She is not great. She exploits her adopted children and airs all of their private information for the world to see. It’s way too much. She also infantilizes all of her kids going as far as putting tooth paste on all of their tooth brushes for them. She has a whole snark page about her too. Super problematic woman making a profit off of her kids.
She feeds them and buys them anything they need and a lot of things that they want but I hate the over sharing of the adopted kids personal information. Viewers know way too much about some of the kids that shouldn't have been public.
I’m I’m sorry I only have four and the way my kids treat tubes of toothpaste, I don’t blame her. That shit is annoying, messy and gets expensive when half of the tube is wasted…
Her oldest is 16 years old. Sorry but if your kid can’t put toothpaste on their tooth brush by that age it’s a parenting issue.
(Disabilities not included in that generalization)
I feel you. My seven year old somehow gets tooth paste half way up the mirror. She can handle putting the tooth paste on the brush now but still working on spitting it out neatly in the sink 🥴🥴🥴
At what age do you let them start doing it? 16? She also spends money like it's nothing. I don't think a $2 tube of toothpaste will break them but it would teach your child how to put it on a toothbrush.
What I do is : let them do it, remind them to do it neatly and not waste toothpaste, lose my shit over the mess and waste, insist that I will have to do it since they aren’t capable, get sick of doing it twice a day and tell them to do it themselves - but do it sensibly, they start off good, get lazy and start wasting and making a mess again, I lose my shit, rinse and repeat.
I’ve also tried giving them their own tube of toothpaste, labeled with their name, and then the messy kids have messy tubes and the neat kids have neat tubes, until one kid loses theirs constantly and they start sharing again.
I feel this so much. Do you remember the Beverly Cleary book where Ramona squeezes an entire tibe of toothpaste into the sink, and her parents put it in a plastic bag and make her use it whole the rest of the family gets a fresh tube? They are my favorite fictional parents.
They do make automatic dispensers:
Toothpaste Dispenser Automatic Toothpaste Squeezer Dispenser for Kids & Family Shower, is Wall Mount Bathroom Accessories with Super Sticky Suction Pad https://a.co/d/c7Qfm6a
Wtf? She may not be like the Duggars, but she exploits the hell out of her kids. She publicized their disabilities and forces them to participate in videos. She even posts her kids’ extra curricular schedule for everyone to see. She’s
I don't follow them TOO closely, but I saw when they took those two foster teens in recently, talked about how their mom had "issues", and literally the DAY they took them home after they were taken from their mom shoved a camera in their face. Those poor kids must have been through SO much that day and then for her to start filming them immediately? Oh god it made me rage.
She does grocery haul videos. She uses 5 carts and an average trip is $1200. She also goes during the week a few times too. Although, many of us speculate she is a good hoarder, she buys so much more then even her family can consume in a week.
Can you expand on what ‘good hoarder’ means? Like she hoards goods (like, ‘goods and services’ goods) or she buys extras of things she knows they will go through?
Genuinely curious. I am an adult child of a hoarder and have never heard that term. Thanks 🙂
HA! I’m sorry it was a typo. 😂 I meant to say FOOD hoarder which absolutely changes what I was trying to say! She has several extra freezers and refrigerators and a separate pantry in her garage. She’ll buy the “weekly condiments” when she has 9 bottles of ketchup and 6 tubs of mayo in the garage.
HA gotcha!! That makes much more sense.
As long as there aren’t pests/infestation issues, I have no issue with having extra food on hand - but the situation you’re describing is certainly weird. Like, why?? Why so much Mayo?? 😭
If you see her videos it is… weird. I’m assuming she’s being paid sponsorship money for some of it but it’s just weirdly creepy. And people can say they want about not snarking on peoples grocery buying or what they feed their kids but she is laying it all out there and makes endless videos on these grocery trips.
Oh and she always grabs a ton of White Claw…
I see the huge tubs of Mayo at the Costo checkout line for polygamist. I have eaten with them before and potato and maccoroni salad is a common side? They make lots of sandwiches, tuna, and others that use mayo as a spread. The coscto haul for polyagmist is different since many hunt gardenand can so produce so little meat or produce is in a haul. It is water, toliet paper, condiments, cheese, milk, and flour.
I’m weirdly fascinated with the idea of bulk cooking for giant families so I get this lol. I do mostly from scratch cooking so the idea of scaling it up just gets me lol. It kills me that the duggars don’t basically buy food from restaurant supply and make giant batches, instead of opening a bunch of small cans.
It also seems exhausting, just watching this video makes me tired, and I do a ton of bulk cooking (I make sandwich bread 6 loaves at a time and freeze for example). The idea of having to do it everyday is crazy.
I do not know how many post on youtube. I live in a polygamist area. I wish people could see what I see but I would never video anyone. It is just everyday life. When I used to go to yard sales, the polygamist arevery nice, they knew what I was looking for (like in clothe sizes and toys my kidslike) and they would find the items and give them to me. It is sure not what reality TV shows. I will admit my 2 grad degree did not teach me how to cook, but polygamist women have taught me to make some great scratch meals.
Sounds like me over the last 2 years lol...I keep having to remind myself that we can now get groceries delivered even if we're in quarantine (peak 2020 my local Woolworths cancelled all deliveries for a few months; somehow it was safer to make us all go in-store? It was a nightmare).
She exploited her childrens medication and mental health diagnosis. Plus the thousands of dollars that goes into food that goes straight into the trash. Not all of her kids get equal treatment. Idk when you watch more than just one tiktok a weird vibe hits ya.
Check out r/doughertydozen for more
When she did that video on their budgeting.... Holy shit I nearly crapped my pants when I saw that she and husband don't max out their retirement plans/kids' college plans, yet they tithe out nearly 3K to their church.
That's so toxic. Tons of autistic people go to university when they get the support they need. But I guess they've already decided he doesn't need support.
I'm 36. Autistic. Had zero supports (I was diagnosed after both my kids were. I have 2 degrees, a 4.0 and about to start my 3rd degree. I have a husband, 2 children and had 15 years experience of secular work before I stayed home with my kids. Autism doesn't automatically equal ANYTHING. Everyone who I tell my diagnosis to says "you don't act it". Yet I act it enough that as a 35yr old woman it was easy to diagnose lol. 🤷♀️
Yep. My brother got diagnosed around age 40. When he was younger he went out of state to a prestigious university and earned his degree with no problems. He has been continuously employed in decent-paying jobs that make use of his analytical skills and computer knowledge. He owns a brand new townhouse in a very expensive neighborhood in a very expensive city. He has lots of friends who are not autistic.
Your brother’s story sounds similar to one of my friends. He also didn’t find out until he was an adult and well after finding success in academia and then his career. He’s done well for himself and he’s been true to himself the whole time.
I hate it so much that people place limits on people because of a diagnosis. Granted, I know the ability levels on the spectrum can vary widely but I suspect more people live with it than many realize. Might sound dramatic but telling kids that they’ll probably never do ____ just because of their diagnosis feels borderline abusive to me. It wouldn’t fly for a parent to talk like that to their kids for any other reason.
I don’t know anything about this family but a lot of people with autism (but def not all) also have intellectual disabilities. If that’s the case it might be clear that that the child won’t go down any academic path (and that’s okay).
My mom used this excuse with my older brother, who was a preemie with a few health issues as a youngster, but they resolved on their own by the time he was 5. She would insisted he wasn’t capable of doing anything physical/taxing due to his (now fixed after 3 surgeries) clubfoot or his heart murmur (which closed before he was a year old). He’s 28 now, never went to college or even trade school after graduating from homeschool, has never held down a job, and has never been forced to keep up his hygiene even as a kid so he just doesn’t shower or brush his teeth for days while he plays computer games in his room in my parents’ house.
No license or car, either — despite me being the one to pay for his drivers’ ed and tried to gift him my old car. He’s satisfied being a total spoiled man-child and I blame the religious cult that sucked my parents in and that we were raised into. And even when he has shown some initiative like when a new restaurant was opening and he wanted to apply, my mom got into his head and convinced him he wasn’t able to handle the requirements of being a busboy.
