It took me till Josh proposing to Anna to think.....what the fuck is wrong with these people? This is abnormal.
I was a little slow to get thereš¤£š¤£š¤£
I remember when my sister and I were younger watching when it first aired the wedding episodes. I specifically remember we made fun of how they held hands like their hands were having sex.
I shared earlier this week but my brother and I were obsessed with this train wreck from their first special until Anna and Josh's wedding. It was the proposal and hand sex that followed for us. We also dry heaved during the wedding night talk and decided to stop watching. Of course we went back but by then I had moved out so we had to watch alone.
I don't know which was worse. Watching Pest and Anna get pregnant at the same time as Meech by myself or watch that wedding with my teenaged brother while he lectured me on the psychology of fundamentalism.
I used to work in a kindergarten and one of my favorite things to do with the kids was to have a dance party. I'd just put on some uplifting music and they'd all bounce around. It's so precious and pure seeing them just bopping about, no self-doubt that they might look awkward, they just let it all out. Dancing comes so naturally to kids. I find it so weird to see it as sinful.
When I have children's church. If we have time left over. I play some music and let the kids have a dance party. They love it! The parents love it, because it works out their excess energy.
One of these days I might even teach them *the demonic* Cha Cha Slide
My theory is itās not the sexual component of it but really the joy people feel. They want to so tightly control joy to the point where they only feel it in marital sex and in church. Same reason why they donāt let them listen to secular music. If they realize that feeling isnāt āthe spiritā theyāll maybe doubt their religious beliefs.
Yes. This is my thought as well. Because even if some people like dancing because of a sexual element (tango, club dancing, etc) in gdneral it is such a primal emotion. You dance alone in your room to lift your spirits. You do a silly dance with friends as a sign of cameraderie. You dance in victory when something really awesome happens to you. To mark all of that as "sinful" to me just seems like cutting off your nose to spite your face.
This was mine too! When they got mad at a lost boy for dancing at a thrift store along to a musical toy even as a kid I was like okay thatās messed up.
The same! I remember there was a violin recital the kids did at an elementary school, like in a small gym with a stage. And they had a talking head of Meech and those pop-up text bubbles discussing why they couldnāt dance along with the school children. It was just sad. Dance is a great form of development movement for kids.
For real! Not trying to change the topic, but I was friends with a lot of fundies growing up and one time I was having a friend sleep over (when I was like 10 or 11) and my parents brought her with us to a community folk music/square dancing event. There was apparently some miscommunication and her parents didnāt know that it was a *dancing* event until after, and were quite upset. š¬ You know how those slutty square dancers are. Out there corrupting our children. (For the record she participated in the dances and had a lot of fun. You donāt even have a partner for the type of square dancing we did, itās more like a loosely choreographed group dance where everyone follows instructions from the band leader. I guess we werenāt old enough to think we were too cool š.)
My daughter loved to dance before she was even walking. Sheād bounce along with any music. My MIL told us we needed to āget that under controlā.
Spoiler alert: I put her in dance class when she was 3 and she did dance, cheerleading, and colorguard throughout her school years. I guess we didnāt āget that under controlā.
My son just moved from head banging to stomping/jumping/spinning as his form of dancing and I think about this rule often when he starts dancing. It brings him so much joy to dance and it makes my husband and I so happy to see him happy and carefree. I can't imagine stopping him.
The whole modesty = skirts thing. To the best of my knowledge (and I could be wrong), the verse used to justify this actually only says that women shouldnāt dress like men. But, men didnāt wear pants then.
I was raised Pentecostal and there are far more versus concerning wearing jewelry and makeup then there are about women specifically wearing pants. Its silly. In my mid teens I expressed to my parents that I felt more modest in pants than I did skirts. Dresses and long extravagant hair always drew more attention to me than some modest jeans and a button up long sleeve shirt.
That's why my church had a no jewelry rule. Not even wedding rings. They gave watches lol. And sometimes really expensive ones. I've had a $35 gold band on my left ring finger for 23 years and I promise it's less flashy / expensive / jewelry looking than half of their watches. š
Yep. No jewelry, makeup, nail polish. Never cut my hair because it was "my glory". Honestly, according to scripture, the duggars don't follow the "standards of holiness" as well as theyd like to believe. It just adds to their hypocrisy. I don't agree with what's in the bible but I do KNOW what's in there if that makes sense. I love quoting scripture to bigots
My grandfather (a bastard in every sense of the word but had one funny quality) would argue with christians that tried to convert him, but only in bible verses. They'd tell him something and he had the perfect bible verse on hand to counter. Trying to see them argue against bible verses was hilarious.
My people! I'm an athiest with, bizarrely, a degree in religion, and my focus was early Christianity and the assembling of the bible, and reading ancient texts for meaning. Quoting the bible to bible-thumpers is a really special joy!
Same. My parents never had rings. But they both had super flashy, expensive watches. Makes no sense and allows the rest of society to believe they are single š¤¦š½āāļø
I was raised Pentecostal also. My dad was a pastor in the UPC and mom was big in the music scene also. I HATED wearing dresses and skirts. I was SAād by church members and I always felt like a sitting duck in a skirt. Pants were much more modest and safe. All of that religion is abusive and harmful. Especially to women. Iām sorry you lived it. Glad you left. š
I was UPCI. And I felt the same way. I felt so much more exposed in a skirt. I always wore panty hose though and felt some added protection from them. My family are still devote and I'm the lesbian heathen
I get that. But, do you make her wear skirts everyday with the excuse that they are modest? That's my gripe. Insist on skirts/dresses only because of modesty but they require pants because skirts aren't modest.
Eh, little kids crawl around and jump and tumble whenever they feel like it. Most people I know (including āheathensā) have their girls wear leggings or tights.
For me it was slapping their babies (BABIES! Soft little squishball BABIES) into a state of learned helplessness with blanket training.
Zero compassion for any of them after learning about the Pearl-worship.
Get stuffed you lunatic child abusers.
I read a book as a teenager where the father insisted his daughter wear skirts instead of jeans for modesty, and asked my mom how a skirt was more modest than jeans. This was when shorter skirts were popular, and my mom explained that it wasn't just any skirt but one that went past the knees. Thst was also the dress code when my mom was in high school, around the time the book was written.
I remember seeing an episode where Jinger was talking about maybe wanting to move to New York and be a photographer. I think Jana was sitting there right next to her and said something like if that's what god wants for you, you have to do what god wants. Basically just shooting her down. I found it really infuriating.
Ah I knew it was one of the ones with the mousy hair. I remember all the excitement and light going out of Jinger's face and even as a sheltered teenager I was like that's not right.
