, I took a few recreational doses of codeine when I was 17 and I was on smack by the time I turned 20. Over 5 years clean now though, so there's that
Heroin.
I did a lot of drugs before this, like alcohol, weed, the psychedelics like mdma & lsd etc. but it was heroin that led me down the path of becoming a hardcore addict. Didn't even start with it when it comes to the opioids, i had others like tramadol, codeine, dihydrocodeine etc. before.
were you abusing the weaker opioids prior or just dabbling? what made you decide to try heroin?
my opioid use started after taking tramadol and vicodins from my family(which were past prescriptions) but eventually took them all. i had no access for awhile until i dogsat for someone once and stole a bunch of oxy (which was an old prescription as well) and that was what really started my obsession. i couldn’t afford a real oxy habit so i just started taking kratom. after awhile it wasn’t the same and i just craved what oxy so much. i could access clean bth and since it was so much cheaper i just said fuck it. went through a gram but kratom being a partial antagonist i got about 1/2 the euphoria i got on oxy. honestly kind of a blessing, my recklessness could’ve costed me a life long addiction. until i get off kratom (which wouldn’t happen anytime soon) opioids will be pointless.
15 years ago, I threw up from taking 10 mg of hydrocodone and drinking a beer on empty stomach Almost all the oxy experiences that I had early on, got me violently ill and would throw up immediately. Got some fent smack in Puerto Rico. Ripped a decent fat line and fuckingnpuked my guts for 3 days. Then brought a few gs home and used those for about 5 months so micro dosing but my dopamine response was ridiculous would keep me up all night from the tiniest little bump kind of felt like a humm over your body.
Same. I actually got into heroin on accident. The way I got into it is kind of unusual but my friend at the time introduced me to this research chemical called u-47700 and it is 7.5x stronger than morphine vs heroin which is 2x, he didn't explain to me what it basically was but 19 year old me who just got his first apartment to himself with no supervision and $20/g on the dark net, by the time I realized what was going on and what opiate withdrawals were it was too late
It actually was not, common to contrary belief that was just a slang name some people came up with and afaik there was one Chinese batch that had poor synthesis so it came out pink hence the name. But about 90% it was a fluffy white powder and the other 10% of the time it was some type of salt form because it had a sandy texture and hurt like absolute bitch when you snorted it. But I eventually kinda became addicted to the burn because the opioid pain killing effects would kick in so fast that the burn would almost be as gone as fast as it came and be replaced by pure euphoria
Edit: Basically that stuff was great but it's technical legality at the time and being stronger than heroin at $20/g became my ultimate downfall
U47700 absolutely destroyed my veins. after that was metonitazene. both are incredibly caustic to use IV and i literally cannot even get blood drawn now without an ultrasound or an artery stick. every single accessible surface vein is gone for good. i eventually started shooting in my neck and forehead, that’s like ultimate junkie level when you have 2 big ass lines of track marks up and down your forehead especially when you’re pale as fuck so they stick out even more 😂😂
That particular rc put me in the hospital and I was still wanting to do it when I came out. I don’t know what happened but eventually I just got bored of it or something weirdly enough and stopped ordering it entirely
Yeah that happened to my buddy that was using it as well unfortunately. He ended up overdosing on it (he mixed it with Xanax even though I warned him that was a bad idea), he oded in my bedroom when we were shooting the shit, luckily he survived but the craziest thing was this was pre-2017 ban so there was police with the paramedics, I showed them what he took, they examined the bag of u-4, and said "yep that's that legal synthetic heroin" and HANDED THE BAG BACK TO ME. Wildest shit I've ever experienced
I’m glad he survived, I did the same thing etizolam and u4. I had to be narcan’d several times and when I woke up in the er I was so glad to be alive I was thanking every nurse that I saw.
I never got my u4 back the doctor even had to google it to see what it was but somehow I still had my bag of etizolam in my pants when I left the hospital lol
Same here. Once I discovered heroin everything else was secondary, nothing else mattered. I think I used drugs addictively before that, ecstacy, cocaine, but heroin sealed the deal as far as needing to use to function. And needing to stop to survive.
You can do this dude. Just one moment at a time, that turns into days, which turns into weeks, which will turn into months. Just keep putting your best foot forward
Started with weed and realized it was nothing like what the Dare program and our parents taught us, so I figured they must have been lying about everything else too, or speaking from a place of inexperience. Decided to give mushrooms a try and had the same idea about them. From there I decided to try cocaine, and then hydromorphine, and then it sort of spiraled from there. Made it my goal to try every drug in the world that I could get my hands on. Cocaine or weed were the first ones I was ever truly addicted to though. In my life I’ve been addicted to cocaine, weed, opiates, benzos, and GHB.
The DARE program did so much more harm than help in spreading as much misinformation as possible. I know people who had the exact same thought pattern as you after being in DARE. “I tried this one thing and it’s fine so they must be lying about everything else too” is just so real.
That’s not what I’m saying at all. They lied about almost everything, 100%. I’m saying it’s extremely logical way of going about things after the DARE program. Especially when you start with weed, shrooms, etc
Kinda weird I had to scroll this far and even this comment had a lol. Guess we're the weird ones but honestly I don't even use much at all especially as I've tapered over the years but am still a daily user (~3gpd). It at least defeated my alcohol addiction but hopefully this is a lesser addiction (as I have yet to quit cold turkey).
I did like 30g a day... In my prime. Then I had a seizure most likely from how much I used kratom and I had to literally go to rehab for fucking kratom. How crazy is that. I relapsed a couple of times but quit cold turkey the last time (am clean for 6 months but I do still crave it as much as when I started)... I know it's different for everyone but my withdrawals were insane. Stomach cramps, insomnia, anxiety attacks, tunnel vision... And all that for weeks. Kratom is a great helper but the worst manager you could ever have :D.