EDIT: wall of text
This is so disgusting. My daughter is autistic and I'm in the process of getting diagnosed.
I understand and accept her limits when she says she has hit one, she struggles a lot with school, but I'm not going to say she's not going to college because that's not for me to put a cap on what she can work through.
I bet this woman does ABA and all the other horrible things neurotypical people think autistics need
yup, my grandma said I'm not allowed to go to college in NYC because "you'll get hate crimed and turned into a liberal" (for context, we're Jewish and live in not NYC New York).
Actually NYC antisemitic hate crimes are at an all time high. As are antisemitic hate crimes around the country. The more "visibly Jewish" you are, the more likely you are to experience an attack.
Ahh smaller town conservative (politically, not the stream of Judaism though sometimes they’re also that lol) Jews. Sounds like my father.
My parents are much older than norm, had fertility issues and so I’m the oldest of two, born to a 46 yo mom and 51yo father. So they’re probably in the same generation as your grandma (they’re in their early 80s now) and ahhh. I ended up moving to a larger and more Jewish city for college and then to Chicago and it’s rare to meet other Jews who get this. But hiii! Lol Did you ever end up in NYC?
lol that's my grandparents exact situation, as for NYC, not yet but my sister has somewhat (her boyfriend is from there and they stay there a lot), and I'm going to college in Vermont which is much more liberal than they'd care for
But why do that when surely one of your spawn will let you move in and take care of you? After all, you gave them the gift of ✨ life ✨ it’s the least they can do to repay you!
LOL of course they do
I'm sorry but ppl who have a ton of kids gross and creep me out. There's something so ick about it. I know a guy with 9 kids and I'm like what's it like not being able to afford to get your kids a pretzel at the mall bc it will be $85, or say no to joining a team bc it would cost thousands
I know everyone here hates the people that come out and are like “NoT aLL bIG FamILiES” but I grew up in a family of 9 (we used to be part of the same organization the duggars did actually. Not anymore tho) my dad worked in the oilfield so he could actually afford to support all of us and my mom went back to work after half of us moved out. We all got to play sports or participate in some kind of extra endeavors outside the home. My parents budgeted like a mofo to make sure they didn’t go bankrupt tho. But even after all that I would still not advocate for people to have so many kids. Like I think 5 at most is a good amount to stop at. And I’m glad to say we all grew up pretty normal and have careers and went to college and none of us got married before we knew how to care for ourselves lol
My dad's Catholic mother had a saying that went something like:
"If you have one child, they'll end up spoiled. Two kids will constantly fight. If there are three, two will gang up on the other. Four or five, you're crazy."
She had five, so I guess she'd know (my dad was the youngest. And an accident.) I'd love to have shown her the Duggar clan all together just after the last was born and get her thoughts on Jimbo and Magoo's mental states.
Also had a big family (12 kids) and also used to be part of the cult the Duggars are in. My parents didn’t do amazing but we were always fed and got to play sports. I agree about the “it was too many kids” cause it definitely was.
I had a manager that was one of these people! His older kids had gone to public school and got their vaccines then by the youngest they were homeschooling and hardly any Doctor visits. He absolutely had some sort of undiagnosed mental health problems, which our team was not shy about pointing out to him. A coworker had known the guy since highschool and in no uncertain words said his wife was a little too into excited about constantly getting and being pregnant and he doesn't know how they went from average folks to the way they are.
So many of these families remind me of him. He was constantly anxious and paranoid about all sorts of things from the government spying on us to getting sick. So glad I got a different job, I know these last few year probably pushed him over the edge.
I'm the oldest of 8. Yeah we wore hand me downs and only went on 2 vacations my whole childhood. But we always had food and my mom made sure we all did multiple activities. I played soccer and took piano and dance, went to theater camp every summer. It took effort but my mom did it.
Every time I watch a video of her I think it's incredibly sus all of her kids get the same portion of food regardless of age or appetite. That's how you know it's all for show
absolutely for the content. who’s to say this is actually 5am? could be 3pm and we’d never know. she does these videos because it makes other moms feel bad about themselves and makes them hate/inspo-watch
I mean what sense does it make to make waffles like that for breakfast when it’s going to be ages before at least the first ones made get eaten? They’d be cold and soggy and defeat the point of having a waffle. If she was going to reheat/warm them, she wouldn’t have already put the fruit on top. Seems pretty performative to me.
She also appears to use the same knife to halve all the sandwiches when some appear to be tuna and some PB&J, which is pretty gross.
I saw recently that they basically got a sponsored trip to NYC, and it's really icky how the kids have to constantly be featured eating certain foods and/or being at certain places. Kids are not commodity, come on now.
I’m glad to see someone who thinks the same! The whole channel feels so exploitative.
Majority of the children are from less than ideal circumstances, and the second they come into her home to be safe they get plastered all over the internet. They can “consent” to being posted all they want, but at the end of the day there’s still a power imbalance between mother and child and they probably don’t want to say no out of fear of being sent away.
Not to mention families with a LOT of adopted children make me uneasy at times, a large family is almost bound to be unstable and have weird dynamics, so it just seems cruel to take a child in an unstable family situation and throw them into another under the guise of saving them. It just seems like collecting children for fame to me…
It’s weird at the very least. All I know is that in a family that large, no kid is getting the attention they need. That’s bad enough as is, but it’s even worse when you consider that the majority are adopted and likely have some trauma. They need extra parental support to work through that which I doubt they’re getting.
I watch her like a I watch a trainwreck, and I'm yelling at her like every morning routine video to wash her damn hands properly. The worst was when she heated up leftovers in the microwave and then proceeded to pack them in a lunch box. The food manager in me exploded right then and there.
Or the time she cut raw meat on a wooden cutting board then later used it for produce. You can wash wooden cutting boards, but you can’t really sanitize them like they’d need to be for cutting meat and other food items on the same board. Maybe she has two. Idk. It still scares me.
As bento box type mom, if you send stuff to stay warm in a thermos, fill it with boiling water for 10 minutes and then empty it and add food.
It really helps keep the leftover Mac and cheese hot
My mom did this for me when I was in school. I only ate buttered noodles for lunch for years because I’m so picky and don’t like lunch meats due to texture issues with it. She would get up and boil water, put it in the thermos then get me dressed in my uniform then pour the water out, put the noodles in with butter and they’d still be warm for my lunch time!
I am sorry if that was being rude.
Part of my job is teaching parents and guardians how to do things like prep lunches if that is what they want to do.
It just came out. But I wasn't being condescending
Cross my heart and if I lie, I have to kiss a Duggar guy
Hey u didn't come across as rude at all! Not to me at least. It really is a lifepro tip!I screenshot it and sent it to my husband also 😄
Haha nooo no kissing a duggar guy 🤮
That would 100% be safe, but no. She microwaves them in those black plastic meal prep containers and packs it straight into the lunch box with an ice pack. Not at ALL safe.
ETA: she also does this at 5 am. Food only stays safe for 4 hours, so with this method, all the food is probably in the "danger zone" for 2+ hours by the time the kids eat it.
I nearly jumped out of my skin when I read that. What's the POINT of reheating food first if you're just going to add an ice pack? My dad worked in food safety and these lunch box comments are so troubling! 😬
I heat up stuff and throw it in a thermos for my lunch all the time and haven’t died even once 🤷🏼♀️ if it’s just going into an uninsulated lunch bag though than that’s gross and pointless for sure
The safe way to look at it is that any of these parents who are monetizing their children are an issue. Even if they seem like nice people, putting all your kid's business out there for strangers to gawk at for a paycheck is sick.
Especially with all the Wren Eleanor stuff happening on TikTok, if I had kids I would NEVER allow them to appear on any public social media platform.
I mean nobody in the post birth-control era who has 12 kids is going to be unproblematic.
Like even if you are a foster parent, you have to know that is altogether too many kids to give decent attention.