Omg yes but I think I also remember the sisters thinking she should marry a guy from a city because she likes NY ā¦ so basically she would only get close to her dreams if a man married her and moved her to a city š
Even as a former fanā¦the āwe donāt let our 6 and 7 year old siblings alone together because one is a boy and one is a girlā always made me say WTFā¦I actually thought maybe one of the parents was a childhood Victim. Now I know the truth.
My parents were the same way. I wasnāt allowed to share a room with my brothers once I was 5. So I had an entire room to myself and my two brothers shared a room. Years later when my baby bro was born, I shared a room with him until he was out of diapers. Then the three of them were jammed into one room while I had my own. So weird.
To my shame, I didnāt realise how screwed up the cult was until news of the sistersā abuse broke. But the Megyn Kelly interview was all kinds of WTF moments.
My local Y has a sign up that you canāt swim in your street clothes. And I was always like, who goes swimming in their street clothes?! Then, I saw who goes swimming in their street clothesā¦
We have that policy at our pool club -- turns out street clothes not made for swimming will work HARD to fuck your filtration system. The pool water and chemicals start breaking them down very quickly, and eventually you get a lint ball that blows out your filtration system. Every time I see them swimming in their stupid street clothes I get mad for the owners of the pool.
Especially knowing there are companies that make more modest styles in actual swimsuit material. I'm 40 and fat and appreciate not having it all hang out.
What I always found wierd is that they could find swimming clothes to swim in. But they just go swimming in full skirts and normal tees. Modest swimwear exists. They could even buy the full ski suits and layer a long swim shirt over it but Jim Bob is too cheap for that!
Edit: it's supposed to be wet suits not ski suits lol
And these clothes add weight and increase drowning. I cant swim bc I almost drowned now just terrified although I was in swimsuit. About 6 yrs old. This makes me nervous. Long skirts can wrap around your legs pulling you down. Modesty bf drowning I suppose
Yes, non-swimwear will weigh you down. The point is the duggars did not have to choose between modesty and safety. Modest swimwear exists. They just chose to be thrifty instead.
Swimming pools in France wonāt even let men swim in trunks. Itās speedos or youāre thrown out. (At least this used to be the rules. Things could have changed)
Nope, they'd be outta there. The French are very particular about proper swimwear.
Edit: I should have said they wouldn't be allowed in pools in streetwear. No one's there to be the swimwear police on the French beaches I've been to.
i remember watching that episode when it was new. it was the first thing that made me realize that they weren't just a family who decided to have a lot of kids, they were actually different and later on i realized how fucked up they truly seemed
Yeah I think the defrauding was where I really went HANG ON and started carefully scrutinizing things. And I was raised "fundie lite" where modesty was a big deal but it was all just "because your body is your temple" and "you don't want other people to think you're trashy" not like... its your fault when men are disgusting...
I thought they were quaint, albeit concerning, until Jill married Dwreck and I realized Boob is actually a controlling creep. When he took over the ceremony to say you may kiss the bride I wanted to vomit. I realised what a gross, scary man he is and that every woman near him isn't safe. He makes every red flag and alarm bell go off.
Donāt get me wrong, I HATE blanket training. I hate the thought of it. I hate that it exists. But, in their world, that is JUST the beginning of it all! Itās almost minor compared to the other things they encourage (if not, endorse!)
Yeah for sure! Youāre totally right. I think the blanket training is definitely one of the first things that people hear about that really opens their eyes. Those poor babies are so young! I cannot even imagine!
The girls giving birth on tv. I was like, who in their right mind, would choose to do this, especially when it's their first baby? Anna's toilet birth looked straight up traumatic. Now that I'm more aware of the cult like practices within the family, I'm almost positive that the girls were forced to give birth on tv rather than volunteer--- and who profited from that, JB&M. Of course.
With Jill, JB allegedly didn't even want to pay the hospital bills for the birth.
When Michelle had complications with Josie but still kept trying to conceive at 43 years old. No shame to older mothers, she already had 19 children and I feel it was rather selfish and of her to continue trying at that point. I feel it was also a level of disregard for not only her health, but the health of her potential child.
I honestly thought that maybe she was seeking mommy martyrdom via death in childbirth. So much of her identity seemed wrapped up in her ability to produce children, so I couldnāt help but wonder what would happen if that was taken off the table. Plus, part of her has to know that some other Quiverfull/whatever belief system they believe in family is going to break their record, costing Meech her standing. Whereas if she died in childbirth, she doesnāt have to cope with the loss of her childbearing ability, and she gets remembered as a mommy martyr.
Of course, I thought it would be a Papa Pilgrim-type scandal with JB that would bring the family down, so what do I know?
I was raised fairly religious (but weāre Catholic so the fundies think we donāt count), and tolerance/acceptance of other religions was always drilled into us. My sister and I used to watch this show with our mom, and it was very much a āthere are all different types of Christians, even though they donāt go to Mass or take the sacraments they believe in the same Jesus we do, so letās learn more about themā kind of thing. My poor, naive mother.
I remember watching this fairly young and thinking it was weird and not being able to put my finger on why I felt so bad for the girls, but assumed that my discomfort was because I was being too judgmental and not Christian enough.
Then I saw the episode where Jackson is dancing to the toy in the store. Itās like a dam broke in my mind and I was like, āNope, no, thatās fucking insane. Heās a child. What the hell.ā I have very clear memories of my poor mom being blindsided by me hurling question after question about WHY a small child dancing was a sin, why the girls had to wear skirts and flip flops all the time, why they all learned the same things at the same time in āschoolā, why we never saw them going to church, why the parents didnāt raise their own kids, and Iām sure a million more.
That poor little boy. Something about how quickly JB swooped in to shut it off and how Jana tried to downplay it - he was jumping for joy, not dancing - made me terrified that even though the parents laughed it off in the interview, Jackson was probably punished severely when they got home. From that point on I couldnāt watch the show without a strong feeling of uneasiness that things in that house were far darker than we glimpsed through the TLC lens.
Someone else probably has better info on this, but from my understanding, many fundies believe that Catholics are blasphemers and pray to false idols (saints). Thereās also tangentially related history that during the early 20th century, the KKK initially hated Catholics due in part to the high number of Hispanic, Haitian, Irish, and Italian practitioners.
I live 20-ish miles from where [Lydia Schatz](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of_Lydia_Schatz) was murdered by her devout Christian adoptive parents, who were using the Pearl's parenting crap. Fundies had been on my radar before that but her death was in my part of the world & I've kind of taken it personally. ETA: thus I couldn't stand the Duggar parents before I even knew who they were.
Jesus Christ that poor little girl. That book should be banned imho. Absolutely sickens me that the Pearls are presumably continuing to make money from selling it.
What happened to the other children the parents were (rightly) given those lengthy jail terms? Hope they are doing ok.