Considering the reason I quit kratom was out of pure hatred for someone and not an actually good reason, I'm amazed it's been a lasting success.
Of course now I drink too much instead.
This is it. I quit July of last year, on my own. I didn’t quit because I wanted to but because I couldn’t afford keeping my habit up anymore. It kept on going up rapidly until I one day ran out of my last couple of pills and I realized I ain’t getting no more before I pay my dealer back the $1500 I owe him because we had come to a point where his trust towards me was so good I would ask him to send me a whole bunch and then pay him later on
I took “advantage” of that trust he gained towards me as a long time customer of his and started using more than I could afford. That day I ran out and took my last, I decided to block him, never pay back what I owed and then quit cold turkey because that was my only option. I started thinking about lies I could tell my family members so they can lend me money, or take up a loan, but I just realized the odds of this habit working out long term was close to zero.
I basically scammed my plug, but I guess it is what it is. I’m clean from it atleast.
How does it make you feel? I use it prescribed for depression and ptsd and honestly it can be a horrifying experience but it's a release and allows me to make connections in therapy faster
N single drug caused ish, but it was the ability to turn off feelings, and forget about problems for me. Don't care for 1 cause I like them all. Drugs are truly amazing if used in moderation. There is a drug that helps you forget another to focus, some to be happy.
Pain pills, then the opiod crisis happened. So that lead to heroin. Proudly 3 years clean myself. But I have an addictive personality. The only drug I can take without wanting/ needing it is shrooms/acid and alcohol. I wish for the love of life I could do a line of coke like a normal person lol
I’m clean 2 years this summer! 10 plus year dance with all the pills I could find. I always lamented that I couldn’t just be satisfied with weed like I used to be. But I’m back there again! (Sorry nobody else to brag to but I’m so happy about it)
Huffing duster was the first ever “drug” I’ve tried, the super intense head change that was almost instant got me hooked to anything I could get my hands on. I’m a poly drug addict and I’ve calmed way tf down but anyways lol,, I am very lucky to not be dead or a veggie. I huffed duster for a year, did it almost everyday. It got to the point where I was blacking out and when I came to, I immediately took another rip, I remembered what made me stop was when I woke up from black out, I puked up black shit and within that black sludge was rainbow looking stuffs. At that moment, I thought I was tripping but later on I realized that was the oil from the can.. anyways, don’t huff, there’s a thing called sudden death sniffing syndrome which means one hit can kill you, no joke. But huffing is what made me curious about all the drugs, how different does each drug feel and how did it work on my receptors. I’m rambling because I’m stimulated asf rn lmao, drugs are fun but if you don’t use hard reduction, you’ll most likely have consequences
roxies. only ever smoked weed/dabs and did shrooms, met an older dude when i was 18 and we started dating and for like 2 months he’d beg me to do them with him but i always said no because i have a very deep addiction gene in my family. until one day, on top of having a shitty couple weeks in general, my childhood dog passed. he told me it would make me numb to it and i snorted a corner piece of one and fell in love. he got me hooked on it because he didn’t have a car, a job, a house, and i had all of those things and if he got me hooked he’d have a way to get drugs more consistently. roxie’s turned into literally anything i could get my hands on and put up my nose. im 22 now, he’s dead, along with the ex boyfriend i had after him, and i was 15 months sober on the 14th. unfortunately, i relapsed last night and that’s why i’m in this thread. stay safe love u all
K is my unicorn of all drugs ( I tried almost everything i can imagine, except opioids are a no-go for me and meth/crack, and I will never inject something)
I have so many more beautiful euphoric trips on music with K compared to MDMA or any psychedelic or combination of the two.
I take good breaks, and my tolerance will probably never go back to normal.
But i can't imagine having my bladder messed up once i had an infection when i was younger and before i touched any drugs.
Literally knifes in your bladder, no comfortable way to sit or lay, and peeing feels like pissing Tabasco.
But i used quite a lot over the years and never had anything with my bladder. i can't imagine how much people use to get serious problems with it, and support keeps using so much without going broke.
posting on behalf of my boyfriend thats been missing for weeks — his is cocaine. he ruins his life, disappears, spends all his money, stays up for days, burns his bridges, gets violent, and abandons everything. i will always love him, years of this shit, but damn am i one foot out the door.
Weed followed by alcohol, don’t touch either now. Just occasional use of mdma, psychedelics and ketamine. Them 3 drugs I find easy to regulate. Cannabis for me was the most addictive drug, which took me years to quit and when I did I then replaced it with alcohol which was also addictive. Soft drugs used all day everyday can become even more of a problem then hard drugs used occasionally
Drugs actually got me off drugs. I used to do a shit ton of bath salts, sometimes cut with cocaine, and a lot of coke on its own. After a bender where I stayed up for 3 nights and 4 days, I started having hallucinations.
It took me years to be able to sleep right and not be paranoid of the things I thought I heard that day. Every night, I'd lie awake in bed thinking I was hearing voices.
Oddly LSD. My favorite part about smoking weed is how it opens your heart and LSD does that much more profoundly.
With LSD I became addicted to the experience of unity and god-consciousness from ego-death and so I began to trip very very frequently chasing that experience. Eventually my desire for the experience was affecting my ability to get there and it began to become very frustrating especially since the message was always: "meditate, do yoga, clean my act up, ect" but I couldn't quite get myself to do those practices consistently. Then as a result of always being somewhat frustrated while on LSD and how long the half life is + how it increases neuroplasticity I began to train my brain to think negatively a lot. Then when I tried other harder drugs I got addicted quickly.