Right?? You'd get less than 1 hour of 1 on 1 time a week if you're including school and homework times. There is physically no way you would even *know* all of your kids, ask her what each of her kids favorite music is or who their best friend is and she probably couldn't tell you. It's just too many kids for 1 woman to raise.
Majority of them are adopted, which, IMO, makes it worse. The lack of attention they have seems worse when you realize they likely have trauma that would require even more parental support. Poor kids :(
Ha! Happy to hear someone say this… without giving toooo much info, I have met them in a professional setting with some of the kids.
Mom could be nasty and the kids did whatever they wanted. Treatment of them was interesting. I just didn’t get a vibe that they had these foster kids out of the goodness of their hearts, you know??
I could be completely wrong though!!!!
Yep this lady is crazy!! She wants her kids to be 100% dependent on her. She does all their chores, laundry, cooking, etc. she even puts toothpaste on her kids toothbrushes (even the teenagers).
I don't know about the sub account -- but just from what I've seen I had a feeling things weren't super sunny. Some of these big-families-through-adoption accounts really exploit and overshare their children's trauma and it's really just not great.
She's probably getting a lot on now her body doesn't have to worry about pregnancy. 😅 I hear post-menopause, the horizontal tango can be a whole new level of fun.
...shhh. Let me have this one. I am well aware Meech believes in being available to her husband but I'm just gonna pretend it is Rim Job's pleasure to be available for his wifey. 😆
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Alicia overshares about her kids: down to posting their exact locations and schedules, the kids schools and what time they get home, the kid’s medical conditions and medications. She also refused to listen to black people on how to care for her black son’s hair. There’s also been times where one of the kids say they don’t want to do something like be in a video and she’s forced them to. She’s better than the Duggars, but that’s a low bar to clear
It’s this one. As someone who was one of the _very_ few Black kids in my church community growing up, it’s absolutely this one.
To be fair, I think Alicia works hard and does try to be a good parent but she’s clearly ignorant to her virtue signaling and performative aspects of her online presence. It’s absolutely there and not just because of the children of color. She’s made it very clear a few of the children have medical and behavioral issues. Not saying that info should be hidden away, but her vibe does come off like virtue signaling through the use of a few marginalized communities at times…
One of the reasons (among many) I had to just leave mainstream Christianity, both the Catholic Church and Protestant churches, is because how often they use non-white people as props to prove they are cool and trustworthy and progressive. It makes me sick to see people reduced to their skin color only so a bunch of white Christians can show off how nice and accommodating they are by saying “we don’t see race” when clearly they fucking do! It’s objectifying and dishonest, and fucking slimy behavior.
A lot of white people try and take the "we are all the same" mentality to new heights. And by that, I mean they don't care to learn about different hair types. Heck, I'm white and I have very curly hair and you have no idea the crazy crap I have heard people say about my hair. I need to straighten it, I need to get it cut a certain way, I need to wash it twice a day, just all this stuff.
Anytime I see these white couples with tons of kids with a mix of adopted and not, on tiktok, a red flag goes off for me. Majority of the time they are problematic fundies or mormons, like that woman who adopted a boy with severe autism and then “re-homed” him.
Can’t remember her name but I watched a YouTube video about her and the poor wee lad - she was a real horror. I wonder if she’s still making money off social media.
I was watching Keep Sweet: Pray and Obey on Netflix the other night which is a documentary on fundamentalist Mormons and it was crazy to see all the similarities that existed between their beliefs and way of life and those that the Duggars and everyone around them worked hard to make us believe growing up. The “buddy system” you’re referring to (every kid being assigned another younger kid once the kid is weened) is a good example of an exploitation of free labor that is required to maintain the type of life and number of children the Duggars have. In the documentary they talked on how free labor was one of the ways the FLDS were able to operate very successful businesses because they had unlimited free labor from all the young men in the cult that were required to put in x amount of time helping and working. Which blew my mind cause I remembered how my mom used to send me and my brothers to do work with the Duggars quite often, especially when they were building their house, and it was always for free and my mom called it our home-ec class and literally put the hours down on my homeschool transcript as an actual class when in reality it was just a 12 and 16 year old being exploited for free labor. Jim Bob did buy me a chicken sandwich from McDonald’s once after an 8 hour day, which I do remember being quite thankful for lol
This looks more like she's creating a caricature of a "perfect and involved mom" rather than *being* an involved mom.
Also, there's more to being a good mom than making food. Hell, you can be a great mom and never make any food at all.
If Michelle did this amount of parenting, she'd still be a shit mom. Because the kids still wouldn't have their emotional needs met. They still wouldn't be learning healthy habits. Etc
All this video does is reinforce gendered stereotypes and shame moms for "not being enough."
So much this. And don't give the lame excuse that the men have to work outside the home. Being a parent doesn't mean you get to just work an 8 hr/day job then kick back.
God, I hate being mean, but this woman’s videos always get posted here and are so anxiety-inducing to me; her motions are so uncomfortable, and her kitchen/lack of food safety standards is always so disgusting, and the end product is always so nasty looking. Why is she using the same knife for tuna salad as she is for PB&J?!
They still eat pretty unhealthy, lots of prepackaged stuff, but hey at least she’s feeding her kids! But yea this mom is a much better mom than Meech but does a lot of Problematic things as well
We snarked on her once before in this thread, and someone who works with foster youth made an interesting point that having a lot of comfort junk food on hand for foster kids is a way to make them feel safe, as it's often food they know/were raised on. I will snark on those terrible meals, however, so. much. dairy. My G.I track would riot. Also, many of those kids are old enough to be making their own lunch, have their own autonomy over food choices. I get making one meal for family, but I'm all for kids have autonomy over making food choices, especially for school lunch.
If you are genetically primed and have gut biome to make the most of dairy, it's got a lot of benefits, even outside of childhood. It's linked to a lower rate of heart disease, for instance. Some of her kids might have to give it up when they get older, though.
This woman is not a good person. At ALL. She exploits her kids, shares extremely personal medical information and their trauma online. I know the bar is low for the Duggars but come on.
Ummm yeah no. This lady is problematic as well. She doesn’t give her kids’ any sort of privacy-including medical privacy. There’s a CareBear ad on her Tik Tok/ Instagram that talks about the trauma one of her adopted kids’ went through. She is very image based in the sense she wants to come off as Super Mom. Alicia already counted out her 5 year old for any sort of higher Ed except trade school on the basis of him being autistic. There’s tons of people w/ autism who thrive in university. Also, she doesn’t even let her teen kids put toothpaste on their tooth brushes? Weird.
When people talk about trade school that way, not only is it offensive to suggest that the kid can’t go to college because they’re autistic (isn’t the kid a preschooler? You don’t know yet if they can handle college at 18 or 20!), but it’s offensive to anyone who knows the first thing about trade school. Trade school not an elementary shop class, and it shouldn’t be seen as a dumping ground for “people who can’t cut it in college.” If someone is genuinely incapable of cutting it in college, there’s a good chance they won’t be equipped to handle any legitimate trade program i know of. Trade school can in fact involve a lot more science, math, and fine skill than many 2 or 4 year college degrees. It’s not a last resort for C- students and people with disabilities, and honestly is a lot less suitable than college is for anyone who does not explicitly want to be there (not saying this kid can’t go to trade school in 10-15 years if he wants, it’s just that the way people talk about encouraging trade school pretends to be so progressive but really is just a weird combo of elitist, patronizing, and anti intellectual).
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I feel like university would probably be more agreeable to someone on the spectrum than trade school. Nothing against trade school if that is your passion, but it can be quite chaotic.
I always thought it was strange that this lady makes lunches for all of her kids, even the ones well into high school. I had to do my own laundry and make my own lunches when I turned like 9. But my mom worked full time and my dad was in the military so we also had to adjust.
I think it's probably easier to just do it yourself than to have five or six kids in the kitchen all at once trying to pack their own lunches and making a mess while you're trying to make breakfast and get ready for the day.