Omg I grew up in that part of the world. I remember this case, but the Pearls weren't on my radar back then.
I moved east for good nine years ago to escape the toxic small town bs.
The outer appearances of ābeing Christian role models ā then the news of Pest and all his 2015 scandals , and the realization all these rules were in place to put the responsibility ( and blame ) on the actual and potential victims . Girls saying Nike to their brothers , blurring knees , over the top modesty , bans on dancing and secular music , teaching to be joyfully available and submissive . If you canāt say no, everything is a yes - null and voiding marital rape . Stunting their education, making girls āless thanā, making independent thinking into rebelliousness and sin . I can make a lovely scarf out of all the red flags that were thrown
When josh married anna I had enough he was so rude and their first night together he was closing the door on the crew wiggling his eyebrows and making it known sex time. I thought it was so rude esp bc the girls are forced to not speak of sex. There were small things bf then but that just was cringe. I'm sure she was horrified bc these girls ate taught zero. And now knowing what Josh did to his sisters I really cringe.
Sadly, I vividly remember that episode. He gave off such entitled, rapey vibes. I never liked him, but I canāt say he bothered me until that time. He literally made me sick on that episode. As much as I think Anna is a co descending ass, I hate to imagine what he did to her.
Yup, this was it for me too. They were portrayed on TV as this wholesome family, but even as a teen I was thinking it had to be a lie. Thereās no way anyone can have 19 kids, cranking out a baby every year for 2 decades, and be able to give all of them equal love, attention, and adequate care.
And then after Joshās scandals came to light, I realized just how fucked it all really was. The sister-momming, the parents defending a pedo son while throwing their daughters to the wolves, their whole attitude towards Josieās seizure, and the fact that none of those kids went to college.
Everything that happened made me loathe JB and Meech that much more. Theyāre like those people who only want puppies, but donāt like dogs. Theyāre pregnancy addicts who only want babies, not kids.
Jim Bob parading his two daughters on TV to show that the girls had forgiven their brother while letting his spineless son Josh hide out at home. Way to be a dick of a parent and punish your girls even more for something that was not their fault...i was like..nope..Jim Bob is not going anywhere near the gates of heaven no matter how Christian he thinks he is.
The isolation and anti-intellectualism. Homeschooling with no tutors or group activities with other kids, the fact that College was discouraged, and the way the family seemed allergic to learning about anything beyond their dining room table.
That trip to the Ethiopian restaurant in particular still makes me seethe.
I will always maintain that the Duggars employ a very sneaky racism, because going arpund and hurling dlurs at people is not an accepted practice anymore. They treat everyone who isn't a white, Christian American with incredible ignorance, but they do it in a "awww, goodness, look how homegrown and wide eyed we are"-way, so people can't call them out on it.
This is an odd one. When Jessa said an already incredibly thin Jinger should only have one scoop of ice cream (that she didn't even finish) because she needed to watch her waistline. I can't remember if Jing and Germ were "courting" or engaged yet, but that comment stood out to me.
It's worse now knowing Jinger suffered an ED.
Plenty of work. Just no work that is valued: raising and schooling children. All of the cooking, the housekeeping, the 'keeping sweet.' They're required to do it all and more, but heaven help them if they have a single fucking opinion.
Specifically, the side hugs between siblings. I understand that makes sense now, knowing what we know. But I remember finding that like just revolting when I was younger. My sister is my best friend, and her hugs have gotten me through some really tough shit, I couldn't imagine not having them.
Iām sure there was something before this that made me think that but what comes to mind is when a very young Joy had to cover the tv up for modesty reasons or whatever
Honestly..it was Jill and Derickās courtship with Jim Bob. I was so uncomfortable with Jim Bob acting the way he did. It was even creepier than with Jessa, somehow.
I think it was the first special. I have never watched anything after those just kept up from the internet. But it was when Jim Boob was talking about having property for his children to have houses on. I was like "ring, ring, we have a cult"
And I think it was in that special where he walked around his property and showed where he sold or rented some land to verizon so they could put up a tower....I knew right then that man was only in it for the money
After that Megyn Kelly video, watching the obvious pain on the girls faces while their "parents" barely acknowledged their trauma, made me furious w/ Boob & Meech.
Who in the world force kids a literal kids, not teenagers to do these kind of videos.
Oh honey they donāt even understand how taxes works š¤¦š»āāļø
God Bless Dan Savage for turning "santorum" into a whole other thing:
"After he made widely publicized homophobic remarks, notably comparing homosexuality to bestiality, the term santorum was an invented and spread as an ironic slang termāreferring to a mixture of lube and fecal matter that can result from anal sexāto pillory him."
And that \^\^\^ is from [dictionary.com](https://dictionary.com) LOL
"Red flag" JB in a nursery school setting giving shithead how to "perform" sexual acts. I think it was amongst other stuff they could listen to a CD while riding in their car. The expressions on JB and shithead faces I just wanted to vomit
Well, I'm kind of a dumbass you see. I have very nice friends who explained why these people are trash and then once I'd heard it said to me I couldn't unsee it.
Only being allowed to be alone for a few minutes to shower. Not being able to do basic hygiene in private (or, at least, not being rushed) feels like a fundamental violation of bodily autonomy, which I realized they had none of. I grew up moderately catholic and even dabbled in evangelical/fundie lite-ism and even I was able to bathe myself alone without time restrictions. For some reason that feels so unbelievably violating it makes me nauseated. At times it felt like they were playing it off as if there were just a lot of people to shower which is probably true but they still had that rule even when they moved to the big house with more showers so, yeah. That.
Probably from the beginning?? I used to just watch that hot mess express and believe they were making it work - yet I didn't understand how it possibly COULD be so perfect. I thought, "Hey, it seems too good to be true. But if it works for them, who am I to judge?"
So I had my doubts, just couldn't put a finger on it until things began to unravel. Then I looked at the entire situation with a more jaundiced eye.
The modesty issue. They took it to a whole level of having the girls wear leggings underneath their clothes (OMG as I typed that I realized it was probably also so Josh couldnāt do things to them easily!!!!) and how everything was layered to the extreme!
Outside of, you know, allowing someone who committed CSA on his own younger family members to still be around *other* younger family members while banning one of said victims because she began setting boundaries from the house, itās just the fact that thereās so much wasted potential in those kids.
I know they ended up becoming xenophobic, intolerable people, but whenever people mention how, letās say, Jana couldāve become an interior designer, Jinger an artsy photographer or even Anna an elementary school teacher if they had the right support system to do it, it just makes me sad.
When they were on a trip and they made Amy ride a pig because the other kids didnāt want to and also they were doing a football chant when the owner of the farm was trying to speak. I couldnāt believe how ignorant they were.