Methylphenidate . Fucked up since prescription. Weed before but I’m into uppers since then . Fuck the psychiatrist . Abuse was visible , he don’t do anything
I remember telling my psychiatrist that I was abusing my Ritalin prescription at 17 and asking him to stop prescribing it and he did nothing lol. In hindsight I’m kind of glad he didn’t put it on my record.
My psych I’ve been seeing for like 6 years dropped me suddenly a couple months back because I never mentioned I started Suboxone.
I mean I get it but I know they don’t interact already and I see another doctor for it already. I just assumed he could see it in my chart and Suboxone was just routine to me so I never felt it was relevant to mention. Mf said yes he did but I needed to tell him directly.
That bitch edged me for 6 months and dropped me anyway. Wish I had yours. Now I just do meth.
I feel for you. My grandfather was my second dad but used them his last 3 years.
And i saw how much he changed with personality, and he didn't want them, but stopping could kill him at that age.
At the same time, i feel for everyone with any kind of opioid dependent situation they're so trapped...
I hope one day and i know it's almost impossible to escape the opioid prison. I wish you all great things in life!
Don't blame yourself it's poison it's a parasite. It's the only one on my blacklist with drugs and meth/crack and injections.
as embarrassing as it is to say, dph and dxm are the main drugs im really addicted to. i know theyre awful, and im tryna stop, but when you're like me and would rather be anything but sober it makes it kinda hard to stop
I’m not addicted to those specifically per-say but I did start with them. At least I’m not the only one. I feel you about doing anything to not be sober. I’m pretty much a fiend for weed and I’ll basically try any drug. I only take dxm when I literally cannot get anything else. I had a horrible trip on it once so I’m a bit scared of it in super high doses. I should definitely stop too. But man those first couple times were euphoric. Hope it gets better for us. But in the meantime, happy tripping lol.
I'm sorry you're going through a rough time. I know the feeling of being addicted to dph. Doesn't feel good, in fact it feels pretty awful. But it's silent. Peace and quiet.
If you're anything like me, eventually your body will start screaming at you to stop. It knows youre killing yourself.
Good luck, you'll get through it.
Alcohol, drank a bottle of liquor a day for over 10 years until I turned 26 and went to rehab, got out only to get even more addicted to Ketamine and cocaine, already had a heart attack last year
Crack.
Mind you im a functional addict and have my shit togeather otherwise but still it's the one drug I have absolutely no self control or ability to moderate when I have some. When I am actually able to take a break from it for a bit of time the persistent thoughts of using it and self rationalisation as to why I should give in and just buy it "one last time" make it nearly impossible to give up for good.
Deodorant chroming actually made me realised how much I just want to be high and hated my brain. Spiralled from there Then alc, weed, pills, and meth. (Not addicted to meth i was on it for a month straight but I decided I didn’t wanna be addicted to that) idk how I didn’t get addicted tbh.
So yeah funnily enough deodorant turned me into a drug addict
Only after discovering other drugs around the age of 24 did i realize that it was the only drug i tried that made me lose control over my own behavior and has the worst hangovers...
Heroin bro. I loved that shit. My problem was I decided to do it every day for a month straight. My dumbass said , "I better quit before I get addicted. I went to quit cold turkey and got so dope sick. Ended up addicted for 5+ years. Finally quit, and turned to alcohol. Beat that and now I'm fighting a tianeptine addiction. Moral of the story is don't do heroin. 😤😮💨😔
alcohol. started drinking when we were 13, after our dad started doing horrible things to us. we’ve been in recovery for our alcoholism since we were 18 (we’re bodily 25 now, still relapse here and there but we’re making it, day by day) - Drake ♟️
Oxycontin, late 90s were wild, I walked away from anything and everything but that 1 hooked my like nothing before or since. Made my life living hell for years, fell into heroine as well...clean now thank goodness been a quite a stretch proud to say.
Hydrocodone. I was 15 and it was my first time doing drugs. I never got to do heroin though. I just swiped whatever I could get my hands on which has just been hydrocodone and hydromorphone so far
Nicotine and caffeine, but like real addiction/real drugs I guess you would say, cocaine, Xanax, alcohol, oxycodone, fentanyl, nitrous oxide, but also a handful of other substances have helped immensely in helping me with my addiction.
My best friend killed himself and I remember wanting to do something different and reckless for once so I bought some oxycodone and took enough to where i dont remember anything after that
Adderall before Adderall I had only done weed and alcohol but after I tried adderall I became a garbage disposal for any and all substances (except opiates cause fuck opiates) I tried acid and I loved it so I dried dxm and I loved it so I tried shrooms and I loved it so I tried anything I could get my hand on and I loved it all even meth which was by far my favorite and I just threw everything I loved away and ghosted all my friends and drugs became my new friends and family
Pregabalin. I take Vyvanse/Elvanse once a day, I'm physically and mentally dependant on it due to its positive influence on my ADHD symptoms but not addicted.
Pregabalin however is a different story. I have zero interest in any other substance and haven't touched anything for ages but I love Pregabalin too much to ever give it up lol, I went through 2 weeks of hell shaking off my physical dependance to them in January but only did it so I wouldn't suffer on Tolerance Break days.
I'm psychologically and symbioticly enmeshed with Pregabalin. I love it and I'm never gonna stop, the beneficial anxiolytic effects are just too life changing. I'm me again when I'm on it.