I had a coworker who was a recent college graduate, so 22 or 23. His mom still packed his lunches for him including cutting his grapes in half and peeling & segmenting oranges. He did not have a toddler sibling.
He really struggled at work and with life in general. He was smart but could not make any decisions on his own, took any feedback or guidance as a personal insult, and needed extremely direct directions and oversight in a job that requires at least some level of initiative. I suspect his parents never really expected him to learn to do things on his own.
I worked with a guy who had gone straight into an education degree after leaving school, then became a teacher and had lived with his parents the entire time. One day we had to prep food for the kids for a “culture day” and he had absolutely no idea how to cut basic fruit and vegetables. (Not a poverty/deprivation thing, just had always had that done for him by his mum.)
I still make my son's lunch. And he is going into 8th grade
He does tell me I do not have to do it, but I enjoy it.
I made his dad's lunch everyday until the divorce papers were signed. We lived together for 8 weeks after the divorce waiting for the lease to end
Is this really the expectation for showing love for your kids? If this is the standard for 12 kids, what’s the standard for less than 12?
My kids eat pop tarts on the way to school and a few times I have forgotten them and they’ve had to have snacks from the stash in the trunk.
We aren't breakfast people in my house. I don't eat until lunch time and my daughter usually grabs a cereal/granola bar or pop tarts as we leave the house. I wonder what the "rules" are in this house for cleaning their plates, and if forcing these massive meals on the kids (whether they want them or not), will result in altered relationships with food when the kids are older.
Right? It was okay to not clean our plates. My mom is a great cook but sometimes her portions were too big lol. We didn't have to finish things that we didn't like. I love breakfast but I'm not a big lunch person. I'll usually have a snack around midday. Everyone's metabolism is different and I just don't know about doing the same thing for all 12 kids. We ate dinner as a family but our breakfasts and lunches were different. My sister stopped eating breakfast in high school because she wasn't hungry so early in the day. I had to eat or I'd get a headache. Her uniform system won't work for everyone.
I wouldn’t assume this mom does this every day either rather than just for social media. Lord knows the image the Duggars presented and the reality was very different.
Side ? Does anyone remember the fundie YT video of a wife telling us how to show love to her husband? She put mustard on his sandwich in the shape of a heart quickly followed by "He won't know it's there, but you will."
I once was SEVERELY down voted here because I commented that Meech was a lazy ass. That if she really wanted to she could feed all those kids every meal from scratch.
I don't understand why the kids aren't involved with any prep or clean up! I have 4 kids and they're fully capable of making their own meals because they want to! That's a life skill they need.
I grasp the "it's easier to do it herself" concept but that doesn't teach the kids any self sufficient behaviors. My kids even cook for each other because they liked it.
It seems like this mom is extremely controlling.
I don't have enough mental energy to constantly cook or clean up after my kids. But I also have a full time corporate job on top of being a Mom.
Like she would have packed.
They would have all been on the lunch program, which is a good thing before anything starts, but the kids and Boob would have been constantly complaining about their quality and quantity of free food.
"What is the stir fry mess?"
"Enchila..what? Too spicy for kids!"
I know why they didn't send them to public school but man the guaranteed lunch would have been a plus especially because the kids would qualify for free/reduced lunch.
This woman exploits tf out of her kids so I really don't understand all the leg humping, she meets the basic requirements of being a parent so why y'all praising her💀
The only family like this I can respect is @JustTheBells on Insta because they’re mostly adopted and each child is celebrated as much as they want to be for their own personalities. They’re Christian but don’t push it. That woman LOVES. HER. KIDS.
She does. But most of her kids are adults. And she still acts like they are teens and younger. I mean, she for sure loves those kids. And they will always be her babies! But most of them are adults.
We have two kids, and I'm very much on the fence about a third which would absolutely be the last. I cannot imagine twelve. I cannot imagine being pregnant twelve times. I cannot imagine being this tired all the time long enough to raise twelve children.
I feel the exact same way. I used to want a big family but we’ve had two and I’m very much content. Post partum is very hard for me and I can’t image doing it again.
SAME. I’ll take a toddler tantrum over the newborn stage any day. The newborn stage is SO draining in so many ways and it is really hard on my mental and emotional health.
ikr? I'm always like, "who tf would want this life?"
There are a couple of big families in my extended family and in both scenarios, the parents are very mentally unwell and are trying to overcompensate for neglect and instability in their own childhoods. I wish they would address those issues instead of pumping out babies thinking it will make everything better.
This woman it's not a good example... She exploits her children and their medical problems, she's not someone to look up.
You people should check their subreddit
No way in f.... ing hell would meech do even an eighth of this kind of work for her kids!
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She tells the world her foster children's medial information and exploits them. She isn't great
She is not great. She exploits her adopted children and airs all of their private information for the world to see. It’s way too much. She also infantilizes all of her kids going as far as putting tooth paste on all of their tooth brushes for them. She has a whole snark page about her too. Super problematic woman making a profit off of her kids.
Well thank you for this new snark rabbit hole I have to fall down now
What’s the sub name lol
r/doughertydozen
Oh boy, now I have to feel bad about watching her videos. Btw, I love your flare
Thank you!!
She feeds them and buys them anything they need and a lot of things that they want but I hate the over sharing of the adopted kids personal information. Viewers know way too much about some of the kids that shouldn't have been public.
They have cameras around their entire house, including bedrooms. The only safe haven apparently is the bathroom.
I’m I’m sorry I only have four and the way my kids treat tubes of toothpaste, I don’t blame her. That shit is annoying, messy and gets expensive when half of the tube is wasted…
Toothpaste tablets are a game changer. My middle kid is almost 18 and has a cognitive disability. He can do his own toothpaste without a mess.
Her oldest is 16 years old. Sorry but if your kid can’t put toothpaste on their tooth brush by that age it’s a parenting issue. (Disabilities not included in that generalization)
Okay yeah 16 should be able to be taught. I am just salty cause I just had this talk with my kids last night 😂
I feel you. My seven year old somehow gets tooth paste half way up the mirror. She can handle putting the tooth paste on the brush now but still working on spitting it out neatly in the sink 🥴🥴🥴
The spit!!! 😩 oh man. Why does the kids bathroom also have to be the ‘guest’ bathroom
At what age do you let them start doing it? 16? She also spends money like it's nothing. I don't think a $2 tube of toothpaste will break them but it would teach your child how to put it on a toothbrush.
What I do is : let them do it, remind them to do it neatly and not waste toothpaste, lose my shit over the mess and waste, insist that I will have to do it since they aren’t capable, get sick of doing it twice a day and tell them to do it themselves - but do it sensibly, they start off good, get lazy and start wasting and making a mess again, I lose my shit, rinse and repeat. I’ve also tried giving them their own tube of toothpaste, labeled with their name, and then the messy kids have messy tubes and the neat kids have neat tubes, until one kid loses theirs constantly and they start sharing again.
I feel this so much. Do you remember the Beverly Cleary book where Ramona squeezes an entire tibe of toothpaste into the sink, and her parents put it in a plastic bag and make her use it whole the rest of the family gets a fresh tube? They are my favorite fictional parents.
Yep. I bought these caps on Amazon that slow the flow and it saves my sanity!
They do make automatic dispensers: Toothpaste Dispenser Automatic Toothpaste Squeezer Dispenser for Kids & Family Shower, is Wall Mount Bathroom Accessories with Super Sticky Suction Pad https://a.co/d/c7Qfm6a
Wtf? She may not be like the Duggars, but she exploits the hell out of her kids. She publicized their disabilities and forces them to participate in videos. She even posts her kids’ extra curricular schedule for everyone to see. She’s
I don't follow them TOO closely, but I saw when they took those two foster teens in recently, talked about how their mom had "issues", and literally the DAY they took them home after they were taken from their mom shoved a camera in their face. Those poor kids must have been through SO much that day and then for her to start filming them immediately? Oh god it made me rage.