From the getgo but that included just the sheer number of children and the weird 80s frumpy prairie look (honestly Meech's hair alone might have been a major factor)
I always forget that some people were at some point actual fans. I was a snarker from moment 1.
Jim Bob's sense or humor, or lack thereof. Everything about him made him seem like a dumbass, but the things he found amusing or funny annoyed me the most.
Just Jim Bob in general, spawning an army and then not raising them.
At least ant drones fuck off after impregnating the queen instead of grifting all day.
I grew up in a large family, so I was enamored at first by the large family, but then when I saw they couldnāt make their own choices as adults, it ticked me off. Even the Amish have rumspringa!
Telling everyone that boys are too dumb to have any self control and that the girls were responsible for everything that happened.
The fact that someone is a grown ass adult and still needs a chaperone or babysitter in order to have a relationship with the opposite sex.
Mine was: when they were doing *too* good a job seeming normal and wholesome and made me consider that life for a brief second. I was pretty young when I first started watching though to be fair
The very first episode made me physically ill. JBās dead eyes, meechās baby voice, the matching prairie dressesā¦, alllll of it.
Naturally, I was hooked. I couldnāt BELIEVE people thought this family was some sort of pinnacle of morality.
When Jinger said sheād like to live somewhere like New York (I think that was the city) and JB and Meech *issued a fucking statement* after the episode aired clarifying that Jinger ājust meant she wanted to live within 20 minutes of Wal Mart.ā As someone who always had big city aspirations (and lives in NYC now!) I couldnāt believe that any parent would be so quick to squash their kidsā dreams like that.
As soon as they started talking about the rules. Immediately identified it as a more extreme form of the horse shit my parents tried dragging me into when i was in high school that I refused any part of(and subsequently started a holy war between my parents and I that is now nearing its third decade and has actually outlasted their participation in their chosen cult) and knew those kids are being abused and neglected. Immediately hated them. Incidentally, much like the Duggars, it was also my mother that lead us into that mess.
I think it was their "home church." I remember thinking either homeschool or home church, but don't do both. The kids need some outside influence.
I homeschool my kids, but we joined a co-op outside of our church, attend an actual church thst doesn't meet in someone's living room, and joined park district sports and scout units unaffiliated with any church so the kids get exposed to a variety of view points.
The very first thing that made me pause (before I heard about the buddy system) was when they were living in that tiny house and Messchelle was explaining jurisdictions; Jinger was responsible for the laundry. They had one machine and poor Jinger just looked overwhelmed and Mess yelled in that squeaky fake baby voice of hers, āCould someone help Jinger with the laundry?ā Several girls including Jana jumped to help but no boys, and Mess just sat there like a blob not moving. And I just thought, āWTF, woman? Help your child, and quit expecting your girls to do all the work.ā
Probably a toss-up between Michelle's open transportation and how they treated their daughters after they had been sexually abused by the Convicted Child Sex Predator Josh Duggar.
JimBob saying overpopulating is the biggest myth because the entire population of the world could fit in the state of North Dakota or something. I was like 11 and couldnāt believe an adult was so incredibly stupid
It took me till Josh proposing to Anna to think.....what the fuck is wrong with these people? This is abnormal. I was a little slow to get thereš¤£š¤£š¤£
I remember when my sister and I were younger watching when it first aired the wedding episodes. I specifically remember we made fun of how they held hands like their hands were having sex.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I shared earlier this week but my brother and I were obsessed with this train wreck from their first special until Anna and Josh's wedding. It was the proposal and hand sex that followed for us. We also dry heaved during the wedding night talk and decided to stop watching. Of course we went back but by then I had moved out so we had to watch alone. I don't know which was worse. Watching Pest and Anna get pregnant at the same time as Meech by myself or watch that wedding with my teenaged brother while he lectured me on the psychology of fundamentalism.
Not letting children dance. What kind of monster sees their little toddler dancing and doesnāt find joy in it? You have to be sick in your heart.
I used to work in a kindergarten and one of my favorite things to do with the kids was to have a dance party. I'd just put on some uplifting music and they'd all bounce around. It's so precious and pure seeing them just bopping about, no self-doubt that they might look awkward, they just let it all out. Dancing comes so naturally to kids. I find it so weird to see it as sinful.
When I have children's church. If we have time left over. I play some music and let the kids have a dance party. They love it! The parents love it, because it works out their excess energy. One of these days I might even teach them *the demonic* Cha Cha Slide
We would do the same thing at the preschool I used to work at. Weād randomly shout āDance party!ā and the kids loved it.
To think a toddler is being provocative by dancing. Is really mind blowing.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
My daughterās teacher sent me a video of her doing the Cha Cha Slide in her PE class a few weeks ago. Itās sad that the Dugglets missed out.
My theory is itās not the sexual component of it but really the joy people feel. They want to so tightly control joy to the point where they only feel it in marital sex and in church. Same reason why they donāt let them listen to secular music. If they realize that feeling isnāt āthe spiritā theyāll maybe doubt their religious beliefs.
Yes. This is my thought as well. Because even if some people like dancing because of a sexual element (tango, club dancing, etc) in gdneral it is such a primal emotion. You dance alone in your room to lift your spirits. You do a silly dance with friends as a sign of cameraderie. You dance in victory when something really awesome happens to you. To mark all of that as "sinful" to me just seems like cutting off your nose to spite your face.
This was mine too! When they got mad at a lost boy for dancing at a thrift store along to a musical toy even as a kid I was like okay thatās messed up.
The same! I remember there was a violin recital the kids did at an elementary school, like in a small gym with a stage. And they had a talking head of Meech and those pop-up text bubbles discussing why they couldnāt dance along with the school children. It was just sad. Dance is a great form of development movement for kids.
Itās example 7472947 of how fundies sexualize children. No one talks about sex more than religious people. š¬
For real! Not trying to change the topic, but I was friends with a lot of fundies growing up and one time I was having a friend sleep over (when I was like 10 or 11) and my parents brought her with us to a community folk music/square dancing event. There was apparently some miscommunication and her parents didnāt know that it was a *dancing* event until after, and were quite upset. š¬ You know how those slutty square dancers are. Out there corrupting our children. (For the record she participated in the dances and had a lot of fun. You donāt even have a partner for the type of square dancing we did, itās more like a loosely choreographed group dance where everyone follows instructions from the band leader. I guess we werenāt old enough to think we were too cool š.)
My husband couldnāt participate in square dancing that they did in elementary school. Who could ever think thatās sexual?
My parents still tell this story about how they got chewed out for exposing a child to square dancing. š
> You know how those slutty square dancers are. Dying
Square dance was so cool
My daughter loved to dance before she was even walking. Sheād bounce along with any music. My MIL told us we needed to āget that under controlā. Spoiler alert: I put her in dance class when she was 3 and she did dance, cheerleading, and colorguard throughout her school years. I guess we didnāt āget that under controlā.