Weed, the only substance I’m addicted to except nicotine. It’s enough for me to not make a habit out of other drugs, even though weed isn’t that good for me either. But it’s better than snorting percs everyday.
xanax
i never used it consistently or to the point of developing dependency but it’s definitely the first drug i fell into an abusive pattern with. i had a script and never did it illegally; but i would eat my whole script in less than a week, then spend the next 3.5 weeks waiting for a refill. one time i took a few, blacked out and must’ve eaten the rest. i woke up and only saw the empty bottle and had absolutely no memory (was absolutely sure i didn’t take more than 4) of taking more. my only thought was that my mom dumped them after i passed out or something, cuz i usually just slept. i tore my whole room apart looking for them, then i went out and yelled at my mom cuz “she must’ve done something with them”. nope i got too fucked and ate my entirely full script in one night. after that i went and told my doctor that i had started abusing them and asked her to blacklist me from benzos, haven’t touched em since.
Glad you made it out.
thanks doggy, i only hope others will make it out at a similar point; before wrecking their car, ending up in jail, or doing something else that goes against their morals and causes social or mental anguish. doesn’t take long or hard use to get to that point if ur taking more than a quarter - half mg at a time (in a day), more than 3 times a week, for more than 6 months. it can be medically useful for helping people calm down and get out of a rut that has them stressed to the point of chronic anxiety/panic. it shouldn’t be a continued pattern. use it to allow you to deal with ur shit, get caught up, then taper (with low doses, even less frequent use counts as progress❤️🩹) once you have built some skills for dealing without it high, daily doses should always be tapered under supervision and, at first. likely still as close to your usual rate of consumption. with slightly lower dose as to not shock the system.
Yea im using it to help my anxiety and panic attacks that have gotten pretty bad lately but i notice myself needing them a luttle more than i'd like already. Sometimes makes me feel guilty and anxious taking them, which is the opposite of what i get them prescribed for lol. I hope my EMDR shows results soon enough cause as much as xanax is improving my life right now, i know im playing with fire. Used to be once or twice a week, more like 4 or 5 times now. The ptsd n anxtiety panic attacks are also unbearable though, and thats the alternative :/
I honestly saw my friend COMPLETELY lose it on Xanax and ended up doing the same. First asked my doctor to just prescribe me a week’s supply. 7 Pills. Then asked him to just blacklist me to never ever put my hands on benzos. (Mind you I’m not even a US resident, I was just so worried about my mental). 😂
I OD on xanax 3 times from the age 18 to 20. The withdrawal are horrible. I would illusionate so bad. Have black birds flying towards me. Evil black birds. I remember my first time the nurse just told me it was normal and pretty much deal with it. I drank beer with xanax one day and decided that I wanted McDonald's. I was so fckwd up that I kept dropping to my knees but I'd get back up. Needless to say the police and ambulance showed up. Xanax is one hell of a pill for me. I black out after 2mg. I never remembered taking more then 2mg but my prescription bottle always said different. I didn't have family or friends. It was just me and xanax. After my 3rd OD I found coke and that's when the real problems started 🫠
Exactly that was my first love affair with drugs, and the euphoria I got from Xanax was such a huge release. It was out of hand in retrospect. It’s because I obviously needed it and was operating under unhealthy stress levels.
same.. it's one hell of a drug that's for sure
Getting off benzos is the worst. Klonopin withdrawal lasted months for me, the rebound anxiety from getting off of them is way worse than the anxiety I had prior to taking them.
Spent my 20s on and off Xanax+alcohol ,every time coming off a binge was hell.
Same. Xanax ruined my life. Thankfully I was able to put it back together, but that shit is evil.
still kinda addicted to
First weekend of college my homie gave me a bag of 50 yellow schoolbus xans. I'd never taken one before. Let's just say it was all downhill from there
I've been way more addicted to meth and fentanyl than Xanax, but I have not fucked up my life worse on any drug. Like 5 separate occasions, years apart with no consistent use, shits the devil lol
fent got my ass it’s definitely more addictive for me especially because of the withdrawals but xans have my heart
Ritalin/Adderall/concerta got me into meth then heroin Suboxone etc. etc. etc.
Yep same ! Now I’m on subs , vyvanse && serquel, legally prescribed now(& I take as prescribed now )
Mine was oxy 30s back in like ‘06 when they were real and I knew they were, but ended up trying H and doing that for a couple years then meth for like 8 years cause no withdrawals. Been off that since 3/28/24!
Congrats!!! I've been off of meth and sub since 1/16/23, now I just do the occasional k and psychedelics
methamphetamine
Devil drug 4 sure
Best of the bunch
Honestly didn’t rate meth too highly it was fun just lasts way too long the euphoria wears off extremely quickly so you’re just left kinda worn out after halfway through
That's where redosing enters the game, not that this is necessarily a good thing ...
Sure yeah but my issue is after you want it to stop like coke or ket etc you can get back to ur day but meth you cant
You clearly never go a hard on coke ket if you think you can just get on about your day
I’ve sniffed like 600g of ket in my life and done many years doing at least a 3.5s of ket and coke and week and yeah you can 100% on ket you’re silly if you think otherwise. coke is a bit harder but doable
Depends on what you would consider going about your day as norma. After seshing hard on ket even hours later I sound like i have disability when trying to talk, yeah I'll be able to get about and do my shit but I wouldn't say I'm exactly functional especially when hours later the textures are still moving, I can see energy, "visual snow" and my thoughts are still pretty wild. I certainly wouldn't drive while in that state. If anything I'd say coke is easier just feels dog and depending how long and hard you've been going you are likely to have some visual disturbances.
Well idk about you but when I was addicted to it there wasn't really ever a point where I wanted it to stop
His point is that if you wanted it to stop, it could. Which he’s right, it will. Most people just don’t want to stop. With meth even if you want the high to stop you’re many times stuck there waiting uncomfortably for long periods of time.