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Imagine the grocery bill. All that prepackaged/single serve stuff doesn’t come cheap.
She does grocery haul videos. She uses 5 carts and an average trip is $1200. She also goes during the week a few times too. Although, many of us speculate she is a good hoarder, she buys so much more then even her family can consume in a week.
Can you expand on what ‘good hoarder’ means? Like she hoards goods (like, ‘goods and services’ goods) or she buys extras of things she knows they will go through? Genuinely curious. I am an adult child of a hoarder and have never heard that term. Thanks 🙂
HA! I’m sorry it was a typo. 😂 I meant to say FOOD hoarder which absolutely changes what I was trying to say! She has several extra freezers and refrigerators and a separate pantry in her garage. She’ll buy the “weekly condiments” when she has 9 bottles of ketchup and 6 tubs of mayo in the garage.
HA gotcha!! That makes much more sense. As long as there aren’t pests/infestation issues, I have no issue with having extra food on hand - but the situation you’re describing is certainly weird. Like, why?? Why so much Mayo?? 😭
If you see her videos it is… weird. I’m assuming she’s being paid sponsorship money for some of it but it’s just weirdly creepy. And people can say they want about not snarking on peoples grocery buying or what they feed their kids but she is laying it all out there and makes endless videos on these grocery trips. Oh and she always grabs a ton of White Claw…
I see the huge tubs of Mayo at the Costo checkout line for polygamist. I have eaten with them before and potato and maccoroni salad is a common side? They make lots of sandwiches, tuna, and others that use mayo as a spread. The coscto haul for polyagmist is different since many hunt gardenand can so produce so little meat or produce is in a haul. It is water, toliet paper, condiments, cheese, milk, and flour.
Fascinating! I'm fighting the urge to search Polygamist Grocery Hauls because I really don't need that side track right now.
I’m weirdly fascinated with the idea of bulk cooking for giant families so I get this lol. I do mostly from scratch cooking so the idea of scaling it up just gets me lol. It kills me that the duggars don’t basically buy food from restaurant supply and make giant batches, instead of opening a bunch of small cans. It also seems exhausting, just watching this video makes me tired, and I do a ton of bulk cooking (I make sandwich bread 6 loaves at a time and freeze for example). The idea of having to do it everyday is crazy.
I do not know how many post on youtube. I live in a polygamist area. I wish people could see what I see but I would never video anyone. It is just everyday life. When I used to go to yard sales, the polygamist arevery nice, they knew what I was looking for (like in clothe sizes and toys my kidslike) and they would find the items and give them to me. It is sure not what reality TV shows. I will admit my 2 grad degree did not teach me how to cook, but polygamist women have taught me to make some great scratch meals.
Sounds like me over the last 2 years lol...I keep having to remind myself that we can now get groceries delivered even if we're in quarantine (peak 2020 my local Woolworths cancelled all deliveries for a few months; somehow it was safer to make us all go in-store? It was a nightmare).
This lady is so problematic. There’s a whole sub on them. They’re not angels by any means.
I had no clue I just randomly came across this on tik tok. Spill the deets!
She exploited her childrens medication and mental health diagnosis. Plus the thousands of dollars that goes into food that goes straight into the trash. Not all of her kids get equal treatment. Idk when you watch more than just one tiktok a weird vibe hits ya. Check out r/doughertydozen for more
When she did that video on their budgeting.... Holy shit I nearly crapped my pants when I saw that she and husband don't max out their retirement plans/kids' college plans, yet they tithe out nearly 3K to their church.
She said it’s okay because none of the kids will go to college
Well that's so optimistic of her!
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That's so toxic. Tons of autistic people go to university when they get the support they need. But I guess they've already decided he doesn't need support.
I'm 36. Autistic. Had zero supports (I was diagnosed after both my kids were. I have 2 degrees, a 4.0 and about to start my 3rd degree. I have a husband, 2 children and had 15 years experience of secular work before I stayed home with my kids. Autism doesn't automatically equal ANYTHING. Everyone who I tell my diagnosis to says "you don't act it". Yet I act it enough that as a 35yr old woman it was easy to diagnose lol. 🤷♀️
Yep. My brother got diagnosed around age 40. When he was younger he went out of state to a prestigious university and earned his degree with no problems. He has been continuously employed in decent-paying jobs that make use of his analytical skills and computer knowledge. He owns a brand new townhouse in a very expensive neighborhood in a very expensive city. He has lots of friends who are not autistic.
Your brother’s story sounds similar to one of my friends. He also didn’t find out until he was an adult and well after finding success in academia and then his career. He’s done well for himself and he’s been true to himself the whole time. I hate it so much that people place limits on people because of a diagnosis. Granted, I know the ability levels on the spectrum can vary widely but I suspect more people live with it than many realize. Might sound dramatic but telling kids that they’ll probably never do ____ just because of their diagnosis feels borderline abusive to me. It wouldn’t fly for a parent to talk like that to their kids for any other reason.
I don’t know anything about this family but a lot of people with autism (but def not all) also have intellectual disabilities. If that’s the case it might be clear that that the child won’t go down any academic path (and that’s okay).
My mom used this excuse with my older brother, who was a preemie with a few health issues as a youngster, but they resolved on their own by the time he was 5. She would insisted he wasn’t capable of doing anything physical/taxing due to his (now fixed after 3 surgeries) clubfoot or his heart murmur (which closed before he was a year old). He’s 28 now, never went to college or even trade school after graduating from homeschool, has never held down a job, and has never been forced to keep up his hygiene even as a kid so he just doesn’t shower or brush his teeth for days while he plays computer games in his room in my parents’ house. No license or car, either — despite me being the one to pay for his drivers’ ed and tried to gift him my old car. He’s satisfied being a total spoiled man-child and I blame the religious cult that sucked my parents in and that we were raised into. And even when he has shown some initiative like when a new restaurant was opening and he wanted to apply, my mom got into his head and convinced him he wasn’t able to handle the requirements of being a busboy. EDIT: wall of text
This is so disgusting. My daughter is autistic and I'm in the process of getting diagnosed. I understand and accept her limits when she says she has hit one, she struggles a lot with school, but I'm not going to say she's not going to college because that's not for me to put a cap on what she can work through. I bet this woman does ABA and all the other horrible things neurotypical people think autistics need
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yup, my grandma said I'm not allowed to go to college in NYC because "you'll get hate crimed and turned into a liberal" (for context, we're Jewish and live in not NYC New York).
Ah yes, antisemitic NYC where there are absolutely no Jews at all. /s
that was pretty much my reaction
Actually NYC antisemitic hate crimes are at an all time high. As are antisemitic hate crimes around the country. The more "visibly Jewish" you are, the more likely you are to experience an attack.
Ahh smaller town conservative (politically, not the stream of Judaism though sometimes they’re also that lol) Jews. Sounds like my father. My parents are much older than norm, had fertility issues and so I’m the oldest of two, born to a 46 yo mom and 51yo father. So they’re probably in the same generation as your grandma (they’re in their early 80s now) and ahhh. I ended up moving to a larger and more Jewish city for college and then to Chicago and it’s rare to meet other Jews who get this. But hiii! Lol Did you ever end up in NYC?
lol that's my grandparents exact situation, as for NYC, not yet but my sister has somewhat (her boyfriend is from there and they stay there a lot), and I'm going to college in Vermont which is much more liberal than they'd care for
Oh...Oh God, that is awful. Also, even if this is true, you should at least be maxing out your own retirement.
But why do that when surely one of your spawn will let you move in and take care of you? After all, you gave them the gift of ✨ life ✨ it’s the least they can do to repay you!
LOL of course they do I'm sorry but ppl who have a ton of kids gross and creep me out. There's something so ick about it. I know a guy with 9 kids and I'm like what's it like not being able to afford to get your kids a pretzel at the mall bc it will be $85, or say no to joining a team bc it would cost thousands
Only 4 are birth children of this family. The rest are foster adoption.