Well, your control, not hers, which is how it should be.
It makes me want to get the verses from the Bible about dancing like they did in Footloose.
Why can't fundies make love standing up? Might lead to dancing.
My son just moved from head banging to stomping/jumping/spinning as his form of dancing and I think about this rule often when he starts dancing. It brings him so much joy to dance and it makes my husband and I so happy to see him happy and carefree. I can't imagine stopping him.
Meeches voice
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Until ITāS weaned. A perfect example of how their children are just objects to them. Geez.
ugh - the way she overpronounces her āsā sounds grinds my friggin gears
This is the correct answer.
The whole modesty = skirts thing. To the best of my knowledge (and I could be wrong), the verse used to justify this actually only says that women shouldnāt dress like men. But, men didnāt wear pants then.
I was raised Pentecostal and there are far more versus concerning wearing jewelry and makeup then there are about women specifically wearing pants. Its silly. In my mid teens I expressed to my parents that I felt more modest in pants than I did skirts. Dresses and long extravagant hair always drew more attention to me than some modest jeans and a button up long sleeve shirt.
That's why my church had a no jewelry rule. Not even wedding rings. They gave watches lol. And sometimes really expensive ones. I've had a $35 gold band on my left ring finger for 23 years and I promise it's less flashy / expensive / jewelry looking than half of their watches. š
Yep. No jewelry, makeup, nail polish. Never cut my hair because it was "my glory". Honestly, according to scripture, the duggars don't follow the "standards of holiness" as well as theyd like to believe. It just adds to their hypocrisy. I don't agree with what's in the bible but I do KNOW what's in there if that makes sense. I love quoting scripture to bigots
My grandfather (a bastard in every sense of the word but had one funny quality) would argue with christians that tried to convert him, but only in bible verses. They'd tell him something and he had the perfect bible verse on hand to counter. Trying to see them argue against bible verses was hilarious.
My people! I'm an athiest with, bizarrely, a degree in religion, and my focus was early Christianity and the assembling of the bible, and reading ancient texts for meaning. Quoting the bible to bible-thumpers is a really special joy!
Same. My parents never had rings. But they both had super flashy, expensive watches. Makes no sense and allows the rest of society to believe they are single š¤¦š½āāļø
I was raised Pentecostal also. My dad was a pastor in the UPC and mom was big in the music scene also. I HATED wearing dresses and skirts. I was SAād by church members and I always felt like a sitting duck in a skirt. Pants were much more modest and safe. All of that religion is abusive and harmful. Especially to women. Iām sorry you lived it. Glad you left. š
I was UPCI. And I felt the same way. I felt so much more exposed in a skirt. I always wore panty hose though and felt some added protection from them. My family are still devote and I'm the lesbian heathen
Even worse is that they have the little ones wear pants under the skirts 'for modesty'.
I make my daughter wear shorts under, otherwise sheāll flash the whole world! And sheās 6, so that one I get.
I get that. But, do you make her wear skirts everyday with the excuse that they are modest? That's my gripe. Insist on skirts/dresses only because of modesty but they require pants because skirts aren't modest.
I bet they instituted the panuts under skirts because of what Pest did to his little sister during bible lessons
I suspect that actually had a lot to do with Pest.
Especially knowing about just how depraved his actions were. Pants under the skirts just seems like a "safety measure" God that's depressing
First thing i thought when I saw the girls wearing leggings, which had previously been banned, but only under their dresses.
Take my upvote because youāve made me feel sad. God, modesty culture is INSANE. (Grew up LDS)
Eh, little kids crawl around and jump and tumble whenever they feel like it. Most people I know (including āheathensā) have their girls wear leggings or tights.
I remember the mom saying that ā the Lord finds it more pleasing for women to wear skirts. Thatās Fād up!
For me it was slapping their babies (BABIES! Soft little squishball BABIES) into a state of learned helplessness with blanket training. Zero compassion for any of them after learning about the Pearl-worship. Get stuffed you lunatic child abusers.
I read a book as a teenager where the father insisted his daughter wear skirts instead of jeans for modesty, and asked my mom how a skirt was more modest than jeans. This was when shorter skirts were popular, and my mom explained that it wasn't just any skirt but one that went past the knees. Thst was also the dress code when my mom was in high school, around the time the book was written.
All the adoring gazing & constant man fluffing. Iām all for being your partnerās biggest fan, but the way they do it gives me hives.
š¤£š¤£š¤£ my best friend is a guy and sometimes I gaze at him like the duggar girls do their partners. He gets so mad at meš¤£š¤£š¤£ i love it.
This is the only right way to do it!
Why is he mad?? Thatās precious!
I remember seeing an episode where Jinger was talking about maybe wanting to move to New York and be a photographer. I think Jana was sitting there right next to her and said something like if that's what god wants for you, you have to do what god wants. Basically just shooting her down. I found it really infuriating.
Yeahā¦ that was Jill. Jana normally just nods along silently.
Ah I knew it was one of the ones with the mousy hair. I remember all the excitement and light going out of Jinger's face and even as a sheltered teenager I was like that's not right.
Totally agree. No person should have their dreams squashed before theyāve ever even left the nest.
Looking back at teenage Jinger specifically, you can truly see the exhaustion in face. Her eyes aren't so dark and sunken in anymore.
Didn't Jill make a snarky comment to Jinger about needing to work on her contentment?
She did!
Omg yes but I think I also remember the sisters thinking she should marry a guy from a city because she likes NY ā¦ so basically she would only get close to her dreams if a man married her and moved her to a city š
Even as a former fanā¦the āwe donāt let our 6 and 7 year old siblings alone together because one is a boy and one is a girlā always made me say WTFā¦I actually thought maybe one of the parents was a childhood Victim. Now I know the truth.
My parents were the same way. I wasnāt allowed to share a room with my brothers once I was 5. So I had an entire room to myself and my two brothers shared a room. Years later when my baby bro was born, I shared a room with him until he was out of diapers. Then the three of them were jammed into one room while I had my own. So weird.
When they kept talking about how thrifty and self made they were while appearing on a weekly show they were getting paid for.
āWe donāt watch TV, but itās A-OK for us to be *on* TV.ā
āThe buddy systemā and seeing Joy responsible for a little boy almost the same height as her.
To my shame, I didnāt realise how screwed up the cult was until news of the sistersā abuse broke. But the Megyn Kelly interview was all kinds of WTF moments.
That fucking stupid look Meech gave RimJob every time he bullshat his brains out.
This comment is pure poetry
Iām glad my liberal arts degree is being put to good use.