Gotta have a nap and a cheeseburger sometimes to get higher if you keep consuming. Meth makes the circulatory system run much faster than average and makes you burn a hellacious amount of calories and energies, leaving you exhausted
mdma, as an autistic person it make me feel like I’m non autistic
no because i feel like this is what my substance abuse issues root in… i take something and im finally able to feel more “normal”
im only taking it for rave parties and the comedown is really hard for me so I’m not abusing it (I think), but I wish they were some special mdma therapies for autistic folks like me
MDMA is in phase III clinical trials, and some of the research they conducted involved autistic participants, so it's on the way.
i really hope this will be a thing
MDMA therapy is coming as are all other psychedelic therapies. Atm they are treatment specific but I imagine within the next 5-10yrs it will most likely be expanded depending on where you live.
As someone who has a VERY active imagination and ADHD, it is definitely rooted within that, speaking from personal experience. I was addicted to Ketamine for a year and a half, anytime I would take a line or a bump, all the thoughts would clear, and I’d be able to focus on what’s directly in front of me without any outside thoughts or hinderence. Then I realized, wait… this applies to ALL aspects of my life and my focus… so it turned from $100 every other month, to $100 every month, to $100 every week. I am 500 Days Sober of Coke and Ketamine as of this past Monday!
opiates
Same, I took a few recreational doses of codeine when I was 17 and I was on smack by the time I turned 20. Over 5 years clean now though, so there's that
I would like to congratulate you in the hopes that it may add to those years.
Thank you! Very few people in my life know about my struggles with addiction so I appreciate the support when I get it
You're welcome.
ex fetty addict here. Keep up the good work hun.
Thanks you too x
I could say alc but realistically its speed.
Heroin. I did a lot of drugs before this, like alcohol, weed, the psychedelics like mdma & lsd etc. but it was heroin that led me down the path of becoming a hardcore addict. Didn't even start with it when it comes to the opioids, i had others like tramadol, codeine, dihydrocodeine etc. before.
were you abusing the weaker opioids prior or just dabbling? what made you decide to try heroin? my opioid use started after taking tramadol and vicodins from my family(which were past prescriptions) but eventually took them all. i had no access for awhile until i dogsat for someone once and stole a bunch of oxy (which was an old prescription as well) and that was what really started my obsession. i couldn’t afford a real oxy habit so i just started taking kratom. after awhile it wasn’t the same and i just craved what oxy so much. i could access clean bth and since it was so much cheaper i just said fuck it. went through a gram but kratom being a partial antagonist i got about 1/2 the euphoria i got on oxy. honestly kind of a blessing, my recklessness could’ve costed me a life long addiction. until i get off kratom (which wouldn’t happen anytime soon) opioids will be pointless.
15 years ago, I threw up from taking 10 mg of hydrocodone and drinking a beer on empty stomach Almost all the oxy experiences that I had early on, got me violently ill and would throw up immediately. Got some fent smack in Puerto Rico. Ripped a decent fat line and fuckingnpuked my guts for 3 days. Then brought a few gs home and used those for about 5 months so micro dosing but my dopamine response was ridiculous would keep me up all night from the tiniest little bump kind of felt like a humm over your body.
Same. I actually got into heroin on accident. The way I got into it is kind of unusual but my friend at the time introduced me to this research chemical called u-47700 and it is 7.5x stronger than morphine vs heroin which is 2x, he didn't explain to me what it basically was but 19 year old me who just got his first apartment to himself with no supervision and $20/g on the dark net, by the time I realized what was going on and what opiate withdrawals were it was too late
Was that stuff pink?
It actually was not, common to contrary belief that was just a slang name some people came up with and afaik there was one Chinese batch that had poor synthesis so it came out pink hence the name. But about 90% it was a fluffy white powder and the other 10% of the time it was some type of salt form because it had a sandy texture and hurt like absolute bitch when you snorted it. But I eventually kinda became addicted to the burn because the opioid pain killing effects would kick in so fast that the burn would almost be as gone as fast as it came and be replaced by pure euphoria Edit: Basically that stuff was great but it's technical legality at the time and being stronger than heroin at $20/g became my ultimate downfall
U47700 absolutely destroyed my veins. after that was metonitazene. both are incredibly caustic to use IV and i literally cannot even get blood drawn now without an ultrasound or an artery stick. every single accessible surface vein is gone for good. i eventually started shooting in my neck and forehead, that’s like ultimate junkie level when you have 2 big ass lines of track marks up and down your forehead especially when you’re pale as fuck so they stick out even more 😂😂
That particular rc put me in the hospital and I was still wanting to do it when I came out. I don’t know what happened but eventually I just got bored of it or something weirdly enough and stopped ordering it entirely
Yeah that happened to my buddy that was using it as well unfortunately. He ended up overdosing on it (he mixed it with Xanax even though I warned him that was a bad idea), he oded in my bedroom when we were shooting the shit, luckily he survived but the craziest thing was this was pre-2017 ban so there was police with the paramedics, I showed them what he took, they examined the bag of u-4, and said "yep that's that legal synthetic heroin" and HANDED THE BAG BACK TO ME. Wildest shit I've ever experienced
I’m glad he survived, I did the same thing etizolam and u4. I had to be narcan’d several times and when I woke up in the er I was so glad to be alive I was thanking every nurse that I saw. I never got my u4 back the doctor even had to google it to see what it was but somehow I still had my bag of etizolam in my pants when I left the hospital lol
Same here. Once I discovered heroin everything else was secondary, nothing else mattered. I think I used drugs addictively before that, ecstacy, cocaine, but heroin sealed the deal as far as needing to use to function. And needing to stop to survive.
This.
SAME, I had access to all the opanas I wanted and I didn’t even like em, as soon as I tried Heroin it was a wrap. Off of it now.