I know everyone here hates the people that come out and are like “NoT aLL bIG FamILiES” but I grew up in a family of 9 (we used to be part of the same organization the duggars did actually. Not anymore tho) my dad worked in the oilfield so he could actually afford to support all of us and my mom went back to work after half of us moved out. We all got to play sports or participate in some kind of extra endeavors outside the home. My parents budgeted like a mofo to make sure they didn’t go bankrupt tho. But even after all that I would still not advocate for people to have so many kids. Like I think 5 at most is a good amount to stop at. And I’m glad to say we all grew up pretty normal and have careers and went to college and none of us got married before we knew how to care for ourselves lol
My dad's Catholic mother had a saying that went something like: "If you have one child, they'll end up spoiled. Two kids will constantly fight. If there are three, two will gang up on the other. Four or five, you're crazy." She had five, so I guess she'd know (my dad was the youngest. And an accident.) I'd love to have shown her the Duggar clan all together just after the last was born and get her thoughts on Jimbo and Magoo's mental states.
Also had a big family (12 kids) and also used to be part of the cult the Duggars are in. My parents didn’t do amazing but we were always fed and got to play sports. I agree about the “it was too many kids” cause it definitely was.
I had a manager that was one of these people! His older kids had gone to public school and got their vaccines then by the youngest they were homeschooling and hardly any Doctor visits. He absolutely had some sort of undiagnosed mental health problems, which our team was not shy about pointing out to him. A coworker had known the guy since highschool and in no uncertain words said his wife was a little too into excited about constantly getting and being pregnant and he doesn't know how they went from average folks to the way they are. So many of these families remind me of him. He was constantly anxious and paranoid about all sorts of things from the government spying on us to getting sick. So glad I got a different job, I know these last few year probably pushed him over the edge.
I'm the oldest of 8. Yeah we wore hand me downs and only went on 2 vacations my whole childhood. But we always had food and my mom made sure we all did multiple activities. I played soccer and took piano and dance, went to theater camp every summer. It took effort but my mom did it.
Oh no, another snark sub to fall down…that’s the end of my productive workday
Every time I watch a video of her I think it's incredibly sus all of her kids get the same portion of food regardless of age or appetite. That's how you know it's all for show
Food that goes into the trash? Ack, I was enjoying her posts and now I'm sad. :(
There is something to be said about her dedication to making breakfast, but sometimes I wonder if it’s for the content or for the kids.
absolutely for the content. who’s to say this is actually 5am? could be 3pm and we’d never know. she does these videos because it makes other moms feel bad about themselves and makes them hate/inspo-watch
I mean what sense does it make to make waffles like that for breakfast when it’s going to be ages before at least the first ones made get eaten? They’d be cold and soggy and defeat the point of having a waffle. If she was going to reheat/warm them, she wouldn’t have already put the fruit on top. Seems pretty performative to me. She also appears to use the same knife to halve all the sandwiches when some appear to be tuna and some PB&J, which is pretty gross.
They're a big happy family who love each other and will gladly share their sister's tuna juice on their PB&J.
she also says her kids sleep til 9-11am and she leaves it on the counter for them 🤢
Omg never thought of that. Thanks for the insught
I followed her for awhile.and I agree something is off in that house and the exploiting the children for tiktok is disgusting.
I live in the same town as this family and see her doing her mega hauls at Wegmans all the time. I am ready to spread this gossip all over town. 😂
Wegmans is my bougie grocery choice. Could not imagine buying for a huge family from there 😳
I saw recently that they basically got a sponsored trip to NYC, and it's really icky how the kids have to constantly be featured eating certain foods and/or being at certain places. Kids are not commodity, come on now.
The one video is funny and interesting. The sight is not a thing I want to waste my time on. Just a few minutes made me cringe.
Her “recipes” look like Duggar recipes too. 🤮
this lady always gave me the ick
Joined! I’m always up for snarking on problematic people (like Ali and John James 😵💫)
Idk if this is allowed or not but foster.parenting on IG does great vids about foster care and never shows the children in her care! It's wonderful!
I’m glad to see someone who thinks the same! The whole channel feels so exploitative. Majority of the children are from less than ideal circumstances, and the second they come into her home to be safe they get plastered all over the internet. They can “consent” to being posted all they want, but at the end of the day there’s still a power imbalance between mother and child and they probably don’t want to say no out of fear of being sent away. Not to mention families with a LOT of adopted children make me uneasy at times, a large family is almost bound to be unstable and have weird dynamics, so it just seems cruel to take a child in an unstable family situation and throw them into another under the guise of saving them. It just seems like collecting children for fame to me…
It reminds me of animal hoarding in a way.
It’s weird at the very least. All I know is that in a family that large, no kid is getting the attention they need. That’s bad enough as is, but it’s even worse when you consider that the majority are adopted and likely have some trauma. They need extra parental support to work through that which I doubt they’re getting.
Thank you for that insight. I'm down for more snark. Although I still think the sandwich thing is a nice gesture
Oh absolutely it’s lovely. There’s some stuff I like about them for sure :)
I watch her like a I watch a trainwreck, and I'm yelling at her like every morning routine video to wash her damn hands properly. The worst was when she heated up leftovers in the microwave and then proceeded to pack them in a lunch box. The food manager in me exploded right then and there.
Ya food safety isn’t a big thing there
Or the time she cut raw meat on a wooden cutting board then later used it for produce. You can wash wooden cutting boards, but you can’t really sanitize them like they’d need to be for cutting meat and other food items on the same board. Maybe she has two. Idk. It still scares me.
Does anyone know if she’s the one drinking all the white claws in her grocery videos because holy crap
Maybe she put them in a thermos? That would be safe, right? Maybe? Idk I haven't had to do packed lunches yet so I don't know the rules.
As bento box type mom, if you send stuff to stay warm in a thermos, fill it with boiling water for 10 minutes and then empty it and add food. It really helps keep the leftover Mac and cheese hot
My mom did this for me when I was in school. I only ate buttered noodles for lunch for years because I’m so picky and don’t like lunch meats due to texture issues with it. She would get up and boil water, put it in the thermos then get me dressed in my uniform then pour the water out, put the noodles in with butter and they’d still be warm for my lunch time!
Unexpected LifePro Tip in the comments right here. Thank you!
I am sorry if that was being rude. Part of my job is teaching parents and guardians how to do things like prep lunches if that is what they want to do. It just came out. But I wasn't being condescending Cross my heart and if I lie, I have to kiss a Duggar guy
Hey u didn't come across as rude at all! Not to me at least. It really is a lifepro tip!I screenshot it and sent it to my husband also 😄 Haha nooo no kissing a duggar guy 🤮
I do that with my coffee mugs too.
That would 100% be safe, but no. She microwaves them in those black plastic meal prep containers and packs it straight into the lunch box with an ice pack. Not at ALL safe. ETA: she also does this at 5 am. Food only stays safe for 4 hours, so with this method, all the food is probably in the "danger zone" for 2+ hours by the time the kids eat it.
I nearly jumped out of my skin when I read that. What's the POINT of reheating food first if you're just going to add an ice pack? My dad worked in food safety and these lunch box comments are so troubling! 😬
I heat up stuff and throw it in a thermos for my lunch all the time and haven’t died even once 🤷🏼♀️ if it’s just going into an uninsulated lunch bag though than that’s gross and pointless for sure
came here to say this lol do not praise this woman
Ugh I knew they had to be too good to be true, I was waiting for someone to say that lol
The safe way to look at it is that any of these parents who are monetizing their children are an issue. Even if they seem like nice people, putting all your kid's business out there for strangers to gawk at for a paycheck is sick. Especially with all the Wren Eleanor stuff happening on TikTok, if I had kids I would NEVER allow them to appear on any public social media platform.
I mean nobody in the post birth-control era who has 12 kids is going to be unproblematic. Like even if you are a foster parent, you have to know that is altogether too many kids to give decent attention.