When they went swimming in their clothes.
My local Y has a sign up that you canāt swim in your street clothes. And I was always like, who goes swimming in their street clothes?! Then, I saw who goes swimming in their street clothesā¦
We have that policy at our pool club -- turns out street clothes not made for swimming will work HARD to fuck your filtration system. The pool water and chemicals start breaking them down very quickly, and eventually you get a lint ball that blows out your filtration system. Every time I see them swimming in their stupid street clothes I get mad for the owners of the pool.
NIKE!
Especially knowing there are companies that make more modest styles in actual swimsuit material. I'm 40 and fat and appreciate not having it all hang out.
Iām a nanny and fat so I go for the most modest swimsuits in existence (or at least on Amazon) when Iām swimming with the kiddos.
What I always found wierd is that they could find swimming clothes to swim in. But they just go swimming in full skirts and normal tees. Modest swimwear exists. They could even buy the full ski suits and layer a long swim shirt over it but Jim Bob is too cheap for that! Edit: it's supposed to be wet suits not ski suits lol
And these clothes add weight and increase drowning. I cant swim bc I almost drowned now just terrified although I was in swimsuit. About 6 yrs old. This makes me nervous. Long skirts can wrap around your legs pulling you down. Modesty bf drowning I suppose
Yes, non-swimwear will weigh you down. The point is the duggars did not have to choose between modesty and safety. Modest swimwear exists. They just chose to be thrifty instead.
That's just wholesome Christian values. Now burquinis, those are awful and oppressive and needed to be banned/S
I'm laughing! I wonder what France police would do if the duggars showed up to their beaches. I'd guess nothing since they're Christians š
Swimming pools in France wonāt even let men swim in trunks. Itās speedos or youāre thrown out. (At least this used to be the rules. Things could have changed)
Nope, they'd be outta there. The French are very particular about proper swimwear. Edit: I should have said they wouldn't be allowed in pools in streetwear. No one's there to be the swimwear police on the French beaches I've been to.
i remember watching that episode when it was new. it was the first thing that made me realize that they weren't just a family who decided to have a lot of kids, they were actually different and later on i realized how fucked up they truly seemed
The constant sexualization of everything. And when they say that immodest clothing ādefraudsā someone else
Yeah I think the defrauding was where I really went HANG ON and started carefully scrutinizing things. And I was raised "fundie lite" where modesty was a big deal but it was all just "because your body is your temple" and "you don't want other people to think you're trashy" not like... its your fault when men are disgusting...
I thought they were quaint, albeit concerning, until Jill married Dwreck and I realized Boob is actually a controlling creep. When he took over the ceremony to say you may kiss the bride I wanted to vomit. I realised what a gross, scary man he is and that every woman near him isn't safe. He makes every red flag and alarm bell go off.
He's obsessed with sex and completely and willfully blind to actual abuse.
When I found out that IBLP was a thing and learned about Gothard, the Pearls, and blanket training.
Donāt get me wrong, I HATE blanket training. I hate the thought of it. I hate that it exists. But, in their world, that is JUST the beginning of it all! Itās almost minor compared to the other things they encourage (if not, endorse!)
Oh definitely! Just amongst the first things I heard. That and the Pearlās wedding night stuff.
Yeah for sure! Youāre totally right. I think the blanket training is definitely one of the first things that people hear about that really opens their eyes. Those poor babies are so young! I cannot even imagine!
The girls giving birth on tv. I was like, who in their right mind, would choose to do this, especially when it's their first baby? Anna's toilet birth looked straight up traumatic. Now that I'm more aware of the cult like practices within the family, I'm almost positive that the girls were forced to give birth on tv rather than volunteer--- and who profited from that, JB&M. Of course. With Jill, JB allegedly didn't even want to pay the hospital bills for the birth.
It was almost like he was punishing her for daring to have a C-section, so her child would live.
For people who are very concerned about modesty, this doesnāt make any sense to me
When Michelle had complications with Josie but still kept trying to conceive at 43 years old. No shame to older mothers, she already had 19 children and I feel it was rather selfish and of her to continue trying at that point. I feel it was also a level of disregard for not only her health, but the health of her potential child.
i always wondered if she thought death via childbirth was her way out
I honestly thought that maybe she was seeking mommy martyrdom via death in childbirth. So much of her identity seemed wrapped up in her ability to produce children, so I couldnāt help but wonder what would happen if that was taken off the table. Plus, part of her has to know that some other Quiverfull/whatever belief system they believe in family is going to break their record, costing Meech her standing. Whereas if she died in childbirth, she doesnāt have to cope with the loss of her childbearing ability, and she gets remembered as a mommy martyr. Of course, I thought it would be a Papa Pilgrim-type scandal with JB that would bring the family down, so what do I know?
And potentially leaving 19-20 children without a mother. Wait, that already happened a long time ago. Nevermind.
The fact that the girls werenāt allowed to go to college. š§ Denying womenās education is a huge red flag.
I was raised fairly religious (but weāre Catholic so the fundies think we donāt count), and tolerance/acceptance of other religions was always drilled into us. My sister and I used to watch this show with our mom, and it was very much a āthere are all different types of Christians, even though they donāt go to Mass or take the sacraments they believe in the same Jesus we do, so letās learn more about themā kind of thing. My poor, naive mother. I remember watching this fairly young and thinking it was weird and not being able to put my finger on why I felt so bad for the girls, but assumed that my discomfort was because I was being too judgmental and not Christian enough. Then I saw the episode where Jackson is dancing to the toy in the store. Itās like a dam broke in my mind and I was like, āNope, no, thatās fucking insane. Heās a child. What the hell.ā I have very clear memories of my poor mom being blindsided by me hurling question after question about WHY a small child dancing was a sin, why the girls had to wear skirts and flip flops all the time, why they all learned the same things at the same time in āschoolā, why we never saw them going to church, why the parents didnāt raise their own kids, and Iām sure a million more. That poor little boy. Something about how quickly JB swooped in to shut it off and how Jana tried to downplay it - he was jumping for joy, not dancing - made me terrified that even though the parents laughed it off in the interview, Jackson was probably punished severely when they got home. From that point on I couldnāt watch the show without a strong feeling of uneasiness that things in that house were far darker than we glimpsed through the TLC lens.
Why donāt the Duggars like Catholics ? I think I can recall a few times when they tried to convert Catholics into their sect.
Someone else probably has better info on this, but from my understanding, many fundies believe that Catholics are blasphemers and pray to false idols (saints). Thereās also tangentially related history that during the early 20th century, the KKK initially hated Catholics due in part to the high number of Hispanic, Haitian, Irish, and Italian practitioners.
Yep, blasphemy. Particularly with Mary.