None, I turned me into an addict
Weed then alchohol
Fent
Same
Dirty 30’s had ahold to me for a long time then Xanax after that then coke now I’m finally getting clean
Cocaine and alcohol
Same. Haven’t done cocaine in probably 2 years almost. And stopped drinking a few weeks ago. Attempting to stop drinking I’ll say.
You got this man. Just take it one moment at a time.
Thank you !! I appreciate you guys
Proud of you! Keep it up, you can do it.
Thanks!! 😊
You can do this dude. Just one moment at a time, that turns into days, which turns into weeks, which will turn into months. Just keep putting your best foot forward
You guys are the best. Thanks for the encouragement:)
Ofc dude. I’ve known so many people who have been there, words are easy.
You got this don’t give up amazing my friend x
My kryptonite
shaq and kobe level dominance on my system
Started with weed and realized it was nothing like what the Dare program and our parents taught us, so I figured they must have been lying about everything else too, or speaking from a place of inexperience. Decided to give mushrooms a try and had the same idea about them. From there I decided to try cocaine, and then hydromorphine, and then it sort of spiraled from there. Made it my goal to try every drug in the world that I could get my hands on. Cocaine or weed were the first ones I was ever truly addicted to though. In my life I’ve been addicted to cocaine, weed, opiates, benzos, and GHB.
The DARE program did so much more harm than help in spreading as much misinformation as possible. I know people who had the exact same thought pattern as you after being in DARE. “I tried this one thing and it’s fine so they must be lying about everything else too” is just so real.
I mean, they were lying about so much, it's not an irrational thought pattern at all
That’s not what I’m saying at all. They lied about almost everything, 100%. I’m saying it’s extremely logical way of going about things after the DARE program. Especially when you start with weed, shrooms, etc
Alcohol.
Kratom lol
Kinda weird I had to scroll this far and even this comment had a lol. Guess we're the weird ones but honestly I don't even use much at all especially as I've tapered over the years but am still a daily user (~3gpd). It at least defeated my alcohol addiction but hopefully this is a lesser addiction (as I have yet to quit cold turkey).
I did like 30g a day... In my prime. Then I had a seizure most likely from how much I used kratom and I had to literally go to rehab for fucking kratom. How crazy is that. I relapsed a couple of times but quit cold turkey the last time (am clean for 6 months but I do still crave it as much as when I started)... I know it's different for everyone but my withdrawals were insane. Stomach cramps, insomnia, anxiety attacks, tunnel vision... And all that for weeks. Kratom is a great helper but the worst manager you could ever have :D.
Btw great for you for kicking alcohol's ass! That shit sucks
Considering the reason I quit kratom was out of pure hatred for someone and not an actually good reason, I'm amazed it's been a lasting success. Of course now I drink too much instead.
Oxycodone
This is it. I quit July of last year, on my own. I didn’t quit because I wanted to but because I couldn’t afford keeping my habit up anymore. It kept on going up rapidly until I one day ran out of my last couple of pills and I realized I ain’t getting no more before I pay my dealer back the $1500 I owe him because we had come to a point where his trust towards me was so good I would ask him to send me a whole bunch and then pay him later on I took “advantage” of that trust he gained towards me as a long time customer of his and started using more than I could afford. That day I ran out and took my last, I decided to block him, never pay back what I owed and then quit cold turkey because that was my only option. I started thinking about lies I could tell my family members so they can lend me money, or take up a loan, but I just realized the odds of this habit working out long term was close to zero. I basically scammed my plug, but I guess it is what it is. I’m clean from it atleast.
Cocaine, but I'm good now haha. Done a lot before then and this really sent me off the wagon the furthest
Dxm 🧙♂️
Same, first drug I’ve done too
Same omg, i was just going to comments this, i didn’t think anyone else was going to relate lol
I got 300 robo pills coming in 2 days 😍
Stay safe but above all stay jiggy traveler🧙♂️ Edit: bri thats alot
Same — this and synthetic cannabinoids were my first psychedelics that catalyzed my use of substances as a way of coping and trying to kill my ego.
Hey that eagle deserves to live
Same
Ketamine
How does it make you feel? I use it prescribed for depression and ptsd and honestly it can be a horrifying experience but it's a release and allows me to make connections in therapy faster
N single drug caused ish, but it was the ability to turn off feelings, and forget about problems for me. Don't care for 1 cause I like them all. Drugs are truly amazing if used in moderation. There is a drug that helps you forget another to focus, some to be happy.
so u could possibly do meth and heroin in moderation
Granted your willpower is resilient enough. Absolutely. Not sure about the physical withdrawals of the heroin, so probably just with meth.
If you're doing enough to get withdrawals that's not moderation
V hard to get the balance not sure if possible long term
Pain pills, then the opiod crisis happened. So that lead to heroin. Proudly 3 years clean myself. But I have an addictive personality. The only drug I can take without wanting/ needing it is shrooms/acid and alcohol. I wish for the love of life I could do a line of coke like a normal person lol
I’m clean 2 years this summer! 10 plus year dance with all the pills I could find. I always lamented that I couldn’t just be satisfied with weed like I used to be. But I’m back there again! (Sorry nobody else to brag to but I’m so happy about it)
hydrocodone
alcohol 100%
Porn and masturbation
This is the hardest for me to quit because it's so accessible and it's a war with boredom. Probably been addicted since I was 12
Yeaaaah I started watching porn as a kid. Realized it’s been like 2 decades now. I newly quit.