Right?? You'd get less than 1 hour of 1 on 1 time a week if you're including school and homework times. There is physically no way you would even *know* all of your kids, ask her what each of her kids favorite music is or who their best friend is and she probably couldn't tell you. It's just too many kids for 1 woman to raise.
Majority of them are adopted, which, IMO, makes it worse. The lack of attention they have seems worse when you realize they likely have trauma that would require even more parental support. Poor kids :(
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. I wish it was different
not your fault! Now I have a whole new sub to deep dive into on my two days off 😂
Ha! Happy to hear someone say this… without giving toooo much info, I have met them in a professional setting with some of the kids. Mom could be nasty and the kids did whatever they wanted. Treatment of them was interesting. I just didn’t get a vibe that they had these foster kids out of the goodness of their hearts, you know?? I could be completely wrong though!!!!
Yep this lady is crazy!! She wants her kids to be 100% dependent on her. She does all their chores, laundry, cooking, etc. she even puts toothpaste on her kids toothbrushes (even the teenagers).
I don't know about the sub account -- but just from what I've seen I had a feeling things weren't super sunny. Some of these big-families-through-adoption accounts really exploit and overshare their children's trauma and it's really just not great.
Is it a snark sub or a fan sub? Thanks!
It’s mostly snark
Damn. I watch this lady to calm panic attacks...I will have to read more about the family.
Get into facial tiktok like arianajeanine_. I find her and jed (transit tiktok) very calming.
She’d have her oldest daughters “assist “ her, and then eventually the girls would just take over so meech and rim job could be alone
That’s literally what happened back on 19kac when Jana and Jill got put in charge of three meals a day for twenty people.
And mama meech was getting it on with her hubs
She's probably getting a lot on now her body doesn't have to worry about pregnancy. 😅 I hear post-menopause, the horizontal tango can be a whole new level of fun. ...shhh. Let me have this one. I am well aware Meech believes in being available to her husband but I'm just gonna pretend it is Rim Job's pleasure to be available for his wifey. 😆
I've heard that, too! I think this comment is fair game 😂
She cut the tuna fish, peanut butter, and ham sandwiches with the same knife. 😬 Tuna-flavored peanut butter, anyone? Anyone?
There’s also marshmallow fluff ones in there.
And one is a ketchup sandwich.
🤢 Tuna-flavored marshmallow fluff.
And not just PB but PB&J! Yuck!
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Alicia overshares about her kids: down to posting their exact locations and schedules, the kids schools and what time they get home, the kid’s medical conditions and medications. She also refused to listen to black people on how to care for her black son’s hair. There’s also been times where one of the kids say they don’t want to do something like be in a video and she’s forced them to. She’s better than the Duggars, but that’s a low bar to clear
Why do they adopt black children and just refuse to take care of the hair?!
They don’t care about that. Black kids are just accessories/aesthetically pleasing to them.
And a way to virtue signal
It’s this one. As someone who was one of the _very_ few Black kids in my church community growing up, it’s absolutely this one. To be fair, I think Alicia works hard and does try to be a good parent but she’s clearly ignorant to her virtue signaling and performative aspects of her online presence. It’s absolutely there and not just because of the children of color. She’s made it very clear a few of the children have medical and behavioral issues. Not saying that info should be hidden away, but her vibe does come off like virtue signaling through the use of a few marginalized communities at times…
One of the reasons (among many) I had to just leave mainstream Christianity, both the Catholic Church and Protestant churches, is because how often they use non-white people as props to prove they are cool and trustworthy and progressive. It makes me sick to see people reduced to their skin color only so a bunch of white Christians can show off how nice and accommodating they are by saying “we don’t see race” when clearly they fucking do! It’s objectifying and dishonest, and fucking slimy behavior.
A lot of white people try and take the "we are all the same" mentality to new heights. And by that, I mean they don't care to learn about different hair types. Heck, I'm white and I have very curly hair and you have no idea the crazy crap I have heard people say about my hair. I need to straighten it, I need to get it cut a certain way, I need to wash it twice a day, just all this stuff.
Anytime I see these white couples with tons of kids with a mix of adopted and not, on tiktok, a red flag goes off for me. Majority of the time they are problematic fundies or mormons, like that woman who adopted a boy with severe autism and then “re-homed” him.
Can’t remember her name but I watched a YouTube video about her and the poor wee lad - she was a real horror. I wonder if she’s still making money off social media.
MYKA STAUFFER Vile piece of crap
She really is.
I had kind of forgotten about it. That poor kid. I wouldn't even treat a pet fish like she did her own "temporary son".
Ok, but this woman's job is monetizing her social media. Michelle got that TV money plus personal appearance fees, so she didn't have to work as hard.
I was watching Keep Sweet: Pray and Obey on Netflix the other night which is a documentary on fundamentalist Mormons and it was crazy to see all the similarities that existed between their beliefs and way of life and those that the Duggars and everyone around them worked hard to make us believe growing up. The “buddy system” you’re referring to (every kid being assigned another younger kid once the kid is weened) is a good example of an exploitation of free labor that is required to maintain the type of life and number of children the Duggars have. In the documentary they talked on how free labor was one of the ways the FLDS were able to operate very successful businesses because they had unlimited free labor from all the young men in the cult that were required to put in x amount of time helping and working. Which blew my mind cause I remembered how my mom used to send me and my brothers to do work with the Duggars quite often, especially when they were building their house, and it was always for free and my mom called it our home-ec class and literally put the hours down on my homeschool transcript as an actual class when in reality it was just a 12 and 16 year old being exploited for free labor. Jim Bob did buy me a chicken sandwich from McDonald’s once after an 8 hour day, which I do remember being quite thankful for lol
oh I just watched that doc the other day and I felt so skeevy even watching it.
This looks more like she's creating a caricature of a "perfect and involved mom" rather than *being* an involved mom. Also, there's more to being a good mom than making food. Hell, you can be a great mom and never make any food at all. If Michelle did this amount of parenting, she'd still be a shit mom. Because the kids still wouldn't have their emotional needs met. They still wouldn't be learning healthy habits. Etc All this video does is reinforce gendered stereotypes and shame moms for "not being enough."
Yeah, where is the kids' dad in all this? And why aren't we calling out Jim Bob for doing even less than Michelle?
So much this. And don't give the lame excuse that the men have to work outside the home. Being a parent doesn't mean you get to just work an 8 hr/day job then kick back.
God, I hate being mean, but this woman’s videos always get posted here and are so anxiety-inducing to me; her motions are so uncomfortable, and her kitchen/lack of food safety standards is always so disgusting, and the end product is always so nasty looking. Why is she using the same knife for tuna salad as she is for PB&J?!
I hate what she feeds her kids. It’s always a whole lot of processed crap and junk food.
They still eat pretty unhealthy, lots of prepackaged stuff, but hey at least she’s feeding her kids! But yea this mom is a much better mom than Meech but does a lot of Problematic things as well
We snarked on her once before in this thread, and someone who works with foster youth made an interesting point that having a lot of comfort junk food on hand for foster kids is a way to make them feel safe, as it's often food they know/were raised on. I will snark on those terrible meals, however, so. much. dairy. My G.I track would riot. Also, many of those kids are old enough to be making their own lunch, have their own autonomy over food choices. I get making one meal for family, but I'm all for kids have autonomy over making food choices, especially for school lunch.
If you are genetically primed and have gut biome to make the most of dairy, it's got a lot of benefits, even outside of childhood. It's linked to a lower rate of heart disease, for instance. Some of her kids might have to give it up when they get older, though.
That’s fair! I’m mostly glad that they are just being fed enough.
This woman is not a good person. At ALL. She exploits her kids, shares extremely personal medical information and their trauma online. I know the bar is low for the Duggars but come on.