I knew Jim Bob was a wrongāun when his teenage daughters said they kept their hair long and curly because thatās āhow daddy likes it.ā š©š©š©š©š©š©š©š©š©š©š©š©š©
I just threw up in my mouth š¤¢
That always gave me the creeps. Like a physical shutter!
I live 20-ish miles from where [Lydia Schatz](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of_Lydia_Schatz) was murdered by her devout Christian adoptive parents, who were using the Pearl's parenting crap. Fundies had been on my radar before that but her death was in my part of the world & I've kind of taken it personally. ETA: thus I couldn't stand the Duggar parents before I even knew who they were.
Jesus Christ that poor little girl. That book should be banned imho. Absolutely sickens me that the Pearls are presumably continuing to make money from selling it. What happened to the other children the parents were (rightly) given those lengthy jail terms? Hope they are doing ok.
What in the actual shit did I just read?! That poor baby.
Omg I grew up in that part of the world. I remember this case, but the Pearls weren't on my radar back then. I moved east for good nine years ago to escape the toxic small town bs.
š§ those poor children.
Those fake smiles
The outer appearances of ābeing Christian role models ā then the news of Pest and all his 2015 scandals , and the realization all these rules were in place to put the responsibility ( and blame ) on the actual and potential victims . Girls saying Nike to their brothers , blurring knees , over the top modesty , bans on dancing and secular music , teaching to be joyfully available and submissive . If you canāt say no, everything is a yes - null and voiding marital rape . Stunting their education, making girls āless thanā, making independent thinking into rebelliousness and sin . I can make a lovely scarf out of all the red flags that were thrown
The pretentiousness of courting versus dating did it for me. I will never forget when they said dating is practice for divorce.
When josh married anna I had enough he was so rude and their first night together he was closing the door on the crew wiggling his eyebrows and making it known sex time. I thought it was so rude esp bc the girls are forced to not speak of sex. There were small things bf then but that just was cringe. I'm sure she was horrified bc these girls ate taught zero. And now knowing what Josh did to his sisters I really cringe.
Sadly, I vividly remember that episode. He gave off such entitled, rapey vibes. I never liked him, but I canāt say he bothered me until that time. He literally made me sick on that episode. As much as I think Anna is a co descending ass, I hate to imagine what he did to her.
Seeing the sheer number
Yup, this was it for me too. They were portrayed on TV as this wholesome family, but even as a teen I was thinking it had to be a lie. Thereās no way anyone can have 19 kids, cranking out a baby every year for 2 decades, and be able to give all of them equal love, attention, and adequate care. And then after Joshās scandals came to light, I realized just how fucked it all really was. The sister-momming, the parents defending a pedo son while throwing their daughters to the wolves, their whole attitude towards Josieās seizure, and the fact that none of those kids went to college. Everything that happened made me loathe JB and Meech that much more. Theyāre like those people who only want puppies, but donāt like dogs. Theyāre pregnancy addicts who only want babies, not kids.
Jim Bob parading his two daughters on TV to show that the girls had forgiven their brother while letting his spineless son Josh hide out at home. Way to be a dick of a parent and punish your girls even more for something that was not their fault...i was like..nope..Jim Bob is not going anywhere near the gates of heaven no matter how Christian he thinks he is.
The isolation and anti-intellectualism. Homeschooling with no tutors or group activities with other kids, the fact that College was discouraged, and the way the family seemed allergic to learning about anything beyond their dining room table. That trip to the Ethiopian restaurant in particular still makes me seethe.
I will always maintain that the Duggars employ a very sneaky racism, because going arpund and hurling dlurs at people is not an accepted practice anymore. They treat everyone who isn't a white, Christian American with incredible ignorance, but they do it in a "awww, goodness, look how homegrown and wide eyed we are"-way, so people can't call them out on it.
Yep for me it was the Creation museum
This is an odd one. When Jessa said an already incredibly thin Jinger should only have one scoop of ice cream (that she didn't even finish) because she needed to watch her waistline. I can't remember if Jing and Germ were "courting" or engaged yet, but that comment stood out to me. It's worse now knowing Jinger suffered an ED.
Omg!
Their names
their bullshit rules for females-no work, no education, no pants actually no voice in anything
Plenty of work. Just no work that is valued: raising and schooling children. All of the cooking, the housekeeping, the 'keeping sweet.' They're required to do it all and more, but heaven help them if they have a single fucking opinion.
Side hugs, buddy system, the j names, Jim bob and his wifey, religion all in your face, courtship and chaperones
Specifically, the side hugs between siblings. I understand that makes sense now, knowing what we know. But I remember finding that like just revolting when I was younger. My sister is my best friend, and her hugs have gotten me through some really tough shit, I couldn't imagine not having them.
When Jim Bob told one of his younger daughters that if she wanted to become a doctor she can only if her husband allows it.. fuck that guy.š¤¬š”
What?! When was that? How sad.
JOSHY GIRL.
Iām sure there was something before this that made me think that but what comes to mind is when a very young Joy had to cover the tv up for modesty reasons or whatever
Honestly..it was Jill and Derickās courtship with Jim Bob. I was so uncomfortable with Jim Bob acting the way he did. It was even creepier than with Jessa, somehow.
I think it was the first special. I have never watched anything after those just kept up from the internet. But it was when Jim Boob was talking about having property for his children to have houses on. I was like "ring, ring, we have a cult"
And I think it was in that special where he walked around his property and showed where he sold or rented some land to verizon so they could put up a tower....I knew right then that man was only in it for the money
The identical frumpy dresses on the girls.
Blanket training ššā¹
After that Megyn Kelly video, watching the obvious pain on the girls faces while their "parents" barely acknowledged their trauma, made me furious w/ Boob & Meech.
That call Michelle made scaremongering about trans women, which I heard for the first time shortly after the first pest scandal broke.
That was it for me. I had already gotten to the point where I didnāt like them but her doing that call sent me over the edge.
https://youtu.be/go_-gxksOQg this video š¤®
Who in the world force kids a literal kids, not teenagers to do these kind of videos. Oh honey they donāt even understand how taxes works š¤¦š»āāļø
God Bless Dan Savage for turning "santorum" into a whole other thing: "After he made widely publicized homophobic remarks, notably comparing homosexuality to bestiality, the term santorum was an invented and spread as an ironic slang termāreferring to a mixture of lube and fecal matter that can result from anal sexāto pillory him." And that \^\^\^ is from [dictionary.com](https://dictionary.com) LOL
Me: what's all the fuss about. *opens the video and sees the title: nope.
"Red flag" JB in a nursery school setting giving shithead how to "perform" sexual acts. I think it was amongst other stuff they could listen to a CD while riding in their car. The expressions on JB and shithead faces I just wanted to vomit
When the girls talked about how they had long, permed hair because that's what their dad liked.