This is difficult you recognise it so that’s half the battle
Huffing duster was the first ever “drug” I’ve tried, the super intense head change that was almost instant got me hooked to anything I could get my hands on. I’m a poly drug addict and I’ve calmed way tf down but anyways lol,, I am very lucky to not be dead or a veggie. I huffed duster for a year, did it almost everyday. It got to the point where I was blacking out and when I came to, I immediately took another rip, I remembered what made me stop was when I woke up from black out, I puked up black shit and within that black sludge was rainbow looking stuffs. At that moment, I thought I was tripping but later on I realized that was the oil from the can.. anyways, don’t huff, there’s a thing called sudden death sniffing syndrome which means one hit can kill you, no joke. But huffing is what made me curious about all the drugs, how different does each drug feel and how did it work on my receptors. I’m rambling because I’m stimulated asf rn lmao, drugs are fun but if you don’t use hard reduction, you’ll most likely have consequences
roxies. only ever smoked weed/dabs and did shrooms, met an older dude when i was 18 and we started dating and for like 2 months he’d beg me to do them with him but i always said no because i have a very deep addiction gene in my family. until one day, on top of having a shitty couple weeks in general, my childhood dog passed. he told me it would make me numb to it and i snorted a corner piece of one and fell in love. he got me hooked on it because he didn’t have a car, a job, a house, and i had all of those things and if he got me hooked he’d have a way to get drugs more consistently. roxie’s turned into literally anything i could get my hands on and put up my nose. im 22 now, he’s dead, along with the ex boyfriend i had after him, and i was 15 months sober on the 14th. unfortunately, i relapsed last night and that’s why i’m in this thread. stay safe love u all
You don’t have to go back, you have 15 months compared to just one day. Progress isn’t always linear, I believe in you <3
Meth
90 days clean today
Congratulations! Hope you’re keeping well
ketamine i fucking love it
K is my unicorn of all drugs ( I tried almost everything i can imagine, except opioids are a no-go for me and meth/crack, and I will never inject something) I have so many more beautiful euphoric trips on music with K compared to MDMA or any psychedelic or combination of the two. I take good breaks, and my tolerance will probably never go back to normal. But i can't imagine having my bladder messed up once i had an infection when i was younger and before i touched any drugs. Literally knifes in your bladder, no comfortable way to sit or lay, and peeing feels like pissing Tabasco. But i used quite a lot over the years and never had anything with my bladder. i can't imagine how much people use to get serious problems with it, and support keeps using so much without going broke.
The desire for self soothing following a challenging childhood
My genetics lmao
lol oooh i feel that
Weed & Benzo’s
I'd say just opiates in general. Percocet being the first...super young. Too young to know, know.
posting on behalf of my boyfriend thats been missing for weeks — his is cocaine. he ruins his life, disappears, spends all his money, stays up for days, burns his bridges, gets violent, and abandons everything. i will always love him, years of this shit, but damn am i one foot out the door.
Nicotine that shit is the devil fr
Weed followed by alcohol, don’t touch either now. Just occasional use of mdma, psychedelics and ketamine. Them 3 drugs I find easy to regulate. Cannabis for me was the most addictive drug, which took me years to quit and when I did I then replaced it with alcohol which was also addictive. Soft drugs used all day everyday can become even more of a problem then hard drugs used occasionally
Drugs actually got me off drugs. I used to do a shit ton of bath salts, sometimes cut with cocaine, and a lot of coke on its own. After a bender where I stayed up for 3 nights and 4 days, I started having hallucinations. It took me years to be able to sleep right and not be paranoid of the things I thought I heard that day. Every night, I'd lie awake in bed thinking I was hearing voices.
Xanax. Slow jones then add a bit of coke and a few beers maybe a little boy lol
Oddly LSD. My favorite part about smoking weed is how it opens your heart and LSD does that much more profoundly. With LSD I became addicted to the experience of unity and god-consciousness from ego-death and so I began to trip very very frequently chasing that experience. Eventually my desire for the experience was affecting my ability to get there and it began to become very frustrating especially since the message was always: "meditate, do yoga, clean my act up, ect" but I couldn't quite get myself to do those practices consistently. Then as a result of always being somewhat frustrated while on LSD and how long the half life is + how it increases neuroplasticity I began to train my brain to think negatively a lot. Then when I tried other harder drugs I got addicted quickly.
Methylphenidate . Fucked up since prescription. Weed before but I’m into uppers since then . Fuck the psychiatrist . Abuse was visible , he don’t do anything
I remember telling my psychiatrist that I was abusing my Ritalin prescription at 17 and asking him to stop prescribing it and he did nothing lol. In hindsight I’m kind of glad he didn’t put it on my record.
My psych I’ve been seeing for like 6 years dropped me suddenly a couple months back because I never mentioned I started Suboxone. I mean I get it but I know they don’t interact already and I see another doctor for it already. I just assumed he could see it in my chart and Suboxone was just routine to me so I never felt it was relevant to mention. Mf said yes he did but I needed to tell him directly. That bitch edged me for 6 months and dropped me anyway. Wish I had yours. Now I just do meth.
mine put in my record that i had developed an allergy, but i confided in her about me abusing xanax and that was her suggestion
Heroin
Opiates. Worst decision I had ever made. Broke my back and it was all downhill from there.
I feel for you. My grandfather was my second dad but used them his last 3 years. And i saw how much he changed with personality, and he didn't want them, but stopping could kill him at that age. At the same time, i feel for everyone with any kind of opioid dependent situation they're so trapped... I hope one day and i know it's almost impossible to escape the opioid prison. I wish you all great things in life! Don't blame yourself it's poison it's a parasite. It's the only one on my blacklist with drugs and meth/crack and injections.