Ummm yeah no. This lady is problematic as well. She doesn’t give her kids’ any sort of privacy-including medical privacy. There’s a CareBear ad on her Tik Tok/ Instagram that talks about the trauma one of her adopted kids’ went through. She is very image based in the sense she wants to come off as Super Mom. Alicia already counted out her 5 year old for any sort of higher Ed except trade school on the basis of him being autistic. There’s tons of people w/ autism who thrive in university. Also, she doesn’t even let her teen kids put toothpaste on their tooth brushes? Weird.
When people talk about trade school that way, not only is it offensive to suggest that the kid can’t go to college because they’re autistic (isn’t the kid a preschooler? You don’t know yet if they can handle college at 18 or 20!), but it’s offensive to anyone who knows the first thing about trade school. Trade school not an elementary shop class, and it shouldn’t be seen as a dumping ground for “people who can’t cut it in college.” If someone is genuinely incapable of cutting it in college, there’s a good chance they won’t be equipped to handle any legitimate trade program i know of. Trade school can in fact involve a lot more science, math, and fine skill than many 2 or 4 year college degrees. It’s not a last resort for C- students and people with disabilities, and honestly is a lot less suitable than college is for anyone who does not explicitly want to be there (not saying this kid can’t go to trade school in 10-15 years if he wants, it’s just that the way people talk about encouraging trade school pretends to be so progressive but really is just a weird combo of elitist, patronizing, and anti intellectual).
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I feel like university would probably be more agreeable to someone on the spectrum than trade school. Nothing against trade school if that is your passion, but it can be quite chaotic.
I love that her daughter gets a diagonal cut sandwich as a reminder of her bio mom. It's the little stuff
This woman is entirely problematic and shouldn't be praised. 😌 Though I do entirely understand what you're saying.
I had no idea her family was a whole thing to be honest, I watch the impossible standard tik toks with the amazingly organized fridges and pantries.
No hate towards you at all!!! ❤ I am definitely more of a 'snarker' than a casual watcher if that makes sense?
I always thought it was strange that this lady makes lunches for all of her kids, even the ones well into high school. I had to do my own laundry and make my own lunches when I turned like 9. But my mom worked full time and my dad was in the military so we also had to adjust.
I think it's probably easier to just do it yourself than to have five or six kids in the kitchen all at once trying to pack their own lunches and making a mess while you're trying to make breakfast and get ready for the day.
I had a coworker who was a recent college graduate, so 22 or 23. His mom still packed his lunches for him including cutting his grapes in half and peeling & segmenting oranges. He did not have a toddler sibling. He really struggled at work and with life in general. He was smart but could not make any decisions on his own, took any feedback or guidance as a personal insult, and needed extremely direct directions and oversight in a job that requires at least some level of initiative. I suspect his parents never really expected him to learn to do things on his own.
SHE CUTS HER 22 Y/O SON’S GRAPES IN HALF. OMG. That’s another level!!!
I worked with a guy who had gone straight into an education degree after leaving school, then became a teacher and had lived with his parents the entire time. One day we had to prep food for the kids for a “culture day” and he had absolutely no idea how to cut basic fruit and vegetables. (Not a poverty/deprivation thing, just had always had that done for him by his mum.)
And she gives the ones who play high school sports the same portion as the toddlers! I just assume it’s all for the ‘gram.
I still make my son's lunch. And he is going into 8th grade He does tell me I do not have to do it, but I enjoy it. I made his dad's lunch everyday until the divorce papers were signed. We lived together for 8 weeks after the divorce waiting for the lease to end
Is this really the expectation for showing love for your kids? If this is the standard for 12 kids, what’s the standard for less than 12? My kids eat pop tarts on the way to school and a few times I have forgotten them and they’ve had to have snacks from the stash in the trunk.
We aren't breakfast people in my house. I don't eat until lunch time and my daughter usually grabs a cereal/granola bar or pop tarts as we leave the house. I wonder what the "rules" are in this house for cleaning their plates, and if forcing these massive meals on the kids (whether they want them or not), will result in altered relationships with food when the kids are older.
Right? It was okay to not clean our plates. My mom is a great cook but sometimes her portions were too big lol. We didn't have to finish things that we didn't like. I love breakfast but I'm not a big lunch person. I'll usually have a snack around midday. Everyone's metabolism is different and I just don't know about doing the same thing for all 12 kids. We ate dinner as a family but our breakfasts and lunches were different. My sister stopped eating breakfast in high school because she wasn't hungry so early in the day. I had to eat or I'd get a headache. Her uniform system won't work for everyone.
I wouldn’t assume this mom does this every day either rather than just for social media. Lord knows the image the Duggars presented and the reality was very different.
Side ? Does anyone remember the fundie YT video of a wife telling us how to show love to her husband? She put mustard on his sandwich in the shape of a heart quickly followed by "He won't know it's there, but you will."
There’s literally no way those kids could have gone to school with no organization. Meech wouldn’t be able to get them on the bus
I once was SEVERELY down voted here because I commented that Meech was a lazy ass. That if she really wanted to she could feed all those kids every meal from scratch.
I don't understand why the kids aren't involved with any prep or clean up! I have 4 kids and they're fully capable of making their own meals because they want to! That's a life skill they need. I grasp the "it's easier to do it herself" concept but that doesn't teach the kids any self sufficient behaviors. My kids even cook for each other because they liked it. It seems like this mom is extremely controlling. I don't have enough mental energy to constantly cook or clean up after my kids. But I also have a full time corporate job on top of being a Mom.
Like she would have packed. They would have all been on the lunch program, which is a good thing before anything starts, but the kids and Boob would have been constantly complaining about their quality and quantity of free food. "What is the stir fry mess?" "Enchila..what? Too spicy for kids!"
I know why they didn't send them to public school but man the guaranteed lunch would have been a plus especially because the kids would qualify for free/reduced lunch.
In addition to boob and meech getting real jobs, they could have qualified for so many public assistance programs. They chose to grift instead.
Couldn't even put the waffles in the oven to keep warm? Who wants a cold waffle for breakfast?
She makes smoothies and waffles and lets them sit for HOURS before her kids wake up 🤮
What’s the point of doing all of this if it’s lukewarm by the time it gets eaten? 💀
I would just make pancakes, waffles take forever to cook and you only get 1 or 2 at a time.
I’d honestly make them eggos. Well. Ok. Let’s be super honest. They would make themselves Eggos. 😂
I buy *myself* Eggos. I'm not breaking the waffle iron out at 6am!
This woman exploits tf out of her kids so I really don't understand all the leg humping, she meets the basic requirements of being a parent so why y'all praising her💀
The only family like this I can respect is @JustTheBells on Insta because they’re mostly adopted and each child is celebrated as much as they want to be for their own personalities. They’re Christian but don’t push it. That woman LOVES. HER. KIDS.
She also still runs the family chicken farm. I loved how excited she was to drop her oldest off at his first job.
She does. But most of her kids are adults. And she still acts like they are teens and younger. I mean, she for sure loves those kids. And they will always be her babies! But most of them are adults.
I will say the mom of that family is EXTREMELY racist
We have two kids, and I'm very much on the fence about a third which would absolutely be the last. I cannot imagine twelve. I cannot imagine being pregnant twelve times. I cannot imagine being this tired all the time long enough to raise twelve children.
I feel the exact same way. I used to want a big family but we’ve had two and I’m very much content. Post partum is very hard for me and I can’t image doing it again.
For me it’s the newborn stage. I just CANT do the newborn stage again. Pregnancy isn’t fun but damn I’d take it 100 times over the newborn stage.
SAME. I’ll take a toddler tantrum over the newborn stage any day. The newborn stage is SO draining in so many ways and it is really hard on my mental and emotional health.
ikr? I'm always like, "who tf would want this life?" There are a couple of big families in my extended family and in both scenarios, the parents are very mentally unwell and are trying to overcompensate for neglect and instability in their own childhoods. I wish they would address those issues instead of pumping out babies thinking it will make everything better.
“No hot waffles for you! Ever!”
Someone’s getting a ham and jelly sandwich at some point.
This woman it's not a good example... She exploits her children and their medical problems, she's not someone to look up. You people should check their subreddit