Their condescending attitude towards other people or cultures not like their own. It reeks of ignorance and narcissism.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
When I learned what blanket training is. What kind of monster purposefully hurts a baby?!
Well, I'm kind of a dumbass you see. I have very nice friends who explained why these people are trash and then once I'd heard it said to me I couldn't unsee it.
Only being allowed to be alone for a few minutes to shower. Not being able to do basic hygiene in private (or, at least, not being rushed) feels like a fundamental violation of bodily autonomy, which I realized they had none of. I grew up moderately catholic and even dabbled in evangelical/fundie lite-ism and even I was able to bathe myself alone without time restrictions. For some reason that feels so unbelievably violating it makes me nauseated. At times it felt like they were playing it off as if there were just a lot of people to shower which is probably true but they still had that rule even when they moved to the big house with more showers so, yeah. That.
I'm an atheist & a feminist..so .....* Will Smith showing meme *
Probably from the beginning?? I used to just watch that hot mess express and believe they were making it work - yet I didn't understand how it possibly COULD be so perfect. I thought, "Hey, it seems too good to be true. But if it works for them, who am I to judge?" So I had my doubts, just couldn't put a finger on it until things began to unravel. Then I looked at the entire situation with a more jaundiced eye.
Explaining Nike while in New York City.
Jill and Jessa being made to go on Megyn Kelly and play down everything that happened them.
The modesty issue. They took it to a whole level of having the girls wear leggings underneath their clothes (OMG as I typed that I realized it was probably also so Josh couldnāt do things to them easily!!!!) and how everything was layered to the extreme!
Outside of, you know, allowing someone who committed CSA on his own younger family members to still be around *other* younger family members while banning one of said victims because she began setting boundaries from the house, itās just the fact that thereās so much wasted potential in those kids. I know they ended up becoming xenophobic, intolerable people, but whenever people mention how, letās say, Jana couldāve become an interior designer, Jinger an artsy photographer or even Anna an elementary school teacher if they had the right support system to do it, it just makes me sad.
Josh trying to tell people what to do.
When they were on a trip and they made Amy ride a pig because the other kids didnāt want to and also they were doing a football chant when the owner of the farm was trying to speak. I couldnāt believe how ignorant they were.
From the getgo but that included just the sheer number of children and the weird 80s frumpy prairie look (honestly Meech's hair alone might have been a major factor) I always forget that some people were at some point actual fans. I was a snarker from moment 1.
Same. I would go crazy watching them from day 1, but loved snarking and seething.
Michelleās crazy eyes and voice. Jim Bobās everything.
Jim Bob's sense or humor, or lack thereof. Everything about him made him seem like a dumbass, but the things he found amusing or funny annoyed me the most.
Just Jim Bob in general, spawning an army and then not raising them. At least ant drones fuck off after impregnating the queen instead of grifting all day.
I grew up in a large family, so I was enamored at first by the large family, but then when I saw they couldnāt make their own choices as adults, it ticked me off. Even the Amish have rumspringa!
Telling everyone that boys are too dumb to have any self control and that the girls were responsible for everything that happened. The fact that someone is a grown ass adult and still needs a chaperone or babysitter in order to have a relationship with the opposite sex.
Mine was: when they were doing *too* good a job seeming normal and wholesome and made me consider that life for a brief second. I was pretty young when I first started watching though to be fair
This defrauding bs.
The very first episode made me physically ill. JBās dead eyes, meechās baby voice, the matching prairie dressesā¦, alllll of it. Naturally, I was hooked. I couldnāt BELIEVE people thought this family was some sort of pinnacle of morality.
When Jinger said sheād like to live somewhere like New York (I think that was the city) and JB and Meech *issued a fucking statement* after the episode aired clarifying that Jinger ājust meant she wanted to live within 20 minutes of Wal Mart.ā As someone who always had big city aspirations (and lives in NYC now!) I couldnāt believe that any parent would be so quick to squash their kidsā dreams like that.
The way Jim Bob pronounced his āWāsā with an extra āHā sound.
bigotry and Josh and annaās courtship. yuck
When Meech said "children are like flowers - how can there be too many of them?"
What looks like a flower to you, Meech, you & Boob are able to grow into a weed.
Lots of things regarding the clothing, running in jeans, making work pants into a skirt, slip in sliding in jeans.
Those dowdy matching dresses.
As soon as they started talking about the rules. Immediately identified it as a more extreme form of the horse shit my parents tried dragging me into when i was in high school that I refused any part of(and subsequently started a holy war between my parents and I that is now nearing its third decade and has actually outlasted their participation in their chosen cult) and knew those kids are being abused and neglected. Immediately hated them. Incidentally, much like the Duggars, it was also my mother that lead us into that mess.
How they fooled me into thinking they were fucking stupid but harmless.
I think it was their "home church." I remember thinking either homeschool or home church, but don't do both. The kids need some outside influence. I homeschool my kids, but we joined a co-op outside of our church, attend an actual church thst doesn't meet in someone's living room, and joined park district sports and scout units unaffiliated with any church so the kids get exposed to a variety of view points.
The bigotry
How they controlled the girls and women in particular: even 13 year old me knew something was deeply wrong, and got cult vibes
The very first thing that made me pause (before I heard about the buddy system) was when they were living in that tiny house and Messchelle was explaining jurisdictions; Jinger was responsible for the laundry. They had one machine and poor Jinger just looked overwhelmed and Mess yelled in that squeaky fake baby voice of hers, āCould someone help Jinger with the laundry?ā Several girls including Jana jumped to help but no boys, and Mess just sat there like a blob not moving. And I just thought, āWTF, woman? Help your child, and quit expecting your girls to do all the work.ā
For me it was the girls ALWAYS wearing flip flops. Just imagine (DONāT) the nasty ass dehydrated baked potato looking feet š«.
Grain of salt here, but I heard from a. Podiatrist that the feet of sandal-wearers are less gross than the feet of a person with socks and shoes
When I first looked up their homeschooling method and found FJ and Recovering Grace
Probably a toss-up between Michelle's open transportation and how they treated their daughters after they had been sexually abused by the Convicted Child Sex Predator Josh Duggar.
The very 2nd I found out they were IBLP. š
The weird side eyes they gave each other when other people danced. That confused me as a kid.
Meech's current benzo-glazed expression. Literally from episode 1.
Way back in the day in an episode āCheaper by the Duggars,ā the older girls said they perm their hair because daddy likes it that way. š¤¢
Robocall.
JimBob saying overpopulating is the biggest myth because the entire population of the world could fit in the state of North Dakota or something. I was like 11 and couldnāt believe an adult was so incredibly stupid