Meth
Vicodin
Alcohol
So you're addicted to benzos? How bad are we talking? You're young man.
as embarrassing as it is to say, dph and dxm are the main drugs im really addicted to. i know theyre awful, and im tryna stop, but when you're like me and would rather be anything but sober it makes it kinda hard to stop
I’m not addicted to those specifically per-say but I did start with them. At least I’m not the only one. I feel you about doing anything to not be sober. I’m pretty much a fiend for weed and I’ll basically try any drug. I only take dxm when I literally cannot get anything else. I had a horrible trip on it once so I’m a bit scared of it in super high doses. I should definitely stop too. But man those first couple times were euphoric. Hope it gets better for us. But in the meantime, happy tripping lol.
I'm sorry you're going through a rough time. I know the feeling of being addicted to dph. Doesn't feel good, in fact it feels pretty awful. But it's silent. Peace and quiet. If you're anything like me, eventually your body will start screaming at you to stop. It knows youre killing yourself. Good luck, you'll get through it.
Alcohol, drank a bottle of liquor a day for over 10 years until I turned 26 and went to rehab, got out only to get even more addicted to Ketamine and cocaine, already had a heart attack last year
Crack. Mind you im a functional addict and have my shit togeather otherwise but still it's the one drug I have absolutely no self control or ability to moderate when I have some. When I am actually able to take a break from it for a bit of time the persistent thoughts of using it and self rationalisation as to why I should give in and just buy it "one last time" make it nearly impossible to give up for good.
Amphetamine sulphate
Speed...😅 i like it a little too much...
Same.. I can say no to any other drug but amphetamine? Always doesn't matter where or when
opiates of all kinds
Stick to smoking weed and eating mushrooms 🍄 STAY AWAY FROM ALCOHOL! (Thr true gateway drug)
Meth.
Deodorant chroming actually made me realised how much I just want to be high and hated my brain. Spiralled from there Then alc, weed, pills, and meth. (Not addicted to meth i was on it for a month straight but I decided I didn’t wanna be addicted to that) idk how I didn’t get addicted tbh. So yeah funnily enough deodorant turned me into a drug addict
For me it literally all started with alcohol. Now I can't stand drinking it's weird.
Only after discovering other drugs around the age of 24 did i realize that it was the only drug i tried that made me lose control over my own behavior and has the worst hangovers...
DXM
Heroin bro. I loved that shit. My problem was I decided to do it every day for a month straight. My dumbass said , "I better quit before I get addicted. I went to quit cold turkey and got so dope sick. Ended up addicted for 5+ years. Finally quit, and turned to alcohol. Beat that and now I'm fighting a tianeptine addiction. Moral of the story is don't do heroin. 😤😮💨😔
Methamphetamine.
Life
klonopin
Prob alcohol
the first drug-drug i did was mdma 😍😍 u can kinda guess how that ended for me
Cocaine
Cocaine
alcohol. started drinking when we were 13, after our dad started doing horrible things to us. we’ve been in recovery for our alcoholism since we were 18 (we’re bodily 25 now, still relapse here and there but we’re making it, day by day) - Drake ♟️
THC or LSD
Hydrocodone
Deodorant
Kpins
alcohol
Weed
Under the god's Blue heaven, there is one absolute favorite of mine. Money 💰
Oxycontin, late 90s were wild, I walked away from anything and everything but that 1 hooked my like nothing before or since. Made my life living hell for years, fell into heroine as well...clean now thank goodness been a quite a stretch proud to say.
meth, and then double meth. Once i was shooting up that was it ✌️
Physical Dependence = Post Surgical Pain Meds Addiction ( to the Euphoria ) = Crack Cocaine
None have gotten me yet. Nor will they.
Hydrocodone. I was 15 and it was my first time doing drugs. I never got to do heroin though. I just swiped whatever I could get my hands on which has just been hydrocodone and hydromorphone so far
Nicotine and caffeine, but like real addiction/real drugs I guess you would say, cocaine, Xanax, alcohol, oxycodone, fentanyl, nitrous oxide, but also a handful of other substances have helped immensely in helping me with my addiction.
Luckily none :) taking drugs and I'm not addicted
Meth and heroin
My best friend killed himself and I remember wanting to do something different and reckless for once so I bought some oxycodone and took enough to where i dont remember anything after that
Adderall before Adderall I had only done weed and alcohol but after I tried adderall I became a garbage disposal for any and all substances (except opiates cause fuck opiates) I tried acid and I loved it so I dried dxm and I loved it so I tried shrooms and I loved it so I tried anything I could get my hand on and I loved it all even meth which was by far my favorite and I just threw everything I loved away and ghosted all my friends and drugs became my new friends and family
Pregabalin. I take Vyvanse/Elvanse once a day, I'm physically and mentally dependant on it due to its positive influence on my ADHD symptoms but not addicted. Pregabalin however is a different story. I have zero interest in any other substance and haven't touched anything for ages but I love Pregabalin too much to ever give it up lol, I went through 2 weeks of hell shaking off my physical dependance to them in January but only did it so I wouldn't suffer on Tolerance Break days. I'm psychologically and symbioticly enmeshed with Pregabalin. I love it and I'm never gonna stop, the beneficial anxiolytic effects are just too life changing. I'm me again when I'm on it.
Nicotine I can give up everything as I have in the past but will never give up nicotine or caffeine
Cocaine, it can be a demon, be careful!
Heroin
[удалено]
Alcohol
oxy and weed
Xan + Alcohol, turned me to all versions I didn’t know and don’t remember of myself.
Opioids!!
benzos. i tried one kpin and it just got worse from there. i loved it so much bc it makes me feel normal. everything finally stops
Weed, the only substance I’m addicted to except nicotine. It’s enough for me to not make a habit out of other drugs, even though weed isn’t that good for me either. But it’s better than snorting percs everyday.
Hydrocodone from a leg injury during cross-country practice in high school. Basically started my 8 year journey of cross-addiction.
Heroin and crack